1
(DRAMATIC MUSIC)
(BELL RINGING)
(EERIE MUSIC)
(PEOPLE CHEERING)
First off I'd like
to thank everyone
for coming out tonight.
Before the festivities begin.
(CLEARS THROAT)
Tonight marks the
official return
of the Annual
Harvest Hootenanny.
(LAUGHING)
(APPLAUDING)
And as a token of
our appreciation
we offer tonight's,
uh, celebration
of our way to praise the
Lord for all He's done for us
and all He continues to do
for our little town
of Wheary Falls.
(APPLAUDING)
Now as a reminder to all
your trick or treaters
Wheary Farms property
if off limits tonight.
There'll be no adults
there handing out candy.
You'll find plenty of
that right here in town.
Now I want you all
to have fun, be safe
and most all remember the
rules that we discussed.
Now let's all head on
up to the school house
and let the celebration begin!
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(EERIE MUSIC)
Well, you heard the preacher,
he said the barn is
off limits tonight.
What are you chicken?
Is Georgie boy afraid
he might see the
Boogeyman or something?
I'm not chicken.
We just shouldn't be
up here by ourselves.
Well what do you know?
There's a jack-o-lantern
waiting for us.
(EERIE MUSIC)
Okay so?
Preacher said
remember the rules.
Every house handing out candy
has a lit jack-o-lantern
outside the door,
watching and waiting.
(EERIE MUSIC)
So there must be candy in there.
Come on Shirley, let's
just go back to town.
We're gonna miss out
on all the good stuff.
But what if there's
special candy in there?
And we're the only ones brave
enough to come and get it.
(EERIE MUSIC)
(DOOR KNOCKING)
Trick or treat, trick or
treat, trick or treat.
(DOORS RATTLING)
(EERIE MUSIC)
Trick or treat,
smell by feet, give.
(AX WHOOSHES)
(SCREAMING)
(WHIMPERS)
(BLOOD SQUELCHING)
(GARGLING)
(SCREAMING)
(SUSPENSEFUL ROCK MUSIC)
(CHILDREN CHEERING)
[CHILD] Happy Halloween.
[PARENT] Come
on kids, let's go.
And so every
year on Halloween,
the legend of the barn
tells how's evil's released.
It takes the form
of three demons
dressed as trick or
treaters with evil grins.
The Boogeyman wants
to crack your back
and cut you into pieces
to carry in his sack.
The pumpkin man Hallow Jack
wants to carve out your head
and slash you with his
vines until you're dead.
And if you get
scared, don't you cry.
Or the Candy Corn Scarecrow
will surely eat your eyes.
Three knocks on their
door shall set them free
and only if you say the
words trick or treat.
Oh, spooky costumes kids.
Have fun tonight.
Hey where are my treats?
Where's your costume?
Whatever, pumpkins are
lame and so's your story.
Hey whoa, whoa, whoa,
look my bowls empty alright.
There's more treats in
that barrel over there,
why don't you go grab one
from the bottom alright.
(EERIE MUSIC)
(SCREAMING)
(LAUGHING)
Hey.
Hey!
Happy Halloween.
(LAUGHING)
Damn Sam.
You think you could've found
me a tighter pair of shorts.
I mean, I'm gonna have to do
a cavity search for my balls.
Oh man, they're
not that tight.
I still don't get why we
have to scare all the kids
that aren't dressed
like something spooky.
It's because it's
the costume rule Josh.
The whole point of
dressing scary is to fool
whatever's out there into
believing we're one of them.
Trust me.
That kid now knows to dress
scary if he wants candy.
He learned an
important lesson today.
What?
That older kids are dicks.
Probably.
You never know man, maybe
one day it'll save our lives.
If we're ever in a situation
where we need your Halloween
rules to save our lives,
then we're in a
shit ton of trouble.
Why don't you just
get back in your barrel
before another group comes.
Oh, did you hear that?
Another group's coming.
Great.
(DOOR CREAKS)
(EERIE MUSIC)
Mr. Daniels.
I see you're terrifying
the children again.
Trick or treat to
you too Miss Barnhart.
I believe you were
told last Halloween
to stop scaring the children
with your barn tales.
Yes I was asked to stop
scaring them next Halloween.
Seeing as how it's October 30th,
technically it's not Halloween.
Oh.
Very funny Mr. Daniels.
Ha, ha, ha, ha.
(DOLL CRYING)
Now I think you'd
go much further
if you'd just stop with the
excuses and just act your age.
You know what?
I will make you a deal.
I promise to stop scaring
kids with my barn story
if you promise to help me
clean this up and put it away.
Really?
Indeed Mr. Daniels.
It all goes in that
barrel right over there.
That barrel?
Yep.
Okay.
Oh by the way Miss Barnhart.
Yes.
Happy Halloween.
(SCREAMS)
(SCREAMING)
(LAUGHING)
Joshua Harper,
you of all people.
The son of our pastor.
To be celebrating Devil's Night,
what would father
think if he were alive?
If my father was still alive
you wouldn't be trying to
fill his shoes in his Church.
I hope you enjoyed yourself.
Thanks to you two,
Helen's Valley will not
see another Halloween.
And I'll make sure of it.
Thank you for covering
my ass back there.
Do you believe this woman?
It's literally been a
year since my dad died
and she thinks because
she runs his Church
she runs this town.
As long as she's in charge,
I'll never be seen at Church.
Yeah.
And who is she to tell us
that we're too old
to trick or treat?
What?
Oh dude, did you hear that?
I think my dad's home early.
(CHILDREN SHOUTING)
Yep, you got all
this for a minute?
I'm gonna go inside and grab
some garbage bags and stuff.
Sounds good partner.
Yeah, I'm gonna go get
changed before we head out.
Yet again
I am sorry to hear about
all of that Miss Barnhart.
Well if that's what he has
to do to make up to you,
I'll tell him right now.
Yeah, sounds great.
Okay, goodbye.
You want to explain
that phone call?
