Hold it, hold it.
No, no, not you.
Come on, get out of here. Get out of here!
Yes, that's fine. Thank you.
Mrs. Lucy, it's beautiful.
That's it. Are you the father?
- No.
- I am.
Get out of here.
This is nothing to the celebration
this town ought to give for your leaving.
- Now, get out and stay out.
- Yeah. We don't want any more
private detectives like you
making public scandal.
Board!
If the towns on this road knew
how much danger was headed their way,
they'd all be out flagging this train
to keep on going.
If you ever need me, boys,
you'll know where to look.
Right where there's the most trouble.
Oh, my darling!
Mr. Nash, I don't mind telling you,
with all my jewelry,
I'd be terrified of someone stealing it
if I hadn't had you here
to help me guard it.
If you're going to stay in San Morego,
you'll be needing
a bodyguard every minute.
I've always found it the most peaceful
and respectable place in the world.
They've cracked down on racketeers
in all the big crime cities.
And so they've moved in,
whole mobs of them,
on your nice, quiet, little city.
It's unprepared and unaccustomed
to dealing with their dirty work.
Well, that sounds logical, all right.
And it's logical I need a bodyguard.
Most certainly.
Just be careful who you get.
In a city full of crooks,
you might get a crook for a guard.
But how should I know?
You've lived there.
Perhaps, you can recommend somebody.
- I could if you insist, Mrs. Arden.
- Oh, would you please, Mr. Nash?
I'd be so grateful.
And when you're in San Morego,
don't forget to call me up.
I'm in the book.
Mrs. Arden, you're in the bag.
Hello.
- Can I help you?
- You're not a customer, are you?
No, sweetheart, I'm a detective.
Oh, that's just what we need,
a detective to find us a case.
Something told me to come here.
Maybe it was because of you.
Something told me to get out of here.
Maybe it was because of you.
You're leaving because Ames can't afford
to keep you on. Is that it, kitten?
The only case we've had
in weeks was a woman...
Do you keep this?
The only case we've had in weeks
was a woman who lost her pet poodle
and wanted Ames to find it for her.
- And Ames couldn't find it, eh?
- No.
Well, perhaps that's a good thing.
A poodle would probably scare Ames
to death. Is the genius in?
- Yes, but he doesn't like to be waked up.
- Oh, that's all right.
I'll probably be just a part
of his nightmare.
What's this?
- Shane.
- Your old partner come back.
What for?
To save you from further
wild goose chases after pet poodles.
- Why didn't you stay where you were?
- I needed a rest.
Bet you'll get plenty of it here.
Ames Detective Agency.
Who? Mrs. R. Manchester Arden?
Honey, this is it. I'll take it in here.
Mr. Ames speaking personally.
Shut up.
Mrs. R. Manchester Arden?
Why, of course, I've heard of you.
Well, it was very subtle of the gentleman
to recommend us. All right, Mrs. Arden.
Oh, yes, we should have a small advance.
Say $250.
I'll handle your case personally.
Goodbye, Mrs. Arden.
Well, was that phone call another one
of your practical jokes?
Yes, practical to the extent of $250.
You heard me.
Well, maybe you'll let me know
what this case is,
now that you've assigned me
to it personally.
Mrs. R. Manchester Arden is a grand
dame. I met her on the train.
Very doughy, with flesh and money both.
Enough money to believe my story
that she needed a bodyguard
because this town was full of crooks.
- So, I told her about you.
- Well, what do we do now?
You follow her wherever she goes.
So she'll think she needs you,
better hire a few mugs to appear
in the background and scare her a little.
Some of your friends will do.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
- Hello, what's your name, little girl?
- Murgatroyd.
- Can you spell it?
M- U- R... No, don't tell me.
G- A-T- R- O- Y...
- D.
- Murgatroyd.
Sounds like the technical name
for killing your mother.
Oh.
- Have you finished packing all your things?
- Yes.
And all the things that weren't yours,
but that you thought you could use?
- Yes. I mean, I'm all packed.
- Good.
Now you can start unpacking
because you're staying on, honey,
in spite of your name and everything.
But not in spite of never having been paid.
It's going on three weeks now.
A nice lady is sending down $250.
You'll be paid out of that.
All right. I start unpacking.
When the money arrives.
You'll be all right.
Things are going to start happening
around here and we can use you.
In fact, I'd like to have you around
even though things weren't happening.
Sort of taken things over, haven't you?
Office, business, secretary, everything.
- That reminds me, how's your wife?
- She's fine.
She hasn't thought about you
for a long time.
I'll take you home to dinner tonight
just to prove to you
how completely she's forgotten you.
- Astrid?
- Just a minute.
- I've brought a guest home to dinner.
- All right.
- Hello, kitten.
- Shane. How nice.
- And tomorrow is your birthday, isn't it?
- Yes, how nice of you to remember.
- Do I get my birthday kiss now?
- You certainly do.
I wish somebody'd remember
when my birthday is.
- Let me have your coat.
- Thank you.
Now, look here, Shane.
I know she used to be in love with you,
but that was three years ago,
before she married me.
And all this reminds me
that she might have married me.
- But you went away.
- Yeah.
But now I'm back.
Isn't it wonderful
having Shane back with us again?
Yeah. Everything's gonna be all right now.
- Are you going to be home this evening?
- I certainly am.
Well, that's a fine way
to tend to business, Ames.
Huh?
I told you, you should follow Mrs. Arden
whenever she goes out.
Yeah, but you didn't say
anything about tonight.
Well, I meant to.
She's going to a piano concert tonight.
- Like the piano?
- No.
Is that nice?
After all the trouble I've gone through
to get you your first case in months.
- Excepting, of course, hounding poodles.
- Have you really got a case already?
Oh, you wonderful darling.
It'll be just like old times if you can get
the business going good again.
We're a cinch, kitten. Aren't we, partner?
Oh, I'm sorry.
Kitten, how many times
do I have to tell you
to change the name on this door
to "Shane and Ames"?
Since you landed,
I've had too much else to do.
Hello, what's this?
Oh, that reminds me.
What are you doing tonight?
I've got a date.
Break it, precious,
and you and I'll have a lot of fun.
Oh, forgive me if I don't break
the date I already had.
It was with
the most thoughtful fellow named...
Named Shane.
Then I didn't catch you after all.
I knew we had a date,
I just wanted to see if you remembered.
- Oh, sorry. I thought you were sleeping.
- I was going to. I mean... No.
This is my partner, Mr. Shane.
- And this is Miss Valerie...
- Purvis.
