Let me go, just for a minute.
You're going to stare that baby
into a coma.
Stop exaggerating.
It's not good to keep checking
and imagining terrible things.
- I know, I know.
- Here it starts. Here we go.
Rudyard...
Rudyard, she's not breathing.
Honey, she's sleeping.
The baby's sleeping.
No...
- Rudyard, it's crib death.
- It's sleep!
- She's asleep, honey.
- Maybe.
Come on!
Emma.
Oh, good.
That's better.
No, thank you.
Thanks. Emma?
He was one of the most dependable men
that ever worked for me.
- I know. Thank you.
- He was a good man.
I'm real sorry about your daddy.
Take care of your momma.
Emma? Emma, wake up, please.
- Wake up.
- What's wrong?
I was tense and I was wondering
how you were feeling.
- Would you like to sleep in my bed?
- No, thank you.
Would you like to sleep
in my bed again?
Yes!
What are we going to do
with this hair?
Hey, Emma!
Patsy, hurry up!
You're going to miss him.
Oh, that's what they were looking at!
- Good night, honey.
- Where's Momma?
That old fart's trying
to get in her pants.
- What if the astronaut shows up?
- Oh, they're everywhere in Houston!
- Say hi to Race.
- OK. Love ya. Astronauts!
So?
- We better get going.
- I'll say goodbye. Want to go with?
No. I don't think I'm up to it today.
Sure would be nice
to have a mother somebody liked.
Why don't you accept the fact that
you have certain biological needs?
- Because I don't.
- Mom! I'm going now.
Excuse me.
Can you believe it?
He wants to take me to Tahiti.
I don't know why you treat these men
like this. They have feelings too.
- Has the astronaut moved in yet?
- Who?
Patsy teaching you coy lessons?
Breedlove. Has he moved in?
- Put your socks up!
- Say goodbye to Patsy.
- Be home by eleven.
- Say goodbye to Patsy.
- Goodbye, Patsy!
- Thank you.
In this day and age, anything goes!
I feel really foolish getting stoned
to hear Mary Martin.
See, Patsy...
This is not Mary Martin,
this is Ethel Merman.
This is the last time
we're gonna be like this.
I just plain refuse
to get into that kind of thinking.
It should not stop.
I mean, we're gonna be best friends.
Our babies will be best friends.
We'll all be best friends.
Oh, God!
- Just a minute.
- Open the door.
Emma, open the door.
Just a minute.
- I need to talk to you!
- All right.
I'm getting married. What the hell?
- Meet me in my room?
- Yes.
- What do you think she wants?
- Maybe to tell you how to have sex.
What?! No. She only knows
how to avoid it.
I can't believe you said that.
I didn't mean it.
I didn't mean it, I swear.
What have you been doing, Emma?
Nothing.
What is it, Momma?
I really want to get some sleep so
I look halfway decent for tomorrow.
Come on. What is it?
Would you want me to be silent
about something for your own good?
Yes, ma'am, I would!
OK, come on.
Come on.
I've been in here all night.
I've been trying to decide what...
what wedding gift to get you.
I thought of that Renoir
that my mother gave me.
But I couldn't reach a conclusion.
Then I came to grips with the reason
why I couldn't think of a gift.
Oh, Momma, it's all right.
I need dishes, a rotisserie...
The car...the house...
I'm totally convinced
if you marry Flap Horton tomorrow,
it will be a mistake
of such gigantic proportions,
it will ruin your life
and make wretched your destiny.
Why are you doing this to me?
You are not special enough
to overcome a bad marriage.
Use your brains.
Flap is limited.
He hasn't got any imagination.
Even at this age, all he wants
is a secure teaching job.
Mother...
I'm marrying Flap Horton tomorrow.
I thank God
Flap's getting me out of here.
If this is your attitude,
don't come to my wedding.
That's right.
No, I think you're right.
The hypocrisy was bothering me, too.
My own mother's
not coming to my wedding.
Listen to her. She's going crazy.
I'll give her until noon tomorrow.
Emma, your mother
boycotted your wedding,
she hates your husband
and only holds you in medium esteem.
Medium esteem.
That is so cute. That is so cute.
Wouldn't it have been strange
to marry a person who didn't read?
There's millions of interesting
people who never pick up a book.
Flap, I feel so totally good about
us. I hope I get pregnant tonight.
That would be nice.
I love the way you look.
You're so nice.
I... You're my sweet-assed gal.
Here comes the bride!
Wait, Flap. Where did you learn
how to do that?
That is the strangest
music to make love to.
I know.
Leave me alone. I'm happy.
I don't want to talk to you.
No. Did you see the tablecloth
Rosie gave me?
It's beautiful.
It's got red flowers on it.
She made it. No, not yet.
Home-made omelettes.
Just ordered 'em. Kinda Tex-Mex.
No. That was the worst thing
you've ever done to me, Mother!
Well, I think you owe my husband
an apology.
Until you apologise,
I'm not listening to your gossip.
No. Well, he's right here.
Hold on.
Yes. Yes.
Hello, Mrs Greenway.
No, ma'am, I am not
enjoying your predicament.
Momma, be nice!
As a matter of fact,
I don't need or desire an apology.
All I want is for you to understand
and appreciate my position,
to respect our marriage,
and to wait another 15 minutes
before you call in the morning.
Yes, I guess I've said my piece.
OK, I'll put her on.
He's so great!
I'll talk to you later.
I don't care about the neighbourhood.
Can't you stay a little while longer?
I thought we were having
a real good time, didn't you?
Listen, don't go yet.
One more minute.
I've got something to show you.
No, really.
- Thanks.
- Good night.
- I bought you something.
- What?
A tie.
You didn't buy this for me.
You were worried about
how I'd look to your mother.
Stop being a quisling
where she is concerned.
Whenever I get happy,
you turn perverse.
- Buying this tie made you happy?!
- Yes! Yes!
I wish you could understand,
cos you really don't.
It made me very happy,
buying this tie.
I went to two or three places.
Then describing your jacket, knowing
it would match what you're wearing,
which, by the way, it certainly does.
I mean, it was fun!
It was a goddamn mardi gras and
you're too dumb to understand that!
I'm sorry. I'm being terrible.
Going to your mother's,
it makes me a little irrational.
Can I help?
Yes. Thank you, Flap.
Take this candle. I need another one.
- In the kitchen?
- Yes.
That looks great.
Who's that short gentleman?
Not that it's any of your business...
Just leave it at that.
What are you looking at?
She isn't there any more.
