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Sing (2016)
Whoops.
Places, everyone. This was it. The moment it all began. The moment an ordinary little guy fell in love with the theater. Everything about it. The lights, the way the scenery moved, even the smell. He was only six years old, but his plans to become the first koala bear in space were suddenly toast. - -Some folks may have said he grew up to be the greatest showman the city has ever seen. -Some called him a visionary, a Maverick. - sure, some folks said he was as crazy as he was stubborn, but I say wonder and magic don't come easy, pal. And, oh, there would never be any doubt, the name buster moon would go down in entertainment history. And I should know, - because I am buster... - Moon! - Open this door! - Good morning, Mr. moon. Miss crawly. What, uh... What's going on? You got a lot of animals waiting to see you, Mr. moon. I do? Holy moly, I really do. Yeah, it's the stage crew from your last show. They say their paychecks bounced. Tell 'em I'll call up the bank and make sure they're paid tout de suite. Oh, I got Judith from the bank holding on line two right now, sir. -Um, actually, I'm gonna have to call her back. -Oh. What should I tell her this time? Tell her buster moon is out to lunch. Moon! Open this door! Come on, moon! I know you're in there! Moon! Open this door! Aah! Hmm, thought I heard someone singing there. Ah, whatever. Guys, listen. Stay where you are. The cops are here in... What are you...? -Hold it right there! -Yeah, I'll get him! - Go, go, go! Whoa! Whoa! Johnny, you were supposed to be keeping a lookout! Sorry, dad. And where's your mask? Look at me. I'm mommy! Caspar, get off the table. Rosita, have you seen my car keys? Norman, would you please tell them what a good singer I am? Oh, yeah, you were great, honey. By the way, the bathroom sink is blocked again. Bye, honey! One, two, one, two, three, four! Oh, my gosh. I thought you guys said you were musicians. Ash, babe, I'm the lead singer, okay? Just stick to the backing vocals. Sorry, I... I get carried away. Yeah, I know, right? It just kind of ruins my song, you know? Aw. What? - Come on, make your wish. I wish you'd join a choir. A local band or something. -I tried. -Bah! Hey, hey, dad, we've been over this. So she's a little shy. So what? If I had a voice like meena's, I'd be a superstar by now! - Now blow out your candles. A penny? How dare you! I happen to have studied at the Lincoln school of music. Sorry, it's-it's all i got right now. --Oh, is that so? -All right, prove it, pal. -What? - Empty your pockets right now. -Trying to find... -Wh-what is this you got here? -Just trying to find... What do you smoke out of this? That's my inhaler. Aha! I knew it! You all saw it. You all saw it right here. - The monkey lied. I forgot I had that. And next time, pick on someone your own size! Bully! Take care of her, will you? She may look old and rusty, but she is a classic. Okay, listen. We both know that my theater has been going through some pretty rough times lately, but as the saying goes, "for every cloud, a silver lining." -Hup-hup-hup-hup-hup-hup. -We've got... Hold on right there, buster. My dad, he heard I was gonna see you today, and he was all like, "Eddie, you tell that koala "I'm not funding any more of those shows, and that's final." Those were his words. Well, your dad's right. Those shows were the problem. War of attrition. Rosie takes a bow. I mean, nobody wants to see that stuff anymore. So, what do I do? -Quit? -No. I give 'em a show they cannot resist, which is gonna be... J-just one more minute, s'il vous plat. - -Merci. Don't speak French. They speak English here. Now, my next show is gonna be-- drumroll, please... ...a singing competition. A singing competition? Who wants to see another one of those? Everyone! J-j-just think. Your neighbor, the-the-the grocery store manager, that-that-that chicken-- right there! Everyone in this city gets a shot at being a star live on my stage. Buster, this is a terrible idea. Oh, no, it's not. Real talent from real life. That's what audiences want, and I'm gonna give it to 'em! All right, well... C-can we please just get out of here? Don't you want to eat? Yeah, but we can't afford any of this. Yes, I know, and that's why... I brought sandwiches. Uh... That's not allowed. Ugh. What, you don't like peanut butter and jelly? - Excuse me, sir. - Okay, look. I got cream cheese, i got banana... -You okay? -Yep. Never better. Miss crawly? Hello? Uh, who is it? It's me. Your boss, Mr. moon. -Oh, hello, Mr. moon. -There we go. Now, I need you to add the following information -to our publicity flyers. -Yes, sir. The winner of the singing contest will receive a grand prize of... $935. Hmm. Gonna need more than that. Just a second. There. There! $1,000. - You got that? - -Uh, $1,000... Oh! Oh! Print 'em up on every single sheet of paper we have left and let's spread the word right away, okay? Yes, uh, yes, sir. Oh, okay. Come on out of there. Ah, the winds of change. Yep, when this show's a hit, I'm gonna get you a fresh coat of paint. How are we doing with those flyers, miss crawly? Oh, yes, sir. We're all good to go here. Miss crawly, no! No, no, no, no, no, no! Oopsie-Daisy. Oh, well, I guess that's one way to spread the word. Hey, Lance, look at this. Ash, babe, hey! -You make a withdrawal! -Yeah. Meena! --Hey, hey, hey! What do you think you...? Uh-huh. Yeah. Ow. Mmm. Ah. Let's go to work. And cue the crazy old lizard. Good morning, Mr. moon. Indeed it is, miss crawly. Top of the morning to