Yes, Purvis, Purvis. Thank you.
Miss Purvis has got trouble.
- She wants us to take care of it.
- She came to the right place.
- Can you help me?
- If anybody can, we can.
- What's your trouble?
- Well, a man she met in Baltimore
promised to marry her and ran out on her.
- Yes, I know his kind.
- Sure you do.
She followed him to this town,
but she hasn't been able
- to get in touch with him.
- A rotten trick.
And, she thought... Yeah.
She wants us to find him for her.
- How?
- Well, she's been in contact
with her boyfriend's pal,
a man named Farrow.
- But Farrow won't tell her anything.
- We'll make him tell.
This means so much to me.
Could either of you
take care of it personally?
Now, that depends
on how much it means to you.
Well, I'll show you.
Would this...
Would this show you
how much it means to me?
$100?
I thought you really cared for the man.
Oh, but I do.
We'll find him for you.
Now, tell us where we can pick up Farrow,
and how do we know him
when we see him?
Well, I have an appointment
to meet him tonight at 8:00
- in the lobby of the General Fremont Hotel.
- That'll peg him for us.
Then all we'll have to do will be
to follow him wherever he goes,
and he'll lead us, eventually,
to your betrayer.
- Thank you so much.
- Thank you.
I couldn't find a taxi.
Let's go this way.
- What time do you finish tonight, kitten?
- Pretty late, daddy.
- Mr. Shane, telephone.
- Oh, thank you. Excuse me.
If you come back with some story
about having to leave,
I'll know it's a frame-up.
You don't say. I'll come right out.
Now listen, kitten,
I've got to go away for a little while,
but I'll be back before
the end of the last show.
- I'll wait for you near the dressing rooms.
- All right.
- Check, please.
- I knew it.
Remember to put this in the books,
charge to expenses,
for Mrs. R. Manchester Arden.
You'll have to take
a cab home alone, honey.
Well, you might at least
have given me some sort of an alibi.
I will. I've got a pip.
I have to go up to the graveyard.
The graveyard? What for?
To see about somebody
who's dead, of course. Come on.
Poor dear old Ames.
It's the first time he ever did anything
in an appropriate place.
You must feel kind of bad,
losing your partner so suddenly,
- just when the firm was getting going.
- Well, Dunhill, what's the dope?
One pill out of that old Webley
did the work.
- Right to his heart, through the side.
- What's...
What was he doing with his arm up
like this? Parting his hair?
I don't know. That big burn on his coat,
- that gun was poked right into his ribs.
- Let me see that.
- Oh, Dunhill, I didn't find anything yet.
- Well, keep looking.
Ames' gun was sorted away
in his shoulder holster.
- Was he working on a case, Shane?
- He was trailing a man named Farrow.
- A man named Farrow. What for?
- For $200.
Don't you want to take a closer look
at your silent partner?
No. No, you've seen everything I could see.
I'd better run along
and break the sad news to the widow.
Murgatroyd speaking. Shane?
Well, moonbeam,
where do we go from here?
I thought you'd know that.
You're supposed to be the man
that knows all the answers.
- Anything wrong?
- No.
- Hello, Shane.
- Why, hello.
Honey, I thought you might like
to join my friends here for a little party.
Sergeant Dunhill
and Police Detective Lieutenant Pollock.
- Gentlemen, Babe.
- Pleased to meet you, I hope.
I got out to the graveyard
just after you'd left. Sorry I missed you.
Yeah, so am I. There's no place
I'd rather see you than in a graveyard.
Pardon me, please.
Roy here tells me
that you were in an awful hurry
to get away from that cemetery.
I couldn't bring Ames back to life
no matter how long I stayed.
Oh, but you said you were leaving
to break the news to the widow.
And you didn't go out there
and tell the widow.
- No.
- No.
Instead, you phoned your secretary
to tell her.
If this is boring you, sweetheart,
we'll leave.
- Oh, no. Go ahead.
- Oh, Shane, don't be so stingy.
How do you expect us
to turn up anything on the Ames killing
if you don't give us what you got?
You needn't get a headache
over Ames' murder.
- I'll bury my own dead.
- That's what I thought.
That's exactly why I came to see you.
Now, Shane, give us the lowdown.
- Where were...
- Pardon me.
Well, this is the best place
in the world for third degree.
- Isn't it, Roy?
- I'll say so.
Now, wait a minute, Shane.
Your partner Ames was shot
while tailing a man named Farrow.
And shortly after you left your
partner's dead body, Farrow was killed.
- I killed him for revenge.
- Cut that out.
Farrow died before he could say
who shot him.
Oh, but you're not a man
to need his word for it.
Babe and I are trucking along
if you're through.
- Not so fast.
- You're not ready to pinch me yet,
- are you, Pollock?
- No, not yet.
Swell. Come on, heartthrob.
Now will you have the name
on this door changed?
Just "Ted Shane, Private Operator."
- You win by process of elimination.
- Anything important happen?
A great, big, tall Englishman called.
- Oh, what did he want?
- He didn't tell me.
- What was his name?
- He didn't tell me.
That was a lovely case
you sent me out on last night.
I know, precious.
Widows are tough to initiate,
but if she turns up here,
keep her away from me.
- How could I?
- Hello, kitten.
Come in if I scream.
Well, I was just standing here
and zip, she went in. I couldn't help it.
Poor kitten.
Oh, Shane, did you really kill him?
Who put that bright idea
in your pretty little head?
Be kind to me, Shane.
Now you'd better go home and take
some sleeping tablets and get some rest.
And you will be careful
about coming here, won't you?
And I'll come to see you as soon as I can.
- How soon?
- Just as soon as I can.
How long do you have
to wear black, honey?
Don't you like me in black?
Oh, you look so good that people
will think you killed Ames just so
you could have mourning clothes
to make you look more gorgeous.
Well, now, don't worry
about the insurance or anything.
- I took care of the insurance already.
- Oh, well, then you'll be all right.
- Be kind to me, Shane.
- Excuse me.
- Shane speaking.
- How you doing, Shane?
- How am I doing?
- "Be kind to me, Shane."
Well, anyway, you love me
and know I wouldn't do anything wrong.
- Well, you might've killed Ames.
- Listen,
I'm supposed to be
a detective solving a crime case,
and everybody thinks
I committed the crimes.
Mrs. Ames thinks I killed her husband.
And the police think I killed Farrow
to avenge the husband.
And now you start.
But you were late
picking me up last night.
You know, precious, I wouldn't let
a little thing like killing Ames
make me late for a date with you.
Did you kill him? No kidding?
