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Scooby-Doo! Stage Fright (2013)
[DEWEY HUMMING]
Careful with that. Lift with your legs. Your legs. Did you wipe your feet before you came in? I'm talking to you. Huh? [GASPS] Disgusting. The garbage in this trash can is filthy. I want this garbage cleaned at once. Hello. Is anyone listening to me? Am I the only one here who cares about cleanliness? [ALL GASPING] [PHANTOM CACKLING] Huh? ROADIES: Huh? [GASPS] [SHIVERING] [GASPS] [STAMMERING] The Phantom. Did you know Chicago is the third largest city in the U.S.? - Like, I know it has the best pizza. - Yeah, pizza. [CHUCKLES] Did you know Chicago has almost 200 art galleries? You really have no idea where my interests lie, do you? I still can't believe we're really finalists on Talent Star. Aah! - Have I mentioned it's my favorite show? - Once or twice. - In this breath. - Well, it is. And Brick Pimiento is the greatest host ever. Ooh. There he is. I'm so excited. I really didn't think we were gonna make it through that last round of eliminations. Oh, come on, Daph, we had it sewn up. You know singers have the advantage. Hey, that's not the song we're doing. This is a little something I wrote myself. - Like, that's catchy. - Eyes on the road. Eyes on the road. Right. [CAR HORNS HONK] Fred, that's beautiful. I really like you. It. I like it. Not you. I mean, I like you but... Heh, I, uh, like your song. Thanks. You guys are good, but me and Scooby are gonna beat you. Right, Scoob? You betcha. Uh, you're not in the competition. We will be, once Brick sees our amazing juggling act. You can't just audition the day before the finals. Like, you can, if you're awesome. VELMA: Okay, we definitely wanna hit the Field Museum. There's a Picasso exhibit. Oh, oh! The Mineralogical Society has the world-famous soap diamond on display. Does it say anything in those books about that Opera House where we're shooting? VELMA: Yeah. It's almost a hundred years old. It's been closed since the '70s. And there are rumors that it's haunted. [SHAGGY GULPS] Of course it's haunted. Like, when do we ever go to a place that is not haunted? Wait, who's driving? Uh, green means go, right? ALL [IN UNISON]: Shaggy. - Scooby-dooby-doo, heh. [ALL SCREAMING] This place is amazing. I can't believe it's been closed for so long. I'm sorry, sir. No animals allowed except seeing-eye dogs. Fine. You guys, go ahead, we'll catch up with you. No, they won't. Okay, we'll, uh, see you later. [BOTH CHUCKLE] We're supposed to check in with the assistant director? Dewey? Heh, yeah, good luck with that. He's in there. [SNIFFS] What? Where? What happened? - You know, that guy. - The Phantom. [SIGHS] - Hello, we're supposed to check in. - Yeah, I know. But you're gonna have to wait. What? Where? The Phantom. Ugh. - The Phantom? - Unh, he keeps doing that. You know, overuse of smelling salts can damage the nasal passages. - His or mine? - His. [SNIFFING] The Phantom! [SIGHS] Hey, I found that clipboard the Phantom took. And also I quit. I ain't hanging around this place for another second. It's haunted. DAPHNE: "Christine must win"? Well, gang, it looks like we've got another mystery on our hands. - Hold it right there. - Hey, like, it's just a bass, man. Sure it is. - Oh, uh, well, go on in then. - Thank you. Chrissy does not give interviews unless she can approve all questions in advance. She will accept no questions regarding politics, religion or her favorite color. Because I said so. - Well, hello there. Are you...? - Are you trying to psych her out? - Is this some kind of mind game? - I was just saying hi. - Well, don't. - You can't just talk to Chrissy. She's very sensitive. You have to talk to her... ...before you talk to her to let her know you're going to talk to her. - Isn't that right, sweetie? - Whatever. BOTH: You see? - Yeah, hi. We're here to check in. - We're checking in! Uh, Mr. Ottoman's kind of unconscious right now? - Are you saying we can't check in? - They're saying we can't check in. - This is totally unacceptable. - Uh... BARB: She said, "Uh." They're pretty much like that all the time. Hey, heh. You're Emma, right? The Violinist? Yeah. And you're Fred and Daphne. I saw your audition tape, you guys were great. And I'm not just saying that because of the cameras. - What cameras? - Those cameras. You know, they're catching all the backstage drama. That's the best part of the show. All the who likes who, who hates who stuff. Hello, everyone, and welcome to Talent Star. Hey, I'm your host, Brick Pimiento. I just wanted to reassure you all that everything is fantastic, just fantastic. There isn't a problem, nothing happened and there's definitely no ghost. BARB & LANCE: Ghost? - Ghost? I didn't say ghost. Why would I say ghost when there's no ghost, heh? Fantastic. [LAUGHS] - There he is. - Yeah, there he is. You're okay there, right, Dewey, heh? Fantastic. Well, carry on. [YAWNS THEN SNIFFS] I smell dog. Uh, Mr. Ottoman, are you all right? Dogs are nothing but big furry sacks of germs. Did you know that? - I don't think that... - I'm going to find that dog... ...if it takes me all night. Give me that. SHAGGY: Mr. Pimiento. Mr. Pimiento! Can we have two minutes of your time? We've got an act that's just terrific. Yeah, terrific. My