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Suffering Cassandra (2013)
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(TENSE MUSIC) (ROCKET SOARING) (MAN BEAT BOXING) All right what's the matter? You love it when I beat box. Did I do anything? No. Did I say anything? No but that's just my point you're not doing or saying anything. Can I just sit here and not do or say anything and have that be fine? If you're catatonic. Don't be an asshole. I know you're in a bad mood, I know why you're in a bad mood I just wish you wouldn't be. I'm not in a bad mood we just got a late start it's gonna be dark in a few hours and we still have to do this. You're being insensate. I don't know what that means. We'll be in and out. I doubt. Even though it's still a little ridiculous Cassie you spent... I really don't wanna have this conversation right now. But we need to at some point. No, stop concentrate. I am concentrating I'm concentrating on the incendiary chemical reaction level that my body is experiencing. Yeah well drive or we're gonna have an incendiary crash. Fine, fine. You'll be in and out right? Yes I'll grab my laptop charger and we'll go. Good 'cause I fucking hate her. Glad I'm getting you out of town for a few days. We'll be moving you into your dorm soon you'll start school a couple of days from now we will be over all of this. Right back here. Yes because I work here, I'm out of school it's election season I barely got the weekend off to do this. You'll be right back here with Helen, and you'll be three hours away. Helen is nothing more than a good friend of mine. Who wants to sleep with you. She doesn't wanna sleep with me and I don't wanna sleep with her, I don't feel for her that way I feel for you that way. How can you say that you two have a history together. History repeats itself Eddy. That is a completely irrelevant adage. You told her you loved her. Freshman year, Jesus you wanna talk about history repeating itself... What? We have this argument over and over I want you to trust me. It's called a woman's intuition. It's called an erroneous notion. I'm not getting out of the car when we get there. EDDY: Why not? Because fuck her. Please try and be nice, she's not aware of her status as our relationship's primary affama. I'm not getting out of the car. It's getting really cold in here. I don't like artificial comfort, it bugs me. (UPBEAT MUSIC) (CAR DOOR SLAMMING) (CALM MUSIC) (KNOCKING) - Hey! - EDDY: Yo. Where's Cassandra? In the car. Hey you made it, woo! Senior year, yeah! So you got my charger? Jeez, all business huh? I'm sorry that was crass. Not unlike you. Helen. Yes. How are you? I'm good. Do you have my charger? (LAUGHING) What no good? HELEN: Try and be decent okay? EDDY: Hiding the cordiality of it? Speaking of cordiality you guys wanna come in for a quick libation? I'm making margaritas. I am about to drive three hours to Charlottesville. All the more reason to start drinking early. Eddy are we going? Hold on! Actually I might take you up on that. Hey let me ask you something is it just me or does that car over there look exactly like Fernando, is Fernando here? Yeah he drove me back from New York after the audition. I haven't seen him since graduation you didn't tell me he was coming. You're gonna be out of town I didn't wanna bother you with it. Well is he staying here? Mm hmm, my parents are gone for the rest of the month so I don't care. Well what is he hiding? He's upstairs sleeping. Helen it's five PM. He's a chronic napper. Yeah chronic you know. Tell me about it. EDDY: So how was your audition by the way? Eh, oh my god, you wanna go upstairs and wake him up? Eddy, what's happening? Just hold. Yeah okay. (CHUCKLES) (GOOFY MUSIC) Are we going? EDDY: Cassie. What? EDDY: Remember my friend Fernando? The one that lives in New York who I always tell you about? You mean your cousin? EDDY: Yes, right. And what about him? EDDY: He's here. Okay. EDDY: He's upstairs sleeping. You said this would be in and out. It would be in and out we'll go in for a moment, surprise him and then go out Cassie I really want you to meet him. Why is this so important to you? EDDY: Well first off he's one of the best people I know who is a guy by the way so I'm sure that'll help the point. Don't be an asshole. And secondly, he works at a really prestigious editing firm in Manhattan. You work at a really prestigious editing firm in DC. Yes, right but the difference is I'm on a three month contract and one and a half of those months is already up. So you want him to get you a job? I'd love to at least impart on him the notion that I'll be looking soon. And he's one of the best people I know. (CALM MUSIC) CASSIE: This house is all Eddy chalked it up to be. Is that so? I've elaborated. See all the guitars? Well when you got it flaunt it, that's what my mama taught me. Bet she did. Huh? Your house is huge. My parents can be a bit lavish. I can tell, it's really excessive. On three, all right, one, two. Ah! Oh shit! God you are such a jerk. All right I'm the jerk he's the one that's sneaking around my room and shit. Are these my maracas? (SMOOCHING) Off in the room and go back to a conversation we can all participate in. I see you haven't taught her Spanish. HELEN: Barely ever shows his face anymore. Seriously Cassandra, it really is wonderful to finally meet you I feel like I already know you. How's that? Well you're all anyone ever hears out of this one while you're away he pines for you on a very constant very annoying basis. CASSIE: I seriously doubt that. He's not lying. You guys sticking around or what? Sadly no, I gotta get my boo over here to school. Come on, give me 10 minutes I'll get dressed, I'll meet you downstairs, come on. Yeah, I'm making margaritas. He's driving. I'm driving. I'll make you a virgin. Like surgery? Yeah Helen that doesn't work on a man. HELEN: I hate you both. Fine, but we need to be back on the road in like 10 minutes. Come on, I'll show you the house. Come on I was just getting naked. Bunch of prudes. The family room. The usual furnishings. And, the kitchen, I think we can all grasp the basic concept here. And, when in Rome, you guys want a snack? What are you grabbing? HELEN: Your favorite. Then yes, a Klondike bar will do. You're a Klondike bar, hey you want anything? I'm fine. Are you sure? Oh