COME HERE. COME HERE.
THE POSTMAN.
"AND SO THE
DAY PASSED, AND EVENING CAME."
A LETTER, MUM.
KATE CHAPTAN
HAS BOUGHT SOME CAKE.
WHOM CAN SHE BE
EXPECTING TO TEA?
WE'LL FIND OUT.
IF YOU WISH, MARY.
RESUME, FANNIE, DEAR.
"THE VILLAGE CLOCK
VERILY TOLLED THE HOUR.
"1...
"2...
"3...
"4...
5."
IT'S THAT IMPERTINEN RECRUITING SERGEANT.
I PASSED HIM
ON THE STREET YESTERDAY.
HE CLOSED
ONE OF HIS EYES AT ME,
THEN QUICKLY OPENED I AGAIN.
I KNEW WHAT HE MEANT.
RESUME, FANNIE, DEAR.
"SUDDENLY,
OUT OF THE DARKNESS,
THERE EMERGED A MAN"...
"THE UNHAPPY CAPTAIN OF A
STANDING LOST IN REVELING,
"WHEN, WITHOUT PAUSING TO
ADVERTISE HER MISINTENTIONS,
"HE TOOK BOTH HER HANDS
IN HIS.
"SLOWLY HE GATHERED HER
IN HIS ARMS
AND RAINED HOT,
BURNING KISSES-"
SISTER!
MISS SUSAN,
I AM INDEED SURPRISED
YOU SHOULD HAVE BROUGHT SUCH
AN AMAZING INDELICATE TALE
FROM THE LIBRARY.
I DEEPLY REGRET,
MISS WILLOUGHBY.
OH, FANNIE...
IF YOU PLEASE.
I THANK YOU.
MISS SUSAN IS LOOKING
AT THE END.
FORGIVE MY PARTIALITY
FOR ROMANCE.
IT IS, I FEAR,
THE MARK OF AN OLD MAID.
OH, SUSAN, THAT WORD.
IT'S WHAT I AM, MARY.
AND YOU, TOO, MY DEAR.
I'M HAPPY PHOEBE
WILL NOT BE AN OLD MAID.
OH, PHOEBE.
I BEG YOUR PARDON.
WITH YOUR PERMISSION,
MISS SUSAN,
I SHALL PUT ON MY WRAPS.
YOU HAVE IT,
MARY, DEAR.
MISS SUSAN, DO YOU MEAN
THAT MR. B
HAS PROPOSED TO HER?
HENRIETTA,
I EXPECT IT HOURLY.
YOU SEEM STRANGELY
EXCITED, PHOEBE.
SUSAN, I ME A CERTAIN INDIVIDUAL.
MR. B?
OH, MY DEAR,
YOU'RE TREMBLING.
NO. OH. OH, NO.
YOU PUT YOUR HAND
TO YOUR HEART.
DID I?
MY LOVE, HAS HE OFFERED?
SUSAN!
NOT YET.
BUT I WAS SITTING
WITH AN UNHAPPY WOMAN
WHOSE HUSBAND HAD-
HOW DO YOU DO,
MISS PHOEBE?
SUSAN, I HAVE NO WISH
TO ALARM YOU,
BUT I AM OF OPINION
THERE IS A MAN IN THE HOUSE.
A MAN?
TOBACCO SMOKE.
THE KITCHEN.
I'VE BEEN JUS A LITTLE AFRAID OF PATTY.
PATTY, I HOPE WE MAY NO HURT YOUR FEELINGS, BUT-
ARE YOU IMPLICATING, MUM,
THAT I AM A FOLLOWER?
OH, NO.
SO BE IT.
PATTY, THERE IS A MAN
IN THE HOUSE.
TO THE DOOR WITH HIM.
AND IF HE REFUSES?
OH, DEAR.
IF HE REFUSES,
SEND HIM HERE TO ME.
LIONHEARTED PHOEBE.
SERGEANT, I'M WISHFUL
TO SCOLD YOU,
BUT WOULD YOU BE SO OBLIGING
AS TO STAND ON THAT PAPER
WHILE I DO IT?
WITH ALL THE PLEASURE
IN LIFE.
A SHUDDER
GOES THROUGH ME
WHEN I SEE YOU
IN THE STREETS
ENTICING THOSE
POOR YOUNG MEN.
I TELL THEM WHAT THEY'RE
WISHFUL TO HEAR, MUM.
THERE HAVE BEEN 5 OF THEM ALL THIS WEEK
LISTENING TO ME AND
SHOWING ME THEIR HEELS,
BUT BY A GRAND STROKE
OF LUCK,
I HAVE THEM AT LAST.
LUCK?
THE LUCKIEST, MUM,
FOR A GENTLEMAN OF
THIS TOWN HAS ENLISTED.
THAT GAVE THEM
THE PUSH FORWARD.
A GENTLEMAN
OF THIS TOWN IS ENLISTED?
YES.
SERGEANT, WHO?
THAT'D BE A SECRET, MUM.
BE SO OBLIGING.
THAT I CANNOT DO.
OH, BUT YOU MUST.
YOU MUST.
UM, SERGEANT, I'VE NO BEEN SAYING THE THINGS
I MEANT TO SAY TO YOU.
WOULD YOU PLEASE EXCUSE MY
TURNING YOU OUT OF THIS HOUSE
SOMEWHAT VIOLENTLY?
OH, BLESS YOUR HEART,
MUM, I'M USED TO IT.
I WON'T REALLY HURT YOU.
THANK YOU KINDLY.
BE GONE, SIR!
I FORGET, SIR,
I SHALL PERMIT NO FOLLOWERS IN MY HOUSE.
SHOULD I DISCOVER YOU
IN MY KITCHEN AGAIN,
I SHALL PITCH YOU OU NECK AND CLASP!
BE GONE!
GO.
HOW SWEET.
PHOEBE, WE COULD NO BUT ADMIRE YOU.
YES-I MEAN,
COULDN'T YOU?
COME, HENRIETTA.
CONGRATULATIONS,
PHOEBE.
PHOEBE, DEAR,
I WISH YOU VERY HAPPY.
MISS PHOEBE,
I GIVE YOU JOY.
SUSAN, YOU'VE BEEN TALKING
TO THEM ABOUT MR. B.
I COULDN'T HELP IT.
OH, SUSAN!
PHOEBE, WHAT IS IT?
YOU HAVE TO TELL ME.
WELL, AS YOU KNOW,
I WAS SITTING
WITH AN UNHAPPY WOMAN
WHOSE HUSBAND
WAS KILLED IN THE WAR,
AND AS I CAME OU OF THE COTTAGE,
HE WAS PASSING.
AND...
HE OFFERED ME
HIS ESCORT.
AT FIRST HE WAS
VERY SILEN AS HE HAS OFTEN BEEN
OF LATE.
WE KNOW WHY.
PLEASE NOT TO SAY
THAT I KNOW WHY.
SUDDENLY, HE STOPPED
AND SWUNG HIS CANE.
YOU KNOW HOW GALLANTLY
HE SWINGS HIS CANE?
YES INDEED.
HE SAID,
"I HAVE SOMETHING
"I'M WISHFUL TO TELL YOU, MISS PHOEBE.
PERHAPS YOU CAN GUESS
WHAT IT IS."
TO SAY I COULD GUESS IS TO
WOULD HAVE BEEN UNLADYLIKE.
I SAID, "PLEASE
NOT TO TELL ME
IN THE PUBLIC
THOROUGHFARE,"
TO WHICH HE
INSTANTLY REPLIED,
"THEN I SHALL CALL AND
TELL YOU THIS AFTERNOON."
PHOEBE.
SUSAN, TO THINK THA IT HAS ALL HAPPENED
IN A SINGLE YEAR.
SUCH A GENTILE COMPETENCY
AS HE CAN OFFER.
A PHYSICIAN.
AND SO DASHING.
AND, SUSAN,
HOW AMUSING HE IS.
YES, ISN'T HE?
THE DAY HE FIRS DRANK TEA IN THIS HOUSE.
HE SMOKED HIS PIPE
IN THIS ROOM.
SMOKING IS INDEED
A DREADFUL HABIT.
BUT THERE'S
- THERE'S SOMETHING SO DASHING ABOUT IT.
PHOEBE, I HAVE
A WEDDING GIFT FOR YOU.
SUSAN, NOT YET.
IT'S BEEN READY
FOR A LONG TIME.
I MEANT IT FOR MYSELF.
IT WAS YEARS AGO.
I HAD HOPED THAT HE-
HIS NAME WAS WILLIAM.
BUT I'M AFRAID I WAS TOO
UNATTRACTIVE, MY LOVE.
SWEETEST, DEAREST.
HE WAS A NAVAL OFFICER.