Dad, she broke the rule.
She never said trick or treat.
Dammit Sam.
For someone who is so bent
on the rules for Halloween
you sure as hell seem lacking
in the rules of responsibility.
Do you realize that
in seven months
you graduate high school?
What does that have to
do with a stupid prank?
Do you really want
your legacy in this town
to be the kid who was
so obsessed with himself
and Halloween that he
didn't know when to grow up.
I thought that when
you and your buddies,
the, uh, Gardeners From
Hell began mowing lawns.
That you were growing
out of your kid phase.
But, low and behold,
when the leaves change
so do your priorities.
You don't get it dude.
I didn't choose to
stop being a kid.
You and everyone else in this
town decided that for me.
Well then, this is
your lucky day pal.
Miss Barnhart knows how much
you enjoy acting like a kid
so that's why she's
giving you the experience
of going door to door and
collecting goods tomorrow night
for the Church's food bank.
Oh and uh, by the way,
enjoy yourself tonight.
Because after tomorrow
you're grounded, dude.
(ROCK MUSIC)
What's doing
So both you guys
have to do it?
Well?
Of course Russ,
I'm the one that jumped
out and scared her.
So what's the 411
on tomorrow huh?
We gonna egg some cars?
Tee-pee some houses?
Have a little ding
dong ditch huh?
Well according to my dad,
after I'm done being a
boy scout I'm grounded.
Uh.
Yeah, but um, we'll
figure something out.
Alright cool, cool.
I'll meet you guys at concessions
in a little bit alright?
Alright man.
Oh hey Sammy,
Michelle's working.
Ooh.
Oh shit what up pops?
Okay, yeah we'll
see you over there.
Skate and whirl!
So, Gardener's From Hell huh?
What?
That's what you said
your dad called us.
Dude, he was just
being a dick weed.
I don't know, it's
not a bad name actually.
It's beats being called
The Bushwhackers.
Mr. Cool
(LAUGHING)
He's Mr. Cool and
knows that true
He's Mr. Cool
Hey, hey Michelle.
Hi.
I will have a slice
of pizza, a cola
and a bag of these.
Anything for you Sam?
Um...
(COUGHS) He'll just
have your phone number.
What?
(GROANS)
Hey Michelle.
I'm gonna take the same.
That's right, yeah.
(LAUGHS) Alright well
you guys can take a seat
and I'll bring it out to you.
Oh and you guys better hurry
up Rock Block's just starting.
Oh yeah, yeah, go go go.
(CHATTERING)
Wig it out if I miss this.
Hello I'm your host Dr. Rock.
And tonight we've got one
of the biggest rock bands
on the music scene here to
make a huge announcement.
All this and more as part
of a spooktacular
Halloween edition
of the Rock Block with
Dr. Rock (LAUGHING).
I wanna tell you
about a guy I know
He runs the best
damn metal show
He plays what
the others fear
The doctor says let's rock
Rock, rock, rock
Rock, rock, Dr. Rock
Rock, rock, rock
Rock, rock, Dr. Rock
You wanted 'em, I got 'em.
The one, the only Demon Inferno.
(LAUGHING)
Always a pleasure, always
a pleasure to see you guys.
You gotta tell us what
is this big announcement
that you came out here on
the Rock Block with Dr. Rock
to tell the world?
Well Doctor.
Tomorrow night, on
Halloween, me and the boys
are gonna be playing a
special show at 11:59 p.m..
So all you kids need to be
there and rock 'n' roll.
Rock 'n' roll that's right.
You heard it hear first
on the Rock Block.
So if you headbangers
wanna get out there
and rock with Demon
Inferno just...
Now that would be a bitching
last Halloween together.
What are you doing?
Listen, we wanna see
this band live right.
Yeah.
And we have to go trick
or treating for Barnhart.
So, why don't we kill
two birds with one stone.
How?
We take a car, drive
towards the concert.
Stop by some town on
the way, trick or treat.
Barnhart didn't say that
the goods couldn't be candy.
It's the ultimate screw you
to her from the both of us.
Yeah, but what about your dad?
Listen, he said
it himself okay.
Once school ends then
everything changes.
Look at this opportunity.
A Demon Inferno concert
and trick or treating.
This could be the night that
makes us legends in this town.
One last hurrah.
One last hurrah.
Well, um, Sam was just saying
how he'd like to see Demon
Inferno tomorrow night
and I was wondering if
y'all liked to tag along.
One last hurrah.
Me, seriously?
Going to see Billy
Michaels live?
My shift ends in 15, we'll talk.
Thanks Sam.
What?
So, how do we
score a ride there?
Going to Long Beach
To get ourselves a treat
(LAUGHING) Look.
Alright so Chris,
I was thinking.
Tomorrow being our one month
anniversary and everything
maybe we could do
something special.
Something other than hiding
from everyone at the drive-in.
Nikki babe, we'll go do
something special soon.
I promise.
Okay.
So is there anything you
had planned for me tonight?
Uh well, you mean
something like this?
(SUSPENSEFUL ROCK MUSIC)
I might say that's something.
(LAUGHS)
Okay.
Oh!
(SCREAMS)
Oh Nikki's ta-ta tittys.
Ah yeah.
What the hells guys?
I was just getting
to second base.
Yeah you were.
Hey listen, can
we borrow your van?
What?
Got another lawn
gate or something?
You know half your
shits still in the back
taking up space from last time.
No, no, no, it's not
a job but we'll pay you.
(LAUGHS) You still owe
me from last time man.
Demon Inferno just rescheduled
their hometown
concert for tomorrow.
Seriously?
- Yeah.
- Oh this is perfect.
Yeah.
What does that mean?
Oh man it means, you
bring the gas money
and I'll bring the party.
(UPBEAT ROCK MUSIC)
Hey Sam, I thought you
said that turn back there
was supposed to be a shortcut?
[SAM] Yeah I'm
telling you it is.
You know what, here,
check the map yourself.
