Smartass (2017)

2
Let me get two bindles.
And don't fuck with me,
I want the homie price.
You hear me?
I hear you
on the homie price,
but you ain't no homie,
nigger.
Ah, I see.
Look what you just did.
Say nigger now.
Awe, look. You got something
on your shoe, homie.
Bitch.
You good, baby?
Hugo.
Hey, buddy.
How's the trap shot business?
These guys are total suckers.
Ya know, I'm still
waiting on my cut
from that custom van work I did.
It's rough out here,
I got overhead.
You're such a shyster.
Hey...
You cool?
Yeah, you?
Yeah.
Hugo, come on, man.
You think you'll get
to ride in a lowrider?
Maybe.
That'd be cool.
Yeah.
Hey, get off my property!
Ninja skills, try me, bitch.
Give that back.
Nope, it's mine now.
What are you
gonna do with that?
Keep it like a prize.
Otto, can you help me?
I almost got this, man.
Is that a condom machine?
That's disgusting.
Seriously, dude, if you
don't shut the fuck up,
I'm gonna rip your
fuckin' throat out.
Hey, thought smack was
supposed to make you like,
sleepy and nice,
not a douchetard.
You have room to talk.
You're like the
biggest asshole alive.
Me?
Yes, you!
Fuck yes.
Motivational speaker.
I might kill you.
Awe, then
you'd be so lonely.
No, I wouldn't.
What the fuck you
lookin' at, motherfucker?
You want some of me, bitch?
Alright, motherfucker.
I should be a gang.
Just you, huh?
Mm-hmm.
One person can't be a gang.
Hey, no crushing
my dreams, okay?
Okay, Fred, you're a gang.
What would your name be?
That's a good question.
I don't know yet.
Lobo.
Look, Efe, I can explain.
All you can do now is listen.
We have no place
for you here, ese.
Your coming here
disrupts my peace
and I, Lobo,
I'm a peaceful man.
Wait, wait, Poco Efe,
please, just wait.
Begging ain't gonna
do you no good, homie.
$50,000, just
$50,000 by tomorrow.
Come on, Efe,
a little disruption
and my protection is
worth at least $50,000.
Trust me, I'm good for it, Efe.
Shit'll be picked up
at my brother's place
in Morieto tonight.
Just needs to be trailed.
I'll give you 24 hours
for your 50,000.
And I'll take one of those.
Come on, Efe.
Do me a favor.
You want a favor?
You got 24 hours, ese.
Thanks.
My money, man, don't
be trippin', homie!
Back the fuck up.
What's going on, Z?
Uh, there's like
a disagreement
and a lot of racial slurs.
The fuck is this?
Nothing, gosh.
So we should probably,
ya know, get outta here
- 'cause this...
- Yo, you trippin', homie!
Yo, you need to
back up off me.
Whoa, whoa, whoa,
Freddie, Freddie.
Say somethin'!
I'm so over this shit.
Going back to Vermont.
Say somethin', homie!
- Say somethin'!
- What?
Chuchu, please
they're gonna kill me
and I need your help, baby.
Babe!
I'm here.
Lobo, I miss you.
Well, you're never
gonna fuckin' see me again
if you don't fuckin' help me!
Why are you yelling?
'Cause he bit
my fuckin' finger off
and he's gonna let
these niggas kill me
if I don't get him this money.
Lobo.
Fuck, baby, what?
Nobody's gonna kill you.
Nobody's gonna kill you.
Just fuckin' help me.
Jose should already be there,
just make sure
they stay with the
fuckin' problem.
Okay.
Fucking fine, fuck.
I've only got 24 hours.
- Chuchu!
- Come on, kill me, puta!
Kill me, kill me, come on, hey!
Puto!
Oh, almost!
I'll shine your shit
right up your ass!
Give it to me.
Oh, you bitch!
Puto, fuck you!
Fuck, shit.
Anybody got better
shit than Paolo, huh?
Now that is what you
call a loaded question
'cause I,
you wanna hear no, but then
that's a suspect answer
because I know that
you wanna hear it.
Sit down.
What are you doing?
Alright, now can
I get the stuff?
Yes.
Yes, you can.
Alright, I'll
wait for you here.
- You're fucked up.
- You're fucked up.
I like him.
Okay, man, I'm done.
I'm done with you
fuckin' bitches.
You say that you like
my friend, Donny,
well, it's your lucky day.
Stand up, you fucking cunt.
Hey, Donny, take her,
she's yours.
Fuckin' shit.
What the fuck are
you doin' to me here?
Fuck.
Here ya go, I'll have the rest
for you tomorrow, alright?
You're a good boy, Donny.
Thanks.
I hope nothing bad happens
to you between these times.
You see, why you
gotta say it like that
'cause now I think
you want something bad
to happen to me.
No, I don't.
Yes, you do.
No.
No, I don't.
Yes, you do, man.
Way to fuckin' creep
me out, alright?
I'm leavin'.
Hey, hey, hey,
take Chuchu with you.
It's my gift.
No, no, no, no, she's
like fuckin' half dead.
I don't want her, alright,
you keep her, please.
Paolo does not take no
for an answer and, um,
I don't want her anymore.
So, no Chuchu, no loan.
Ah, fuck.
Alright, fuck, fine,
I'll take her.
Come on.
Hey, Donny!
Yeah?
- I like you.
- What the fuck does that mean?
You like Venice too, look
how she fuckin' ended up.
Correction, my friend.
I love Venice.
I only like you.
Right, yeah, of course.
Alright, come on, let's go.
Let's go.
Let's go, let's go, let's go.
Hey.
Taking his bag, alright?
It's got the papers in it.
Hey, I'll go with.
Z, tell Otto I got
kidnapped by aliens.
Okay.
Hey.
What?
What were you gonna say?
Uh, just that,
I'm glad that you're
traveling with.
Well, it was either
you or Air Force One, so.
Hey.
What's up?
Come here for a minute.
Ooh, you're like a
fuckin' terrorist.
You're comin' with me.
