1
UPSTATE NEW YORK
Said the night wind
to the little lamb
Do you see what I see?
DON'T COUNT ON I Thad, I said no toys
at Grandfather's.
But it's Christmas.
Stop it!
- Hey! Dad!
- Hey!
Thad, you can't go crying
to other people all the time.
A man needs to know when
to stand up for himself.
Dear Magic-isn't-real Ball,
will Thad ever be a man?
Ouch.
Outlook not so good.
You broke it.
Dad?
Sid?
Someone help me!
Help!
Hello?
Thaddeus Sivana.
Who are you?
How do you know my name?
I am the last of the
consul of wizards.
Sworn to protect realms
from the Seven Deadly Sins.
For years have passed
and I have grown weak.
That is why I seek a
champion to inherit my magic.
You want me
to do magic?
With this,
all of my powers
will become yours.
But first,
you must demonstrate that
you're pure of heart
and strong in spirit.
He lies.
Don't be his champion.
We can give you power.
Search the eye.
Your father thinks you're weak.
Show him your power.
No!
What happened?
Only the purest of hearts
can resist their temptations.
But you,
you will never be worthy.
Do you know what I know?
Wait.
I've telling you, I swear!
Put me back in!
- Put me back in!
- Thad!
Calm down.
Hey! I'm gonna kill you,
you little punk!
Thad...
I... I was just there.
This man... this wizard...
He took me to a castle and...
Stop. Stop. Stop it!
You miserable, whiny, little shit!
You coulda killed us!
Do you understand that?
Said the king to the
people everywhere
Listen to what I say!
He will bring us
Goodness and light!
Dad?
Dad!
Dad?
You're okay.
You're gonna be okay.
You did this.
You did this!
No. Dad...
FIND US
Your magic grows weak.
Soon you won't be
able to contain us.
Seeking spells!
Find me one soul
who's worthy!
No matter how long it takes.
PHILADELPHIA
PRESENT DAY
Oh, it's the real thing
Oh, it's the real thing
Hey!
Yeah!
All my life, I've said
I've said it
I'm gonna be one of the greats
Oh, it's the real thing
Holy moley!
The boys in blue!
I'm sure glad to see you.
I called as soon as I saw.
They're in there.
You stay here.
Police!
I saw 'em hide back in there.
- Police, comin' in!
- Police!
- There's nobody here. It's a closet.
- What do you mean?
You really bought that, huh?
Oh, it's the real thing
Hey, no, no, no!
Stop, stop, stop, stop!
Open this up right now, kid!
That's a federal offense, kid!
You can't do that!
Don't go in that car.
Come on, open the door, please.
Please, please, come on!
Open this door, right now!
Come on!
Very good, very funny.
Very funny. That's great.
That's hilarious, yeah.
Uh, dispatch, we need backup
at the Lower One
shopping center, please.
Dispatch, cancel that request.
Some kid stole our walkie-talkies.
"Walkie-talkies"?
How old are you?
No, no, no, no.
That's my lunch, kid!
Miss Batson, I, uh...
I-I've been looking for you.
Ugh... No. Gosh.
It's me, it's Billy.
Ugh... okay.
I want the tiger.
I know, honey, I know.
But Mom's not exactly
going pro here.
We got one!
But I wanted a tiger!
Oh, but this is the real prize, baby.
See?
You can use that
your whole life.
You'll always find your way.
I can't find my way.
Mom?
Mom!
Mom!
Hey.
Who are you with, bud?
Yeah, he says it's Billy Batson.
Don't worry, kid.
I'm sure she'll come looking
before too long, okay?
They always do.
Mom, I'm home.
Yes?
Yeah, uh...
Is this Rachel Batson?
Who's asking?
Um...
Yeah, see, the thing is...
I think you're my mom.
You sure about that?
Sorry to bother you.
You just had to take
my lunch, huh?
You save me any fries?
Foster home in Pittsburgh
reported you missing
two weeks ago.
You sending me back?
No.
They don't want you.
Harsh.
You laugh,
but you've run from foster homes
in six counties, Mr. Batson.
From good people...
who want you,
all in pursuit of someone
who arguably does not.
It's time someone
looked you in the eye
and told it to you straight.
I don't need parents to
play make-believe with.
I got a mom.
Yes.
You're some detective.
73 Batsons,
between the ages of 28-40,
and you've crossed out every one.
She's still out there.
I know it.
There's a couple outside,
Mr. Batson.
They run a group home.
I can take care of myself.
When you're 18.
Until then,
I won't have you
living on the streets
looking for someone
who never looked for you.
Give these people a chance.
'Cause that's what
they're giving you.
You're out of options.
All right, let's get the spiel.
Just stay with me and Rosa,
we get it.
We were foster kids
back in the day.
Ooh, back in the dark ages.
Girl!
I'm young at heart.
Got my finger on the pulse.
Yeah, that's a reference to his
blood pressure because he's old.
Billy, do you have
any food allergies?
Oh, wish you did.
Darla's cookin'.
- Oy, guerito!
- What?
We know how overwhelming
it can all be.
New house, new faces.
All up in your face.
Just...
take it at your own speed.
Hello?
We're home!
That's what happens
when you suck!
So much for the welcome party.
Yeah, that thing growing out
of the couch would be Eugene.
Is that him?
Oh, my gosh! Billy!
Whoa, slow down, slow down!
Welcome home!
- And that's Darla.
- I'm Darla.
Big hugger.
I noticed.
Die! Die! Die!
He doesn't mean that.
It's the game.
Hey.
No sodas after dark, remember?
Whoa. When did it get dark?
Oh, the poster. I made you one.
Come look!
Oh, no!
Sorry, Pedro must've been
working out.
He was supposed
to be at school.
Oh.
Here.
Yes.
Exactly why your Math Department
is so uniquely suited for me.
I can't, I can't even...
with Eugene right now.
Sorry. Mary. Hi.
College interview.
- I'm Billy.
- What am I most excited about?
Oh.
What a great question.
I was hoping you'd ask.
Mention you're a foster kid.
Colleges eat that up.
What I'm most excited about
is the campus experience.
As a foster child,
I'm a big believer
in finding family and
friends in the most
unlikely of places.
Oh, I'm gonna miss
that girl so much!
It's Caltech,
it's a very prestigious school.
And also all the way
in California.
But we don't have to talk
about that right now.
It's a tough subject for me.
Do you like vegan food?
- Mm-mm.
- 'Cause, see, I love animals.
Oh, no! The tofurkey!
Oh, no, we may have
to eat a real turkey!
- Is that?
- It's okay. Come, I'll show you your room.
It's a bit of a madhouse,
I know, but,
it's fun!
Watch the bumps there.
Pedro, mi amor, hola.
Say hi to Billy.
Don't take it personally.
He's like that with everyone.
Freddy.
This is Billy Batson.
Make sure you make him
feel at home, okay?
