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Semma Botha Aagatha (2018)
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'Awesome' 'Good times around the corner' 'Auspicious days will favor' 'Alandur Trichy' 'A new innings and fresh beginnings' 'Joys to bloom anew All your dreams will come true' 'This house will soon revel fame and fortune as well' 'Lo and behold! Auspicious events will unfold' Near a temple and a lake... ...like Goddess Lakshmi, a spouse for the prince of this house The perfect bride In case she doesn't show up... ...bad events should follow So says our own Delphi, Jakkamma 'A canopy should be raised in front of this house' Food should be served to one and all 'Whether the future holds good or bad for the family...' '...rests in the hands of the lady of this house' 'It is the oracle of Jakkamma' 'Happy days are round the corner' Aravalli akka, what's news? Last night I believe our local soothsayer... ...predicted good events will follow or else misfortune will fall upon you? Were you eavesdropping? As if that's my occupation all the time! I come from a better lineage than that The wind just carried his words into my ears! Good event means a wedding What does he mean by misfortune? My funeral! Why are you cursing yourself? As if it can't be your son Kuzhandhai's wedding? I know of a girl in a 'cow dung' family Why don't we finalize that alliance for your son? I want to ask our astrologer if wedding bells will ring for him - Good idea - See you 'Please come and sit here' - Give me the horoscope - Greetings, sir 5th house is occupied by sun, moon and venus 7th and 8th houses [mutters under his breath] Horoscope is like Lord Krishna's! You can find him amidst girls always No, it's the opposite Girls make a beeline to him! Tomato...tomato...tomato...! 'We have arranged item-wise' 'Please come and buy our tomatoes' Don't you have Bangalore tomato? We don't buy from a state which denies water to us Buy fresh ones from Tamil Nadu Don't start by getting into trouble Come, madam Tomato...toma- Tomato...tomato! Pure and fresh red tomatoes Tomatoes, dear Full of cheer! Tomato...tomato He has to be on a job 24x7x366! At the same time he won't stick to the same job True, he gets bored easily 'Fish...fish...fish!' Cat fish, Butter fish Indian spiny loach 'Please come ATM also available' 'Fish...fish...fish' Cat fish Indian spiny loach Fish...fish...! 1st cater to the men's needs They've been waiting for too long 'They won't look at me!' I know why your brain is working this way! You guessed So do it He has business acumen to even sell stale stuff You bet! In case he's unable to sell the fish- Dried fish...dried fish! 'Dried fishes of all sizes and shapes' Dried anchovy, dried ribbon fish, dried tilapia fish So smooth, you won't feel the fish, beer, rice or your life slip by! You can even use it as dowry With guarantee and warranty How can you offer warranty for dead fish? Business tactics Knowledge? He can't read and I can't tell the time Bro, 1 tea With one vada Don't lean on me, you mop-head! 'As if he's Shakespeare Pretending to read!' He'll read newspapers in Telugu, Malayalam and Hindi word to word Telugu, Sachin- Bro, finished seeing the photos? No cool news to relax or hot news to drool! You must read only Malayalam news You read so many papers daily On the whole what is the news? The same news is expressed by all of them creatively No variety, huh? 8 hours ago... ...what we read in Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp is refurbished 8 hours later they print this Newspapers were the source of news for us But now we feed news to the Press! Where is the country? - He beats uncle Scrooge hollow! - Bang on! Won't even extend his hand to anyone Bro, how are you? I don't shake hands I'll lose my power! - How is business? - You're bad at this, get lost Not only bold but also brave I'm worse than hero Kamal Haasan! - What do you mean? - In bravery! If I lose a nail, you'll lose your arm His stars will make his tongue run He'll spin yarns too He has been going in circles Around the same girl for the past 3 years (humming a film song) Stop, Gayathri Hi - Wait - Why are you hounding me? I don't know why I'm in love with you But I love you I hate seeing your face Please go away Just a minute You hate the sight of me But don't find me repulsive, right? My folks find me offensive quite often I turn a deaf ear to even that! Go...go...off you go! What about his wedding? Generally people face problems only after marriage But for him... ...marriage is the vortex of his problems! Will any untoward incident happen because of this? Yes Plenty! He has to be on his guard He is likely to get married only for the next 3 months He crosses that, he won't marry for another 6 years So he has to get married within 3 months? 'Story-Screenplay-Direction Vallikanth' 1 minute, wait, Gayathri [humming] Gayathri, please stop - Gayathri - Yes - Someone is following her - Yes How many times to tell these boys to flirt with a pretty face? Gayathri, wait Smart Alec, stop! How long have you been hounding her? 3 months I've been in love and following her for 3 years I saw her on January 1st On 14th wished her 'Happy Pongal' and smiled She walked away silently and next day wished me That was my friend's birthday On April Fool's day she claimed she had never loved me My friend Omagundam chided me and told me to ditch her - I broke up - With me, not her! Breaking up with your best friend is the worst thing to go through The day I apologized to him... ...was Telugu New year's day! Told her I'll never trouble her again 1 week...! I couldn't take it Though I went in so easily I couldn't come out - Were you locked in? - On April 14th I met her again She was mad at me, I said, 'Be angry, but don't hate me' - He praised my dialogs - Me, huh? After that, Labor's day, Ramzan, Independence day - Lord Krishna's birthday - Ganesha's birthday! All the festivals in our calendar He greeted his girl even for your grandma's funeral! Why make him babble? Even Diwali, Milad un-Nabi, and Christmas- The festival of lights in Tiruvannamalai He goes quite often Even on Children's day I am running behind her like a kid So she is my girl Looking at her, ogling, spying on her, drooling ...making a pass, honking Don't try any of these with her - That's my job - We are jobless anyway! Whose side are you on? - You - Then hit him Hey! Why tell me all this? How dare you retort! Why did you hit me? Buffalo! Punch him Get lost Rascal! - Like it? - No Is that why you stuffed yourself? Hunger knows no taste - Did you see my horoscope? - Yes, I did You told everyone, if I don't marry within 3 months ...I won't get married for the next 6 years? Yes, I said so You should've told me first Now I've wasted 6 days Only 2 months and 24 days left Why ruin my life, ma? You were following a girl! I thought I'll clinch that alliance That won't work Shall I try talking to her? You've been in love or what? To find a bride for you I don't have to fall in love Being a girl is enough But she should be a girl, right? Who...? I sent men to hit you? Who is your son? How can you ask me this?! - Don't you know my son? - No Hey, come here He's my son Hey, if you like him say 'yes' Otherwise say 'no' Don't laugh derisively I can't help laughing looking at your son! Does she think she is God's gift to mankind? Hey! Who the hell is he? Hey, I have no clue who he is 2 or 3 fellows followed me One of them must have hit him For your stupid face, 2 or 3 chaps hit on you? Don't pick a fight with me Ask whoever hit him Don't you dare yell at me My son- Why do you interrupt our conversation? Let me 1st talk to her Then your turn Do you love my son or not? 3 chaps are interested in me Which is your son? My son has been in love with you for 3 years, don't you know him? I know chaps who are in love for 4 or 5 years diligently I don't know them This bashed up face is also one among them What is this, son? Kuzhandhai, come here Find out what's in her mind This chap, huh?! If you're disrespectful I'll clobber you All that's fine, do you love my son or not? I don't love him nor anyone else Okay, you don't have to be in love at all Why get into that unholy mess? Also time is running out We'll fix the wedding straight away, pick a date Wedding...? Are you deaf or what? Didn't hear me? Are you a mother or a mack? Don't be so offensive, Gayathri Get lost! - Why are you begging her? - She just insulted me Instead of defending me you're pleading! - Poor amma! - Get lost! 'Amma, where are you rushing to?' 'Don't do anything drastic, ma' Why are you yelling? - This is my house - You run and save her I'll hang myself to death Please come out, ma This isn't our house A female insulted me in the most vile manner Instead of slapping her cheek...?! I can't live hereafter I'll die Why do you hurt me like this? I am worried for her - Old lady, move - Clear out I'll just hang myself Why should I be insulted because of you? Why should I live having given birth to a son like this? Take out the tiles Why are you removing the tiles? To give cable TV connection! - She's about to hang herself - Commit suicide, huh? Gayathri, if that lady commits suicide... ...I'll make sure you vacate Go, bang the door Have you gone to the police station? Ma, why are you doing this? 