That's exactly what
a terrorist would say.
We're going to Burger Bomb.
Oh, why didn't you just
say that in the first place?
Bye, Nick.
You have work to do.
Hey, Donny.
Hey, Otto.
She dead?
- Her, no.
- She looks dead, dude.
You can't say that
'cause she's not dead.
- Oh, she's not dead?
- No.
- Where'd you get her?
- She was a gift.
- Oh, she was a gift, huh?
- Yeah.
Think when she dies,
they're gonna, I don't know,
give you a new one?
Yeah, see, I don't
know why she said that
'cause she's not gonna die.
They got shit
goin' on by the stairs.
Yeah? Otto, what's
going on back there?
Yeah, Donny, she's
like grabbing onto her
fuckin' head, dude.
Let her go.
Let her go.
Walk, dude.
Let her go.
Take her up,
man, get her inside.
What the fuck?
Sorry.
It's cool, brother.
See you around.
Let's go.
Yeah.
Still think she's gonna die.
She probably will.
Hey.
Yo.
Nick, meet Chuchu.
Chuchu, you say hello to Nick.
Nice, real sweetheart.
Now, Nick, you
gotta promise me.
You gotta be careful
with this stuff
because it's gonna
make your face drip off
in like five minutes.
Not that that's a bad
thing, by the way.
That clean, huh?
Yeah, the guy's a
fuckin' psycho, dude. You know?
You know, he made me take her
if I wanted to buy his shit.
Nick, the dude fuckin'
gave me a human being.
Obviously I did because the
dude's fuckin' scary, ya know?
So, Donny, I have a favor.
I didn't come up
with all the money.
Uh, shit.
That kinda makes me a
little nervous because
the dude was sketchin' out
about nothing bad happening,
now you're telling me you
only got half his money, Nick.
Say yes, Donny.
You know I'm good for it.
If you're not cut
out for this shit,
go get a job at a carwash.
Will you just take a
minute and just listen
to the words that are comin'
outta your mouth, please?
Look, my guy is a
trust fund surfer.
It'll be fine, just
meet me at the beach
around 10 and I'll
have the rest of it.
Yeah, right, meet at the
beach at 10 because
nothing bad ever happens
at the beach, right?
Donny!
You know, we're up.
I'm fine, right?
I'm fine, fuck, I'll do it,
but only fuckin'
because it's you.
Come on, buddy, you
gotta eat something.
Can't just survive off
of donuts and drugs.
I drink.
Z, Yoohoo is barely
considered a drink.
You're crazy.
Yoohoo is wizard milk.
It's wizard milk.
I'm getting you a burger
and you're gonna eat it, okay?
Hey!
You're gonna eat it
'cause I love you.
I don't want you
to hook up with Nick.
Ugh, what do you care?
It's just a bad idea.
I care.
I mean, he's cute and I'm
pretty sure he likes me.
Guys like him never like me.
They always like the
douchey California counter
girls of the world.
Not true.
Nope, it's definitely true.
What the fuck, Z?
Excuse me, do
you have a warrant?
Zandar Phillips
gave us permission
to search the vehicle, miss.
Zandar, where the
hell are you from?
- He's from Connecticut.
- I know.
Mommy and Daddy Phillips
are gonna be pissed.
Whose is this?
It's mine, actually.
And why do you have it?
It was a prize.
- Prize?
- Mm-hmm.
How old are you?
- No, you're not.
- Yeah, I am.
- No, you're not.
- Yes, I am.
I'm arresting you.
Oh, couldn't resist, could ya?
Freddie.
I'll meet you at the
beach tomorrow, Otto.
And Zandar of Connecticut,
when I get back,
ice cream sundaes for days.
Otto, what are we gonna do?
Don't worry, we're gonna
be best friends in like
two minutes.
Shut up and get in.
See? He likes me already.
What are we gonna tell Nick?
You don't tell him anything.
I'll figure out what to say.
Wait a minute, really?
Really?
Bitch just pops a bunch
of fuckin' pills.
I gotta deal with the bullshit.
- Where the fuck do you live?
- Where the fuck do you live?
Where the fuck do I live?
Yes, really.
Well, you know what?
Fuck this.
If I can't be asking
fuckin' questions,
I see what's going on here.
This is
a collect call from...
Freddie.
I accept.
Freddie?
Hey, Mom.
You're three days late.
Sorry, I thought weekly
was more of a range.
Where are you?
California.
Where exactly?
Um...
I don't know.
How's Hugo?
Sleeping.
It's late.
Shit, I'm sorry.
I forgot the time difference.
You know, Courtney had
her sweet 16 last weekend.
Her mother called to see
if you wanted to come.
I told her you were
with your father.
Come on, you're lying.
Courtney's mom would never call.
She hates me.
What the fuck is a sweet 16?
Is that like a fancy name
for a birthday party?
It's an important milestone.
Why?
Is 15 like a year we
celebrate the surviving of?
- Freddie.
- Mother.
Could you just please
wake up Hugo, please?
No.
You want your family,
you come home.
Gosh, for the
millionth time, I told you,
I'm not coming home.
Why are you doing this to me?
Jesus Christ, Freddie, I'm
really worried about you.
I miss you.
Stop worrying, okay?
I'm fine.
Will you just tell
Hugo that I miss him?
I gotta go.
Bye.
Freddie.
Freddie?
Stop.
Okay, stop.
Crying, okay.
Ooh. Okay.
Okay. Okay.
You're lying. There's no way
that she's with Dave.
That guy is a total scumbag.
She didn't go
because of him, man.
Dave's ridin' with Dready Jeff.
You know what kinda
player that cat is.
I still think
you're full of shit.
She said she'd meet us at
the beach tomorrow, relax.
What'd he do?
He, um...
Sorry, man.
Whatever.
Get Freddie's bag.
Let's go, debutante.
Ooh, where we going, a ball?
I got your ball.
This amuses you?
No, but if you're
gonna make the effort.
This is a mugshot.
I know.
But my mom always says-
Nobody in here
gives a damn what your
white ass mama says.