Maybe don't say anything
too weird?
Oh, one weird thing is
you know the Romans used to
brush their teeth with their urine?
Apparently, it-it works.
Yup, um...
Oh, it's, uh...
it's a long way down.
Trust me, I speak from experience.
Victor pushed me.
They seem nice,
but don't buy it.
It gets real Game of Thrones
around here.
What?
Dude, I'm... just messin' around.
It's um, it's terminal cancer, I...
I have three months.
Kidding, again!
You look at me and you're, like,
"Why so dark?"
"You're a disabled foster kid,
you've got it all." Right?
Oh, yeah, that's the, uh,
the old batarang.
I mean, it's a replica, but...
Feel how sharp.
Could kill you in your sleep
with that thing.
You ever a Supes guy?
Yeah, me too.
Behold, the holy grail.
One nine millimeter round
shot at Superman himself.
It's legit.
Probably worth, I dunno,
$5-600, maybe more.
What's in the bag?
Hey.
Hey, it's all good.
It's good to maintain boundaries.
You don't gotta
talk so much, you know.
I mean, this place is great.
You're gonna love it.
Dinner!
All hands on deck!
Sweet.
Thank you for this family.
Thank you for this day.
Thank you for this food.
Even if it's not steak fillet.
Big school. 2,000 students,
you might think,
"Wow, so many strangers."
But not if you think of them as
possible for each friend then,
"Oh, so many friends."
The principal, her name's
Shirley. She's the best.
Next.
This is our security scanner.
Like in an airport.
It's totally safe.
I know what it is.
Does she always do this?
Silence makes me uncomfortable.
She's almost never uncomfortable.
Have a good first day,
big brother.
Look, you don't have
to hug me all the time.
We're not actually
brother and sister, so.
I'm sorry.
- Hey.
- Hey.
I-I didn't mean to make her...
I was overwhelmed, honestly.
He said I must be pure of heart.
He called himself a wizard.
Just like a...
a wizard from Harry Potter, some...
But y-you're saying that other
people have experienced this?
In a sense, yes.
Do you remember
what he said to you?
He tested me.
There were these statues.
Their eyes, it's like
they were looking at me,
making me think things.
Like, horrible things.
And do these approximate
what you saw?
Yes. That's exactly
how I remember it.
I-I don't understand.
How do you know...?
Recurring imagery has
proven very common
in cases of mass hysteria.
"Mass hysteria"?
I know.
The term's a bit theatrical.
But take UFO sightings,
for example.
Lights in the sky,
flying saucers.
Isolated incidents of people
who do not know each other...
Symbols.
Ask her about the symbols.
Sorry, Ms. Kwan.
But as an example of
recurring imagery,
maybe you recall seeing
these symbols before
the alleged abduction?
Don't remember any symbols, no.
I think I caught it on video.
There was something, um...
I remember the numbers on
my alarm clock, they kept
shifting.
Video?
Show me the video.
Uh, Ms. Kwan,
this is Dr. Sivana.
Um, one moment,
I can send it.
Hello?
Oh, my God!
Who's there?
Hello?
What's going on?
What's happening?
I'm-I'm going
to call the police.
Then this blinding light
all around me.
And I felt like I was
getting pulled down...
Like a temple
carved inside a mountain...
Exactly what you'd expect from
a guy who call himself a wizard.
...brought there
to save the world.
Dr. Sivana!
I appreciate your enthusiasm.
But you're funding my project.
And when I'm interviewing,
I don't wanna be interrupted.
56 reported abductions.
- I never saw it.
- Saw what?
Doctor, what is all this?
All these years...
I was convinced
I had the incorrect sequence.
Or perhaps...
the wrong symbols
to open the door.
But on that woman's alarm clock,
the seven symbols.
The sequence
repeating itself
seven times.
That's the difference.
Is this some sort of joke?
It may seem that way to you.
Because we're not, in actuality,
studying mass hysteria.
What all these people have seen,
every single one of them,
is absolutely real.
An alarm clock malfunctions,
and your first thought is
it's proof of a wizard?
Come on, Dr. Sivana.
You can't believe
any of this is real.
Why, yes.
Yes, I do.
I've been waiting
for this moment
for so long.
And now, here we are.
You don't remember me, do you?
I remember you.
You were a boy.
Now, you dare intrude
in my kingdom.
Do you know what it's like
for a child to be told,
"You'll never be good enough"?
No, you don't.
What you said to me
all those years ago
made me realize
who I really was.
And you know something?
I am not pure of heart.
The wizard is too weak
to stop us.
No.
No!
You never found your champion.
But we found ours.
You are the true champion.
They're using you.
You're nothing to them
but a means of escape.
Through you, they'll spread the
poison to everything they touch!
Make mankind turn into them.
You seek a pure soul, old man.
But no one's worthy.
Flight or invisibility?
If you could have
one superpower,
flight or invisibility,
what would you pick?
Everybody chooses flight.
You know why?
So they can fly away
from this conversation?
No, 'cause heroes fly.
Who doesn't want people to
think they're a hero, right?
But-But invisibility, no way,
I mean, that's perfect.
Spying around on people who
don't even know you're there.
Sneaking around everywhere.
It's a total villain power, right?
Then they did this study,
and this is a real thing.
They asked people
the same question,
You know, what power
do you want? But this time,
they made it so the
answers were anonymous.
And-And most people, since
they knew that it was secret,
said invisibility.
And I think that's
'cause most people
don't feel like heroes
on the inside, deep down.
You're gonna run away.
I mean, you stole my
Superman bullet.
Dude, I get it, I get it.
You've been screwed over
way too many times.
You don't trust anyone.
But that's the thing
about invisibility.
You handle it by yourself.
I didn't steal your dumb bullet.
Hey, how was it today?
That good, huh?
Whoa!
Oh, my God! Freddy!
You okay?
What the hell?
What is wrong with you two?
- No way that's gonna buff out.
- You gonna pay for that thing?
For the dent you made
almost hitting me?
Yeah, sure, um,
do you guys take these?
Brett, stop!
Don't touch my brother!
What, you need your fake
family to stand up for you?
- Stand up for yourself, man.
- Yeah, huh?
Here, stand up.
Stand up for yourself.
What are you gonna do?
Go home, cry to mommy?
Oh, yeah, you don't
have a mommy.
Stop hurting him!
Hey!
Man, sorry about that.
That wasn't fair, but,
then again,
you don't play fair, so.
Back off, assbags, I know
how to use these things!
Oh!
Hey!
Freddy, you okay?
Nowhere to run!
- Go, go, go!
- Grab him!
Get out of the way!
Whoa!
No, no, no, no!
You're dead, kid!
Yeah, you think you're funny?
I know where you
go to school, right!
Next stop, 30th Street Station.
Change for the Regional Rail Line.
Hello?
What's going on?
Help!
Holy moley.
