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Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (2007)
I have sailed the world,
beheld its wonders From the Dardanelles to the mountains of Peru, But there's no place like London No, there's no place like London. Mr. Todd-? You are young. Life has been kind to you. You will learn. There's a hole in the world like a great black pit And the vermin of the world Inhabit it And its morals aren't worth what a pig could spit And it goes by the name of London. At the top of the hole sit the privileged few Making mock of the vermin in the lower zoo, turning beauty into filth and greed. I too have sailed the world, and seen its wonders For the cruelty of men is as wondrous as Peru, but there's no place like London! Is everything all right, Mr. Todd? I beg your indulgence, Anthony... My mind is far from easy. In these once familiar streets I feel shadows Shadows...? Ghosts. There was a barber and his wife, and she was beautiful. A foolish barber and his wife, she was his reason and his life, and she was beautiful, and she was virtuous. And he was... Naive. There was another man who saw that she was beautiful, A pious vulture of the law, who with a gesture of his claw removed the barber from his plate. Then there was nothing but to wait and she would fall, So soft, So young, So lost, and oh, so beautiful! And the lady, sir... did she succumb? Oh, that was many years ago... I doubt if anyone would know. I'd like to thank you, Anthony. If you hadn't spotted me, I'd be lost on the ocean still... Will I see you again? You might find me, if you like, around Fleet Street. Until then, my friend. There's a hole in the world like a great black pit and it's filled with people who are filled with shit And the vermin of the world inhabit it... A customer! Wait! What's your rush? What's your hurry? You gave me such a- Fright. I thought you was a ghost. Half a minute, can't you? Sit! Sit ye down! Sit! All I meant is that I haven't seen a customer for weeks. Did you come here for a pie, sir? Do forgive me if me head's a little vague- Ugh! What is that? But you'd think we had the plague- From the way that people- Keep avoiding- No, you don't! These are probably the worst pies in London. But there's no one comes in even to inhale- Right you are, sir. Would you like a drop of ale? Mind you, I can't hardly blame them- These are probably the worst pies in London. I know why nobody cares to take them- I should know, I make them. But good? No, the worst pies in London- Even that's polite. The worst pies in London- If you doubt it, take a bite. Is that just disgusting? You have to concede it. It's nothing but crusting- Here, drink this, you'll need it- The worst pies in London. And no wonder with the price of meat. What it is- When you get it. Never. Thought I'd live to see the day men'd think it was a treat Finding poor animals wot are dying in the street. Mrs. Mooney has a pie shop, Does a business, but I noticed something weird- Lately all her neighbors' cats have disappeared. Have to hand it to her- Wot I calls enterprise, Popping pussies into pies. Wouldn't do in my shop- Just the thought of it's enough to make you sick. And I'm telling you them pussy cats is quick. No denying times is hard, sir - Even harder than the worst pies in London. Only lard and nothing more- Is that just revolting? All greasy and gritty, it looks like it's molting, And tastes like- Well, pity a woman alone with limited wind and the worst pies in London! Ah sir, times is hard. Times is hard. Trust me, dearie, it's going to take more than ale to wash that taste out. Come with me and we'll get you a nice tumbler of gin. Isn't this homey now? Me cheery wallpaper was a real bargain too, it being only partly singed when the chapel burnt down... There's a good boy, now you sit down and warm your bones, Isn't that a room over the shop? If times are so hard, why don't you rent it out? Up there? Oh, no one will go near it... People think it's haunted. Haunted? And who's to say they're wrong?... You see, years ago, something happened up there. Something not very nice... There was a barber and his wife, and he was beautiful, a proper artist with a knife, but they transported him for life. And he was beautiful... Barker, his name was - Benjamin Barker. Transported? What was his crime? Foolishness. He had this wife, you see, pretty little thing, silly little nit. Had her chance for the moon on a string- Poor thing. Poor thing. There was this Judge, you see, wanted her like mad. Every day hed send her a flower, but did she come down from her tower? Sat up there and sobbed by the hour, Poor fool. Ah, but there was worse yet to come, poor thing. The Beadle calls on her, all polite, poor thing, poor thing. The Judge, he tells her, is all controlled, he blames himself for her dreadful plight She must come straight to his house tonight! Poor thing, poor thing. Of course, when she goes there, poor thing, poor thing, they're having this ball all in masks. There's no one she knows there, poor dear, poor thing. She wanders tormented, and drinks, poor thing. The Judge has repented, she thinks, poor thing. Oh, where is Judge Turpin? She asks. He was there, all right- Only not so contrite! She wasnt no match for such craft, you see, And everyone thought it so droll. They figured she had to be daft, you see, So all of em stood there and laughed, you see, Poor soul! Poor thing! ...NOOOOOO! Would no one have mercy on her? So it is you - Benjamin Barker. Where's Lucy?! Wheres my wife?! She