Repent, oh, ye sinners!
Oh, ye children of darkness...
behold...
the New Moses.
Fight down the demon rum!
Brother...
I was once a sinner like you.
I was a hog.
I was a slave of the demon rum.
A child of hell!
Yes, sir.
But I was saved by this ribbon.
It raised me from a hog to a man.
It can do the same for you.
Raise your right hand and
take the pledge.
Brother, what do I see in
your hand?
Don't be a hog!
Cast the enemy away!
Bury demon rum in the waters of
the mighty Mississippi!
Fling it away, I say!
I swear that henceforth...
liquor shall never touch my lips.
-Me too.
-Bless you, brother.
Bless you.
Look at that. You see that? See
that picture on there?
Yeah, that's Pocahontas, the
wonderful little...
Indian woman.
You know, you all know the
story of Pocahontas.
You know? That saved John
Smith's life, you know?
Well, John Smith wanted to get
this remedy from...
Pocahontas, you know?
Course, it's just made out of pure
roots and herbs...
that she picked up on the hillside.
But she wouldn't give him this
remedy. He couldn't get it.
He had to marry her to get it.
Oh, yes, he did. He had to marry
her to get the remedy.
And that's how it got into
the Smith family.
And that's been handed down from
generation to generation...
from Smith to Smith right
on down...
and that's how it come clear
down to me.
-My great-grandmother was a Smith.
-Mine too, Doc!
I doubt it. Say, lookee here.
Lookee here, my friend. You don't
look good. Now, you are ill.
You are sick, and you
don't know it.
Well, l-I do feel kind
of bad, Doc.
I knew it.
I could just look at you- Would
you mind stepping up here?
Just get up here on the platform,
will ya?
Now, you folks know that this man
is no confederate of mine.
I never saw him before.
Now, along in the spring, just
about the time...
you should go to plowin'...
why, you feel kind of tired,
don't you?
You're right, Doc.
And you know that I'm right,
don't you?
You know what that is? That's
spring sickness,...
that's what it is.
It's spring sickness, and the only
thing that'll cure...
that is Pocahontas.
Pocahontas. You know, the main
thing about Pocahontas is...
that you can't do a tap of work...
you're not allowed to turn a hand
until the whole bottle is empty.
You mean, I can't even sharpen the
ax for the old woman to cut wood?
Why, you can't even hitch up
the mules for her.
I'll take a bottle, Doc.
Its 50 cents a bottle. l-I haven't
got change for...
that dollar here.
You don't mind just takin' another
bottle, do you?
Because, you know, you're gonna
be tired during the summer...
and that'll carry you over
till I get back.
Now, who else wants a bottle?
You don't have to work.
You can lay off anytime.
I've got a few.
Complete relaxation while you're
taking it. Here you are.
Who'll have another bottle here?
Hey, Doc, let me have one
of them two bits.
Im awful sorry, lady. I haven't
got any more of...
the 10-cent ones.
They're all 25 cents, ma'am.
I didn't have enough.
There you are.
Who'll have another?
-Morning, Captain Eli.
-Hello, Doc.
Make yourself at home.
Say, what in thunder are you doin'?
Im just teaching you how to
salute my boat.
The Claremore Queen. Look at
her layin' over there.
Yeah.
Give her two more toots.
Say, that's four.
-That's a-That's a double salute.
-No.
Just honoring the unburied dead,
that's all.
Yeah, don't-don't try to poke
any fun at that.
Duke and I just bought it.
We saved up every nickel we
got to get that boat.
Duke?
That's your nephew, ain't it?
You bet your life. And he's a
great boy, Duke.
I thought he was pilot on the
Memphis Girl.
Well, he was. He's the main
pilot on there.
But not no more. He's making
his last trip...
and then he's comin' right on
there with me.
You stick to doctoring.
You ain't no steamboat man.
Cramp her, Mink.
Cramp her. Ill take her, Mink.
Well, admittin' Duke's a
pretty good boy...
what could you do on a steamboat?
Well, Im just gonna sit up in the
pilot's house...
and toot the whistle and listen
to that old river sing.
The way you brag, I suppose...
you're fixin' to stick that old
apple crate yonder...
in the big race to Baton Rouge
this summer.
I never had thought of that.
But that's an idea at that.
You know, the Claremore Queen
won that race in '84.
And with... And with Duke
as a pilot...
Ill bet she could win it again.
I suppose you'd like to bet your
boat against my boat...
on the result of that race, huh?
Well, l-I don't know.
Well, Ill bet you at that.
Ill bet you.
You made yourself a bet and lost
yourself a steamboat.
Come up and get it. Come on.
Good-bye, folks. Good-bye.
Ain't you gonna stay ashore here
with us, brother?
The devil's pretty active
around these parts.
Nay, brother. The Lord's a-callin'
me up the river.
Gotta wrestle with the captain of
the Memphis Girl.
He's backslid.
Well, durn my britches! The
Memphis Girl, huh?
Say, Ive got a nephew works
on that boat.
You need anybody to help you
wrestle with the devil,...
he'll help you.
He's the best wrestler in this
whole country.
His name's Duke. Duke's
his name.
Yes, sir. He's pilot of the boat.
Thank you, brother. Ill fetch
him the word.
You tell him to hurry on down
here. I ain't...
any man to be kept waitin'.
Good-bye, brother. Keep the faith.
You can count on me, Moses.
I ain't got no more use for liquor.
Hey, Doc!
That's two bottles you got.
Cost you a dollar.
I ain't got any money, Doc, but
I can work it out.
-'Work it out.' What can you do?
-Steamboat engineer.
Yeah? Steamboat engineer?
Are you an engineer? Huh?
Say, boy, you just drunk yourself
into a job. Come on in here.
Well, engineer, what do
you think of it?
Kind of looks as though a lot
of rats have to...
find themselves a new hole.
Well, of course it don't look
so good right now.
But you got to remember that...
Well, a steamboat...
is a female, you know?