Hello?
What the hell?
Who-Who's doing this?!
Hi, um...
I was supposed
to get off at 30th.
Billy Batson.
How'd you know my name?
I am the last of the
consul of wizards.
Keeper of the Rock of Eternity.
Oh.
You're
that guy.
Listen, I don't have any money.
Do not patronize me, boy!
You are standing
in the source of all magic.
The Rock of Eternity.
Seven foes, seven wizards.
But long ago,
we chose a champion.
And we chose recklessly.
He used his power for revenge.
Releasing the Seven Deadly
Sins into the world.
Millions of lives were lost.
Entire civilizations
erased from existence.
That is why I vowed
never to pass on my magic
until I find one
truly good person.
Strong in spirit.
Pure in heart.
Look, man, maybe this is magic.
I-I don't know, but,
the people you're looking for,
good, pure people...
I'm not one of them.
I-I don't know if anyone is, really.
You, Billy Batson, are all I have.
All the world has.
Lay your hands on this staff.
Gross.
And say my name so my
powers may flow through you.
I open my heart to
you, Billy Batson.
And in so doing,
choose you as champion.
Thanks. Don't scream
at me, mister, but
I really gotta get going.
My brothers and sisters
were slain by the sins.
Their thrones lie empty!
My magic must be passed on.
Now...
Speak my name!
I-I don't know your name, sir.
We just met.
My name is...
Shazam.
Wait, for real?
- Say it!
- Okay.
Jeez.
Should I say it?
Like,
Shazam?
Yes!
Carry my name
and with it, you
carry all of my powers.
The wisdom of Solomon!
The strength of Hercules!
The stamina of Atlas!
The power of Zeus!
The courage of Achilles!
And speed of Mercury!
What happened to me?
Why am I...?
W-W-What did you do to me?
What did you do to my voice?
You have been transformed to
your full potential, Billy Batson.
With your heart,
unlock your greatest power.
The thrones of our brothers
and sisters await!
Huh! Oh!
Get me outta here!
Dope!
My brother,
I applaud your choices today.
Gold shoes, gold belt,
white cape!
It shouldn't work,
but, hot damn, it does!
Yes, officer, I'm aware
he's run away in the past, I...
23 times?
Guy's got no social
media presence.
At all.
The guy's a ghost.
You know guys,
I'm happy to look for Billy.
More than happy.
Then you gotta wash the dishes,
that's what's more important.
What are you gonna do, Freddy?
Run after him? Ha-ha-ha!
Very funny!
No, wait, don't scream.
Uh, Victor! Victor! Victor!
It's me! It's Billy!
It's Billy!
You asked me,
"Flight or invisibility?"
I thought that was stupid,
but now I look like this
and I need your help!
Meet me back here
after lights out?
What's up, bud? You all right?
Yeah. Yeah.
I'm just...
I'm really... sad.
Because Billy's gone.
And you know,
maybe it's my fault.
Maybe I did it.
Uh, you know, maybe I-I snore.
Hey, hey, hey.
Not your fault, son, all right?
We'll find him, 'kay?
You don't snore that bad.
But you kinda smell.
Oh, oh, oh, my God!
Hey, stop right there.
How do I know you're not a
supervillain using telepathic abilities
to make me believe
that you're Billy, huh?
All I have to do is
press dial on this thing.
No, no, I have proof,
I have proof, here.
Look, I lied, okay?
I took your bullet.
- Oop! No, no, no! No!
- No! No!
Stupid adult hands!
But you saw it.
You saw it, right?
Look, Freddy,
I swear it's me, okay?
Look, I know we're not really
close friends or anything,
but you're the only
person that I know
that knows anything about
this Caped Crusader stuff.
- That's Batman.
- What?
Forget it.
Can I...?
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Oh!
Oh, my God!
It's crazy, right?
What are your superpowers?
Superpowers? Dude, I don't even
know how to pee in this thing!
Okay, c-can you fly?
Okay, let's do this.
How do we do this?
Just, um, just like Superman it.
Pkkwwff.
Pkkwf.
Obviously, you have to jump.
Come on.
How is that even obvious?
Okay.
Try, uh, t-to believe
that you can fly.
Okay, I read this deep dive in the
pyramid studies of superpowers
and in 6 out of 10,
belief is the key.
Belief, belief, belief.
Okay, okay.
I believe I can fly.
I believe I...
I believe I can fly.
I...
Did you believe?
Yeah.
You wanna try invisibility?
How do I do...?
You... Forget it. You know.
Okay, okay, okay.
Oh, my God! It worked!
Where'd you go?
I'm right here.
You can't see me?
Where?
I'm invisible!
I'm right here.
I'm over here.
I'm invisible!
I'm invisible!
Hey! Nice outfit, dipshit!
I-I might have
been testing invisibility and super
intelligence at the same time.
Freeman, I'm gonna come
over there and beat you.
Oh, my God!
The lightning, it was staring us
right in the face the whole time!
Literally!
Okay, okay.
Billy, we gotta give you a
lightning-themed superhero name.
Yeah.
Oh, right.
Hey, you, back...
off.
Hyperspeed, check!
I... I'm sorry-I'm so sorry.
I thought you were the
one who was screaming.
I doused him with pepper spray.
Smart move.
Yeah, hey, get up,
mister mugger guy!
Give the old lady
her purse back.
Um, I'm your age.
And he didn't get a chance to take
it 'cause I didn't let him take it.
Good, yeah, good.
You're really on top of this stuff.
And that should teach
you that old ladies,
regular-aged ladies
like yourself
don't need your protecting.
Right? So get off, bro.
I'm sorry, who are you?
His name is Thundercrack!
Hero to the people.
With the power and speed
of lightning all in one.
Dude, that sounds
like a butt thing.
- Mr. Philadelphia!
- That's a cream cheese thing, dude!
Powerboy,
'cause he's got all the powers.
'Cause sometimes pepper spray
can't protect against evil.
Powerboy, do you know this child?
Like, like a teeny little bit.
I don't really know...
Yeah, he's, like, my manager.
He's like a miniature manager.
- I'm his manager.
- And uh, you know.
Powerboy's not gonna work either,
okay? So work on something else...
Hey, hey, hey...
Electricity manipulation,
hyperspeed, super strength!
Dude, you're stacked!
You're as cool as Superman!
Almost.
I didn't see you
or what's happened here.
I don't wanna know.
Just don't hurt me.
- Oh, no, no, I'm not gonna hurt you.
- Thank you for your kind donation.
No, no, no, but if you
need any more help,
just look for the superhero
that still can't fly.
Forget flying, man,
we just made 73 bucks!
73 bucks?
Come on!
Hey, wait a minute.
I just got an idea.
I'd like to purchase some
of your finest beer, please.
I don't know about this.
I mean, we don't have a fake ID.
Freddy, would you relax?
Look at me, I am the fake ID.
