1
Frankie:
I had it all planned.
[Mid-tempo music plays]
College, a place of my own...
hang out all day in cafes
with beautiful girls with legs
and blond hair
that you could talk to about
The Stranglers and Hemingway
and who you could spend loads
of time in bed with.
Instead, I've blown my exams.
How absolute was Louis XIV?
Absolutely no idea.
Oh, God.
I've ruined my life
before it's even started.
They might as well take me out
and shoot me.
If I fail,
I'm gonna have to get a job.
I'm not cut out for that.
I'm too young to work.
Your time is up.
Now, put down your pens.
[Sighs]
Look at them... Jayne Wayne
and Romy Thomas,
the fruit of the gods.
I'm never gonna slow dance
on a moonlit beach
and whisper, "I love you,
Romy... or Jayne,"
whichever one I happen
to be dancing with.
No, I'm looking
at a life sentence,
solitary confinement.
What am I gonna do?
[Introduction to Thin Lizzy's
"Jailbreak" plays]
[All shouting]
Aaaaaahhhhhh!
[Laughter]
# Tonight there's gonna be
a jailbreak #
- # Somewhere in this town #
- [All shouting]
# See, me and the boys,
we don't like it #
# So we're gettin' up
and goin' down #
- # Hidin' low,
lookin' right to left #
- [Laughter]
# If you see us comin',
I think it's best #
# To move away,
do you hear what I say? #
# From under my breath #
- # Tonight there's gonna be
a jailbreak #
- [All shouting]
# Somewhere in the town #
# Tonight there's gonna be
a jailbreak #
# So don't you be around #
# Tonight there's gonna be
trouble #
# I'm gonna find myself in #
# Tonight there's gonna be
trouble #
# So, woman,
stay with a friend #
Whoa!
# You know it's safer #
Whoo!
[Laughs]
# Breakout! #
- [Guitar solo]
- [Sirens wailing]
[Laughing,
talking indistinctly]
Whoo!
Whoo-oo-oo!
[Girls giggling]
[Wailing continues]
Get down!
Come on, get down!
Please!
Hey, lads,
come on, get down.
Now, lads, boys.
Come on, get down.
Now, boys, come on.
Come on!
Please!
Shit!
[Wailing continues]
Hey, lads, come back!
Come back!
[Sea gulls crying;
soft, soothing music plays]
[Sea gulls crying;
soft, soothing music plays]
[Dog barking]
17 years I've been waiting
for this day.
Freedom...
The oyster of my life
about to open.
Instead, it feels like
a badger died in my stomach.
[Footsteps approaching,
door opens]
And I have an awful feeling
that nothing will ever change.
[Echoing] You,
Frankie Griffin, are
a useless article.
You don't do
a hand's turn
from one end of the day
to the other.
Look at the state of ya...
eyes fallin' out of your head
with the drink.
[Sniffs]
And the smell off ya.
[Rustling]
You'd never think of helping
out around the place,
not in a million years.
- [Floorboards creak]
- What do you think?
You think your shirts and
trousers get washed by magic
and march down the path
and throw themselves
up on the line?
Do you?!
And what about these socks
I keep finding under your bed?
Stained with what,
I'd like to know.
[Discordant notes play]
Ray's the only one
of you with any decency!
I was too soft to use
the wooden spoon on your arse
when you were growing up.
I should have had you
put to sleep.
[Hinges creak]
[Door slams]
Today's the 30th of June.
My exam results should come
on the 18th of August.
God, that's not long.
49 days, then I'm dead.
If I was a real rebel,
I wouldn't give a damn.
[Horn honking]
[Honking continues]
Ma!
It's Da.
[Emergency brake engages]
[Birds chirping]
[Horn blares]
- Come forth, my family.
- Da!
- Come forth...
- [Laughter, dog barking]
...and see what treasures
thy father has brought thee.
- Nice hat.
- Wow.
- For thee.
- Whoa! Thanks, Da.
For thou.
Oh, wow. Look!
By the way, somebody
has to fix the gate.
- Give me that.
- Hey, a space hopper!
[Talking indistinctly]
Ma, look at this.
[Clanking]
- Hey, Noelie, watch this.
- [Giggling]
- Can I have this one?
- Frankie, thou lookest
perplexed.
[Indistinct conversation]
Place upon thy cranium this hat
and go forth, not fifth.