'Don't come this side Sit over there' This has become a routine for you You come out - I can't cut it, get down - I'll hang myself Don't untie it 'Narrow escape' Why do you do this, ma? This is the 93rd time You try to commit suicide every 2nd day Trying to pacify you is real torture Your silly prank will end in disaster one day If any door is open... '...you step in with a rope to hang yourself!' - Brother? - What...? 93rd time, huh? She does this often? Not often, uncle All the time That's her entertainment She'll do it twice a month Usually in a relative's house But this time, lucky you! That lady is mad as hell and running That's a different lead We'll know tonight What lead? Nosey parker! You'll go deaf if I hit you! Amma! Step mother!! 'Why is she hogging like this?' Looks like I won't have any dinner left - 'Let me taste 1 dried fish' - Take your hands off 'Delicious!' 'No wonder she's relishing it' Amma...? What happened to you? Why did you want to die? You should deep fry dead dried fish And be alive to cherish us eating it with relish! 'She cares two hoots!' Why did you want to die? I'll hit you with my broomstick Kuzhandhai Let's go see that girl from that 'cow dung' family at least once How can I set my heart on another girl right away? I fell so quickly in love I can't come out that easily Just open the door and step out What silly excuses! - Ma, what happened to you? - Junk fellow! 'Are you a mother or a mack?' 'Ma, why are you doing this?' Ma, why are you sleeping at night? Spoiling my sleep! I don't know what you'll do We'll meet the girl you suggested Fix that alliance and I'll marry her 'What happened to him?' 'Keeps changing his mind!' We haven't seen the bride You're talking of dowry! What's wrong with my son? Then why don't you bring him on a horse? Where are both the grandmas off to? To buy coconut Why has this maid caked her face with make up? Howzzat?! We are seeing a bride for my son Kuzhandhai I am so glad to hear this Wish you luck I am still a bachelor This bride has a sister? Sridevi...my dear? - Come, dear - Kamal Haasan is waiting! She is coming Why keep nudging me? Do you have the habit of going to the gym? - Did you notice? - Yes, I did You like this 'Miss Bun', huh? She doesn't seem the right catch for you, kindly avoid Why are you saying so? Beautiful girls are like lightning They will vanish in a flash She is like a lamp She will light my life steadily Who can change your fate? Go, stick your head on the rail track! Keep quiet! Where does the groom work? He's a commando in the army! - I was just being funny - Shut your mouth He's a vegetable dealer 'He is very sincere in his job' His job changes according to the season He'll sell fish He'll dry left over fish and make money in that too - Retail business? - He's such a big scientist! I told you to reject her right in the beginning She's rejecting you It's such a shame! Forget it We are thick skinned when we get insulted, that's all Some are lucky in their 1st attempt Others may have to try 2 or 3 times Will take off in course of time Keep try Keep on try What do we do next? Look for the next bride! What a lousy job Like a roadside Romeo! 'Orange...orange...orange' Please come and buy Fresh orange orange 1 kilo is Rs 50 but we give you a discount, only Rs 40 Hello, Ranjitha How is Swami Nithyananda? Orange...orange...or- Malgova...ripe mango, exotic! Make up your mind Are we selling oranges or mangoes? Aunty turned our orange into mango! Her husband is coming out of jail Want him to go back?! Malgova...orange...orange...! How much longer will we yell and sell, road to road? To sell tomatoes for 5 and 10 bucks, is a back breaking job Let's plan something I agree Even if we earn no one respects us That's why I can't even find a bride easily Let's take a magnificent shop in a market for lease in Chennai Get into wholesale business Let's do it Long live India! - Trust your mother to call - Pick up Tell me, ma 'We are seeing a bride in Ponmalai' 'Come home early' Only you can do this, ma Only yesterday a girl rejected him That scar hasn't healed as yet Won't he feel bad if you see another girl? I won't feel bad Give me the phone No scar or bar, ma All that's healed Let's go tomorrow, ma Only 2 months left Please mom 'Okay, let's go' I'm feeling giddy Give me an orange Look who is coming Our dear motor-mouth! Hello, Aravalli akka Where are you off to with son and monkey? - Wine shop - Coming? 'Seeing' a bride for my son What is this? If it's just once, it's alright But does it look good if you keep announcing you're bride hunting? 'Charcoal' is going overboard What about the girl from the 'cow dung' family I suggested? That girl did not like my son selling vegetables - Really? - Don't disturb amma and that ghost Her walk reminds me of a pumpkin rolling Let her keep rambling If we say we are vegetable vendors we will be looked down upon Say it as 'market' in English, no- Add 'ing' to 'market' and say he is into Share Marketing What if they ask details? From the market, we share Keep it simple, okay? I'll do all the talking Follow me silently 'Malliga, when did you come?' Hey, don't forget my improvization Zip your lips, eh? Karunkuzhali Come and greet our guests 'She's hidden like the heroine in Bharathiraja's films' 'Show your bright face soon' Greet everyone, my dear Icing on the cake! She has powdered her face with coal Even I don't like her Let's scoot That's alright Color can be corrected She has good features Like my mother - He's insulting you! - How could you? Keep quiet, ma Just 2 months left for me to decide Or else I must wait for 6 years I can't be celibate for so long - Leave it - Let me say 'yes' You'll resort to Family Planning! What's the groom doing? We are busy talking I wanted to know your profession Ah...yes...work - We are into marketing - Yes Marketing? - What is that? - You nitwit! Share marketing, huh? - Yes...yes - Exactly! He isn't dim at all! Share marketing is dicey Suddenly rises Fluctuates a lot Is it an elevator? 'Many big shots have invested heavily and committed suicide' In the last 6 months 25 suicides in Tamil Nadu 216 in India In the global level, 989 victims died because of this share market - Beautiful! - Clap for him I've invested in millions Lost every single penny And now renting this run-down house You didn't die, huh? 'It's like gambling' The groom I'm looking for... ...can even be a peddler selling vegetables or even dried fish! 'Traitor! You used big sounding words' Even if he earns Rs 200 a day ...he should stand on his own feet He should be self sufficient And work hard Head is spinning, eh? I'll smear dung on your face when we step out Trying to add fuel to the fire? Get up, let's go 'Appaaaaa' Let's escape Listen, God often tests only the good hearted Definitely Why did he target you? Bad God This too shall pass! It went above my head If tomorrow I become like Ambani ...such experiences will be useful for my autobiography I should fill at least 250 pages A book with only 65 pages will be a damp squib! My autobiography shouldn't be a song book It must be part of the school syllabus Call her, unable to bear this insult she's planning to hang herself Ma...amma! Don't try suicide again, ma We can't rescue you from the rooftop, ma Listen to me If we save her we are in for a dried fish feast! Maaaa! High five! Please pump water for me too Yesterday she had such a long face 'What is bothering you Aravalli akka?' I asked 'Not 1 girl wants to marry my son' she said Who will fall for her son? Don't you agree? Thinking he's Mr World or something, she is so damn picky That black pot will only get a matching kettle! Kuzhandhai, don't be upset There's someone for you out there 100% she will be devoted to you She will love only you till her last breath We just have to find out where she lives! Why are you staring at me? Come here What happened? My wife beat me up, sir That's common in most houses Tomorrow is our MLA's wedding Make all the arrangements I'll come and collect the payment "Cash, dough, dollar, rupee, money Peso, pound, paisa, paper money" How can they waste that cake? Why are you back so soon? What's this decoration in aid of? Hey...'Attack'! Head deep in debts and you show off with false prestige! What about the catering order? MLA cancelled the wedding order He fixed a big catering firm from Madras Whether local or out-of-towner the basic recipe cannot be changed! But no one can beat my flavor I'll get my daughter married in this same town with a feast to remember! Shelve your daughter's wedding aside You haven't paid interest for 2 months You settle that first If not this MLA, some other politician, if not A, then B I'll fleece someone and settle my debts Let's play a game of cards "Don't look down upon girls, buddy" "Don't you have sisters, tell me?" 