BUT SOMETHING HAPPENED-
A MISS CECILY PEMBELTON.
AND THEY'RE
QUITE BIG BOYS NOW.
SUSAN, WHAT IS IT?
A WEDDING GOWN,
MY DEAR.
EVEN PLAYING WITH IT...
WE CAN'T HELP IT, PHOEBE.
WHEN WE ARE YOUNG,
WE HAVE ROMANTIC IDEAS
JUST AS IF
WE WERE PRETTY.
LONG BEFORE IT WAS FINISHED,
I KNEW HE WOULD NOT OFFER...
BUT I FINISHED IT.
AND THEN I PUT IT AWAY.
BUT OF LATE, I'VE TAKEN
IT OUT, ALTERED IT.
SUSAN,
I COULDN'T WEAR IT.
OH, HOW SWEET.
HOW BEAUTIFUL.
YOU WILL WEAR IT,
MY LOVE, WON'T YOU?
THE ROAST BEEF
OF OLD ENGLAND
AND ALL THE OLD
IT IS HE.
THAT KNOCK.
SO DASHING.
SO IMPERIOUS.
SUSAN, I THINK
HE KISSED ME ONCE.
YOU THINK?
I KNOW HE DID.
THAT EVENING
A WEEK AGO
WHEN HE WAS SQUIRING ME
HOME FROM THE CONCERT.
IT WAS RAINING,
AND MY FACE WAS WET.
HE SAID THAT WAS WHY
HE DID IT.
BECAUSE YOUR FACE WAS WET?
DOESN'T SEEM A
SUFFICIENT EXCUSE NOW.
OH, PHOEBE,
BEFORE HE OFFERED.
I FEAR ME IT WAS
MOST UNLADYLIKE.
DR. BROWN!
MISS SUSAN.
HOW DO YOU DO, MA'AM?
MISS PHOEBE, THOUGH WE MET TODAY ALREADY,
I INSIST ON SHAKING
HANDS WITH YOU AGAIN.
ALWAYS SO DASHING.
WILL YOU TAKE TEA,
SIR?
THANK YOU.
HOW MANY LUMPS,
SIR, 2?
5, IF I MAY.
UM...
MAY I SIT ON THIS CHAIR, MISS PHOEBE?
I KNOW MISS SUSAN LIKES
ME TO BREAK HER CHAIRS.
INDEED I DO NOT,
SIR.
PHOEBE, HOW STRANGE
THAT HE SHOULD THINK SO.
HOW YOU SEE THROUGH ME, MISS PHOEBE.
SO YOU THINK ME DASHING, MISS SUSAN?
AM I DASHING,
MISS PHOEBE?
A LITTLE, I THINK.
I HAVE SOMETHING
TO TELL YOU TODAY
THAT I THINK IS
RATHER DASHING.
BUT YOU'RE NOT GOING, MA'AM,
BEFORE YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS?
AYE. INDEED, SIR.
TO BE SURE.
I KNOW WHAT IT IS,
MR. BROWN.
SUSAN.
I MEAN, I DO NOT KNOW.
I MEAN... I CAN GUESS.
OH, WHY DON'T YOU STROLL
IN THE GARDEN?
SHALL WE?
YES, INDEED.
YOU KNOW, MISS PHOEBE...
YES, MR. BROWN-BROWN?
TO ME YOU'LL ALWAYS BE
LIKE THIS QUIE OLD-FASHIONED GARDEN
FULL OF THE FLOWERS
I LOVE BES BECAUSE I'VE KNOWN THEM
LONGEST:
THE DAISY THAT STANDS
FOR INNOCENCE,
THE HYACINTH
FOR CONSTANCY,
THE MODEST VIOLET...
AND THE ROSE.
IT'S A PRETTY SPEECH,
SIR.
AND FROM MY HEART...
MISS SUSAN'S ANTICS JUST NOW
ARE MOST UNEXPECTED.
HOW COULD SHE KNOW
MY SECRET?
WELL...
YOU MEAN
YOU'D FORESEEN IT, TOO?
SIR, YOU MUSTN' ASK THAT.
IN ANY CASE,
I THINK IT WAS YOU
WHO FIRST PUT I IN MY MIND.
OH, I HOPE NOT.
YOUR EYES FLASHED EVERY
TIME THE WAR WAS MENTIONED.
MR. BROWN...
WHAT IS IT THA YOU HAVE TO TELL US?
THAT I'VE ENLISTED,
MISS PHOEBE.
DID YOU SURMISE
IT WAS SOMETHING ELSE?
GOING TO THE WAR,
MR. BROWN?
IS IT A JEST?
IT WOULD BE
A SORRY JEST, MA'AM.
I THOUGHT YOU KNEW.
I CONCLUDED THE RECRUITING
SERGEANT HAD TALKED.
RECRUITING SERGEANT?
I SEE.
IN THESE STIRRING TIMES,
A MAN CAN'T STAY
AT HOME.
YESTERDAY I FOUND
THERE WERE 5 WAVERERS.
I ASKED THEM WOULD THEY
JOINED THE COLORS IF I DID,
AND THEY ASSENTED.
MISS PHOEBE, IT'S NOT ONE
MAN I GIVE TO THE KING,
BUT 6.
I THINK YOU'VE DONE
BRAVELY, MR. BROWN.
WE LEAVE IMMEDIATELY FOR
THE PETERBOROUGH BARRACKS.
SO THIS IS GOOD-BYE.
I SHALL PRAY THAT YOU MAY
BE PRESERVED IN BATTLE,
MR. BROWN.
WILL YOU AND MISS SUSAN
WRITE TO ME
IF AN OCCASION OFFERS?
IF YOU WISH IT.
WITH ALL THE STIRRING NEWS
OF DEAR QUALITY STREET.
IT SEEMS STIRRING TO US.
IT MUST HAVE BEEN
MERELY LAUGHABLE TO YOU.
I'VE MADE FRIENDS HERE-
2 VERY SWEET LADIES.
AND DID I AMUSE YOU ALSO?
ENORMOUSLY.
THOSE OTHER LADIES
WERE ALWAYS SCOLDING,
AND YOUR YOUTHFULNESS
SHOCKED THEM.
I BELIEVE THEY THOUGH YOU DASHING.
I SOMETIMES FEEL THAT I
WAS PERHAPS TOO DASHING.
TELL ME, IS IT-
SUSAN.
YOU SEEM SO CALM,
PHOEBE.
SUSAN, HE IS A GENTLEMAN
WHO HAS ENLISTED,
AND HE CAME TO TELL US
THAT AND SAY GOOD-BYE.
GOING AWAY?
YES, DEAR.
WELL, AM I NO THE IDEAL RECRUIT, MA'AM?
A MAN WITHOUT A WIFE,
A MOTHER, OR A SWEETHEART.
NO SWEETHEART?
HAVE YOU ONE FOR ME,
MISS SUSAN?
SUSAN, WE SHALL
HAVE TO TELL HIM NOW.
YOU WILL LAUGH, SIR,
AND SAY THAT IT IS JUS LIKE QUALITY STREET.
WELL, INDEED,
SINCE I MET YOU TODAY
AND YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU
HAD SOMETHING TO COMMUNICATE,
WE'VE BEEN PUZZLING
AS TO WHAT IT COULD BE,
AND WE CONCLUDED THAT YOU
WERE GOING TO BE... MARRIED.
OH, WAS THAT IT?
SO LIKE WOMEN, YOU KNOW.
WE THOUGHT PERHAPS
WE KNEW HER.
WE WERE EVEN DISCUSSING WHA WE SHOULD WEAR AT THE WEDDING.
WELL, I WONDER WHO'D
HAVE ME, MISS SUSAN.
I MUST LEAVE NOW.
GOD BLESS YOU BOTH.
YOU ARE GOING?
NO MORE MUD ON YOUR CARPETS, MISS SUSAN.
NO MORE BREAKING
YOUR CHAIRS.
A GOOD RIDDANCE.
MISS PHOEBE,
A LAST LOOK
AT THE GARDEN.
GOOD-BYE.
A MISUNDERSTANDING.
JUST A MISTAKE.
WE CAN LET IT DOWN.
OTHER GENTLEMEN HAVE BEEN
ATTRACTED BY YOU, PHOEBE.
I DIDN'T WANT THEM.
THEY WILL COME AGAIN.
AND OTHERS.
NO.
NEVER SPEAK OF THA TO ME ANYMORE.
I LET HIM KISS ME.
YOU COULD NOT PREVENT HIM.
YES, I COULD.
I KNOW I COULD NOW.
I WANTED HIM TO DO IT.
OH, NEVER SPEAK TO ME
OF OTHERS AFTER THAT.