Lost your doggone mind.
Turn.
Oh, yeah, who
let the wetbacks out?
Hey!
Step it back, would you?
Oh, come on.
Why am I alone?
'Cause I know it
will annoy you more.
Come on.
What if you forget to feed me?
It happens at the
zoo all the time.
Oh, I wouldn't
worry about that.
Besides, you could afford
to lose a few pounds.
Damn.
Hey, listen, I just,
I was wondering,
are you guys taking bets on
who's gonna win over there?
Because I want in.
My money's on the chicas.
Why is that, cracker baby?
I don't know,
they work harder,
not always late.
You know what happens
if I put you in that cell?
Hmm, we toast marshmallows
and sing a multiracial
version of Kumbaya?
Child, you got your
little privileged ass
arrested in the wrong county
at the wrong time.
Right, there is a good place
to get arrested.
I forgot.
You don't even know, do you?
Why don't you tell me?
Ooh, it'll be like story time.
Hmm, I'm gonna do
better than tell you.
Oh, come on, don't leave now.
Keep playin'.
Hey.
What are you doing?
Just trying to realign
all the blood in my body
so it floods to my brain
so I'm not so bored.
You?
Releasing you, you're OR'd.
What does that mean?
Releasing you on
your own recognizance,
but you have to come back for
your court date, of course.
Of course, yeah.
Why you smiling like that?
Happy for you is all.
Now get the hell outta here
before I change my mind.
Yes, ma'am.
You gotta take her back, man.
No, I will not take a gift back.
- Bad luck.
- Look, I'll leave her here.
It'll be like I
never had her, right?
How bout this,
I can help wake her up
and then
you can discuss it with her.
Okay?
Venice, bring
something for Chuchu.
It's all here?
Where the fuck did she
even come from anyway?
She was my brother's girl,
but you don't have
to worry about that.
The fucker is in the
pen for shooting
some nigger's head off.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God, you fuckin'
psycho voodoo bastard.
You're tryin' to
fuckin' kill me!
It's like you fuckin'
sit there in your chair
with your fuckin' cowboy hat on.
You look me in the
eyes and you say,
"I like you, Donny,"
'cause I remember it,
and then you send me
with a lifeless chick
and she's a fuckin'
fruit basket.
Donny.
- Shut the fuck up.
- You shut up.
Why don't you both
shut the fuck up?
Relax, my brother's the
least of your worries.
He's as good as dead.
Least of my concerns?
Would you listen to yourself?
You're talkin' about your
own fuckin' brother here.
No, no, no, no, absolutely not.
No fuckin' way.
My brother was a no good thug.
We reap what we sow.
The fuck does that mean?
Now like I deserve this?
What did I do?
Donny, come here.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
No, don't start this shit again.
Maybe this is a good thing.
When's the last time
you got laid?
Are you fuckin' serious?
Yes.
Paolo, you gotta
help me, alright?
Oh, I did, she can walk now.
Come on, Venice, please?
Oh, fuck.
Why the fuck is this
happening to me?
Oh.
Have fun, eh?
Be gentle.
Hey.
Where's the white girl?
I let her out.
Neesy, she's 15
fuckin' years old.
What did you think you
were gonna do with her?
Send her home?
It's 11:00 at night.
That kid needed a lesson.
Maybe but she
don't deserve to die.
That's not my problem.
You were at lunch.
Hey, girl.
What you doin' out
past your bedtime?
Me?
Yeah, you, baby.
I lost my puppy.
I'll be your puppy, baby.
You guys got a cigarette?
We got somethin' better.
Girl, we got the gold.
Crack is so pretty,
don't ya think?
You know you want it, baby.
No, I want a cigarette.
What if I let you
have this one free?
Then I'd say nothing
in life is free.
But I don't know, maybe
we can make a deal.
How much change you both
got in your pockets?
Come on, playas, play with me.
Okay, if I smoke your freebie,
you give me all your change.
- What do we get?
- Think about it.
Why's the first one always free?
It's the hook.
Yep, so,
if I smoke one hit and I
don't want another one,
you pay me.
Otherwise, I'm hooked.
Alright, sugarplum.
So, where you from, Ma?
I'm a child star.
My parents went crazy
and blew all my money.
No way.
Who are you?
Bro, I'm just playing.
I'm not a child star.
Ready?
Like it, baby?
What the fuck did
we tell you about
peddling your shit on
this side of town, huh?
Hey yo, let go of
my brother, beaner!
Fuck you call me?
Shit, he just
called you a beaner!
- Shut up, crack whore.
- Excuse me, sir.
I am not a crack whore.
Yeah, I just smoked
a hit of crack,
but that doesn't...
Bitch, shut the fuck up.
Okay.
That's fucking smart.
Yeah, I'm leaving.
Oh, fuck, oh, shit.
What we got going on
over here, huh?
Oh, shit!
Look like it's our side
of the town now, son.
I wanna shoot your
motherfuckin' ass right now,
you fuckin' roach.
I been itchin' to shoot me a
motherfuckin' cholo tonight.
Yeah, look, bap, bap, bap!
What are you doing?
Get outta here.
But, Antoine, this my spot.
Okay, I'm stuttering
around here.
I'm not gettin' my point across?
Get the fuck outta here.
You think this
is a fuckin' game?
Get the fuck outta here.
Back to this motherfuckin'
burrito eatin'
motherfucker right here.
Oh, so you nervous, huh?
Oh, my God.
What was that?
Takin' our territory
back from the Mexo.
Is that wise?
Hell yeah, it's our spot now.
Wouldn't it just be more
reasonable to, ya know,
pick a spot they don't want?
Oh, yeah he, oh, that's
the bitch right there.
No, no, no, that's the
bigger bitch right here.
Put it right here.
Right here.
My boy over there, Antoine,
it was one of his
boys that got shot.
Now we fixin' to kill
all them roaches.
If I had my gun,
they would be shot.
Two Mexicans shot right now,
cholo on the ground
bleedin' right now.