'Rotten tomatoes!' Not a single girl in this town is suitable for us I've received an alliance 40 km from here Let us go and look up that girl We have done this so often, ma How many girls will reject me! Usually a video is shot of the wedding But I have shot my life in all possible angles And I have a portfolio You show my photo and I'll come once they agree I've crossed that stage with them You just have to decide Let's just see her in person She's right Tomorrow is a holiday We'll make it a jolly trip Let's go with a mindset she'll reject and humiliate you How will you be upset? Am I being funny? I'm ridiculing him and he's laughing I don't like this formality, ma You tell the whole world about it When every girl I see rejects me I feel so humiliated, ma So do we! I won't tell a single soul, dear - Swear on a stack of betel leaves - I'll go and get it What new nonsense is this? What is this promise? Go freshen up, sleepy face! Like father like son! She pampers him and dances to all his tunes Promise me now - You too - I promise Regarding formally 'seeing' a bride for you, I swear - We won't blab to anyone - We will blabber! What did you say now? His hearing is sharper than a knife We won't blabber Listen to my idea to keep this under wraps Got it? Go now So tough to get 1 square meal here Ma, I'm going to Trichy for my friend's wedding 'He's so depressed, he is forever in a groom's attire' 'We should also be on our guard I think' 'Why is this pregnant pig coming towards us?' Why are you walking without 'Kuzhandhai'? If I was married kids would tag along - You don't wave your wand - Fat hopes! He thinks he is funny Not 'Kuzhandhai' as in 'kid' but your friend Don't know where he is I'm off to the market You're wagging your tongue too much I'll stuff and snuff you in this sack You and your amphora-mouth! - She's a bad influence! - He called me a frog-mouth, huh? Akka, in this same way my mother-in-law ridiculed me She hinted I croak like a frog I lost my cool one day I mind my own business, no? She provoked me I picked up the grinding stone and smashed it on her head And closed her chapter Now she smiles at me from a photo! Hey! Paechi I'm off to the temple Keep an eye on my house Okay , akka Pray for me too Wonder whose head will roll today New trick, huh? Akka, something fishy in their stories All 3 of them are spinning different tales Maybe they are seeing another bride for him? As if the stink of a dead fish can't be sniffed! How are you, Aravalli'ka? Where are you going? Got the ticket? The chap in the next stop who gets in will buy Let me add the BGM here [humming] 'I hate your face Turn away' 'Look at your face in the mirror first!' 'They are sitting very casually' Sister, is he the one? 3 tickets to Allur Money? The chap in the next stop who gets in will pay Shameless! 3 tickets Rs 18 You are a group of 3 Why sit separately? We have a vow to fulfill for Lord Ganesha - Mind your business - You look like Ganesha! 'Allur Tanjore' How much farther? My legs are hurting Will you ask that man? - Which is Balu's house? - 'Attack' Balu, huh? The yellow house over there 'Attack' Balu Even the name spells danger! 'MLA's son is coming' Greetings, brother 'Who is he?' 'Looks like a computer graphics toy!' 'Why has he covered his face with a moustache?' The mother looks like she will take good care of our daughter But his friend looks like a boogeyman Looks like this is a decent family Even after looking at the father's face? Don't joke How are you? I'm fine Buddy, your search ends here How are you so sure? Obvious from the parents' faces The girl will be sad she was born to them Imagine how my sister will look, if I had one 'How will his sister look?' Beyond imagination Same with your bride now Magizhini, serve coffee to our guests, dear You can sniff the aroma of my daughter's coffee 10 towns away Is he your real father? Did you take a good look? You bet I did She's soooper How can I even express my joy? Click a snap, quick I'll need it later for 1st look I'll make it a teaser! Just ensure her father's wild face doesn't butt in She looks good Why are you fiddling with the phone? Uploading aunty-virus You go inside To hit on another man's wife is a crime - Another man's wife - Of course She'll anyhow reject you Then she'll marry someone else Let's scoot before she chases us out I'll go first You follow next 'Attack' uncle, I'll step out to take a call from USA No rush, take your own sweet time 'I am unable to bear your torture!' She's a stunner She'll reject me for sure, huh? It's a feather in your cap if such a stunner rejects you It will add to our family pride I'm okay even if she rejects Hello, buddy, buy a big bottle of booze for tonight 'What's the occasion?' So-so looking girls reject him left and right This one is a chic chick She'll surely say 'no' Call the gang and be ready - 'For what?' - To lament as usual This groom should say 'okay' God...somehow make her say 'yes' 'God, make her agree I'll light a special lamp for You' Do you like the groom? - I like him - Shall we agree? I like him as well - What now? - Wait patiently Let them open up We can fix the date My daughter- We think so too Even you like her? She likes me? We can fix an auspicious day next week for the engagement He is agreeing to this alliance? Fix it on a day the market is closed We run a wholesale business We will be slightly busy Heavy loss even if we shut our business for a day Yes, uncle, very soon we intend opening a branch in Chennai So we get vegetables delivered daily Sure, aunty You just need to pay I just committed a big order Can be settled next month Don't turn up at my doorstep He's asking for some money These chaps thrive on bad timing! You should be in the right state of mind to give money, right? Buddy, did you notice? Of course, I did Looks like we hit the jackpot This will be our personal bank You get married first We'll usurp everything We are very happy Have a safe trip back home I don't normally shake hands I will lose my power, right? He will give his hand only to our daughter, note that point? Of course I did Thank you Godspeed Uncle, wake up your mother She's fast asleep 'Simpering idiot!' - Wait - Why? Turn back and see her Why? I think of you as Cupid Don't lose your touch! I know the girls from our village will hide behind a window and eye the groom Are you sure? My dear lad "With her 'squid' eyes she caressed me" "My heart most willingly set itself on fire soulfully" "Her waist tempting Her bosom tantalizing" "My head and mind went a-reeling with this enchanting feeling" "Was she created from clouds cottony?" "This temptress makes my mind spin dizzy" "I am her 'kumkum' red on her pretty forehead" "She devoured me whole heart, body and soul" "She kills me, this darling without any warning" "I've lost myself; helplessly Let me know if you find me" "Butted by her bovine eyes shall I die with a happy sigh?" "Bewitched by this darling shall I scorch in her breath sizzling?" "Like spinach her silken tresses" "This warrior has fallen defenseless for the eyes of this princess" "She is the soothing smoke in my beedi" "She is the froth in my beer spiritedly" "She's the heroine I every film I see" "Daughter-in-law is she on TV soaps soppy" "If she comes home you know thunder storm will also follow" "If she stands near me, my dear like the 'bachelor button' flower" "I need soda sprinkled on me for I'll faint in sheer ecstasy" "Like a lithe banana stem is this lassie" "I befriended her to make her my lady" "She's no 'dosa' ordinary But roasted crisp with ghee" "Trust me She's so tasty" "She is sweet watermelon juice I'm just a lame, useless piece" "No one can hold a candle near my darling angel here" "You're my yearning daily like the 1st sip of morning tea" "With her dove eyes, she touched me" "My heart lit aflame spontaneously" "Her dainty waist tempting Mountainous curves tantalizing" "My heart and mind a-reeling I'm left with no other feeling" "Was she woven from clouds cottony?" "This glamdoll makes my mind spin wantonly" "I am her 'kumkum' red on her fair forehead" "She swallowed me whole heart, body and soul" "She kills me, this darling without any warning" "I've lost myself; hopelessly Let me know if you find me" - Rasathi is missing? - Kuzhandhai's wedding That's the talk of the town Aravalli akka, you think we are here to watch a film? You went to see a bride for your son We are very keen to know what was the outcome Why don't you give us a detailed account? As if you are letting me talk The girl we saw is like an angel! She is highly qualified A daughter-in-law who goes camping? It is 'comp-ooter' Are you still stuck in this village? What are you old cronies doing sitting here on this porch? Hey Kuzhandhai We are happy you're getting married You should be wearing a silk shirt like a groom You're wearing a shirt that looks like our skirt! Okay, I'll wear your skirt as a shirt or cover myself as a bedspread Forget that, grandma Why do you have a traffic signal on your forehead? - Sooper - What rubbish! All the chatterboxes and old hags go and do something useful Hey old football, clear out Sweet is ready and so is Gayathri's rivet to nail her! Blaze of fire, bro Close in on her, go