PERHAPS HE SAW
I WANTED HIM TO DO I AND DID IT TO PLEASE ME.
BUT I MEANT IT.
INDEED I DID,
AND I GAVE IT TO HIM
WILL ALL MY LOVE.
SISTER, I COULD BEAR
ALL THE REST...
BUT I'VE BEEN
UNLADYLIKE.
LEFT!
LEFT, RIGHT, LEFT!
LEFT!
LEFT, RIGHT, LEFT!
DON'T BREAK
YOUR MOTHER'S HEART,
AND YOU WON'T BREAK MINE!
PHOEBE.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
THAT WILL DO.
YOU MAY BE SEATED.
PHOEBE, HOW MUCH
ARE 14 AND 17?
THANK YOU.
HOW CLEVER YOU ARE.
MASTER DOUGLAS, RISE.
NOT DOUGLAS MAJOR,
DOUGLAS MINOR.
HOW MUCH ARE 14 AND 17?
COME ON!
COME ON!
PERHAPS HE REMAINS
IN LONDON.
COME, CHILDREN.
CHILDREN. CHILDREN, YOU WILL
ALL RETURN TO YOUR DESKS,
IF YOU PLEASE.
GO ON. GO.
PHOEBE, IF A HERRING AND
A HALF COSTS 3 HALFPENCE,
HOW MANY FOR 11 PENCE?
WILLIAM SMITH SAYS IT'S 15,
AND HE'S SUCH A BIG BOY.
DO YOU THINK
I OUGHT TO CONTRADICT HIM?
MAY I SUGGES THERE ARE DIFFERENCES
OF OPINION ABOUT IT?
ONE CAN'T BE REALLY SURE,
PHOEBE.
IT IS 11.
I ONCE WORKED IT OU WITH REAL HERRINGS.
SUSAN, WE MUSTN'T LET THE BIG BOYS KNOW
THAT WE'RE AFRAID
OF THEM.
TO AWE THEM,
STAMP WITH THE FOOT,
SPEAK IN
A FEROCIOUS VOICE,
AND LOOK THEM UNFLINCHINGLY IN THE FACE.
WILLIAM SMITH,
PLEASE RISE.
PHOEBE, WILLIAM SMITH
PUT HIS TONGUE OUT AT ME.
CHILDREN,
YOU ARE DISMISSED.
PHOEBE!
HE'S MUCH TOO BIG.
LET IT PASS.
AND BE A STUMBLING BLOCK IN
THE WAY OF TRUE EDUCATION?
SUSAN, STAND ASIDE.
PATTY.
DR. BROWN.
IT'S DR. BROWN.
CAPTAIN BROWN.
REPORTS HIMSELF
AT HOME AGAIN.
YOU CALL THIS HOME?
MISS SUSAN, I'M
DELIGHTED TO FIND
SO LITTLE CHANGE
IN YOU.
AND MISS PHOEBE, WHERE'S
MISS PHOEBE OF THE RINGLETS?
PHOEBE OF THE RINGLETS?
OH, CAPTAIN BROWN, YOU
DID NOT EXPECT TO SEE HER.
SHE'S NOT HERE?
THAT SPOILS
MY HOMECOMING.
PHOEBE, DID YOU SEE
WHO IT IS?
SUSAN, I'VE LOS ALL MY LOOKS.
A YOUNG REPROBATE,
MA'AM,
BUT I DEPOSITED HIM
ON THE STREET.
WHY, MISS PHOEBE.
IT'S YOU.
YES.
I'VE, UM,
CHANGED VERY MUCH.
I HAVE NOT WORN WELL,
CAPTAIN BROWN.
WE'RE BOTH OLDER,
MISS PHOEBE.
YES.
I'M DISMISSING
THE CHILDREN.
GENTLEMEN, SALUTE,
LADIES, CURTSY
TO THE BRAVE
CAPTAIN BROWN.
A TERRIBLE ORDEAL,
MA'AM.
MISS PHOEBE, WHY DIDN' YOU SAY IN YOUR LETTERS
YOU HAD SUCH A YOUNG BLACKGUARD
AS THAT TO TERRIFY YOU?
WELL, HE IS THE ONLY ONE.
MOST OF THEM
ARE DEAR CHILDREN
AND THIS IS THE LAST DAY
OF THE TERM.
THAT'S FORTUNATE. YOU LOOK SO
- SO TIRED.
OH, I HAVE
A HEADACHE TODAY.
I WAS IN HOPES
YOU AND MISS SUSAN
WOULD BE GOING
TO THE BALL.
I BROUGHT CARDS FOR
YOU TO MAKE SURE.
BUT-
NOW YOU SAY
MY DANCING DAYS ARE DONE?
OH, NO.
YOU WILL FIND MANY
CHARMING PARTNERS.
I WISH YOU A HAPPY
TIME AT THE BALL.
WELL, I'LL SEE
YOU ALL AGAIN SOON.
THE-THE DASHING MR.
BROWN DROPPED IN AS BEFORE
TO HAVE TEA WITH MISS
SUSAN AND MISS PHOEBE.
MISS PHOEBE.
PHOEBE OF THE RINGLETS?
SHE-
SHE-
SHE DOESN'T-
WHAT A SHAME IT IS,
MISS SUSAN.
YES, IT IS A SHAME.
A BRAVE CAPTAIN BROWN.
GOOD AFTERNOON,
MISS SUSAN.
TELL ME,
WAS WATERLOO FUN?
FUN, MA'AM?
NOT FOR NAPOLEON.
LA, SIR.
HOW WITTY YOU ARE.
LA, CAPTAIN BROWN,
HOW BRAVE YOU ARE.
HE'LL BE DANCING
WITH CHARLOTTE PERRET.
MISS CHARLOTTE, YOU ARE
SELFISH AND SILLY,
BUT YOU ARE SWEET 18.
SUSAN, I HATE HIM.
OH, SUSAN,
I COULD HATE HIM IF-
MY DEAR.
HE THOUGHT I WAS OLD
BECAUSE I'M WEARY.
AND HOW'S
MISS PHOEBE?
ALL YOUR CHARM IS GONE
IF YOU HAVE THE HEADACHE
AND YOUR EYES
ARE TIRED.
BUT HE SHOULDN' HAVE FORGOTTEN.
I'M ONLY 30.
SUSAN, WHY DOES 30 SEEM
SO MUCH MORE THAN 29?
HE WOULD NOT DANCE
WITH HER.
CHARLOTTE PERRE IS A SILLY GOOSE.
'TIS WHAT GENTLEMEN
PREFER. IF THERE WERE
A SUFFICIENT NUMBER OF
GEESE TO GO AROUND, SUSAN,
NO WOMAN OF SENSE WOULD
EVER GET A HUSBAND.
IF TO BE LADY-LIKE-
I'M TIRED OF BEING
LADY-LIKE.
I WANT TO BE BRIGHT AND
THOUGHTLESS AND THE MERRY.
I WANT TO BE PETTED
AND ADMIRED.
ARE THESE 4 WALLS
THE WORLD, SUSAN,
OR IS THERE ANYTHING
BEYOND THEM?
10 YEARS AGO, I WEN TO BED A YOUNG GIRL,
AND I AWOKE WITH THIS CAP
ON MY HEAD. IT'S NOT FAIR.
PHOEBE, PHOEBE, YOU HAVE
ALWAYS BEEN SO PATIENT.
OH, NO. NOT ALWAYS.
YOU DON'T KNOW HOW
I'VE REBELLED AT TIMES.
SUSAN, I HAVE A PICTURE
OF MYSELF AS I USED TO BE.
I SOMETIMES
LOOK AT IT.
I SOMETIMES KISS I AND SAY,
"POOR GIRL, THEY'VE ALL
FORGOTTEN YOU, BUT I REMEMBER."
I DO NOT RECALL IT.
I KEEP IT LOCKED
AWAY IN MY ROOM.
WOULD YOU LIKE
TO SEE IT?
I SHALL BRING I DOWN TO YOU.
YOU STAND GAZING AT THE FOOLISH
CREATURES WHO CROWD TO A BALL.
I'M NOT, MUM. I'M GAZING
AT MY SWEETHEART.
YOUR SWEETHEART?
I DIDN'T KNOW
YOU HAD ONE.
NOT EVER, AYE, MUM,
AS YET.
BUT AT ANY MOMENT, HE
MAY TURN THE CORNER.
I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR HIM
TO OBLIGE THESE 15 YEARS.
15 YEARS
AND YOU'RE STILL HOPEFUL?
THERE'S NOT A MORE HOPEFUL WOMAN
IN ALL THE KINGS' DOMINIONS.
YOU ARE SO MUCH OLDER
THAN MISS PHOEBE.