The biggest problem is,
nigga who shot 'em all's
threatening the pen
and shit, cock out.
But it'll be over soon.
I heard that nigga just got
moved back to general pop.
Nah, I heard he's
buying himself protection.
I'm done.
Deal's a deal, man.
Nah, nah, no way.
Nobody likes a punk.
Jesus.
Fine.
Come on.
Thank you.
Hey, white girl.
You pretty cool.
How 'bout I let you
come home and do me?
Enticing,
but I've got plans, sorry.
Pshhh.
Yeah, Donny, come on!
Oh, you're such a good boy,
Donny. You're such a good boy.
Oh, my God.
No more.
Holy fuck, holy shit.
No, no, no.
You gotta stop right now.
Good boy.
Alright, see ya.
So, guy is sick
and Rod wants us to come out
there tomorrow afternoon.
Shit, alright.
I'm gonna go see if
Freddie's here yet.
She's not gonna be.
They mentioned
stopping in Venice.
You should just
fuckin' chill, man.
That's alright, I'm
a little amped anyways.
That shit gets into your system
no matter how careful you are.
Ooh, can I get some of
that shit in my system?
- Yes, you may, baby.
- Ooh.
Hey, hey.
Don't eat it all, okay?
Okay, alright.
Pack of cigarettes, please.
$1.65.
How's 1.55 sound?
Like you're short 10 cents.
But it's only 10 cents.
- Don't care.
- Come on, man.
Want me to recite
state capitals?
I want you to
have 10 more cents.
Okay look, kind
gas attendant man.
I have had a very long day.
I was locked up for four hours
in a racial wrestling ring
and I was just
forced to smoke crack
in order to obtain
this perfect amount of
change that you are calling
10 cents short.
'Cause it is.
Oh, my God.
This is what
we're gonna do, okay?
I'm go...
Thanks, man.
- Have a great day.
- Mm-hmm.
Hey, you guys have a light?
No smoking.
Come on, please.
No, child, no smoking.
You ain't gon' blow us up
out here tonight, uh-uh.
Fine.
Do you know how long it'd take
to walk to San Diego from here?
Child, I'm from LA.
I ain't walked nowhere
since I was 10 years old.
Shit, I gotta get there.
Suggestions?
Girl, use them thumbs.
Or that pretty little mouth.
Suck a dick
all the way to Mexico.
Do you guys have pimps
or a pimp?
Why you ask?
Bored fascination.
I'll tell ya for two smokes.
- Really?
- Uh-huh.
Okay.
He dead.
Mm-hmm, I killed
that motherfucker.
You're lyin', really?
You's a dumbass white girl.
She just being mean.
It's true though.
I killed him. He was interfering
with my money makin'.
That seems kinda
counterintuitive for a pimp.
Yeah, he was hatin'
on our cholo niggas,
so he had to go.
Now let me give you
a tip, little girl.
Ain't nobody out here this late
except for murderers,
hustlers, hookers,
and you.
So watch your back.
That's a pretty weak tip.
Yeah, well, here's one.
Start learning how to suck dick.
You'll be fine.
Just stay away from them gangs.
'Cause spics be
killin' niggas.
Niggas be killin' spics.
And as long as you
ain't one of them,
you be alright.
What about you guys?
Ain't nobody kills
good pussy, honey.
Yeah, baby.
Nobody kills good pussy, baby.
Here, take it.
There, did my good deed
for the day.
Bye, ladies.
Motherfucker!
Motherfucker!
Niggers!
Fucking cunt.
Chuchu. Fuckin' kill her.
Motherfucker, you!
This is all her fault, Venice!
No, Paolo, it's Lobo's fault.
It's your brother's fault.
Yeah, exactly, why
isn't he dead yet?
How should I know?
You fuckin' bitch, I'm
gonna fuckin' shoot you.
Fuck, shit.
Alright, I'm gonna take off.
If you wanna go, you
gotta take Chuchu with you.
No, no, no, no.
I really don't think I can.
You don't wanna take her,
no problem. I'll kill her.
Alright, alright,
I'll take her, alright?
You know, when I'm done
with all this shit,
I'm gonna get a job
at a fuckin' carwash.
Nine to five, that's
what I'm gonna do.
No, you take Chuchu, you
get the rest of the money,
you don't get robbed,
you don't get kidnapped,
you don't get killed
and this'll all be over soon.
Alright, and I definitely
have to take her?
Yes!
Oh, fuck, fuck,
fuck, fuck, fuck.
You gonna ask me
if I want ice cream?
Why are you giving me money?
I like to take care of
the kids on the street.
You have a nice one, mister.
- Hey, guys.
- Hey!
So you didn't get shot,
that's really great
for, ya know, you.
But I assume not for the
other guys, you know?
Oh, let me see, let me see.
Oh, it's okay.
That's 100% white girl
right there.
Yeah.
On point.
Ooh. Ooh. Ooh.
Helen Keller.
Helen Keller, right?
Yes, perfect, you are perfect.
No, I'm pretty sure I
can see, hear and talk.
No, no, no, no,
no, I get that.
I get that, see,
we got a game that
we like to play.
Right?
See, I'm gonna fuck you
until you go blind.
Then my man Beef here,
he gonna fuck you
until you go deaf.
Then I'm gonna come back around
and I'm gonna fuck you
until you go mute.
You see?
Okay.
That's seriously mortifying.
Super clever though,
that's real clever.
See we got a little
mouthy little smartass,
little...
oh, shit!
Yeah, I like her mouth.
I like her mouth.
No, guys, that
was a compliment.
Total compliment.
Isn't there a war
you should be tending to?
Bitch, don't be
talkin' to me about
what I should be doin'!
I should be fuckin'
you right now.
Truce, man?
You want my cigarettes?
No, I don't want no
fuckin' cigarettes.
Oh, ain't nobody
to save your ass.
Man, who the fuck?
Dad, oh, my God, it's my Dad!
Dad, oh, hey.
Shit, one second.
You know, guys, this
has been real great.
Ya know, he's a cop,
I was just rebelling.