And when they're struttin' up and
down the river where...
everybody's lookin' at 'em...
they're just like a woman with a
new Easter bonnet on.
But when nobody ain't lookin'
at 'em, why...
they get kind of careless and
don't care.
-Yeah-sloppy.
-Sloppy. That's right.
But with a-with a good, live man
on this boat like you are...
say, you can make this thing
perk up and strut.
Get some paint on her nose and get
these chickens out of here.
We can put them right in
the pot now.
Here. Here. Start flirtin'
with that.
But, Doc, you told me yourself
that a...
man couldn't do a lick of work
when he's on Pocahontas.
Oh, that's the first bottle.
But after that...
you've got to work to get the
best results out of it.
Now, hurry up. Duke's gonna be
here any day now...
and he'll be here.
Ooh! Look at that.
It says 'Captain.' It says
'Captain' on it.
Ain't that great? Oh, uh-Oh,
no. No, no.
Now, listen. We'll find a sign
painter up the...
river somewhere...
and Ill-we'll have 'Chief
Engineer'...
put on there, see?
And if I have any room, you know...
and you work good, we'll put
'First Mate.'
Come on, now. Let's get
goin'. Hurry up.
That you, Duke?
-Hello, Uncle John.
-Hey, you're kind...
of late, ain't you?
I guess I am, Uncle John.
Who-Who's that...
This is Fleety Belle, Uncle John.
She-She- She's a swamp
gal, ain't she?
Oh, I guess that's right. But...
But there's some mighty fine
people in the swamps.
You're actin' awful queer, Duke.
You done some thin' bad, ain't ya?
Mighty bad, Uncle John.
What'd you do?
I killed a man.
Well, was it on account of her
you done it?
Yes, sir.
Can Fleety Belle sit down and
get dry, Uncle John?
Guess so. Half the Claremore
Queen's yours, ain't it?
Its all right, Fleety Belle.
Uh, you all ain't had nothin' to
eat, have you?
I'd mighty like something
for Fleety Belle.
She's about worn out.
I got-
I got some hot coffee here.
Ill get some bacon in a minute.
Where'd you meet her?
Well, there ain't much to tell.
We was down at Blue Bottom
Bayou back of...
Hannan gettin' out timber.
Some swamp people come along
in their shanty boats.
I used to wave at 'em, tryin' to
be friends with 'em.
But they'd never wave back
or nothin'.
Just make their womenfolk
get indoors.
First time I seen Fleety Belle, I...
I thought she was a boy the way
she was dressed.
Well, I blowed my whistle...
and-and she waved back.
And her old man came out
and gave her a whippin'.
After that, I seen her pretty
near every, day.
Then her folks found out, and
her old man gave...
her a worse whippin;
And that's why she run away.
-Was it one of her kinfolks you killed?
-No, sir.
-It was Big Steve.
-Who's he?
Engineer on the Memphis Girl.
When he found Fleety Belle on
the steamboat...
where I was hiding her...
he started after her.
You know I don't get mad easy, but...
but when I do, it's like a-like
a thorn tree...
a-growin' and growin' inside
of me, and-
Well, we started in fightin'.
He drawed a knife...
and I picked up a chunk of
stove wood and...
throwed it at his hand.
And he ducked right into it,
and I knowed...
by the way he fell that he
was dead.
Well, then, ain't nobody can say
that that wasn't self-defense.
-Did anybody see it?
-Nobody but a-a preacher fella.
-Calls hisself the New Moses.
-I know 'im. I know him.
He come up on the Pride of
Paducah with me.
I sent a message to you by him.
Did he give it to you?
Yeah, he told me.
-He-He seen it, huh?
-He seen it.
And it was night, and he was
sleepin' on deck.
He didn't blame me none. Just
done a lot of prayin'...
and told me to give myself up.
I don't know nothin about
religion.
But he's right.
He-He's right.
You gotta give yourself up.
There ain't no jury could blame
you for...
doin' a thing like that.
Now, come on. Come on and sit
down there. Come sit down.
Get you something to eat here now.
Then we'll go on over. We'll
see the sheriff,...
and you can give yourself up.
No!
He ain't gonna give his self up.
Listen here. Who asked for any
opinion of...
yours on this thing?
You've done enough to him already.
Now, sit down there and get you
something to eat.
He's gonna do as I say. He knows
that he can trust me.
No, he ain't gonna do what you say.
We heard tell of this hangin' judge.
Ain't nobody gonna hurt Duke.
-Sit down!
-Sit down, Fleety Belle.
Eat some thin'.
Uncle John's right.
There ain't no thin' to run
away from.
I told you not to come here. We'd
be safe in the swamp.
Aw, swamps! He's a river man.
He couldn't live in the swamps.
He's not that kind of people.
But they'll hang you, Duke.
I know they will!
Aw, they won't do any such a
thing. They won't hang him.
Don't pay any attention to her,
Duke. She'll...
only get you in worse.
You shut up and stop sayin' that!
You're just thinkin' of yourself!
You don't care what...
happens to Duke!
Now, honey, Uncle John is-
I ain't never had no thin' to love
in my life, and...
Im not gonna let 'em take you.
Nobody's gonna take me away
from you, honey...
except maybe for a little while.
You and me gotta be free to get
married and-and...
live on this boat.
lf you don't come with me now,
you'll never see me again.
Come on, son. Let's get on over
and see the sheriff.
-You let him alone!
-Now, honey-
-Come on, son.
-I know why you're doin' this.
Its because you hate me, and
you think I ain't...
good enough for him.
Comin', Duke?
Im comin', Uncle John.
But you've gotta take care of
Fleety Belle while Im gone.
Rufe? Rufe?
Sure is quiet up here.
Sleeps right upstairs there.
See if I can wake him up here.
Rufe?
Hello down there. Well,
good heaven Betsy.
What are you doin' down there
this time of night,...
Doc? Can't you let a man sleep?
Come on down. Duke... Duke
killed a man.
Well, doggone me. Who was it,
Duke? Somebody I knowed?