friends, I've built my career on two deeply held beliefs. One, all talent deserves a chance to be seen. And two, juggling stinks. [BOTH GASPING] So, what have you got for me? [BOTH CHUCKLING] [CHUCKLES] [BOTH GASP] Terrible. That was just... [CHRISSY SCREAMING] [BOTH GASP] Aah! I don't know what that was but I'm running away from it. SCOOBY: Me too. [ALL PANTING] Is it him? [PHANTOM LAUGHING] [CHRISSY SCREAMS] - Yeah, it's the Phantom. - The Phantom? - What are they doing...? - There. Now he's there. Velma, you watch the monitors. You can tell me where he is. - Daphne, you come with... - Yes. [SHAGGY & SCOOBY GASPING] - Which way? VELMA: Turn left at the end of the hall. Second door on your left. BRICK: Are you getting all this on camera? - Yeah, this is great stuff. Fantastic. Should we use it for promos or leak it to Whotube? - Both. - Hmm. Look out! Are you okay? FRED: Velma, which way? - I don't know. I can't see where he went. In here. - He'll never think to look in here, right? - Right. [SNIFFS] I smell lemons. [SNIFFS] Yeah, I smell lemons too. Do you smell lemons? [SCOOBY & SHAGGY SCREAM] [PHANTOM LAUGHING] There. He's heading north. - North, which way is that? VELMA: Go left. No, right. Then left. [BOTH GRUNT] - I'm sorry. - No, I'm sorry. - I didn't mean to... VELMA: Go. He's on the stairs. What? Did you see that? Maybe he really is a ghost. How could he just disappear? - There must be a rational explanation. - Yeah, like he's a ghost. [SCOOBY GIBBERING] A ghost who smells like lemons? That sounds kind of weird. And it's not weird to have a ghost who doesn't smell like lemons? We have to get to the bottom of this. [DOOR OPENS] [ALL GASP] Dog. Dog, where? Get that germ sack out of here. Right now. Did he leave footprints? I think I see footprints. He didn't touch any walls, did he? Oh, my gosh. Now I'll have to sanitize the entire building. Good thing I brought bleach. Out, I said. Out, out, out. Come on, guys. I want this floor buffed. And I want it polished. Okay, I'll check us in to the hotel and do some Internet research. Shaggy and Scooby, you go to the library on State Street. See what you can find out about the Opera House's history. How are we the choice for library research? I'll see what I can find out in the building. Daphne, you come with... Yes. - I'm going with Fred, heh. - Ah. Welcome to the Hotel Canard. How may I be of service? - Hello, I need to check... - Hi, checking in. Barb and Lance Damon. - And Chrissy. - I'm sorry, this young lady was... - Hey, are you giving us attitude? - I think he's giving us attitude. Listen, buddy, I want someone to take Chrissy's bags to the room now. Go ahead, I'll wait. Humph. Oh, Chrissy. Are you okay? Of course, I'm okay. Why wouldn't I be okay? Weren't you scared of the Phantom? You were screaming... [LAUGHING] That wasn't a scared scream, stupid. It was a happy scream because he told me I'm gonna win the competition. - He told you... - I'm gonna win. Even if he has to obliterate all the other contestants. - Isn't that awesome? Heh. VELMA: Uh... It's true. We have a genuine psycho on our side. Score. And that's why the Phantom wrote, "Christine must win" on that clipboard. - Her name's Christine. - But call her Chrissy. Only don't call her Chrissy because don't talk to her. - You're getting nerd breath all over her. - Come on, Chrissy. Keep smiling. - Oh, they're unbearable, aren't they? - Yeah. - Who are you? - I am The Great Pauldini. - My card. - Uh, that's an egg. Okay, egg, card, whatever. I made it appear, right? Can you do that? No, you can't because you're not a magician, heh. - Who's a magician? - You are? Oh, yeah, heh. Up high. That's what I'm talking about. WALDO: He's pretty unbearable himself. - Tell me about... Hello? [WALDO CLEARS THROAT] Waldo. The ventriloquist. And here's Hufnagel, my dummy. - Hi, toots. - And I sit on his lap. It's funny. Not at all demeaning. Right? - Right. - Right. Catch you later. Oh, my gosh, he is adorable. I am not adorable. I am hot. - You know, what? He kind of is. - Totally. Um, I saw him first. - Hey, you guys are that band, right? - Yes. ALL [UNISON]: We are Girlasaurus Rex. [ALL GROWLING] [LAUGHS] Oh, my gosh, we are so metal, heh. Cathy. It's so not metal to say, "Oh, my gosh, we're so metal." Right. Sorry. We were a country act until three months ago. We agreed we weren't telling people that. Now, come on, look surly. I think a lemon-scented ghost would fit right in with this crowd. Fred, why do ghosts and monsters and stuff turn up wherever we go? - Is it something about us? - No, this happens to everyone. - What? - It would be too much of a coincidence... ...if this only happened to us. So logically everyone must run into ghosts and monsters all the time. - Really? - Sure, it's simple math. They must be everywhere. [GLASS SHATTERS] [ALL SCREAM] - What are you doing here? - What are you doing here? I'm Mel Richmond. I own this building and I have a right to lurk in it. - You must be from the show, right? - Yeah, we're contestants. Right. Well, uh, good luck to you. You make a cute couple. We're not a cute couple. I mean, heh, we're not a couple... ...so we can't be a cute one, although we would be if we were. Which we're not. [CHUCKLING] I mean, it's not that we don't like each other, we