Get down now! Why are you following me? Didn't like your face So following your back! I told your mother I don't want to marry you - Now what? - Bro, pass the sweets Sweet, huh? - Take 1 and share 50-50 - Birthday, huh? Be blessed Who are you to bless me? Thank you for rejecting me I've seen a girl who resembles an angel Imagine, waiting for you to reciprocate Then taking you out on a date 'He loves going blah blah blah' Get married and walk with our kids on the road Bah! Disgusting to even think of all that Is your head spinning? If you talk like this even my body will spin! It has to spin How often I've circled you! 99% of the boys run behind girls more than the earth rotating This is his own dialog Look here with your eyes wide open Take a good look Don't grimace Get lost! Why waste our time! Anyone will be scared seeing your face! "Into my life walked an angel No more hassles, only miracle" Who is our next target? Coal powder face Karunkuzhali Looks like Trichy bus stand Gate is missing Karunkuzhali's father Come out Why are you sleeping at such an odd hour? - That's routine - Is that so? - Hey, come out - Make it fast Don't we have other houses to visit? Whole family is dark Come out, you wig head! What brings you here so late, with a trousseau tray? I told you right then I don't approve of a groom working in the share market Did you know the shares of most companies are rock bottom now? We haven't come to finalize this alliance - We are here to thank you - Why? I have found a girl like an angel Hey Pig-face! - Don't call him that in front of me - Sorry, bro He thinks he is Bill Gates Sharing news on shares Look at this pseudo-nerd face! You invested in the share market Do you have the receipt? 3 coffees, 6 fritters Totally Rs 54 We came the other day Take it You missed out 2 bottles of water - 2 bottles? - Yes [muttering] - Rs 94 then - Tips Rs 6, huh? Let them share Rs 3 each Don't go near her I told you not to go near her You never listen Take the flower out of your hair Bro, this spirit-face is my mother-in-law to be? This fritter face my father-in-law? Aiyaiyo! Disgusting to even imagine it! He is taking a royal dig at you You're standing like a buffalo Take this and make juice for your family - Become fair at least then - Charcoal family! Who is she? Stick-face! 1 minute I never rejected you I thought this tin-box was the groom and said 'no' If I you are the groom... ...I am 'double okay'! - What a crappy family! - My 9 planet-mascot! I was wandering with Saturn by my side! I must thank my friend and not you Thank you, bro You saved me Now that you've seen my best friend, see you! Didn't you shoot my 'making' trailer? Show it to her family Trailer isn't necessary 'First look' will do Take a good look This is my bride Look at it as long as you want She'll soon belong to me 'Show it to her father' Had your fill? She is an angel - He's deriding me, ma - Get lost! Crowd, disperse 'Show is over' 'Why are they both hitting on him?' What's with you, huh? Kuzhandhai is 'sold out' Don't get it? Kuzhandhai is no longer available, clear out Jobless females! - I want to dance now - Is it so? - You should join me - Show me This is too tough for me Will you follow me? "My mother's earring, 'jumki' my father stole discreetly" "My mother guzzled quid pro quo my father's beer in toto" That vegetable vendor has got an angel for a bride Yesterday his mother Aravalli was sitting on her porch Bragging away to glory she has found an angel for her son What gives her so much joy rubbing salt on others' wounds? Let's see how long she will keep bragging 'Torture started, huh?' '200000 loan shark!' 50,000! Why don't you pick that darn phone? As soon as 5th of every month dawns all the loan sharks call me - Switch it off - Is it okay if they come home? I want my breakfast soon I'll shower and eat Inform 'Attack' Balu the headcount from our side Hello uncle, it's me Kuzhandhai Hello, Kuzhandhai Is it aunty? Aunt, where is uncle? Uncle is in the restroom - Hello - Hello Your voice is garbled I'll give you another number Note it down I don't believe this! I can't hear - Hey stupid fellow - Stupid huh? [whispering] Who is it, dear? Our relative What happened to your voice? Money lender Don't tell him I am here Bro, aunt is a little weird Wants me to call her in another # Won't you talk to her hereafter? How can I? You think she is testing me? I should be extra careful now Ganesan Moorthy Subbhaiya Your sister has to be present - What do we do? - Too late now! No one wanted to marry me Won't anyone volunteer to be my sis? Shall I bring my girlfriend? She is like a sister to you We can all go in a van Why hire a van for the 'flower' ritual? Ask them to come by bus directly Then your guests won't turn up Is that okay? Keep quiet We should spend for our function She beats Uncle Scrooge hollow! Aunt is calling from her # now It's wrong only if she calls from another number, talk to her - I'll talk later - Pick up the call What are you both whispering about? - Nothing, ma - Write down the list Moron! Chokupandi Rosa akka What weird names! Are they even worth inviting? I feel like pelting them What is sir's name? - Omagundam - 'Fire pit', huh? Your phone is ringing! 'Your hobby is to take a dig at me!' - Hello - Hello, what? Why didn't you call me? - Matter of respect, aunt - Aunt, huh? I'll clobber you I am Magizhini Magizhini - Bro, Magizhini it seems - Then continue Yes, don't shout How many guests for the 'flower' ceremony? About 50 of us Why so many guests for this simple ritual? We will bring many flowers! No need Just call 20 people We can't organize a feast for so many - Okay - What, 'okay'? - Say 'Okay, di' affectionately - Okay, dear Don't talk in a husky voice anymore - Why? - I am getting goosebumps Okay Good night Even I am feeling odd You are already looking dazed Clear off! [devotional song] - 1 minute - What? I am getting engaged formally 2 days from now Don't follow me That's it [indistinct chatter] Why did this politician call me? Is the MLA in? He's in a resort in Koovathur! Bro, 'Attack' Balu is here Hello, Balu Please come 'Welcome seems too hearty!' - Good morning - Please sit Sit down, Balu Good morning Greetings, Balu 'Why are all these money lenders trooping in?' 'Do they plan to beat me to a pulp?' 'Bonus, huh?' - Why did you want to see me? - Where is the groom from? You've arranged everything without a word What is his profession? He is a wholesale business man He supplies vegetables to Andhra, Kerala and Karnataka According to the season he changes the items Expect me to believe this? Only what can't be sold here you'll trade outside Your daughter has a groom right here What are you saying? Our MLA's son Gemini Ganesan is in love with your daughter Love, huh? My daughter?! He insists he will marry only your daughter My daughter and this politician's son? He cancelled my catering for his daughter's wedding And brought in caterers from Chennai How will he accept me on equal terms? Which youngster listens to his parents these days? Think about my proposition Your groom-to-be is just a middle man But this lad here owns 100 acres He is a big shot He is just a mediator - What, man? - Leave all that 'Isn't this God's will?' He cancelled your catering order a few weeks ago But now he is at the mercy of your daughter for his 3 meals a day! Why are you serving tea? Serve juice Whatever it is, my son-in-law must be on his way for the engagement How can I stop him or the guests? So many weddings have been stalled in the last minute This is just an engagement 'We'll tackle him' 'He seems a good choice' Balu, drink this mango juice 25% of your loan has been paid by our bro here Imagine how he will pamper you after the wedding You wanted a sister for the ritual? - My girlfriend - I can see for myself What can you see? He is jealous of our combo Has everyone left? - Shall I ask uncle? - Call him He is not even worth calling Shut up! Otherwise he will create a ruckus Uncle, we left What about you? Akka, have you left? We saw 23 girls for him No one was the right catch 'Sivaraj from Chennai' 'You asked for a shop on lease That's finalized now' 'Come next week and pay up the advance' - Okay, anna - Hey bro We got the shop in Koyambedu - Really? - Magizhini is our lucky mascot - Thanks to my girlfriend - I'll clobber you Buffalo! I'm praising you Don't stamp my foot He has finally found a girl What twisted logic! What are you saying? Our guests are on the way here How can you change your mind now? Don't, dear It's our daughter's future This is a prestigious alliance Go inside - Don't keep chatting - Uncle is calling We will be there in half an hour Don't come, my wife's brother doesn't like your profession it seems Not only that He wants his son to marry my daughter So this function is cancelled What do you mean, uncle? We have already left How can you stop- - He is asking us not to come - Let me speak Anna, let's discuss it in person We are close by It won't work, madam I am cancelling this alliance If you still come I'll resort to violence Don't be angry Go inside Why are you doing this? Why did he change his mind? Call everyone and tell them not to come - Uncle, where are you? - Outside the bride's house Don't go inside I heard about it Can I go in and talk to them? Not necessary I don't mind falling at their feet and pleading We don't have to lose our self respect Please leave I think we have a puncture Amma, please stop 'Let's see how long she will keep bragging' 'Are you a mother or a mack?' 