Fella named Big Steve.
-Never heard of him.
-Come on-Come on down, Rufe.
Now, Doc, there ain't no need of
me comin' down them stairs.
Wait just a minute. Ill
fix you up.
Here you be, Duke.
Now just open her up and make
yourself at home.
Take the first bed you take a
liking to. And, Doc...
just hang the keys on the front
doorknob, will ya?
Ill be seein' you in the mornin'
now about breakfast time.
Good night.
Huh.
You'd think somebody killed a man
every day around here...
and come and give their self up.
Hey, you. Girl!
Come on inside here now.
Supper's about ready.
Sit down.
-Sit down!
-I ain't go in' to! You sit down!
I don't want nobody wait in' on me.
I know you hate me, and
I don't care.
Duke told me to stay here, and
Im gonna do it.
As soon as he gets out, him and
me's goin' away.
And we ain't comin' back neither.
Maybe you're goin' away,
but he ain't.
Yes, he is.
Now, we'll see about that. I never
knew of any good...
comin' of a river man get tin'
mixed up with swamp trash.
Hey, look out there! Hey.
You know-Say, you're a...
You're a spunky little rascal,
you know it?
You-
You kind of got to admire
you at that.
-There she is!
-Just wait till I get you home.
-No, I ain't a-go in'!
-Ill beat the hide...
off of you for this...
runnin' off with a river man,
shamin' me in...
the face of the Lord.
Makin' trash out of herself.
I don't know as I want...
to marry her now.
She'll marry you, Ben, after Pop
gives her a good whoppin'.
-Oh, I won't! I won't! I won't!
-You'll shut up!
Darn you! Ill beat the livin'...
-Hold on there!
-Go ahead and beat me!
That's all I ever knowed.
Take me back.
But I won't marry him, and
you can't make me.
Ill run away, and Ill... Ill keep
on doin' it till you kill me!
Now, you listen to me. And you
don't have to go anywhere.
-Oh, shut up!
-He's just lookin' for trouble.
Go ahead. Give it to him.
Ain't no sin runnin' off with
the man you love...
and ain't nobody gonna make
me say it is.
You heard what she said. Now,
go on! Get out of here!
-Hit him in the chin, Pop!
-Ill bust him one!
Go ahead, Ben. Don't take
none of his sass.
Ain't no river man gonna tell
me what to do.
She's my young 'un, and
I got the right.
There ain't nobody gonna tell her
what to do but Duke.
-Im her pa.
-Yes, and Duke is her husband.
Her and Duke... Her and Duke
was married.
There can't be no thin' wrong
about that, can there?
He's lyin', Pap!
I ain't a-gonna marry her now
no how. I don't want...
no river man's trash!
You bet your life you're
not a-gonna.
Say, just a minute here.
Say, Ive stood just about
all the insults...
Im gonna stand out of you people.
You can't come in here talkin' to
that girl like that.
That's Duke's wife.
-Now get out of here, you swamp
trash! -Now, wait a minute.
-Put that down.
-Come on, you swamp rats! Get out of
here!
-Look, Pappy! There's my shoes.
-Hey, drop them shoes!
Ow!
Fine lot of kinfolks you got.
Id mighty like to thank you for
what you've done.
Well, you oughta thank me.
Hadn't been for me, they'd have
got your shoes.
-But-But, I mean, you fixed it...
-Well, yes.
lf you hadn't give me the knife,
they might have...
got 'em anyhow.
Com in' in here bother in' us just
when we're gonna enjoy...
our supper here together.
Hmph. That's a fine lot of
kinfolks havin'...
like that. Swamp people.
Look at that bacon. Look at that.
Its all burned.
Look. Look at that.
Let me fix it.
Huh? What do you know about
coo kin' bacon?
I bet you never did cook no thin'
but catfish.
Hey, what is that-Here.
What is that? Is that-Is that an
old tablecloth...
of somebody's? Huh?
What is it?
You can't wear a thing like that
to the court-
You can't wear... You can't wear
that to the courtroom.
You've got to...
No wonder Duke couldn't tell whether
you was a boy or a girl.
Look at that.
Sure used to make them
Yanks run in that.
Look at that. Huh?
That belonged to... That belonged
to Duke's mother.
She was the prettiest woman
I ever saw in my life...
even if she was my sister.
She was a skinny little thing,
just like you.
There you go. There you go.
Lettin' the bacon burn up that way.
That's all you women think about...
just clothes.
Dr. John, do you think any body'll
take me for a swamp girl?
Swamp girl? What, in those clothes?
No more swamp girl. Say, there's
gals up in the big city...
like-like Vicksburg that ain't got
duds like those.
You know where those clothes come
from? Way up to Memphis.
Do you think... Do you think
Duke'll like it?
Like it? Say, he ain't even gonna
recognize you at first.
Duke's gonna have two
sweethearts now.
-Two?
-Yeah. Gonna have two.
You and the Claremore Queen.
Say, we gotta hurry up here. Let's
get to prancin' here. Come on.
'Twas me done this to Duke.
Its all my fault. I ought to let
him run away like you said.
You was right about that
hangin judge.
Guess I thought 'cause
I was older...
that l-I knew more about right and
wrong than you all did.
Duke ain't blamin' you, Dr. John.
I know he ain't. But you are.
I ain't blamin' nobody.
You ain't no more surprised
about it than I be, Doc.
Aw. You up there supposed to
be savin' a man's life.
Then you're talkin' to the judge
about real estate.
What'd you wanna start an argument
with him for?
Well, 'tweren't my fault. You seen
the way he led around to it.
He's held a grudge against me
ever since I sold...
him that bottom land.
'Tweren't my fault the river
run over it.
Oh, well, if you'd let me have my
way and let me go find the...
New Moses who's the only man
that saw the thing-
Had him here as a witness, Duke
could've been free...
and out of here.
Aw, shucks. He ain't been
hung yet.
Just wait and see the way I handle
this appeal. I tell you...
You just wait a minute now. You
ain't gonna handle any appeal.