just don't "like" like each other. It's not likely. Right, Fred? Or do we? We don't, right? Do we? Why are we talking about this so much? Can we change the subject now, please? This is none of your business. Uh, Mr. Richmond, do you know anything about the Phantom? Argh, that business again. Look, that was all way before my time. I inherited this place a few years ago when my father passed away. Oh, I'm so sorry. Me too, it's costing me thousands of dollars a week. I can't do anything with it. People are still spooked by that Phantom nonsense and that was 35 years ago. What was 35 years ago? Uh, it happened back in the '70s. Before that there had been some oddities. But, you know, nothing scary. But when my father turned the place into a disco, all heck broke loose. The Phantom wreaked havoc every night. People thought it was part of the show. [PEOPLE CHEERING] Despite the Phantom, the club flourished. Customers looked forward to seeing him. Even though it was said his mask hid a terrible deformity. [LAUGHING] No one was ever really hurt. But then the Phantom became more destructive. He even set fires. Then one night, he destroyed the disco ball. [LAUGHING MANIACALLY] After that, no one came back. Finally, my father had to close the place down. I hadn't been able to rent it at all until the Talent Star people came around. Now they say the Phantom's back. Well, maybe I'll get lucky and he'll burn the place down... ...so I can collect the insurance money, eh? Heh, heh. Or maybe I should put on a cape and mask and do it myself, ha, ha. [GASPS] What? Ah, now, don't look at me like that. You see, that's why I don't make jokes. Know what I like best about going to the library, Scoob? - The books? - Nope. The fact that it's far, far away from that Phantom guy. You said it. And it's nice that Velma trusts us with such an important assignment like... [BOTH SNIFF] SHAGGY & SCOOBY: Pizza. [SHAGGY PANTING] Give me eat. Right this way, sir. [GIBBERING] Do you have anything bigger than the extra-extra-large? Yeah, but it's not on the menu. Oh, and you have to sign a release saying we're not responsible if you die. - We'll take it. - Alrighty. But I'll have to move you to another table. Why? Because this one is smaller than your pizza. BOTH: Awesome. [SIREN WAILING] Aah! Mm! [SHAGGY CHUCKLING] If you don't mind, we'd like to be alone with the pizza. Okey-dokey. Uh, we can wrap up the leftovers for you. Leftovers? [SHAGGY & SCOOBY LAUGHING] [SHAGGY & SCOOBY GULPING] [CHUCKLES] [BOTH GASP] [APPLAUDING] I'd just like to say that it's an honor to be in your presence. Like, I'm sure it is. [DOOR OPENS THEN BOTH GASP] [PEOPLE CHEERING AND APPLAUDING] WOMAN: I love you, Lotte. Lotte! I love you. Thank you. - Who's that? - That's Lotte. She's on Talent Star, and she's already won a bunch of other talent shows. She was great on America's Got Singing... ...and Sing or Die and Singetty-Sing-Song-Sing. LOTTE: Mm-mm. I do not sign for anyone wearing tights and shorts. Because it's wrong. [GASPS] [CRYING] Yeah, yeah, you better run. Leave us. [SHIVERING] I want you to take a message to Daphne and Fred. Tell them they don't stand a chance. I will crush all who oppose me. I will feast upon their blood. Their families will weep over their smoldering corpses. I will leave nothing but their scarves. So swears Lotte. L-O-T-T... ...E! Lotte. [CACKLING] [SCREAMING] Keep the change. [SCOOBY & SHAGGY PANTING] - Hey, guys. - Where have you been? - The library closed hours ago. - The what? Never mind, I found plenty of information online. There was definitely a Phantom back in the '70s. I don't think the one we saw was the same person. This is from earlier tonight. - Where did you get that picture? - It's all over the Internet. Talent Star is really milking this for publicity. See? The outfit is different. What we saw today was someone taking advantage of the old stories for their own. But you saw him disappear, right? He must be a real ghost. I saw it on a monitor. It could have been faked. - So who are the likely suspects? - Definitely Chrissy's parents. You're right. The Phantom seems interested in making sure Chrissy wins the competition. And Brick Pimiento. He was a little too quick to capitalize on the Phantom for publicity. Could he be doing this to boost the show's ratings? What about Mel Richmond, the guy who owns the Opera house? Maybe what he said about insurance money wasn't a joke. What about Dewey Ottoman? He's creepy. - Does he have a motive? - Isn't creepy a motive? Ooh, ooh! You gotta put Lotte down. You think Lotte is the Phantom? I think she's scarier than the Phantom, heh. Put her down. Hmm. Everyone on this list but Mel Richmond and Lotte have been seen... ...at the same time as the Phantom. [GRUNTS] Guys, it's getting late. We have the dress rehearsal in the morning... ...and the big show tomorrow night. I say we get some sleep. Sure thing, Mr. Jones. [BOTH GASP] I will break you. [BOTH SHIVERING] We have adjoining rooms, Shaggy. You can go this way. See you in the morning. [SIGHS] He said he'll see me. - Hmm. - Ugh. Huh? Daph? - Trouble sleeping? - Ah, yeah. - Are you okay? What's wrong? - I'm fine. You're obviously not fine, Daphne. Why don't you tell me about it? I'm in love with Fred. There, I said