She'll be back.
I'm Edward Johnson, Aurora's friend.
Pleased to meet you. Vernon Dahlart.
God, isn't she something?
Here she comes.
I met her two weeks ago at church.
You might say she's God's gift
to Vernon Dahlart.
Then you like her?
Oh, no. Does it show?
Good food.
Well, this is what I used to serve
when I lived in Boston.
Vernon, you haven't said a word.
Is that right? I feel like
I haven't stopped talking.
I guess because
I've been thinking about you so much.
Can I suggest how to handle me?
Yes, ma'am.
Don't worship me
until I've earned it.
Thank you, ma'am. I appreciate
any advice you can give me.
Don't talk
with your mouth full, Vernon.
I wouldn't do that.
I just did it to make you laugh.
What's wrong with you?
I got some good news.
What's that?
I'm unofficially pregnant.
We haven't gotten the tests back yet,
but you know me, I'm never late.
Well...
I don't understand.
If you're not happy for me,
I'll get so mad if you're not happy.
Why should I be happy
about being a grandmother?
Does this mean you won't be
knitting any booties?
Flap...
Every time you get more than
two drinks in you, you confront me.
And I won't have it.
I won't have it,
not in this house. Excuse me.
Do you need some help?
No. I'll be fine
just as soon as I stretch my legs.
Oh, God.
Mr Breedlove.
You're bleeding.
Yeah.
It's OK.
Come on in.
No, thank you.
What are you afraid of?
Afraid?
Well...
Why not...?
Why not come on in?
Because you're much older
than the boys I date,
cos you're drunk,
and because when I went to see
an astronaut give a lecture,
I didn't expect him
to prowl after us all night.
I didn't expect some silly flirt
who had to keep his jacket open
because his belly's getting too big.
I expected a hero.
Well, OK, Doris, don't come in.
I don't want you in my house.
Lee Anne, would you like to come in?
You better tend to that cut.
Tommy, show me your belly.
Come on. Come on!
- How can you dress him like that?
- He's adorable. Look at him.
Oh, great, Tommy.
That's Vernon. So tell him I'm...
- Out?
- No. Tell him I'm resting.
Hello?
Hi, Flap.
Where? No. Tell me now.
I want to know now.
Oh, Flap, you did not
expect I'd be happy.
Let's be honest with each other
before we start pretending.
Look, Mom's staring at me right now,
so can I talk about it later to you?
Yeah.
All right.
Bye.
How long you going to
keep this a secret?
The only school that would accept
his associate professorship
is in Des Moines.
He can't even do the simple things,
like fail locally.
It's gonna be all right, Momma.
It's Des Moines.
- Say, "Bye-bye, house".
- Bye-bye, house.
Be careful going down these steps.
Don't break your leg.
Come here.
Come here. Come here.
Stay sweet, honey.
Rosie...
That's enough, Rosie.
They have to get started.
Tell Momma to drive you home when
you work late. Have some fun, Rosie.
Don't act so brave. I know you'll go
crazy without me to nag.
Be good to her or else we'll get you.
I mean it.
Bye, Flap. Have a good drive.
OK, fingers and toes in.
Take Momma's purse.
Momma, that's the first time
I stopped hugging first.
I like that.
Get yourself a decent
maternity dress.
You had to get one in, didn't you?
Will you tell her, Patsy?
She keeps thinking it's me.
Tom... Are you gonna be good
to your mother and take care of her?
Bye, Mrs Greenway.
Goodbye.
Write as soon as you get there,
so I'll have your address, OK?
You shape up, Patsy.
Dropped my gum.
We'll get you another piece,
sweetheart.
The phone bill will be enormous,
you know that?
I'll miss you, Momma.
- Can we go now?
- Yeah. Pull away slow.
Honey, I think it will be good for us
to be away from your...
Our families.
- I miss Houston.
- You don't know how lucky you are.
Everybody wants to go to Des Moines.
People come from all over the world
to get one look at Des Moines
before they die.
Some people say
it's the best city in lowa.
I know you're teasing me.
Texas is the best!
Well, I think
you should stop worrying.
We're gonna see
some terrific new things. We are.
Would you please, if you will,
hold it down over there?
Sorry, I can't hear you.
Hold it down! Have some respect
for other people's feelings!
Come over a little closer.
Hey, you in the bush,
I can't hear you!
Sorry, but I just took a sauna.
It's hard not to yell when you hit
that cold water.
You're not gonna ignore me
when I speak directly to you?
I'm not ignoring you.
What am I supposed to say?
OK, It's hard not to yell
when you hit that cold water.
Hey, come here.
Come here?
What is your name?
- Aurora?
- Yes.
You want a shock?
No, not especially. What?
Well... We're going to have
this dinner at...
a NASA dinner at the White House.
You know, some cosmonauts
and all of us, and...
I didn't know who I could take.
Cos all the people I flew with,
well, their wives are giving me
bitch bites all over my back
if I showed up
with my regular girls.
I didn't know anybody old enough,
so I thought,
"Well, I'll ask
my next-door neighbour."
Well, anyway,
they cancelled the dinner,
but I was really thinking
about asking you out.
Seriously. Ain't that a shocker?
Yes.
Imagine you having a date with
someone where it wasn't a felony.
What would you have said
if I'd asked you?
Seriously.
I would have said I'd like to see
the White House.
So you would have come?
What the hell. You want to have
dinner out some time?
- No, thank you.
- What about lunch?
You ladies, you like
to have lunch a lot, don't you?
You know, there's something
about your manner.
It's like you're trying
to toy with me.
That's right, Aurora.
I'm playing with you.
- This is exactly...
- Do you want to play, Aurora?
You wanna go to lunch,
we'll have lunch.
If you want to have lunch
in some restaurant
to improve the atmosphere in this
neighbourhood, I wouldn't say no.
Come here.
We're too far apart to talk.
Now...Aurora.
Since you've agreed,
why don't we just
forget about the rest?
I mean, I know how you feel.
There were countdowns...
when I had my doubts.
I said to myself,
"You agreed to do it.
"You're strapped in...
"and you're in the hands
"of something bigger
and more powerful than yourself.
"So why not just lay back
and enjoy the ride?"
I'm not going.
There is something wrong with you.
Oh, God, I'm such a shit.
- Wait! That must be it.
- Right there? Oh, God!
Oh, Flap, it's great.
Is that it, really?
- I think that's it.
- Oh, it's great. Isn't that sweet?
- Oh, that was a bump.
- Oh, yeah.