He's right.
All we gotta do is
follow this road.
Oh, uh, Chris.
We have to stop at the
first town we come across
before the concert.
That way we can
get this done okay?
Why don't you just buy the
candy and give it Barnhart?
(LAUGHS) Oh no,
Sammy boy here believes
candy given to you on All
Hallows Eve isn't just candy.
It's candy with
the devil's touch.
What?
Oh yeah, it's just one of
his many rules of Halloween.
Shut the hell up.
What are you talking about?
Oh, you guys will just
think they're stupid.
No, come on tell us.
What about the candy?
(SIGHS) Okay.
So there's this rule about
candy I have called The Treat.
It, uh, you know, say you
knock on someones door
and say trick or treat.
They give you candy, they
pick treat and all is well
and that's their payment
to leave them alone
and not play a trick.
Therefore, it's more
than just candy.
So it's like an offering?
Yeah, exactly.
Oh, alright okay, okay.
Well you got anymore?
Seriously?
Hey, not to cut you guys off
but I think there's
a town up ahead.
(EERIE MUSIC)
[NIKKI] Does that
sign say Deathville?
[CHRIS] Well guys,
I think we may have
found our party spot.
Where is this town?
(BIRDS CAWING)
[MICHELLE] This must be
like an old back entrance
or something, maybe that's
why the road is closed.
I'm not finding it on the map.
I mean it's not uncommon.
A lot of these old towns
have been forgotten
since the highways came through.
(EERIE MUSIC)
Well there you go Sammy
boy, one last hurrah right?
Well there it is.
Your last hurrah.
(EERIE MUSIC)
[DR. ROCK] This is Dr. Rock
reminding you to
buy your tickets
for the Demon Inferno
Halloween concert.
Buy your tickets tonight.
Alright Sam, your turn.
Truth or dare.
Hold on a second Nixer,
I just gotta know,
out of curiosity.
Where's the old
egging houses thing
fall into your list
of rules Sammy boy?
Hey that's right, you
never finished your list.
Come on, it's Halloween.
- Tell the rest of 'em.
- Yeah come on Sam, tell us.
- Yeah dude.
- Come on.
That one's called The Trick,
it's a means of causing
mischief or retaliation
to whoever doesn't
make offerings.
Tell me you got a
rule about partying?
(LAUGHING)
Yeah I do actually,
it's called The Harvest.
It's a way for people to
thank the gods for their crops
through celebration and
sometimes even human sacrifices.
Is that it?
Yeah, that's it.
No, no no no, tell 'em the
one you call The Golden Rule.
Ooh.
[MICHELLE] Golden Rule, that
sounds pretty interesting.
Yeah, it's actually called
Never Trick The Treat.
You see it's when
a treat is given
and the trick's played
on the giver afterwards.
See if you truly
believe in evil,
you never want to break
a deal on Halloween.
This is the one
night of the year
the devil can come for you.
It's a good thing I don't
believe in any of that shit.
I mean, it's just
like that barn legend
we heard about growing up.
[NIKKI] Yeah, how did
that rhyme go again?
Oh it was something like
the Boogyeman will twist
your tits backwards
whilst Hallow Jack
plows your butt
and the Candy Corn
Scarecrow busts his nut.
(GROANING)
Cream corn.
- (LAUGHING)
- Ew.
You know it's bullshit right?
It's just some story
made up by farmers
to keep kids off
their properties.
Why do you think we're the
only ones out here tonight?
What's your fascination
with this story anyway Sam?
You mean obsession?
No, seriously.
Seriously?
My grandfather heard the story
when he was a teenager
working in the mines.
So every year on Halloween
he'd tell me the tale.
All October I couldn't go to
the sleep with lights off.
All I could think about was
Hallow Jack carving my
head out like a pumpkin,
and the Candy Corn Scarecrow
ripping out my eyes.
But, it was the thought
of the Boogeyman.
That was the thought that kept
me from trick or treating.
So, I just kind of
made up these rules
from traditions in books
and used them for
protection on Halloween.
I don't know, stupid
kids stuff I guess.
Yeah it is.
(LAUGHS)
No it's not, it's cute.
Please a miner, a
scarecrow, a pumpkin man?
Come on dude.
It's not even possible to carve
someone's skull out anyways.
Guys can we just
get back to the game.
Sam truth or dare?
Dare.
I think I've said enough
truth for a night.
I dare you to go
up to the barn door,
knock three times and
say trick or treat.
Hey, that sounds like fun.
Why don't we all do it with him?
I mean it is
Halloween after all.
(EERIE MUSIC)
(SIGHS)
[CHRIS] Well guys
we knock on the door
and say trick or treat.
Three times, that's
the rule right?
[SAM] How about if
we just do it twice?
Dude, this legend in bogus.
Monster's aren't real.
[JOSH] Yeah.
Give me your hand Sam,
I'll show you once and for all
there's no such thing
as the Boogeymman.
(SIGHS)
(DOOR KNOCKING)
[TOGETHER] Trick or treat.
(WOOD RATTLING)
(WOOD CREAKING)
Trick or treat.
(EERIE MUSIC)
Trick or treat.
(BIRDS CAWING)
See Sam, nothing.
(DOORS RATTLING)
What the hell?
[CHRIS] Dude, I you
said it was locked?
It was.
Hey, don't go in there.
Don't go in there man.
It's alright.
Dude, what is he doing?
What, what is he doing?
Yeah guys, maybe this really
is the barn of the light.
(SHOUTS)
(LAUGHS)
Ah, too easy.
Son of a bitch.
Son of a bitch.
(EERIE MUSIC)
Russ, you okay?
Check this place out.
It's a lot bigger than
it looks from the outside.
(ELECTRICS BUZZ)
Check out the bitching mower.
That is totally grody.
(FLIES BUZZING)
Someone better check the
expiration date on those.
Russ?
You okay man?
(DOOR CREAKS)
(EERIE MUSIC)
Boo!