it. Really? Wow, I never would have... Gosh, that's a shocker. I've kept it a secret for so long. I just had to tell someone. Shouldn't you be telling someone else? Like, maybe Fred? Oh, no. Oh, my gosh, no. I was hoping this competition would bring us closer... ...but even after all the time rehearsing and performing together... ...I just can't say anything. I even wrote a song, to that tune Fred composed. It explains how I feel about him. But if I think about singing it I feel like I'm going to throw up... ...or pass out or both. You have to tell him, Daph. You'll never know how he feels unless you talk to him. I can't. Maybe if I win Talent Star, that would give me the confidence. Maybe then I could talk to him. Velma, we have to win. We just have to. [SNORTING] SHAGGY: Scooby-doo, you awake? I can't sleep. Me neither. You want the bed? No. It's been almost two hours since we had that pizza and I'm starving, heh. Maybe the hotel has a vending machine or something. [ALL GASP] [SCREAMS] [CACKLING] [PHANTOM GROWLING] Dog! [SCREAMS] I touched a dog. I have dog bacteria. [BOTH GRUNT] [BOTH SHIVERING] [GRUNTS] - Like, take it easy there, Phantom dude. - Yeah. That's not taking it easy. That's taking it very, very hard. [PHANTOM GRUNTING] [PANTING] [BOTH SCREAMING] [GRUNTING] It's been cut. It's okay, everyone. He's gone. No harm done. Heh, everybody back to bed. Fantastic. This Phantom's gonna get us a 40 share. [BOTH SCREAM] Enough with the screaming. Gonna skin you alive. Good night. [BOTH SNIFF] - Hey, no lemons. - Yeah, you're right. A little baking soda and water will get that out. - I'm sure the hotel staff will... - No, no, no, please. I should get 45 minutes of scrubbing out of this. That smoke bomb seemed like something a magician would do... ...and The Great Pauldini's nowhere to be seen. True. But does he have a motive? This just keeps getting more and more mysterious. You know what the real mystery is? How did you get hold of a net so fast in the middle of the night? - Um, well, I... - You sleep with a net, don't you? Lots of people do. Aw, look at the little... - ...baby? - Gooby-gooby-goo. Okay, people. We've only got one dress rehearsal, so let's get it right. Chrissy Damon, you're up first. [BARB & LANCE ARGUING INDISTINCTLY] - DEWEY: Chrissy. - Ready. [SINGING] Stay away from my man, home-wrecker Nobody comes between me and my man Stay away Or I'll pummel you I'm a runaway train Don't think I won't fight you Don't think I'll lay down Don't think I won't punch you Right to the ground Noooo-wao-wao-wao-wao I will never rest Until you're far away My fists are gonna put you In a world of pain Stay away from my man BOTH: Hmm. For a girl her age, that song seems a little incredibly inappropriate. - Yeah. - Very incredibly. [APPLAUDING] Next is Emma Gale. Has anyone cleaned this microphone recently? - Like an hour ago? - Unbelievable. Are we savages? Oh, my gosh, she is amazing. Are you Emma's parents? Hey, Mike and Meg Gale, pleased to meet you. Boy, isn't she terrific? I think she's got a good shot at winning. Well, we sure hope so. Without that prize money the bank's going to take our farm. - Oh, that's terrible. - Yeah. It's been in our family for five generations. Mike's grandparents are buried there. So, uh, what are you two gonna do with the money if you win? Uh, just nothing really, just... I don't know. Um, could use some new seat covers for the van. Um, possibly a hat. - Hey there. - Fantastic, heh. I know we were a little unprepared before... ...but now we have got the act for you. Yeah. We are, hold for it... ...contortionists. Ta-da. All right, well, let's see what you got. [SCOOBY & SHAGGY SCREAM] [BOTH GASP] You might wanna go help your friends. They've gotten themselves a little tangled, heh. Fantastic. We need aspirin, a chiropractor and some baby oil. Right now. Okay. Next up, Lotte Lavoie. All right, all right. Throat spray. [SINGING OFF-KEY] [BOTH GASP] [COUGHING] [IN RASPY VOICE] Who did this to me? Who? Someone is going to pay for this. Someone is going to pay! Her throat has been sprayed with some kind of chemical irritant. There's no permanent damage, but you won't be able to sing for a week. I'm gonna sue you. And you. And you. And everyone! Somebody had better fix this or I am going to get mad! So do you think maybe the Phantom is behind this? Hmm. It could be. We're behind schedule, people. Next up are Blake and Jones. Okay, we'll keep an eye open for the Phantom. Don't worry about a thing. [SINGING] Rainstorm over the ocean Sunshine after the rain Clouds rise up from the water Nature's endless chain The world keeps on spinning From day into the night From season to season From darkness to light BOTH [SINGING]: Our lives keep evolving Through hope and despair I can take all the changes Knowing you're there We are like the rivers That join at the sea [SIGHS] Like, it's only Brick. [ALL SCREAM] It's enough for me It's enough for me - You guys were great. - Thanks. Sorry, sir. So sorry. Was that your new act? What are you, the human cannonball? [CHUCKLES] No, we thought you were the Phantom. What? Why would you think that? That's crazy. [CHUCKLING] Ah. The Great Pauldini. [APPLAUDING] Still no sign of the Phantom. Maybe the whole thing's over. Waldo and Hufnagel? Say, Hufnagel, are