I have some awesome beef jerky do you like beef jerky? I'm a vegetarian. Right. Eddy, first to jerk finish dessert? Klondike bar will do. You okay? Fine. You sure? Yes, enjoy your snacks. I'm so glad she knows so much about you. Seriously? It was real nice. What? I don't know why you think it's okay to throw around sexual innuendos in front of your girlfriend, but it's not. It's a stupid joke. Here you go, I brought you some dried fruit and no Klondikes left unfortunately. To the basement. Come on. (GENTLE MUSIC) HELEN: Ta da. Pretty cool right? Do you leave these lights on all the time? Yeah, why? It's pretty wasteful. Of what? CASSIE: Energy. Oh, right, well we just started composting so we figured it balances out our enviro karma. EDDY: It's getting cold. HELEN: Yeah you've never properly acclimated to any climate north of the equator. EDDY: I'm hot-blooded. HELEN: Can't change blood. EDDY: Or cultural association. HELEN: So where are you from again Cassie? CASSIE: Marin County. HELEN: That's like San Francisco right? CASSIE: More or less. HELEN: So what does that make you? CASSIE: In regards to what? HELEN: Your blood. Maybe like you're mild-blooded or moderate-blooded. CASSIE: I don't get it. EDDY: Well 'cause it's always so balmy in California you're not hot-blooded but you're also not cold-blooded. HELEN: Oh you might have nice dry breezy blood. EDDY: Refreshing blood. HELEN: This is starting to sound like a Twilight porno. EDDY: HBO already made that show. (GIGGLING) Where's the bathroom? It's right back there. Are you guys really composting? Fuck no, but she was about to hand me over to Green Peace I had to say something. I'm sorry she can be a little ideological sometimes. My god why does she hate me? She doesn't hate you. She's teeming with hate, it's practically oozing out of her. It's very ornate but it's not true, she thinks you're great. HELEN: Jeez you are fast. I was using a tissue. HELEN: Hope you recycled it. When's your cousin coming down? HELEN: Why are you in such a rush? We got a really late start on the day so we just wanna get moving. HELEN: Okay. But you can't leave without seeing the coolest part of the house. I'm so excited. HELEN: This room pretty much explains itself. Insane sound system. (UPBEAT MUSIC) GROUP: Cheers. I missed you guys. You didn't put too much of this right I'm driving in like 20 minutes. It's practically virgin. FERNANDO: Also practically unlike you. HELEN: Rude. I'm just saying I didn't know you could spawn such missives. I can spawn you a punch in the face. Ah, so Eddy how's the politics going? It's good, it's lucrative for the time being. And the culprit of why he never shows his face anymore. The hours are nuts, you know editing political commercials is sort of an indefatigable process. Mudslinging is a business that never sleeps. Sort of like drug trafficking. EDDY: In essence. That's what I like about you Eddy, you realize what you're doing is partisan and borderline reprehensible but you follow through with it. When put in those terms I'm not exactly sure it's a commendable trait. I think he means I have no illusions about me. That is what you mean right? Exactly. Your boyfriend has always been far more eloquent than I which is why I work in editing scripted television whereas he has to pull sort of from real life. Eddy told me that you worked in reality TV. Exactly, scripted television. One works in reality TV, one in political advertisement, both scripted, fake, and exercise about the same amount of influence and bad vibes. You know now that she says it we're not so different are we? The difference is stability, yeah reality TV is banding about year round whereas I can only land this gig every two year election cycle. FERNANDO: I didn't know you were on contract. I'll be out of work one week after we vote on the next batch of loonies to run this country. That's not what you think about the people you make commercials for is it? Because I agree. EDDY: I believe I'm batting for the right team. And by the right team I don't mean a team on the right. Oh Democrats. You could call it a Democrat, I like to think of myself as a human being. Ouch, listen just because my parents make a lot of money and they don't wanna give half their loot to the IRS does not make me a bad person for supporting their Conservative values. No I'm cool look I believe in God as much as the next Latino but voting to the right lacks logic. I second that. I think. What are your political affiliations Cassandra? Yeah you can tell us this is a safe place. I don't really have any. I don't believe in politics I think it's stupid. Ah come on, you gotta believe in something. CASSIE: I do, I believe in the earth. You're from San Francisco. CASSIE: More or less. Marin County. How'd you ever pair up with Eddy? What's that supposed to mean? Well didn't you almost do that enviro internship for your minor the LA on the Hill one? Yeah I was working with congressmen on green legislation I never actually took it. It was a nice effort. More like a nice gesture. What? I'm all about enviro policy. Whoa whoa you're already a theater major you can't get too Liberal on your parents or they might disown you. I just don't think that the Hill is going to do anything of worth until people start recognizing what the environment problem actually means. Eh it has a voice. It's just a day to day concern for me. People waste and waste and they're presented with the facts, but they don't do anything about it because they feel as if they won't make a difference when this is our world that we're talking about. For us, for our children. I know you're anti the Hill but you'd make a great politician. She's got zeal. And more and more evidence continues to ratify the existence of global warming and yet people equate it with it getting a little hotter outside. That's not what it means? See? I'm fucking with you it's the crux from an Al Gore film. The point is is that weather has nothing to do with climate change, and politics has nothing to do with global action. This is our planet that we're talking about and if we don't put forth the extra effort into taking care of it like turning off the lights when you're not using them or investing in solar energy then we're all contributing to the eventual decay of our planet. (CLAPPING) Wow. Amazing. Sorry. I'm