poisoned herself. Arsenic from the apothecary on the corner. I tried to stop her but she wouldn't listen to me. And he's got your daughter. He? Judge Turpin? Adopted her like his own. Fifteen years of sweating in a living hell on a false charge. Fifteen years dreaming that I might come home to find a loving wife and child... Well, I can't say the years have been particularly kind to you, Mr. Barker, but you still- No, not Barker. That man is dead. It's Todd now. Sweeney Todd... And he will have his revenge. Come in! Nothing to be afraid of, love. When they came for the girl, I hid 'em. I hid just some of 'em. Those handles is chased silver, ain't they? Silver, yes... These are my friends, see how they glisten. See this one shine, how he smiles in the light. My friend, my faithful friend. Speak to me friend, Whisper, I'll listen. I know, I know- You've been locked out of sight all these years- Like me, my friend. Well, I've come home To find you waiting. Home, and we're together, and we'll do wonders, won't we? You there, my friend, - I'm your friend too, Mr. Todd, come, let me hold you. - If you only knew, Mr. Todd. Now, with a sigh - Oh, Mr. Todd, you're warm in my hand, - My friend, - You've come home. - My clever friend. - Always had a fondness for you, i did. Rest now, my friends. - Never you fear, Mr. Todd, Soon I'll unfold you. - you can move in here, Mr. Todd. Soon you'll know splendors you never have dreamed all your days... will be yours. - My lucky friends. I'm your friend too. - Till now your shine I think they shine beautiful. - was merely silver. Silver's good enough for me, Mr. Todd. - Friends, you shall drip rubies, You'll soon drip precious rubies... Leave me... At last my arm is complete again. Green finch and linnet bird, nightingale, blackbird, how is it you sing? How can you jubilate, sitting in cages, never taking wing? Outside the sky waits, beckoning, beckoning, just beyond the bars. How can you remain, staring at the rain, maddened by the stars? How is it you sing anything? How is it you sing? My cage has many rooms, damask and dark. Nothing there sings, not even my lark. Larks never will, you know, when they're captive. Teach me to be more adaptive. Green finch and linnet bird, nightingale, blackbird, Teach me how to sing. If I cannot fly, let me sing. Alms!... Alms!... For a miserable woman on a miserable chilly morning... Thank you, sir, thank you. Maam, could tell me whose house this is? Thats the great Judge Turpins house, that is. And the young lady who resides there? Thats Johanna, his pretty little ward. Keeps her snug, he does, all locked up... So dont you go trespassing there or its a good whipping for you or any other young man with mischief on his mind... Alms!... Alms!... For a desperate woman... I feel you, Johanna. I feel you. I was half convinced I'd waken, Satisfied enough to dream you. Happily I was mistaken, Johanna! I'll steal you, Johanna. I'll steal you... Come in, lad. Come in... ...you were looking for Hyde Park, you say? Yes, it's terribly large on the map but I keep getting lost... Sit down, lad, sit down. It's embarrassing for a sailor to lose his bearings, but, well, there you are. A sailor, eh? Yes, sir. The "Bountiful" out of Plymouth. A sailor must know the ways of the world, yes? Must be practiced in the ways of the world... Would you say you are practiced, boy? Sir? Oh, yes... such practices... the geishas of Japan... the concubines of Siam, the catamites of Greece, the harlots of India... I have them all here... Drawings of them. All the vile things you've done with your whores. Would you like to see? I think there's been some mistake- Oh, I think not. You gandered at my ward, Johanna. You gandered at her. Yes, sir, you gandered. I meant no harm- Your meaning is immaterial. Mark me: if I see your face again on this street, you'll rue the day you were born. Hyde Park is that way, young sir... A right and then a left, then straight on, you see? ...Over there. You heard Judge Turpin, little man. Next time it'll be your pretty brains all over the pavement. I'll steal you, Johanna. I'll steal you! Do they think that walls can hide you? Even now I'm at your window. I am in the dark beside you, buried sweetly in your yellow hair. I feel you, Johanna, and one day I'll steal you. Till I'm with you then, I'm with you there, sweetly buried in your yellow hair... He's here every Thursday. Italian. All the rage he is. Ladies and gentlemen! May I have your attention, please? Do you wake every morning in shame and despair to discover your pillow is covered with hair wot ought not to be there? Well, ladies and gentlemen, from now on you can waken at ease. You need never again have a worry or care, I will show you a miracle marvelous rare, Gentlemen, you are about to see something rot rose from the dead! On the top of my head. 