you an actor or a dummy? I don't know, what's the difference? He's so hot. - Aah, oh, my gosh, he's on fire. - Totally. No, I mean he's really on fire. Hey, Hufnagel, do you...? Smell something burning? Aah, ugh! [ALL GASP] [PHANTOM LAUGHS] PHANTOM: Christine must win! Security, find that Phantom. Find him, find him! Waldo? Hey, you're not leaving, are you, buddy? No, heh, I thought I'd stay and risk my life for a stupid talent show. Hey, that's fanta... Hey. WALDO: Of course I'm leaving. And the rest of you will too, if you have any sense. Ahem, my card. Give it to me. Come on, give it to me. [CHATTERING] DEWEY: Girlasaurus Rex! You're on. [SCOOBY GASPS] - We are... ALL [IN UNISON]: Girlasaurus Rex! [ALL SCREAM] [GASPS] One, two, one, two, three, four! [ALL GASP] Uh, strum, strum, twang! [ALL GASP] [PHANTOM LAUGHING] [ALL GASP] [YELLING] PHANTOM: Christine must win. [DEWEY & COLLETTE GASP] K.T.? Where is he? Where is he? K.T.: He's in the prop room. He's in the coffee... He's everywhere. What the heck? Don't worry. We'll find him. Let's split up. [BOTH GRUNT] Okay. The other way. [BOTH GUARDS GRUNT] Find him. Now, now, now, now. Right, we're out of here. Heh, ladies, where are you going? Come on. Dude, someone busted our instruments. What's next, our heads? - Think we can catch up with Waldo? - What do you mean, "we"? - Come back here. - We've gotta do something. - Velma, you've seen all the acts, right? - Yeah. Who you think the frontrunners are? I mean, of the ones that are left? Honestly? You guys, the violin girl and Chrissy. So if the Phantom wants Chrissy to win, he'll try to get rid of Emma and us. Velma, can you get Emma's parents to take her someplace safe? Sure. We're gonna set a trap for the Phantom. Daphne and I will be the bait. Oh, heh, good. I mean, yeah, whatever. Well, uh, we're gonna take a nap now. In our dressing room. Um, no one cares? Yeah, so, uh, we'll be asleep and napping. Just totally unprotected. - In our dressing room. Asleep. - Unguarded. - In our dressing room. FRED: Unguarded. - Hang tight. Something's bound to happen. - To you, right? Not to us? What? I'm just asking. Hey, it's a fair question. Just a matter of time now. [CLAPS] [MUMBLES] This is ridiculous. We've been waiting forever. And, Velma, would you get your elbow out of my ribs? I'm over here, Shaggy. SHAGGY: Then whose big elbow...? [PHANTOM GROWLS THEN CACKLES] [VELMA, SHAGGY & SCOOBY SCREAM] What is it? [STAMMERS] Phantom! [SHAGGY WHIMPERING] He must have gone through there. Like, I hate hidden passages. They never lead anywhere good. When's the last time we were in a hidden passage and it led to, like, miniature golf? VELMA: We're in the sewer below the Opera House. [RATS SQUEAKING] Like, these sewers have so many passageways, how are we gonna find...? Shh! [GRUNTS] [ORGAN PLAYING NEARBY] [ALL GASP] [SQUEAKING] Rats! [SCREAMS] [CHUCKLES] [YELPS] [GASPING] Huh? Aah! Bats! [ALL GASP] [ALL SCREAMING] [VELMA SCREAMING] [GASPS] Good thing this sweater is a cable-knit. [ORGAN PLAYING NEARBY] There it is again. This way. Ha! SCOOBY: Yipe! PHANTOM: I suppose it was only a matter of time until someone found me. Welcome to my home. I have lived here in the dank, reeking sewers all my life... ...forced to hide from society... ...to conceal the hideous, twisted mass of flesh that is my face. But now, I can hide no longer. Behold, the Phantom of the Opera! Um, you look fine. I what? I mean, you're no Brad Pitt or anything, but you're okay. But look. Gaze upon my foul, deformed visage. I'm hideous. Hideous. [SOBS] Dude, this is a funhouse mirror. It is? But this is the only mirror I've ever looked in. I mean, I don't have any others, and when I go out I always wear the mask. Hey, I look good. Well, this is embarrassing. Wow, uh, ehh! I wish I had the last 40 years back. Uh, so it's super awkward right now. I, uh... Anyway, yeah. - Mr. Phantom... - Steve. Steve Trilby. Uh, Steve. Why have you been sabotaging the talent show? The what now? Talent Star? The TV show? You wrecked instruments and set fire to a dummy, and... Not me. I haven't been up at all lately, except to get food. Is that why you were in our dressing room? That's the secret door to the vending machines. I like those burritos. The bean and cheese ones? But back in the '70s... Oh, yeah. I mean, I did some stuff back then. Stuff I'm not proud of. It was when they turned the Opera House into a disco. I had loved the opera so much. I can hear everything from down here. But that disco music made me crazy. And those ridiculous outfits the people wore. You know, the little neck scarf thingies and the mini-skirts and... Oh! But on you guys they work. Anyway, that was when I was young and impetuous. I haven't bothered anyone for almost 40 years now. Could I, um, see that mirror again? Look at me. I'm an Adonis. Guys, I'm pretty sure he's telling the truth. But if he isn't behind everything that's going on, then who...? [COLLETTE SCREAMING] [ALL GASP] [ALL GASP] Huh? Hello! Uh, kind of stuck up here. Oh! So could someone get a ladder, or something? What happened? The harness is part of my disappearing trick. I was working on it when the Phantom shoved me off that catwalk. Hey, what's that up there? Oh, no, it's the Phantom. [PHANTOM LAUGHS] I'm going after