Hey, Shane, you better get
over here right away.
That Purvis dame is checking out.
The porter went upstairs for her bags.
Here.
Union Depot.
- Running out on me?
- I remember now.
- You're the other man.
- That's me, sister.
I've been named as the other man.
Driver, forget the Union Depot.
Go to the Carondelet Apartments.
I didn't expect you.
I noticed you weren't exactly
waiting around for me.
No. I mean, I expected
to see Mr. Ames this morning.
Then you're on your way down
to the morgue now?
- Oh, no.
- Well, that's where he is.
Just temporarily, of course,
until they bury him.
- I knew.
- Sure you did.
You didn't really want to see either of us
or you wouldn't be running out
of your hotel.
Oh, I had to leave there. There was a man.
There probably always will be men
where you are, child.
He came right up to my room
when I came in and followed me in.
Oh, I had the most terrible time
trying to get rid of him.
And then he kept phoning me all night,
wanting to come up and see me,
saying he was desperately
in love with me at first sight.
Oh, I can understand that, but not why
you didn't phone the house detective.
Well...
- Well, I couldn't.
- No? Why not, precious?
You see, the man
who was forcing his attentions upon me,
well, he was the house detective.
- Yes, I guess all us detectives like you.
- Do you?
Sure. Ames liked you, he's gone.
The hotel detective liked you, you're gone.
Maybe you and I could get someplace.
Yes, maybe the third time would work
a charm. I do need somebody.
Probably me.
Just put them right down here.
Nice place.
And what a beautiful view
from these windows.
The lights must be gorgeous at night.
You never realize how big a city is
until you see it from
way up high like this.
You aren't exactly the person
you pretended to be, are you?
I'm not quite sure I know what you mean.
We'll never get anyplace
if you insist on playing innocent.
All right. I won't play innocent anymore.
Good. Now, let's both quit acting
as though the other were an imbecile.
That story you told us yesterday
wasn't quite true.
Then you didn't believe it?
You gave us more money
than you would have if it had been true.
- But enough to make it all right.
- Mr. Shane, I...
Now, tell us,
without any phonus bolognus,
why you wanted Farrow shadowed.
Well, I wanted to know
whom he was meeting,
what he was doing in this town
and things like that.
You see, he was supposed to be
helping me and I didn't quite trust him.
Now, what was he supposed
to be helping you do?
Well, I'm afraid I can't tell you that.
You look lovely.
You'll make a charming hostess
when the police visit you.
Oh, but Mr. Shane.
Mr. Shane, they don't have
to know about me, do they?
- You will help me, won't you?
- How about you helping me?
Oh, you really do look gorgeous.
Tell me, did your pal Farrow
kill my partner Ames?
Why, yes, certainly.
That was Farrow's old Webley gun
the papers said was by Ames' body.
- All right, who got Farrow?
- I don't know.
Your enemies or some
of his own personal enemies?
His, I hope, but I'm not sure.
You haven't told me a thing
I didn't already know.
I guess I just came along for the ride.
Listen, I know I have no right
to ask you to help me,
but I might be able to pay for it.
- Of course, money does make a difference.
- How much?
- $500 to start.
- All right.
- Somebody robbed me!
- Me.
While you were in there fixing yourself
all up to vamp me into helping you,
- I got the $500 we've been talking about.
- Did you?
Get going, Mr. Shane. Your taxi's ticking.
Teach me how to do that,
and I'll knock that $500 off.
You better go out back
and get the fire hose
if you want to put out that seaweed.
Here, try one of these.
Get funny with me and I'll have to fog you.
Fog me?
That's what you've been trying
to do, isn't it?
Following me around,
smoking these smelly stogies.
I've got what it takes to do it.
If you're going to keep shadowing me,
you'll have to smoke something better.
- I'm telling you, mister.
- And I'm telling you.
If you're going to tag around after me,
you'll have to quit wearing
that monkey cap.
- Good morning, gentlemen.
- How are you?
Say, tell me, what do you know
about this Farrow fella?
- He's dead.
- Yeah, we heard that rumor, too.
Yes, sir. It's a good thing
they don't do that to all our guests.
Ruin our business.
- How long did he live here?
- Three days, poor fellow.
- Did he ever have any friends visit him?
- He didn't seem to have any in town.
- Except one lady, a blonde.
- Blonde's been the death of many a man.
Yes, sir. You'll be surprised, gentlemen,
but I remember her name.
Miss Valerie Purvis, Brandon Hotel.
Operator, get me the Brandon Hotel.
She used to phone him,
and then he'd meet her here.
And that's what she did last night.
Hello, Brandon Hotel?
This is Police Detective Lieutenant Pollock.
I wanna check on one of your customers.
A girl named Valerie Purvis.
- Yeah, thanks.
- Oh, she seemed so nice.
I'd hate to think
that she was connected with it.
Yeah? She did, huh?
All right, thanks a lot.
She was connected with it, all right.
She checked out this morning.
Don't take it too hard, baby.
Say, are you sure
that nobody else ever called on him?
That's all. Oh, wait a minute. Yes, sir.
There was another one,
a big, tall Englishman.
- Got change for a five?
- Oh, I think so.
Shane is coming.
- There you are.
- Yeah.
Hello!
Good afternoon.
I just came round to apologize.
And very decent of you it is. For what?
For doing what I did to your flat.
Rather messy, isn't it? May I come in?
- At the risk of being carried out?
- Oh, that's just a minor risk
compared to some of the dangers
I've had to go through,
and the adventures
in which I'm presently engaged.
- You'd want a whisky and soda.
- I'd like a drop of sherry if you don't mind.
- Sorry. I haven't any.
- What? No sherry?
This is delicious, old chap.
You should try it.
I'd like to have some champagne.
Have I got any?
No, you haven't.
Have you got a glass, old boy?
- Yes.
- Thanks.
- This is jolly, isn't it?
- Oh, you found it.
No, not yet.
I was looking for a certain horn.
Oh, you mean one of these things...
Yes, rather like that.
They've pointed the finger at me
for a lot of dirty tricks,
but never for a crime
like playing the saxophone.
Let's be serious, Mr. Shane, shall we?
Actually, I tried to get the horn
from you without paying for it.
Yes, that's natural.
And from your point of view, sensible.
Say, it's wonderful sherry.
Well, having failed to rob you of it,
I suppose I'll have to pay you
for return of the horn.
- Should we say $2,000?
- Say $5,000 and you've said something.
Very well, $5,000.
You could offer me a million
for a purple elephant,
- but that wouldn't mean a thing.