You know what I want you to do?
I want you to go down to...
Baton Rouge and I want you to
get a... get a good lawyer.
Get the best lawyer you can get.
Get a-Get a smart lawyer.
Cost a heap of money.
Them big fellows wouldn't even
worry about Duke...
for less than $500.
Five hundred dollars?
Well, if his life ain't worth $500,
it ain't worth nothin'.
You go get the lawyer, will ya?
You get the lawyer.
Ill get the $500 somehow
or another.
Come on, honey.
Howdy, Doc!
Oh, hello, Rufe.
Mighty sorry to hear about the way
Duke's case turned out.
Well, ain't hung him yet.
That's the truth as I see it.
They ain't goin' to either.
What-What's that you got there?
Why, ain't you heard? Why,
Professor Marvel done...
skipped town owin' everybody.
Left his whole show and the
calliope and everything.
Come on in and see the show, honey.
It'll cheer you right up.
They got a dead fish in here.
They call it a whale.
Why, the whole tent's just chuck
full of things...
that'll give you the shivers.
Come on in. Yes, sir.
All the greatest folks in history,
from John the Baptist...
plumb down to the king of England.
There's Little Eva sittin' there.
Old Uncle Tom's layin' around
here somewheres.
You know the story of Little
Eva, honey?
-No.
-Well, just as well.
Oh, here. Lookee. Its Daniel Boone.
-That Daniel Boone?
-That's Daniel Boone.
You-You know the story
of Daniel Boone?
-No.
-Ill tell you that sometime.
That's a-That's a great story.
Oh, here. Look here. Ill bet
that's the old bloodhound,...
ain't it, Sheriff?
Huh?
Got ya there, Doc.
Lookee here. You see that
statue there?
-Uh-huh.
-That's Ulysses S. Grant.
-Yeah? Who's that?
-Oh.
-The woman leadin' the horse?
-Yeah.
Why, that's Victory,.
Ain't it just like some durned
Yankee to let the lady walk?
They do it every time. But
lookee here, Doc.
Ill bet you this here's somethin'
that you ain't...
never seen before.
There's been a heap of argument
around town...
about this here whale.
And Professor Marvel, now,
he claimed that...
it's the very identical whale that
swallowed Jonah.
Well, it looks old enough to be.
Yes, and look here at the size of
this here mouth.
Ain't nobody in here.
Thunderation!
Ain't nobody in here, white folks.
-Holy Moses!
-Moses nothin'.
-Say, that's Jonah.
-No, it's just me.
I worked for the doctor, and I just...
Well, come on out of there now.
Ain't nobody gonna harm you.
-What you doin' in there?
-Nothin'. I was just-
Thought you thought I was Mr...
Professor, and l-
Say. Say, wait a minute here, Rufe.
You know, I got an idea. See what
you think of this, Fleety.
What do you say... You want to get
your money out of this, don't ya?
Sure do.
What do you say you let me take
this on the Claremore Queen...
and Ill soon have your money back.
And we can get Duke that appeal
lawyer too.
Well, I don't see how nobody can
kick about that.
-Do you go with this?
-Yes, sir, I works here.
I play the banjo and the mouth
organ and the calliope and...
-Calliope?
-Yes, sir, and the...
-What's your name?
-Well, I was baptized...
David Begat Solomon, but...
-David Begat what?
-David Begat Solomon.
But I changed it to George Lincoln
Washington.
Well, now, listen. lf you're goin'
with me, we're gonna...
stick to the Bible.
-You're Jonah.
-Yes, sir. But I can't swim.
Where do you want this
virgin queen?
Put her there by her husband.
What do I know about a king and
queen anyhow?
All I ever did do is sell medicine
up and down this river here.
But Ill tell you, if we get right
down to earth...
and we can change these people
around into people these...
folks on the river wanna see...
we can make a lot of money.
Now, for instance, who-who's
your favorite female?
-Pocahontas.
-Pocahontas. That's great.
Now, we'll just make Pocahontas
out of her, see?
Get some feathers and some
paint and all.
Who was the feller she was with?
What was his name?
-Captain John Smith.
-Captain John-Here-
Here's Captain John Smith
right here.
Over here, we'll take this fella.
The gentleman here is...
'King George'-One, two, three.
King George III.
I never heard of him. We'll make
that gentleman...
into George Washington.
That's who it is. And this
one over here...
we'll take him...
Hey, hey.
Hey, that's Napoleon.
Better leave him alone.
Uh-Now, here. Here's these two
New Moseses here.
I think they're old prophets
of some kind.
But there ain't nobody interested
in prophets nowadays.
I tell you, we'll make outlaws
out of them.
-Frank and Jesse James.
-That's great. That's-
Everybody wants to see the
James boys.
Pop, I just now done told you,
Topsy goes back...
there with Uncle Tom.
You know good and well she
don't goes with Napoleon.
Here's Mr. Ulysses S. Grant,
Mr. Doctor.
Grant? Oh, say. I just happened
to think.
Say, we got to go right
by Vicksburg.
And they ain't never forgot
down there.
No wonder old Professor
Marvel skipped town.
You know, I knew a fellow that
got run out of...
Vicksburg for just lookin'
like him.
I tell you, if you all don't
want him...
this uniform just about fits me.
You'll have to change him to
somebody else.
Say, Im gonna change him.
You know what Ill do?
Take that old cigar out of
his mouth...
and we'll make him Robert E. Lee.
I been waitin' here kind of hop in'
you'd come.
Gets mighty lonesome sometimes.
I had to come.
We're leaving tomorrow.
Ain't no thin' nicer than...
go in' up and down the river.
Dr. John's got the appeal lawyer.
He's gonna send you the money
fast as we take it in.
I sure would like to be in them
river towns and see your show.
Oh, it's mighty beautiful.
Fella in here used to work in a
tattoo parlor in...
Perryville, and-
Well, I kind of been get tin' some
tattoo in' done myself.
I wished I could see it.
Well-
See what it says under the heart?