YES, MA'AM. I HAVE THE
ADVANTAGE BY 10 YEARS.
IT WOULD BE IDLE TO PRETEND
THAT YOU ARE ESPECIALLY HANDSOME.
WELL, THAT MAY BE, MUM,
BUT MY FACE IS MY OWN.
THE MORE I SEE IT IN THE
GLASS, THE MORE IT PLEASES ME.
I NEVER LOOK AT IT,
BUT I SAY TO MYSELF,
"WHO'S TO BE
THE LUCKY MAN?"
'TIS WONDERFUL.
OH, THIS WILL BE A GREA YEAR FOR FEMALES, MUM.
THINK HOW MANY OF
THE MEN WHO MARCH
STRUTTING OFF TO THE WAR
TO HAVE COME BACK LIMPING.
WHO'S TO TAKE OFF
THEIR WOODEN LEGS
EVERY EVENING, MISS
SUSAN? YOU, MUM OR ME?
PATTY!
OR MISS PHOEBE, MUM?
THE PRETTY THING THA SHE WAS, MISS SUSAN.
DO YOU REMEMBER, PATTY?
AM I AS CHANGED
AS HE SAYS I AM?
YOU ALMOST FRIGHTEN ME.
ONE DANCE FOR
PHOEBE OF THE RINGLETS
THEN I SHALL PUT HER
AWAY IN A BOX
AND NEVER
LOOK AT HER AGAIN.
WILL YOU CELEBRATE
WATERLOO, MUM?
MISS PHOEBE!
NOT MISS PHOEBE, PATTY.
I'M NOT MYSELF TONIGHT.
I AM, LET ME SEE,
I AM MY NIECE.
MISS SUSAN, IT'S CAPTAIN
BROWN. HE'S AT THE DOOR.
PATTY, WAIT!
STOP!
IT'S CAPTAIN BROWN.
I VENTURED TO COME BACK
BECAUSE I-
I BEG YOUR PARDON, MA'AM. I THOUGH IT WAS MISS SUSAN OR MISS PHOEBE.
'TIS MY MISTRESS'
NIECE, SIR.
SHE'S ON A VISI HERE.
OH, PATTY, I OBTAINED THIS AT THE
APOTHECARY FOR MISS PHOEBE'S HEADACHE.
IT SHOULD BE TAKEN
AT ONCE.
MISS PHOEBE'S
LIED DOWN, SIR.
PATTY, TAKE I TO AUNT PHOEBE AT ONCE.
YES, MA'AM.
PERHAPS I MAY VENTURE TO
INTRODUCE MYSELF, MISS, UH?
MISS, UH, LIVVY,
SIR.
I'M CAPTAIN BROWN,
MISS LIVVY.
AN OLD FRIEND
OF BOTH YOUR AUNTS.
OH! I HEARD THEM SPEAK
OF A DASHING MR. BROWN,
BUT I THINK I CANNOT BE THE SAME.
WHY NOT, MA'AM?
I BEG YOUR PARDON.
I WAS SURE
YOU MUST BE RELATED.
FOR A MOMENT,
THE LIKENESS-
LA, SIR. YOU MEAN
I'M LIKE AUNT PHOEBE?
EVERYONE SAYS SO, AND
INDEED, THERE'S NO COMPLIMENT.
IT WOULD HAVE BEEN
A COMPLIMENT ONCE.
MISS LIVVY, ARE YOU
GOING TO THE BALL?
ALAS, SIR,
I HAVE NO CARD.
I HAVE 2 CARDS
FOR YOUR AUNTS.
AND SINCE MISS PHOEBE
HAS A HEADACHE,
MISS SUSAN MUS TAKE YOU TO THE BALL.
OH, DO YOU THINK, SIR,
THAT SOME HANDSOME GENTLEMAN
MIGHT BE PARTIAL
TO ME AT THE BALL?
IF THAT'S YOUR WISH.
I SHOULD LOVE, SIR,
TO INSPIRE FRENZY
IN THE REST OF THE MALE.
OH, I DARE NOT GO.
I CANNOT GO.
LOOK, MISS LIVVY.
OH, MISS SUSAN.
I VENTURED TO INTRODUCE
MYSELF TO YOUR CHARMING NIECE.
AUNT SUSAN, DO NOT BE
ANGRY WITH YOUR LIVVY.
YOUR LIVVY, AUNT SUSAN.
THIS GENTLEMAN SAYS THA HE IS THE DASHING MR. BROWN,
AND THAT HE HAS CARDS FOR US
TO GO TO THE BALL.
OF COURSE, WE CANNOT GO.
WE DARE NOT GO.
OH, AUNTIE,
HASTEN INTO YOUR BOMBAZINE.
PHOEBE!
AUNT PHOEBE
WANTS ME TO GO.
IF I SAY SHE DOES,
YOU KNOW SHE DOES.
I SHALL SEE TO IT,
MISS SUSAN,
THAT YOUR NIECE
HAS A CHARMING EVENING.
HE MEANS THAT HE WILL
FIND ME CHARMING PARTNERS.
NO, MA'AM. I MEAN
I'LL BE YOUR PARTNER.
AUNT SUSAN,
HE STILL DANCES.
STILL, MA'AM?
PRAY NOT TO SCOWL.
I COULD NOT AVOID
NOTICING THEM.
NOTICING WHAT,
MISS LIVVY?
THE, UM, GRAY HAIRS, SIR.
COME ON, SUSAN.
THINK, MY DEAR, THINK.
WE DARE NOT!
NO, NO, WE DARE NOT.
WE CANNOT GO.
INDEED, MA'AM.
IT IS IMPOSSIBLE.
WHERE'S MY CLOAK?
'TIS BUT A NEW VEIL, SIR.
THERE'S NO CAUSE FOR ALARM.
MARY, SURELY IT ISN' THE GALLANT CAPTAIN BROWN.
OH, HOW DO YOU DO,
MY DEAR LADIES.
WELCOME BACK, SIR.
WE'RE VERY HAPPY
TO SEE YOU AGAIN, SIR.
AND HAVE YOU SEEN
MISS PHOEBE?
I'VE HAD THE HONOR.
I REGRET TO SAY
THAT MISS PHOEBE
IS LYING DOWN NOW
WITH A HEADACHE.
A HEADACHE?
HMM. MORE LIKELY
HEARTACHE.
YOU DON'T FAVOR THE BALL
TONIGHT?
WE NEVER ATTEND
THEM, SIR.
WE SHOULD PROBABLY SPEND
THE EVENING HERE
WITH MISS SUSAN
AT THE CARD TABLE.
MISS SUSAN'S GOING
TO THE BALL WITH ME.
OH, I HOPE
THERE'S NO IMPROPRIETY.
MISS LIVVY
WILL ACCOMPANY HER.
MISS LIVVY?
THEIR VERY CHARMING
NIECE.
NIECE?
THEY HAD NOT TOLD US
THAT THEY HAD A VISITOR.
WE'RE GOING TO THE BALL.
OH, I SEE.
I, UH, CANNOT REMEMBER,
SUSAN,
THAT YOUR ESTIMABLE
BROTHER HAD A DAUGHTER.
I THOUGHT, UH,
ALL THE 3 WERE SONS.
3 SONS
AND A DAUGHTER.
WELL, SURELY YOU REMEMBER
LITTLE LIVVY, MARY?
NO, SUSAN, I DO NOT.
OH, WELL, I MUST GO.
AH, HERE'S MISS LIVVY.
THIS IS MY NIECE
MISS LIVVY.
MISS WILLOUGHBY, MISS HENRIETTA,
AND MISS BETTY WILLOUGHBY.
3 SONS AND A DAUGHTER.
MAY I ASK, MISS LIVVY, HOW
MANY BROTHERS DO YOU HAVE?
2!
I THANK YOU.
EXCLUDING
THE UNHAPPY THOMAS.
WE NEVER MENTION
HIM.
LADIES,
PARDON MY IMPATIENCE.
WHAT HAS THOMAS DONE?
PHOEBE,
IT'S YOUNG BLADES.
OH, MY HEART.
LET US ESCAPE AT ONCE.
SUSAN, DON'T BUDGE.
MISS SUSAN,
ONCE YOUR PUPIL
AND NOW YOUR MOS OBEDIENT, MA'AM.
MR. BLADES, I BELIEVE.
I HARDLY EXPECTED
TO FIND YOU AT THE BALL.
I SCARCELY EXPECTED I MYSELF.
I DO NOT SEE
MISS PHOEBE WITH YOU.
DON'T YOU?
AUNTIE, WHY DON'T YOU
PRESENT YOUR OLD PUPIL?
ENSIGN BLADES,
MY NIECE MISS OLIVIA CROSSEL.