- Oh, I see, yes.
You need a retainer.
Oh, I beg your pardon, nothing personal.
- Shall we say $500?
- $500 settles it.
Very well.
I beg your pardon.
That's the right pocket.
Now, you'll hand me over
the horn, eh, old boy?
- No, old boy.
- But you've got to. I just paid you for it.
There are others after it, aren't there?
How do I know I ought
to hand it over to you,
- that you are the rightful owner?
- But I assure you.
Don't assure me. Prove it to me.
What do you know about Roland,
the great French legendary hero?
Just this much.
If you're trying to frame him,
I'll find you plenty to pin on him.
My dear old fellow, in the eighth century,
at the time of the powerful emperor
of France, Charlemagne...
Oh, I've heard of Shelly, all right.
- Splendid.
- Oh, I see you found my address book.
- Did you copy down some of the numbers?
- Rather, including the marginal notes.
As I was saying, Charlemagne,
as he's generally known,
conquered practically
all the land of Spain.
- Yes, I've heard of Spain, too.
- Amazing.
Well, the Saracen king of Spain...
Get me my sherry, will you?
Realizing he couldn't get rid
of Charlemagne, offered him tribute
of great wealth
and promised him complete submission.
Of course, that promise was a phony.
Then you do know something
about the history of that period.
Well, I know a double-cross
when I hear one.
Well, unfortunately, Charlemagne didn't,
old boy.
When the French withdrew,
our jolly old friend Roland
was in charge of the rear.
I say, that's delicious sherry.
Do have a sip.
When Charlemagne and his army
got well back into France,
the Saracens attacked Roland,
and there was a terrific fight.
Oh, thanks for the reminder.
I've got to call up Murgatroyd
about my fight tickets.
- Go right ahead. I'm listening.
- Well, it wasn't at all fair, you know.
Roland had only a few men
and the Saracens had 40,000.
Roland had a horn made of ivory
with which he was supposed
to be able to signal for 50 miles.
It's a good thing you're paying me
to listen to this.
Of course, the French never had a chance.
What's become of the little beast?
Have a shot yourself, will you?
I say, that's amazing.
How did you do that?
Roland, in spite of his shaky predicament,
refused to blow his horn
until he found he was the lone
French survivor and knew he was dying.
But it was too late then for him
to blow anything but taps.
Well, Charlemagne came back
with his army and got his revenge
by reconquering Spain.
But they never found Roland
or his trumpet.
And now, 1,200 years later,
we start looking for it.
- Hold that a minute, will you?
- Find anything in the divan?
Only a few hairpins
and some small change.
Come across.
Very well.
The Saracens found the trumpet,
and in revenge for their defeat,
decided to fix it
so that the trumpet wouldn't blow.
So, they stuffed it full
of the finest jewels,
which they stole
from Roland's dead soldiers.
Well, now, if you're going to take us
through the next 1,200 years,
by the time we find the trumpet,
we'll all be dead.
Yes. That's practically
the true history of the trumpet.
And nearly everyone who's been
connected with it has been killed.
Nice of you to cut me in on this.
But if that horn's really rammed
full of jewels, it'll be worth plenty.
It'll cost you much more
than $5,000 to get it from me.
- Then you have the trumpet?
- No.
- But you know where it is.
- No.
What?
You just inveigled me
into telling you what it is.
I say, that's a pretty rotten trick, old boy.
That's not cricket.
How much of this is cricket
and how much is racket?
And how much of that tripe
you've been telling me is on the level?
The tripe, as you call it,
happens to be the true history
of the trumpet and its real value.
- And that's why...
- Darkies were born.
At least, that's why
your partner Ames was killed.
And Farrow, too.
Take a letter.
Help! Help!
- That Englishman!
- Yes, Mr. Travers.
- He was here, too.
- But he locked...
He locked you in the closet.
Yes, I know all about it.
Come, sit down.
- You have an uncle, haven't you...
- Yes.
...who's a college professor,
an authority on European history?
- Yeah.
- Take pad and pencil.
We're about to dictate a letter to him.
- To my uncle?
- Yeah. Ready?
"My dear professor.
Your niece, my secretary,
"has allowed me to take this liberty
of writing you concerning
"a certain horn
which has been brought to my
"attention.
"A fabulous trumpet reported
to have belonged
"to the legendary hero, Roland.
"It is rumored that in the eighth century,
the French muscled in on the Spanish,
"and made a deal for the big payoff.
"It seems that 50,000 Frenchmen
once were wrong."
"The Saracens crammed
the trumpet full of valuable gems."
No kidding?
Well.
And I hope the same disaster
will not befall me.
And that's the story, without the accent,
as the English chap told it to me.
Say, which one's crazy?
You or the Englishman?
That's what I want to find out.
Just turn that story over
to your uncle professor,
and find out if any of it is possible.
Say, I've got a cousin
that specializes in brain diseases.
- Maybe I better turn it over to him.
- I know it sounds silly, honey.
But for $500, they can
tell me stories like that
and wreck my joint every day.
- For $500?
- Yes, I know. I know.
Hello. Miss Valerie Purvis? This is Shane.
Yes. Look, I've got hold
of something important,
and I've got to see you right away.
Better meet me in the lounge room of
the Buckingham Hotel as soon as you can.
I may be a little late,
so don't leave until I get there.
Goodbye.
Honey, run down to the lounge room
of the Buckingham,
and lounge around and keep your eye
on her without getting caught.
If she leaves, phone me right away.
But where will you be while she's waiting
for you at the Buckingham?
- You can reach me at Westgate 7696.
- But that's...
Yes, darling, the little lady's apartment.
So, you're the new chambermaid?
What are you doing here?
I told you to meet me at the Buckingham.
Do you mind very much, Mr. Shane,
taking off your hat
in the presence of a lady with a gun?
And would you be charming enough
to hold it above your head
with both your hands?
What are you going to do? Frisk me?
Why don't you make me do a handstand?
So you're the man I hired to protect me.
King Kong.
Hello? A lady for Mr. Shane?
Oh, by all means, operator,
put the lady on.
Hello?
Hello, Shane? How you doing?
Well, here I am at the Buckingham,
and she hasn't turned up yet.
I guess little Miss Innocence
didn't fall for the mastermind's tricks.
You don't think so?
Oh, well, don't worry, kitten.
You know no woman ever made
a chump out of Papa Shane.
Yes. Yes, I'll be careful.
Goodbye. You can hang up now.
You may not be a chump, but you'll be
a corpse if you try anything funny now.