him. Watch the exits. - We'll put out the fire. - Yeah. [GASPS] [SHAGGY GRUNTING] Come on, work. Thanks, Scoo... Whoa! [SHAGGY SCREAMS] Like, double thanks. [FRED & PHANTOM GRUNT] DAPHNE: Aah! VELMA: Ow. You're squeezing my arm. [FRED GRUNTING] [PHANTOM LAUGHING] [PHANTOM GRUNTING] - FRED: Aah! - Look out! Ow. Quit it. [GRUNTING] [STEVE YELLS] [PHANTOM & STEVE SCREAMING] [PHANTOM GROANS] [VELMA, SHAGGY & SCOOBY GASP] VELMA: Mel Richmond? I think I'm dying. Um, actually I'm pretty sure you're okay. But look, I'm all bloody. There's some red paint on the... Do you understand how mirrors work at all? Give me a break, I grew up in a sewer. So you were gonna burn the place down for the insurance money? Yes. And I would have gotten away with it too... ...if it hadn't been for you meddling kids and your nosy dog. Dog? Where? - Zoinks! - Uh-oh! [SHAGGY & SCOOBY GRUNT] GUARD: Get back here. [MEL GRUNTS] Relax, Richmond. - Is this the guy? - That's him, officer. Mel Richmond. Wait. This still doesn't make sense. If you wanted the insurance money, why didn't you just burn the place down? - Why all the other stuff? - I didn't. But whoever did gave me the idea to put on this costume. Stupidest idea I ever had. [PHANTOM LAUGHING] [ALL GASP] PHANTOM: Christine must win! - What the heck? PHANTOM: Otherwise, I will rain death and destruction down upon this place! So swears the Phantom! Now will you take this seriously? I want as many officers as you can spare here for the show tonight. I was thinking the same. We're on it. So you'll do it? You'll put all your men on this? And can you keep that dog out of here too? PAULDINI: Hello! I still need a ladder! Hello! The Great Pauldini is not pleased! [SHAGGY & SCOOBY YELLING] Stop that dog. [WHISTLING NONCHALANTLY] Well, well, guess they got away because they're not here. Anywhere and aha! [GASPS] Darn it. [BOTH CHUCKLE] - Brick! - Aah! I wasn't doing anything. I was just in there. Not doing anything. I was doing something but it was nothing. Like, we have a totally great act for you. Oh. Oh! Uh... Well, fantastic. By all means, proceed. Say, Scooby-doo, what bone will a dog never eat? I don't know, Shaggy. What bone will a dog never eat? A trombone. [BOTH CHUCKLE] - Heh, yeah, that's fan... Security. - Aah! Scoob, what vegetable do you get when you cross a dog with a rose? - I don't know, Shaggy. - A collie-flower. [BOTH CHUCKLE] Dog! - Mr. Pimiento? - Blake and Jones. - Well, you must be happy. - Why? Your odds of winning are way up. Because there are only four acts left. Three. The Great Pauldini just quit. Heh, whatever. Anyway, the publicity the Phantom has generated has been fantastic. We're expecting our highest ratings ever. Come on, let me show you the projections. The sound room, huh? Still on. Hmm? So this would be heard on the stage. Interesting. Do you keep the footage all the cameras in here shoot? Well, of course. There's a whole digital database on the server. - Could I look through it? - Sure. But there's 2000 hours of footage in there. Oh, man. Now there's no way I'm gonna have time to go see the soap diamond. [CHATTERING] [AUDIENCE CHEERING AND APPLAUDING] Talent Star was starting to get old... ...but this Phantom thing has really spiced it up. If the Phantom shows up we might really see someone get hurt. Oh, I hope. I hope, heh. SHAGGY: There's a lot of police at the Opera House, Scooby. So if we're gonna get in, this disguise has gotta be a good one. And voila. Perfect. Like, I think this is gonna work, Scooby-doo. - Yeah. - Now repeat after me. - These kids today. - These kids today. - Darn newfangled contraptions. - Darn newfangled contraptions. Excuse me, sonny. Does this computer have an Internet in it? Excuse me, sonny. Does this computer have an Internet in it? By George, I think he's got it. [MUSIC PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS] [AUDIENCE APPLAUDING] BRICK: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Talent Star finals. I'm your host, the man, Brick Pimiento. Now, I'm sure you've all heard that we've had some trouble. [AUDIENCE GASP] Mm-hm, terrible business. Terrible. Because of this so-called Phantom, we're down to just three acts. Emma... Blake and Jones... ...and Chrissy. Fantastic, ha, ha. By the end of the show tonight, one will be crowned this year's Talent Star. The others receive a year's supply of Fudge-a-Roni. Fudge-a-Roni, the great taste of fudge with the convenience of roni. BOTH: Ooh! As you know, on Talent Star, you decide the winner. You can vote by text or online. Your votes will be tallied in real time and displayed on this scoreboard. Heh, and now, going out live all over the world, I give you Chrissy! [AUDIENCE CHEERING AND APPLAUDING] [MUSIC PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS] [SINGING] Stay away from my man, home-wrecker Nobody comes between me and my man Stay away - FRED: Got you. - Aah. [PHANTOM GRUNTING] You were right, Emma, you do make better bait than us. [BOTH SCREAM] [PHANTOM GROANS] DAPHNE: Lance Damon? So it was you all along? - When it wasn't Mel. - Ugh. I would have gotten away with it if it hadn't been for you meddling kids... ...and your nosy old guy? Thanks, we'll take it from here. Blake and Jones. You're on in 30 seconds. Brick. Blake and Jones have