'Twas Pirelli's Miracle Elixir, That's wot did the trick, sir, True, sir, true. Was it quick, sir? Did it in a tick, sir? Just like an elixir ought to do! How about a bottle, mister? Only costs a penny, guaranteed. Does Pirelli's stimulate the growth, sir? You can have my oath, sir, 'Tis unique. Rub a minute, Stimulatin', i'n it? Soon you'll have to thin it once a week! Pardon me, ma'am, what's that awful stench? - Are we standing near an open trench? - Must be standing near an open trench! Buy Pirelli's Miracle Elixir: Anything wot's slick, sir, soon sprouts curls. Try Pirelli's! When they see how thick, sir, you can have your pick, sir, of the girls! Want to buy a bottle, missus? What is this? - What is this? Smells like piss. - Smells like - phew! Looks like piss. This is piss. Piss with ink. Let Pirelli's activate your roots, sir- Keep it off your boots, sir- Eats right through. Yes, get Pirellis! Usable in all ways. Ladies seem to love it- Flies do too! I am Adolfo Pirelli, Da king of da barbers, da barber of kings, E buon giorno, good day, I blow you a kiss! And I, da so-famous Pirelli, I wish-a to know-a Who has-a da nerve-a to say My elixir is piss! Who says this?! I do. I am Mr. Sweeney Todd of Fleet Street. I have opened a bottle of Pirelli's elixir, and I say to you that it is nothing but an arrant fraud, concocted from piss and ink. And furthermore, "signor" - I have serviced no kings, yet I wager I can shave a cheek with ten times more dexterity that any street mountebank. You see these razors? I lay them against five pounds you are no match, sir. Either accept my challenge or reveal yourself as a sham. You hear zis foolish man? Now, please, you will see how he will regret his folly! Toby! Who's for a free shave? Will Beadle Bamford be the judge? Glad, as always, to oblige my friends and neighbors. Ready? Ready! Ready. The fastest, smoothest shave is the winner. Now, signorini, signori, We mix-a da lather But first-a you gather around, signorini, signori, you looking a man who have had-a da glory to shave-a da Pope. Mr. Sweeney-so-smart- Oh, I beg-a you pardon - 'll call me a lie, was-a only a cardinal- Nope! It was-a da Pope! To shave-a da face, To cut-a da hair, Require da grace Require da flair, For if-a you slip, You nick da skin, You clip-a da chin, You rip-a da lip a bit Beyond-a repair! To shave-a da face Or even a part Without it-a smart Require da heart. Not just-a da flash, it take-a panache, it take-a da passion for da art. To shave-a da face, To trim-a da beard, To make-a da bristle clean like a whistle, Dis is from early infancy da talent give to me by God! It take-a da skill, It take-a da brains, It take-a da will to take-a da pains, It take-a da pace, it take-a da graaaaaace... The winner is Todd. Sir, I bow to a skill far greater than my own. The five pounds. May the good Lord smile on you... until we meet again. Come, boy. Suppose it's just me gentle heart, but I do hate to see a boy treated like that. Congratulations, Mr. Todd. May I ask you, sir, do you have an own establishment? He certainly does. Sweeney Todd's Tonsorial Parlor - above my meat pie emporium in Fleet Street. I thank you, sir. You are a paragon of integrity. Well, I try to do my best for my friends and neighbors... Your establishment is in Fleet Street, you say? Yes, sir. Then, Mr. Todd, you will surely see me there before the week is out. You will be welcome, Beadle Bamford, and I can guarantee to give you without a penny's charge, the closest shave you will ever know. Come on, off... ...Like to give me a coronary right there! ...It's not much of a chair, but it'll do. Was me poor Albert's chair. Sat in it all day long he did, after his leg give out with the gout. Why doesn't the Beadle come? "Before the week is out," that's what he said. And who says the week's out? It's only Tuesday. Easy now. Hush, love, hush. Dont distress yourself, Whats your rush? Keep your thoughts nice and lush. Wait. Hush, love, hush. Think it through. Once it bubbles, then whats to do? Watch it close. Let it brew. Wait. Ive been thinking, flowers- Maybe daisies- To brighten up the room. Dont you think some flowers, pretty daisies, might relieve the gloom? Ah, wait, love, wait. And the Judge? When will we get to him? Can't you think of nothing else? Always broodin' away on yer wrongs what happened heaven knows how many years ago... Come on. Slow, love, slow. Time's so fast. Now goes quickly, see Now it's past! Soon will come, soon will last. Wait. Dont you know, silly man, half the fun is to plan the plan? All good things come to those who can wait. Gillyflowers, maybe, 'stead of daisies... I dont know, though... What do you think? Oh, I'm sorry, excuse me... Mrs. Lovett, sir. A pleasure, ma'am - Mr. Todd, there's a girl who needs my help, such a sad girl and lonely, and beautiful too and- Slow down, slow down. Yes, I'm sorry... This girl has a guardian who he keeps her locked away. But then this morning she dropped this... It's surely a sign that Johanna wants me to help her that's her name, Johanna - and Turpin that of her guardian. A judge of some sort... Once he goes to court, Im going to slip into the house and release her and beg her to come away with me. Tonight. Oh, this is very romantic. Yes, but- I don't know anyone in London, you see. And I need somewhere safe to bring her till I've hired a coach to take us away. If I could keep her here, just for an hour or two, I would forever be in your debt. Bring her here, love. Thank you, ma'am... ...Mr. Todd? Thank you, my friend. Seems like the fates are favoring you at last, Mr. T. What is it, love? You'll have her back before the day is out. What about him? Oh, him? Let him bring her here and then, since you're so hot for a little - that's the throat to slit, my dear. Poor little Johanna. All those years without a scrap of motherly affection. Well, we'll soon see to that... Keep the boy downstairs. Signora, is Mr. Todd at home? Plying his trade upstairs... Would you look at it, now! You wouldn't mind if I gave him a nice juicy meat pie, would yer? Yes, yes, whatever you like. Come with me now. Your teeth is strong, I hope? Sit down, Come in. Mr. Todd. Signor Pirelli. Call me Danny. Daniel Higgins' the Daniel Higgins' the name