Da, the play
in New York, right?
[Children talking
indistinctly]
Ma!
Ma!
You wouldn't, by any chance,
be going away, would you?
Maggie!
Very smart, Frankie.
Cathleen!
Cathleen!
Noelie, stop the noise
right now.
You'll break a wand.
C-Cathleen...
Look...
I'm...
I was going to tell you.
Hmm.
I really was.
- Get off!
- I'm sorry. I just...
You're leaving.
Yes.
- Noelie, go away!
- Ohh!
It won't be for long
this time. I promise.
I want to ask you
something.
What?
Is Dad going away,
Frankie?
Go on, try.
Come on, Noelie.
See if you can get me.
Yeah. For a while.
Ahh.
- [Laughter]
- Stop! Let go!
[Whispering indistinctly]
[Children talking
indistinctly]
Hmm.
- Whoo-hoo!
- You knocked him over.
[Laughter]
You knocked him over.
Go on!
[Laughter]
[American cowboy accent]
"'Hands up,
"'and don't even move
a little gray whisker,
"or I'll pepper
your guts.'
"But Patrick Weaselbrain,
"the meanest thieving
cowpoke of them all,
"was not coming quietly.
"Fiery death spat
from his six-gun.
The wedding party
gasped..."
When I was a kid, I used to
wish for an ordinary family.
Sometimes I still do.
The only normal one is Noelie,
who has permanent brain damage
from an illness
when he was a baby.
His body will grow up
but not his mind.
He's the only one
who doesn't drive me nuts.
"...Some of them still
moaning in agony."
My Da is an actor,
always going abroad
for some play somewhere,
always looking
for his big break into films.
The rest of them share varying
degrees of incurable insanity.
It's amazing
I turned out okay.
"...once again, Sheriff
Bart Wyatt had got his man.
The end."
Yay, Ray!
Oh!
Silence.
As foreman
of this year's jury,
I have great pleasure
in presenting you
with the Golden Dog
for Literature.
Par excellence.
Outstanding.
Congratulations.
Bleeding stupid.
It is not stupid.
The boy's a genius.
That's all there is to it.
- And that's my mother, Ma.
- Parnell! [Whistles]
[Guitar strumming]
[Lively music plays]
Noelie!
Noelie!
Hey, get off!
Get off! Get off!
Come on.
Get off, get off.
Noelie!
Get off!
Get off the green.
Go on.
Go on, go on.
Sorry.
Ah, sorry.
[Smack]
Oh.
Frankie!
It's Noelie's turn!
Give me the ball!
It's Noelie's turn!
Stop!
[Vehicle approaching]
[Engine revving]
Nice space hopper.
Thanks.
[Laughs]
Hey, when did he
get so cute?
Come on.
[Knock on door]
[Knock on door]
Come in.
[Hinges creak]
I know this is, uh...
an important summer
for you, Frankie,
and, uh...
I'm sorry
that I'm going to miss it.
I don't even know if I'm gonna
be back for your birthday.
So... so just in case
I, uh...
Happy birthday, my boy.
Thanks.
You're welcome.
Now... you're going
to University,
and you're gonna need
spending money,
so here's what I suggest...
you get yourself
a summer job.
Da...
about University...
I don't think my exams
went all that well.
Ah, Frankie,
you'll be fine.
You'll be terrific.
I know it.
I've been thinking...
m-maybe I should go away,
see the world or something.
Oh, no, Frankie.
Let the world wait for you.
Why do you always get
to go away?
Well...
This is something that's
very important to me, Frankie.
There's even... there's
even talk about a film.
What I'm trying
to tell you
is that I probably won't
even get into college.
Ah, you know, Frankie,
I remember when I was your age.
I felt... I felt exactly
the same as you.
So how did you do?
Oh, I did... I did...
I did great.
Great.
Well... in English.
Da, please.
I'm serious.
I know you are, son.
Look, um...
Do you have anything special
lined up for the summer?
Do you have, um...
you have a girlfriend maybe?
Look, Frankie...
These few precepts
in thy memory keep.
"This above all:
To thine own self be true.
"But it follows,
as the day the night,
thou canst not then be...
Be false to any man."
Yes.
Frankie, there's special
instructions
for feeding that fish.
You can't overfeed him or...
or he'll burst.