'Does it look good if you keep announcing you're bride hunting?' 'Who will fall for her son?' 'He is likely to get married only for the next 3 months' 'He crosses that, he won't marry for another 6 years' We said 'no' They came forward and agreed Call and give her a piece of your mind She is dead meat, man I thought you're beautiful It won't work for me 'I wanted to reject you' Only your father said 'yes' Now why are you giving us some lame excuse? 'Yes, I am only a fish vendor' I am a shameless fellow Are you an angel? 'Can't I find anyone else?' You will marry someone worse off than me Your parents will watch you suffer Sorry My mother and I pleaded and fought with my father They have brainwashed him 'I understand your situation' After seeing me ...you told the girls who rejected you ...that I'm an angel 'I heard you were so happy and you derided them' Tomorrow, you will land up here I am marrying a girl who is an angel You'll yell at me, right? I won't step inside a temple hereafter If I go, I will pray to God for you to get a better bride than me What can girls like me do? We can only cry without anyone's knowledge Or we can upload our feelings as status in WhatsApp Our freedom is limited She feels really bad about this Amma is running over there - Amma, please stop - Stop, amma 'Please stop, ma' - Amma, wait - Listen to me, ma 'Let's go back home' Ma, please Amma, wait Don't run Bro, give me the phone Wait and watch what I do to him - Tell me - Yov! Balu You cancelled my wedding all of a sudden 'I won't forgive you' My mother tried to end her life and is in a critical condition Just like how you humiliated us... ...I will do the same to you I will make you regret missing such a good groom I'll insult you in front of everyone I want to see you suffer Hey! Listen 'She and her damn apology!' - What is it? - Nothing, ma Here...drink this Royal pain, I swear! Watch your step, ma Slowly, you can make it My legs are killing me Open the door Careful Sit down gently Gently Lift her feet Ouch! Careful Ma, let's stop all this 'looking' at brides and matching horoscopes for a while If you don't get married within the next 2 months ...you have to wait for 6 long years I don't believe in astrology Instead of being rejected all the time I would rather wait for 6 years, ma As if my 'wife' is yet to be born! As far as I know this scheme is over I know she is already there Fine but where? Let's go to Chennai and focus on our wholesale business - Okay - That's all Stay with me for just 2 months Go to Chennai when I am on my feet again Okay, ma Take some rest We'll be back soon Don't keep your feet in the edge, shift a bit I'll get you fresh mutton soup We'll tell Sivaraj we'll come to Chennai 2 months from now Hey! Why is she sending me 'Good morning' messages? Going overboard enquiring about amma Don't get hyper It's a big deal getting a message from a girl! Reply adding 'very' in good measure! - What 'very'? - Very very good morning Be generous! How can we blame her for her father's misdeed? Let's go Let's eat here 'Take your hands off your armpit' God knows where he's fiddling! Banana leaf substituted by paper! She's asking if you ate? Hey! You're bang on Bro, when a girl is pining for you day and night ...means you are in her heart None of my business, but check her WhatsApp status and display picture Bro, check this out I told you so! Serve me some 'sambar' When an angel smiles at you, don't ignor- Hello...what are you up to? What does she think of herself? How does it affect her if I eat at the right time or not? She asked you...? You messaged and she replied, right? Yes, bro "What happened, my precious?" Hey! Why is Tamannaah upside down? Do I resemble Tamannaah? Buddy, I'm missing her terribly - Let's go see her - To be attacked by 'Attack' Balu? I'll be buried alive, no way Son roams like a street dog Mother is sleeping like a log! I love your mole Why did you come now? - Go - I came to see you My father may show up Bye I want to talk to you This evening we are 'seeing' the minister's daughter for you - No way - I'm talking to you I'll only marry 'Attack' Balu's daughter I'll clobber you! Still pining for her? Not now but always she is my sweetheart You spurned your love for money and power You married a minister's sister I can never be like you If you force me to marry the minister's daughter My mother is no more I'll denounce my bond with you And walk out of this house Hello Hey...! Will you come over to meet me now? You want me to get beaten up by your father? How about a 20-20? What is that? You come 20 km to meet me I'll come 20 km to meet you We'll meet half way in the usual lovers' haunt I'll be there Okay "My firebrand darling" "Your beauty zaps me; I'm floating" "Lost track of nights and days" "Floored, on the ground I lie in a daze" "Girl who fights with me" "In your laughter lovely I crumble to dust dizzily" "I'm a coin tossed on the wall, I fall flat" "I am your cheerleader, howzat!" "Benumbed seeing you my limbs don't move" "Though night creeps in I can't sleep even a wink" "You made me swirl in a whirl full 360 degrees circle" "You collided into me with mother's love unconditionally" "I don't get it, dear I'm in a haze, unclear" "Your eyes mesmerize me Lifting my spirits to infinity" "My fiery girl dazzling" "Your beauty bewitches me; I'm floating" "Lost track of date and days" "Floored and dumbfound I lie in a daze" You do all this for your mother, huh? Why don't you talk to your husband? Maybe he will consent now You try talking to that man But still I try Try my level best, okay? "If you stand before me unexpected I become a string of flowers scented" "Without a goodbye if you leave me like a cowrie shell in mancala I'll be" "Hey! My innocent princess I feel like a coconut crushed to pieces" "I'm crumpled in thoughts of you, dear for our love to merge sure and sincere" "Tempting teenage-girlie I no longer feel hungry" "Since our 1st hug I'm bitten by the love bug" "Think of you 24x7 wherever I'm not fibbing, I swear" "I'll die if you leave me I'm not kidding, sweetie" "I'm not joking, dear Not teary eyed either" "Till this moment, according to me There is no one like you, absolutely" "My firebrand darling" "Your beauty zaps me; I'm floating" "Lost track of nights and days" "Floored, on the ground I lie in a daze" "Hey! Girl who fights with me" "In your laughter lovely I crumble to dust dizzily" "I'm a coin tossed on the wall, I fall flat" "I am your cheerleader, howzat!" - You know Aravalli madam - Yes...so what? She asked our daughter's hand again I'll murder you And say you died of a heart attack! I anticipated this Only if he doesn't object it's a problem Let me 1st become financially strong and then fix our wedding Okay then "I was a stony terrain, arid and bare I turned into a pond thanks to your care" "Your lotus-red eyes alluring bring the best feast in me recurring" "Like slicing a palm fruit deftly in your eyes you've imprisoned me" "I stood tall, touching the skies yonder With just a whisper you made me surrender" "Your love turns me into a bunch of keys dangling on your waist to do as you please" "You made a bull out of me from a mere deer Why do you hoard me like a treasure, dear?" "You make up after a fight You flirt with delight" "You offer yourself to me Day and night selflessly" 'Chennai Koyambedu' "Your beauty zaps me; I'm floating" "Lost track of nights and days" "Floored, on the ground I lie in a daze" 'Kuzhandhai Wholesale Vegetable Shop' Why isn't he picking the call? Why aren't you picking amma's call? She's jobless! Talk to her Bro, don't pretend to work How are you, son? No complaints Top of the world! Don't beat around the bush Come to the point What is Magizhini saying? Same old story Her father dislikes me How does that matter? She likes you, right? Ask her if she's okay with a register marriage We have just 6 days left as per our astrologer's prediction We must get you married by then I'll try to convince her - Hang up now - Sneezing smell! If lovers want to get married... ...the parents won't accept or bless them Only if we get married they will come around! Pack your bags and come away So I will just walk out of my house I'll get the 'idli' You prepare the chutney We can run a mobile eatery and survive, okay? - We can add 'parotta' to our menu - By all means! First talk to my mother How can you throw such a bombshell? There are no auspicious dates in these 6 days Isn't the date fixed based on the auspicious time usually? Why don't we change it to an ordinary day? How can we break tradition? Once in a lifetime event We should be choosy 8th and 9th day after New moon are considered inauspicious But those days also have certain