You've seen it a million times.
Hey, you know what though?
You guys have a
really sick ride.
Next time we hang out, I
wanna ride in it, you know?
I got something
for you to ride on!
Bye guys!
Helen! Helen!
Ooh.
So, where you going?
San Diego.
That ain't her
daddy, nigga, that's a trick.
She 'bout to suck
his dick right now.
Come on, man.
That was my white girl, man.
Are you okay?
Yeah, I'm fine.
Just don't think you're gonna
get anything from me, okay?
I don't.
Well, excuse me if
I find that unlikely.
I mean, I don't fault
you for it, it's just,
you're not gonna get it
from me, deal?
I hate clowns.
What?
They don't scare me,
I just don't like them.
I set one on fire at my
friend's birthday party once.
Why would you do that?
Are you a serial killer?
No, I'm a father.
And John Wayne Gacy
was a fucking clown.
That doesn't mean he
didn't kill little boys.
I'm not a killer.
Just listen, if
you are a murderer,
that's your business entirely.
Just please don't
murder me, okay?
I'm way too fuckin' tired
to die right now.
I promise.
Uh...
This is far as I can take you.
Thanks for not killing me.
Um, uh...
Z?
Dude.
I can see you.
I'm a Cherokee!
Fuck! Go around!
Chill the fuck out, Z.
Dude, I need you to cool off.
Z, Z, it's Nick, okay?
Please, please shut the fuck up.
You can't have me, man.
You can't have me.
I'm like free.
I'm like a free man.
We don't want you.
We need you to shut the fuck up.
Hey, that's pretty good.
Hey, Herman, look at this.
What?
Cute.
That
means he likes it.
Right.
And who are you?
The ghost of Christmas past?
Herman.
I'm just a drunk.
He's not just a drunk.
Tell her.
I write a little, that's all.
Really?
I'm Freddie, nice to meet you.
I'm a runaway
and according to two
gang members, a smartass.
Runaway, huh?
Someone beat you?
No.
Touch you?
Nope.
Orphan?
No, sir.
One who runs away often does so
to get away from something.
Yes, often.
But not always.
Do you know what
impetuous means?
No.
It means a person
who acts in a rash
and inconsiderate manner,
often the mark of
the very young.
I think you just insulted me
with a thesaurus.
Well, as much as I
love to be analyzed.
Please.
Please stay.
Keep an old man company while he
eats one of his last meals.
Fine.
But it's your turn now.
What?
What's your mark
of the, ya know,
very, very, very old?
And make it good or
this dance is over.
The mark of the very old is
always the same, young lady.
Reflection hampered by
immeasurable regret.
What's your biggest regret?
That it took me
until now to realize
what I could've
learned at your age
if I wasn't such an impetuous,
horrid little know-it-all.
Wow, you
just might be the worst
new friend maker on the planet.
Don't confuse
tactics with character.
There's only
one thing for people like us.
If you say it's sweet 16's,
we're done for.
Ambition.
But once you know, you
have to live up to it
or else.
Or else?
Liver spots and
immeasurable regret?
Why run when there's
nothing to run from?
I'm not running.
Those were your
words, not mine.
It's just an expression.
Sure it is.
It was nice to
meet you, Herman.
Keep it.
What's up, two socks?
Hey.
Said you were gonna
stop using rigs.
It's better this way.
Whatever, man, see ya outside.
What the fuck man, what? What?
I think we're being followed.
What am I looking at?
Look, those two Mexican dudes
down there in that car.
What the fuck are you...
stop being paranoid, man.
No, look, it rings a bell.
What?
Z, you're being paranoid,
chill the fuck out.
Dude, it's just a blue car.
No, the two Mexican dudes
sat in it all night.
I am paranoid, but I'm
not wrong about this.
Look, I remember them.
Oh, motherfucker!
Shit. Z, help me, man.
What'd I just fucking
say about the needles?
Yeah, Freddie
wouldn't be in jail
if you weren't shooting!
- What? Z?
- Oops.
Freddie got popped from that
rig she snatched from Otto.
You fucking dick.
What happened?
You OD'd, asshole.
Go get ice.
- Whoa.
- Sorry!
Yeah, no.
Hey, I know you.
Uh, no, I don't think so.
No, no, no, I
definitely know you.
You're friends with
Dready Jeff, right?
Yeah, kinda.
Yeah, what are you doin' here?
Um, I'm headed to San Diego.
I got arrested yesterday
and I managed to make it
this far without dying.
Oh, shit.
You wanna sit down?
You wanna have a cup
of coffee or something?
- Yeah, thank you.
- Excuse me, ma'am.
Can you get my friend
a cup of coffee please?
Do you want anything else?
You want something to eat?
Food or something?
Yeah, can I get a
cheese Danish please?
Watch Movies and Series Free!
And a jelly donut
and no, that's it.
Do you mind?
Oh no, go ahead.
So ya know, I
live in San Diego.
I could give you a ride
if you want.
Seriously?
Yeah, ya know, I need
the company anyway.
That would
actually be amazing.
Great.
Not to be rude or anything but,
you kinda look like
you could use a bath.
Nah, that's just my style.
Your style.
So, what's in San Diego?
A modeling job.
Modeling?
You serious?
No.
Well, you know, you could.
You ever tried?
Yes, actually, I modeled
for a mugshot earlier.
I looked awesome too.
Cute, man.
Great, that's what
they say about gremlins.
Well ya know,
I'm totally serious
about the modeling thing.
I could help you get cleaned up.
Come on, man.
I kinda need a break from people
fucking with me right now.
Well, I'm not fucking with you.
Seriously, my girl's a stylist.
She's really cool.
I think you'd really
like her and, ya know,
honestly, ya kinda
look like fuckin' shit.
Okay, thank you.
Um...
Whatever, fine, make me over.
Just, um, I need to
get to San Diego.
Well, San Diego it is.
Wanna go?
Yeah, okay.
Is that your car?
Yep.
Can I drive?
No.
Oh, come on, man, really?
Come on!
- Donny!