Its my name.
Ive been learn in' to play
the saw too.
I wish I could hear it.
I only know one tune, and...
I don't know that very good.
There's some thin' I gotta tell
you, Fleety Belle.
You know that girl that waits on
table across the street?
Well, l-I waved at her once.
Ill bet she waved at you first.
Ive gotta go.
Fleety Belle, you ain't...
ain't never kissed me yet.
Put it over a little bit. Put
it over a little.
A little more there. Now just
hold it steady.
You don't want me to run into that
sandbar, do you, Captain John?
Hmm? What-Hey, hey! Look out there!
Say, wait a minute there.
Hey, you got to make up your mind
who you're gonna...
take orders from-
me or you.
Now, hold her right there now.
Right there.
You think Im learnin'?
Say, you takin' to the river just
like an old turtle.
lf you listen to me, you'll be the
best pilot on the whole river...
outside of Duke and me.
I sure would like to get back
and see Duke.
You ain't, uh, getting tired of
my company already.
Why, you know that ain't so.
I ain't never had a dream like this.
I ain't never knowed nobody
like you.
Why, you bought me dresses
and pretty things...
like I ain't never see'd before.
Sometimes, when we're goin'
down the river at night...
I get to thinkin' about Duke...
and what you done for him and me.
Seems like I can hardly stand it.
I feel like the Lord's just shamin'
me for having hated you so.
Yeah.
Don't have to... worry about...
The Lord's a lot broad-minded than
you think he is anyhow.
Put her over a little bit. Look out
for this bend.
That's it. Hold it steady.
Steamboat round the bend!
Hey, that's the river talk! Steamboat
round the bend.
Steamboat round the bend!
Here she comes.
Hey, you know what that is? That's
the Pride of Paducah.
Its old Captain Eli.
Want to just give that old snap pin'
turtle a toot here...
-to show him my boat can toot
louder than his.
Hey, Doc!
Don't forget Im gonna own that
old mud scow...
when I win this race!
Yeah, the only time you ever gon'
pass me is when...
you go in' the other way.
Say, what are you on that museum...
the mummy?
And, say, you better stay away
from Salt Creek.
They lynched one of them hootchy
kootchy shows there last week.
Where was you sittin', on
the front row?
I sure was!
Cramp 'er, Mink! Cramp 'er!
You know, Captain John...
maybe he's right about Salt Creek.
Oh, that old bullfrog don't know
what he's talking about.
Salt Creek's the last town we gonna
show anything.
Then we going home.
See Duke.
Oh! Now, look, say, don't do that.
There ain't no thin' run you on the
sandbar quicker...
than a lot of hug gin' and kiss in'.
I didn't mean to.
You didn't mean to? Well, that's
a fine thing to say.
lf you didn't mean to, maybe Id
better give it back.
Too much foolishness go in'
on around here.
Change your clothes quick now.
Put on a fancy dress.
Gonna show those folks in
Salt Creek some...
fancy pilot in' now.
Give 'em a little toot.
Oh, say, there's a lot of folks
com in' tonight!
It looks like the biggest night
we've had in a long time.
Come on.
Got some change? Get up
in there now.
Come on, Jonah. Get that started.
Well, well, well, now. Well,
welcome, brother.
Welcome to Dr. John's Floating
Museum.
The show is just about to start, so
get your tickets right here.
There ain't gonna be no show.
No? Just, uh-Just where did you,
uh, get that...
information, brother?
'Cause we're gonna chop up your
boat, mister.
-Yeah, and burn it up too!
-We'll give you a trail to travel!
And a bucket of tar for that gal!
Come on. Let's pull this museum
out of here!
Mr. Efe! Mr. Efe! They're tear in'
the boat down,...
them gentlemen!
Mr. Doc and Miss Fleety and them
standing round...
there, lookin' round!
I never been so scared in
all my life!
They got pickaxes and they
got ax handles...
-Stand back there!
-Hold up your hands!
-Look out, pappy! He's got a gun!
-I see him.
-Im gon'shoot!
-Wait a minute, boys!
Don't shoot. Just hold that till I tell
you. They've got the...
wrong impression.
-This ain't no show.
-How come she ain't a show?
You got a 'calli-oop.'
Yeah, I know. But this is a museum.
Its educational!
-How come she's educational?
-Well, because...
because it is, that's why!
Now, un cock your guns, boys,
because you may...
let 'em go off accidentally.
Just hold it until I tell you to.
Its educational. Did you ever see
a petrified man? Huh?
No, you never did. Well, we got
one in there. Ain't we, honey?
We got one in there, and he's
Im gonna let you all come in there
and see with your own eyes...
and it ain't gonna cost you one nickel.
And if everything that Ive told
you about out here ain't in...
there just like I told ya...
then you can come out
and chop it down.
Now, friends, there ain't nobody
that rightfully...
knows just how old she is.
There is people that say a whale
grows an inch...
every hundred years.
So, well, you can figure it out
for yourself.
That's not a fish. This ain't a
fish. That's a mammal.
-Its a...
-A mammal.
Well, I mean it raises its young
just like a cow does.
Yes!
And it breathes just the same
as you and l.
And when it gets waterlogged, it
blows it out through...
these breathing places in its head.
Ill show you. Efe, let her
breathe a little.
Pappy, it breathed all over me!
There you are. Now, is she
educational, or ain't she?
There's a powerful lot of learning
in a whale.
Neighbor, this thing is worth
payin' for.
Im glad to hear you say that.
-Rex, pass the hat.
-Come on, Rex.
Rex, better get your pappy's hat.
Yours leaks.
Over this way, gentlemen, you have
George Washington,...
the father of his country!
You can't leave without
seein' Pappy!
I told you on the outside that l
had George Washington...
here. I wasn't lyin' to ya.
Friends, that certainly is
a fine man!
All my life Ive thought that
about him and what...
he's done for our country.
-Will you be here tomorrow?
-No, Im sorry.
I won't be here tomorrow.