(LAUGHING)
[SAM] Shit dude.
(EERIE MUSIC)
[RUSS] Ah that was good one.
[SAM] Gross,
this must have been a
slaughterhouse or something.
[JOSH] Why do you say that?
[SAM] 'Cause it
smells like rotten meat.
[RUSS] Yeah
seriously, barf-a-rama.
I don't know boys,
but y'all should probably
head back into town.
Times a ticking and
y'all got about an hour
before this van books out.
Chill dude, we'll
be back in time.
I'll grab you a
costume Michelle.
What about you Russ,
you coming along?
Nah, you go have fun.
I think I'm gonna
hang here and veg.
And try to figure out
where the hell that
smells coming from.
Alright, well
have fun with that.
(UPBEAT ROCK MUSIC)
(CHICKENS CLUCKING)
Damn.
(EERIE MUSIC)
Grody.
To the max.
Shit Sam, you scared
the hell out of me.
Hey, kill that light, I
found a fucking head yo.
Seriously Sam what the...
(MOANING)
Oh shit!
(THUDDING)
(CHICKENS CLUCKING)
(EERIE MUSIC)
(ROCK MUSIC)
So what's this big surprise?
Take your blindfold off.
[NIKKI] Christopher,
this is awesome.
When did you do all this?
I found it while you and
your gal pal were chatting.
You know, I figured if someone
went through all this trouble
to leave it out here, we might
as well make some use of it.
You know, stare at the stars.
Snuggle up on this Hallow night.
You're too romantic.
But, the real reason I
brought you out for, was this.
Oh my god, Christopher.
It's beautiful, thank you.
So, where did we leave off?
I believe you were
rounding first base,
on your way to second.
That's right.
I think I just got my
seventh inning stretch.
(LAUGHS)
(ROCK MUSIC)
Bringing out
the devil inside
My, my, my she's
a devil inside
She's a lover,
she's a killer
She's a vixen, she's
a sinner with a smile
Oh
One part brains
and two parts sin
Oh
You invite temptation,
but you're never gonna win
(ELECTRICAL CRACKLING)
Mark my words can't you see
Oh oh
Just a kind of a angel
Just a kind of angel
(WOLF HOWLING)
Summer is setting and the
moon is ready for fall
You're looking pretty evil
And you may not hail
the devil on Halloween
(CHILDREN CHEERING AND SHOUTING)
There's a chill in the air
and I'm getting kind of scared
Halloween
Got the uh, toilet paper?
Affirmative.
You got the eggs,
you got the M-80's?
Double affirmative.
What do you boys have planned?
Ooh tonight it's about reclaiming
what was taken from us.
Anybody that tells
us we're too old
to go trick or treating is
getting a face full of yolk
and a tree full of tee pee.
[MICHELLE] And the M-80's?
Them be for pumpkins.
Okay, alright.
Whoa, Wheary Falls huh?
Apparently that's
Deathville's real name.
(CHILDREN SHOUTING)
Trust me when I say it.
Stay away from them pumpkins.
This is how they watch us.
(ROCK MUSIC)
Oh no no, no no, every year.
Yeah well, you'll
thank me tomorrow
when you're all still alive.
Oh hi kids, great costumes.
Oh, no way.
(DEMONIC LAUGHING)
Okay so let me
ask you a question.
[CHRIS] (laughs)
Anything babe.
What's your whole take on
Michelle and her virgin act?
It's, it's no act.
She's an honest
to God good girl.
I think there's
someone watching us.
Where?
You know I bet it's
Russell, freaking pervert.
Bet that hose has been
watching us the whole time.
Give me a sec babe.
I'm gonna go follow him
and tell him something.
(BIRDS CAWING)
(MUMBLING)
Chris, is that you?
This isn't funny.
(BIRDS CAWING)
Screw this, I'm going
back to the van.
(EERIE MUSIC)
(GASPS)
Russell you scared
the shit out of me.
What are you wearing?
Can you even see out of that?
Anyways, Chris is looking for
you and he's super pissed.
How'd you even
get this thing on?
(ZIP ZIPS)
(MUMBLING)
(LAUGHING)
(SCREAMING)
(SCYTHE WHOOSHES)
(ROCK MUSIC)
Help!
(SCREAMING)
(MUMBLING)
(LAUGHING)
(SCREAMING)
(BLOOD SQUELCHES)
(LAUGHS) Oh.
Oh man.
I'll tell you
one thing for sure,
no one is ever gonna forget
the tale of Sam and Josh.
Two guys took on Bitchy
Barnhart and destroyed her.
I mean, that's one heck of
a legacy to leave behind.
Kids are gonna be talking
about you guys forever.
[SAM'S DAD] Do you really
want your legacy in this town
to be the kid who was so obsessed
with himself and Halloween
that he didn't know
when to grow up?
Yeah.
Yeah, I was thinking of.
You mind waiting for up Josh,
I gotta go back and get
those houses you know.
They had some
pretty good treats.
And double up on some.
(GROWLS)
I'll be right back, I'm
gonna get you for that.
(LAUGHING)
So, what do you think?
He's great.
What?
Oh you mean trick,
trick or treating.
It's, it's awesome, I, um.
(MOANS)
If I told you something
could you keep it a secret?
I think I can handle a secret.
Okay well, I've kind of had
a crush on Sam for a while now
and I'm not, I'm not
really sure about it.
[JOSH] What aren't
you sure about?
I'm not sure if he likes me,
or if he's just
being nice to me.
What do you think?
I think you should follow
your heart on this one.
(EERIE MUSIC)
Hey penis breath,
you were pretty fast
getting back here
but I know it was
you watching us.
Oh, you're not Russell.
(KNIFE THUDDING)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
Hey uh, um.
I'm looking for the guy that
was wearing those headphones.
What the fuck?
(WATER SPLASHING)
(METAL SQUEAKING)
(DRAMATIC MUSIC)
(GROANING)
(BLOOD SQUELCHING)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
What the fuck?