auspicious hours 'It's just our mindset, aunt' Somehow with your weird logic you've convinced me How many guests on your list? May be around 40-50 In that case from our side will it look good... ...if only Magizhini and I show up for the wedding? You have a point Then listen to me Should you invite everyone without uncle's knowledge? What are you suggesting? Wow...! I can't believe how wonderful a son-in-law we have got! Buddy, this Friday I'm getting married at the temple - You must come - Super news The wedding may or may not happen What nonsense is this? - I fell in love with a girl - I know - Her father is a holy terror - Then? In case he gets wind of the venue... ...and brings the police to stop it Don't get upset I've arranged the feast at a hotel, nearby If we get married bless us and eat Otherwise enjoy the feast! Inviting me for your wedding or a riot? My wedding is almost a brawl Our astrologer has predicted it I can handle it, come The alliance that clicked on both sides was cancelled at the engagement stage She loves that boy it seems Clobber you What audacity! Tell her I will butcher and bury her Brother, don't get tense She's ready for the last resort She's adamant she will marry only that boy Yesterday she tried committing suicide I stopped her in the nick of time And promised her I will find a solution I have arranged their wedding this Friday in a temple in Chennai As her uncle and aunt You are my brother So as her uncle you should... ...conduct the wedding for me Keep this news a secret Especially my husband should not know You should take that responsibility Shall I take leave? My dear, our daughter has to attend an interview in Chennai How long will she sit idle and jobless at home? Why don't you let her attend this interview? I realize she has a point Will she get a fat salary? It will be a lump sum Then this Thursday and Friday We can send her for this interview Listen, the company sets the interview date - How can you decide? - You are outdated Astrology is trending as a fashion now This company owner is into karma-astrology! As per her horoscope ...you should tell which day is good Thursday or Friday? You are an almanac maniac! I meant you can refer it 'Rohini' star Taurus sign Wednesday, Thursday, 8th and 9th day from New moon day Both the days are so-so Friday seems okay - Ask her to go on Friday - You think so? Okay This will be her 1st trip to Chennai to get a job How can she go alone? If you accompany her... ...you will be her lucky mascot Mandharai...come here I'll be back Are you mad? Why do you botch things up? Imagine if he comes with me! You don't know his psyche If I say 'yes' he will say 'no' Trust me Only I'll be coming with you to Chennai Oh no! Mandharai These interviews are a pain You accompany her I told you so?! All of you should be in 'action' mode Remain alert also And most importantly If you see any policeman The signal is 'B' Then all of you must hide...okay? Hey...come here Are you attending a Party meeting? Give it to me He looks like Sellur MLA How did he come here? [Kalakeya language in 'Baahubali'] Give me the sacred ash Long live Magizhmadhi! 'Baahubali' I and II! Mix this sacred ash in the lake Pay attention Don't stick together in 1 spot Spread and be alert Only then it will be easy to escape Go now Still they are in threes like cricket stumps! Priest, did you overhear our conversation? As long as you didn't, it's fine [Holy chant] Where is everyone? 'She isn't picking my call' 'What is she up to?' - Chant faster - Auspicious time is nearing Bride, groom, friends & co Oblivious and obvious, please come Coming Sit down, quick Priest, will you speed up? Stop your singing Bless the sacred thread Don't be a pain Finish your chant fast How many 'Swahas' will he recite? Good lord! This man is calling me nonstop Pick up, you lazy lump! - Give the sacred thread - Good time is yet to start Forget time and tide Do the needful - Whom should I give? - Give it to me Son-in-law, catch! 'I tie this sacred thread around your neck O maiden with auspicious attributes' Knot it 6 times instead of thrice for a very strong bond Thank God, we didn't face any problem So you think! This is just the beginning If my husband gets to know of this blood bath it will be He's calling me again I'll be back right now How long I've been trying to reach you Don't you know to answer? We just came out of the interview Is that so? How was the interview? Sooper! Lower your tone and chant! 'Both of you stand-' Everything went off well Only grievance you were not here Why don't you congratulate our daughter? Of course, let me wish her Dear, your father Go ahead, talk Appa...? My warmest wishes My dear, even if I am not with you now... '...my blessings are always with you' From now on, your future will be bright - Thank you, pa - 'Let me talk to your mother' Yes, dear? How's the company owner? He's a wonderful boy Why don't you wish him too? Why should I wish him? He is the one who has given our daughter a bright future Just express your gratitude Our daughter is in his care, right? Fine, I'll wish him 1 minute, hold Your father-in-law Talk to him Please, for my sacred thread's sake My dear boy - Good morning, sir - Thanks for giving my daughter this job 'You should only take good care of her' She's young and innocent Make allowances for any mistake on her part Her life is in your hands Don't worry about all that I'll take care of your daughter much better than you, sir Just watch how she will blossom in the future Hold on a minute Your voice sounds familiar to me Meet me in person My face will be familiar too! 'Let me talk to my wife' I'll ask aunty to talk Yes, dear? What is her salary? He's asking about her salary details Tell that madcap it's around Rs 25,000/- Rs 25,000 it seems Starting salary is Rs 25000? He wants to know if starting salary is 25000 Why is he such a pain? Tell him it is incremental 'Why is he such a pain?' 'Tell him it is incremental' - 'Whaaat?' - Nothing I meant the salary will increase gradually Then let her keep around 5000 for her basic expenses 'Ask her to deposit the balance 20,000 in my account' We've borrowed left, right and center, we can repay now Sure, uh...er...can I ask you something? Shall I stay with her for a while? I can help her settle down Ensure she's comfortable, right? Supervise everything and then come home I'll talk to you later My dear son-in-law On the 1st of every month you must deposit 20000 in his account it seems Whaaaat? Rs 20,000?! Head is spinning 'Attack' Balu has nailed us solid! I paid Rs 650 for this Lift your hand For my dear friend Kuzhandhai to make babies I'll lose my power Eat some almonds Aphrodisiac it seems Bro, what do you have in mind? You are so wrong She is really young What? I want to discuss our future whole of tonight I won't even switch off the light Bye, huh? Even I feel like eating this How helpful is that! Let me store its potency! Bride has gone inside Let me see what his move is I'm feeling shy and kind of weird Are you feeling shy? I'll switch off the light He switched off the light! He said he intended discussing their future Seeing her face he changed his mind Let me see how he faces me in the morning! Why did you switch on the light? - No need all this? - Which 'all'? Kissing Cuddling - Canoodling, huh? - All these - Why? - Hey Kuzhandhai Are we ready to have babies? Think about it My father is such a terror, he will force me to marry someone else Anything might happen Until my father knows about our wedding and consents... ...let's not indulge in all these hugs and kisses Is it so? They didn't do anything? Good lord! My darling child Why are you doing this? Give me a grandchild in 7 months, zip zap zoom! If we have a grandson... ...and he pees on your father's lap that man's temper will cool down How can I do all this in 7 months? I want you to conceive and you try to convince me! Your father was a premature baby The trauma of being married to your father ...you can erect a statue for me on Marina beach! Ma, appa can do anything at any time to ruin our lives That's why I firmly think this should happen first Please give me a grandchild, my dear child Agreed? - Let go of my hand - Come in fast In daytime, huh? Did we follow the tradition of auspicious dates? Usually it is 1st wedding night Let's change history today! It will be interesting - Get out - Why are you chucking me out? "My heart so disobedient beats erratic in excitement" "My heart loaded with passion looks for you in anticipation" "Just a fleeting glimpse of you I became light as a feather, it's true" "Head felt dizzy, I flew completely without a clue" "My heart so headstrong runs a marathon" "My heart brimming with emotion looks for you with expectation" "One brief glance at you I'm light as a feather, your beau" "Head felt giddy, my princess I flew completely clueless" Where are you going off in a huff? Don't they need their privacy? Now you're talking! "The whole town looks up to the sky above" "Your love for me is beyond that I know" "Hearing you speak words so sweet my heart fills up with joy complete" "In the