Remember, if you fail to guess my weight,
I get a baby doll to take home.
Now, may I stop chinning myself
on this hat?
Go ahead.
Just what did you come here for?
To take a nap.
- Come in.
- I locked that door.
- You stay right here.
- Yes, ma'am.
- Put it right over there.
- Ma'am.
- A radiogram for you, madam.
- Thank you.
Bad news, I hope?
Oh, on the contrary, good news.
We're having a celebration.
Oh, splendid.
- Oh. Service for two?
- Yes.
I had a hunch
that I was going to have company.
So, that's why you didn't meet me
at the Buckingham.
I see. You preferred the privacy
of your own modest, little home.
Yes, I've always been known
as a regular old homebody.
- And a very thorough one.
- Yes, just an old custom of mine.
- What? No armistice? Even at dinner?
- Nope. Not yet.
Well...
Oh, did I tell you,
your English friend called on me today?
It seems he wants me
to find him some old French horn.
I suppose if somebody paid you for it,
you'd try and find Santa Claus.
Honey, if they paid me enough, I would.
Well, you'd have
as much chance of finding him
as you would of finding me
with an old French horn,
if there is any such thing.
You never heard of Roland or his trumpet?
Or how the Saracens filled it with gems?
Either I've hired the wrong detective
or you usually have brighter ideas.
I don't think I was shooting so wild.
He said the trumpet
and the killings of Farrow
and good old Ames were connected.
You were connected with the two killings.
But just vaguely, of course.
So there was a chance that you
and the trumpets were connected.
- There isn't any connection.
- There must be. Someplace.
It wasn't for nothing
the Englishman tore up my rooms,
gave me 500 good dollars,
and offered me a lot more.
$5,000. That's something to work for.
You know, we could mean something
to each other, really,
if the $5,000 didn't mean so much to you.
Darling, that $5,000 is only for the
delivery of some silly old saxophone
I don't even know exists.
But I do know about you.
Maybe, after I've cleared up
a few murders,
you and I could have a lot of fun.
Isn't that a lot surer than looking
for some silly old French horn?
Wouldn't that
be worth working for, really?
While you're figuring that out,
scratch your head, sweetheart,
with both hands.
I'm going to search the place.
- What are you looking at?
- Nothing.
You've been here for hours.
That's a long time to look at nothing.
Have a cigar, Officer.
Thanks. Hope this doesn't keep me awake.
Well, I guess the trumpet isn't here.
I told you it wasn't,
but you wrecked the place anyway.
Well, that's only
what your English friend did to me.
Would you mind
if I stop scratching my head now?
- Oh, no, of course not.
- Thank you so much.
You do trust me, don't you? A little?
If you want me to help you,
you've got to tell me everything.
I can't tell you. Yet.
- That's an answer the police won't go for.
- The police?
And we were going
to have such fun together.
So that silly offer of $5,000 does mean
more to you than me or anything!
Well, I'm not sure yet. I...
I'm in a tough spot.
$5,000 is a lot of money.
- Who is it?
- King Kong.
Hello, Shane.
Good morning, boys.
You're looking foggier than usual.
You seem to be having plenty
of trouble lately, Shane.
Even at home. Your joint's all torn up.
Looks like I got married, doesn't it?
Well, maybe not that, but you certainly
let yourself in for a lot of grief.
Or maybe you got mixed up
with something
without quite knowing what it was, huh?
Then you don't think I'm naughty.
You just think I'm dumb.
Ain't you gonna tell us
a little bit of something?
Telling you anything would be like
contributing to the delinquency of a minor.
- What'd he mean by that?
- Yeah, yeah.
I wasn't kidding.
I'll turn you over to the police
if you follow me with that beanie on.
My boss wants to see you.
- Alive?
- Yeah, for just a few minutes.
Aunty? Here he is.
Mr. Shane, I believe?
I believe one thing now myself.
This is no snipe hunt.
We're after something really big if you're
in on this chase, Madame Barabbas.
Oh, then you recognize me.
It's a face that haunts every detective
and copper in the world
in his worst nightmares.
Oh, that is a compliment, in a way.
It's the only sort of compliment
this old physiognomy deserves.
Madame Barabbas,
it's good to have you with us.
It's not often we're honored by a visit
from one of the really fine masters.
I don't seem much
of a nightmare to you, sir.
Not to me, Madame.
If you've come all the way
to our quiet little city,
somewhere about, there must
be plenty of money to be made.
Plenty of money, Mr. Shane? Say when.
No?
We begin well.
I mistrust a man who says when.
If he has to be careful not
to drink too much,
he can't be trusted when he does.
Shall we drink to the trumpet?
If we're going to talk about that
French saxophone, we'd better drink.
No kidding.
Are you really in this game of
"Bugle, bugle, who's got the bugle"?
I am.
You're here, I take it, as the representative
of the beautiful Miss Valerie Purvis?
I'm working for her. And I'm working
for an Englishman named Travers.
- Is he still after it, too?
- Yes.
Although, you couldn't exactly say
that I'm here working for either of them.
- Who else is there?
- There's me.
Oh, that's very good.
I mistrust a man who says
he isn't working for himself.
So far, the Englishman
has paid me $500 to get the trumpet.
The girl has paid out $500 for protection.
- Protection? From what?
- She hasn't said.
I think it's from the police,
from the Englishman
and probably from you, Madame.
Very probably.
Did she mention anything
about the trumpet?
She said she doesn't know anything
about any trumpets.
- I take it for granted she's lying.
- She's lying all right, Mr. Shane.
You're not drinking your drink.
Anything wrong with it?
I was just wondering.
There might be a knockout powder in it.
There was.
It would have laid you low
before you'd finished it.
And that cigarette would have
laid you low before you finished it.
Mr. Shane, I love you.
Now then, let's get back to business.
Mr. Shane, I spent six years
tracing that trumpet.
I finally found the owner of it
in Greece in the city of Salonika.
A man named Tyrilias Constantinidis.
I sent two people as my agents
to get it from him.
The Englishman Travers
and the beautiful Miss Valerie Purvis.
- They got it?
- They got it.
And decided to keep it for themselves.
Evidently, Miss Purvis further decided
to keep it for herself
and framed the Englishman.
I traced her here, as I suppose
the Englishman did, and here we all are.
Oh, there it is. My pipe case.
So that's what became of it.
- You stole it, you little thief.
- I'm telling you, mister.
And I'm telling you.
You stole it thinking the trumpet was in it.
- I ought to box your ears off!
- Don't put your hands on me!
- Why you! Why you!
- I'll kill you! I'll kill you!