when it's not professional... I'd like me five quid back, if' n ya don't mind. Why? Because you entered into our little wager on false pretenses, me friend... And so you might remember to be more forthright in the future, you'll be handing over half your profits to me, share and share alike... ...Mr. Benjamin Barker. Here you are, tuck in. Like to see a man with a healthy appetite. Reminds me of my dear Albert, like to gorge himself to bloatation, he did. He didn't have your nice full head though- To tell the truth - it gets awful hot. ...yes, this will do very nicely... You don't remember me. Well, why should you? I was just a down and out Irish pug you hired for a couple of weeks - sweeping up hair - But I remember these - And how could I ever forget you, Mr. Barker? I used to sit right there, and dream of the day I could be a proper barber meself... You might say you was an inspiration to me. So, do we have a deal, or should I run down the street for me old pal Beadle Bamford? What do you say to that now, Mr. Sweeney T-? My my my, always work to be done. Spic-and-span, that's my motto. So, ah, how did you end up with that dreadful italian? Got me from the workhouse. Been there since I was born. Oh God! He's got an appointment with his tailor- If he's late, he'll blame me-! Wait-! Signor, you got an appointment... Signor Pirelli has been called away. You better run after him. Oh no, sir. I better wait for him here or it'll be a lashing. He's a great one for the lashings. So, hmmm, Mrs. Lovett gave you a pie, did she? She's a real lady. That she is... But if I know a growing boy, there's still room for some more pie, eh? Yes, sir. Then why don't you wait for your master downstairs? There'll be another pie in it for you, I'm sure... No, I should stay here. I tell you what... Why don't you tell Mrs. Lovett I said to give you a nice big tot of gin? Thank you, sir! This is the second time, sir, that you have been brought before this bench. Though it is my earnest wish to ever temper justice with mercy, your persistent dedication to a life of crime is an abomination before God and man. I therefore sentence you to hang by the neck until you are dead and may the Lord have mercy on your soul. This court is adjourned. Thank you, your Honor. Just the sentence we wanted. Was he guilty? Well, if he didn't do it, he's surely done something to warrant a hanging. What man has not? Sir? No matter - Come, walk home with me. I have news for you, my friend. In order to shield her from the evils of this world, I have decided to marry my dear Johanna. Ah, sir, happy news indeed. Strange, though, when I offered myself to her she showed a certain... reluctance. Excuse me, my lord, May I request, my lord, Permission, my lord, to speak? Forgive me if I suggest, my lord, You're looking less than your best, my lord, There's powder upon your vest, my lord. And stubble upon your cheek, And ladies, my lord, are weak. Stubble, you say? Perhaps at times I am a little overhasty with my morning ablutions... Fret not though, my lord, I know a place, my lord, A barber, my lord, of skill. Thus armed with a shaven face, my lord, Some eau de cologne to brace my lord And musk to enhance the chase, my lord, You'll dazzle the girl until she bows to your every will. A barber, eh? Take me to him. His name is Todd, my lord. And he is the very last word in barberin'. You ought to slow down a bit, lad. It'll go to your head. They used to give it to us at the workhouse, so's we could sleep. Not that you'd ever want to sleep in that place, ma'am. Not with the things that happen in the dark. That's nice, dear... I think I'll just pop in on Mr. Todd for a tick. You'll be all right here? Leave the bottle. Gawd, the lad is drinking me out of house and home, how long until Pirelli gets back? He won't be back. Mr. T., you didn't! You're barking mad! Killing a man wot done you no harm! He recognized me from the old days. He tried to blackmail me - half me earnings. Oh well, that's a different matter! For a moment there I thought you'd lost your marbles! Ooooh! All that blood! Poor bugger. Oh, well. Well, waste not, want not... So... What are we going to do about the boy then? Send him up. Oh, we don't need to worry about him, he's a simple thing. Send him up. Now, Mr. T., surely one's enough for today. 'Sides, I was thinking about hiring a lad to help around the shop, me poor knees not being what they used to be. All right. 'Course we'll have to stock up on the gin, the boy drinks like a Barbary sailor - The Judge. Get out. Get out! Mr. Todd? At your service... An honor to receive your patronage, my lord. You know me, sir? Who in this wide world does not know the great Judge Turpin? These premises are hardly prepossessing and yet the Beadle tells me you are the most accomplished of all the barbers in the city. That is gracious of him, sir... And what may I do for you today, sir? A stylish trimming of the hair? A soothing skin massage? Sit, sir. Sit. You see, sir, a man infatuate with love, her ardent and eager slave. So fetch the pomade and pumice stone and lend me a more seductive tone, a sprinkling perhaps of French cologne, But first, sir, I think - a shave. The closest I ever gave. You're in a merry mood today, Mr. Todd. 'Tis your delight, sir, catching fire from one man to the next. 