- What is that?
- Shall we go see the house?
You stay here.
I'll come round and get you.
Come on. Let's get this off.
Come on.
Come on.
- Sweetheart, did you hurt yourself?
- Nope, not yet.
Do you like it? Do you like it?
Oh, it's great. Flap, it's great!
Oh, my God.
Leave the mattress here.
We can sleep here.
I'm really tired.
You ever made love in lowa?
You know what? Tommy's room
is on the other side of the hall,
so we can get noisy.
Good. You get to make your little
high-pitched squeak.
Stop it! What about you?
What about you?
"Here I come. Here I come again!
"Yes! Yes! Yes!"
Here I come again.
Yes.
Yes.
- Yes.
- Oh, God.
You just made me wet.
How can you do that with your voice,
just like that?
You just make your voice like that.
Oh, God, if Tommy can't hear us,
we can't hear Tommy!
- He's fine, mother!
- Don't get pissy, I'll be back!
I have papers to grade.
This isn't love, it's selfishness.
It's been a week since
we've been together.
We've never gone a whole week, Flap.
- Sure, we've gone a week.
- Only in the real pregnant months.
You're always getting home so late,
Flap. Oh, forget it. Forget it!
Do me a favour. Don't make me feel
silly, I won't make you feel guilty.
Fair enough. I have to hurry.
Be a good boy.
Emma?
I love that you came back. You're
saving our lives by doing this.
I love that you came back, Flap,
I love it!
Tommy, breakfast will be in a minute.
Let's hurry.
I've got to grade those papers.
I'll give everybody a B!
Come on! Wait!
Come on, come on!
Hello? Hi, Mother.
Could we talk later?
I've got to get the boys off and it's
not a good time to be on the phone.
Don't be so inconsiderate.
I'm all set to have a good talk.
You've got almost an hour
to get the boys off. What's wrong?
- Nothing.
- Stop here. Tell me what it is.
OK, Mother. I need some money.
I need you to loan me some money.
I really need it, so will you?
Oh, Mother, please don't be quiet.
You know that was hard for me to ask.
You can say no,
but please don't be quiet.
Oh, I'm sorry, sweetheart.
I was just thinking.
Thinking what?
How much I hate to part with money.
I wouldn't have asked if...
Don't yell, but I really think
that I may be pregnant again.
Oh! No!
Oh, no! And you're going
to have it, I suppose?
Yes, of course.
What's happening to you, anyway?
Don't act like that's so terrible.
Bright young women
are having simple abortions.
"Simple"?
Then they get wonderful jobs.
You can have it in Colorado.
I don't know why I tell you anything.
I seem to like you less.
You know why? I am the only person
who tells you the truth.
Go get dressed.
How will your life get better if you
keep having children with that man?
What miracle is going to come along
to rescue you?
Leave me alone. I need the money.
Give me the painting to sell.
No! That's your security.
I will not have you
using that for rent!
Let's not do this. All right?
All right? I'll talk to you later.
All right?
All right. If it would mean that...
No, don't give me the money.
It'd make you crazy.
Yes, it would.
We'll talk later. You call me
tonight, if you want, all right?
Goodbye.
Daddy just got home.
Hey, no kidding?
ls it tough being a genius?
Boy!
Great news. I know what my topic is.
I have it all figured out.
What's wrong?
Where have you been all night, Flap?
I'm sorry. I fell asleep on
that big sofa at the library again.
I don't know what's wrong with me.
I'm on to you.
I'm not doing anything.
Oh, yes, you are.
We go through this stage
every time...
Don't change the subject.
What's the subject?
That I'm on to you.
You wouldn't try to look so innocent
unless you were guilty.
You'll have to take my word for it.
You have no other choice.
Excuse me.
Emma, you...always get
a little paranoid
in your first few months, OK?
Just...
If you are doing something
and you're trying to make me feel
crazy because I'm pregnant,
then you may have sunk so low
that you'll never recover.
You may have just panicked, Flap,
and trying to save yourself,
you've thrown out
your character and principles.
The only way to redeem yourself, and
be the man God intended you to be,
is to admit anything you
might have been doing last night.
Cos if you don't do that,
if you don't do that right now,
you are a lost man.
A shell, a bag of shit dust.
You've got to tell me.
For us, honey. Come on.
Hello?
Hello, Aurora.
How are you?
Yes, she is. She's right here.
Nice to hear your voice again.
Why don't you get a job
if you're worried about money?
What about the baby?
It's a great day
when you get tenure!
All tenure means is
we won't have enough money forever!
Why don't you ask your mother?
- That's convenient for you!
- Go ahead! Call her!
Why should today be any different?
Get on the phone, Emma!
Get on the phone!
- Why don't you call?
- Yeah, I'll call Aurora, right(!)
Get on the phone! Get on the phone!
Get on the phone, Emma!
Get on the phone!
Get on the damn phone!
- Mommy said to wait right here.
- Stay if you want.
What are you guys doing here? I told
you to wait in front of the house.
Answer me, Tommy.
I didn't want people
to think we lived there.
What?
I didn't want people
to think we lived there.
Cut it out.
OK. You're allowed to say
one mean thing to me a year.
That'll do till you're ten.
You're driving Daddy away.
OK, Tommy. Stand up and follow me.
Don't make me hit you on the street.
Hurry up.
I said hurry. Come on!
Forty-four dollars.
Twenty, thirty...
Let's see. That's $38.40...
You don't have enough money?
I don't have any cheques. I guess
I'll have to put some things back.
Can I have the register key?
She doesn't have enough money!
It's no big thing.
I brought the wrong purse.
Here, take this.
43.75.
41 .35.
- You said I could have something!
- I won't give her real food.
- Give her this.
- No way!
- 40.35.
- Mom!
All right. Here.
40.55.
40.75. We're going
in the wrong direction.
Why do you have to be so damn nasty?
It's not going to help anything.
We're both people, you know?
40.75.
I don't need it.
Mrs Horton, I'm Sam Burns
from the bank.
I turned you down on the second
on your house.
Oh, of course.
I remember who you are.
Can I help you make up
the difference?
Thanks. I'd appreciate it.
I'll pay you back tomorrow.
You're a very rude young woman.
I know Douglas and I doubt he'd want
you treating customers so badly.
I don't think
I was treating her badly.
Then you must be from New York.
- Be careful, Teddy!
- What?
Be careful!
- Where's your car?
- Right here.
That was worst time ever. I didn't
know I could get cheered up so fast.
- No problem.