[Hinges creak]
[Door closes]
[Birds chirping]
You'll be wonderful,
and so will she.
Oh, it's not like that
at all.
I'd give anything
if it was you.
Hmm. Lots of pretty young ones
fluttering 'round you.
Nah...
No.
I'll miss ya.
[Inhales sharply]
Take care of yourself,
Cathleen.
Do you hear me?
[Kissing]
And he exits,
pursued by a bear.
Ah, well.
[Engine turns over]
Goodbye, Da.
It wasn't like Da was
a whole lot of use for anything
when he was at home,
but it always seemed empty
when he was gone...
sort of shook the place.
With a wave of his hat,
he'd signal that I was
once again man of the house.
What that really meant
was absolutely nothing.
The important thing was
to try to make something
out of the summer
before my exam results
turned up.
Six weeks and counting.
Whoa! Hey!
Whoa! Hey!
[Laughs]
Aaahhh!
Noelie: Hey! Play football!
[Laughs]
- Hey!
- Whoo!
Play football, everybody!
[Sea gulls crying]
Go fetch, Bobby.
[Barks]
- [Girls giggling,
Bobby barking]
- [Harmonica playing]
[Barking, snarling]
[Laughs]
Gallo, you big idiot,
what do you think you're like?
Hey, what would you get
if you crossed Bobby Gallo
with a whale?
What?
Elvis Presley.
You...
you little shite.
Take it back!
I'm sorry, but Elvis
is a has-been.
Take it back!
Bowie is way better.
Don't take The King's
name in vain.
- Get off me!
- Who's the greatest?
- [Laughing] All right!
- Say it, say it,
say it, say it!
Elvis is the greatest.
Truest words
you've ever spoken, pal.
[Girls laughing]
He's the greatest man alive.
You should learn some respect.
- Yeah, and you've got
a serious problem.
- [Girls laughing]
You should get it seen to.
Hey, you know something?
What?
[Girls laughing]
This would be a great place
for a party.
Until the tide comes in.
What about the big beach?
Be a great way
to pull women.
Monster beach party,
acres of chicks,
no dogs allowed.
- [Laughter]
- Get your hole
or your money back.
Hey, we could show movies
up against the cliffs.
It could be amazing.
Go-Go dancers,
hash cookies.
[Laughter]
Which one is he actually
going out with?
Jayne... I think.
Romy's a dyke.
Everyone knows that.
No, she's not.
Yeah, she is.
She's not.
You reckon Bobby watches
while the two of them
get down to business?
Well,
they are Protestants.
So what?
So they do it like dogs.
You know...
from behind.
[Sea gulls crying]
# I wear my heart
on my sleeve #
# I'm not afraid #
- # Say what I mean #
- Jesus.
# Mean what I say #
# Set myself up #
# Let myself down #
# I may be a fool #
# To spread it around #
# But I #
# Just want to let you know #
# Sometimes I #
# Find it so hard not to show #
# So I sigh #
# And I let my feelings go #
- # Ooh-ooh #
- Come on, Frankie.
# I wear my heart
on my sleeve #
# Don't count the cost #
- # If I can't live enough #
- Are you guys coming?
# Then surely I've lost #
- # Though you
tend to get burned #
- Kick the football?
- # You tend to get bruised #
- Right then.
- Come on.
- [Laughs]
[Birds chirping]
Shoo! Shoo!
[Barking]
Frankie,
you got a letter!
Ma!
Noelie open.
Let me open.
It's from Da.
[Sighs]
"Dear Frankie,
"I'm writing to you
from New York City.
"It's 2:00 in the morning,
"and I'm missing you...
missing you all very much.
"I've been thinking about
how this is an exciting
time in your life.
"You stand at one of
life's great doorways,
"a time full of hope
and possibility.
"I've never been one
for giving advice."
[Laughs softly]
Right.
"But if I've
learned anything,
"it's that sometimes
the closest to us
"are the ones who seem
to be holding us back.
"Try to remember it is
out of love, not malice.
Your loving father."
What's he on about?
Cathleen: You!
You! Yes, you...
you with the head on you.
Get over here!
How dare you order my child down
from her own family wall.
Mrs. Griffin,
I have no desire
to be confrontational
about this.
This is our wall, and my
children have every right
to walk on it
whenever they wish.