sweep of your lashes intense canals turn into green fields dense" "Like the clouds drizzle prolific without anyone asking specific" "You come along too to live as a couple true" "To live and love without fear as my wifey dear" "Trust me, no one can hinder Come, let's make out together" Look here, boys Every month you must pay your interest promptly I am 'Attack' Balu's daughter now I've removed my sacred thread - First pay my father - Take Only after she started working look at the glow on her face Then what? Her boss takes good care, right? Accept it Apple phone it seems "If biting cold wind blows over you, dear" "I'll protect you like a flower sincere" "Your scent like a lingering lullaby makes my mother pamper you like a baby" "I was like the Aloe vera plant thorny You made me a mirror smooth and shiny" "You love like a swing tranquilizing will comfort me always revitalizing" "Won't sleep take a nap too along with us to refresh anew" "Me and you, you and me We will play till eternity" "Happiness stays always with us Shower me with your caress" "My heart so disobedient" "Beats a tattoo in excitement" "My heart loaded with passion looks for you in anticipation" "Just a fleeting glimpse of you I became light as a feather, it's true" "Head felt dizzy, I flew completely without a clue" How many months since you were married? - 3 months - 3rd month in 3 months, huh?! Why is he calling me now? Good news for you Even I must share a piece of good news First let me tell you MLA has consented for the wedding Whaaaat? He has agreed, huh? - Aunt, what happened? - My head is spinning Hello, are you there? I am here Even I must tell you this good news Our daughter has been promoted Her boss is right here Please wish him I should thank him, not wish him That's what I meant Please tell him Just a few words Talk to my husband You kept your word and promoted my daughter so soon Just wait and watch I'll take your daughter to a totally different level! Even now your voice sounds so familiar Come in person I'll look familiar too Okay, son Let me talk to my wife Hello, dear? He says he'll take her to another level Will he hike up her salary? Er...I don't...1 minute He is asking if she will get a salary hike? Even this 20,000 is tough Only rise in position, that's all - Salary won't be hiked - Your father is jobless! - Obsessed with money - This is a prestige post Like a minister's post you mean - Exactly - I will come soon 'One Month Later' God, till my baby is born, my father should not find out I'm married 'I grow old making dosa' Please protect me Twenty two - Come here - What? Ever since she came I've been noticing Hasn't our daughter become plump? She hasn't put on weight Just expecting Expecting pizza, burger that she eats in Chennai here, butter-fingers! What? She licks butter off her finger and so she's glowing Ask her to be on her guard Her boss might promise her a bonus and give her a baby instead! That's bound to happen He is himself a baby! For past few weeks you're sounding like a parrot He is suspicious now [dialogs from 'Vaaranam Aayiram] 'I must tell you this' 'You are so beautiful' I am asking you to marry me 'Go wherever you wish' 'Go to Paris or wherever' 'But marry me and then go' 'I want to clobber the man who invented Dub Smash' What has upset you? This fellow bugs me with his photos and dubsmash Give me your mobile I'll handle this gurkha! 'I don't love you' 'I don't like you' 'I don't think you are beautiful' 'But I'm scared all this will happen' 'Think and tell me' 'Sambar' Gemini! Bro, act like Kamal Haasan to this Gemini Ganesan Apple phone? 'How do I operate this?' Who is it? - Hello - 'Who is speaking?' This is 'Attack' Balu here 'Attack' Balu? Basket ball, huh? - Give the phone to my daughter - Who is she? Magizhini There is no one by that name here Hang up, I say! Hey! Listen I called our daughter Some random man is talking 'Aunt, this is the right time' Atleast now tell him the truth Wrong timing Did you think he is a holy terror because his name is 'Attack' Balu? Nothing of that sort He has suffered 2 heart attacks already Just once more and the doctor said, 'We have to send him up' I'll give you an idea If you break the news point blank, he'll be shell-shocked Either he will have another attack Or I will end up in prison 3rd option he'll take a stone and crack your skull into 2! Then it will be a 'gone case' So what you do is go straight to uncle Simply say 'Maybe Magizhini is in love with someone' Our daughter hasn't come home for the past few weeks May be she is in love with her boss? Look here, if something like that happens I'll make them stand before me and split them into two Dust to dust, ashes to ashes I will bury them Don't get tense, dear Our daughter is not so gutsy My crooked brain came up with this doubt Lean back and chillax! 'Lips are like roses?' This village Romeo tortures me no end Why are you obsessed with your phone? Hey! You started the ball rolling Looks like very soon I'll fall in love with him He impressed me too much! 'My sweetheart' Read this message I love you today Hey! Chee What are you doing? Shall I tell you something else? I can see only his face even when I sleep on my tummy What a turnip-face! All this won't work out What does your daughter think of herself? I've called her past 15 days I think you were bang on about her boss 'banging' her Let's go, only you know her address She has too much work in her office it seems Only now she told me Why will our daughter deceive us? I didn't imply she will deceive us I don't want to get deceived! I'll book our tickets Be ready I feel really tired Let's go next week - Where did you go? - Get ready Gone case, huh? I knew the station master So I got the ticket on loan! 'That loan shark is here' 'He will badger me for his dues' Hey Balu! Come here Where are you off to? To Chennai to see my daughter - I'll be back soon - Wait, man 2 years you were paying interest Past 2 months not even that This won't work Settle your account Let my daughter marry our MLA's son After that I'll repay my loan and more Hey Balu Your daughter has married someone in Chennai already Don't you know? Whole town is aware Don't you dare malign my daughter You don't want this wedding to happen You'll lose face Don't paint her out to be virtuous Your daughter has loose morals You're spitting fire at me! If you dare deride my daughter I'll slaughter you - Yes, aunt - Son-in-law On the way back from booking our tickets... ...he picked up a fight with that loan shark 'Chopped his hand in a fit of rage' His brother-in-law is a high level police officer My husband is now in jail and we can't even take him out on bail 'What do we do now?' Listen to my idea, aunt My husband chopped a man's hand So he is in jail for 15 days on a non-bailable offence My son-in-law asked me to ask you for a favor If you grease the required palms I'll bring him out tomorrow We will give any lump sum you want But instead of a fortnight My son-in-law wants to know if he can be kept inside for 4 months, sir Tell me, aunt The lawyer says 4 months isn't possible Then? 'He says the only provision is for 6 months!' Superb! Magizhini will deliver the baby We will manage somehow Soooper! Okay, I'll do as you say "Dreams unfulfilled in life's journey" "Patterns of multi hued 'rangoli' blown away by the wind heedlessly" Don't worry, uncle I'll bring you out in 2 days, mark my words 'Fat hopes! We ensured you're in for 6 months' [song from 'Neengal Kaetavai'] "Boats heading to the shore unbidden considering even oars to be a burden" 'My dear, even if I am not with you now...' '...my blessings are always with you' Coming, dear I would've been happier if you had chopped off that jerk's neck! 'How dare he malign our Magizhini!' I am stuck here for the past 2 months Magizh doesn't want to visit me even now? How can her work be so important? She has got a promotion Her work load must be heavy What about her salary? It will be credited in your account on the dot 'Time's up Please leave' - Do you need to be told specially? - See you, dear He doesn't behave like a politician's son Sends childish messages He isn't even letting me sleep in peace He is really desperate Let me reply Can we both go on a honeymoon? Thanks to this phone I only see 'terrace' moon! That's it, switch off He is killing me, I swear Don't plague me with questions One of you tell me Your husband has done something wrong Hey! You there! I thought you'll be out only after 20 days How did you come out so soo- Are you asking how I came out early or why I came? Just a general knowledge question They released me earlier as an ode to Annadurai My daughter never visited me even once when I was in prison Even that is okay He made my daughter work damn hard And he hasn't even paid her for 2 months I feel there's something fishy here Let's go to Chennai right away Why go right now to Chennai? Why get so worked up? Did I call you to Pakistan? Get ready, I'll borrow some cash and come What will I do now? Son-in-law She will deliver in another 15 days We know that already, doctor Will it be normal or Caesarean? How can you even ask me this? Obviously Caesarean Then why can't you deliver the baby now? Why are you in such a tearing hurry? Today is Tuesday It isn't an auspicious day That's okay, doctor You can fix the surgery for 12:01 a.m, Wednesday 'Hurry' must be your middle name! 