a little out of breath. This margarita's really strong. EDDY, HELEN, AND FERNANDO: Hey! To shorter showers and lasting friendships. (UPBEAT MUSIC) This wasn't so bad. Mis amigos, listen it's been swell and all that but it's about time we. (THUNDER BOOMING) The hell was that? (RAIN POURING) Helen. What was in those margaritas? Oh my god. Global warming bro. (THUNDER BOOMING) No, no, no. But it was such a nice day out. Northern Virginia has the most fickle weather ever. Almost parallels its political climate. FERNANDO: Nice. Thank you. You know Eddy right now is not exactly the time for jokes. What are we gonna do? What do you mean? She means you can't drive in that. Exactly. Whoa were we on the same page there? We'll just wait it out. We understood each other. Helen right now is not exactly the time for jokes. Some random cloud passing through you know those hugely run the course very quickly right? Yeah it should let up soon. VOICEOVER: This storm is not letting up anytime soon. Heavy winds and more clouds are coming in from the northwest and we're expecting things to get even worse. Be sure to stay inside and keep off of the roads until this thing passes. Oh my god. Damn it. No, no, no. All right guys this is fine all right don't sweat it, I have plenty of rooms if it comes to that. And let's be serious what are weathermen notorious for? Sunny dispositions? They're known for being wrong. I think I'm getting a headache. It's probably the margarita you want an Advil or something? No I'm fine. You sure? Yes, I like to watch what I put in my body. So that makes one of you. Would you stop punching me in the same arm I have two here you know. Let me know whatever you need. I have weed. I do. You wanna lay down for a bit? I'm gonna take her up to the guest bedroom. Okay mi casa es su casa. And I'm not being trite by saying that only culturally participant. Come on let's go. You can just you know push my shit off the bed don't worry about that. You feel better gringita. (RAIN POURING) CASSIE: This is a disaster. EDDY: A natural one. Don't be an asshole right now. EDDY: It's not so bad. Of all the places to get stuck. We could've gotten stuck in that and be pulled off the road somewhere right now. This is worse. And by this you mean the beautiful mansion stocked full of food, comfort, and good company. Why is this happening to me? Well pass, we got a late start on the day anyways, we'll pass and we'll go. I'm tired I just wanna sleep. Take a nap. You know I did recently read about a new purported cure for headaches and the best part is that it's all natural. What's that? Passionate and spontaneous fornication. You read this. Yes. Where? Dr. Oz. That's a TV show. Right I can't recall at the moment but it was a credited scientific journal written by environmentalists and vegetarians that really know their shit. You wanna have spontaneous and passionate fornication right here? That incendiary chemical reaction you sparked earlier has an awful afternoon. And I'm trying to help your head. Trying to help your own head. Oh you're quick. I suppose having sex in the house would be a good fuck you to Helen. Just about all you need too. All right but I forgot my pill last night so you have to use a condom. That's fine by me. (UPBEAT JAZZ MUSIC) I like her. You do not like her. You don't like her. Oh I don't like her? You said it not me. So do you like her or not? I like her just fine, she's a pain in the ass yeah but I can tell why Eddy's into her. He's more than into her, she's a distraction. All women are distractions. HELEN: That's not true. FERNANDO: That may be the only true thing in this world. I would never be a distraction to any significant other. I would be supportive. FERNANDO: Yeah but you're a bit of an anomaly. HELEN: And how so? FERNANDO: Well you're a driven person and driven people don't fall into male or female distracted categories they just fall into driven people which you are in which case you'll never be a distraction you'll only get distracted. Eddy's a driven person. FERNANDO: Exactly. And Cassandra distracts him. FERNANDO: Yeah but she's got fire to her. Eddy's always been attracted to women like that, and me too I guess. They're just so different. Every time I've seen them together they seem like complete opposites you know? FERNANDO: I think he's doing all right for himself. He wants to be in New York. FERNANDO: Who doesn't wanna be in New York? You get to be. Have you even been auditioning down here you just keep coming up to Manhattan. The audition yesterday was my first one since college. I'm conflicted on whether I wanna try to break into the DC theater scene or if I just wanna go back to New York. FERNANDO: Sounds like Eddy's suffering the same ambivalence. Eddy's suffering Cassandra. (EDDY GRUNTING) (PANTING) We have had sex everywhere. Seriously. We're passionate. We are not lacking in that department. And I think you've spoiled me for all other women. I mean it. You too. For all other women. That's very funny. I'm funny. I may not engage in jokes that are about politics or music but I'm very funny. Again? No. No only 'cause I don't think a recovery time that's quite as physically possible but know that mentally I'm all over you. I hope so. What's that supposed to mean? Just means that I hope that I stimulate something besides your hormones that we connect on a deeper more intellectual level. I don't think we can connect any deeper than we just connected about 45 seconds ago. I'm serious. I love you for you. For your mind as well as your body. Wait, wait earlier when I said we were passionate you said we're not lacking in that department, do you think we're lacking in connecting with each other? CASSIE: I want you to love me for me not for how good we are mutually in bed. EDDY: That's not the case, all right? We're stuck in this storm. There's no one I'd rather be stuck with. Stop taking this fucking condom off. Fucking hate condoms. What are you doing? EDDY: Flushing it down the toilet. No don't flush it down the toilet. EDDY: I don't wanna throw it in the trash can leave evidence. So don't flush it, if you don't ruin the plumbing you'll further pollute. EDDY: So what should I do with it then? Give it to me. EDDY: If you say so. I'll recycle it. You coming back down? No I think I'm gonna take a shower. Isn't