Everything from the register!
Go! Go!
Now! Come on!
I don't have much time!
Let's go! Move!
I want it all! Hurry!
This is your chance.
Oh! I... okay.
Come on, come on,
let's do this!
Gentlemen!
Why use guns when we can
handle this like real men?
Billy, look out!
Bullet immunity.
You have bullet immunity!
I'm bulletproof.
Today is December 8th,
and this is video proof
of authenticity.
Shoot him again.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Here, here.
Go, both of you, come on.
Go to town.
W-W-W-Wait!
We still don't know if the suit
is bulletproof or if you are.
Shoot him in the face.
Shoot me in the...
in the face?
It kinda tickles.
You're dead.
- Sorry about your window.
- Have a good night.
But you're welcome
for not getting robbed!
Come on!
Let's get outta here!
Hey.
- To fighting bad guys.
- Yup.
That tastes like actual vomit.
You know,
habanero jerky,
if you eat enough of it,
it could burn a hole
in your stomach.
- Worth it.
- Yeah.
Probably not you though.
Probably got stomach superpowers.
Probably.
Oh, hey, what's up?
I'm a superhero.
Yeah, his name is, uh,
Captain Sparkle Fingers.
No it's not. No it's not!
It's not my name!
Hey, we should hang out.
We're like, the same age.
Ho! po-po. I'm out.
Hey, wait up!
I mean, it's a pretty sick view.
I totally get why Rocky was
training so hard to get up here.
I like you like this.
This is so cool.
I mean, no offense, but like,
Like, at first, you were kinda
like the opposite of how
of how Darla is.
A dick?
Your words, not mine.
But yeah.
All right, well,
I feel like every criminal
was either on drugs
or asleep by now.
Wanna head home?
Looking like this?
Yeah. I mean,
usually we'd have
a lair to go back to, but
that's long term.
Right now you have a bunk bed.
Just scares me thinking of
him out there all alone.
This is what he does, Rosa.
Difference is when
they find him,
we'll be the first
to take him back.
With open arms.
Didn't even make it two days.
Not even two days.
Baby, we did our fair share
of running off back then.
At least, I did.
Even Mary did it, twice.
That second time she ran off,
you said something
that I'll never forget.
You said,
"It's not a home till
you call it a home.
"It's something you choose."
All we can do is
give him a place full of love.
Whether he chooses
to call it a home,
that's up to him.
Gonna help me with this tree?
This tree's so sad.
H-Hello?
Just got done in the bathroom.
Oh, okay, Freddy,
sweetie, goodnight!
- Night.
- Night.
Freddy, who was that?
It's Billy, he's just really tired
and he has laryngitis.
- What? Laryngitis?
- I'm just kidding! I'm just kidding.
He's really, really tired and he
wants to go beddy bye.
- Beddy bye? What's beddy bye?
- Just hide, hide.
Billy, you're back!
Let us see you!
We're so worried about you.
I told you this was a bad idea!
Freddy?
Hey, what happened
to the stairs?
Hey, covering her mouth
like you're gonna kidnap her
is not gonna make her
less scared, okay?
Darla, it's me, it's Billy.
I know I don't look like me.
A wizard made me look like this.
Maybe don't start with wizard,
it's just gonna make
her more confused.
Some old guy brought
me to a temple
and he made me say "Shazam"...
Rosa!
Verbally-triggered body
manipulation properties!
You can switch
by saying "Shazam!"
Baby, was that you?
Are you okay?
Um...
I-I was screwing in a bulb.
Listen to me, Darla. You cannot
tell anybody about this, all right?
But it's Billy, he's a hero.
But if a supervillain
finds out that he's a hero,
that endangers us, okay?
A hero's loved ones are, like,
a perfect bad guy target.
I-Is she good
at keeping secrets?
Moderate.
- No.
- Oh, God.
Okay, listen to me.
You cannot tell a single soul
about this all right? Please.
Why? What if it's
people we trust?
'Cause good sisters
don't tell secrets.
- I'm a good sister.
- Yeah, you are.
You know what would make
you an even better sister?
Is when you fix the-
the doorknob for us.
Sweet dreams.
Sweet dreams, goodnight.
Good night.
Hello, sir, how may I help you?
Hi, sir.
Sir, you can't go in there.
Excuse me!
You cannot go in there!
Sorry I'm late.
Thad, this is for
board members only.
I'm aware of that, Father.
Now...
That night, in the car...
I swore to you
I saw something
but you never believed me.
So much easier to blame
me, wasn't it?
And say that if I hadn't
screamed that night,
you'd still have your legs.
Well, now, I have proof.
That's enough, Thad.
Dear Sid.
You think?
You know,
even before the accident,
you belittled me.
Don't make me throw you
out of here, Thad.
You don't need to make a scene.
Oh, brother...
The scene
has only just begun.
Ask that if you can
throw me out.
What?
Ask the ball if you're man enough
to throw me out of this room.
Let me spoil it for you.
Outlook...
not so good.
I've come here during
the season of giving
to give you...
what you deserve.
Oh, my God!
No! No!
No!
Help!
Somebody!
Help me!
You can't go crying to
other people all the time.
What sin best befits
you, Father? Hmm?
I'll give you anything.
Money...
The company?
You want the company?
There it is.
Greed.
Do you honestly think
all this
material you've accumulated
amounts to actual power?
This... is power.
More than you ever had.
More than anyone has.
There is one more powerful.
The wizard found his champion.
Kill the champion
before he learns
his true potential.
Or he will defeat you.
Show me where to find him.
Oh, Greed...
you can have him.
No.
No!
No!
No!
Family is more
than just a word.
This is family.
Uh, Burke?
Where's the truck?
I can hear it.
- Oh, my God!
- My truck!
- My truck!
- Are you kidding?
You know, guys...
I don't think that's
gonna buff out.
Making the cripple kid
do the dirty work, wow.
I'm a better lookout.
I can play innocent.
And I can't?
Your face gives off
a very strong vibe
of someone who's
hatching schemes.
- M-My face? This face?
- Yeah!
Okay.
You boys got a hall pass?
Oh, us? Yeah. Always.
You.
You look like
you're up to somethin'.
Me? Up to something?
No. Never.
I'm not up to something.
Our dad's picking us up.
He, uh, he got held up at the...
the business
office.
The business office, huh?
Sure, kid.
Look.
Parents or guardians
must appear physically
to check out students.
Gotcha.
Okay, well, uh,
you hear that, Dad?
- Hey.
- Shazam!
Oh, hey, there, son!
Oh, hey, there, other son
that I also have that's related
to that son I just
passed in the hallway.
I'm so sorry I'm late,
I got held up
at the business office.
Doing all the work stuff.
This is the-the security guard
all the kids admire so much.
Oh.
That's the other one.
This one sucks.
This is... that's not funny.
I gotta talk to him about that.