'Tis true, sir, love can still inspire the blood to pound, the heart leap higher. What more, what more can man require- Than love, sir? More than love, sir. What, sir? Women. Ah yes, women. Pretty women. Now then, my friend. Now to your purpose. Patience, enjoy it. Revenge can't be taken in haste. Make haste, and if we wed, you'll be commended, sir. My lord... And who, may it be said, is your intended, sir? My ward. And pretty as a rosebud. Pretty as her mother? What? What was that? Oh, nothing, sir. Nothing. May we proceed? Pretty women... Fascinating... Sipping coffee, Dancing... Pretty women are a wonder. Pretty women. Sitting in the window or standing on the stair, Something in them cheers the air. Pretty women... Silhouetted... Stay within you... Glancing... Stay forever... Breathing lightly... Pretty women... Pretty women! Blowing out their candles or combing out their hair... Then they leave... Even when they leave you and vanish, they somehow can still remain there with you, they're there. Ah, pretty women... At their mirrors... In their gardens... Letter-writing... Flower-picking... Weather-watching... How they make a man sing! Proof of heaven as you're living- Pretty women, sir! Mr. Todd! I've seen Johanna! She said she'll leave with me tonight...! You! - There is indeed a higher power to warn me thus in time- Johanna elope with you? I'll make sure that neither you nor any other vile men shall ever set eyes on her again...! And as for you, barber, it is all too clear what company you keep. Service them well and hold their custom - for you'll have none of mine. Mr. Todd - you have to help me Out. - Mr. Todd, please Out. - Mr. Todd- OUT! All this shouting and running about, what's happened-? I had him - The sailor busted in, I know, I saw them both running down the street- I had him! His throat was bare beneath my hand - There, there, dear. Calm down - No, I had him! His throat was there, And he'll never come again! Easy now. Hush, love, hush. I keep telling you- - When?! What's your rush? - Why did I wait? You told me to wait! Now he'll never come again... There's a hole in the world like a great black pit and it's filled with people who are filled with shit And the vermin of the world inhabit it - But not for long! They all deserve to die! Tell you why, Mrs. Lovett, Tell you why: Because in all of the whole human race, Mrs. Lovett there are two kinds of men and only two. There's the one staying put in his proper place and the one with his foot in the other one's face- Look at me, Mrs. Lovett, Look at you - No, we all deserve to die! Even you, Mrs. Lovett, Even I. Because the lives of the wicked should be- Made brief. For the rest of us, death will be a relief- We all deserve to die! And I'll never see Johanna, No, I'll never hug my girl to me- Finished! All right! You, sir, how about a shave? Come and visit your good friend, Sweeney...! You, sir, too, sir- Welcome to the grave! I will have vengeance, I will have salvation! Who, sir? You, sir? No ones in the chair- Come on, come on, Sweeney's waiting! I want you bleeders! You, sir - anybody! Gentlemen, now don't be shy! Not one man, no, nor ten men, nor a hundred can assuage me- I will have you! And I will get him back even as he gloats. In the meantime I'll practice on less honorable throats- And my Lucy lies in ashes And I'll never see my girl again, But the work waits, I'm alive at last And I'm full of JOY! That's all very well, but what are we going to do about him? Hello? Do you hear me? Come on... Oh, you great useless thing... Sit down! There, drink it down. Now, we got a body molderin' away upstairs. what do you intend we should do about that? Later on, when it's dark, we'll take him to some secret place and bury him. Well, yes, of course, we could do that. I don't suppose he's got any relatives going to come poking around looking for him... Seems a downright shame... Shame? Seems an awful waste... Such a nice plump frame Wot's-his-name Has... Had... Has... Nor it can't be traced. Business needs a lift- Debts to be erased- Think of it as thrift, as a gift... If you get my drift... Seems an awful waste. I mean, with the price of meat what it is, When you get it, If you get it... Ah- Good, you got it. Take, for instance, Mrs. Mooney and her pie shop. Business never better, using only pussycats and toast. And a pussy's good for maybe six or seven at the most. And I'm sure they can't compare as far as taste- Mrs. Lovett, what a charming notion, eminently practical and yet appropriate as always. Well, it does seem a waste! Mrs. Lovett, how I've lived without you all these years I'll never know! - Think about it... How delectable! Also undetectable! Lots of other gentlemen'll soon be coming for a shave. How choice! How rare! - Won't they? Think of all them - Pies! For what's the sound of the world out there? What, Mr. Todd, What, Mr. Todd, what is that sound? Those crunching noises pervading the air? Yes, Mr. Todd, Yes, Mr. Todd, yes, all around. It's man devouring man, my dear, And who are we to deny it in here? Ah, these are desperate times, Mrs. Lovett, and desperate measures are called for. Here we are now, hot out of the oven... What is that? It's priest. Have a little priest. Is it really good? Sir, it's too good, at least. Then again, they don't commit sins of the flesh, so it's pretty fresh. Awful lot of fat. - Only where it sat. Haven't you got poet or something like that? No, you see the trouble with poet is, how do you know it's deceased? Try the priest. Lawyer's rather nice. If it's for a price. Order something else, though, to follow, since no one should swallow it twice. Anything thats lean. Well, then, if youre British and loyal, you might... ...might enjoy Royal Marine. Anyway, it's clean. Though, of course, it