LIEUTENANT SWITZER.
BLAKE, 50th AT ARMS.
DAVIS WITH THE 109th.
OH!
UH, MAY I HAVE THE HONOR?
OH, AUNTIE, I SHOULD SO
ENJOY DANCING WITH AN ENSIGN.
HOW MUCH MORE THAN
DANCING WITH A LIEUTENANT?
WHY DON'T YOU TWO OLD FRIENDS
PLAY A HAND OF CRIBBAGE?
AND WE'LL GO OVER
TO MAKE MERRY
AND WHEN WE'RE THERE,
WE'LL DRINK THE SHERRY
WHEN TOGETHER
WE'RE SO GAY
ABOARD THE BOAT,
ACROSS THE PRAIRIE
WHEN TOGETHER WE'RE SO...
BEAUTIFULLY DONE!
AND WERE YOU REALLY
FRIGHTENED BY THEM, BLADES?
FRIGHTENED BY THEM?
OH, HOW BRAVE YOU ARE.
WELL, WE MARCHED ON
THAT NIGHT-
AND THEN?
YOURS?
NO, UH-
MINE.
OH.
I MISSED YOU...
ON PURPOSE.
YOU?
I MISSED YOU.
ON PURPOSE?
CHARMING,
LIEUTENANT SWITZER.
THE, UH, FIELD
IS YOURS, SIR.
RAIN! WE'LL GET WET!
YOU'RE AN AMAZINGLY
PRETTY GIRL, MA'AM,
BUT A SHOCKING FLIRT.
LA.
I SUPPOSE I AMUSES YOU
TO SEE THEM GO
DOWN BEFORE YOU.
BUT I KNOW YOU HAVE
A KIND HEART.
THANK YOU, SIR.
YOU DON'T SEEM TO CARE WITH
WHOSE AFFECTIONS YOU TRIFLE.
LA, SO, WHY SHOULD I CARE?
I'LL TELL YOU WHY.
I MUST GO HOME.
IN THE RAIN?
YES. YES. I JUST REMEMBERED
AUNT PHOEBE IS ILL.
ILL? I THOUGHT HER
IMPROVED.
NO, SHE'S WORSE.
IT'S NOT SO BAD THAT YOU
MUST RISK YOUR OWN HEALTH.
OH, YES.
YES, INDEED.
SHE'S-SHE'S
DESPERATELY ILL.
GOOD HEAVENS! WHY WASN'T HER DOCTOR
TOLD? I SHALL GO TO HER AT ONCE.
NO.
YOU STAY HERE.
YES, SIR.
I HOPE, MISS SUSAN, TO EVENTUALLY
MEET YOUR CHARMING NIECE.
YES. YES. IT'S, UH,
UNFORTUNATE THAT YOU MISSED HER.
SO AWFUL.
HOW WONDERFUL TO BE AS
SOUGHT AFTER AS MISS LIVVY.
AH, THE INCOMPARABLE
MISS LIVVY.
AH, THE INVISIBLE MISS LIVVY
IS MORE LIKELY TO BE HERE
AND YE NOT TO BE HERE.
PERHAPS NEXT TIME MISS
LIVVY WILL BE AT HOME.
PERHAPS.
AH-CHOO!
AH-CHOO!
IT'S TOO MUCH FOR ME,
PHOEBE.
I'M SURE OUR FRIENDS
SUSPECT.
HURRY, MY NIGHTGOWN,
HE'LL BE HERE IN A MOMENT.
OH, PHOEBE,
FOR MY SAKE,
LET US SEND MISS LIVVY BACK TO
HER FATHER WHILE THERE IS YET TIME.
HURRY, SUSAN, HURRY.
FOREGO THE BALL TONIGHT.
I WILL.
I PROMISE I WILL.
SHE'S UPSTAIRS.
MISS PHOEBE!
MISS SUSAN!
IT'S CAPTAIN BROWN.
HURRY, SUSAN.
RECEIVE HIM!
OH, IT'S SO TERRIFYING.
IF THEY SHOULD FIND OUT,
WE DARE NOT OPEN THE SCHOOL.
WHAT A SCANDAL
IT WOULD BE.
WE CAN STARVE.
CAPTAIN BROWN HAS COME
TO SEE YOU, MY DEAR.
OH, I'M SORRY.
OH!
I'M SORRY TO FIND
YOU NO BETTER.
HAVE YOU A HEADACHE?
NO.
HAVE YOU HAD THE CHILL?
NO.
WHAT DO YOU THINK
CAUSES THIS WEAKNESS?
A FEVER.
AH-CHOO.
A COLD!
IT'S MISS LIVVY.
MISS LIVVY'S VISIT HAS
TURNED OUR LIVES UPSIDE-DOWN.
NOT ONLY YOURS, MA'AM.
WHAT MEAN YOU, SIR?
OH, NO MATTER. I'LL HAVE THE
APOTHECARY SEND YOU A TONIC.
AND WOULD YOU APOLOGIZE
TO MISS LIVVY
FOR MY LEAVING HER ALONE
THIS AFTERNOON?
IF WHAT SHE TELLS US
IS THE TRUTH, SIR,
SHE IS INVARIABLY
WELL ATTENDED.
I THINK SHE CAN
SPARE YOU, SIR.
INDEED.
HOW THEY SPOIL HER.
I'M AFRAID THEY DO.
DO YOU THINK, UH,
SHE IS PERHAPS TOO BRAZEN?
SHE'S YOUNG.
YES. YES, SHE IS.
WELL, HOWEVER THAT MAY BE,
I SHALL BE HERE AT 9:00
TO TAKE HER TO THE BALL.
BUT MISS LIVVY GOES
NOT TO THE BALL.
I WAS NOT AWARE THERE WAS
ANY CHANGE IN PLAN.
NOR IS THERE, SUSAN?
MISS LIVVY
WILL ACCOMPANY YOU, SIR.
YOU'RE MOST OBEDIENT,
MA'AM.
I HOPE TO FIND YOU
MUCH IMPROVED WHEN I RETURN.
OH, VALENTINE BROWN,
HOW COULD YOU?
PHOEBE!
TOO WEARY OF PHOEBE.
PATIENT, LADY-LIKE PHOEBE.
AND BECOME ENAMORED
IN A NIGH OF THAT HORRID,
FORWARD, FLIRTING,
HEARTLESS, HATEFUL,
LITTLE TOAD OF A LIVVY.
WELL, PHOEBE, YOU PROMISED
ME NOT TO GO TO THE BALL.
MISS LIVVY
MUST GO TO THE BALL.
THERE'S BEEN A DECLARATION
IN HIS EYES ALL THIS WEEK
AND TONIGHT I MEAN
TO BRING HIM TO IT.
AND WHEN HE CRIES, "ADORABLE,
MISS LIVVY, BE MINE!"
I INTEND TO ANSWER
WITH A LA, CAPTAIN BROWN,
HOW RIDICULOUS YOU ARE.
YOU'RE MUCH TOO OLD. HA!
PHOEBE, HOW CAN YOU
BE SO CRUEL?
HOW DO I LOOK?
PLEASE TO REMEMBER, WE'RE NO BENT ON PLEASURE, HENRIETTA.
OUR ATTENDANCE AT THE BALL
IS THE PERFORMANCE OF A DUTY.
A DUTY TO QUALITY STREET.
PERHAPS A GOOD LOOK AT THE GAY
MISS LIVVY WILL SOLVE THIS MYSTERY.
BUT, MARY, DO WE DARE?
WE DO.
DEAR MISS LIVVY,
THE MOON IS SO LOVELY,
WILL YOU STROLL
AND LET ME SHOW YOU?
SIR! BUT, MA'AM, IS
NOT THE NEXT DANCE MINE?
OH, BUT I'M SO FOND
OF THE DEAR MOON.
I'LL BE VERY PLEASED
TO POINT IT OUT TO YOU.
BUT, SIR,
THIS IS UNENDURABLE.
MAY I SOLICI OF YOU, MISS LIVVY?
IS CAPTAIN BROWN
YOUR GUARDIAN?
ARE YOU AFFIANCED TO HIM?
OH, SIR, YOU MUS NOT ASK THAT OF ME.
BY WHAT RIGHT, SIR,
DO YOU INTERFERE?
BY A RIGHT I HOPE TO
MAKE CLEAR TO MISS LIVVY.
AS SOON AS WE'RE ALONE.
GLORY BE, IF IT AIN' THE RECRUITING SERGEANT.
BLESS MY SOUL. CAN IT REALLY BE
- NOW, DON'T TELL ME.
NOW, DON'T TELL ME. I'LL
THINK OF THE NAME IN A MOMENT.
HA HA, I KNOW IT STARTS
WITH A "P".