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(GROANING)
(LAUGHING)
(MUMBLING)
(LAUGHING)
Nikki!
(EERIE MUSIC)
Nikki!
Fuck man where?
Oh.
No, no, no, no fucking.
Holy shit.
I'm so sorry.
Oh shit.
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(GROANING)
(BIRDS CAWING)
(MUMBLING)
(GROANING)
Fuck.
Keep going.
(GROANING)
(MUMBLING)
[SAM] So um, you
having fun tonight?
[MICHELLE] No.
Oh.
(LAUGHS) It's exactly how
I thought it would be, you?
I didn't think this night
could get much radder, you know.
You being here, this is, this
is the best Halloween ever.
I'm so glad you invited me.
Me too.
(SUSPENSEFUL ROCK MUSIC)
Well Sam boy, that's it.
Mission accomplished.
Damn Sam, look at
your candy sack.
Did you really go back to
every house for seconds?
This, this is nothing.
What's in it, let me see.
I don't think that...
Is that Chris?
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
Hey have you seen anyone
dressed like the devil
and the grim reaper?
Oh what.
Oh shit.
Now why would Chris be
running down the street?
Come on guys let's go.
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
Oh.
Hey what the hell man?
(LAUGHING)
(LAUGHS) Did that guy
just steal your candy sack?
Yeah.
Well what are we
waiting for dude.
Yeah but, did you
see their faces?
Yeah Sam, they're
dressed like your demons.
So we gonna cover their
faces in egg yolk or what?
Let's just forget
about it guys,
we don't know these people.
Dammit, there was more
than just candy in that bag.
Let's go to the
school house party
I heard people talking about.
I'm sure there's gonna be
candy with the devils
touch on it there.
Fine, but only for five
minutes and then we gotta split.
We can't miss this concert.
Hey.
Wait up.
(EERIE MUSIC)
[TV ANNOUNCER] Hey you,
don't touch that dial.
There's much more
madness to come
here at Monster Madness
on Channel Three.
(LAUGHING)
[TV ACTOR] There's
a radio on the truck.
(DOOR KNOCKING)
Hmm?
More trick or treaters.
[TV ACTOR] This gasoline truck
came speeding right
across the road.
Hmm.
[TV ACTOR] Their must've
been 10, 15 of these things
chasing after it.
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(GROANING)
(MUMBLING)
You kids scared me to death.
Your costumes are great,
they're so realistic.
I bet you want some
more apples don't you.
Did you come in here
for some more apples?
Here you go.
(SNIFFING)
(GROANING)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(SCREAMING)
(BLOOD SQUELCHES)
(LAUGHING)
(EERIE MUSIC)
(DISTANT ROCK MUSIC)
(FIREWORK WHOOSHING)
(FIREWORKS POPPING)
(ROCK MUSIC)
(PEOPLE CHATTERING)
Harvest Hootenanny.
Alright.
Band on the run
(LAUGHING)
(APPLAUDING)
Hello everyone, it's
good to see all your faces
out there in the crowd
tonight again this year.
I won't make this long
'cause I know we're all
eager to enjoy ourselves.
Tonight marks the
30th anniversary
of what's become known as the
Annual Harvest Hootenanny.
Who's ready to let the
festivities continue?
(CHEERING)
Thank you preacher.
Here's one you all know.
Sing along with me.
(ROCK MUSIC)
(CHEERING)
You're the guy who likes
to smash pumpkins huh?
Indeed.
George Hayward's the name.
Smashing them pumpkins
is the best way
to keep those god damn
demons from coming into town.
Wait.
What did you just say?
Wait a minute, you two
don't look familiar at all.
It's, it's the costumes.
It throws everyone off.
What were you just saying?
Something about
those damn demons?
(CLAPPING)
(ROCK MUSIC)
Burst through the hands
And turn it into a stage
Death comes out of nowhere
There were drums,
bass and guitar
The dreams are
sorted nightly
As they try to get a roar
Crowds in terror
lock their doors
And mashing out their names
If you look your
daughters room
You'll watch him do the same
He comes in all sizes
Comes from miles
and miles around
Just to hear the
honky tonky sound
That children's rhyme
has glorified those beasts
for way too long now.
So I'm gonna tell you guys
this for your own protection.
You see, the part many
folks don't realize is,
it was the devil himself that
sent those creatures here
to take the flesh of
the living back to hell.
Okay, see you in a few, bye.
Matthew.
[GEORGE] The miner, the
one they call the Boogeyman.
(GLASS SMASHES)
He's the Devil's right hand man.
In the beginning he was
in charge of digging
that godforsaken tunnel
out of hell into our world.
You're probably too
young to remember
the mining incident in the 30's.
But I believe those miners
stumbled upon that tunnel.
(GROANING)
(GASPS)
(BLOOD SQUELCHES)
(GARGLING)
Oh yeah, so that's why he's
dressed like a miner too.
Digging holes and stuff, yeah.
What, what do you
know about Hallow Jack?
The pumpkin man?
Oh he's the watcher.
He can take anyone of those
pumpkins out of his patch
and use them for his eyes
to watch over the land.
He signals the other ones
of approaching flesh.
[SAM] So he's like a,
he's like a guard dog huh?
(CRUNCHING)
(SCREAMING)
(BLOOD SQUELCHING)
(CRACKLING)
So that's why you were
smashing pumpkins.
Or just because
he's a crazy drunk.
But, let's just.
Tell us what you know about
uh, the Candy Corn Scarecrow.
The straw man, well he's
the protector of the harvest.
He makes sure the crops
grow right and stay safe.
He'll chew up anything with
those rotten teeth of his,
that try to enter that
ground, to harm that corn.
(SCREAMING)
So how exactly do you know
so much about all this again?
Because, when I
was a younger boy
I watched them slaughter
my best friend Shirley.
I'm sure y'all realize by now
that no one around
here believes me.
They all think that she died
from some equipment accident
that night at the barn.