been cued. They'll be on in 30. [GASPS] These darn newfangled kids. Ugh, your grandfather smells like a dog. [SNIFFS] Yeah? Well, you smell like lemons. It's the hand sanitizer. - Lemons. - Lemons. Like the Phantom. [AUDIENCE CHEERING AND APPLAUDING] Ugh, one side, doofus. I killed out there. Heh, yeah, fantastic. Uh, by the way, they just arrested your dad, ciao. - Ugh. - Sweetheart, daddy's in trouble. I told that pinhead to watch his step. Idiots. Fantastic, Chrissy, just fantastic. Wow, look at those numbers. Up next, Blake and Jones. [AUDIENCE CHEERING AND APPLAUDING] [MUSIC PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS] [FRED PLAYING GUITAR] [SINGING] Rainstorm over the ocean Sunshine after the rain Clouds rise up from the water Nature's endless chain The world keeps on spinning From day into night From season to season From darkness to light Where's Dewey? I don't know. He's supposed to be here? - Where the heck is Dewey? - Like, nobody knows. Well, wherever he is, he's still wearing his headset. I can hear him. He's breathing hard. Sounds like he's running and muttering. Something about soap. But that's what he's always talking about so... - Mind if I borrow this? Thanks. - Hey. Hey, you, yes. Get me another earpiece. And a latte. Yeah, yeah, fantastic. Come on, Scoob. We've got to get to Dewey's office. - Soap. - Yeah. That's what he's talking about. The soap diamond. It's right around the corner. What the heck are you guys doing in here? Guys. Wait till you see this footage I found of... No time. Dewey. Phantom. Soap diamond. [SHAGGY & VELMA GRUNT] Dewey's the Phantom too. He told the police to assign everyone they have here. He must have done that so no one would be watching the mineralogical society. This way. Knock them dead, Emma. Is he saying anything? Oh, I can hear traffic. He's outside. Like, he just said "Got it." We might be too late. There. Dewey! Uh... [LAUGHS] I am the Phantom. I know nothing of this Dewey. Dude, we know it's you. You're still wearing your headset. Huh? Oh, darn. [DEWEY THUDDING AND GRUNTING] [ALL GROANING] The soap diamond. [CHUCKLES] No! Way to go, Scooby-doo. [ENGINE REVS] SHAGGY & SCOOBY: Uh-oh! [BOTH YELL] I want that diamond! [TIRES SCREECHING] DEWEY: Ha! [ALL GRUNT] [FRED SIGHS] To the Mystery Machine. [SCOOBY & DEWEY GASP] [DEWEY SCREAMING] [SPITS] Ugh, ew, ew! Ew! [GROWLS] [CACKLES] Yikes! Freddy, he's gaining on us. [GASPS] [SCREAMS] Ew, icky. He's still right behind us. Huh? [ALL GRUNT] [GASPS] [ALL GRUNT] [HORN HONKS] Heh, I can't watch. Thanks, Scoob. [VELMA & DAPHNE GASP] There's no way we can lose him. - He's just too fast. - Look out. [BRIDGE BELL RINGING] What are we gonna do? Give me that bag. [ALL GRUNT] [VELMA & DAPHNE GASP] [DEWEY YELLS] [ALL GROAN THEN GASP] Hold it right there. Like, heh, that's actually a pretty good suggestion. That is the cleanest sword I've ever seen. Thank you. Now I'll take that bag. Huh? [GRUNTS] The bag, hand it over. Why do you want this diamond so badly, anyway? DEWEY: I need it to complete my collection of cleanliness themed treasures. I've already stolen the Ammonia Lisa and the Sponge of Turin. So that was you. Uh-huh. But you need three things to make a collection. Three things. Two is just bookends. Now give me the bag. - No! - Dewey. [LAUGHS] [GASPS] [SCREAMING] Garbage. Unclean. Unclean. Ew, ew, ew! But I got the diamond. Oh, the soap diamond, gotta find it, gotta find it, ugh. Heh, I've got it. Ha, ha. Huh? Hmm, yuck, a slobbery dog bone. Ugh. Ooh, too bad. [POLICE SIREN WAILING] [CHUCKLES] And I would have gotten away with it if it hadn't been for you meddling kids... ...and your filthy, germy dog. [EMMA PLAYING VIOLIN] [AUDIENCE CHEERING AND APPLAUDING] Emma Gale, everyone. Fantastic. Just fantastic, heh. Hey, look at those numbers. Oh, it's going to be close. - Ugh. - Oh, it is going to be close. And the voting closes now. Fantastic. Fantastic. Unbelievable. It's a tie. Ladies and gentlemen, we're going to need a tie-breaking encore performance. Right here tonight, right after these messages. - This is... - Fantastic? Yes. A tie. Do you have another piece you can do? - Yeah, but Daphne and Fred. - What about them? They aren't here. They're chasing down another Phantom. - Another? - Apparently this time it's Dewey. Heh, always knew there was something not right about that guy. - You. You're the new assistant director. - Sir, you won't regret this- Don't care. Emma's up after the break. We'll just hope Blake and Jones get back in time. Go. OFFICER: Blake and Jones? - That's us. - We caught... - Dewey Ottoman. Yeah, that Brick guy called, we know everything. - Here's the soap diamond, officer. - Good work. Now, hop in. You tied with the violin girl so you gotta do a tie-breaker. We'll take you back to the show. - Oh, heh, you don't have to do that. - Yes, I do. I got 50 bucks on you to win. [SIREN WAILING] So Dewey was the Phantom who "faded away" in that stairwell. - How did he do that? - I checked the camera in the stairwell. He had made a video loop of the empty stairwell... ...and spliced it into the camera feed. Of course. So when he ran in there... He activated the loop with a remote... ...switching the view on the monitor to the empty stairwell... - ...and making it look like he