- Come on, Mom.
- Wait by the car.
- Come on!
- Wait there.
- No!
- Wait by the car, honey.
- But...
Wait over by the car, honey!
Over by the car!
Now! Now!
Now!
Nice boys.
You're great with them, too. Really.
I think all three of us
are going through a stage.
- Hey, thanks again.
- Oh, no thanks required.
I've had a lovely time.
Me, too.
I'll get the money back to you.
Oh, don't bother yourself.
Just drop it in the mail.
- To the bank?
- Sure.
You could even use
a cheque-by-mail envelope.
Or...you could come in.
Whichever.
Maybe I'll come in some time.
Well, that'd be fine.
- Hey, can I help you with that?
- No, thanks. I'm used to this.
"And so, another birthday
for a gal named Aurora Greenway
"Even though 50,
she still takes my breath away
"Mere mortals just gaze
as she lights up their sky
"A heavenly object, a siren's cry"
You're the best. Happy birthday.
Thank you, Edward.
Thank you.
Do you want one, Vernon?
Would you like a kiss?
You're not lying about your age,
are you?
Of course not.
I thought you were 52.
She's really 52.
Come on, how do you expect
to fool a family doctor?
- It seems to me she said her age.
- Thank you.
The number doesn't matter,
but the effort to conceal it does.
- Why does he keep talking?
- Dr Ratcher...
I'm trying to do some good here!
- The way to adjust to old age...
- Doctor...
I think you're confused,
being recently widowed and all.
You OK?
Let's give her some privacy.
Yeah? The door's open.
Just a minute.
Well, hello.
Hi.
I was curious if you still wanted
to take me to lunch.
I wasn't aware that we...
A few years back,
you invited me to lunch.
A few years back?
I wondered if the invitation
still exists. Would you like to?
Do lunch.
- Not dinner, remember. It was lunch.
- Why not? No.
Good.
When?
Tomorrow?
Tomorrow?
All right. All right.
Good.
Twelve thirty?
Twelve.
Good.
Thank you.
Thanks.
If you mind the open air,
I could get the top.
No. Don't worry.
Grown women are prepared
for life's little emergencies.
Us going out together...
Not bad, huh?
Do you think...? Do you think
you could possibly put the top up?
The top's at home in the garage.
Hello, there. How are you?
How are you, Ali?
It's nice to see you.
Fred, that we met at that bar.
He asked me out.
- Oh, God.
- We went to the Cadillac Bar.
It's a fun place if you're with
the right people, but I wasn't.
Well...l'm starving!
No hidden meaning in that remark.
Well... Would you like an oyster?
No.
- Thank you.
- It's good.
I think that is extremely rude,
noticing other women
when you're with me.
I...
think we're going
to have to get drunk.
I don't get drunk,
and I don't care for escorts who do.
You got me into this.
You're just gonna have to trust me
about this one thing.
You need a lot of drinks.
To break the ice?
To kill the bug that you have
up your ass.
May I get you something?
Yes, I think I will have some
bourbon, preferably Wild Turkey.
Yes?
You're not fun, by any chance,
are you?
I don't really think we should think
about that right now.
Impatient boys
sometimes miss dessert.
We both got here at the same time!
Hi, Sam. How are you?
It's nice to see you.
It's always so nice to see you.
I can hardly believe it.
You, too.
What I didn't expect
was there to be moments
where I'd forget to be scared
someone would see us together.
Sam, you don't have to be scared.
I mean, contemplating sin
is all we've done, it's OK.
Oh. I'm glad that you've been
contemplating it, too.
I didn't know that.
Well, all these lunches,
all this hand holding?
I'm not going back to the bank
this afternoon.
I have to go out
and inspect a new house.
It's pretty far out,
and, well...it's empty.
- I gotta pick up my kids at five.
- Oh, OK.
Well, I understand.
Look, don't give it a thought.
Emma, I haven't made love
to a woman...
in almost three years.
How come?
My wife has a disc problem.
And she can't take having...
any weight on her.
Sam, I hope you don't mind me
asking you this, but...
have you ever thought of
your wife getting on top?
Oh, she wouldn't do that.
She may surprise you.
No, I don't think so.
It would be so unlike her.
- Did you ask?
- About 600 times.
What are you thinking?
Tell me, do you prefer Texas to lowa?
- What were you really thinking?
- Really, that's what I was thinking.
I don't know, there seems to be
an absence of wildness, you know?
Even in the people!
Well, we're farmers and we talk poor,
because the farmer aspect is
"don't let anybody know
you have anything"
and "don't call attention
to yourself".
My wife says... Well, I guess
we shouldn't talk about Dottie.
Wind in the hair! Lead in the pencil!
Feet controlling the universe!
Breedlove at the helm!
Just keep pumping that throttle!
Keep giving it that gas!
I see the Gulf of Mexico below me!
I'm not enjoying this!
Give it a chance.
I am going to stop!
Fly me to the moon!
How are you?
It's not my fault, but I'm sorry.
If you wanted to get me on my back,
you just had to ask me.
My hand!
Get it out of there!
- I can't! I swear!
- Get it out!
- I swear to God!
- Out!
We were having such a good time
and you had to go do this!
Please, anything!
Bend down! Bend down!
- Why did you have to get drunk?
- I am not drunk...any more!
The pain sobered me up.
Emma, this is terrible to ask -
are you thinking about your husband?
- I was a little.
- We can go back.
No, Sam. Stop it.
Look, I want to do this.
I'm glad I don't know whether
Flap's been with someone else.
I'd hate to think I was doing this
just to get even.
Oh, just... Look... Great! Fine.
Great!
You're parked in my driveway!
You're breaking the law!
Thank you!
Would you like to come in?
I'd rather stick needles in my eyes.
Everything would have been just fine
if you hadn't gotten drunk.
I just didn't want you to think
I was like one of your other girls.
Not much danger in that unless you
curtsy on my face real soon.
Garrett!
What makes you so insistent
on shocking and insulting me?
I mean, I really hate that
way of talking. You must know that.
Why do you do it?
I'll tell you, Aurora.
I don't know what it is
about you, but...
you do bring out the devil in me.
Where are you?
In the laundry room
so nobody could hear.
Sam, I can't hear you, either.
Wait a minute.
We're getting a quieter cycle.
- OK.
- Can you hear me now?
- Yeah.
- Good. Is it bad to call?
No, I'm in the market
for a little sweet talk.
- Mom, I have to go!
- Just a minute.
- What?
- Really!
Hurry up.