Sit down, Kenneth, and behave yourself.
What were we talking about,
Mr. Shane, eh?
Oh, of course, that French horn,
as you call it.
Well, I assure you, it's worth the trouble.
Then it's worth paying me plenty for,
if I turn it over to you.
- Then you know where it is?
- Well, I know where to get it.
At the right time, for the right price.
What would you say
if I were to offer you $100,000?
- I'd say I ought to have an advance.
- Oh, of course. Of course.
- You say you got $1,000 from the others?
- That's right.
Supposing we double them.
You don't mean, by any chance,
double-cross them?
Oh, Mr. Shane.
If you really need
an answer to that question...
Supposing we let
the $2,000 do the talking?
I'll be listening.
I'm telling you again, mister.
- Don't hit me. I'll kill you.
- Here, Kenny boy!
- I'll kill you! I'll kill you!
- Here!
It's nice to see you two
getting acquainted.
This stuff makes it possible
to get along with anybody.
And $100,000 more
when you deliver the trumpet.
That makes it highly probable you'll be
the one who'll wind up with the trumpet.
In fact, Madame Barabbas, that settles it.
- You'll get me that trumpet, all right.
- The easiest and safest way I can.
But you're not hiring me
to do any murders.
If any difficulties arise
that calls for violence,
- Kenneth will take care of them.
- Him?
You heard what she said.
You heard what I've been saying.
You won't be the first,
but you'll be more pleasure.
Why, Kenneth,
you shouldn't talk to Mr. Shane like that.
He's wonderfully effective
with a revolver, you know.
I know. Now all he's got to do
is learn to hold on to his revolver.
A crippled newsboy took this away
from Kenneth on the way over.
Well, you won't need much help,
will you, Mr. Shane?
No, Madame.
In a few days, you'll have your trumpet
and I'll have my $100,000.
- Unless...
- Unless what?
Unless the girl's got you
the way she's got all the others.
She hasn't got me any way.
You've got me.
The only way it's possible to get me.
I've got to cool that guy off!
I'm gonna blow him wide open!
- And you can't stop me!
- Stop it, stop it, stop it, Kenny boy!
Wait till he gets the trumpet for us
and then,
Aunty will be glad to let you kill him.
I know, your name isn't on the door yet.
Never mind about the door, kitten.
We'll be moving into greener pastures
if we can keep this treasure hunt going.
My uncle, the professor,
says that story about Roland
is a famous old legend.
There might be such a trumpet.
- No?
- Yeah.
Oh, and here's his answer
all written out for you.
The professor says
there might be such a horn,
and $2,000 says there is.
- Only louder.
- Shane.
Another down payment on the saxophone?
Yes.
Maybe you can make a fortune
by not finding the trumpet.
Baby, when I get this cleared up,
you and I'll have a lot of fun.
Come in.
Don't be frightened, dear lady.
I just came by to apologize
and say how awfully sorry I was I had to
do what I did to your jolly, little place.
You know, all that messing about
with your furniture.
So, I thought I better make
some kind of atonement, so,
- I brought along this corsage.
- Oh, for me?
Yes, I thought it would
probably brighten up the place.
- Because you tore up the furniture?
- No, because I locked you in the cupboard.
Oh, that just shows you
how polite you are.
Yes, yes.
Well, I think I'd better be going.
Goodbye.
The way you scare people off,
I'm not sure you didn't kill Ames.
No kidding, when it's all over with,
will you tell me why you did murder him?
I'll tell you right now, precious.
I murdered him
so I could be alone with you.
Now get me Valerie Purvis on the phone.
- So you can be alone with her.
- And get that trumpet.
The others are still paying off
trying to get it.
- All she's asking for...
- And paying for.
...is protection.
So, she must have it somewhere.
And Papa Shane is going to stick right
with her until he gets his hands on it.
Miss Valerie Purvis?
Papa... Mr. Shane calling.
She's got it and I'm going to have it.
Hello. Valerie?
Look, darling, I'm coming right over.
Something's happened that makes me
think that for the next few days,
you're going
to need my constant protection.
Right.
- Who's that fellow in the uniform?
- He's Dr. Steven Fujiyama.
Oh, Fujiyama, huh?
Oh, that reminds me.
That trumpet of Roland's.
- What did you do with it?
- Didn't I tell you?
I lost it the other day
when I was taking a bath.
Yes, you know, I was blowing away
on it and my hands were soapy and I...
I blew so hard
that it slipped right out of my grasp
and went down the drain of the bathtub.
That's because I wasn't there
to protect you.
- Hello?
- Travers speaking.
What? Travers?
Wait a minute, I'll see if she's home.
- Are you home, Aunty?
- What does that crook want?
- What do you want?
- Probably wants to square himself.
If he's wise, he'll come right back home
to Aunty and behave.
I'm coming over at once.
I have some very important news.
You know,
even with me being pretty sure
that you're trying to double-cross me,
and you being pretty sure
that I'm trying to double-cross you,
being together has been grand.
Well, it's that double-crossing
that's made us trust each other.
Oh, but the double-crossing's
all over now, isn't it, Shane?
It is, sweetheart.
But that's no reason
that we have to break up just because
we're playing fair with each other.
Oh, I have to go.
Shane Detective Agency.
Go right in.
Mr. Shane? Oh, no, I can't disturb him.
He's in a very important conference.
Oh, all right.
Cigar? Drink?
Mr. Shane, I don't know whether
you're familiar with our organization,
the City fathers, but it's dedicated to the
preservation of the good name of our city,
and the peace and prosperity
of its citizens.
Oddly enough, Mr. Shane,
trouble seems to have begun
at just about the exact date
you arrived here to settle down.
In the last three weeks,
two murders have occurred in our city.
And you have been connected
with each of them.
We're being laughed at
by every other city on the coast.
Particularly, your old hometown, which
was wise enough not to let you return.
I know, I've seen that in newspapers.
Everything about these two murders
seems to point in some way to you.
But gentlemen, surely you're too smart
to take the police so seriously.
But it happens that their theory
that you might have killed your partner
seems pretty sound.
We don't say that you did kill him, but
we do say that you can tell us who did.
You give us the Ames killer,
and we'll take care of the rest.
Gentlemen, you've come
to the right place.
But whenever I undertake a case of this
sort, I always get an advance payment.
All we're giving you, Shane,
is 24 hours to give us the Ames killer.
What are you threatening
to do to me, City Papa?
Take me down behind the woodshed
and beat my pants off?
The City fathers
have their own very definite way
of taking care of people like you.