I sure would like to have my old
woman see him, if she...
could get away from her plowin'.
She got a picture of him, and
ain't more than a week...
goes by she don't look at it.
Well, Im awful sorry, but we got
to be in Beaver...
Slough tomorrow.
-They're waitin' for us.
-Don't suppose you could spare...
me a piece of his hair, could ya?
Well, no, I don't...
Me and her'd be mighty proud to
have a piece of...
George Washington's hair.
Well, Im gonna give you a little
piece here.
Of course, I don't want you to have
to make your wife quit plowin'.
There it is. You be very careful of
that. Take good care of that.
Right over this way, gentlemen!
Right over here!
Call your attention to the stage!
All right, Fleety...
Belle, Efe, Jonah.
Gentlemen, General Robert E. Lee.
Look away, look away Look away,
Dixieland
Attention!
I wish I was in Dixie, I say, I say
Away, away A-way down South
in Dixie.
Away, away A-way down South
in Dixie.
I wish I was in the land of cotton.
Old times there is not forgotten.
Look away, look away Look
away, Dixieland.
-Come on.
-Howdy there, Doc, Fleety Belle!
Hello! Hello!
-Hello!
-Hello, Sheriff.
The way this gal drag you up that
hill, you'd think...
she wanted to see somebody.
How's Duke?
Oh, fine as a frog hair. Never
knowed a man...
could keep so happy.
Wait'll you hear him play
on that saw.
Man, he really whips 'er. And he
eats more'n a horse.
You wanna feed him good,
'cause there ain't...
nothin' too good for Duke.
That's the truth as I see it. Sure
hate to see him get hung.
What are you talking about?
Why are you joking...
about a thing like that?
Ain't you heard? The court done
turned down his appeal.
-Who said so?
-Doc, Im sorry.
I thought you knowed.
I got my orders in my pocket.
I gotta take him to...
Baton Rouge tomorrow night.
Duke!
Duke!
Fleety Belle.
-Duke, it ain't so, is it?
-I guess it is.
They can't take you, Duke.
They can't!
Aw, don't cry, honey.
I guess things just gotta
be that way.
Id just about die if I never was
married to you.
Oh, dear, you're such a skinny
little thing.
You know, my Bonnie Lou got
married in this dress.
She was a little stouter than
you are, though.
Its awful pretty.
Dear, I wished I had some
orange blossoms.
Don't seem like no weddin' without
no orange blossoms.
Addie May, dear, run along and fix
the flowers. That's a good girl.
Yes, sir, Duke, Im gonna give you
a real good 'un.
This makes 13 folks that Ive
married what...
was gonna get hung.
I guess that's a record.
Sheriff down in Big Bend, he
claimed he done 14.
But never was nobody could find
where it was...
put down in a book.
Now, these 'uns I done.
Every one of' em is wrote right
here in my family Bible,...
where anybody can see 'em.
-Uh, everything's ready, Pop.
-That's fine, Addie May.
Got your flowers all put around?
That's good.
Doc, got the piano set.
Guess we're about ready to go.
Now, Addie May, can you play
the 'Wedding March'?
Can't play nothing but 'Listen to
the Mockingbird.'
I reckon that'll have to do.
We gotta have some...
music to get the bride in here.
Run on over to the piano, dear.
We'll be ready...
in just a minute.
-Ma! Oh, Ma! 'Bout ready?
-Yeah! We're a-waitin'.
Won't be but a minute.
Pappy, you gotta give her away,
'cause you done it for...
me when you was in here last time.
Bub, let the boys in.
Now, you boys quiet down and
get settled now.
Don't wanna have no disturbance.
Gonna start the...
ceremony in just a minute.
Doc, the old jail looks kinda
cheerful, don't it?
Yeah.
Go ahead, dear. Go ahead.
All right, begin, Addie May.
Friends...
we are gathered here in the
eyes of God...
and one another...
for the purpose of joining together...
this here man and this here woman
in holy matrimony.
Can't nobody rightly say
nothin' agin marriage...
'cause I reckon God intended...
every, body to live that-a-way.
Cause every, living human
on this earth...
has got to find his mate...
sometime or other.
And when God put Noah
in the ark...
he told him to take two of
everything.
'Cause God knowed that
was right...
and I guess he knowed what
it was to be lonesome.
Now, if Duke and Fleety
Belle here...
had a notion...
they're only carrying out the
Word of God.
And right here
I wanna say a word about Duke.
There ain't never been a finer man...
in this here jail.
That's the truth as I see it.
Course, we're all mighty sorry,
that Duke's gotta...
go and get himself hung.
Don't seem just-just right.
But that ain't got nothin' to do
with this ceremony,...
I guess. Has it, Doc?
All right, Duke...
do you take this here woman to be
your lawful wedded wife...
until death do ye part?
I do.
And you, Fleety Belle, do you
take this here man...
for your lawful wedded husband...
until death do ye part?
I do.
You got a ring, Duke?
I got it.
Just put it on her finger there.
That looks like it might have been
your mother's, son.
-It was.
-All right.
I now pronounce you man and wife...
until death do ye part.
Go ahead and kiss her, son.
Hurry up now, Duke.
Here she comes!
Yeah. Darned ol' train. It would
be on time.
Duke 'n' me be down in Baton Rouge
before midnight.
I hate to do this, Duke, but it's
according to the law.
I guess you done all you
could, Rufe.
They ain't takin' you!
Go on, Duke! Get away!
Ain't no sense in that. I don't
wanna get you in trouble.
Or you either, Uncle John. I don't
wanna get you...
in no trouble either, Rufe.
You been mighty good to me.
Oh, that's all right, Duke. I ain't
holdin' no grudge.
Well, guess I kinda lost my
head too.
I wanted to see him get away.
Don't cry, honey. Rufe ain't gonna
hold nothin' against ya.
Don't reckon we'll be needin' these
handcuffs none, Duke.
All aboard!
-Come on, let's get on.
Go ahead, Duke.
Don't you worry, honey.
You know what we gonna do?
You know?