So why didn't they kill you?
I don't know.
It's like they just didn't
see me or something.
Where you wearing
a mask or something?
Come on, this guy's
obviously had one too many.
Maybe I have son,
but I've earned it.
For the last three decades,
I've done everything I could
to keep those creatures
from coming into town.
But nobody here appreciates
it because nobody believes it.
I can relate.
Here you go boys.
[SAM] Thanks Michelle.
[MICHELLE] Hmm-mm.
Thanks.
So, if you've
seen these monsters
then you know where the barn is?
Sam we gotta jam, we
don't even have tickets yet.
Would you stop spazzing about
the concert for one minute?
You know what?
I've had enough.
I know you're hoping for some
validation from this guy,
but you need to accept it Sam.
Your dad's right.
You need to grow up and
forget about all this crap.
Are you kidding me?
You too?
Okay boys let's just chill out
before we say
something we regret.
No it's okay Michelle.
Go ahead Sam,
what's your damage?
Ever since your dad died
you've been this completely
different person.
Oh yeah.
You just want me to
believe in all this
Halloween legend mumbo-jumbo,
that's all this is about.
But while we're being honest,
why don't you
inform Michelle here
that I'm the reason
she came along.
Because you weren't
gonna ask her.
What?
Is that true Sam?
Kind of.
It's not like I didn't
want you to come along.
I'm going back to the van.
[SAM] Michelle wait.
Well how about this whole
trick or treating punishment
was for me and for me alone.
You didn't have to come along.
So you lied to me?
You made me dress
up like an idiot?
Hey man, you made
the assumption.
(LAUGHS) Unbelievable.
For years I've saved your ass.
Well guess what, I'm out.
And I'm keeping the
candy, so suck it.
Fine.
Go.
(METAL SCRAPING)
(DOOR RATTLING)
(ROCK MUSIC)
(CHEERING)
Sam!
Chris?
What are you, what
are you doing here?
Russell, Nikki,
they're all dead man.
The legends real, I
saw the Boogeyman.
I watched him eat a
fucking face burger
made out of Russell's head.
[SAM] What?
Three of 'em, just
like the legend said,
they followed me into town.
Now everybody's gone,
they're all dead.
(EERIE MUSIC)
(WOOD CREAKING)
(ROCK MUSIC)
People yeah
(CHEERING)
(LAUGHING)
Yeah!
(CHEERING)
Here's another one for ya.
(BLOOD SQUELCHES)
(SCREAMING)
(GROANING)
(AX THUDS)
(STRING TWANGS)
(SCREAMING)
(SCREAMING)
(SCREAMS)
(BLOOD SQUELCHES)
(SCREAMING)
Holy shit.
(LAUGHING)
You burned me good.
I'm gonna go get
my candy back now.
(SCREAMING)
(DOOR THUDDING)
Hey ugly.
Jokes over buddy, I
want my candy back now.
Are you deaf penis?
Give me the bag.
(GROANING)
(COUGHING)
(SCREAMING)
(GROANING)
(BLOOD SQUELCHES)
(CRUNCHING)
(SCREAMING)
(WATER SPLASHING)
(GURGLING)
(SCREAMING)
Come on, come on.
[MAN] Go, go come on!
[MAN] Oh my god!
(ZIP ZIPS)
(GROANS)
(SCREAMING)
(BLOOD SQUELCHING)
(LIQUID BOILING)
(LIQUID SPLASHING)
(SCREAMING)
What do you want you freak?
(BLOOD SQUELCHES)
(GARGLING)
(GROANS)
(SCYTHE WHOOSHES)
(BLOOD SQUELCHES)
Screw this guys, I'm
going back to the van.
(KEYS CLINK)
(SUSPENSEFUL ROCK MUSIC)
(SCREAMING)
(SCREAMS)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(BONES CRACKING)
(THUDDING)
(BLOOD SPLASHES)
(KNIFE WHOOSHES)
(SCREAMING)
(BONES CRACKING)
[MAN] Stop.
Oh my god!
Oh my God!
(BLOOD SQUELCHES)
What are they doing?
They're collecting
their treats.
What do you think this
night's all about?
That flesh is for the devil.
I knew it was only
a matter of time
before they'd come into
town for a feeding.
Is there anyway to stop them?
You can't.
As long as there's
flesh to take back.
They're not gonna stop
'til whoever knocked on
that doors ground meat.
We gotta find Michelle
before those creatures do.
There is one more option boys.
They only have 'til midnight.
So if I can stop
'em from collecting,
maybe there's a chance
that'll stop the feeding.
(SUSPENSEFUL ROCK MUSIC)
Come on.
Come on.
Get back.
Back.
Come on.
We gotta help him.
[SAM] How man?
They'll kill us.
I don't know.
Think, you know
all the traditions.
Just give me a
minute to think.
Put your mask on.
Look around man, no one
else is left standing
they aren't dressed scary.
(GROANING)
(BLOOD SQUELCHES)
(SCREAMING)
(BLOOD SQUELCHING)
(GROANING)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
Oh shit, Jesus Christ.
(MELANCHOLY MUSIC)
Holy shit that worked.
I tried boys.
They were just too
strong together.
If you want any chance
of saving your friends,
you gotta get back to that barn.
Here, I don't know what this is,
it was on the miner's neck.
It might be important.
I found this too.
I'm a goner boys.
You freed me from this burden.
Just do me one more favor.
Send those motherfuckers
back to hell.
(SOBBING)
The plan is we
stop the feeding.
Shouldn't we be
searching the barn
for Michelle and Chris first?
No.
If we go in that barn
we're all goners.
You saw what happened to George
when he took them
all on at once.
Wait.
He said they were all
protectors of different places.
And what does that
have to do with anything?
We go to the
places they protect
and we call them out one by one.
So how do we get
their attention?
We follow my rules.
We knocked on that barn door
and we said trick or treat.
And guess what?
They didn't give us a treat.
So we give them a trick.