- What is it?
- Just how absolutely good I feel.
And even though I'm scared,
and we've committed adultery,
no matter what happens,
I'm just so grateful
to God or the devil
for...letting me
feel this way again.
I'm so glad you told me that.
- Don't flush!
- You told me always to!
Not this time.
- Emma, is it OK? Can you talk?
- No, it's all right.
- Can I hold Melanie?
- Yes.
- Honey, is everything OK?
- What?
- Is everything OK?
- Everything's fine.
Oh, yeah. Everything's fine.
An emergency call from Mrs Aurora
Greenway in Houston for Emma Horton.
- Oh, no!
- She does that when the line's busy.
- Will you release?
- Of course. We were just talking.
Talk to you later, Sam. Bye.
Hi. How'd it go?
The astronaut is impossible.
An arrogant, self-centred,
and, yes, somewhat entertaining man
who has realised his ambition,
and is at last a spoiled child.
- A match made in heaven.
- Yeah, you'd think so, wouldn't you?
I don't think he wants to have
anything more to do with me.
- Oh, why?
- I don't wanna go into it.
- Cos you wouldn't go to bed?
- On a first date, Emma?
It's hardly a first date.
You've lived next door for 15 years.
- Why not say the real reason?
- What do you mean?
It's been that long
since you've done it.
Shut up! I mean it! Shut up!
Oh, it's just me.
- No.
- Call him!
- No! I'm hanging up.
- OK, I'm sorry.
- I'm hanging up.
- Call him now! So long.
- Hello?
- Hello, Garrett.
Yes?
Well, I was just sitting
here realising...
realising that
I had never shown you my Renoir.
What are you talking about?
I'm inviting you to come over
and look at my Renoir.
- You're inviting me to bed.
- It happens to be in my bedroom.
Is the Renoir under the covers?
Don't cackle, Garrett.
Do you want to see it?
Do I want to come to your bedroom?
- Let me think.
- Do you?
Just give me a minute.
It's a tough one.
I guess... I don't know.
Yeah, OK. I guess so, sure, why not?
I'll see you in a bit.
If I don't answer the bell,
the back door's open.
The back door's open.
My God. He ran it.
Hi.
I was doing laps when you called.
Lucky for us, I only did eight.
This is it.
This is the Renoir.
I like it.
I like the painting.
I like everything in here.
Relax, baby...
Now, just who do you
think you're talking to like this?
Don't you realise
I'm a grandmother?
It's not flattering
to look too surprised.
I'll just be a minute.
I like the lights on.
Then go home and turn them on.
Oh. I'm sorry.
Come on.
Dad. Come on, wake up, Dad.
- What? What?
- Melanie's sick.
- What?
- Melanie's sick.
- The baby's sick.
- The baby's sick?
Are you coming, Flap?
- What do you think's wrong?
- I have to look first.
Come on, Dad.
Thank you.
You can go to bed.
She's gonna be all right, she is.
- I can't sleep.
- Go to bed, I'll be there soon.
We're making this a drama.
It's not going to qualify
as high drama.
It's OK, it's OK.
Thanks.
I'm sure it's the croup.
Remember, Tommy had it twice?
Guess you were in the library.
God, that's the worst
sound in the world.
How long do you keep her in here?
- Why? Are you going back to bed?
- I just asked how long.
Well, I don't know.
Until her throat clears or I lose
20 pounds, whichever comes first.
I don't know, I don't know.
About 20 minutes, I guess.
I've been offered a job.
What?
Why didn't you say something?
I wanted to think about it.
It's head of the English department
at Kearney State College.
About the same money.
Oh. Where is it?
Nebraska.
I really don't want to move.
I love the school,
the paediatricians...
It's the head of the department.
We'll talk about it, all right?
I like it here, Flap.
Head of the department, that's...
That's great.
- Goodbye, Mom.
- Bye.
Come on, Teddy.
Don't kiss the baby,
she may still be sick.
Have a good day at school.
Oh, you don't know the night I had!
Melanie decided to get the croup at
3am and I haven't gotten any sleep.
He may be kidding, but Flap says
we're going to some Nebraska college.
I'm not sure, but I think
Sam is becoming someone that I need.
I'm lying here next to the astronaut.
Are you really?
How was it?
- I'll speak to you later.
- Oh, I feel so good for you.
I do. You call me
as soon as you can.
- Bye.
- Bye.
Mel...
OK, Mel.
I just want to make this clear,
you know.
I see other women.
I didn't think we were engaged.
- OK, OK.
- Your ego, really!
OK. Let's stay in tonight.
- You're saving a fortune on me.
- I'll cook.
It's been three weeks,
and you haven't even seen my house.
My best instincts
had me avoiding it.
What are you thinking?
I'll tell you what.
I think this is really sad,
that you feel that you need
all this stuff to impress girls with.
Need it?
Sometimes it isn't enough.
There's nothing wrong
with using your assets.
I think it turns your profession
into a sex trap.
Oh, come on. Everybody uses
whatever they have. I earned it!
There's 106 astronauts in the
whole world and I'm one of them!
It's a big part of me.
I'm sorry. I didn't...
I didn't mean to trip
on such a deeply felt principle.
Do you want to know what bothers me?
None of us ever got together
in one room, locked all the doors,
and compared notes
on the experience.
I think we had to pretend
it wasn't the fun that it was.
You do sense the speed.
I remember looking out
the window of the spacecraft...
I sound like somebody with a big
belly telling their Korea stories.
Anyway, once I'm
looking out the window.
I see a piece of the spacecraft,
and it's whistling along the ground.
It doesn't make a sound.
The only sound you hear,
the only noise in the entire world,
is your heart beating.
It's indescribable.
Maybe they can think of a better way
of saying it, but that was it.
That was my moment,
the one that doesn't go away.
You know what I mean?
Yes.
Hey...
This is my moment.
No, don't get nervous, Garrett.
Flap?
Anybody?
You don't think it's love
because we're having fun.
Love can be fun.
Would you stop making faces?
That's wonderful.
What we have here is
a typical grad-school girl crush.
Would you please, please, please
stop telling me this is a crush?
The fun with getting involved
with someone unavailable
and slightly older is sometimes you
get to hear what's really going on.
- Flap, you are such a...
- Incredible asshole!
Excuse me.
- Excuse me.
- Watch it, buddy!
Emma!
God damn it, Emma, you'll ruin us!
- Cos you're a spectacle!
- I am not!
Stop jiggling her, she'll throw up.
Your timing was perfect.