All I'm saying is
that my wife and family
deserve a little privacy.
This little girl
is walking the wall
making gestures
at my children.
Now, surely,
you can see that this...
Let me tell you
something...
these are Griffin children...
pure Irish blood descended
from the high kings of Ireland.
They can walk
their Celtic wall
any time they want,
day or night.
We're a free people now,
no thanks to the likes of you.
Why don't you hump off
back to Britain?
You seem to be
under a misconception
as to my nationality.
You're a Proddy,
aren't you?
I am Protestant.
I am not British.
Well, let me tell you
something...
my country has been a republic
for nearly 30 years,
and I'm not about to let our
sovereignty be undermined
by a bunch of blow-ins.
Madam, I was born
and raised in Ireland.
I am Irish through
and through.
- Yeah.
- I am not British,
and I did not order
this little girl down
from her precious wall.
I merely requested,
politely,
- that she refrain from
spying on my family.
- [Gasps]
Spying?
Spying, is it?!
Well, all I meant...
Oh! Oh, yes!
The Brits accusing the Irish
of spying!
Well, this is one family
you'll never conquer,
you Proddy bloodsucker.
Ohh.
Go on! Run!
Run away!
Run away! Ha ha!
You should be honored to have
Griffins walking this wall.
Children, up on the wall.
Ah, Ma.
That's an order.
[Dog barking]
This is our wall,
and we're going to walk it.
Up the Republic!
Up the Republic!
Ray: Ma!
Guess what!
A general election!
What?
There's gonna be
an election.
Thank you.
Ohh!
Whoo!
Help me down.
Man on TV: Deputy,
would you care to comment
on the announcement
of the election?
Shh! Shh! Shh! Shh!
Well, this election gives
the Irish people
a chance to pass judgment
on the last four years
of half-baked misgovernment.
Ah, you tell 'em, Jim.
Fianna Fail is ready to get
this country moving again.
Moving back to the emigration
boats, some might say.
That's
a scurrilous remark,
only worthy
of the outgoing government.
We're going to win
this election.
My presence tonight
is vital.
The whole party hierarchy
will be at this meeting.
It could well go on
all night,
so I need to know
that you'll behave yourself.
I will, Ma.
And if Maggie gets up
to any high jinks,
you'll tell me exactly
what happened and with whom.
Do you give me
your solemn word?
I do.
You must tell me if there
are any shenanigans whatsoever.
[As Jimmy Carter] I, Jimmy
Carter, do solemnly swear,
to uphold the Constitution
of this house.
I swear.
If they get up to any nonsense,
I'll tell you everything.
You'd better.
By the way,
when you get back,
can me and Peter go camping?
We'll see about that
when you make your report.
[Hinges creak]
You want us to snitch
on them?
It's not snitching.
Now, do you promise?
Promise.
Promise.
You're the only ones
I can trust.
No one's to set foot in this
house tonight except family.
[Introduction to Thin Lizzy's
"The Cowboy Song" plays]
[Introduction to Thin Lizzy's
"The Cowboy Song" plays]
[Cheers and applause]
Ta-da!
[Rhythmic clapping]
Hey, you're clapping
your hands for me.
[Indistinct conversations]
[Clapping continues]
# Now, roll,
roll, roll, roll, roll #
# Roll, roll, roll,
roll, roll, roll, roll #
- # Just roll me over #
- Hey, Frankie, you got
any food in the house?
- # And I'll turn around #
- No, not unless
you brought some.
Thanks, man.
# And I'll move my fingers #
Uh, you need a...
[Sniffs]
# Up and down #
- # Up and down #
- Hey, Griffin,
this party's crap.
It's useless.
You got no chicks at all.
- What'd she say?
- [Knocking]
Maggie!
[Laughter]
[Guitar solo]
Frankie, uh,
is Maggie about?
Why?
She's a great girl,
Maggie.
[Laughs]
Guys, did you call
the girls?
What girls?
Jayne and Romy.
Did you call any women?
- He did.
- He did.
Maggie, give me the phone.
[Music stops,
cheers and applause]
Aah!
[Laughter]
[Sighs]
[Laughter,
indistinct conversation]
[Telephone dialing]
[Ringing]
Man: Hello?
[Change slot clanking]
Is Jayne there?
Uh, Jayne doesn't live here.
Romy lives here.