Papa Shane has his ways
of taking care of himself.
Oh, you're not going?
Well, goodbye. Come back again.
I hope you're not going
to become a father.
Take a letter. Allez-up!
Sears and Ward.
My dear...
Don't let me interrupt.
Oh, no.
Oh, I was...
Well, just... Was taking a letter.
In the morning, remind me
to take up where we left off.
Oh, I'll be here.
Oh, just a minute.
Shane Detective Agency.
I wanna speak to Mr. Shane.
It's very much important.
Can I take the message?
Oh, no, he's very busy now.
And all ready for that dinner
you've been promising me.
You shouldn't have come here.
I've told you how dangerous it is.
Yes, I know, precious.
But the only way to be sure of you
is to come and get you.
Besides, it used to be my husband's office,
and I go with it.
- Detectives Pollock and Dunhill are here.
- You've got to go, sweetness.
Oh, always there's something.
Unless you want
to have dinner with me in jail.
- But, darling, please, can't we...
- I'll call you up later.
- That was a pip, a nice, neat, little trick.
- Not this time.
Gentlemen. Walk right in.
Just put your feet up on the desk.
A man phoned with some sort
of a Latin accent,
and said it was very important
for you to be down to a boat,
the Fujiyama, and ask for a man
by the name of
- Eduardo Espinoza.
- That's all he said?
Well, there is a Fujiyama.
Came in yesterday. I checked on it.
- Good girl.
- You're not going down there to the ship?
I have to be nice to visitors
to our fair city, don't I?
Well, it's been nice knowing you.
If those two mugs
want to know where I am,
tell them I'm somewhere at the harbor.
Can you boys tell me where I'll find
a boat to take me out to the Fujiyama?
- You gonna hose the farmer's hut?
- Huh?
Well, there she is, brother.
That's the Fujiyama.
And am I burning?
Come on, let's go!
I say, you're a good shot!
You got them both.
When I shoot, I don't miss.
Valerie, if you touch that bag,
I'll shoot you loose from it.
You'll have to.
Unless you want to be smart
and split the trumpet three ways.
What?
And double-cross Madame Barabbas?
Certainly.
Stop, or I'll stop you!
Madame Barabbas. Come here, quick.
The trumpet!
- Where are you?
- In here.
- Where?
- Here.
Hello, kitten. Looking for something?
- It's her. She wants us.
- But where's the trumpet?
We're not going to leave you here.
Come on with us.
I say, one of the corpses is gone.
It's her again. We'd better hurry. Come on.
That whistle may mean something.
Did you hear it?
Yeah, let's see what it is.
- Well, Kenny boy.
- Shane!
Well, here, you're all together again.
Oh, I'm not with them.
I came here to see you.
I told the sailor to call you about Espinoza.
They were on the boat when I arrived.
We got to the boat before she did,
but we could not get to Mr. Espinoza.
If Espinoza's the man lying out there on
the pier, you got to him all right, Madame.
Yes. That's him.
He was very faithful to Miss Purvis
and would not give up the trumpet.
So Kenneth set fire to the boat
to force him to come on shore.
And here we all are.
And here we all are,
and I've got the trumpet.
- You've got it?
- You've got it?
Certainly, when I'm hired to get anything,
I get it.
Shane, if you've got that trumpet,
give it to me.
Here it is!
- Now you've got it!
- Oh, Kenny boy.
Hey, the British are coming! A raid!
I'm getting to be an expert
at taking toys away from your gunmen,
Madame Barabbas.
What? No gun?
Here, Kenny boy,
dry your eyes and blow your nose.
Now, let's talk about money.
You hired me to get the trumpet
and I got it.
Now listen, Shane.
I hired you first,
so that they wouldn't have it
and we would.
- We, Valerie?
- You remember me.
You said there wasn't any trumpet,
and that I was silly to talk about it.
Oh, but you knew I was lying, Shane.
You knew all the time that I was lying.
You're a lovely liar.
So, you're in on this?
Give me the trumpet and I'll give you
half the fortune I can sell it for.
The various killings
were all the young lady's fault.
- What nonsense.
- Nonsense? Listen, Mr. Shane.
I sent Miss Purvis and Travers to Salonika
to get the trumpet from the Greek, and it
was there he started the double-crossing.
Nothing of the sort.
Miss Purvis started the double-cross
in Hong Kong
when she made the deal with Espinoza.
But you're wrong.
I didn't double-cross you, my dear.
I simply didn't trust you.
You didn't exactly trust Espinoza
in Hong Kong, neither,
when you had him bring the trumpet in
on the slow boat,
and you beat him here on the fast one.
- So, you've got it all figured out, have you?
- Certainly.
You crossed Travers in Hong Kong,
you double-crossed Espinoza,
and then you triple-crossed poor Farrow.
Poor Farrow.
I only intended using him
to get the trumpet off the boat.
I warned him against you,
and he was getting wise to you, Purvis.
But he remained faithful to the end.
The end was when
Mr. Travers shot Farrow,
so the girl
wouldn't have his protection anymore.
And then shot Espinoza
out on the end of the pier.
You're a bit inaccurate there, Mr. Shane.
They were killed, I grant you,
but not by me.
No? Who else?
It wasn't Miss Purvis,
because the two gents
were more valuable to her alive.
And it wasn't Barabbas,
because she knows enough
to have her killing done for her.
And it certainly wasn't Kenneth.
Not little chubby over there.
I'm telling you, mister.
You've been saying that to me
for two weeks. You can't tell me anything.
I'm telling you that ninny Travers
never killed anybody.
I do the killing around here.
I plugged Farrow and the Spaniard.
- And you're next.
- Now, you're talking.
Now, we've got our peace offering
to the police with his confession.
A nice, hashed-up story nobody will want
to investigate too thoroughly,
for fear of getting
all mixed up themselves.
That's all I ask.
You're not going
to turn Kenneth over to the police.
Certainly. He's been a very naughty boy.
I won't allow it.
He's been more than a son to me.
You can get another son.
There's only one trumpet.
A victim to feed the police
is a part of my price.
The other part we'll discuss right now.
Trumpet, trumpet! I've got the trumpet!
How much am I offered for the trumpet?
Shane, you remember my promise?
I've had a lot of promises.
This is a cash transaction.
You're on, Mr. Shane.
I'm prepared to pay cash.
Cash, Madame?
Cash, cash, where do I hear the cash?
I offered you half
that the trumpet will bring.
I'll still settle for cash. Where is it?
You don't expect me to pay till I'm sure
that the trumpet is in that parcel.