You caught us before we did anything.
I'm taking the kids to Houston.
Give me the baby.
You don't know what I did,
just like I don't know what you do
on your afternoon drives.
Professor Horton,
can we talk about my grade?
You ought to be happy I'm going.
If I stayed here,
I'd make life hell for you.
Don't follow me.
Excuse me. Excuse me.
Excuse me! Excuse me!
It's them. It's them!
- Garrett, come meet Emma.
- No, you don't need outsiders.
- You're no outsider!
- I'll see them later.
Em, Em, this is Garrett.
Oh! Pleasure to meet you.
I've heard so much about you.
Your mother's been looking
forward to this, too.
So, go ahead.
- Anything wrong, Garrett?
- No.
It was very nice to have met you.
Must be nice to be home.
Oh, it's great. It's great.
I'll be over later.
They're tired,
and will get to sleep early,
and I'd like to get to bed early.
Grandma, Grandma, Grandma!
Bye-bye.
Come on out. All right.
This one likes to squeeze.
Teddy likes to squeeze, Tommy likes
a squeeze. You both get a squeeze.
The baby. Where's the baby?
Oh, there is my baby.
Look at the baby!
I think she looks a little like you.
A little? Gee, it's like
looking in the mirror.
She loved the ride.
She hardly cried at all.
- Bring in the suitcases.
- OK.
- Mom...
- Well, I talk to you every day.
- Mother, you look great.
- You look terrible.
Nobody wants a girl
who's washed-out and tired-looking.
I just drove about 1 ,000 miles.
Besides, all the men
love me the way I am, Mother.
It's like you, when you finally take
one small step away from Flap,
it's with a married,
unavailable, older lowan, hmm?
Tell me about the astronaut.
We have to talk about it.
Are you going to sleep now,
or are we gonna talk?
How's the astronaut, Mother?
Really?
Oh, really?
Yes!
He has a name, though.
You really like him.
Yeah.
Well, it's just so...
It's so strange that relatively...
Relatively late in life,
I've found that sex is so...
so...so...
so...
..so fan-fucking-tastic!
Anyway, that's what he calls it.
A moth to flame.
This affair is going to kill me.
No. Maybe not. Why do you say that?
Come on, Mom.
I never thought
I'd start to need him.
You're so lucky you have a pool.
Come on, stand there. Stand there!
- OK.
- OK.
Let's talk about Los Angeles.
Do you miss it?
It was so interesting
dating Jews after the divorce.
They are so lively.
- Really?
- Yeah.
In Los Angeles, they were so anxious
to show they understood
your secret thoughts.
- Patsy!
- And I was just glad I had some.
Honey, there's
a telephone call for you.
Hello.
Oh, hi, Flap. How are you?
I'm fine.
- I look older, like everyone else.
- She does not.
Flap, you sound the same and I'm not
sure that's such a good thing.
Yeah, she's right here.
No, we have other things
to talk about besides you.
Hello?
I'm fine.
What's up? Feeling contrite?
You don't seem to understand.
I saw you together.
What?
You know, Flap, I can't believe
you're doing this to us.
Well, I think you're spiteful,
and I don't know
when the hell that happened.
No! Goodbye. I'll... Goodbye.
Flap accepted the job at Kearney,
Nebraska. We're moving in a week.
I don't know why you don't leave him.
Honestly, I don't know, either.
He's cute.
I've been packing for us all week.
Sure remembers her daddy.
So, are you gonna stay mad?
I think being uprooted without my
consent is worth a pout, don't you?
Come on.
- Head of the department.
- I know.
Here.
- Aurora?
- Garrett! I'm back here.
Well, hello, stranger.
What's it been, about two days?
Your family still around?
No, they left.
What?
You probably know
what I'm going to say.
Oh, maybe not. I hope not.
Well...
You're some kind of woman,
but I'm the wrong kind of man,
and it doesn't look like my shot
at being the right kind is...
as good as I was hoping for.
You don't even know how much
you'll miss me.
I don't want to blow smoke
up your ass.
Oh! What a relief.
It's just that I'm starting
to feel an obligation here.
It makes it rough,
especially living next door.
I'm starting to think
I gotta watch what I'm doing...
I... I am gonna miss you...
and I do feel bad.
You're lucky.
I feel humiliated.
Can I have a picture of you?
Yeah, but the only one I have
has Flap in it.
I don't mind.
Come here, give me a kiss.
When you finish,
I need this kind of type.
Hello, Emma. Hi, baby.
She wanted her daddy
to see her dressed up.
He'll be here any minute.
- I'll talk to you later.
- OK.
Excuse me.
Miss?
Miss?
Don't make me run after you,
I have a toddler here!
Are you the reason
that we came to Nebraska?
I think that Flap should talk to you.
We discussed that.
I don't want to say anything
until he does, except that
I don't think there's an emotion
you're having I couldn't...validate.
Tell you what.
If you see Flap,
tell him his wife and his baby
went to get their flu shots,
all right?
Why don't you do that?
Just hold still.
That's a good girl.
OK? You're all finished.
It's all over.
If it makes you feel any better,
Mommy's getting a shot, too.
- Can I give her a pop?
- Sure.
- Here.
- There you go.
Are they gonna tell me
if my husband calls?
You have a lump in your armpit.
- How long has it been there?
- I don't know.
Melanie, stop kicking the cabinet!
There's two of them.
It's not very big, though.
I have to be out of town next week
but you shouldn't wait.
They should come out.
Come out? Should I be scared?
If you're scared, you'll be happier
when it turns out to be nothing.
Dr Butch, Mom should get a pop, too,
for her shot.
- Right. Here, Mom.
- Thanks, Mel.
Well, I know what it is.
You don't keep yourself up
so your sweat glands are clogged.
- It's a cyst.
- So I shouldn't worry?
It's a cyst,
right where your oil glands are.
You never knew how to eat right
and you've never learned how to wash.
You're right. Thanks.
Talk to Melanie.
- Say hi.
- Hi.
Hello, how are you?
I sent you a blouse.
- Say goodbye.
- Bye.
OK. Say good...
Say goodbye to your mother.
What's her name?
Janice. What did the doctor say?
I told you, Flap. It's scary
that he wants to do it so fast.
Janice...with her little folder.
"l can't say anything until he does.
We've discussed it, Flap and l."
I mean, really, Flap!
"Validate my feelings." Your taste!
What the doctor said,
feeling good when it turns out...
No! Forget it, I won't make you
feel better, I'm too mad.