YES, NOW, UH,
WOULD IT BE-
DO YOU KNOW MISS PHOEBE?
PHOEBE!
THAT'S RIGHT, PHOEBE!
WELL, HOW ARE YOU?
COMING SO FAR, MON PETITE.
I'M NOT MISS PHOEBE. I'M LOOKING
FOR MISS PHOEBE, MY MISTRESS.
OH, WELL, LET ME TELL
YOU THIS, MON PETITE,
YOU CAN'T GO IN THERE
WITHOUT A CARD YOU KNOW.
THEN YOU GO ON IN THERE
AND TELL MISS PHOEBE
THAT THE WILLOUGHBYS
ARE ON THEIR WAY HERE.
THEY'RE COMING TO SEE
MISS LIVVY,
SO SHE'D BETTER GO HOME
AT ONCE.
WHO, MISS LIVVY?
NO, MISS PHOEBE.
THERE AIN'T NO MISS LIVVY.
YEAH, BUT YOU JUS TOLD ME
THEY WERE COMING
TO SEE MISS LIVVY.
THEY THINK MISS LIVVY
IS MISS PHOEBE.
HOW SILLY. HOW CAN THEY
POSSIBLY THINK THAT?
BECAUSE SHE IS MISS PHOEBE.
WHO IS?
MISS OLIVIA.
OH, YEAH.
OH, HERE THEY ARE.
COME ON.
PATTY!
THE WILLOUGHBYS, MA'AM,
ARE ON THEIR WAY HERE.
THE WILLOUGHBYS!
YES, MA'AM.
SEE, MISS LIVVY.
MISS SUSAN.
I FEEL ILL. FAINT.
ENSIGN BLADES, CORDIAL, IF YOU PLEASE.
YES. YES, OF COURSE.
MISS LIVVIE...
YES, MR. BROWN.
THERE'S SOMETHING
I MUST SAY TO YOU.
REALLY?
WHAT?
OH, TH-THERE YOU ARE.
I- I-I-I FEEL ILL.
FAINT.
CAPTAIN BROWN, A CORDIAL
IF YOU PLEASE.
IMMEDIATELY, MA'AM.
THANK YOU.
OH, SUSAN, HE WAS
JUST ABOUT TO OFFER.
PHOEBE, THEY'RE HERE.
THEY'RE HERE.
WHO'S HERE?
THE WILLOUGHBYS
AND MISS HENRIETTA.
GOOD HEAVENS.
WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO?
WE MUST LEAVE AT ONCE.
WHERE IS YOUR CLOAK?
IN THE RETIRING ROOM.
THEY'VE PROBABLY
RETURNED INDOORS.
THERE THEY ARE.
ARE YOU SURE?
OF COURSE, MARY.
'TIS LIVVIE.
IT'S THE CLOAK AND BONNE SHE WORE TO THE FIRST BALL.
HOW ATTENTIVE
CAPTAIN BROWN IS.
DO WE DARE
INTERRUPT THEM?
WE DO.
I THINK I'VE KNOWN
THE YOUNG LADY LONG ENOUGH
TO ALLOW MYSELF
THAT LIBERTY.
PHOEBE!
YES, M-MARY.
HOW DO YOU DO?
YOUR CORDIAL,
MISS SUSAN.
OH. THANK YOU.
ANOTHER,
IF-IF YOU PLEASE.
AT ONCE, MA'AM.
MISS SUSAN?
THANK YOU.
THERE YOU ARE.
OH. GET ME ONE,
TOO.
YOU'RE MISS PHOEBE?
YES, MARY,
I AM PHOEBE.
AMAZING.
MISS PHOEBE, WE'VE
DONE YOU A CRUEL WRONG.
WE'VE NEVER REALLY
MET HER.
NEVER SEEN HER
TOGETHER WITH YOU.
SO WE WERE CONVINCED
THERE WAS NO SUCH PERSON.
AND OF COURSE WE THOUGH IT MUST BE YOU.
I CAN STILL SEE HER
IN THE GARDEN.
OH.
OH, YOU-YOU-YOU
MEAN, HENRIETTA,
YOU MEAN, MARY,
THAT-THAT I-
IT WAS WICKED OF US,
I KNOW,
BUT WE THOUGHT THAT YOU
AND MISS LIVVIE
WERE THE SAME PERSON.
OH, HOW COULD YOU?
OH...
OH, DO FORGIVE US,
PHOEBE, DEAR.
WE COULD NOT HELP
SUSPECTING.
WE BEG YOUR PARDON.
OH.
PHOEBE, YOU LOOK
SO PRETTY.
ARE THEY PAYING YOU
NO ATTENTIONS, MY DEAR?
ALAS, NO. THEY...
THEY THINK OF NONE,
BUT, UH, LIVVIE.
AND CAPTAIN BROWN?
HE IS INFATUATED
WITH HER.
OH, PHOEBE.
PARDON ME.
OH, CAPTAIN BROWN,
YOU LEFT MISS LIVVIE.
AH, BUT, MA'AM,
I RETURN TO HER.
THAT'S A MISTAKE, SIR.
I WAS JUST THINKING
THAT IF I WERE A GENTLEMAN,
I SHOULD PAY MY ADDRESSES TO MISS
PHOEBE MUCH RATHER THAN TO HER NIECE.
YOU EMBARRASS ME.
ME ALSO, MA'AM.
YOU SEE, I HAVE SOMETHING VERY IMPORTAN TO SAY
TO MISS LIVVIE.
OH.
IN THAT CASE, SIR,
WE SHAN'T DELAY YOU
ANY FURTHER.
THANK YOU, MA'AM.
GOOD EVENING.
GOOD EVENING, MARY.
GOOD EVENING, FANNIE.
GOOD EVENING.
SUSAN, I SHALL
CALL TOMORROW.
I DO SO WISH TO KNOW
MISS LIVVIE BETTER.
AUNTIE...
YOU REMEMBER THA CAPTAIN BROWN SAID
THAT HE HAD SOMETHING OF
IMPORTANCE TO SAY TO ME?
OH, INDEED.
EXCUSE ME.
YES, MR. BROWN?
MISS LIVVIE,
NO DOUBT THESE VARYING
FLIRTATIONS AMUSE YOU.
HAS IT NEVER
OCCURRED TO YOU
THAT THEY MAY
HURT OTHERS?
REALLY, SIR?
WHOM?
OH, THE BLADES AND THE LIKE
MAY NOT SUFFER TOO MUCH...
BUT ONE MAY PERHAPS.
PERHAPS I MAY WISH
TO SEE HIM SQUIRM.
FOR SHAME,
MISS LIVVIE.
I SPEAK IN THE INTERESTS
OF THE MAN
TO WHOM I HOPE
TO SEE YOU BETROTHED.
AND WHO IS
THIS HAPPY MAN?
AS TO WHO HE IS,
I HAVE NO IDEA.
NOR, I AM SURE,
HAVE YOU.
OTHERWISE YOU'D BE MORE
GUARDED IN YOUR CONDUCT.
BUT SOMEDAY,
MISS LIVVIE,
THE RIGHT MAN
WILL COME.
AND HOW WILL YOU EXPLAIN
AWAY YOUR PRESENT BEHAVIOR?
HIS FACE WOULD CHANGE
AS YOU TOLD HIM OF IT.
AND YOURS WOULD BE A FALSE
FACE UNTIL IT WAS TOLD.
I SEE.
YOU WILL SEE...
WHEN YOU KNOW
WHAT LOVE REALLY IS.
LOVE.
WHAT DO YOU KNOW
OF LOVE?
WHY, I KNOW
ALL ABOUT IT.
I'M IN LOVE,
MISS LIVVIE.
I WISH YOU HAPPY.
THE LADY WAS ONCE
VERY MUCH LIKE YOU.
NOT...
OH, NO.
YES, MISS LIVVIE,
IT'S YOUR AUNT PHOEBE
WHOM I LOVE.
YOU REALLY MEAN PHOEBE?
TIRED,
UNATTRACTIVE PHOEBE?
PHOEBE WHO WAS ONCE MORE
FASCINATING THAN YOU, MA'AM.
OH, YOU BEWITCHED ME,
YOU WHO SO RESEMBLED HER
AS SHE WAS.
BUT IT WAS ONLY FOR AN HOUR.
HOW LIKE
I THOUGHT AT FIRST,
BUT SOON IT WAS
HOW UNLIKE.
I REMEMBER I ONCE
COMPARED HER TO A GARDEN.
I'VE OFTEN
THOUGHT OF THAT.
OH, MISS LIVVIE, DO YOU
THINK THERE'S ANY HOPE FOR ME?
THERE WAS A MAN
WHO MISS PHOEBE LOVED...
BUT THAT WAS LONG AGO.