'Attack' Balu will attack me, doctor Please save me, doctor I'm ready to pay any amount Its okay Risk is yours Admit her right away Thanks doctor 'Chennai Koyambedu' Finally in 1 piece Get down Don't hassle me Change your saree and come out fast Only if you push a bit it will start Hello, son-in-law We had breakfast and coming to your place I just admitted Magizhini in the hospital Surgery is only tonight So take uncle on a tour around Chennai Let's meet tomorrow Is that the plan? Okay, done Watch how I take him for a soooper ride! He's here I'll hang up Made me push the moment I land here Is it a bullock cart or mobile cart? Which area? It's either Anna arch or Kalaignar arch Akka, 1st one is Arignar Anna arch I'll take you straight there Will you know when we reach there? I know, I'll show Insides are shaking! - This is the area, let's get off - No, not this one I think...it's Kalaignar Nagar! - You mean K.K.Nagar? - That's the place Good catch! I'll take them for a solid ride and line my pocket Why has our daughter switched off her phone? She must be at work Don't bother her My chest is paining 'Aiyo! 'Attack' Balu will convert this auto into an ambulance!' - 'Akka, what's your name?' - Just shut up! Drive slowly 'Can't go on' This time I'll find the right address This area doesn't seem familiar at all Bro, go back to the spot we got in The point is- Don't point here You took me for a ride, huh? I'll rip your insides out Take me to a decent hotel - How much? - 5050 - Whaaat? - Rs 50 discount for you - Give only Rs 5000 - I have only 5000 on me See you, bro? - Give me at least 1000 back - Come along I didn't walk away just to fight with you I thought you both needed some privacy Shouldn't both the families get united or not? That's the only reason Don't get me wrong My darling daughter-in-law! Good luck Godspeed Go slowly Don't rush Slow down I can hear a baby crying Baby and mother are safe Who is this darling? Look at me Look at your father Why is my son-in-law calling me at this time of night? Aunt, you're now a grandma Please talk a bit louder I can't hear a word You're a grandma now Special status Are you asking for uncle? Hey! Hag of a grandma! - My ear is blocked - You have a grandchild I'll return your money with interest, get lost! He's a royal pain! Am I a grandma now? I'm soooo happy Then we'll both come home tomorrow morning? No, aunt, she'll be discharged only tomorrow evening Bring him the day after Until then show him the rest of Chennai Okay then - Sister! - Bro, good morning - Are you back? - Please come Sir, please push my auto Hey, get down You'll listen to this chap and not me, huh? Then how do we find the address? Look, I arranged a car - Get into the car - Akka...akka Roam around the city with your wife! How did he get here? Don't go, akka Aren't you familiar with all the places in Madras? Why are you worried now? The 2 men seated behind are my left and right hand They know all the routes Like Google Map Aunt, there are too many alleys in the city Very tough to find any address Why don't we directly go to Magizh's office? Give me the address This is why we need our son-in-law with us! Lord Rama! Save me Both the ex-chief ministers saved me yesterday Who will save me today? I thi...think it is- Office is some Denmark or Dominoes Where do we go, boys? Boss, I'll give the right directions Driver, turn left Driver, take this right Are you mad? We must go left Bro, turn left Anna, take this right How dare you rough me up? Left...take this left Take a sharp right What is this nonstop left and right? Stop the car Get down 'I'll run for my life' This is a left and right for you! Go straight and dash your head at that dead end! Bro, please stop Where are these IT companies? In OMR and ECR roads Heroes SSR and MGR, huh? OMR and ECR Go straight and take the left ...then right Left and right Again another left What's wrong with him? You carry on We'll take care Oh my goodness! Is my daughter working in such a tall building? - Let's go inside - Hello, who are you? All because of you I'll tell my dad I'm really bugged Go back to the hotel If you don't show me the place I'll push you under a speeding bus - I'll go back home alone - Wait...driver Can you see that tall building on the right side? Stop the car right in front I think that's the one Son-in-law, is that the one? Why are you standing here? 'God, please save only me!' Please come This is her house Come inside Magizhini...? Didn't you tell me she's staying with some girls? I see only men's clothes here - Uncle - Don't interrupt! Nowadays girls wear men's clothes - Why be suspicious? - Underwear also? - Uncle - Shut up! If you keep asking me questions like bullets off a gun ...how can I answer? Give me some time to think Why is a baby hammock here? With a baby in it! That is...how do I tackle this question? There's an aunty next door Could it be her baby? Let me take a look at the baby This baby is such a sweety-pie I feel like becoming a grandma too You look at the baby too 'Oh God! Help me' - This baby resembles our daughter - Let me see You are so right Carbon copy of our daughter I have this sudden doubt Maybe our daughter has married her boss Could this be their baby? Hey! Magizh Don't get in my way 'Magizhini, come out fast, dear' Father We did this without your knowledge, forgive us I am so sorry Please forgive me too I was the one who conducted her wedding Who is our son-in-law? That...that is someone you- Who is our son-in-law? Is it her boss? Say yes...say yes Yes, pa Boss...boss? Hurry- Why is he here? Hello, 'Attack' uncle Good lord! Is he our son-in-law? - Yuck! - Why can't I be your son-in-law? You raised a parrot and gave it to a bear How dare you! I'll have you pounded to a pulp Come out fast He's calling me a bear Come out fast, I say I've seen you somewhere I came home to ask for your daughter's hand What are you doing here? I'm the husband of your daughter! - I'm also with them - Yes, dear Didn't he swear he will humiliate me in front of all our friends and family? Please note down this address Aunt, take money from his pocket for hospital expenses 'He's tight fisted even during an attack!' So you didn't get any attack? If our friends and family find out about this wedding... ...imagine the disgrace I'll face Except you everyone is aware - For that loan shark - He knows from A to Z - Was he speaking the truth? - Yes We have been tricked royally - You marry some other girl - Don't go, pa Are you angry? By the way, I wanted to ask you something Who cooked for her wedding? We arranged it in a good hotel I was planning to cook 16 different dishes I couldn't cook for my own daughter's wedding! - Uncle, Magizh? - Grasshopper! Where did you buy this mobile? Yov! How did you get this? It's been with me from day 1 Hangs often If you text me I'll chop your hand 'No girl No mobile' I wanted to conduct the 'talk of the town' wedding You've humiliated me in front of all my kith and kin, Mandharai Function, huh? 'Wonder who is the caterer here' Why are you here? Your wife said you wanted us to come for a catering order Me...? What function? Look over there You'll know then Naming ceremony of Jr Kuzhandhai presided by 'Attack' Balu Please come, bro Move...give way VIP baby is coming, right? You sleep here, my darling Hey, what's happening here? How many more bombshells will you throw? 3 days since the baby was born - Let's name the baby, hurry up - Fine, 'Hari'! Give way...move aside Who is this blocking the way? Go back You invited everyone and made me look a fool - Lunch is ready - Stuff it down your throat! Name the baby after my father Muthukaruppa Ponnambalam Not possible Why not? You didn't agree to my choice of groom Don't I have the right to name the baby? Rights, procession, palanquin, turban, all intact Can we conduct a 'Jallikattu' with a Jersey cow?! Our grandchild is a girl! - Granddaughter? - Then what? Okay...fine Name our granddaughter... ...after my mother Muthaayi Muthaayi...? - 'Mutaai', you mean candy? - Muthaayi as in pearl!! Shall we name her Muthaayi? Don't agree - Tell your father - How can I? He is coming up with names like popcorn and biscuit Sounds terrible...Muttayi! - I told you not to call him - Sounds like a bakery item - You like the name or not? - Not 1 bit What's the big conference in aid of? Name her Muthaayi - Okay - No need! Muthaayi Muthaayi Muthaayi alias Divya! - Why Divya? - Sri Divya! Muthaayi sounds old fashioned Muthaayi at home Divya in school Don't I have a right even in this? You are the sole cause! Divya...? Muthaayi...! Muthaayi My precious grand-princess! Come son-in...bro, please come Gift for the baby? Take it Let's go eat Don't want our guests eating a cold lunch! 'Real life, Kuzhandhai & Magizhini Ramu & Vijaya' TamilRockers |
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