- No, no, Chuchu, go.
Go back upstairs.
I got business, you go
back to bed, alright?
Yo, what'd you just call her?
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, what?
What the fuck did
you just call her?
- Fuck you!
- She didn't mean that.
What the fuck is
this cunt's name, bro?
Chuchu or something like that.
That could
totally be a fake name.
It sounds like a
fake name, right?
You got something
you wanna say to me?
Excuse me, bitch?
Can I get my keys?
Donny, fuck off!
And you, you piece of shit,
ugly, impotent fucking monkey.
- Keep talking.
- Ooh.
- No, no, bro, don't kill her.
- Shut the fuck up.
I'm gonna go sit in the car.
Go sit in the car.
That was you, wasn't it?
And your little shit fuck
boyfriend killed my friend.
Get your fuckin' hands
off of me.
I didn't do nothin'.
Lobo shot him, wasn't me.
Well, Lobo's fuckin'
dead now, isn't he?
Lobo's not dead.
You wanna hear a secret?
Teeny tiny little secret, hmm?
You want Lobo dead?
Get the money before he does.
Mission Beach,
San Diego,
three hours.
Bitch.
How's that supposed to keep me
from killing you now though?
It's not so I don't die, darky.
So you do.
You're running outta time.
What's up, man?
I'm takin' a shit, man.
- What's up?
- Yeah, Antoine.
What, man?
Antoine, guess what the
fuck's about to go down, dog?
Oh,
you saw that bitch?
Hey.
Wake up.
I'm gonna head inside,
you want anything?
Ow. Yeah. Um...
Can I get a water
and chocolate and
some type of candy,
gummy form?
Gummy, sugar.
What, I have my vices
and you have yours, okay?
I'll get you some sugar.
Mickey Anderson the third.
Holy shit.
Here ya go, kiddo.
What happened to the water?
Oh, there's water in there.
Beer's gross.
It's a good beer.
Try it, seriously.
See, there ya go, not so bad.
It's fucking gross.
Shit.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, no, no, no.
Sick, how much money is that?
I've never seen that
much money before.
Just about 300k.
- Damn, Richie Rich.
- Yeah, well, it's not mine.
I actually have to ship it off
later next week.
Still, you just
got kind of cool
even though you're
making me drink this
gross ass beer.
Yeah, well, try to enjoy it.
Be a big girl.
Let's get outta here.
- What if it doesn't work?
- Z, trust me, it'll work, okay?
Otto, get fuckin' dressed,
we gotta go, man.
Shit.
Hey, check this
fool out right here.
Yeah, oh, he got game
on this girl or what?
Hey, you, where'd that fool go?
Oh, he's right there.
Alright, fuck!
Wake up.
Wake up, slut!
What the?
Who the fuck are you?
Shut up!
Now do your job!
My job, what the fuck?
My job?
My... right, my job,
I'm so sorry.
You just, you scared me.
Well, shut up!
No, you shut up
and get down.
Let's start over.
Come on, no, no, no,
get down now, down.
Let go, down.
Good, stay.
Now what are you waiting for?
Shh!
Fucking cunt.
No, get the fuck away!
Oh, my God, thank you.
He is really fuckin' strong.
You broke my glass, huh?
I paid.
Give her back.
What?
What do you want me to do?
What do I want you to do?
Are you fuckin' serious?
He say he pay.
You paid how much?
$200.
Oh, my God.
Wow, I just got sold for $200
and you, you ugly motherfucker,
just got robbed.
You, no professional.
No shit, I'm not professional.
I'm 15 fucking years old!
Now if either of you
prefer not to go to jail
for statutory, I suggest
you get my fuckin' clothes!
I'll get you someone else.
God damn it!
Now get the fuck out of here.
Can I get dressed
first, asshole?
You know what, no, actually,
I think I'm gonna stick around.
Give me 50 bucks.
Are you outta your mind?
Maybe, but ya know what,
you got a naked, bruised
and bloodied minor
standing in the parking lot
of your shitty ass
whore hotel.
So, if you don't
give me 50 bucks,
I'm just gonna sit here and
start a game of hopscotch,
maybe knock on the
neighbors door,
see if they wanna play.
Does that sound fun?
Here's five.
Here's 20.
There, now get the fuck
outta my property!
Fuck you, man!
Go fuck yourself
and your mother!
I just got sold.
Hey, man, how's it goin'? Good?
Yeah, I'm alright.
I'm alright, I'm chill.
Got the money, Nick?
No, not yet.
Not yet, why?
Nick, you said to me,
"Donny, be here tomorrow.
I'll have the rest
of your money."
I'm here, Nick.
Where's the money?
I'll have it.
I just have to go up to El Tay.
El Tay?
What kinda trust fund surfer
lives in the
fucking canyon, man?
I didn't want
you freaking out.
Don't want me freaking out?
What, Rod?
Rod, no.
No fuckin' way, you know
how I feel about him, right?
Rod, no.
No fuckin' way.
Hey, he has a kid now.
- It's different.
- Oh, great.
Or he bought the kid.
Trust me.
Besides, we got bigger problems.
You seen two Mexican
dudes in a blue
- Thunderbird following you?
- No, why?
Because I think there
was two Mexican dudes
in a blue Thunderbird
following you
- and now they're following us.
- Fuck!
Hey, hey, we took
care of it but,
you know where they might be?
I don't know.
You think it's her?
- Chuchu?
- Yeah.
Fuck yeah, I think it's her.
She's the fuckin' voodoo curse.
Tried to kill her, I
fuckin' saved her ass.
Stupid, I'm doomed to
be with that fucked up
ginger broad and she's
fuckin' annoying, by the way.
Hey, hey, hey.
Donny, relax. Donny.
Shit she put me through
the past couple days,
you would not believe
bro, seriously.
You need to fuckin' move
away from me right now, okay?
Seriously.
- Good morning, lovers!
- Jesus.
How was your night?
Freddie, you're back.
- Z.
- Oh, my God. Oh!
- I'm gonna go tell Nick.
- Okay.