It only seems like
Jayne lives here.
Sorry.
Uh, for future reference,
Jayne's the blonde,
and Romy's the one
who only comes home
when she's hungry.
I meant to say, uh, Romy.
C-Could I speak to Romy,
please?
Uh, not at the moment
you can't. She's out.
Might I have the pleasure of
knowing to whom I'm speaking?
Sorry.
[Receiver hangs up]
[Laughs]
[Coughing]
It all [Coughs] works?
Of course it works.
[Laughs]
You know
the beach-party idea?
We should just do it.
Yes, and do you know
what I'm gonna do?
I'm gonna write
to Elvis and invite him
over to do a concert.
[Sighs] Yeah.
Bring Elvis to Ireland?
Great idea.
[Coughing]
[Inhales deeply]
[Gagging]
I know.
Dear Mr. Presley,
I am your biggest fan
in Ireland.
But I'm not the only one.
Under every shamrock leaf,
you'll find an Elvis fan.
With greased-back hair
and a little green hat.
And because leprechauns
are so tiny,
you can fit five times as many
in the average concert hall.
I'm serious.
- We know.
- We know.
[Laughs]
[Birds chirping]
Turn it up!
[Intro to Thin Lizzy's
"The Boys Are Back In Town"
plays]
Maggie, I, um...
[Jewelry jingling]
Could I have a word
with you?
Oh, what do you want,
Davy?
Whoo!
Whoo-hoo!
[Laughs] Yeah!
I was just wondering
if, um...
you'd like to go out
with me, like?
I already have a boyfriend.
That's okay.
I don't mind sharing.
Davy, get lost.
Come on, you won't know
for sure till you try it.
Davy!
#... How you was,
where you could be found #
You know you don't mean it!
# Told them you were living
downtown #
- # Drivin' all
the old men crazy #
- [Laughter]
# The boys are back in town #
- # The boys are back in town #
- Whoo-hoo!
- Whoo-hoo!
- Yeah, watch out.
- # I said the boys are back
in to-o-o-o-wn #
- Whoo-hoo-hoo!
- # The boys are back in town #
- Aaaahhhhh!
# The boys are back in town #
- # The boys are back in town #
- Aaaaahhhhh!
# The boys are back in town #
- # The boys are back in town #
- Whoo!
- [Guitar solo]
- Whoo!
- [Laughter]
- Whoo!
- I'm right behind you!
- Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
Whoo!
Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
[All shouting]
Whoo-hoo!
[Mid-tempo music plays]
Davy: Maggie!
Oh, shit.
Maggie!
Oy!
Get down out of there!
I want to talk to Maggie.
I'm staying here until she says
she'll go out with me.
Come down
for Jesus' sake, Davy.
I'm not moving,
I told yous.
What the Christ.
Where's Maggie?
Maggie!
Maggie!
Well, well.
Maggie!
Oh, shit.
Uh-oh.
You pair.
Maggie!
Get down off there, you!
Maggie!
Get yourself down here
fast, boyo.
No one can stand in the way
of true love, Mrs. Griffin.
Right.
I hope you're proud
of yourself.
What do you mean?
All you had to do
was be nice to him.
Davy, jump.
Davy, come down out of that,
you gobshite.
I'll catch ya.
I'm warning you,
Davy Dudley.
You'll be sorry!
If I see your horse's arse
of a face 'round here again,
I'll have you cremated.
Are you sure
she's your ma?
If she was your sister,
I could really fancy her.
You can't take your eyes off
this place for one minute.
[Sea gulls crying]
What am I doin'?
Half of the summer gone
already,
and nothing to show for it.
No girls, no money...
- Will you keep it straight?
- I am.
...and no way out.
Aah! Mng!
[Laughs]
Mng! Mng!
Ahh!
- Mng! Mng! Mng!
- [Footsteps approaching]
Mng! Mng!
- Mng!
- [Laughs]
Mng!
Hi.
I'm collecting for
the Labour Party.
Any chance
of a contribution?
Yeah, sure.
The Labour Party...
bunch of commie wasters.
Have you no commitment
to political reform
or state control
of natural resources?
The redistribution
of wealth?
7% of the world
owns 84% of the capital.
That's right, comrade.
[Coins clinking]
Thanks.
Should I try
up at the house?
Um...
Uh, no,
I wouldn't bother.