it dangerous to take showers during thunderstorms? I hope so. Well that was dark. You don't think Helen will mind? Take a shower. (SMOOCHING) (CALM MUSIC) (THUNDER BOOMING) (WATER RUNNING) How was the misses? VOICEOVER: She's feeling better, she's upstairs taking a shower. Oh I don't think there's any soap in that bathroom. Thanks for putting up with Cassie she's just a little exasperated by this whole thing. The storm or coming here? The storm. She seems like a nice girl. What's she study? EDDY: Biology. Could've guessed that one. Well enough about my escapades, what's up with you lately? Lately, not my dick. You know I was wondering when you were gonna get lewd. HELEN: Becca's not as easy anymore apparently. You're still messing around with that girl? From what I observe a text every couple of hours and the occasional ring ring. New York, barrage me with stories of late nights and crazy. New York is unreal. It really is. You know Helen spends half her time here in DC and half her time wishing she was back in New York like when we were in school. She goes into this hyperbolic state when she starts thinking about it, that's how you know. That's not true, it's just New York is literally the only city where people can really live you know? See what I mean? Yeah I don't blame her DC is nice, it's clean but... EDDY: But what? It's lame. It's an important city. I don't know why you insist on holding her back. I mean she wants to live near me. You're just gonna have to deal with that. How am I in any way holding Helen back? HELEN: I'll move there eventually. You know she hasn't had a single audition this summer? Okay I'll do that eventually too. Since when am I in charge of Helen's life? It comes with the territory. Seriously, both of you need to move up and soon, I mean you're on contract after all. Yeah something to think about. It's actually something I'd like to talk to you about later. I'm just surprised you haven't done it yet. Be father from Cassie I don't know how she feels about that. Told you a distraction. A what? HELEN: Hmm? Just a second, now don't get me wrong I think Cassandra is lovely, but don't tell me at 22 years old you're starting to plan your life around this girl. (TENSE MUSIC) HELEN: Come on bring it back that belongs to me. Yeah. (DOOR CREAKING) (GROUP CHATTERING) VOICEOVER: How was your shower? There's no soap up there. VOICEOVER: I told you. I wanted to get my stuff moved in today. Hey think about it as an extra day of fun and debauchery on your last summer before senior year. True next summer won't be summer it'll be real life. Not a cynic but they have a point. HELEN: Besides, you're just in time for never have I ever, okay? What? EDDY: It's a stupid game. I know what it is, I'll sit this round out. FERNANDO: Come on gringita. You know what, I'll start. Never have I ever done coke. Yes I knew it. That was targeted and racist. You want a target I can target with the best of 'em. Never have I ever done anal. (CORK POPPING) (LAUGHING) It was a one time thing with an ex okay shut up both of you. Isn't that like a mortal sin? Hey I never claimed to be sexually conservative okay? Can I talk to you for a second? Yeah, yeah sure. All right. (IMITATING WHIP CRACKING) (GIGGLING) CASSIE: Are we really doing this? EDDY: If you wanna go I'll drive for you I'll take the risk if it makes you happy. I don't want you to feel like you're taking a risk, I want you to be comfortable doing it. Well I don't feel comfortable doing it and I don't think it's a good idea but I did promise you I'd get you to school and I'll say bye to everyone. That wasn't really the reinforcing confidence I was looking for. Well Cassie we don't have to stay here we can try and make it back to my place if you want. Really can we do that? Is it drivable? Oh Jesus. HELEN AND FERNANDO: Oh! HELEN: Power's out! FERNANDO: The power's out! HELEN: Hey the power went out. I think the power is out, really is the power out? HELEN: Yeah, wait you guys aren't thinking about leaving are you? Well we can't... We can't drive in this we're gonna have to stay. Really? Yeah. Cassandra this is a really good idea. Really I couldn't tell by the ear to ear grin on your face, could yoU be a little less bummed Eddy. Cassandra. Sorry. You don't have to be sorry. So it's officially a party then. I wouldn't call it that. FERNDANDO: You're right it's a party without power might as well start stripping now because it's gonna get hot without this AC. You can go first gringita. Perfect. HELEN: I'm so glad you're staying. Both of you. Oh this can only be conducive to very sexual things. (UPBEAT DANCE MUSIC) Like old times and new times. Or to old times, you know what I mean. Cheers. Old times and new times. All the time in the world. I hate it. (UPBEAT INDIE MUSIC) EDDY: Hey hey hey hey. Stop doing that. FERNANDO: Right hand red. HELEN: Damn it. You don't even wanna play. FERNANDO: Left hand and right foot blue. Right foot blue! (LAUGHING) Salut. More more more more. Wait guys, I'm having Vujah de. EDDY: What's vujah de? It's the feeling that none of this has ever happened before. I brush my teeth I comb my hair Oh oh oh oh Are you ready? CASSIE: No. HELEN: Are you ready? CASSIE: No. HELEN: Wait but are you ready? Ask me if I'm ready one more time. Are you ready, are you ready? HELEN: Right foot. Yellow. Grab the drinks. EDDY: Yo. Guys, I found these generators in my garage and I'm thinking they can light up some of the small lights. Let's see. GROUP: Hey! EDDY: All right! (UPBEAT INDIE MUSIC) FERNANDO: Hey. Salut. You know it. How did you market that? Mm. Really strong. (UPBEAT INDIE MUSIC) (TAPPING) VOICEOVER: Damn it. VOICEOVER: Any luck? VOICEOVER: You try. (TAPPING) VOICEOVER: Nothing. VOICEOVER: Move over I thought you were useful. So, what's been the deal with men in your life? VOICEOVER: What? What's the deal with men in your life? What? You heard me. What men in my life? You haven't met anyone over the summer? I haven't been looking. You haven't been auditioning, you haven't been pursuing love interests, you're having a dormant summer. You don't spend much time with love interests last I recall. In fact a bit of a man whore, Becca, remember? You been spending a lot of time with Eddy? As much as I can, we usually go out on the weekends but he spends a lot of time at work