I apologize.
Anyway, this is me
appearing physically
to check my sons out of school.
So, thank you so much
for keeping them safe,
Detective Moron.
Don't stop me now
It's Moran.
Don't stop me now
- Ready?
- Algebra!
'Cause I'm havin' a good time
Science!
I'm a shooting star
Leaping through the sky
English!
Like a tiger
Defying the laws of gravity
Ho!
I'm a racing car passing by
Like Lady Godiva
I'm gonna go, go, go
There's no stopping me
Strength Test 1
I'm burnin' through the sky, yeah
Oh!
Two hundred degrees
That's why they call me
Mister Fahrenheit
I'm traveling
at the speed of light
I wanna make a supersonic
man out of you
Flight Test 2
Don't stop me now
I'm having such a good time
I'm havin' a ball
Don't stop me now
You okay?
If you wanna have a good time
Just give me a call
Don't stop me now
'Cause I'm having a good time
I don't want to stop at all
Laser Eyes
Test 1
I'm a rocket ship
on my way to Mars
On a collision course
I am a satellite
I'm out of control
Teleportation Test 1
I am a sex machine
ready to reload
Like an atom bomb
About to oh, oh, oh, oh,
oh, explode
I'm burnin' through the sky, yeah
Two hundred degrees
That's why they call me
Mister Fahrenheit
I'm travelin' at the speed of light
I'm so... Stop!
I wanna make a
supersonic woman of you
Don't stop me, don't stop me,
don't stop me
Hey, hey, hey!
Don't stop me, don't stop me
Ooh ooh ooh
I like it
Have a good time, good time
Don't stop me, don't stop me
Ooh ooh ooh
Hey, hey, hey!
Don't stop me, don't stop me
Have a good time, good time
Don't stop me, don't stop me
Oh!
More powerful than a locomotive.
Locomo...? What are you?
An old prospector?
Can leap tall buildings
in a single bound.
Single bound.
I'm so sorry!
I'm sorry, people! Hi!
Your phone's charged.
Your phone's charged.
Your phone's charged.
You know what?
You really need like a,
like a mic-drop catchphrase
after you do somethin' cool.
I've been thinkin' about that.
I was thinking, what about,
what about this,
"That's why you don't
mess with electricity."
Catchphrases, obviously, aren't
one of your superpowers.
And your phone's charged.
Well, you think
you could do better?
What the hell?
Let there be light.
Come on!
Just give me a call
Don't stop me now
'Cause I'm having a good time
How do I? Never mind.
Shazam!
I don't want to stop at all
Shazam!
Alright
What'd you see? What'd you see?
Were there boobies?
You see nipples?
Why aren't you talking?
We're gonna need more money.
Wow, you were in there for,
like, five minutes.
Dude, they were very convincing.
That's why they call me
Mister Fahrenheit
I'm travelin' at the speed of light
That's money... nice, nice...
Go, go, go.
If you wanna have a good time
No!
Stop, no!
- I'm not even looking.
- Stop. Stop.
I'm not even looking.
Oh!
- Oh, and done!
- What?
Finished him!
A lair?
Yes.
And obviously,
we're gonna have to be
making this purchase
anonymously.
Obviously.
And um, if you have a location,
like, on a cliff, like
a castle-esque type thing.
Overlooking some water.
Over some water,
seas below it.
- Rough, you know.
- Like waterfall, so you can, like...
Waterfall! Yeah,
if you have water... Yeah.
Look, Maximum... Voltage, is it?
You can call me Max.
Look, Max.
Why don't you just
start with how many
bedrooms you're looking for?
- One.
- Seven.
- One?
- Seven?
What? Am I runnin'
a foster home now?
See the one where he throws
the football into space?
So dope.
Hey, you know, you guys gotta
wonder who's filming those, right?
I mean, that's bravery
in and of itself.
I mean, is it though?
Yeah. I'd actually argue
maybe even more brave.
Holding a camera?
Staring in the face of danger.
Like some weirdo fanboy.
Hey, Freeman.
I-I wouldn't do that
if I were you.
What, is your bestie gonna hit
us with a wheelchair this time?
No, maybe not him but I
have another best friend.
Who might hunt you down
and destroy both of you.
- Okay, Freddy.
- You may have heard of him.
Uh, uh, the Human Powerstorm.
Frequency Flinger,
Sir-Zaps-A-Lot.
Yeah, he's a man of many names.
You know the Red Cyclone?
You?
Huh. My ass, you do.
Oh, we're a lot
closer than you think.
Maybe even at this very moment.
Prove it.
I will tomorrow. Tomorrow
he's gonna come to lunch and...
R-Right, Billy?
Oh, yeah, and then Superman's
gonna be bringing us
dessert, right?
Tomorrow, at lunch.
You'll see.
And when he doesn't show, then
we'll kick your ass.
So wait, my identity's a secret
so no one I know can get hurt.
Except when it makes
you look cool, then
then it's all good.
Billy, it's not like
they're supervillains
they're just super douchebags.
So you're breaking your own rule?
Got it.
This thing is as much as
mine as it is yours.
I'm starting to think you
think it's all your thing.
Billy, you're still gonna
do it, though, right?
I mean, what would
a good brother do?
All hands on deck!
Thank you for this family.
Thank you for this day.
Thank you for this food.
Sorry Billy's hand's on vacay.
Big news in Philly.
They found a costumed hero.
He's doing good.
Yeah, but is he, though?
Oooh, controversy.
Into it.
Share with us your
perspective, Eugene.
Just saying, he's what?
Charging people's phones?
So what? I can charge a phone...
with a plug.
Preach.
Pedro, any thoughts?
Costume's stupid?
Big white cape like, he's
getting married or something.
What if he didn't get
to pick his costume?
Ever think about that?
You're a specialist, Freddy.
What do you think?
Yeah, Freddy, let's
manage to see the positive.
Okay, well, I think
it looks like
he doesn't have gratitude
for what he's been given.
Very specific. All right.
Maybe to this superhero,
gratitude doesn't mean
having to be clingy.
"Clingy", wow, interesting take.
You know, maybe sometimes
a superhero just
wants a little me time.
You know, me time can
also be construed as
pushing away his family.
Family. Is that
what they are now?
It's a classic symptom of
superhero syndrome
coined by German psychologist
Heinrich de Von...
German something, where
superpowers become an
all-consuming narcotic.
Son, we're still eating dinner.
What he needs is a sidekick.
Name one cool sidekick.
Darla, why are you so
quiet over there, baby?
You're never
at a loss for words.
I'm eating.
Why am I still doing this?
Billy, you can't skip every day.
Not at your age.
I'm not your age anymore.
But I can go with you,
we just gotta
trick the guard out,
you know, and then...
Billy, where are you going?
You're still gonna have
lunch with me, right?
Billy?
Sir-Zaps-A-Lot's still gonna
eat in the cafeteria, right?