Well, see you around.
See you.
[Exhales deeply]
Pbbhhtt!
Frankie, the girl
at the gate... who is she?
Uh, her name's Romy Thomas.
Ah! Romy Thomas.
Her and the other one
she runs around with...
all hair and legs.
At least
they aren't hairy legs.
Ha! Watch it, mister.
You know
what those two girls are?
Protestants.
You stay away from them.
There's an international
conspiracy
between communists
and Protestants,
and I'm not having you
in the middle of it.
- Hey, everybody!
- [Vehicle approaching]
Hark, I hear the mighty growl
of a Honda 50.
The campers return.
This should be interesting.
Children,
go and play upstairs.
Now! Immediately!
[Chair creaking]
Keep those heads down.
[Door closes]
Oops!
- [Piano playing
discordant notes]
- Hi! This is Peter.
Peter, this is my mother.
I think you know the others.
The camping was great.
Uh, hi.
Uh, I-I've heard a lot
about you.
[Piano music stops]
How dare you!
Nobody carries on like a tart
in this house
and gets away with it.
Next time I let you
out of my sight,
it'll be over my dead body.
But, Mummy...
Don't "But, Mummy" me, missy!
You've disgraced the family in
front of everyone on the road,
and you've mortified
your father over in America.
I can a-assure you,
M-Mrs. Griffin,
that I have only
the best of intentions
towards your daughter.
A-Absolutely
nothing happened.
Yeah, yeah.
And what exactly are
your intentions, mister?
Oh.
Do you intend to marry her?
Lt, uh... well, I...
not this very minute.
I...
I-l suppose w-we could I-live
together for a bit,
uh, you know,
see how we get on.
Yeah? Is it...
Get out of my house!
Get!
I wouldn't let my daughter
marry you
- if she was pregnant
with triplets!
- [Door slams]
[Crying]
That's the last time
I'm ever bringing anyone
back to this hole.
I never want to see
any of you again.
[Sobs]
[Sobs]
Not bad for a first visit.
I think she likes him.
Shut up.
[Crying]
[Thunder rumbling]
Looks like
you're sleeping.
Yeah.
[Thunder rumbles]
I don't like it.
[Inhales deeply]
It's only thunder.
Come on.
[Telephone ringing]
Jack?
Jack.
Everything's fine.
How was the opening?
Yeah?
Oh, Jack,
I'm sure they loved you.
It's your father.
Huh?
What? Who's coming?
No. Erin and Rainbow?
Well, of course
they're welcome to stay.
All right.
All right, love.
Yes, they're here.
Of course they're
behaving themselves.
Hi, Da.
How's the play going?
So who's Erin and Rainbow?
Two young ladies
of Irish descent.
Yeah?
Who might require an escort.
[Sighs]
Don't worry.
It's only a few days.
Okay, here's Ray.
Yeah. Bye.
Hello, Da?
Yeah, great.
Nothing much. I'm working on
a new novel, though.
[Gum pops]
I'm so excited to be here.
My father? He produced
all the famous Irish plays.
Sean O'Casey.
I mean, I've heard
so much about it here...
[Sighs] I feel like
it's my spiritual home.
Well, now, Miss, you wouldn't be
the first to feel that way,
if you don't mind me saying.
You're from Dublin...
obviously.
I am.
Born, bread, and buttered,
as a man said.
What part of the states
are you from yourself,
if you don't mind
me asking?
Milwaukee. Yeah,
we're just here visiting.
Milwaukee?
Sure, I know it well.
Milwaukee.
Massachusetts.
# And the lights #
# They went down
on Massachusetts #
'Course, Dublin's the finest
city in the world, bar none...
all the writers and
playwriters and novelists
that come out of it.
Am I right, Joxer?
Yeah, right.
Of course, I... I knew most
of them meself, you know.
Really?
Do you know who
Brendan Behan is?
Surely often
had him in the car,
sitting just where
you're sitting.
Vomited in on top of me.
[Chuckles]
- [Laughs]
- He was a gas ticket.
Poor old Brendan, huh?
A-A-As for that bowsy
James Joyce...
I used to dread
having him in the car.
Never had a red cent
on him.
Wouldn't give you
the steam off his piss,
if you'll excuse
my French.
James Joyce? The James Joyce
was in this car?
Uh, not exactly this car.