tastes of wherever it's been. Is that squire on the fire? Mercy no, sir, look closer, you'll notice it's grocer. Looks thicker. More like vicar. No, it has to be grocer - it's green. The history of the world, my love- Save a lot of graves, do a lot of relatives favors... Is those below serving those up above. Everybody shaves, so there should be plenty of flavors... How gratifying for once to know- That those above will serve those down below! What is that? It's fop. Finest in the shop. Or we have some shepherd's pie peppered With actual shepherd on top. And I've just begun. Here's a politician - so oily, it's served with a doily- Have one? Put it on a bun. Well, you never know if it's going to run. Try the friar. Fried, it's drier. No, the clergy is really too coarse and too mealy. Then actor - That's compacter. Yes, and always arrives overdone. I'll come again when you have Judge on the menu... Have charity towards the world, my pet- Yes, yes, I know, my love We'll take the customers that we can get. High,born and low, my love. We'll not discriminate great from small. No, we'll serve anyone- Well serve anyone- And to anyone at all! So it's true. Sir... A gentlemen knocks before entering a lady's room. Indeed he does... But I see no lady. I told myself the sailor was lying... That my Johanna would never betray me. Never hurt me so. Sir... I will leave this place. I think that only appropriate. Since you no longer find my company to your liking, we shall provide you with new lodgings. Until this moment I have spared the rod... And the ungrateful child has broken my heart. When you have learned to appreciate what you have, perhaps we shall meet again. Until then... Think on your sins. JOHANNA! Where are you taking her?! Tell me or I swear by God...! Would you kill me, boy?! Here i stand! I feel you, Johanna, I feel you. Do they think that walls can hide you? Even now I'm at your window. I am in the dark beside you, buried sweetly in your yellow hair, Johanna... And are you beautiful and pale, with yellow hair, like her? I'd want you beautiful and pale, the way I've dreamed you were... Johanna... And if you're beautiful, what then, with yellow hair, like wheat? I think we shall not meet again- My little dove, my sweet... Johanna... I'll steal you, Johanna Goodbye, Johanna, You're gone, and yet you're mine. I'm fine, Johanna, I'm fine! Smoke! Smoke! Sign of the devil! Sign of the devil! City on fire! Witch! Witch! Smell it, sir! An evil smell! Every night at the vespers bell- Smoke that comes from the mouth of hell- City on fire! City on fire... Mischief! Mischief! Mischief... And if I never hear your voice, my turtledove, my dear, I still have reason to rejoice: The way ahead is clear... Johanna... I feel you... - And in that darkness when I'm blind Johanna... - with what I can't forget- It's always morning in my mind, my little lamb, my pet... Johanna... You stay, Johanna... The way I've dreamed you are. Oh look, Johanna-, A star! - Buried sweetly in your yellow hair... A shooting star! There! There! Somebody, somebody look up there! Didn't I tell you? Smell that air? City on fire! Quick, sir! Run and tell! Warn 'em all of the witch's spell! There it is, there it is, the unholy smell! Tell it to the Beadle and the police as well! Tell 'em! Tell 'em! Help! Fiend! City on fire... Mischief... Mischief... And though I'll think of you, I guess, until the day I die, I think I miss you less and less as every day goes by... And you'd be beautiful and pale, and look too much like her. If only angels could prevail, we'd be the way we were. I feel you... Johanna... Wake up, Johanna! Another bright red day! We learn, Johanna, to say... ...Goodbye. I'll steal you... Ladies and gentlemen, May I have your attention, please? Are your nostrils aquiver and tingling as well at that delicate, luscious ambrosial smell? Yes they are, I can tell... Well, ladies and gentlemen, that aroma enriching the breeze is like nothing compared to its succulent source, as the gourmets among you will tell you, of course. Ladies and gentlemen, you can't imagine the rapture in store- Just inside of this door! There you'll sample Mrs. Lovett's meat pies, Savory and sweet pies, as you'll see. You who eat pies, Mrs. Lovett's meat pies Conjure up the treat pies used to be! Toby! - Coming! Ale there! - Right, mum! Quick, now! Nice to see you, dearie... How have you been keeping?... Cor, me bones is weary! Toby-! One for the gentleman... Hear the birdies cheeping- Helps to keep it cheery... Toby! Throw the old woman out! What's my secret? Frankly, dear - forgive my candor- Family secret, all to do with herbs. Things like being careful with your coriander, That's what makes the gravy grander-! Eat them slow and feel the crust, how thin I rolled it! Eat them slow, 'cos every one's a prize! Eat them slow, 'cos that's the lot and now we've sold it! Come again tomorrow-! - Hold it! Bless my eyes-! Fresh supplies! How about it, dearie? - Is that a pie fit for a king, Be here in a twinkling! Just confirms me theory- Toby - ! God watches over us. - A wondrous sweet and most delectable thing? Didn't have an inkling... Positively eerie... - You see, maam, why there is no meat pie- Toby! Throw the old woman out! ...which is not to say we couldn't get some nice taxidermy animals to bring a touch of gentility to the place. You know, a boar's head or two... Mr. T., are you listening to me? Of course. Then what did I just say? There must be a way to the Judge! Judge! Always harping on the bloody old Judge! We got a