HE DIDN'T LOVE HER.
NOW, THERE WAS A FOOL.
IT WAS YOU.
YOU KISSED HER ONCE.
IT WAS RAINING,
AND HER FACE WAS WET.
YOU SAID YOU DID I BECAUSE HER FACE WAS WET.
I HAD QUITE FORGOTTEN.
NOW I'M LAUGHING
AT BOTH OF YOU.
PHOEBE-THAT OLD THING.
MISS LIVVIE...
HA HA.
I HATE HER
AND DESPISE HER.
IF YOU KNEW
WHAT SHE IS-
I KNOW
WHAT YOU ARE.
THAT GARDEN-
SILENCE!
YOUR GARDEN
HAS BEEN DESTROYED, SIR.
THE WEEDS HAVE ENTERED IT,
AND ALL THE FLOWERS ARE CHOKED.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
I CANNOT TELL YOU.
IT IS TOO HORRIBLE.
YOU'RE TOO HORRIBLE.
ISN'T THAT IT?
YES, THAT'S IT.
WHAT IS TOO HORRIBLE?
MA'AM, I'LL LEAVE THE TELLING
OF IT TO HER IF SHE DARE.
BUT I DEVOUTLY HOPE
THOSE ARE THE LAST WORDS
I SHALL EVER ADDRESS
TO THIS LADY.
MY LOVE, MY DEAR,
WHAT TERRIBLE THING
HAS HE SAID TO YOU?
NOT-NOT TERRIBLE...
GLORIOUS!
SUSAN, 'TIS PHOEBE
HE LOVES, NOT LIVVIE.
HE LOVES ME-PHOEBE!
OHH, SUSAN,
HE LOVES ME.
OH,
LOVELY RAMBLIN' ROSES
THE GARDEN WALL ATOP
YOUR FRAGRANCE RARE
CANNOT COMPARE
TO A FRYING...
MUTTON CHOP
AHH!
FOR YOU, VIDEL.
IT MAY INVOLVE
A DETOUR,
BUT IT'S STILL
THE BEST ROUTE.
WHAT ARE YOU
TALKING ABOUT?
THE WAY TO A MAN'S HEAR IS THROUGH HIS STOMACH.
AND, TO MAKE A PERSONAL
OBSERVATION OF MY OWN,
THE WAY
TO A MAN'S STOMACH
IS THROUGH-
NOT FOR YOU.
THAT'S FOR MISS SUSAN
AND MISS PHOEBE.
YEAH, BUT YOU TOLD ME
THERE AIN'T NO MISS PHOEBE.
ONCE AND FOR ALL
AND FOR THE LAST TIME,
THERE AIN' NO MISS LIVVIE.
GOOD MORNING,
PHOEBE, MY LOVE.
YOU DID NOT SLEEP?
NOT A WINK.
IF YOU HAVE
SUCH REMORSE,
YOU WILL WEEP YOURSELF TO DEATH.
AFTER WHAT HE SAID
TO ME LAST NIGHT...
WHAT ELSE CAN I DO?
YOU MUST GET RID
OF LIVVIE.
THAT IS CERTAIN.
WHEN OUR FRIENDS CALL
THIS AFTERNOON,
I'LL SAY THA SHE'S RETURNED HOME.
YES.
GOOD MORNING, SUSAN.
YOU WILL PARDON MY INTRUSION
SO EARLY IN THE DAY,
BUT, UH, BEING AWARE OF MISS
LIVVIE'S EXTREME POPULARITY,
I THOUGHT TO CALL ON HER
BEFORE SHE WENT OUT.
OH.
POOR LIVVIE IS ILL.
YES.
ILL? HOW SUDDEN.
QUITE.
SHE WAS AWAKE
ALL NIGHT...
TREMBLINGS,
FLUTTERINGS, SPASMS.
INDEED?
THE EXCITEMENT,
UH, THE BALL.
HMM.
MAY I GO IN
AND SEE HER?
I'M AFRAID NOT.
YOU KNOW,
LIVVIE MUST BE ALMOST ASLEEP AT LAST.
THAT'S FOR MISS LIVVIE.
LIE STILL,
LIVVIE, MY LOVE.
LIE STILL.
BREAKFAST.
MISS LIVVIE'S BREAKFAST.
YOURS IS GETTING COLD,
MA'AM.
GOOD MORNING, LADIES.
I SHALL BE AT HOME
ALL DAY.
DO LET ME KNOW WHEN MISS
LIVVIE IS IMPROVED ENOUGH
TO RECEIVE ME.
WHAT'S TO BE DONE?
SHE WILL NEVER LE LIVVIE ESCAPE.
PHOEBE, I FEEL AS IF MISS
LIVVIE REALLY EXISTED.
WE SHALL NEVER BE ABLE
TO ESTEEM OURSELVES AGAIN.
IF HE PROPOSES,
WHY NOT MARRY HIM?
IF WE CAN MAKE HIM THINK
THAT SHE'S GONE HOME,
HE NEED NEVER KNOW.
SUSAN...
YOU PAIN ME.
SHE WHO MARRIES
WITHOUT TELLING ALL,
HERS MUST EVER BE
A FALSE FACE.
THEY WERE
HIS OWN WORDS.
PATTY,
'TIS CAPTAIN BROWN.
TELL HIM I'VE GONE OUT.
GOOD MORNING, PATTY.
IS MISS PHOEBE IN?
NO, SIR.
SHE'S GONE OUT.
INTO THE GARDEN.
AHA.
MISS PHOEBE?
WHAT IS IT, SIR?
SURELY YOU'RE
NOT AFRAID OF ME?
NO.
NO.
WHY SHOULD I BE?
NO REASON
THAT I KNOW.
MISS PHOEBE, YOU TOLD MISS
LIVVIE THAT YOU LOVED ME ONCE.
YOU KEPT IT CAREFULLY HIDDEN FROM ME.
A WOMAN MUST NEVER TELL,
SIR.
YOU WEN TO THE GREAT BATTLES.
I WAS LEFT TO FIGH IN A LITTLE ONE.
WOMEN HAVE A FLAG TO FLY
AS WELL AS MEN, MR. BROWN.
AND... OLD MAIDS HAVE A FLAG
AS WELL AS WOMEN.
I... TRIED
TO KEEP MINE FLYING.
I DARE NOT ASK YOU
TO LOVE,
BUT I DO ASK YOU TO PU YOURSELF IN MY KEEPING.
LET ME TAKE CARE OF YOU.
IT CANNOT BE.
IF NOT FOR YOUR SAKE,
DO IT FOR MINE.
THEY SAY A LADY
CAN NEVER QUITE FORGE THE MAN
WHO'S USED HER ILL.
DO IT FOR ME
BECAUSE I USED YOU ILL.
PLEASE TO SAY
NO MORE.
GOOD MORNING,
PATTY.
PATTY.
WELL,
WHERE'S MISS MARY?
SHE HAS NOT BEEN TO
SEE US FOR 5 MINUTES.
HOW DO YOU DO, SIR?
AND HOW DO YOU FIND
MISS LIVVIE TODAY, SIR?
I HAVEN'T SEEN HER, MA'AM.
INDEED?
WHY SURELY, PHOEBE,
WHEN SHE'S ILL,
THERE'S DOUBLE REASON
FOR-
ILL?
I HADN'T HEARD.
LADIES, HAVE PITY ON
A DULL MALE AND EXPLAIN.
I UNDERSTAND, SIR,
THAT THERE IS A BELIEF
THAT I KEEP MISS LIVVIE IN CONFINEMEN BECAUSE OF YOUR PASSION FOR HER.
MY PASSION
FOR MISS LIVVIE?
WHY, I CAN'T ABIDE HER OR SHE ME.
FURTHERMORE,
I'M PROUD TO TELL YOU
THAT THIS IS THE LADY
I LOVE.
WHAT?
PHOEBE?
YES, MA'AM.
OH...
PHOEBE...
I'M SO HAPPY IT'S YOU.
OH, PHOEBE, DEAR,
I WISH YOU JOY.
AND YOU ALSO, SIR.
BUT, SUSAN, I, UH...
WELL, REALLY.
I DON'T UNDERSTAND.
IS IT THAT MISS LIVVIE
IS AN OBSTACLE?
MISS LIVVIE AN OBSTACLE?
IS THERE SOME MYSTERY
ABOUT THE YOUNG LADY?
SO MUCH SO, SIR,
THAT WE AT ONE TIME
THOUGHT THAT SHE
AND MISS PHOEBE
WERE THE SAME PERSON.
WE'VE NEVER EVEN SEEN
HER FACE.
INDEED?
HOW DO YOU FIND YOURSELF,
DEAR MISS LIVVIE?