you. I made you some coffee. You did? Where is it? Oh, I got a little thirsty on the way up those stairs. -Shall I go open the doors now? -The doors? Well, you've got a lot of animals waiting in line to audition, Mr. moon. I do? Holy moly, I really do. I swear to you, Eddie, this is no joke. Look, just get down here and see for yourself. I gotta go. This is it, miss crawly. Get your scaly tail downstairs and throw those doors open wide. Okay, uh, one at a time, please. Calm down. - Bye, iggy. Bye, Perry. Bye, Carla. - bye, Gail. Bye, Rory. Bye, Mickey. Bye, moe. Bye, Nelson. Bye, Hannah. Bye, Tess. Bye-bye, caspar. Phew! Uh, let's hear from a few more of the folks in line. -What about you, sir? -Well, Bob, I'm a lab technician for a leading pharmaceutical company, but I was born with a gift. And that gift is to sing. Oi, dad. Just going out. Well, don't be long. I got the gang coming over. Well, look, I mean, I'm sure you're gonna get a lot of namby-pamby animals in here saying things like, "oh, it's not winning. It's the taking part that counts." Yeah, yeah. Not me, pal. I'm here to win. That prize, it's mine. Wow! Thank you, Johnny. Okay, next up, -we have meena. -Good luck out there. All right, come on. Here we go. Come on, you can do it. You can do it. Okay... Oh, I'm s... Oh, I'm sorry. Uh... Okay. Hey, it's all right. You know, it's all right. Take it away, meena. Uh... okay. Uh... -Mmm... um... -Anytime, now. Uh... Do you want to start over? -Um... uh... -All right, enough of that. That's quite enough of that. That's it. Come on. Off the stage, Helga. Go on. You're useless. Thanks. Right. Here we go. Hit it! Okay, that's everyone, Mr. moon. Whew! All right, call everyone back to stage, miss crawly, and let's get... --Hello! -Ooh. Uh, can I have everybody back to stage, please? Everyone come back to stage for selection. Okay. Thank you, miss crawly. - You're welcome, Mr. moon. All right. - Let's see, now. Hmm. I'll take... -You guys. -Yes! And which one of you is the girl? Ha ha. Very funny. "Loud and horrible, but shows promise." Welcome to the show. Cool. I guess we could hang. No, no. I just want her, not you. What? All right, the rest of the group acts, thank you so much. Oh, don't feel bad, folks. There will be a ten percent discount on tickets for everyone. Yeah, sure, thanks a lot. Let's get out of here, ash. Ash? Uh, yeah... Yeah, let's go. Okay, soloists. Johnny, Mike, Pete, Richard, Daniel and ray. Mike! Ooh-hoo-hoo! Wowza! I've gotta have you in my show. Oh, I... if you insist. And I'll take Pete... Ooh, yeah! And one more. - Let me see, now. --Oh, my gosh, I am so sorry. --Oh, what is wrong with me? Um, thanks for coming, Richard. Oh... - Oh, my... ray! - Are you all right? - -Uh-huh. Just hang in there, ray. I got you. --Ooh. Oh. Whoopsie. Oh. Okay, then I'll take... Daniel. Thank you, Johnny. --Daniel, can you hear me? You're in the show! What? Are you talking to me? - Yes. I was saying that you are in... Oh, geez, this is gonna drive me nuts. Johnny, get back here. You're in. - Thank you, Daniel. Good-bye. Yes! Okay. That's everyone on my list. Um, wait a second. Rosita. -Is Rosita still here? -Oh, yes. Yes, I'm here. Rosita, Rosita, Rosita. Great set of pipes, but boring to watch. I knew it. So, what should I do? I could partner you up with gunter. Gunter! Where are you? Ja! Ja! This is me. Ja! It's gonna spice things up on stage. Wait. You want us to sing together? Ja! The two of us together, you joking me? We're going to be spicy, no? That koala's a fool, Sherry-Anne. You are going to be a star one day! Auditions are over, pal. - Show's already been cast. - Okay... You are my chosen few. - Yes! This is it, folks. A defining moment in all of our lives. Um, no. No, no, no, not you guys. I dismissed all of the group acts already. You... you can go home. Look, look, look, i-I'm really sorry, but all of the slots are filled. --No, no, no, no, listen. No in show. - Good-bye-bye. - Miss crawly! Come on, you guys, out... out of here. Come on, off the stage. - Thank you so much. - Hey, moon. What's the story? Is the prize really inside this thing? The prize? Oh, sure. Yes, it's all... It's all in there. Well, open it, will you? I want to see what $100,000 looks like. -Yeah, come on. -Me, too. -Let's have a look. -Open it. Yeah, yeah, go on. Open it, Mr. moon. For sure, I'll open it. Wait. What did you say? He said $100,000. A hundr... Uh... I forgot my keys. Koala be right back. For the last time, miss crawly, I'm not going to fire you. Now, would you pull yourself together, and please blow that nose of yours. --No, no, no, not in here. -Blow it outside. -I'm sorry, Mr. moon. -Thank you. -Buster, what do you expect? -She's like 200 years old. -Eddie, please, look. If-if your folks could just loan me the money until... $100,000? Buster, come on. Hoo! I gotta think. I've gotta think. I've gotta think. I've got to come up - with a solution... -Look, maybe it's time to stop thinking and it's time to just move on. I mean, this theater of yours, you could get some decent money for it and... I don't know, maybe we could do something together. What? What, sit around playing video games? Do you know what that is? Uh, it's a bucket? Yes, and do you know why i have this bucket? 'Cause the roof is leaking? No, that's the bucket for the leak. I have this one 'cause it belonged to my father. Every day for 30 years, he worked his tail off washing cars just so I could buy this place. Every day, Eddie. Just for me. --Wow. Sounds like a great dad. So, how do you want to handle this? Oh, Mr. moon, i got Judith from the bank holding on line two again. Well, there's only one thing I can do. Okay, everybody, listen up. -Shh, shh, shh. -I gotta send you all home. Right now. -What? -Huh? -Yep. 