nice respectable business now, money coming in regular and - since we're careful to pick and choose - only strangers and people wot won't be missed who's going to catch on? Oooh, Mr. Todd- I'm so happy- I could- Eat you up, I really could! You know what I'd like to do, Mr. Todd? What I dream- If the business stays as good, where I'd really like to go... In a year or so... Don't you want to know? Of course. Do you really want to know? Yes, I do. By the sea, Mr. Todd, That's the life I covet; By the sea, Mr. Todd, Ooh, I know you'd love it! You and me, Mr. T., we could be alone In a house wot we'd almost own down by the sea... Anything you say. Wouldnt that be smashing? Think how snug it'll be underneath our flannel When it's just you and me and the English Channel... In our cozy retreat, kept all neat and tidy, We'll have chums over every Friday... By the sea... Don't you love the weather by the sea? We'll grow old together by the seaside... By the beautiful sea! It'll be so quiet that who'll come by it except a seagull? We shouldn't try it, though, till it's legal, for two... But a seaside wedding could be devised, me rumpled bedding legitimized. My eyelids'll flutter, I'll turn into butter, The moment I mutter "I do!" There by the sea. Married nice and proper, by the sea - Bring along your chopper to the seaside, By the beautiful sea! Brought you some breakfast, dear, Mr. T., can I ask you a question? What did your Lucy look like? Can't really remember can you? She had yellow hair. You've got to leave all this behind you know... She's gone... Life is for the alive, my dear. We could have a life, us two... Maybe not like I dreamed, maybe not like you remember. But we could get by. Mr. Todd... Mrs. Lovett, ma'am... What is it, Anthony? He has her locked in a madhouse. Johanna? Fogg's Asylum. But I've circled the place a dozen times. Theres no way in. It's a fortress. I've got him. Mr. Todd? We've got her... Where do you suppose all the wigmakers of London go to obtain their hair? Bedlam. They get their hair from the lunatics at Bedlam. I don't understand- We shall set you up as a wigmaker's apprentice. That will gain you access - and then you take her. Go - quickly, go! Fetch the boy. Don't you think you should leave the boy now- Toby... Mr. Todd needs you. Yes'm. Mr. T.? You know where the Old Bailey is? Oh, yes, sir. Not that I've ever been there - Take this there and seek out a Judge Turpin. Repeat that. Go to the Old Bailey. Find Judge Turpin. Put this into his hands. Only to him. Do you understand? Yes, sir, and while I'm out do you mind if I stop by the grocer and pick up the- No, you are not to stop. You are not to speak! You are to deliver this letter! Do you understand? Yes, sir. Where you been, lad? We had quite a rush at the dinner time! Me poor bones is ready to drop... Mr. Todd sent me on an errand... And on the way back I went by the workhouse. Just to take a look. And I was thinkin'... But for you I would be there now. Or someplace worse. Seems like the Good Lord sent you for me. Oh, love, I feel quite the same way- Listen to me, please. You know there's nothing I wouldn't do for you. Say, if there was someone around - someone bad - only you didn't know it. What is this? What are you talking about? Nothing's gonna harm you, Not while I'm around. Nothing gonna harm you, no, sir, Not while I'm around... What do you mean, "someone bad"? Demons are prowling everywhere nowadays. I'll send 'em howling, I don't care- I got ways. Darling, hush now, there's no need for this... No one's gonna hurt you, No one's gonna dare. Others can desert you- Not to worry- Whistle, I'll be there. Demons'll charm you with a smile for a while, But in time nothing can harm you, Not while I'm around. That's nice, dear. Now, what is this foolishness? What are you talking about? Little things wot I been thinking... About Mr. Todd... Not to worry, not to worry, I may not be smart but I ain't dumb. I can do it, put me to it, Show me something I can overcome. Not to worry, mum. Being close and being clever ain't like being true, I don't need to, I won't never Hide a thing from you, like some. Now, Toby dear, haven't we had enough of this foolish chatter? Here, how about I give you a nice shiny new penny and you can get us some toffees-? That's Signor Pirelli's purse! No, no, love - this is just something Mr. T. give me for my birthday- That proves it - You've gotta come, mum! We gotta find the Beadle and get the law here - Hush now, Toby, hush... You're not going anywhere. You just sit here, nice and quiet... Next to me. That's right. How could you think such a thing of Mr. Todd, who's been so good to us? Nothing's gonna harm you, not while I'm around. Nothing's gonna harm you, darling, not while I'm around. Demons'll charm you with a smile for a while, but in time nothing's gonna harm you, not while I'm around. Funny we should be having this little chat right now... 