Here we go now
Holla if ya hear me though
Come and feel me flow
All right!
Did you check it?
People typically, like, give me
a little money, you know, to...
You're a sweet couple,
you guys have a good day.
Oh, my God.
Mary, Mary, are you okay?
How do you know my name?
Uh, how do I know
your name, uh...
Uh, one of my superpowers
is name-guessing.
Which is really weird, I bet.
Uh, it's not as cool as super
strength or super speed
but it's really helpful
when I meet new people.
Are you hurt?
No, I'm... I'm okay.
Thank you, um...
I just need a second to think.
This has been such
a weird day.
Um, using my powers
of super observation,
I see that you're holding
a letter from a college
in your hand. Are you upset
because you didn't get in?
I got in.
Uh... well, now my
superpowers are failing me
and I'm very confused.
Yeah, me too.
I don't know. I know I should be
excited 'cause this is my dream
and I worked really,
really hard for this.
But it's like...
I don't know, leaving my family
does not feel fun, you know?
Can I-Can I-Can I give you
a little piece of advice?
Don't be worried about
everybody else.
Always look out for number one.
- Gandhi said that.
- I don't think he said that.
- Yeah, he did.
- Gandhi did not say that.
- Somebody like Gandhi said that.
- Take care of number one?
It was a really wi...
It might have been Yoda.
- Listen.
- I'm sorry, no.
Agree to disagree.
The point is...
You do you, you know?
You gotta look out for you.
And get as far away from
this place as you can.
I don't know if I want to.
Of course you do.
What are you gonna do?
You're gonna live in a group
home for the rest of your life?
Look, families are for people who
can't take care of themselves.
Okay? So.
And you know, y-you can take
care of yourself, you know.
Also, look both ways
when you cross the street.
I'll just call him.
It's ringing.
Red Cyclone! Hey!
Hey, what's goin' on?
Oh, that's crazy.
Yeah, it's Freddy, by the way.
Yeah, it's crazy.
That is...
Great story.
He's not talking.
I was! I was!
We're friends.
I know him. I do.
I know... I know...
Shit.
Come on, now.
Hands. Lightning with my hands.
Lightning with my hands.
Lightning with my hands.
Hey! Hey!
Hey, young man.
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
I'm in the middle
of a show right now.
How can I help you?
I just wanna say thank you
for showing up to lunch today.
Yeah, I got a little something
called a suitcase wedgie, right?
I don't know if you've ever
heard of it, but it's when
someone grabs your
underwear like that
and hold you like a suitcase,
walks you down the hallway.
And this was my underwear.
Gross.
You said you'd come.
You said I will come,
I never said I was...
I'm a superhero, dude.
Well, you're acting real heroic.
How much are people
paying you today?
Listen, I have serious
responsibilities now, okay?
But that's cool because I can
carry that burden with my...
hands. Lightning with my hands.
Holy moley.
Don't move!
Nobody move!
Oh, no.
No, no, no, no, no.
Stay, stay.
Stay. Stay. Stay.
Oh.
Oh, that looked like it hurts.
It's him!
It's the superhero guy!
Save us!
Come on.
Come...
What's he doing?
What's going on?
What?
Oh, no. Oh, no, no.
Please don't make me do this.
That is the worst idea ever!
Oho! Oh, I did it!
I did it!
I got the bus!
I got the bus.
Nobody move in there!
I gotta put this thing down,
I gotta put this thing down.
No, no, no, doggie, doggie,
you have to move. Move!
Shoo! Shoo!
Please be a good dog.
Good dog!
Ooh, you're being a bad dog.
Go! Go!
Please go. Please move.
Yes, thank you.
Thank you. Thank you.
Thank you.
Yeah.
Yeah, no, no, no, my f...
I was in the neighborhood,
you know, so I thought...
Thank you, thank you.
You know, it's kinda
my fault, anyway.
So, it seems Philadelphia has
gotten an early Christmas present
in the form of
its very own superhero.
And we're out.
- Hey, thank you very much.
- Oh, of course, yeah.
Dude! Dude, dude!
Dude, did you see that?
Yeah, you electrocuted a bus
and almost killed these people.
And then I caught it!
Freddy! I caught a bus
with my bare hands, man!
I caught a bus like people
catch fly balls, like...
Who does that? I do that.
Billy, you do nothing, you...
you take selfies and
make people pay you.
You know what, forget it.
I can't really talk to you
when you look like this.
You just wish it was you.
No shit.
You think?
I would kill to have
what you have.
'Cause everything I do
is like, some-some
desperate attempt
to get people to notice me.
To not feel sorry for me.
I mean, look at me.
Look at me.
Do you even see me?
'Cause most people don't.
'Cause they don't want to.
And you don't either.
I mean, you think
this is who you are?
I mean, Billy, you're 14.
And now you're no
better than the Breyers.
All this power,
and all you did was turn
into a showoff and a bully.
Whatever, kid.
I do what I want!
And I'm like mid-20s, probably.
Maybe even, like, 30.
Chosen one.
The so-called perfect man.
Pure of heart.
Flawless in every way.
What made you so worthy?
I'm sorry, can I help...
can I help...?
D'you want a autograph
or somethin'?
Give me your power.
Or die.
Oh, snap.
You're like a bad guy, right?
Okay, okay, okay, okay.
Look, before this gets
really stupid for you,
you should know that
I'm basically invincible.
The weapons of man draw
no blood from our kind.
This is the...
The only thing that
extinguishes magic
is magic.
Time to transfer
your power to me.
Oho, you did not see that one
coming, did you, grandpa?
Them's street rules!
Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay!
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
I never should've punched
you in the nuts like that.
That was totally my bad.
We can talk about this.
You grovel like a child.
That's because I am one.
I-I'm a kid.
You don't want to
hurt a kid, do you?
I believe I can fly!
I believe I can fly!
I can fly!
Freddy said if I believe,
I can fly!
Then I can fly, so I believe!
I believe, oh, please!
Okay! Superman!
Superman!
What arm is it?!
Why am I not flying?!
Please, I don't wanna die!
Oh.
Whoa.
Whoa.
I'm floating!
I can fly!
Billy?
Freddy! I need your help!
You can fly?
Who's the other guy?
Santa!
So, like, what you and Mrs.
Claus do in the summertime?
Well, in some ways,
Santa's always here for you.
Oh, help!
Help Santa!
Santa needs help!
Give us a shout if you need us.
I'm just gonna chill in here for
a little while, if that's okay.
This is crazy!
This is crazy. You don't
have to fight this guy.
This isn't your job.
You can run, right?
Yes! You can run. Awesome.
Get back!
Just get... Get away!
I'm Batman.
Get him, Batman!
Come on!
Sh... Shazam!
Billy!
Billy!
Billy, where are you?
Billy!
Where are you, Billy?
Billy, come on!
Billy.