Exactly.
(SUSPENSEFUL ROCK MUSIC)
Harder and faster
On the edge of disaster
Take a chance when
you roll the dice
Harder and faster
On the edge of disaster
Turn it up never let it die
Harder and faster
On the edge of disaster
Motherfucking
spark in your eye
Harder and faster
On the edge of the disaster
Turn it up never let it die
(EERIE MUSIC)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
Well, here's
the pumpkin patch.
I guess this is where
Hallow Jack waits
for a person's flesh.
How are we gonna draw him out?
Here, here give me an egg.
Give me an egg.
Come on man, come on,
hurry, give me an egg.
This ought to piss him off.
(GROANING)
(EGG SPLATTERING)
(WIND HOWLING)
(MELANCHOLY MUSIC)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
[CHRIS] It's not even possible
to carve someone's
skull out anyways.
(RETCHING)
(EERIE MUSIC)
(SOBBING)
Did you hear that?
[SAM] What?
(EERIE MUSIC)
(GROANS)
Josh?
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(GROANS)
(GROANING)
(GROANS)
(CRACKLING)
What's up?
(SCREECHING)
Huh?
(CRACKLING)
It doesn't just see
through the pumpkins,
it becomes them.
Josh, we need to start
smashing pumpkins.
(SUSPENSEFUL ROCK MUSIC)
(PUMPKINS SPLATTERING)
(PANTING)
Is that all of 'em?
(CRACKLING)
[SAM] Yeah I'm pretty sure.
Well that was easy.
Yeah.
(CRACKLING)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(BRANCHES WHOOSHING)
(GROANING)
What the?
What the hell is this?
Josh?
[JOSH] Sam?
(GROANING)
Go!
(GROANING)
[SAM] Josh, Josh quick.
Pump it, pump it.
[JOSH] It's stuck.
Just pump it!
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(WEEDKILLER HISSES)
(SCREECHING)
(PANTING)
I can't believe that worked.
I can't believe that worked.
Holy shit.
(GROANING)
Come on.
It worked, it worked.
(EERIE MUSIC)
(GARGLING)
(GROANING)
(PUMPKIN SPLATTERS)
Ew.
(SCREECHING)
Josh.
Light the M-80's.
Let's make some pumpkin pie.
[JOSH] See you
later alligator.
(EXPLOSION BOOMS)
(GROANS)
(LAUGHING)
We did it.
I can't believe that worked.
Now what?
Uh, we get to the corn field.
(EERIE MUSIC)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
Come on let's burn
this mother down.
(BIRDS CAWING)
Shh, shh.
Did you hear that?
(GASPS)
Nikki.
Where are you you
Candy Corn bastard!
[SAM] Josh.
Come on!
Josh, shut up.
We don't know what else
is out in that field.
Calm down.
(BIRDS CAWING)
(CORN RUSTLING)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
I'm gonna kill you.
Yeah, yeah.
He's mine.
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(METAL CLINKING)
(GROANING)
Eat shit and die.
(SPUTTERING)
(CRACKLING)
That was for Nikki.
Sam, light up that corn stock.
Let's what this piece
of shit straw man burn.
(METAL WHOOSHES)
(THUDDING)
Josh!
Sam.
(LAUGHING)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(LAUGHING)
No!
(GROANING)
(CRACKLING)
(LAUGHING)
Ew.
(GROANS)
(MOANING)
Josh?
[JOSH] Sam, Sam!
Josh!
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
Josh!
No!
Come back.
No.
No, no no no no.
Josh.
Josh.
(SOBBING)
(SCREAMS)
(SOBBING)
(SOBBING)
I can't do this alone.
(ENGINE REVVING)
(EERIE MUSIC)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(BRAKES SQUEAL)
(GROANS)
(GROANING)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(ENGINE REVVING)
(BRAKES SQUEAL)
(GROANING)
(CRACKLING)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(DISTANT SCREAMING)
(EERIE MUSIC)
As I said before, a
special evening is upon us.
It was not that long ago now,
but I can still
remember the night
that He came to me
and said He had heard my
unanswered prayers for help.
He said He would
restore our soil
and help us bring
back our harvest
if only we would help restore
what had been taken from Him.
Now every Halloween, curious
teenagers come to these doors
in search of our legend and
to fall prey to our plan.
As I said before, a
special evening is upon us.
Because at midnight tonight,
when the harvest moon
shines at its brightest.
The Lord will rise from His
pits to collect His treats.
(LAUGHS) He's especially
going to like this one.
Come on my dear (LAUGHING).
(GROANING)
You are going to be the treat
that he saves 'til last.
(SCREAMING)
(LAUGHING)
Oh I see one of our
protectors has returned.
Is that what's left
of the teenagers?
Ah, then let the ceremony begin.
Oh Lord we offer
these gifts to You.
- Except this virgins strength.
- No.
For all that You
have done for us
and a token of
Your appreciation.
(SOBBING)
What the?
Everybody stand still.
Don't move or I'll
cut his head off,
just like I did your scarecrow.
Son, I think
you're outnumbered.
(SOBBING)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(GROWLING)
(GRUNTING)
(SCREAMING)
(LAUGHING)
(GROANING)
(BLOOD SQUELCHING)
Sam!
You're still alive.
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(GROANING)
It's time to harvest bitch.
(ENGINE REVVING)
(SOBBING)
Get away from her.
Come on.
Josh, come on let's go.
I got it Sam, just
get in the van and go.
What?
Someone's gotta stay and
make sure the feeding ends.
Just go.
- No!
- Both of you.
Come on.
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(GROWLING)
(GROANS)
(BLOOD SQUELCHING)
Take this.
Okay.
Get in the van.
I need you to wear this.
Sam, I know he said to
go but we can't leave him.
They need you now, okay.
You've become part
of the feeding.
If you don't go, it won't end.
Alright look,
you're gonna drive.
You're gonna drive
as far as you can.
You're gonna find a payphone,
you're gonna call for help
and you're gonna keep driving.