or with Cassandra. Can I be blunt? No. If I'm being blunt I believe you need some good Spanish lovin'. Your Latino moves won't work on me. They require sensuous translation. So it's not my Latino moves you want, maybe it's something a little closer to home. Now you're just speaking Spanish. (SPEAKING IN SPANISH) Breakers are useless. (TENSE MUSIC) So what's the verdict? Is the power on? EDDY: No. Well then you can deduce the verdict. Someone's in a mood. I wish she was in a mood. I like trying some sin. Less energy, I don't hate it. Wait, that's genius. We don't need electricity for light. FERNANDO: We don't? HELEN: Candles. Let's get some candles. Hey. Come on, let's go together. FERNANDO: Is that weird for you? Is what weird for me? I can feel the air thicken just being around it I can't imagine what it's like being caught in the middle. EDDY: I don't know what you're talking about. I'm actually afraid they're not gonna make it back with those candles. Yeah I know what you're insinuating and it's not like that. FERNANDO: They hate each other. Helen doesn't have a problem with Cassandra. Okay, Eddy, I know that you love to remain blissfully ignorant and I know you've been avoiding this for years but come on. You're getting very arcane on me Fernando I'm having trouble following. She's in love with you dude. And I love her back. Wait are we talking about the same person? (TENSE MUSIC) I know there's some candles in here somewhere. You can come in you know. Sorry this room just makes me a little uncomfortable. What is it? All the angels? Yeah. HELEN: You're not religious? Nope. Well you won't get burnt if you come in I promise. I know the room's a bit garish, my parents are pretty religious. You? I believe in God. I don't know if I'm particularly rapt in the whole church aspect of it or with all the relics and stuff but yeah. I believe in God. CASSIE: Hmm. HELEN: Your parents never took you to church or anything? No they did, I was pretty involved in it when I started high school. HELEN: So what happened? The more I got involved the less I felt like I was doing anything real. The priests were all sermonizing jerks and hypocrites and I thought that people following tenants like they do is unhealthy. You've got quite the voiced opinion on this. In fact, you have quite the voiced opinion in general I've noticed. I'm not trying to offend you I just think that the world is what's really here. We're really here. Here in this house? You're right. I'm kidding, funny thing about science though is it's still all theory right I mean that's what I learned in my very basic science class. Science is science. HELEN: Candles. (TENSE MUSIC) VOICEOVER: Oh, this is cool. VOICEOVER: Yeah it's nice. VOICEOVER: And energy efficient. Guys, let's have a deep conversation, this lighting's putting me in the mood. It's about time. So what should we talk about? I have a question. (SPEAKING IN SPANISH) What? What's the question? Are any of you religious? You don't know if your own boyfriend's religious. CASSIE: I already know his confusing take on things. Well it's not confusing, I don't think this is something we should discuss. No no, this could pan out to be a great deep conversation. Can you say deep one more time but slower? Fernando. Well, Cassie and I already touched upon this briefly earlier. You did. Yeah, she saw the room with all the angels and was curious. EDDY: And what did you say? I told her I had faith but I didn't really follow Christianity too closely. I mean not for any reason against it or anything. Yeah I'd say that's a pretty common theme with God and people nowadays. You're not religious are you gringita? CASSIE: No. I think it's fair to say I think our spiritual upbringing definitely contributed to our ideologies, not to undermine it but we were exposed to it a lot. I forgot you guys are cousins. I didn't know why I wouldn't think that you had similarly aligned beliefs. Well we're not actually cousins. What do you mean? Well we're Spanish cousins you know we're not related but our families were so close we just decided to call it so. Seriously? EDDY: It's a Spanish thing. Apparently everything's a Spanish thing. I'm not a Spanish thing. I'm a purely American thing just like you sister. I'm not a thing. My family descends from Ireland. Yeah so does mine. So does everyone's. You ever notice that everybody's Irish nowadays? I mean I just say I'm American, I think at one point in time people are just gonna have to accept that this is where their family derives from. Just as they had to do with Ireland or any other country for that matter. You're a trendsetter. I know. Hallelujah. My family's only a few generations out. Don't take me too seriously, I'm drunk. Amen. EDDY: Helen? HELEN: Yeah. EDDY: Is that your dad's new guitar? HELEN: Oh yeah I forgot to show you earlier. Can I go play it? Go for it dude. I believe I should join you in this endeavor. So, tell me things. Like what? HELEN: Like who are you? I mean you're dating my best friend after all. I like to think that I'm dating my best friend too. Well he really loves you, I can tell you that much. Thanks, I know, you don't have to. And I admire you for handling him. He's a bit much sometimes. How do you mean? Come on, the guy can barely dress himself. He is kind of a mama's boy. I remember when he told me that he couldn't even do his own laundry. He still can't. (LAUGHING) Yeah. (CALM GUITAR PLUCKING) How is it? VOICEOVER: It's amazing. Yeah like a Zafteg woman. What's up with you're more lecherous than normal today. Can I be serious with you for a second? By all means. I have not gotten laid in like four months. Matter of fact I haven't really been doing that well for a while. EDDY: Really? Really. Well what happened, what about Becca? It's like you graduate college and suddenly all the girls are the exact opposite of the way they used to be. Like you remember I was like El Ray in school. No I think you're being a bit hyperbolic now but you did all right as I recall. Everyone wants boyfriends, everyone wants commitments, who wants commitments at our age? Youth is for fun and exploration last time I checked. Listen I know you've got a good heart but can I be honest? Go for it. How do I put this? I think it's your perpetual toil with sublimating these sort of libertine ideals that maybe