- Where is he?
- Um, supervillain.
Supervillain! Supervillain!
Worse.
Much worse.
Radioactive anthromorph.
Psychic energy manipulator.
I won't let you read my mind.
My mind is blank.
You can't get in.
I don't need to read your mind.
Because you are going to tell me.
Where is he?
Oh, my God, are you okay?
You okay?
What happened?
Are you hurt?
Come inside.
We need to have a talk.
Just don't be too
hard on him, okay?
Running out on us.
Lying.
Then I get a call
from the school
telling me you've
been cutting class.
Getting in fights.
Whoa, is that...?
What's Freddy doing
with a superhero?
What's this superhero
doing with Freddy?
You remember dinner?
When Billy and
Freddy were arguing
like an old married
couple like this?
When he rescued me, he
knew I lived in a group home.
He knew my name.
He called me Mary.
Wait.
Are you saying Billy's
the Human Powerstorm?
Yes! You guys figured it out!
All on your own.
I didn't help.
I didn't break any promises.
You knew?
I'm a good sister!
I mean, what were you thinking?
Then you bring Freddy into it.
Give him some space, guys.
He's a little upset. Okay?
Billy?
You're him.
You're the hero.
Yeah, well, not anymore, so.
Why do you have my notebook?
Eugene finished you search.
Look, I'm not a hacker, okay?
But I have played
Watchdogs and Uplink.
And maybe I did
pick up a few skills
which maybe did get me
into federal databases
most people can't get into, but...
Good for you,
but I'm gonna go.
Your parents' names
are Marilyn and C.C. Batson.
What?
You were born in
Zumbrota, Minnesota.
They divorced when
you were three.
Your mom moved here that year.
20 months later, you got lost.
You never found them 'cause
your dad's been in prison
in Florida for 10 years.
And your mom's...
What?
Is she dead?
She's two subway stops away.
What?
You know, you didn't find her
because she reverted
to her maiden name.
Hey, Billy! Billy!
Victor, get the keys.
Kids, stay here,
in case Billy comes back.
Get inside. Let's go.
Wait. I thought we were
running after Billy?
No, we're gonna
wait here for now.
Billy?
Freddy?
Oh, how quaint.
Actually, I take that back.
What a shithole.
Just a second.
Hey, look, I'm late for
work already, all right?
We don't need any
magazines or whatever.
Oh, I'm not.
You probably don't
recognize me, but
I found my way home.
Mom.
It's me.
Oh, God.
Is it?
Um, hang on.
Who's at the door?
It's um...
It's no one, Travis.
That wasn't Dad, was it?
No, I...
Listen, it's um...
It's really you, huh?
I didn't mean to run away.
You know that, right?
I let go but it was by
accident, I...
Yeah, I know, I know.
I saw you.
What?
I saw you after.
So, it was never your fault.
I was 17.
And my dad, he kicked me out.
And your dad just...
decided not to be
a part of anything.
And I was hurting
and I was screwed up.
I wanted the tiger.
I know, I know, honey, but
Mom's not exactly going pro
here, okay?
Billy?
Billy!
Billy!
Jesus Christ, Billy,
this isn't funny!
Here you go, buddy.
But it's just once
I saw you with the police,
I realized that
they could do a better job taking
care of you than I ever will.
But you're good, right?
I mean you landed on your feet.
'Cause, I mean, you look real good.
It's just...
Now is not a really
good time for me, Billy.
All I wanted to do was
let you know
I'm doing good, but...
I have to get back
to my real family, so.
Here.
What's this?
Marilyn! What's
going on out there?
You might need it
more than me.
Freddy, you were right.
Sorry I yelled at you.
Come home, Billy.
Come home.
Billy! Supervillain!
Supervillain!
Shazam!
Who are you?
What do you want?
What do I want?
I want...
That.
Whoa.
Kick his ass, Billy!
Oh, God.
Yes, Billy.
Try it, by all means.
Let them go and I'll come inside.
Oh, first you come inside,
then maybe I'll let them go.
Good boy.
'Cause that's all you are, isn't it?
How old are you?
- Basically, 15.
- Hmm.
When I was a child,
the old man told me
I wasn't good enough.
And here you are,
a coward.
Run from me?
And that wizard chooses you.
You're not a hero.
But I'm gonna give you
the opportunity to be one.
Give me the power
of a champion.
No, don't do it, Billy!
Give me the power
and I'll let them go.
Darla, no.
Don't, don't go, Billy!
Don't go! Don't go, Billy!
No, no, I-I have to,
I have to, it's...
It's what a good brother
would do, right?
Billy.
I dedicated my life
to getting here.
I scoured the earth.
No one believed me.
No one helped.
Not the wizard.
Not my family.
I only had myself.
I get it.
I get what that's like.
Feeling like you're
all alone in the world.
Stand.
Feeling like there's that one
thing, if you could just find it.
Then you'd finally
be good enough.
Stand.
The champion's name.
Say it.
Look, no offense, mister,
but I don't think these things
have your best interest at heart.
Don't listen to this child.
Take the staff.
Hold it and say
the champion's name.
They're using you.
You have to see that.
That they are using you.
Say your name.
His name...
is Captain Sparklefingers.
And we're gonna
keep throwing things
at your big, fat, ugly ass head
until you let our brother go.
Boy, am I glad I didn't
sell that batarang.
Pedro, is that a lamp?
- It's an ugly one.
- Come on, come on, come on.
Guys, I appreciate the
thought, I really do.
But I don't think your
weapons are gonna help.
You can put 'em down now.
The door was right here.
Billy, how do we
get out of here?
What, you think I know?
I don't know.
This way!
Go, go, go, go, go with Darla.
Good job, Darla!
Go, go, go, go!
Kids?
Why is this open?
Freddy?
Mary?
Freddy, Freddy, keep up.
Darla, stay in front.
We gotta hurry.
- Whoa.
- Whoa.
So many doors.
One of these has to be
a way out, right?
Yeah, I would hope so.
Not this one.
Okay, no more doors.
Nobody open any more doors.
Come on, Billy,
what are we gonna do?
Darla, I don't know.
Billy, yes, you do,
just-just think.
How'd you get out last time?
Well, uh, l-last time I
thought about the subway
and I was on the subway.
Then Billy, look,
think about the subway.
Think about any place
except for here, okay?
Come on, come on, come on.
Why are you covering my eyes?
Really? This is the first place
you think of? Wow!
You're welcome.
Why can't I see what's inside?
You are not old enough.
Old enough to know
that was great music.
Not my thing.
Where's Freddy?
Yeah, you too, Sriracha, hey,
have a holly, jolly Christmas.
Freddy, what are you doing?
Ah, it's nice people.
- Nice pe...? Come on.
- Is that glitter?
They have glitter.
Can I get glitter?
- No, not from them.
- Please?
Go, go, go, go!
Everybody go!