IF YOU MUST KNOW,
LADIES...
SHE FINDS HERSELF TOO
ILL TO SEE VISITORS.
TOO ILL
TO SEE ANYONE.
IN THAT CASE, PATTY, I THINK
SHE SHOULD SEE A PHYSICIAN.
IS SHE VERY POORLY,
SIR?
WE DID NOT HEAR YOU
ADDRESS HER.
SHE'S NOT AWAKE, MA'AM.
IT'S NOT A VERY SERIOUS ILLNESS,
I THINK.
WE MUSTN'T TALK,
LEST WE DISTURB HER.
IN FACT, I THINK
YOU'D ALL BETTER GO.
PATTY,
HAVE THEY GONE YET?!
SHH!
NO, SUSAN,
BUT WE ARE GOING.
OH...
MISS PHOEBE, I DESIRE
TO SEE MISS LIVVIE.
IMPOSSIBLE.
WHY IMPOSSIBLE?
THEY TELL ME STRANGE
TALES OF NO ONE SEEING HER.
GO AT ONCE AND TELL MISS
LIVVIE THAT I MUST SEE HER.
YES, SIR.
PATTY...
OH, HOW DO YOU DO,
SIR?
WELL, IT CERTAINLY IS A PLEAS
- GOOD MORNING, SERGEANT.
AT EASE.
PATTY, WHY IS THIS TRICK
BEING PLAYED UPON ME?
UPON YOU, TOO, SIR?
HA HA.
WELL, I NEVER.
AT EASE, SERGEANT.
EXPLAIN, PATTY.
I DON'T KNOW
WHAT YOU MEAN, SIR.
PATTY, I KNOW
THERE'S NO MISS LIVVIE.
BUT MISS PHOEBE HAS BEEN
IMPERSONATING HER.
AND IF SHE HAS?
WHY HAS SHE DONE THIS?
IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT,
SIR.
MY FAULT?
IT WAS YOU
WHO STARTED IT,
ALL BY NOT KNOWING HER
WHEN YOU FIRST RETURNED.
INDEED?
EVERYTHING'S
YOUR FAULT, SIR,
AND IT'S TIME
YOU KNEW IT.
TELL ME, WHY DON'T THEY
SAY MISS LIVVIE'S GONE HOME?
IT WOULD SAVE THEM
A WORLD OF TROUBLE.
THE WILLOUGHBYS WATCH
THE HOUSE ALL THE TIME.
THEY WOULD SAY,
"SHE CANNOT HAVE GONE,
FOR WE HAVE NO SEEN HER GO."
I SEE.
MISS LIVVIE IS
GREATLY IMPROVED, SIR,
AND HAS CONSENTED TO COME IN TO SEE YOU.
YOUR SERVANT,
MISS LIVVIE.
HOW DO YOU DO, SIR?
AND, UH, ISN'T MISS PHOEBE
TO JOIN US?
UH, SHE-SHE...
SHE'S TAKING THE OPPORTUNITY
OF AIRING THE ROOM.
AHH!
OF COURSE.
CAPTAIN BROWN
WILL EXCUSE YOU, PHOEBE.
CERTAINLY,
MISS SUSAN.
ALLOW ME.
SHE'LL RECOVER.
IN FACT, MA'AM, I THINK
I COULD CURE MISS LIVVIE...
IF SHE'S PUT UNRESERVEDLY IN MY HANDS.
WELL,
I'M SURE YOU COULD.
THEN YOU'RE MY PATIENT, MISS LIVVIE.
OH.
HOME'S THE PLACE
FOR YOU.
YES.
WOULD THA I COULD GO THERE.
YOU ARE GOING.
YES. SOON, SIR.
INDEED, I HAVE A DELIGHTFUL
SURPRISE FOR YOU, MISS LIVVIE.
YOU'RE GOING TODAY.
TODAY?
NOT MERELY TODAY,
BUT NOW.
COME, MISS SUSAN,
SOME WRAPS FOR HER.
OH, BUT, SIR,
I DECLINE TO GO.
NO, MISS LIVVIE.
YOU'RE IN MY HANDS.
BUT, SIR-
WE MUSTN'T HUMOR HER,
MISS SUSAN. THE WRAPS.
AUNTIE,
DON'T LEAVE ME.
WHAT A DIFFICULT PATIEN IT IS.
WILL YOU REASON WITH HER,
MISS SUSAN?
I SHALL ASK MISS PHOEBE
FOR SOME WRAPS.
WELL, HOW DO YOU DO,
MISS PHOEBE?
LIVVIE.
I THINK THESE WILL DO
ADMIRABLY, MISS SUSAN.
BUT...
PHOEBE?
SHE'S STILL BUSY
AIRING THE ROOM.
COME ALONG, SERGEANT.
PATTY, GET YOUR CLOAK
AND BONNET.
WE'RE TAKING
MISS LIVVIE HOME.
YES, SIR.
AHH, MISS LIVVIE.
ALLOW ME
TO PUT THESE ROUND YOU.
TAKE HOLD HERE, SERGEANT,
WILL YOU?
YES, SIR.
HA HA.
MAY I, UH...
MAY I ASK, SIR,
WHERE SHE IS?
HERE.
THEN, SIR,
MIGHT I ASK
WHO IS SHE?
MISS LIVVIE, SERGEANT.
THANK YOU.
OH. HOW DO YOU DO,
MA'AM?
NOW, SERGEANT, WILL YOU
TAKE CARE OF THAT LEFT ELBOW?
THE-OH, THE LEFT-
OH, THE LEFT ELBOW.
OH, YES, SIR.
YES, SIR.
NOW COME ALONG,
MISS LIVVIE.
DON'T BE AFRAID.
OUR ARMS
ARE AROUND YOU.
THERE. BE BRAVE.
GOOD-BYE, MISS SUSAN.
WE'LL TAKE
EVERY CARE OF HER.
GENTLY, SERGEANT,
GENTLY.
YES, SIR.
SUSAN,
HAS HE GONE?
PHOEBE, HE KNOWS ALL.
YES. YES,
I KNOW HE DOES.
BUT WHAT DID HE SAY?
IT WAS WHAT HE DID.
HE TOOK LIVVIE
WITH HIM.
SUSAN.
SUSAN,
YOU MUSTN'T SAY THAT.
YOU'RE NOT DISTRAUGHT,
ARE YOU?
HE DID.
HE WRAPPED HER UP
IN A CLOAK.
SUSAN.
YOU'RE SUSAN THROSSEL.
YOU REMEMBER ME,
DON'T YOU?
PHOEBE?
YOUR SISTER?
I WAS LIVVIE ALSO.
HE TOOK LIVVIE WITH HIM.
OH...
HEAVENS.
NOW...
SUSAN...
SUSAN, WHO AM I?
YOU'RE PHOEBE.
AND WHO WAS LIVVIE?
YOU WERE.
OH. THANK YOU.
BUT HE TOOK LIVVIE
WITH HIM.
LOOK...
SHE'S LEAVING.
WE SHALL SEE.
DRIVE HER TO THE COUNTRY.
WHERE, SIR?
ANYWHERE.
BURY MISS LIVVIE
IN A LONELY SPO AND DON'T RETURN
BEFORE SUNDOWN.
SUNDOWN?
BUT, SIR...
SUNDOWN.
WHIP UP THE HORSES.
OFF WITH YOU.
LADIES! YOU'VE ARRIVED
JUST TOO LATE
TO BID MISS LIVVIE FAREWELL.
MISS LIVVIE?
I'VE SENT HER HOME.
'TIS
A GOOD RIDDANCE.
MARY!
EDMUND BLADES, IF YOU'VE COME TO
SEE MISS LIVVIE, YOU'RE TOO LATE.
SHE'S GONE HOME.
BUT... MY FLOWERS.
MY BONBONS.
I'M SURE
THESE EXCELLENT LADIES
ARE FAR MORE DESERVING
OF THEM.
MISS SUSAN...
I'VE BROUGHT YOU
SOME FIREWOOD.
THANK YOU, SIR.
MISS PHOEBE?
YES, SIR?
IT ISN'T RAINING,
BUT YOUR FACE IS WET.
I WISH ALWAYS TO KISS YOU
WHEN YOUR FACE IS WET.
SUSAN...
DEAREST PHOEBE THROSSEL...
WILL YOU BE PHOEBE BROWN?
YOU KNOW EVERYTHING,
SIR?
AND THAT I AM NO A GARDEN?
I KNOW EVERYTHING...
EXCEPT THAT.
SIR...
THE DICTATES
OF MY HEAR ENJOIN ME TO ACCEP YOUR
TOO-FLATTERING OFFER.
OH, SIR...
SUSAN ALSO.
THANK YOU.