All right, unwrap it. I guess that's fair
enough as long as I've got a gun on you.
Remember what you're getting, Madame.
The one and only horn of Roland,
stuffed with gems by the Saracens.
Hurray!
- Roland's horn.
- Are you sure?
Of course, just as we got it
from the Greek.
It's mine.
It's yours as soon
as you give me the cash.
- Here's the cash, Mr. Shane.
- And the horn is yours.
Come on. Let's open it and see the jewels.
- Pretty expensive sand.
- We've been robbed.
Tyrilias Constantinidis.
How do you spell it?
Hello, Sergeant.
Let me introduce Madame Barabbas.
You can get better acquainted with her in
the "Criminals Wanted" files at the office.
Pleased to meet you, Madame.
I'm telling you, mister!
Lie down on the floor
and keep out of sight.
- Are you hurt, darling?
- Come on, you, get up.
What are you doing to my Kenny boy?
Your Kenny boy only killed Farrow,
and tonight he killed Espinoza
out there on the pier.
- All right, take him away. Her, too.
- Here's his gun.
- He's in it, too.
- All right you, come on.
I say, what's up?
Take him along,
he's not as pure as he looks.
I say, Mr. Shane, that's not cricket.
- All right, take him along.
- Come on.
Well, Pollock, I've made a hero out of you.
Some people may even think
you're a detective.
Say, wait a minute.
What are you trying to do?
Stall out of that Ames murder?
Now, you oughtn't to say that to me
after what I've done for you.
Now, listen. There's $10,000
reward up now for Ames' killer,
and I need it.
But you're going to need brains to get it.
That's going to make it hard
for you and easy for me.
Easy.
- Say, wait a minute.
- Lieutenant.
- Did you get them all?
- Yeah.
- Did you get that girl, too?
- What girl?
Well, there was a girl here
when the shooting started.
Purvis. Come on.
Hello? Shane?
Good morning. How you doing?
Two tickets on the 3:45 train going north?
Okay. I'll meet you at the station.
- Oh, goodbye, Shane!
- Hello, kitten.
Say, when I get a little time,
maybe you and I can have some fun.
Hey, where's the telegraph office?
Board!
Here, send this wire for me.
And here's the money.
Hey, sir.
- What track is the 3:45 on?
- There she goes, boss.
Hello, boys. Looking for me?
Hey, boy, where's the telegraph office?
Straight ahead, boss.
And will you please send this for me?
- Well, where's the money?
- Send it collect.
Look, why did you sell them the trumpet
for less than they offered you?
In spite of my better offer,
in spite of me. Why?
Honey, days ago, I got this letter
from a professor of history,
telling me that there might be
such a trumpet,
but that there couldn't possibly
be any jewels in it.
- I didn't want to gyp you, honey.
- You're an angel.
I told you when a couple of murders were
cleared up, you and I could have some fun.
We will, won't we?
It's nice that it's all over, finally.
I got so tired of the whole mess.
Being afraid, hiding, telling lies.
Remember the first lie
you told me, darling?
About wanting to find a sweetheart?
It worked.
It found me a sweetheart, all right.
It'll be for always now, won't it, Shane?
You know, if it was only
the Ames killing, I should think
it'd have been simpler
to stay there and prove that
Farrow shot him.
If I could stay and prove that,
I wouldn't be running away, baby.
Then the police were right.
You really did it.
I never thought you'd say
that to me, darling.
You know I didn't kill Ames.
Even if you did,
it wouldn't make any difference to me.
I just thought that you were
the only other one who could've done it.
- The only other one except you, precious.
- Shane.
Honey, it blows.
You wouldn't accuse me
of a thing like that, even in kidding.
You know I didn't do it.
Down in your heart, you know it.
My love, that graveyard's famous
as a nice, safe place for lovemaking.
Ames knew that, and he'd have gone
there to be alone with you, darling.
And when you two went sneaking in there,
you'd have pretended you were frightened.
And you'd have a good, tight hold
on his right hand,
so he couldn't reach for his gun.
Then, suddenly,
you'd pretend you heard something.
And you'd grab him quick,
and cling, whimpering to him,
pretending you were afraid of ghosts.
And the poor chump would put his arms
around you and he'd hold you close,
and he'd tell you
in that brave company voice of his,
"There's nothing to be afraid of."
And you,
you'd stick a gun you got from Farrow
in Ames' side and you'd let him have it.
Then Ames fell dead
across somebody else's grave,
and you threw Farrow's gun
down beside the body,
figuring it was a cinch
for the police to grab Farrow for murder
and for you to grab
the trumpet for yourself.
Oh, then you knew all the time
that I'd killed him.
And yet, you loved me enough
not to give me up.
To take a chance of running away with me.
Oh, I was wrong to think
that you're cruel and brutal, darling.
You... Oh, you're marvelous.
Precious, I told you when we got
a couple of murders cleared up,
you and I could have a lot of fun.
The late evening paper!
Evening paper!
Get the evening paper!
- Oh, we'll have one.
- Yes, go ahead.
I'd love to know what happened
to Madame Barabbas and her gang.
Here you are.
Late evening paper, magazines.
Oh, hello.
You remember me.
Yeah, we got a telegram to pick you up
on the Ames murder case in San Morego.
I had my secretary send that.
- You've got him?
- I've got her.
I just couldn't get her to confess until
she thought we were safe and on our way.
Come on.
- She's gone.
- Huh?
How would you...
How would you like to make $10,000?
No, ma'am,
I'm a respectable, law-abiding woman.
Be quiet, and listen to me.
Well, Shane, I guess you're under arrest.
Oh, keep your shirt on,
she's here somewhere.
Hey, man!
Let me have them bracelets,
and give me my $10,000.
You'll miss that reward, won't you, Shane?
Now, I'll miss the $10,000, all right,
but I'll miss you, too, honey.
- I thought you cared about me.
- I do, Valerie.
But I won't play the sap for you.
You gave the works to the Englishman,
the Spaniard, Farrow and Ames.
The last three fell for you
and they're dead.
I'm crazy about you, sweetheart, but I just
won't be the fourth guy to die for you.
No.
But for me, you'll go through
something that'll be worse than death.
Because you'll always remember me,
the one woman you couldn't take
for both love and money.
The one woman who handed you
double-cross for double-cross
right up to the end.
'Cause now you found a woman
can be as smart as you are.
Someday you'll find one who'll be smarter.
She'll marry you!
- Hello!
- Hello, kitten.
How you doing, Shane?
- Well, I cleared up a couple of murders.
- Now we can have a lot of fun.