worked out for you in college when things were freer and less defined but now... But now in the real world things are more defined? Bullshit. Field's bigger, things are harder. And people want security to counterbalance that. Even if it's more on the artificial side. You eloquent mother fucker. (GUITAR PLUCKING) (LAUGHING) Oh you two have fun in there? (LAUGHING) What's going on here? Oh are you kidding me? Well the candles are formally lost. I got an idea. Power's back let's take advantage of it everyone come on, bring the guitar. Enough with the Spanish! VOICEOVER: Gosh! Oh my god, oh my god. (SPEAKING IN SPANISH) VOICEOVER: Was I right or was I right? All right we haven't done this in a while so do not judge. But seriously though. Hey, you okay? Fine. We're just playing a song together. CASSIE: I know, and I trust you. Remember? Yeah I think. It's been a while. I know. (GENTLE GUITAR STRUMMING) Every mornin' Every evening Ain't we got fun Not much money Oh but honey Yeah we got fun The rent's unpaid dear And we haven't a car But anyway dear We'll stay as we are Even if we owe the grocer Ain't we got fun Tax collector's getting closer Ain't we got fun There's nothing surer The rich get rich and the poor get poorer In the meantime in between time Ain't we got fun Every mornin' Ain't we got fun Not much money oh But honey Ain't we got fun The rent's unpaid dear And we haven't a bus But smiles were made dear Oh for people like us Even if we owe that grocer Ain't ain't we got fun Tax collector's getting closer Still we got fun There's nothing surer The rich get rich and the poor get poorer In the meantime In between time Ain't we Got Fun Fun Ain't Ain't Ain't we got fun (GUITAR RINGS OUT) (SOMBER MUSIC) VOICEOVER: Oh my god I love you guys. Helen, come. As you wish master. I don't know why you guys didn't like seriously pursue music you're so good. 'Cause Eddy's lazy, I kept trying to goad him into songwriting but he never would. There's ample time yet we're only 22. I think I wanna go lay down upstairs. You okay? Yeah I just think I drank too much. You did look a little thirsty in there. You need to throw up? No I just need to lay down. Come on I'll walk you up. I can manage. I should follow her. Story of my life. EDDY: Wait up. Go back downstairs. Let me help you. CASSIE: I don't want your help. Baby come on. CASSIE: Don't baby come on me. Just go back downstairs and help yourself. EDDY: Why are you acting like this? CASSIE: I said drop it. EDDY: It's usually the result of drinking. Don't be an asshole Eddy. I'm not trying to be. I'm gonna go lay down okay? Cassie. Wait, wait this is Helen's room. (CHALK SCRATCHING) I think you should come back to New York with me. Oh yeah? Yeah. You can stay at my place, I'll return the favor. It's tempting. Come on, you don't have any commitments here you don't have any plans, you need to be auditioning, I can't think of a single reason why not. I don't know if I'm ready to go back to New York yet. Don't you miss theater? Yeah of course I do. But you know, DC's the third biggest theater market in the country so. It's nothing like New York and you know that. Yeah I know. It's Eddy isn't it? What? You don't wanna go back to New York without Eddy, and now with Cassandra starting school up again you think you can get things back to the good old days. You won't be there so it won't be like the good old days. Well I'm here now. (POOL BALLS CLACKING) Nice shot. I'm very perceptive aren't I? HELEN: You're pontificating. You don't like it? Hey, let go man, you're drunk. Sorry beautiful. (POOL BALLS CLACKING) And you're not being perceptive. There you are. I'm sorry that I can't play a musical instrument and that I can't engage in post college discussions and that I don't know anything about politics. Stop it. I'm sorry. Cassandra it's fine you don't have to be sorry. You do love me right? You really gotta stop asking me that. (THUNDER BOOMING) (CALM MUSIC) VOICEOVER: Not everybody has our tolerance. That's not something to boast. Life is for boasting and toasting my friend. If you don't do it now, you'll wish you had later. Cheers to that. (CHUCKLES) (GLASSES CLINKING) (THUNDER BOOMING) I don't know why but I feel like this storm is happening for a reason. Oh boy. I'm serious. There's something bigger here that we're just not aware of. The time grows nigh Eddy, the Spaniard soothsayer said so. I'm afraid Cassandra isn't as illusive about this storm as you are. She's not very illusive about a lot of things is she? She's creative just in a different way. FERNANDO: She's not an artist. She doesn't do art. Not everyone does. That is what makes her innately different from you. You're an artist, she's a scientist. At your core, those two discrepancies are the cause of your relationship problems. Relationship problems? Who says we have relationship problems? Listen I'm only throwing in my two cents here but things do seem kinda tense between you two from time to time. Listen, I think she's lovely, you know that. But you need to realize how different you are from each other. Ideologically, and the things you... Okay I don't need you to analyze my relationship that you know nothing about. Right you are. Which is why I think I will focus on something I do know something about. I am drunk and I am calling Becca. Okay, go call trollop town I hope it'll be a good libido booster for you. Well you know what 22 that's all I'm good for. (SMOOCHING) Wise words from a strange Latino. You think so. I like to at least. I think he's kind of into you. Fernando? No no, best friend remember? That doesn't mean anything. Yeah you're telling me. (PHONE RINGING) Come on come on. Come on please pick up. VOICEOVER: Hello? FERNANDO: Hey, bonita. VOICEOVER: What's up? Just calling to say hi. VOICEOVER: Are you drunk? FERNANDO: Yeah, a little, a little bit. VOICEOVER: Great. I miss you. Did you hear what I said, I said I missed you. VOICEOVER: Look Fernando, I'm at home watching a movie right now, okay? No you're not, why don't you just wanna talk to me? VOICEOVER: Fernando this has gotta stop. (LAUGHING) Hey can I ask you a question? Shoot. Okay but it's not a question I've asked before and it's kinda personal. That's really portentous I would say. HELEN: So you're giving me the green light? Since when do you ask me if you can ask a