Thanks.
Think nothin' of it.
I really mean it, Freddie,
I'd have gone away, gone away.
Thank you.
It was a shitty prize anyway.
- Feed me?
- Yeah.
- Please?
- Alright.
Hey, Nick, Freddie's back.
What?
Hey, don't go anywhere.
Yeah.
What the hell are
you lookin' at?
Where the fuck are they, Z?
They were right here.
Shit, we gotta go, man.
Fuck!
Where's Donny and that chick?
They were with you,
man, what happened?
Hey, wanna bite?
- Hi.
- Hi!
Z, stay in case
they come back, okay?
No.
Otto, stay with Z.
Okay.
- Freddie, you coming?
- Mm-hmm.
We'll be back in like
an hour and a half?
- All right.
- Bye, guys.
See you.
Why the fuck did
you say that, man?
Yep.
Always left behind.
Don't complain, man.
Otto.
Hmm?
Otto.
This is real bad, man.
Fucker, is that Donny?
What the fuck is going on, dude?
Come on, help me.
Help me, fuck!
Freddie, what happened?
I got arrested.
I know that.
When'd you get out?
Last night.
Where you been?
Eating bonbons in
the back of a limo.
Come on, Nick, where do
you think I've been?
Hey.
Yeah?
Come on, talk to me.
Really?
Yeah, really.
Okay, I got arrested
and then I got out
and some really fucked up people
helped me get here
and that's it.
Nothing bad happened to you?
Like?
Freddie, come on.
I'm good, okay?
Really happy to see you.
I'm happy to see Otto and Z.
And...
I'm happy to finally relax.
I'm tired.
I'm really tired.
We don't have
the fuckin' keys.
I got this.
- Got a knife?
- Yeah.
Where'd you learn this,
Connecticut?
Nantucket.
Nick, hi.
Guy, do you remember Nick?
Nick's a friend of Daddy's
and a business associate.
Hey, Bird, this is Freddie.
She's an artist.
Nice, I'm a sculptor.
Well, looks like you did
real well with that one.
I did, but I had some help.
Rod, Nick's here!
He's feeling so
much better today.
Aren't you?
Wanna hold him?
Oh, no, not really,
that's not my thing.
Aw, you're a natural.
Nick, good to see ya, buddy.
Hey, man.
Hi, I'm Freddie.
Nice to meet you.
Freddie, I'm Rod,
nice to meet you.
You want a beer?
Yeah, sure.
Come on in.
You light it?
Yeah, yesterday.
I gotta say it
just 'cause I gotta say it.
It's good stuff, man.
This is Angel's money.
I can't have any
shit going down.
You're gonna be asking me
for more next week.
Good shit, Nick.
You know, there's not a time
in my life I've been happier.
That's awesome, Rod.
Cute kid, homie.
Do anything to
protect our babies,
now wouldn't we, huh?
Who the fuck are you?
Get your hands off
my fuckin' kid.
Hey, hey, hey, relax, man.
Just call me the
candy man, homeboy.
You just gotta stand there
and listen, stay calm, homie.
Hey, you just relax, alright?
- Oh, yeah.
- Shit.
What's up, motherfuckers?
Shoot him, ese, shoot him now!
See, all I wanted to do
is kill this dumbass.
Get your ass back in the car.
All I want to do was
kill this dumbass ho.
Stay still! And then I got to
thinkin', I said,
"Self, why don't we put Lobo
in his motherfuckin' place,
in a body bag," and then
I'm gonna kill you
like I was gonna
do anyway, right?
Shh. This my favorite part,
this my favorite part,
this is my favorite part.
We make a ton of money,
that's what we call
gettin' paid for
doing what we love.
Right, Beef?
And that's why we
takin' all the money.
Oh, we gonna take all
the motherfuckin' money.
Fucking asshole!
Fuckin' kill you!
I'll fucking kill you!
Man, shoot this bitch, Beef!
Oh!
Give me my fucking kid,
you fucking wetback scum,
before I blow your brains
all over this fuckin' place.
Oh, I can taste it.
I can taste it, hey.
Hey, you got the baby wipes?
Oh! Oh! Okay.
Can I ask a question?
Oh, shit, man,
it's Helen Keller.
Helen, oh! Oh! Oh!
See, see,
now I can fuck you now!
Can somebody please tell me
what the hell is going on?
Like seriously, how the
fuck do you guys get here?
That ain't none of
your damn business,
little white whore.
Oh, my God.
I'm not a fucking whore!
Seriously, I have been
arrested, hustled,
jerked off on and sold today,
all with less than
two hours of sleep.
So if you kill me right now,
I would probably feel
so much fuckin' better
than I do.
So will someone please
just tell me what the fuck
is going on
so if I die right now,
at least I know why?
Hey, man, shoot her, man.
It was for your protection,
it was protection.
It was about buying
protection for the wetback.
Sorry, but right?
Because one of your boys
was killed?
Beef, shoot her ass!
Man, I shot the
last one, alright?
I got brain in
my eye right now.
Oh, but that's right, isn't it?
- Fuck it.
- Hey, hey, hey.
Not happening, fat boy.
Oh, my God, please don't
fucking shoot each other.
Please, please!
Just tell me how much money
you're fighting over.
Shut up, Freddie!
No, tell me how much money!
Freddie, shut the fuck up.
If it's less than $300,000,
you all need to fuckin'
stop shushing me and hear me out
'cause I've got a story to tell.
I'm listening.
Hi, Mickey!
Oh, it's good to see you.
Ya know, I was gonna say sorry
for being late on my
first day of work,
but then I thought,
huh, I clocked in
hours ago, didn't I?
So, uh, no sorries for you.
How the hell did you
know where I lived?
Good trick knows
everything about her pimp.
But I'm not mad, so, um,
why don't you invite me in
and I'll tell you
everything that happened.
Who is it, babe?
Hi, I'm Mickey's sister.
He doesn't really talk about
our side of the family much
'cause he's embarrassed.
It's 'cause Mom's
a stripper, isn't it?