'Cause, like my dad used to say, "get a good night's sleep and do a great day's work." That's right. Rehearsals begin first thing tomorrow morning. And if you want to become stars and win 100 grand, then you better be ready to work harder than you've ever worked in your lives. So get some sleep and dream big dreams. Miss crawly! Okay, come on. That's enough now. Come on, off the stage. Please. -Dream big dreams? -I know, it's good, right? What about the 100 grand? Don't you worry, Eddie. There's got to be a way to get it. What? Buster, no, listen to me! This show is not gonna save your theater. You're at rock bottom, pal. Yep, and you know what's great about hitting rock bottom, Eddie? There's only one way left to go, and that's up. And you can see the lucky few leaving the theater behind me. Now back to you in the studio, John. --Oh, honey, please don't cry. You are not a failure. There'll be other chances. -You just... -Bah! The heck there will! Dad, please. Come on! Don't you want this? Well, sure, but I messed it up. Then you gotta go back there tomorrow and say, "Mr. moon, I demand you let me re-audition!" Be confident! Show 'em you ain't gonna be pushed around! You got that, meena? -Um... -Good! Now, go get my cocoa. Would you stop? I'd only be doing it for us. Oh, really? Yes, really. If I won that money, we could build our own recording studio, start our own label. I mean, the whole world would get to hear your songs. Oh... Hey! Uh, just a min... Oh, oh, wait. W-wait! Oh, look at... I know Derek, the manager. He'll vouch for me. Come on! Hey, Mario. How's it going? Oh, for crying out loud. Oh, yeah, oh, let the bears in. Let the bears in. Fine. There he is! I got a surprise for you, my son. --What's that? -Tell him the plan. -Right. We've been told there's a ship carrying 25 million in gold, gonna dock at night right here. With the usual guards here and here. But, lucky for us, there's a sewer right under here. So the getaway driver meets us here. And that is gonna be you this time, Johnny. -What? You want... You want me to drive? -Yeah. It's time my boy had a proper role in the gang, eh? Hang on, hang on, dad. Barry's always been our driver. Barry don't mind. Do you, Barry? -No. No, that's fine. -Yeah. So... so, when exactly is this ship coming in, then? We ain't got a date yet. Probably won't be for a while, though, will it? What do you care? It's the last job we ever need to do. When it comes in, we go. Right? Great. Can't wait. - Um, hi. I saw your ad in the paper. Yes, I need a nanny just for a couple of weeks. You can? Great. Oh, the kids? Yes, they're wonderful. They... yeah, I have 25. No, I'm... I'm not joking. - Um, but they're really no problem... - - hello? Hello? Good night, mommy. Hey. How was the big meeting? That bad, really? Well, I have something really exciting to tell you. Mmm. You make the best pie, honey. Listen, Norman, i know it's short notice, but I could really use some help with the kids tomorrow because... well, you are not gonna believe what I did today. Norman, are you listening to me? Rehearsals begin first thing tomorrow morning, so get some sleep and dream big dreams. Hmm. Good morning, everybody. Now, I want you all dressed before breakfast. Breakfast! Rosita, have you seen my car keys? Don't forget, your keys are in your coat pocket. Oh, I found 'em. - Bye, honey. - -Bye, Norman. Time for school. Bye, iggy. Bye, Perry. Bye, Carla. Bye, Gail. Bye, Rory. Bye, Mickey. Bye, moe. Bye, Nelson. Bye, Hannah. Bye, Tess. Bye, Kelly. Bye, George. Bye, Andy. Bye, Freddy. Bye-bye, caspar. This contest is war. This stage is the battlefield. Your song is your weapon. Now, you only get one shot to blow that audience away, so choose carefully from the list of songs I've selected for each of you. Ah, talked some sense into that boyfriend of yours. Lance is an artist, but I wouldn't expect you to understand that. You're right. I don't understand that at all. Now, you'll notice each list also includes my costume - and performance suggestions. Okay? Miss crawly will show you to your rehearsal spaces. Now, let's get to work. Excuse me, Mr. moon? For some reason, it says here that I should be playing the piano? Yes, just imagine-- big, soulful guy like you tenderly playing the keys. There'll be goose bumps everywhere. Well, I haven't played piano since I was a kid. Miss crawly, we're gonna need some piano lessons over here. Yes, sir! Up the stairs. I'll be right along. And, Pete, you're in here. - You got it, Mr. moon. -Check your ego, man. -Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. -Break it up, break it up, break it up. -Oh, yeah? Tell ricki. He started it. That's right. Just like I started this band. My band, Howie. Oh, forgive me, your highness. - Guys, come on. No, no, no, no, no. Hey, hey. Out. Get out of here. --Look, just calm down and pick a song. -Wow! -I think we'll probably have a better chance of winning if I do the singing part and leave the dancing part to you. Bah! Are you joking me? You are just in need of, like, a super cool warm-up. --Come on, let's take off - these clothes. That... that is not necessary. Oh! That is a lot of skin. Ah, don't you look so worried face. I've got one for you, too. Hey, porky! -Keep it down, will you? -Sorry. Hey, moon, you gave me the wrong list. Cheesy pop's not exactly my style. Style. I'm glad you brought