question, just ask it. Okay. Why Cassandra? Uh. I'm sorry if I'm prying but you gave me the go ahead. No no that's not prying it's just a question between best friends right? So we're still best friends? There's no one I'd rather be stuck in a storm with. (GLASSES CLINKING) Okay so now it's my prerogative to know since you've reaffirmed my best friend status. Well can I ask you a question? Yeah. Why do you even have to ask? I'm gonna be blatant with you. You guys are like yin and yang. I'm serious. You're so different from one another and I have a suspicion that it makes you miserable and that I don't know, you're only with her to please her or something. My turn to be honest? Please. I think I have a particular proclivity for becoming attracted to women I'm not particularly compatible with. Doesn't that make you miserable? A bit frustrated sometimes, sure, but I don't know despite all these mental things that repulse me or upset me I can't help but feel this sort of magnetism. You're referring to Cassandra? I have the sensational pull towards her and I know she feels it for me too. It's why we work. You think she's hot. You can't claim to love someone just because you're physically attracted to them. No I know but it's not just that it's something animalistic you know and not logical at all. It's something that definitely has to be there if I'm gonna commit to any woman and if we're talking physically it definitely has to be there or else my friend here doesn't like to perform so well. Are you serious? Back in college I got with some beautiful women right and you would always wonder why I didn't go all the way with them. I did not wonder. You would ask questions. I wondered a little. They all really bored me. They bored you sexually? Not exclusively but yeah you know there wasn't that passion, there wasn't that intrinsic connection that I only feel with a few others. But like I said it's not all about sex. I think what it comes down to is feelings aren't tangible, they're not logical, they just are. I feel for Cassandra. I don't get what I have to do to prove to you that I want you back I need you I want it to be just like the old times. VOICEOVER: Well that was a long time ago Fernando and I'm sorry but you blew it. I don't wanna be mean to you. I just wanna be better, I'm trying, I really am. I'm trying to seek penance here. VOICEOVER: Well you need to seek somebody else so stop calling. (PHONE BEEPS) (CALM MUSIC) VOICEOVER: Let's do a shot, come on. Are you serious? VOICEOVER: Dead. Dead is what I'm gonna be if I keep doing shots. Remember when you and I used to drink all night and then drink some more? I recall but the difference was we were dancing you know, firm believer that if you're dancing you can drink all you want. Well then let's dance. What? Yeah, first we'll do a shot, and then we'll dance. I don't know, I'm getting pretty tired. HELEN: Then you need a shot to pick you up. Alcohol's a depressant. You're being a depressant, come on. One shot now, one shot after we dance. Listen I'll do the shot but I don't think dancing is such a good idea. HELEN: Why not? You know why not. Salut. (BURPING) (CALM MUSIC) (STEREO BEEPING) (UPBEAT SAMBA MUSIC) Come on, you're not gonna indulge me for this one? I don't know. HELEN: We haven't had just us time in forever, you remember how much fun we used to be? We'll see having all space respect. Yeah well I learned from the best. Let's go. (UPBEAT SAMBA MUSIC) (LAUGHING) (SLAPPING) Oh my god that was so much fun. Haven't danced like that in forever. Oh I love this song. (ROMANTIC MUSIC) Yeah I think it's funny that my Latino musical taste comes from old songs like this that my parents listened to and that's where your taste comes from. Introduce us to new things. (ROMANTIC MUSIC) Oh my god. Oh fuck I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry. Oh my god what the hell are you, oh my god. I was tucking you in. What? I'm sorry you looked cold. I looked cold? You're not exactly wearing much. Oh my god turn around! Jesus. FERNANDO: I didn't mean to startle you. Don't apologize for startling me apologize for waking me up. I was dreaming I was out of this fucking house. Well, would a little clam suffice? It'll be our secret. You know what I'm not opposed, light it up. All right. It's been a really long time since I've smoked. Eddy doesn't like you smokin' huh? It's not that he would ever tell me not to do it, it's that I feel like he'd be judging me if I did. You're not alone there. He and Helen always give me shit for it. CASSIE: I much prefer it to drinking. You're not alone there either, cheers. (LIGHTER CLICKING) Better than drinking? (COUGHING) Much. Although I admit I'm still a little drunk. Is it redundant of I say you're not alone there again? CASSIE: Yes. Do you wanna shotgun? I'm gonna get really high. You're already drunk it'll just help soften the edges instead of violently shaking them around. My head doesn't really spin when I drink. No? No I just get really sleepy. (EXHALING) Yep, really high. You just get sleepy. CASSIE: Mm. You a throw up person or a blackout person? CASSIE: What? Well you know some people drink too much and throw up others drink too much and blackout. You're either one or the other I'm assuming you're the latter since your head doesn't spin. Yeah I guess I'm more of a blackout person I don't really drink that often. Well you are marrying into an alcoholic family let me tell ya that. Between Eddy and Helen and me it gets pretty crazy. Please do not refer to Helen as family please. I'm sorry. I'm a throw up person myself. I like to smoke a little bit before I drink it usually helps level me out. Hey, gringita, one more shotgun. CASSIE: You know, I don't appreciate you calling me gringita I know what it means. FERNANDO: I'm just messing with ya. I know. Come on, don't be a loafer, if you're gonna smoke with me you gotta put some effort into it. Come on, shotgun. - CASSIE: All right. - Okay. (ROMANTIC MUSIC) Oh my god! Oh my god. Oh my god. I'm sorry, no. Oh my god Eddy, Eddy! FERNANDO: Sorry I'm high I'm... Eddy! No just... Ah. (ROMANTIC MUSIC) Eddy. Did I bore you? (ROMANTIC MUSIC) Wait Cassie, hold on, it's not what it... (ROMANTIC MUSIC) Cassandra? How was that for you? That's what you want isn't it? You can have it all, it'd be so easy. Brains and beauty