Same old dirty Daddy though.
Frank had other kids?
No, she's lying.
True.
He actually drugged me
and sold me
just this morning to a
real ugly fella for $200.
That sounds more like
the Mickey you know,
doesn't it?
So what do you want?
Oh, Mickey.
It's not me that wants it.
Boom, boom, boom.
It's them.
Oh, that was good.
Admit it, that was so good.
Oh, and they're like totally
gonna rob you right now.
Yeah.
And how did I know
where you lived?
I looked in your
glove box, asshole.
You gotta be fucking
kidding me right now.
Shut the fuck up.
Shit.
Let fucking go of me,
you piece of shit.
Oh, no, no, no, he doesn't
like to be talked to like that.
Fuck this little kid, Mickey!
Do something!
What exactly do you want me
to fucking do right now?
Something, damn it!
Stop fucking smelling me.
Oh, shit, you bitch.
You broke my fucking nose!
Handle your business, Beef.
Shoot this bitch.
Yeah, she broke it.
She broke my nose.
So, are you gonna tell us
where the money is
or do we have to find it?
You think I'm fucking
scared of you bitches?
Coming into my fuckin' house,
let's go, come on.
Let's go.
Whoa, okay!
You must be stupid or you
just wanna fuckin' die.
Get this dumb motherfucker
out my face.
Shut the hell up, man, yo,
get the stuff, man, let's go.
Ain't no beef in the house,
man, let's go, sit down!
Sit down.
Get that fucking gun
outta my face.
Mickey's getting robbed.
Mickey's getting robbed.
Mickey, Mickey, Mickey.
Isn't this fun?
I'm gonna find you and
you're gonna pay for this.
You little fucking cunt.
Oh, oh.
Little cunt?
- Really?
- Yeah.
Ya know, you should
be a nicer hostess.
Your guests might turn on you
with this attitude.
You fuckin' bitch.
- Hi, guys!
- Fuckin' bitch.
Come on, come on.
Oh, the American dream, baby.
You over here beatin' up Barbie.
Oh, man, oh, yes.
Did I do good?
Oh, you did, Helen!
Oh, you did good.
Call Efe now, let's
take care of this.
Whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa,
I can't let you
do that, homeboy.
Nah, nah, nah, we making
this call, man, alright?
And you gonna get that gun
outta my motherfuckin'
face, homeboy.
Hey, put the phone down.
Hey, shut the fuck up, man,
we makin' a deal, homie.
Look, that wasn't the
part of the fuckin' deal.
It's part of the
fuckin' deal, alright?
- No, it ain't.
- Yes, it is.
No, it wasn't!
What you gonna do, huh?
Put the phone down.
We gotta go.
Yeah, I
will take your ass out.
No, no, no, no.
Let go of me.
We're leaving now.
No, you've done
enough for today.
Stop it, Nick.
Not a game, Freddie.
Okay, fine, fucking stop.
Gosh, you can stop
manhandling me.
See what you made me do?
I had to shoot the damn phone.
Okay, I just wanted
to say goodbye.
You are fuckin' ridiculous.
I know. Um...
Thanks for not
shooting each other.
I hope you buy
lots of nice things
and like, ya know,
take each other out
for fancy meals and stuff.
Listen, I'm not
a gang obviously.
Mm-mm.
But thanks for
letting me pretend.
You welcome.
She brings something
special outta me.
It's bad business
selling little girls.
Ya know,
I hope you live through this.
But if you don't,
you only have yourself to blame.
Hit me, hit me!
Oh.
Donny, hey!
Hey.
You got my money, ese?
Yeah.
Where's Chuchu?
Uh, I lost her.
Nice work.
Where?
In the desert.
We were kinda high
and I lost her
but I'm sure she's fine though.
Okay?
Who fucking cares
if she's fine?
I fucking care, okay?
So shut the fuck up, outlaw.
- Oh, shut the fuck up?
- Yeah.
You shut the fuck up.
Ah, my little Indian whore!
Alright, I'm
gonna take off, man.
Hey, hey, hey, Donny.
Wait, come here.
No, no, no, no.
No more gifts, alright?
Please, Venice, would you
tell him no more gifts.
Paolo, I totally
lost the last one.
I can't do this again,
alright, please.
Aw.
This is you.
Take it.
Take it.
You're in your own hands now.
And now, you're in my hands.
No!
Thank you.
I'll see ya.
Rod, by the way,
I'm super sorry
about what happened.
Nah, it's all sorted.
Anyway, I kinda miss
that rush, you know?
It's good.
Did you bury her?
Hey.
Nick, it's okay.
Yeah.
Yeah, I did.
Good.
Rod, would you mind if
I made a phone call?
It's long distance,
but it won't be too long.
Sure, kid, phone's in the back.
Thank you.
Who you calling?
My brother.
Ah, okay.
I'll see ya out there.
Yeah.
The Victims.
What?
That would've
been my gang name.
Deception tactic.
You're dangerous.
Don't confuse
tactics with character.
Hello?
Hugo?
So good to hear your voice.
How are you, buddy?
I'm cool, where are you?
Southern California.
Just below LA.
Hey, is Mom there?
Um, date with Richard.
Good, okay, are you
ready for this story?
- Uh-huh.
- Okay, so last night,
I was in the hood,
and I ended up
in the middle of this
crazy ass race war.
- In Compton?
- Close.
Were people getting shot at?
No, but these two gangsters
kept threatening
- to beat me up.
- What?
Yeah, but then we all became
friends, so it was okay.
No way.
Yeah,
oh, and guess what!
What?
Lowrider mission
accomplished.
Holy crap, did
they have hydraulics?
Yeah, it was pretty wild.
I really wish that you
were with me for that part.
How's everything back home?
Fine.
And Mom?
I don't know.
I miss you both.
Miss you too.
But don't come home for us.
Okay?
Promise?
Yeah, I promise.
Alright, will you tell Mom
that I love her
and not to worry?
She raised me right.
See you soon.
I promise.
Love you, bye.
Bye.
Ooh. Okay.