that up. Now, let's see. - There. Isn't this a great color for you? I can't tell. It's melting my eyes. -You got anything in black? -Black? What, you want everyone to think you're going to a funeral? You think you're some kind of artsy-fartsy type? No, no, no, no, no. Bingo! Pop star Princess! Is this part of the competition? Okay, everybody, don't panic. - Don't panic. - What's going on? Talk to me, crawly. When did we last pay the power company, Mr. moon? Oh, for Pete's sake. Okay, don't worry, everybody. I will take care of this. In the meantime, you will continue to rehearse in the dark. -What? -But I can't see anything. - Don't you worry, Rosita. I have glow sticks. Great. Use this time to shake off those first-day inhibitions, and I'll be right back. -You gotta be kidding me. -Okay, you heard him. - Back to work now. Come on, everybody. Whoa! Sorry, old girl. I'll fix that. - Mr. moon? You-you probably don't remember me, but i-i auditioned yesterday, and I... Hey, listen. Do you think maybe you could reach the ledge? Th-that ledge? Whoa! Whoa, that's a heck of a trunk you've got there. Thanks a lot, kid. Uh, Mr. moon? M-my name is meena, and I baked a cake for you, and, uh... uh, I was wondering if you'd maybe give me -a second chance to... -Just a moment, please. Be right with you. Hmm. Yay! It's about time. Johnny... Yep, mind your head here. Hey, can you pull up that scenic cable? -You mean this? -Yes, that's it. Great! And the house lights? Wow. Ah, I know. Beautiful, isn't she? You know what, kid? How would you like to be a part of this show? Really? Wait. Oh, my gosh, I was just gonna ask about that. Great. 'Cause I could really use a stagehand. Stagehand? -But... -Ah, don't worry about it. You're gonna pick it up in no time. I'll teach you everything i know. Follow me. These are the rehearsal spaces and dressing rooms, and up here we got workshops and the main office. Up in the air! Touch your toes! Awesome. Awesome? Yeah, I think the word you're after is "awful." And that's me restraining myself. There's not an ounce of talent between 'em. Not an ounce. In fact, you know what? I think that prize is as good as mine already. Yes, indeed, uh, i am about to come into a very, very large sum of money. $100,000, to be precise. Well, is that so? In that case, sir, you'll be wanting our platinum card. Well, well, well, hello again. Oh, man, these are, like, the cheesiest songs of all time. I know, right? I mean, I was even thinking of writing my own song instead. Wait, what? -Your own song? -Well, yeah. Look, if you want to win that money, just do what the koala says. Why? You think I can't write my own song? Whoa, whoa. I'm just saying, not everyone can write songs, okay? I know I make it look easy, babe, but it's not. Oh, here she is. - Quiet down, everybody. So, meena, are you in the show? Uh... well, yeah, kind of, but... She did it! Oh, I'm so proud of you, i could pop! That's my birthday wish coming true right there! -Way to go, meena! -Oh, meena, we love you! Mom... -What the heck? -Wait a minute, wait a minute. Don't be mad, okay? It was your grandma. She told the whole street about your audition. -Mom, no, wait. -Shh, shh. Shush, baby. You need to save that singing voice of yours. So, from now on, just nod or shake your head, okay? How was that, dad? You're still too soft on them corners, Johnny. You got to attack 'em. And you're crunching the gears. I told you, you got to be gentle with the... Look, turn that down. Oi! Listen to your father! "Too soft on the corners, Johnny." "You're not doing it right, Johnny." "Speed up, Johnny." "Do it like I showed you." Whoa! Dad? Oh, no. I've run over my dad. Now, that is more like it. And the three little pigs - lived happily ever after. Good night, my dears. Norman, are you awake? How was your day, honey? Same as always. -It was? -Mm-hmm. I don't know how you do it all, honey. -Good night. -Good night. All creatures great and small, - welcome to the moon theater! Mr. moon? -I have Judith from the bank. -What? Whoa, no, no, no. Tell her I'll call her back in the morning. Oh, I can't. She's right here. Judith! Hello. I work for a bank, not a charity, and if your accounts are not settled -by the end of the month... -Okay, Judith... I personally guarantee, by the end of this month, this show is going to be the biggest hit this city has ever seen. Mr. moon, none of your shows have ever worked. None of them! You've had your chances. Now, settle your accounts, or we will repossess this property. Okay. Toodle-oo. What are you going to do, Mr. moon? Honestly, uh... I have no idea. Mmm. Are you wearing a speedo, Eddie? What... what are you...? Eddie? Is everything all right? Yeah, uh, just doing my laps, ma! So, what, you live in the pool house now? Yeah, my folks want me to be more, you know, independent, I guess. They even hooked me up with this life coach dude. -Life coach? -Yeah. I guess he's gonna help me find my purpose in life. I thought I had one, but it turns out it wasn't the right one or something. I don't know. Anyway, he's got me on this whole schedule thing. It's, like, mondays, take out the recycling; Tuesdays, mow the lawn; Wednesdays, go visit Nana; Thursdays, clean the pool. It's like, don't we have people to do all of this stuff? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Back up. Your Nana is still alive? Oh, yeah. Wow. And she's rich, right? She's loaded. But trust me, you don't want to go near my Nana. She is one mean sheep. Good. Lower the moon. -Coffee? -Thank you, miss crawly. Okay, that's normal. Just needs a knock. --See? You're getting it. Anyone seen my glass eye? The darn thing keeps popping out. Whoa! You almost killed me, jumbo! -It wasn't me. -Oh, is that so? - Pete? Pete! - You're gonna be all right. - Okay, just... - - just hang in there, buddy. - Ricki? Kai? Why aren't you guys rehearsing? We're through. They said I'm an intolerable egomaniac. I don't even know what that means. All right. We're two acts down. Give me some good news, miss crawly. Oh, it's not as bad as it looks. Uh... - Oopsie-Daisy. Meena, how would you like to re-audition for the show? Really? Well, yeah. -Great. -I mean, no. What? I-i mean, yes, I can sing. But no, i-i get so nervous, and... i-i can't do it. I mean, I would totally do it, but... no, I... no. I'm gonna take that as a maybe. Great! Look, they're back. Uh, we're gonna come back to this, meena. Listen, guys, forget what I said before. You are very talented. Please, join the show, okay? Yes? No? Oh, um... here. What? Hey, no, no, no. Wait, wait, wait, wait. D-don't go, don't go! Oh, what is this for? Now, we use this to follow the steps. Caspar! Caspar, no! How about this? Ha-ha! - Come on. What did I tell you? I'm so sorry. He had a fever, and it was too late to get a sitter, so... --Well, you seem fine now. Wow! --I am not singing this. What's not to like? You're a female, and you're a teenager. This song was made for you. Wow. It's like you can see inside my tiny teenage mind. I know, right? You just gotta add some moves and a little bit of... -Go for it! -Oh, you mean like this? There you go. You're a natural. Yes, that was very bad. Johnny. Come in. Over. Oh, Johnny, your jacket's talking. Johnny, where are you? Dad, what's going on? Over. What do you mean, you gotta leave now? I know. I'm... I'm so sorry. It's just, I've got this family business thing. Do I need to start worrying about your commitment here, Johnny? -Tell me no. -No. Absolutely not. I promise it won't happen again. -It better not. -Thank you, Mr. moon. Hi. I'm Becky. Becky? Hey, what did you expect? You're never around anymore. I did it for us, Lance! You and me! Oh, sweetie, I'm sorry. I think I left my sunglasses in there. Come on, Becky. Let's get out of here. Jackpot, baby! -Whoo-hoo! -Ooh! Well, I say we call it a night there, fellas. Hey, uh, put the cash in my car, will you, Derek? Well, you're one great card player, Mike. - Not so bad yourself. -Ooh... Except I still can't tell how you cheated. Cheated? Cheated? Oh, I am offended. Come on, baby, let's cut some rug. Oh! Wh-what the...? Oh. How did that get there? -Run for it, baby! -Hey! Whoo! Get him! Excuse me. Don't let him get away! -Thanks, Derek. -Out of the way. So long, suckers! Good morning, buster. -Hey, Eddie. How are you? -Good. -How's the show going? -Ah, it's going great. Hey, that's a sharp jacket you've got on today. Oh, thanks. Wait. What are you doing here? Eddie, you can't come visit your Nana without bringing her some flowers. -Here. -What? No! Buster, no! Don't go in there! Yes, can I help...? -Buster! -Ah, Nana! Just look at you, dear. Wow! You don't look a day over 90. Oh, my gosh. Buster moon. We met at Eddie's graduation. Oh, lucky me. A visit from my useless grandson and his ghastly little theater friend. Look at that-- she remembers me. Okay, Nana... How would you like to be the sponsor for a very prestigious prize? Not for that singing contest i saw on the news. That's the one. Oh, I see. You don't have the money, do you? Well, we don't quite have it all locked in... Well, you'll not get a cent out of me. Nana, please, just listen to me -for one second, okay? -No, absolutely not. -Don't listen to him, Nana. -I'm not listening -to either of you. -Just wait one second. Lapsang souchong, no sugar, and be quick about it. Uh, Nana, i-i don't know how to make tea. Wow. I saw this show when I was a kid. Nana, you were absolutely amazing. Please, this flattery is futile. I have no intention of bailing you out. Your pathetic shows are the reason that theater no longer has an audience. Oh, but this show is gonna... Gonna pack 'em in like it did in the good old days. They were not "good old days," Mr. moon. They were magnificent. And that theater of yours, it was a palace of wonder and magic. But, Nana, it still is. -Yeah, right. -Ow! I can recall the ushers in their velvet suits. Queues a mile long just to get a ticket. The curtain rising over that glorious stage. Music and light bringing dreams to life? Precisely. Well, it's just like you remember it. In fact, I've made it even more spectacular. No, you haven't. -Shh. Come see for yourself. Uh, a special performance just for you. What do you say, Nana? I say... You are a liar, Mr. moon. Okay, well, we're done now. Thank you, Nana. But anything's better than spending another evening playing checkers with this old fart. What? Great. It's gonna blow you away, Nana. And that is no lie. Now, listen up. Tomorrow we are going to have a full preview of the show, and our audience will be none other than miss Nana noodleman. - Nana noodleman? - Wow, Nana noodleman. She's still alive? Oh, yes, and believe me, she's got some pretty high standards. All right? So, today, we're going to have a full dress rehearsal, and I want to see you light up the stage, folks. Well, that's cool. -Meena? Miss crawly? What do you think? Wow, it's so ambitious. Yeah, are you sure about this? I promised Nana something spectacular, and this-- ha!-- It's gonna blow her away. -Oh, yes. -Two minutes, everybody. Johnny. Johnny, where are you? Johnny, answer the walkie-talkie. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, dad. I'm here. I'm here. -What's wrong? -We got the call. Shipment's coming in. -Tonight? -Not tonight. Now. Meet us on the corner of Hector street in two minutes. Stay here. We'll be back in exactly 37... Yeah, 37 minutes. Yep. - You've told me repeatedly. I can make it. Bravo, Mike. Nana is gonna love that. Oh, you're... You're too kind, Mr. moon. And I myself am loving the new suit, sir. Okay, can we see ash next, please? Ash, let's get you out here. Oh, stand back. Moody teenager coming through. Good luck, ash. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Okay, enough of that. - Cut it, cut it, cut it, cut it. - --i don't think anyone's gonna call her after that. Okay, ash, um... Hey, come on, ash. What is it? Do you... Do you not like the dress? Ow. Ow. Ash, what's wrong? Well, it sounds to me like you are way better off without that... that... That total super-jerk dinkleschplatt! Exactly. Total super-jerk dinkleschplatt. Rosita! Gunter! -You're on next. -Yeah, okay, here. There should be some gum or some candy in there somewhere. Just help yourself. Rosita, Rosita, Rosita. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Can I take your place, please? - Sure, Johnny. Go ahead. - Okay, get ready, 'cause I'm warning you... This stage is about to explode with major piggy power. I am so sorry. I have no control. Yeah! Okay, come on, you can do this. Are you okay? Oh, yes, I'm fine, thank you. - How are you? - Okay. Johnny, let's get you out here! And, you guys, you've gotta work on that routine. Take it away, Johnny! You can't just sing it. You've got to show the fire und desire. The fire went out a long time ago. What? Look, I can't even keep count of the steps. Ugh! Counting schmounting! She sings too much with her head, right? Ja, ja, see? Forget the steps and just, like, let the music take control of your body parts. My body parts are not responding, okay? It's never gonna happen. I should just be getting groceries. -Rosita, no. -Rosita, come on. -What? Rosita, please. Like, don't go. Psst! Hey! Hey! Down here. Have you seen three nasty-looking bears out there? Uh... no. Oh, great. Hey, by the way, i love your act. Seriously, the... the part where you fall flat on your face? Oh, that... That cracks me up, every time. See you around, porky. Ah, man. Johnny, uh, I know I'm asking a lot of you... Mr. moon, I'm really trying, i promise. What about your backup song? Have you practiced that? Uh, well, not yet. Well, why don't we go back and work on that one, okay? I mean, look, if you play like that - in front of Nana noodleman... Johnny? --Hey! We are set for life now, boys! What's going on? Where's Johnny? He's not here. Run! Oh, I'm dead. Okay, wait, let me see. No, mom, I have not made any friends. What do you think this is, kindergarten? If you hadn't squealed to the cops, I wouldn't be in here right now. Honey, when are you getting out? I'm only gonna be in here for a few years. Well, where'd you hide the money? Where were you? Um, well, thing is, i-i went -to get gas, and, um... -Don't lie to me! Um, I was at a rehearsal. Rehearsal? For what? I was at a singing contest. Look, dad, I'm... I'm sorry. I just don't want to be in your gang. -I want to be a singer. -Singer? Look, dad, no, it's okay, it's okay. I can get the bail money. There's a prize-- it's $100,000... How did I end up with a son like you, eh? You're nothing like me. You never were, and you never will be. I'll get you out! Dad, wait! I'll get the money! I promise! Johnny! Oh! You... you gave me a fright there. Sorry. I didn't mean to. I just... Well, I know it's late, but I could really use some extra piano lessons. Uh-huh. Mmm. That's it. That's good. You're getting it. Shoppers are reminded the store will close in 15 minutes. Thank you. The lady in aisle six... That was awesome. - All right. Mr. moon, are you sure this is legal? Uh... I don't know. All right, but if you keep asking questions, we'll never get this done. Now, hit it! A little higher. Just a little bit. There it is. Thank you. Hey! Posters up. -You! -Now, run away! Come back here, you vandals! Rosita, have you seen my car? Whoa! Rosita, what the...? What's going on? Rosita! Whoa! Kids, where's mommy? Whew. How's that, miss crawly? - Hey. Sorry. Mr. moon would like everyone to meet backstage before she arrives. Wow. You wrote that? Uh... yeah. Do you like it? Are you kidding? It's fantastic. You've gotta sing that today. Mike, you're on first. - Sure. Uh, just a second here. Honey, I'm busy. What? I can't hear you. Rosita and gunter, you're on after Mike. You got it, boss. Rosita! Super cool! You've, like, totally come back. Okay, Johnny, you follow them... What? Oh, oh, yeah, yeah, I'm ready. -Yeah, yeah, yeah. -Ash, you're... After Johnny. I got it. And, meena, last chance, kid. You want to... you want to join these guys out there today? I-i would. I-i just get so scared. Sure, you do. All right, but-but... You know how to get over that, right? Uh, no. You just start singing. Do what you love, then you'll be great 'cause you won't be afraid anymore because you'll actually be doing it, right? - Uh... Look, do you love to sing? I mean, do you really love it? Of course I do. Then you face this head-on, meena. Because, like my dad always said, "don't let fear stop you from doing the thing you love." Uh... Okay, I'll do it. - Great. - Mr. moon! She's here. Nana...! Oh! Do not even think of embracing me. You got it. Eddie, please show your Nana to the royal box. Oh, for heaven sakes, I'm perfectly capable