Freddy, Freddy, Freddy.
One, two, three,
hold onto me.
Carnival. Go, go, go.
Mary, go.
Go. Come on, Pedro.
Come on.
Walk, just be cool,
act naturally,
like kids naturally act
in a carnival.
- He's not gonna look for you...
- Is that him?
Oh, my God, guys.
Hey, Powerboy.
He's an impersonator, okay?
I'm an impersonator.
I'm a fake version of myself.
Don't take pictures...
Shazam!
Hey, where'd he go?
Oh, man, oh, man,
I just spit on a baby!
Yo, what is that?
Champion!
You don't deserve that name.
Hiding behind innocent people
who will now die.
Because deep down, you're
still just a scared, little boy.
Oh, no.
Run!
Run!
- What do we do? What do we do?
- Hold on!
- To what?
- The bar, you idiot!
Well, you wanted me to be a hero.
Are you kidding?
Okay, no. Old guy's up there
harboring multiple
spiritual entities,
plus, I mean, he has
the same powers as you,
plus, you know, a-and
he knows what he's doing,
plus, you're my best friend,
I don't want you to die.
If a superhero
can't save his family,
he's not much of a hero.
That was a decent catchphrase.
Shazam!
Now let's try this again.
Or try that again.
Billy, look out!
Laser eyes?
Guys, he's got laser eyes!
Too bad your aim sucks balls!
His power matrix.
His what what?
When the demon guys leave
his eye, he loses his powers.
That's why the
batarang hurt him.
Hey, over here!
W-What are you doing?
Trust me. Divide and conquer.
We separate the sins from the
eye, and he's just an old man.
Gather the mutts.
Here, take it.
Take it, it's for you.
Hold it tight.
Close your eyes.
Everything's gonna be okay.
Okay?
Okay.
Get up.
Shazam!
Playtime's over, boy.
Your friends can't
help you anymore.
Hey!
Shazam!
Nice trick.
Catchy.
One simple word.
I have a better trick.
Four words.
Kill the little girl.
- No, please!
- No!
Stop!
Billy, there's one more
demon guy in his eye!
You gotta just
rip it out of his face...
It's where he gets his power.
Reach for it.
I dare you.
Wise decision.
Hands on the staff.
Billy, don't do this. Billy!
- Billy!
- Don't do it, Billy!
Say my name
so my power may
flow through you.
I open my heart to you,
Billy Batson.
And in so doing,
choose you as champion.
With your heart,
unlock your greatest power.
The thrones of our
brothers and sisters await!
All hands on deck.
Say my name.
Billy!
No, not my name. No.
Say the name that I say
to turn into this guy.
Shazam!
Guys.
What's happening?
I can fly!
Guys.
Check out these guns.
No.
It's not possible!
Gee whiz, mister.
Sorry I took your game.
You want it back?
Guys, I don't believe in violence,
but I think we should kick this
guy's butt, like, really hard.
Guys, I think
I can move really
fast.
Hyperspeed!
Check!
Billy!
The eye.
Look out!
Whoa!
What?
You almost exploded me!
Dude, I've studied
the fighting techniques
of every single superhero.
What do you got?
Well, that's terrifying.
Enough games, boy.
You think a pack of children can...
Wait, what?!
You will beg for mercy
as I feast on your heart.
Slow...
Are you making
some big, evil guy
speech right now or something?
You're like, a mile
away from me right now.
There's cars and trucks...
I will have the world eating
out of the palm of my hand...
All I see is mouth moving.
I don't hear any...
Only I
have the power to unleash...
Oh, whatever, screw it.
Oh, my gosh, those people!
Hi!
I caught you!
I got it!
I got it!
Oh, my God, I do got it.
You're not gonna believe this,
but you're actually the
first villain I've ever fought.
It's, like, kind of
a huge deal for me.
Somebody help!
Hadouken!
Hi!
Wow, it's really you.
My name is Darla
and I've been really good!
What?
Oh, crap.
No, no, no, no.
No, no!
Oh, my God!
I'm giving you suitcase wedgies!
So this is about your
Seven Deadly Sins, right?
I mean, I've never been
great at math, but uh...
The big, angry one,
that's Wrath, yeah?
And then Gluttony, obvi.
Pride.
Greed and Sloth, Lust, who
I thought was gonna be
way hotter, if I'm being honest.
But that's only six. Where's...
Where's lucky number seven?
Where's little man?
Where's Envy?
Is he just scared of me and my
family 'cause we're so awesome?
'Cause I get that.
Like, the other sins, they
get to come out and fight
'cause they're big
and strong and scary.
But Envy,
he's just a runt.
And that's why
all the other sins
never invite him
out to play, man.
'Cause they all know who'd win.
And it's not weak,
worthless, ugly
Envy.
No!
Gotcha.
Shazam!
Shazam!
Ready to go
round up your buddies?
No.
No!
Here's the thing about power.
What good's power
if you got nobody
to share it with?
- Nice.
- Ta-da.
That's disgusting.
Fatality.
I got the voice.
What's that?
I can have anything
I've ever wanted?
Billy, no.
No, no, no, no!
- You should hear yourself.
- That's not funny.
What, you think I'm gonna
put a demon ball in my head?
That's disgusting.
- It's not funny.
- Pretty funny. You got me going.
Uh, guys, guys.
What?
Oh, hey.
Oh, wow.
- Oh.
- Oh.
All right, we did it!
- Whoo!
- All right! Yeah!
Thank you!
We did it!
Yeah, you guys are all safe.
There's no more danger.
You sure this is gonna work?
Told ya.
You guys know
what this place is, right?
A dark, haunted cave
with demon statues.
Well, yes, but also...
Lair!
We got a lair!
Lair.
- Lair.
- We got a lair.
What's a lair?
And thanks to six superheroes,
citizens are back in their homes
safe again with their families.
And here with an eyewitness
account of the events...
It was fing crazy, man!
Creatures from fing hell!
Lightning coming out of
everyone's fing everything.
And that is not fing cool, man!
I'm tired of it.
This will be
An everlasting love
Guys,
all hands on deck.
Oh!
W-W-W-Wait!
Wait.
Thank you for this food.
Thank you for this day.
Thank you for this family.
I thought maybe
this time I'd stay.
I mean, after all,
I'm home.
Nope.
Okay.
What are you doin'?
Waiting for your
imaginary BFF to show up?
What are you guys doing here?
Well, we're having lunch with you.
But you guys have
different lunch periods.
Well, we made a very
special arrangement.
Darla, what's going on?
Why are you asking me?
Freddy Freeman!
This guy...
taught me everything I know
about being a dope superhero.
True story, you should
get some pointers
from him. What's goin' on,
my best bud...
in the whole world?
And also new kids that I'm
meeting for the first time
but seem very cool?
Uh... huh,
I invited another friend,
I hope that's okay.
Huh!
subs by enwansix