Dinner!
Dear, you have a malignancy.
- Say it again?
- Malignancy.
Rosie...our girl is in trouble.
She has a cyst that's malignant.
They're taking her to a hospital
in Lincoln, Nebraska.
We'll release her in a few days.
We do more and more
on an outpatient basis.
We shouldn't need to take her back,
unless the illness escalates.
But you're not telling me anything.
What are you confused about?
How is she?
I tell people to hope for the best
and prepare for the worst.
And they let you get away with that?
Look, you're wrong to see everything
as so desperate and serious.
And it won't do your daughter any
good to get those signals, either.
What's wrong now?
I'm so frustrated with that doctor.
But it boils down to this.
You're getting out and
you don't have to stay here again.
Unless the illness spreads.
I really don't feel sick.
Hey, Emma. Come to New York
for a visit. My treat.
Great. We'll have to see.
Look at these letters from the kids.
Teddy says he couldn't sleep,
but Melanie slept fine.
Tommy thinks there's nothing
to be concerned about...
Hey, I mean it! You have
time before you see the doctor.
Come see New York for a few days.
It's not a bad idea,
a vacation by yourself.
Rosie and I are here with the kids.
- Take advantage of your freedom.
- I know you wanna go.
This isn't like taking those kids
to Disneyland right before the end?
Stop!
- Oh, I'm sorry.
- Patsy, I'm kidding!
Do you feel funny
about leaving the kids?
I'm not leaving them,
I'm entrusting them to their father.
Oh, I thought as long as your mother
and Rosie are in town...
Not them. You.
- Emma, look! Look! Look!
- Are we there yet?
- Oh, God! I can't believe I'm here!
- Isn't it beautiful?
I want you to meet some of my
friends. Not friends like you and l.
- Hi.
- Hi.
Emma, this is Lizbeth.
- Hi, Elizabeth.
- Hi. It's Lizbeth.
- Isn't that what I said?
- You said "Elizabeth". It's Lizbeth.
- Oh, two names? Liz Beth?
- No, one. Lizbeth.
- Lizbeth?
- Never mind.
- And this is Jane.
- Thank heavens!
Here, that's Melanie.
Oh! Look at that!
Teddy's the younger one,
Tommy's the older one.
- The little girl's incredible.
- Don't think she doesn't know it.
Oh, Patsy's got a real thing
going with her. The boys, too.
Are you waiting till she's in school
before working again?
Oh, I never really work.
Well. That's OK.
Thanks.
Great.
When did she find out?
- About a month ago.
- There.
- What's wrong?
- Nothing.
It was a great honour meeting you,
have a wonderful time.
Thank you.
Those beautiful children are lucky
to have you for a mommy.
Y'all go ahead, take the first cab.
- Sure?
- Yeah. That's fine.
- Bye-bye, Patsy.
- See you.
Bye, darling.
- You told them, didn't you?
- Yeah, you don't mind, do you?
Of course not.
Emma, come on. They're jerks.
They don't know anything.
- Why do they act like that?
- Emma, talk to me!
It's not you. I don't care.
I don't mind them knowing.
In less than two hours, two of them
told me that they'd had abortions.
Three of them told me
they were divorced.
One hasn't talked to her mother
in four years.
And the one that has little Natalie
in a boarding school
because she has to travel
for her job?
Hell, Patsy!
Oh, the one with the yeast disease
that thought she had vaginal herpes?
If that's fit conversation for lunch,
what's so god-awful terrible
about my little tumours?
Yeah, of course, but...
what do you want me to do?
I want you to tell them
it ain't so tragic!
People do get better.
Tell them it's OK
to talk about the cancer!
Patsy tells us you have cancer.
We should talk later.
I'm a nutritionist,
and my husband's with Ticketron.
Thanks, Patsy.
- Hello.
- Flap? Have you heard anything?
No. Emma hasn't
called you either, then, huh?
No. How are the children?
I wish I were so carefree.
Yes, well, they don't have
anything to feel ashamed about.
You know something? You always
lose your manners around me.
Stop it, Flap.
Let me know if you hear.
If you talk to Emma,
don't sound so frightened.
I don't sound...frightened!
Daddy.
Hi, Mother. They're having this party
for me so I can't talk very long.
But I think I'm coming home
a few days early.
Not really.
It's about time
they gave us this room.
Mother, I can't believe you did this.
It's great.
Careful! These are worth more
than you'll make in your lifetime.
I grew up with it, you can take it
for a couple of minutes.
This is fine. Thank you so much.
Thank you.
Oh, they're wonderful!
They look good next to each other.
Help me with this, Melanie.
Gorgeous isn't everything.
This one, this one...two more.
The response to the drugs we tried...
isn't what we hoped.
There are investigatory drugs
which we are willing to utilise.
However, if you become incapacitated,
or it becomes unreasonable for you
to handle your affairs for a time,
it might be wise
to make some decisions now.
Any questions?
No.
I know what you're saying.
I have to figure out
what to do with my kids.
Excuse me. It's after ten.
Give my daughter the pain shot.
Mrs Greenway, I was going to.
- Good. Go ahead.
- Just a few minutes.
Please. It's after ten.
I don't see why
she has to have this pain?
- Ma'am, It's not my patient.
- It's time! Do something!
All she has to do is
hold on until ten!
And it's past ten!
My daughter's in pain!
- Give her the shot!
- Are you going to behave?
GIVE MY DAUGHTER THE SHOT!
Thank you very much. Thank you.
Can I have 222, please?
- Let's get her!
- I'm pushing Grandma in!
Don't you dare! I mean it.
Come on.
- Say, "Hi, Granny."
- Hi, Granny.
Aurora?
Well...
Who would have expected you
to be a nice guy?
Who?
It's good to see you.
Take care of yourself. I'll call you.
I'm real glad I came.
Your coming meant a lot to Emma.
It meant a lot to me, Garrett.
I'll be at the hospital all the time,
I'll call you.
No, if there's someone there, I'll
hear that funny sound in your voice.
I don't care.
Who cares? I don't care.
I'm glad you came, I love you.
Garrett!
Garrett!
Come here.
I was curious.
Do you have any reaction
to my telling you I love you?
I was just inches
from a clean getaway.
Well, you're stuck, so face it.
Well, I don't know what else to say
except my stock answer.
Which is?
I love you, too, kid.
Goodbye.
At the airport,
we were standing there
in front of the door hugging
and kissing, and saying goodbye.
- And you know what?
- What?
I got up the nerve
to tell him I loved him.