No, I'm not gonna
leave you here.
(MELANCHOLY MUSIC)
You have to.
If I don't make it back,
make sure Barnhart gets this.
I wanna be remembered for
doing the right thing.
Now go.
Drive.
(ENGINE REVVING)
Why would you do this?
You're supposed to
be a man of God.
I am a man of God.
Just not your God.
He betrayed us and
left us with nothing.
Well what's the point
in having a harvest
if your whole town is dead.
What are you talking about?
Your protectors.
They did a lot more
killing than protecting
at your town dance tonight.
Impossible.
Well they're all dead now.
You may have convinced them
the barn was condemned
and dangerous.
But they didn't
believe in the legend
and that's what made
them weak and helpless.
Hey.
I wouldn't do that
if I were you.
Sam.
What are you doing here?
Where's Michelle?
I sent her to go get help.
But we gotta bigger
fish to fry than him.
[JOSH] Give me the weedkiller.
The Boogeyman's
still out there man.
(PUMP SQUEAKING)
Oh Heavenly Father
I pray for Your
guidance and protection.
Bless this festival
with your presence
and purify everything
it touches.
No!
(WEEDKILLER HISSES)
Is that all the flesh?
The rest of it
is in the basement.
It's almost midnight and
you'll never find the key.
You mean this key?
Fools do you
realize the flesh...
- Josh!
- You must be...
(GROANS)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(GROANS)
What did I just do?
He's one of them.
You did what you had to do.
Listen it's almost midnight man.
We've gotta to the basement
and get the rest of that flesh.
Hey, I got it, I
got it right here.
Give me the tank.
(FLIES BUZZING)
(EERIE MUSIC)
I found it.
(BLOOD DRIPPING)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(GROANING)
(DOOR RATTLING)
(GROANING)
(MUMBLING)
(PUMP SQUEAKING)
(METAL CLANGS)
(GROANING)
(PANTING)
(WEEDKILLER HISSING)
(GROANING)
No!
(PICKAX CLANGS)
(GROANING)
(BLOOD DRIPPING)
(GASPS)
(PANTING)
(EERIE MUSIC)
I'm not afraid of you anymore.
(GROANING)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(BONES CRACKING)
(GROANING)
(SCREAMS)
(GROANING)
(WEEDKILLER HISSING)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(GROANING)
(SPUTTERING)
(ELECTRICS BUZZING)
(WHIMPERING)
What?
(SCREECHING)
Sam!
(DOOR THUDDING)
Sam, Sam!
Is he dead?
Yeah, he's, he's dead.
What about the flesh?
It's done.
I think I found
the hole to hell.
[SAM] We gotta go come on.
Come on, we gotta go.
(GROANING)
Come on!
Come on.
(WOOD RATTLING)
(METAL CLINKS)
Wait, what's that smell?
Dude, the barn's on fire.
[JOSH] You gotta
be kidding me,
there's gotta be
another way out.
(FLAMES CRACKLING)
You gotta be kidding me.
There's no doors,
there's no windows.
(FLAMES CRACKLING)
It's over Josh,
there's no way out.
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(GROANING)
(BLOOD SQUELCHING)
(GROANING)
(SPUTTERING)
(GROANING)
(CRACKLING)
Hey Boogeyman.
(GARGLING)
Trick or treat bitch.
It's over.
We stopped it.
So no more feeding?
[SAM] No more feeding.
But we still gotta
find a way out of here.
Oh, Sam.
I think I need to sit down.
Okay, come on.
(MELANCHOLY MUSIC)
(GROANING)
Michelle went to go find help.
Someone will come for us.
(GROANING)
You know, if we make
it out of here alive,
I don't think I'm gonna go
trick or treating again.
Yeah me either.
Hmm, I actually think I might
start going back to
Church on Sunday.
(LAUGHING)
(SCREECHING)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(GROANING)
What time is it?
It's 11:59.
I thought you said it was over.
We followed all your rules
Sam, what's going on?
(GROANS) We're not done yet.
(GROANING)
(DOOR CREAKS)
The flesh was the devil's treat
in return for the
town's harvest.
We tricked the treat.
We broke the Golden Rule.
(DISTANT GROWLING)
So, you think we'll still
be legends after tonight?
Yeah, but with our luck they'll
probably just remember us
as the Gardeners From Hell.
(LAUGHS)
(GROWLING)
(SUSPENSEFUL ROCK MUSIC)
(SHOUTING)
Gotta do something
with our lives
No real powers to provide
No education
Just sweet time
Now we mow lawns
Just to survive
We are the
Gardeners From Hell
We are your gardeners
Rev up the engine
'Til they're clear
The blade is sharp
and the body is clean
I love my evil
lawn mowing machine
'Cause it mows a mean lawn
And we make a great team
I didn't pay attention
to the Golden Rule
Without the lawnmower
It's not cool
Gonna wash my
face when I ate
'Cause I touched the cement
straight to meal time eh
Hey hey
We are the
Gardeners From Hell
We are the
Gardeners From Hell
We are your gardeners
(RADIO STUTTERING)
Oh baby
It's too late to
tell me you're sorry
I've made up mind
and you're history
Too late
You can't play the runaway
It's not what I want
You leave me so lonely
You push me to the
edge and it's too late
(CRACKLING)
(SUSPENSEFUL ROCK MUSIC)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(SUSPENSEFUL ROCK MUSIC)
Your wanted
One lifetime
Three demons burning baby
Killing friends
They'll get you
They'll paint over it again
Where you run,
where you hide
They're all coming
for your life
There's no question
you will die baby
Were your end
is found tonight
Don't let flames
Let's hold on
On this moon rising dead man
Dark evil
To seize you
All Hallows Eve is calling
Where you run,
where you hide
They are coming
for your life
There's no question
you will die baby
Were your end
is found tonight
Where you run,
where you hide
They are coming
for your life
There's no question
will die baby
Were your end
is found tonight