I'm giving it to you. No no no no, but we were just dancing, just dancing. Damn it I'm hungry. I'm progressive, I can hang with the gang, I can do wild and crazy things and I can be funny. I can do it all for you. What the fuck is going on Helen? I'm a great girlfriend. And you all are fucking nuts and you're incestuous and this is wrong. What is happening in my life right now? Oh well I am upstairs being harassed you two are embracing each other's harassment and it's fucking disgusting. Just slow down. What do you mean you're upstairs getting harassed? Oh your cousin or your friend or your brother whatever the fuck he is was up there kissing me. What? He had his tongue down my throat. How do you like that Eddy? Oh my god. Yeah. Wait. (INTENSE MUSIC) VOICEOVER: Fernando. Fernando! Fernando open the door! VOICEOVER: Oh I'm sorry man I'm fine. Open the fucking door now! What the fuck is wrong with you man? HELEN: Stop! VOICEOVER: My arm! Stop stop stop stop. Get off, since when do you fight people Eddy? EDDY: Hey maybe I overreacted. CASSIE: React his tongue was down my throat! EDDY: Will you chill out for once? Oh what the fuck is that? EDDY: Jesus. Is that a condom fuck? Cassie I thought you said you threw it out! CASSIE: Yeah whatever. Did you just fuck in my house? EDDY: There's no soap in this bathroom. Eddy. Yeah what's the big deal it's the guest bedroom. What's the big deal? What just 'cause it's not my room doesn't mean it doesn't fucking effect me. We didn't have sex in your room. Why'd you say it like that? Did you try? We didn't have a condom so we didn't have sex. You are a real piece of shit sometimes. CASSIE: Turn off the shower you're wasting water! FERNANDO: You turn it off. CASSIE: Oh my god! EDDY: What the fuck was that? I don't know the shower like exploded or something. EDDY: Didn't I tell you not to take a shower during a thunderstorm? Oh my god! (BREATHING HEAVILY) Okay. Yes, I kissed your girlfriend out of some sad base inclination that I just had your spunk in my face. EDDY: That is a deliberate insult you jealous fuck. I'm the jealous one. You don't think I notice your subtle deal over my position in life. Your position in life? You're a debased pig. What sort of position is that? Not my job man. You know that you would rather be in New York living it up than stuck here in northern Virginia with a girl. HELEN: Hey this is my fucking house. CASSIE: He's my fucking boyfriend. HELEN: Yeah, yeah great. CASSIE: Get off me! HELEN: Stupid bitch. (SHOUTING OVER EACH OTHER) In my own god damn house. CASSIE: Are you serious? EDDY: Hey hey hey hey, hey hey hey! Hey Jesus! Get the fuck off me! What the fuck is wrong with you? (CERAMIC SHATTERING) Shit. You're all crazy. Cassie. Hey you and your fucking fake cousins and your fucking fake friendships and your fucking fake religion and you brought me into all of it. I'll clean this up man just go get her. Yeah go get her. Break me but fucking chase her. What? Just go. (SOMBER MUSIC) (THUNDER BOOMING) VOICEOVER: Cassandra! What are you doing? You know what Spanish people aren't the only race that call close friends cousins. What? Everyone does that. EDDY: I know. What do you want from this? I wanna make it work with you, I wanna be near you. CASSIE: In New York? It's there it's something I think about. And Helen? Is my best friend. I thought I was your best friend. You are but she is too in a different way. New York, Helen, it's all the same thing Eddy. Allegiance, you think I had that you turn into conflict with me is a figment of your imagination. They're not illusions and they're not figments of my imagination they're repressions. You repress your feelings for her and you focus on what's here and now. Me, a job in DC, I can see it it's palpable. What are you talking about? Let's forget about all this shit. You're a liar Eddy. Maybe not in a traditional sense but you lied. You lie to yourself you lie about your feelings and you lie about what you want and you lie about me. And it's having a domino effect on everyone around you. I'm not lying about you. I fucking love you. I don't know what I feel right now. And I don't have to lie and say that I love you back. Because I can admit that. (WATER SPLASHING) (SOMBER MUSIC) VOICEOVER: This storm turned hurricane is now completely out of hand. We expect the worst. Currently heading towards the southeast coast and slowly dissipating. Can you turn it up? I can't really hear it. VOICEOVER: It'll mainly damage this area Lockwood but not in less of a range. Cassandra find the towels all right? Yeah she had one from earlier when she showered. Hmm. And Fernando? He's upstairs sleeping. You had sex in my house. I know. It was rude. It's not unlike you. I gave you your charger right? Yeah, put it in the car. She distracts you. I know. You distract me. Sorry. You don't have to be sorry. (UPBEAT JAZZ MUSIC) Every morning Every evening Ain't we got fun Not much money Oh but honey Ain't we got fun The rent's unpaid dear We haven't a car But anyway dear We'll stay as we are Even if we owe the grocer Don't we have fun Tax collector's getting closer Still we have fun There's nothin' surer The rich get rich and the poor get poorer In the meantime, in between time Ain't we got fun (CALM MUSIC) And we know that we're missing out As we run in attempt to be free But we know what this love's about Still we're scared So we'll fake it But we don't hate it No no No no no And oh it's so wrong Yeah it's okay To want to feel protected Yeah I owe you so much Yeah you mean so much To me oh Do do do dum dum Do do do dum dum And I don't hey hey Oh Oh oh Oh oh oh And I'll start over and over again To the same dance Maybe hold hands Yeah the list goes on and I'll Get over get over those old fears No more shedding tears 'Cause I'm a waste of time we spent You know I can't wait to do it again And oh it's so long Oh it's okay to wanna feel protected Yeah I love you so much Yeah you mean so much To me Oh oh Do do do dum dum Da do do da da dum Do And I will start over and over again To the same dance maybe hold hands And the list goes on And I'll get over get over those old fears No more shedding tears 'Cause of the wasted time we spent You know I can't wait to do it again You know I'll be all right in the end |
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