disappeared. - Very clever. But, guys, you'll never guess what I found... ...when I went through all the backstage camera footage. This is gonna blow your socks off. [EMMA PLAYING VIOLIN] [AUDIENCE CHEERING AND APPLAUDING] Fantastic, Emma, just fantastic. And look at those numbers. Now it's Blake and Jones's turn and... Well, heh, apparently, they are not in the building. - So it looks like they forfeit their... GUARD: You can't bring that dog in here! [ALL GASP] Hold it right there. That dog was instrumental in the apprehension of a dangerous felon. Uh, you can bring that dog in here. Come on. We have to make some arrangements. [GASPS] BRICK: Ladies and gentlemen, Blake and Jones are here for their tie-breaker. - Where were you? - We caught another Phantom. Fantastic, just fantastic. - How many does that make now? - Three. - Four if you count the original Phantom. STEVE: Call me Steve. Fantastic work. Fantastic. Are you ready for your tie-breaker performance? We have to do our song again? Well, no, you have to do another song, heh. Grab your guitar, you're on. Blake and Jones, ladies and gentlemen. Aren't they fantastic? What are we gonna do? We didn't rehearse anything else. I know. We don't have another song. - Wait. Yes, we do. - What? You know that song you wrote? Well, I wrote some words for it. - You did? Why didn't you tell me? - Just start playing. This will work. - It has to. - Blake and Jones, ladies and gentlemen. [AUDIENCE CHEERING AND APPLAUDING] [FRED PLAYING GUITAR] What is it now? You're going to help us with a little surprise. [SINGING] We've been close a long time As close as friends can be But in my heart's a secret For only you and me I've tried to tell it many times But my nerves got in the way Well, I can't wait another night To say whatl must say I love you [SINGING] I love you I love you, yes, I do BOTH: I love you [AUDIENCE CHEERING AND APPLAUDING] BRICK: Fantastic! Look at the scoreboard. Oh. Fred. Say, Fred, what bone will a dog never eat? I don't know, Daphne. A trombone. [BOTH LAUGH] [CHATTERING] Say, Fred, what vegetable do you get when you cross a dog with a rose? - I don't know, Daphne. - A collie-flower. [BOTH LAUGH] [AUDIENCE GASP] SHAGGY: What the heck are they doing? - They're throwing the contest. So Emma can win and her family can keep their farm. Oh, that is so sweet. Say, Fred, what did the dog say to the tree? - I don't know, Daphne! - Bark! [BOTH LAUGH] [AUDIENCE BOOING] Well, that was uncomfortable, heh. All right. The voting closes... Now! Fantastic. The winner is Emma Gale. [AUDIENCE CHEERING AND APPLAUDING] [MUSIC PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS] Congratulations, Emma. Fantastic. Just fantastic. And Blake and Jones, you may not have won... ...but congratulations on catching all of the Phantoms. - All of them, every last one. - Not quite all. Velma, roll the footage. [BRICK LAUGHING] [GASPS] [CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY] - That's enough, Pimiento. - Wait, you don't understand. I had to do it. The ratings have been dropping for years. I needed the publicity. You don't know what it's like, being around all you talented people all the time... ...and being me. What am I good at? Nothing. All I do is smile and say "fantastic" a lot. - I'm pathetic. - Come on, Pimiento. I would have gotten away with it, if it hadn't been for... Those meddling kids and their nosy dog. Yeah, yeah, we know. - You figure this is the last one? - I don't know. Hey, is anyone else the Phantom? Show of hands? Yeah, looks like we got them all. You guys owe me 50 bucks. - Uh... - So, heh... Well, a big thank-you to all our contestants. Live from Chicago, this is Steve Trilby for Talent Star, saying... ...if you've got the talent, we've got the star. Good night, America. This guy's good. [AUDIENCE APPLAUDING] Scooby-dooby-doo! [CHUCKLES] We're just gonna run in and pick up some snacks! - Yeah! - Don't go overboard! WOMAN [ON TV]: It was announced today... ...that Talent Star will be returning for a tenth season. Outgoing host Brick Pimiento will be replaced by Steve "The Phantom" Trilby. - Huh, didn't see that coming. - Me neither. It's driving me crazy! Did he kiss me because he really likes me... Oh! ...or was it all part of the show? And does he know that I really like him? How many times to I have to say it? Just talk to him! Huh? Guys! I told you not to go overboard! I know, that's why we just got a couple little things. What's up, buddy old pal? Is something bugging you? It's driving me crazy. Did she kiss me because she really likes me or was it all part of the show? And does she know that I really like her? How many times do we have to say it? BOTH [IN UNISON]: Just talk to her! - So anyway, um... - Hey, I was just... - Oh, you go ahead. - Oh, heh, no, you go ahead. Okay. Uh, Fred, I just, you know, wanted to talk to you. - Yes? - Fred, I like... Oh, my gosh! Have you heard about this? Some kind of monster's been spotted at Goose Lake! It's just a few miles from here. - Wow. - We should definitely look into that... ...right away, it could be something really big. All right, everybody. Let's check out the Goose Lake monster. [GASPS] [CHUCKLES] Scooby-dooby-doo! [English - US -SDH] |
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