We gonna get on that boat and we
gonna go all up...
and down that river.
And we're gonna hunt and hunt till
we- till we find the New Moses.
We'll find him somewhere.
Hey, brother, you seen anything
of the New Moses?
Yes, sir! He was down in the swamp
baptizin' about a week ago!
Hello, friends! Hey, have you seen
anything of the New Moses?
Brother, he was here two weeks ago...
and I ain't had a drop since!
Uncle John, come here!
Look!
What is it? Huh?
Oh! Say, that does look like a
baptizin'. That might be him.
Pull over here.
Hey! Hey, brothers! Is that
the New Moses?
No, brother, but I am the
New Elijah!
Hallelujah! Hallelujah!
Hallelujah!
No. Its the wrong prophet.
Folks out there don't look like
they seen...
anybody com in' through here.
Hey, brothers! You seen anything
of the New Moses?
Brother, I ain't even seen the
old Moses!
Fresh thing. Hmph.
-Your joke's old enough
- you ought have seen the old Moses.
Looks like we've missed him
everywhere we've...
gone, Fleety Belle.
Duke ain't got much time
left, Uncle John.
I know that.
I been racking my brain every
night and day...
since the thing happened.
l-I don't know. I just wouldn't
wanna go on...
livin' if they hang that boy.
I ain't goin' to neither.
But they ain't gonna hang Duke.
Im not sayin' we're gonna save
him, but they...
ain't gonna hang him.
I don't know.
Nobody but the Lord knows
about that.
Ain't got but two days left.
Say, wait, I got a no-T-Take
the wheel and hold it.
Let me think a minute. You know
what Im gonna do?
Im goin' right and see the governor.
-Could ya?
-Yes! Well, they say he...
ain't forgot us old soldiers.
You know, I remember
him at Shiloh.
He was certainly dealin' them
Yankees...
a powerful lot of misery there then.
Im just gonna go see him and
tell him that we...
can't find the New Moses...
and this is not Duke's fault.
Let's put her around now.
We'll turn right around and take
her into Baton Rouge.
Oh, what's the idea of his comin'
up here now?
Don't he know we got a race on?
Say, what's he doin'? Wavin'
us in there?
Go back, will ya! Go back, I say!
We're gonna have a race!
Hey! What's the idea wavin'
us in there?
We goin' on up the river!
The river's been cleared for
the race, Doc!
Nobody can get through until
they get away!
Get that floatin' henhouse
out of the way!
Henhouse? What's he doing, calling
this thing a henhouse?
What are you talking about?
Why don't you do as I tell you
and go back?
What do you mean, callin'
this a henhouse?
Henhouse! Can't you understand
English?
I said go back, not up river!
I-Aww.
Now, you captains ain't gonna
start until...
the cannons go off.
Then you can do what you please.
The first boat that reaches Baton
Rouge wins the...
race as well as the prize...
from the governor's own hand.
Here, Clay, hey, what's the idea
of flaggin' me in here?
Sorry, Doc, but you know the
rules of the race.
Im not in the race. Im tryin' to
get to Baton Rouge.
Oh, no, you ain't, either.
I knowed you'd try to back
out of that race.
Scared you'll lose that old
chicken coop.
Chicken coop, nothin'. You still
wanna bet the Pride of Paducah...
against the Claremore Queen?
As I recall, that was the
terms of the bet,...
unless you're crawfishing.
Winner takes both boats.
Is that so? Well, Ill just take
you up on that.
Ill bet you my boat against
yours, whole hog...
or none with me.
Ill go in the race. Itll slow
me up going to...
Baton Rouge, but Ill go in.
What time do we start?
Sergeant Benson shoots off that
cannon in five minutes.
Now, wait. Give me time to load
on some firewood.
Im purt' near out.
Same ol' Pokey-hontas.
Always full of alibis.
You couldn't win if you put
wings on!
She starts when the gun goes off.
That's the rules.
You fellas better hurry and get
on your boats.
Ill lay the course, Mink.
I don't wanna start off by running
over them floatin' waxworks.
Get ready, Cap. Cannon's about
to go 'boom!'
Get ready below!
Hey, come on there, Fleety Belle.
Don't be standin' around.
-Are we really goin' in the race?
-Sure. We got to get...
down the river anyhow.
Ready!
Hey, Doc, better hug close
to shore!
No tellin' when that ol' honey
wagon's gonna sink.
Aw, you shut up, you old...
Uh, hush up.
Hey, Efe! Stand by now! Full head
of steam on all the time!
Come on, honey.
Let me get it, now.
I wanna get a flyin' start. That's
the boat we got...
to beat, this Pride of Paducah.
Hey, Uncle Jeff, throw off your
spring line!
We way ahead! Look here!
Lemme show ya!
They way back there! See 'em
back there?
You can see that Cherokee boat,
they way back there!
But that Pride of Paducah is
right up there!
I believe it's gon' slip by!
Better get some more of that
steam, if you can, in there!
We out in front now, if we can
just hold it.
Yeah, but the Cherokee's catching
up with us.
Holler down to Efe!
-Tell him to pour the wood to 'er.
-Efe, what steam you carryin'?
Im just a-wonderin', Mink, where
we gonna put...
that prize when we win it tomorrow.
Down in the clerk's office?
Uh, in the pilot's house,
I should say.
Well, maybe that would be best.
Uncle John, look! Its the
New Moses!
But-Say, it is the New Moses!
It is!
Pull it over! Pull right over!
Pull her over! Pull her over!
Pull her over! Pull her over!
Away! Away!
Hallelujah! Glory be! Hallelujah!
-Hallelujah!
-Be careful!
Hallelujah! Glory be! Hallelujah!
-Hallelujah!
-Get him on the boat, quick!
-Hallelujah!
-Glory, be! Hallelujah!
Glory, be! Hallelujah!
Hallelujah! Glory be! Glory be!
-Hallelujah!
-Glory be!
Brother, what are you doing here?
-Helpin' to win a race.
-Race? Gambling?