You know what his reaction was?
I don't give a shit, Mom, I'm sick.
Not everything is about you,
I've got a lot to figure out.
- I just don't wanna fight any more.
- What do you mean? When do we fight?
When do we fight? You amaze me.
I always think of us as fighting.
That's from your end.
That's cos you're
never satisfied with me.
- Have you seen her yet today?
- Yes.
I've been with her most of
last night and today, as usual.
I haven't, uh...
really talked to the kids yet.
I'm not sure how much they realise,
but they know
something bad's happening.
Flap...
Patsy wants to raise Melanie
and maybe the boys.
I think they should be with me,
don't you?
What can you be thinking about?
Raising three children,
working full time and chasing women
requires a lot more energy
than you have.
You know, one of the
nicest qualities about you
is that you recognise
your weaknesses.
Don't lose that quality
when you need it the most.
You have no right,
nor any invitation,
to discuss where
or how my children live.
From what the doctor says,
it's time that we have the talk now.
Do you know how much I hate
the idea of losing you?
Yes.
Well, nobody...
Nobody seems to know that except you.
I... Well...
What?
I'm thinking about my identity,
and not having one any more.
Who am l, if I'm not the man
who's failing Emma?
- You didn't fail me, Flap.
- I don't wanna discuss it.
I feel like I'm sucking after
forgiveness, which I probably am.
You were no more terrible than I was.
Except for the cheating.
You're right. Let's not do this.
Look, we had problems.
It was never over
whether we loved each other.
Oh, God! That tie!
I can't believe you wore that!
The mess it must've been finding it.
The house still isn't in one piece.
It was in the last box I looked in.
I'll bet.
God, you're easy to please.
I don't know why
I couldn't do more of it.
I'm so glad we're talking, I just am.
It just means so much to me that
we can still feel like this, so much.
I swear...
Listen, I am getting tired.
Just tell me, hon,
you really want to raise 'em?
I never thought I was the sort of man
who'd give up his kids.
It's a lot of work.
As hard as you think it is,
you end up wishing it were that easy.
Where do you want them?
I don't want them
to end up with Janice.
Well, she's not so bad.
I really don't think
they should be with you, honey.
Well...
To tell you the honest truth...
I'd probably screw it up.
I'll really miss them.
Well, maybe we should let
Patsy take them.
It'd be easy for me to work
research summers in New York.
No. Patsy really only wants Melanie.
Mother should have them.
You can see them any time you want.
You'll decide things
for them and everything.
She can make that very difficult.
She won't.
Well, I guess they should be
with your mother.
I probably have that coming.
Flap, will you bring
the boys by tomorrow?
I've got that one waiting for me.
I gotta do it.
- Yeah.
- Thanks.
Come on, Pats, I gotta get ready.
Patsy. Make-up!
Is it terrible to say
I can't stand seeing your mother
get her hands on that little girl?
I'd just love to raise
that little girl.
Look, I'd let you,
but Teddy couldn't spare her.
I can't stall any more, all right?
You go out there
and send the boys in.
Well, do I get to say something ever?
No.
We don't have to do that, right?
Come here.
You'll be fine. You will.
It's just this...
You're my touchstone, Emma.
The boys.
Hi. Come on.
I love you. I miss you.
God, I want you to come home.
Close the door.
God, you both look so gigantic to me.
I guess I look pretty bad to you.
Not so bad.
You both have beautiful eyes
and your hair's too long.
I don't care about the back
but keep your bangs cut, OK?
- It's too long.
- That's a matter of opinion.
Just keep it short, all right?
Are you getting well?
Look up.
I'm sorry about this
but I can't help it.
I can't talk too long
or I'll get real upset.
I want you to make a lot of friends.
And be real nice to the girls cos
they'll be important to you, I swear.
We're not afraid of girls,
what makes you think that?
- Well, you may be later on.
- I doubt it.
- Why don't you shut up? Shut up!
- You shut up.
Teddy, give me a kiss, come on.
Tommy, you be sweet. Be sweet.
And stop trying to pretend
like you hate me. It's silly.
I like you.
- Then listen especially close.
- What?
- Listen real hard?
- I said what.
I know you like me. I know it.
For the last year or two,
you've pretended like you hate me.
But I love you very much,
as much as I love anybody,
as much as I love myself.
And in a few years when I haven't
been around to irritate you,
you're gonna remember.
You'll remember when I bought the
baseball glove when we were broke
or when I read you those stories,
or when I let you goof off instead
of mowing the lawn, lots of things.
You're gonna realise
that you love me,
and maybe you'll feel badly because
you never told me, but don't.
I know that you love me.
- So don't do that to yourself, OK?
- OK!
- OK?
- I said OK.
OK, you two should run along.
Take care.
Give me a kiss.
I was so scared,
but I think it went well, don't you?
Yeah?
Tommy, if you need to talk,
your dad will listen.
He's a very smart man, you know.
Just say, "Dad, I'm confused.
I need to have a talk."
You know, I met this boy back in
River Oaks where I live.
He said the Cub Scouts in Houston
are the best ever.
We were never scouts, our mother
was too lazy to check it out.
No! Stop!
Come on! Stop it!
No!
Listen to me! Listen. It's OK, Tom.
It's OK. Now...
Hey! Stop it!
I'm sorry, but I just can't have you
criticising your mother around me.
Mr Horton. Mr Horton?
She's gone.
Oh, God, I'm so stupid. So stupid...
Somehow I thought...
Somehow I thought
when she finally went,
that it would be a relief.
Oh, my sweet, little darling!
Oh, dear. There's nothing harder.
There's nothing...
Do you want some cake?
- Why are you standing over here?
- I don't know.
You wanna come over and sit with me?
Everything's gonna be
all right, Tommy.
There's fantastic
dance schools in Houston.
- Tap?
- Tap, ballet, aerobics...
Anything you want.
Come over here and see your dad.
He really knows a pretty girl,
doesn't he?
She's too old for him.
Are you eating a wet bunny? Here.
Better go on over to Dad and eat it.
Hi, Vern. How are you doing here?
Hi.
I understand you're a swimmer.
Me, too.
But you're an astronaut, right?
I'm an astronaut and a swimmer.
Pretty good-looking suit, there.
A little closer. A little closer.
A little closer.
Do you want to see my pool?
I don't know if the time is right.
You know, funeral and everything.
Oh, I think it is. Come on.
I'll show you the internationally
infamous...uh...Breedlove crawl.
Just a little stroke
I picked up out in space.