of walking. You nervous? Are you kidding? I'm absolutely terrified. Boss. That's his car, isn't it? Right there. Pull over. Lapsang souchong, courtesy of Mr. moo... moo... Wonderful. H-honey, honey, the show is starting, all right? I-i can't talk now. I gotta go. Of course I love you. You think I'd buy you diamond earrings if I didn't... --Where is my money? Okay, okay, listen, listen, i just, uh... I just maybe kind of, uh, spent it all. You know? No, no, no, please, please, wait! I'll give you the money. I'll-I'll get you... I'll get you $100,000! - Where are you going to get that kind of money? Moon! Okay? Moon's got my money. Who is this "moon"? All creatures great and small, welcome to the moon theater. I am your host, buster moon, and... Okay. Behold! The very first stage lit entirely by... Squid power. Yeah! Beautiful work, guys. Now just follow me on the beat. And as you can see, this is no ordinary theater. This is a palace of wonder and magic. He's done it! He's really done it, Nana! Oh, goodness. Now welcome our first contestant. Whoa. Which one of you is moon? Hey, hey, hey, you can't just barge in here. You know this guy? -Mike? -Right. Mike here says you got his money and it's in that box. No, no, no, no, no, just hold on a moment here. That's prize money, and it's not Mike's unless he wins it fair and... -Give him the money! -Okay, okay. Hey, hey, hey, hey, take it. The whole chest. It's yours, okay? All right here. Open it. Open it? I-i... no. Me? Open it! Okay, no, i-i... I just don't... I don't have the keys, so maybe you can come back later? - Get out of the way! No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. - Wait! Hey, hey, there you go. Big guy with a bat. Who needs keys, right? All right, well, let... Let's get this thing squared up now. What the...? That's it? That's all there is? He lied. -Moon lied to us all. -Well, wait a second. -I can explain. Okay? -He's your problem, not me. This is just a prop. So, where's the $100,000? - Hmm? - You're kidding. What's the big idea? What a huge waste of everyone's... This... this was just... Buster, look out! I'm stuck! Buster, it's falling! Let go! Whoa, whoa! Hey! Okay, okay, okay, steady, girl. Steady... No, no, no, no...! Is everyone okay? Nana! I-i-I'm so sorry. I-i just... No, no, no, no, no, don't... Don't go! Has anyone seen my glass eye? Oh, it-it... It's right here, miss crawly. I've got it. Look out! No. Oh, dad. I'm so sorry. --He must be dead. --Oh, my gosh. Mommy's here! I'm standing at the scene right now, Judy, and I can tell you it is a miracle anyone survived this unbelievable disaster. Um, yeah, buster moon certainly brought down the house once and for all today. And, although Mr. moon has not been available for questions, unconfirmed reports suggest - he was responsible for building a water tank that exploded and flooded the building. I've been told the 250 squid who had been part of moon's display - are, in fact, employees... -Eddie? -...Of three-star restaurant les calmars... - There's someone at the door. ...and that none of them were harmed - during the incident. Whether they will be returning to their usual work is not yet... Oh, no. Mr. moon? Come on, moon, you can't just hide out in your buddy's pool house. Yeah, we just want to make sure you're all right, that's all. -Hey, Mr. moon. -You okay? Guys, look, i-i-I'm sorry about what happened, and-and the prize money and... Oh, it's okay. No, none of this is okay. At least we're all in one piece. Yeah, and you know what, i bet we can find some other place to put the show on. - Right? - Yeah. The show? Guys, I'm done. -Are you serious? -What do you mean, done? Come on! Didn't you see this? Huh? Look, it says I'm a danger to society. - What? - Gah! "A deluded, washed-up charlatan who never had a hit in his career." Oh, come on, you don't believe all that. Yeah, I do. Listen, you're not the only one who lost something here. - We all did. - Ja! I mean, I lost any chance of ever speaking to my dad again over this show. - Sorry. - Oh, Mr. moon, don't... Ah, forget about it. What is this? I don't understand. Come on, let's get out of here. Mr. moon? Meena, please. Um, i-i baked a cake for you 'cause, well, i know you're sad right now and probably afraid to try again and... Yeah, I am afraid. I'm afraid that this... This, me, right now, this is who I am. This is... This is my lot for life-- that I'm not the guy that my dad wanted me to be, not by a million miles. But-but you told me... What? What? What did I say? Well, you know, "don't let fear stop you from doing the thing you love." Ah, come... th-that's just a bunch of stupid, corny... -No, it's not. -What, y-you really believe that you're gonna be a singer? Well, yeah, maybe. Well, then you're just as big a fool as I am! Look, kid. You and me, we-we're both afraid for good reason. Right, 'cause deep down we know... ...we just don't have what it takes. -Hey, buster. -Hey, Eddie. Man, where'd you go? Are you okay? Listen, could you meet me at the corner of dinsdale and lemington? Now? Yeah, please. And could you, uh... Could you bring me a spare speedo? Speedo? Hey, miss crawly. Oh, hello, Eddie. Hey. Did you bring the speedo? -The... oh, yeah, uh, here. -Great. - You're a real pal, Eddie. Oh, our first customer. Miss crawly, fill the bucket. Be right with you, sir. --Wait. What are you doing? The only other job I know. Just glad my dad isn't here to see this. Miss crawly, if you would... Thanks. Well, gotta go to work. Uh... I'll see you around, Eddie. Come on! I ain't got all day! Yeah, yeah... - Ah, forget it. Too slow, dude. Whoa! One moment, please, sir. Well, you know the good thing about hitting rock bottom? There's only one way left to go, and that's up. Come on. You wash, I'll dry. Thank you, miss crawly. Buster, where are you going? I, uh... Do you think you could sing like that in front of a real audience? I don't know, but I want to try. Good. 