-Devil's work!
-Oh, no, no!
This is a race to save a life.
Its Duke. They're...
gonna hang him in the morning.
-But they can't! I seen it!
-That's what I want...
you to tell the governor!
No, I got souls to save.
No, you got a life to save, and the
Lord don't care which one...
of your jobs you do first.
Keep a-goin', Fleety Belle!
Can I get you a drink of water
or somethin', Mr. Moses?
Just lucky he didn't
bump his head on that boat.
Hallelujah!
Glory, be, Brother Efe!
Hallelujah!
Into the fiery furnace! Into the
fiery furnace!
-Glory be!
-Hallelujah!
Glory be, brother!
Come!
We must have more wood!
Chop up the decks here! Chop
everything that burns!
Every-
Anything that burns!
Must have more wood!
Say, look here, honey.
Can you get over there and get
right in behind him?
Sure, I can. Yeah.
-In his backwash?
-Uh-huh.
Because if you can, the Lord has
given me an idea.
Here she comes!
Mink, when I get sound asleep,
take this here...
cigar out of my mouth, will ya?
Burnt up three, four steamboats
that-a-way.
-Mornin', Mink.
-Morning, Captain.
Mornin', Captain Eli! Have
a good night?
Holy jumpin' catfish!
Fletch! Fletch! Get an ax!
Get an ax and chop that old
scow loose!
Doc, you connivin' old scoundrel!
It 'taint fair! It 'taint fair!
Im just as sore 'bout it as you
are, Captain Eli...
when I found out we'd been
pushin' you all night.
Ah, son...
I wouldn't keep watching that
scaffold if I were you.
I ain't seen it, Reverend.
I was watchin' up the river.
I sure thought Uncle John and Fleety
Belle would be here today.
Well, maybe they'll be able
to get here yet.
Ill stay here with you.
-How much time I got?
-Oh, a couple of hours.
-Let me read to you a little.
-Please.
The fire's dyin' out, Doc. The
boiler's gettin' cold.
She ain't got another lick in 'er.
We're sure licked now.
-You got to keep the fires goin'.
-Ain't got nothin' else to burn!
-Well, burn that museum!
-Huh?
Right!
Moses!
Doc said burn up the museum!
The mu-Good idea!
You gon' burn up Mr. George
Washington? Hey!
I wonder how come they can...
In!
Mr. Moses, that's Miss Carry,
'Notion'; Lookee here-Hey!
Hey, Mr. Efe!
Mr. Efe! Hey!
Its me, Mr. Efe! Hey! Its me!
Its me! Its Jonah, Mr. Efe!
Go on, brother!
-Hallelujah!
-Go on, brother!
Glory be! Hallelujah!
-Get everything in there!
-Get that drinkin'...
chap over there!
In with the demon rum!
In he goes! Here we are!
Cramp her, Mink! Get in that
current and cramp her sharp!
Hey, Clem!
Give 'er everything you've got!
Spread 'er wide open and put two
more men on the safety valve!
Mr. Efe, there they is there!
Hurry up, Uncle Jeff!.
They sneakin' by!
-Hallelujah! Glory be! Hallelujah!
-Glory be!
-Only six to do now!
-Glory be!
Come on, brother! Into the
fiery furnace!
There they come, Mr. Efe! You
better make a fire up!
You better make it hotter!
You just takin' your time!
You can't get no steam!
There they go! I know good
and well we...
gon' have to catch 'em again!
-Take 'er, Mink.
-Ive got 'er.
Hot ziggety! We got him beat
four ways to Sunday now!
Glory be! Hold 'er steady, Mink!
Ain't there somethin' we can get
in there and...
keep 'er goin' a little further?
-We're purt' near there.
-We ain't got steam...
enough to raise a blister.
Don't seem fair. They're gonna
hang Duke, and we...
in spittin' distance of Baton Rouge.
Nothing can save us now but the
power of prayer.
Hey! What are you drinkin' there?
Medicine.
Brother Efe, you've been deceivin'
me! That's demon rum!
Hey, that's Pocahontas. Its never
failed us yet.
-Say, we got 10 gallons, right?
-Ten? We got a hundred!
Then fire it up! Down with
demon rum!
Down with demon rum!
Down with it!
Down with the demon rum!
Into the fiery-
Hallelujah!
Hallelujah!
Boy, that stuff is dangerous!
-Give it here!
-Keep it goin'!
Down with the demon rum!
There we are! Into the fiery
furnace!
-Glory, be!
-Id love to see ol'...
Captain Eli's face now!
Gosh almighty! Say, look, Mink!
Look at the way the smoke's
comin' out of'er!
Hey, Clem! Clem!
Feed 'er rosin!
Yes, and a barrel of pitch!
We'd better get hotter! I ain't
gonna rest,...
so we'd better catch that-
Hallelujah!
That must be some powerful
roots and herbs...
in this Pocahontas.
Yea, brother! More! More!
Hurl away the demons!
Yes! There they are!
Hurl away the demons!
That's it!
Mink, he's crawlin' up.
We're comin' into... We're comin'
into Baton Rouge!
That's Baton Rouge!
O God in heaven, look down upon
this, thy son...
Excuse me, Reverend.
Say, Duke, is there any last
request you'd like to make?
I sure would like to see the
finish of that race.
Well, I ain't got no objection to
that. But Rufe...
told me that you-
That's all right. Anything Duke
wants suits me.
Well, Id like to see the finish
of that race myself.
So, we'll let 'er go as soon as
the Pride of Paducah...
comes around the bend.
-Thank you, sir.
-It won't be long.
-There she comes!
Well, all right, son.
Let's go.
Wait a minute! That ain't the
Pride of Paducah!
Its the Claremore Queen!
-Well, let's go.
-Good-bye, Duke.
O Father, Father, I beseech thee...
at this moment look down
upon thy son...
in this, his hour of need.
Grant him strength. Grant
him praise...
Wait! Wait! Wait!
Wait! Wait! Wait!
I pardon this boy!