'Cause I was just thinkin', you know how you've always fancied coming into the bakehouse with me to help make the pies? Yes, ma'am. Well... no time like the present. I'm feeling bad for you goin' up and down all these stairs! Well, that'll be your job now. Yes, ma'am! Coo, quite a stink, ain't there? You see those grates go right down to the sewers and the smell come up, always a few rats gone home to Jesus down there. Now this would be the bake oven... Three dozen at a time. Always be sure the doors is closed properly, like this. Doors closed properly. And here's the grinder... You pop in the meat, give it a good grind and it comes out here. You try. Good grind, comes out there. That's my boy. Now I've got to pop upstairs, back in two shakes, all right? Do you mind if I have a pie while I wait? As many as you like, son... ...Oh yes, sir, I agree. It would be to our mutual interest to come to some arrangement in regard to my poor children's hair. Brunettes... Redheads... I keep the blondes in here. It was yellow hair you was looking for, sir? Yes. That one has hair the shade I need. Come, child. Smile for the gentleman and you shall have a sweetie. Now, where shall I cut? Not a word, Mr. Fogg, or it will be your last... Now, I leave you to the mercy of your children. I got him locked in - but if he escapes hell go to the law! Then he won't escape. I don't know, Mr. Todd- The Judge will be here soon! Excuse me, sir! You gave me a fright! Not my intention, good madam, I assure you. though I am here on official business. You see, there's been some complaints. About the stink from your chimney. They say at night, it's something most foul. Health regulations - and the general public welfare, naturally - being my duty, I'm afraid I'll have to take a look... ...at your bakehouse. Of course, sir... But first why don't you come upstairs and let me attend to you? Much as I do appreciate tonsorial adornment, I really ought see to my "official" obligations first. I completely understand - But you indulge me, sir... What is that exotic aroma? Me secret is a touch of ambergris. But dare I offer you something more appropriate for a gentleman of your standing? The ladies would greatly appreciate it, sir... Well... you are the expert in these matters... Can you take a moment? Would you like a bit of... bay rum, sir? Oooh, bay rum is bracing. Let me out! Please, let me out! Toby? Where is he? Toby! Where are you, love? Toby! Nothings gonna harm you... Not while Im around... Toby! Where are you hiding? Nothings gonna harm you, darling... Not while Im around. Toby... Mr. Todd...? You wait for him here. I'll return with the coach in less than half an hour... Don't worry, no one will recognize you... You're safe now. Safe... So we run away and then all our dreams come true? I hope so... I have never had dreams. Only nightmares. Johanna... When were free of this place all the ghosts will go away. No, Anthony, they never go away. I'll be right back to you... Half an hour and we'll be free. Beadle... Beadle... No good hiding, I saw you! Are you in there still? Beadle... Beadle... Beadle dear, Beadle... Who are you? What are you doing here?! Ah, evil is here, sir. The stink of evil - from below - from her!... She's the Devil's wife! Oh, beware her, sir. She with no pity... ...in her heart... Hey, don't I know you, mister? Where is she? Below, your Honor. With my neighbor. Thank heavens the sailor did not molest her. Thank heavens, too, she has seen the error of her ways. She has? Oh yes, your lesson was well learned. She speaks only of you, longing for forgiveness. Then she shall have it. She'll be here soon, you say? Yes. Excellent, my friend! How about a shave? Sit, sir. Sit. Pretty women! - Pretty women, yes. Johanna, Johanna... Pretty women... Pretty women are a wonder... What we do for pretty women... Blowing out their candles, combing out their hair- Then they leave- Even when they leave you and vanish, they somehow can still remain there with you there... How seldom it is one meets a fellow spirit! With fellow tastes - in women, at least. What? What's that? The years no doubt have changed me, sir. But then, I suppose the face of a barber - The face of a prisoner in the dock - is not particularly memorable. Benjamin Barker! BENJAMIN BARKER! Rest now, my friend, Rest now forever, Sleep now the untroubled sleep of the angels. Come for a shave, have you, lad? No - I... Everyone needs a good shave-! Forget my face. Die! Die! God in heaven - die! You! Why did you scream? He was clutching onto my dress, but he's finished now... I'll take care of it. Open the door. Open the door, I said! "Don't I know you?" she said... You knew she lived. I was only thinking of you! You lied to me... No, no, not lied at all. No, I never lied. Lucy... Said she took the poison - she did - Never said that she died - Poor thing, she lived - I've come home again... - But it left her weak in the head, All she did for months was just lie there in bed- Lucy... - Should've been in hospital, Wound up in Bedlam instead, poor thing... Better you should think she was dead. - Oh, my God... Yes, I lied 'cos I love you! - Lucy... I'd be twice the wife she was! I love you! Could that thing have cared for you like me? What have i done?! Mrs. Lovett, you're a bloody wonder, Eminently practical and yet appropriate as always, As you've said repeatedly, there's little point in dwelling on the past. No, come here, my love... - Everything I did I swear I thought Not a thing to fear, my love... - was only for the best, believe me! - What's dead... is dead. - Can we still be married? The history of the world, my pet- - Do you mean it? Oh, Mr. Todd, Oh, Mr. Todd, leave it to me. Is learn forgiveness and try to forget. By the sea, Mr. Todd, we'll be comfy-cozy, By the sea, Mr. Todd, where there's no one nosy... And life is for the alive, my dear, so let's keep living it-! Just keep living it, really living it-! There was a barber and his wife... and she was beautiful... A foolish barber and his wife, she was his reason and his life. And she was beautiful. And she was virtuous. And he was... |
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