'Cause I want to see it. We are? Seriously? --Oh, my gosh! Okay. Okay, yes, I'll be right over. Hello? Oh, hello, Mr. moon. Some say he's the worst showman this city's ever seen. Some say he's a walking disaster. A loose Cannon. Well, tomorrow night, the name buster moon will go down -in entertainment history once and for all, - as he and this bunch of bumbling amateurs attempt to restage the show that brought down his theater. Ah, don't you worry, Mike. All is forgiven. Just glad you're back in one piece. Oh, yeah, you're too kind, Mr. moon. And, uh, the... the prize money? It's, uh... I mean, it's... It's real this time, right? There is no prize money, 'cause there's no competition. Tonight you're singing for yourselves. Two minutes, everybody. Final checks. Singing for ourselves? Unbelievable. What-what-what is...? Who's he...? This is crazy. I'm out of here. - Hello! - uh, we-we're... We're putting on a show here. -Hey! -Come on. -You all should come and see it. You! Come on! Come on, fella! It's going to be really good. Hey. How's our new stagehand getting on? -He's learning fast. -All set and standing by! I love this headset! The audience are in their seats, Mr. moon. Great! --Hmm. - Caspar! - That's all? Get your pants back on, young man! Please, you guys, please. Please sit down! Hey, put your shoes back on right now! Zoe, I saw that! Stop it! And, Leo, that is disgusting! Well, John, I've covered many disasters for this network, but this is sure to... Oh, oh, they're about to start. Okay, guys, listen up. Look, I gotta tell you, um, there's not much of an audience out there tonight. But you know what? It doesn't matter. It really doesn't. 'Cause tonight is our night. And whatever happens, i just want you all to know how proud I am to be a part of this with you. Good luck, Mr. moon. Good luck, every... whoa! Whoop. Uh... sorry. Just jumped the cue there. Don't worry. I... i-I'm gonna get the hang of this. Here we go. All creatures great and small, - welcome to... Oh, hello there. Great. Welcome to our newly refurbished, open-air theater. Yes, I am your host, buster moon... -You ready, big guy? -Ja! I'm, like, totally ready. All right. Let's do this. Gunter and Rosita! Aren't they great? What, are you kidding me? It's like watching jell-o dancing around. Like you could do any better, pip-squeak. All right, all right, all right. Hey! You want to see something great? I'll show you great. Yeah, mommy! -Gunter and Rosita! Kids, no. Back to your seats. -The show's still... -Okay, okay. Aah! - Norman! All right! Piggy power! - That was great! Well, it seems I'm not the only one who actually enjoyed that. Crowds are beginning to arrive at the scene. --Help! I'm so sorry, Mr. moon. Johnny, you're on next. What is that? Turn it down, will you? Oi, didn't you hear me? I said turn it... -What the...? -Hey, hey! What about that, huh? Give it up for Johnny, folks. --Yeah! Johnny! Johnny! What's with the face? You were great. They loved you. Yeah, thanks, Rosita. All right. Welcome to all you newcomers. You are just in time to meet a teenager who was recently dumped by her boyfriend. - Aw... - I know, right? But she's gonna chase those blues away with a song of her very own. Allow me to introduce the singing sensation, ash. --Judith? You are all trespassing on private property. -What?! -And you will leave right now. I didn't... no, no, no, no, no, no, Judith... All of you. Ugh. Seriously? She's not even that good. Yeah, yeah, totally. Uh, you guys okay? Ash! Ash! Ash! Ash! Ash! Ash! Ash! What about that? We just witnessed the birth of a genuine rock star! Moon, you... You've got some stuck here. Ow! He may be tiny, but there is no denying his enormous talent. Would you please welcome to the stage Mike. What are you doing back here? Relax, sweetheart. Just came back to show you bozos how it's really done. Now, watch this. That is Mike! I'm so proud of you. Uh-oh. You gotta be kidding me. Negative. I've lost sight of the suspect and am terminating pursuit. That pip-squeak really was great. Thank you. Thank you so much. Oh, please. You're too kind, really. Look at me. I'm turning red. Stop. I can't take it. Keep... keep it coming. Well, I better get back. They'll be wondering what happened to me. You'll visit me, though, yeah? Yeah, course I will. See you, son. We have one final act for you tonight. Would you please welcome to the stage for her first ever live appearance... Meena. Meena? Is she coming out? Meena, what's wrong? Are you okay? Uh, I can't move. I'm... I'm terrified. Give me your hand, kid. Okay, deep breaths. Deep breaths. And remember what I told you. You will not feel afraid anymore if you just start singing. - Meena! Meena! I can do it... okay. Oh! Oh, I'm so sorry. Um... Uh, okay. Uh... uh... Sing. Okay. Whoo-hoo! Guys, guys, wait. We can talk this over, right? We're all reasonable individuals here. Get in! Quick! Oh, thank you, sweetheart. Whew! That was close. Yeah. Come on! - Meena! You did it! - That's my granddaughter! - She did it! Go, go! Oh, dad, i wish you could see this. Everybody ready? All creatures great and small, welcome to the new moon theater. |
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