An earlier model
we used to have.
He used to sit in the back
there, scribbling away.
I-l says to him,
"What are you writing, Jimmy?"
"A book," says he.
"What class of a book?" says I.
"A big book," says he.
He could be very Jesuitical
with his responses, you know.
I do a bit of writing
meself, you know.
Would you like to read some?
No. Are you kidding?
I want to take a piss.
Jeez. Must've been a long,
old flight.
There you are, Jim.
You're looking good.
Ray: So, tell me, Rainbow,
- why did the glowworm
feel embarrassed?
- Why?
'Cause it spent 10 minutes
chatting up a cigarette butt.
- [Cathleen laughs]
- Big deal.
What's yellow
and highly dangerous?
Shark-infested custard.
Get it?
Yeah, I get it,
all right.
Wish you were in it.
[Clears throat]
[No audio]
Could someone
pass the ketchup?
Here... Frankie.
Thanks.
I think I feel
a novel coming on.
Ray.
- Okay. John Wayne.
- Oh, Ray.
- Mmm!
- Oh, God.
[As John Wayne]
You drink your milk
'cause it's good for you.
[Chuckles, claps]
Huh?
Well, that's amazing.
That's his party piece,
isn't it, Ray?
Frankie,
give us a turn there.
Frankie recites poetry.
Or what about
playing us a tune?
Uh, I'd rather not.
Don't "I'd rather not" me,
mister.
Do it for our guests.
- No.
- [Talking indistinctly]
He's a fine musician.
Please, Frankie?
No.
Come on, Frankie.
[Muffled] Come on.
Coward!
[Clucking]
Are you a man or a mouse?
Come on.
Go on, Frankie.
Go on.
Go on.
[Chair screeches]
[Strums]
[String plinks]
[Playing slow tune]
Frankie, what's it called?
"A Terrible Beauty Is Born."
Oh.
[Detunes]
[Parnell whines]
[Strumming upbeat music]
[Barks, whines]
[Parnell whining]
You know, Frankie's
a direct descendant
of the high kings of Tara.
His ancestry goes back to
Cormac Macart and Brian Baru.
He's got royal blood
in his veins, that fella.
You can see it,
all right.
[Sighs]
Absolutely.
Mmm. Of course,
all the great Irish patriots
were of noble blood...
Emmet, Wolfe Tone,
Parnell... all of them.
The thing is, Erin,
one feels different
when one is
of noble birth.
[Strumming continues]
[Music ends,
Parnell whining]
Erin:
"No one can ever compare
"with my first
and only Desdemona.
She won my love forever."
He's real handsome.
Mmm.
What do you think of him...
back then?
Oh, wow.
He was gorgeous.
[Scoffs]
Oh, my God,
that's you.
You were really beautiful.
Oh, I mean... I didn't know
you were an actress.
"Alas, lago, what shall I do
to win my lord again?
"Dear friend, go to him;
"for, by this light of heaven,
I know not how I lost him.
"Here I kneel...
"If... If e'er I...
lf... lf e'er I..."
[Sighs]
I've forgotten my lines.
"Lf..."
[Chuckles]
Gone.
He looks
a lot like Frankie here.
How old was he?
Um... just 20.
But he was mature.
At 20 he was quite a man.
[Chuckles]
Hey, so's Frankie.
No.
No.
[Thumping]
Frankie?
[Thumping stops]
[Chuckling]
I didn't mean to scare you.
That's okay.
You have visitors.
What's this?
Very impressive.
Erin: Oh.
I'll leave you guys to it.
Oh, by the way, I'm Erin.
- Hi.
- Hello.
Rainbow: I'm waiting...
...as usual.
[Chuckles]
Bye.
See ya.
Who's the yank?
Nobody.
You burying the bologna,
fella?
She's all right.
Oh, yeah. I forgot.
Jayne and Romy.
Or is it Romy and Jayne?
- Who knows?
- Oh, shut up.
"Monster beach party
for you and your friends.
Saturday night."
Which Saturday night?
The Saturday night
after we start giving them out.
"Bring your own booze."
Doesn't say which beach.
It could be any beach.
- [Chuckles]
- [Lighter clicks]
[Chuckles]
Oh, shit.
Hang on.
What did you say
the yank's name was?
Erin.
"Aaron" as in...
As in what?
"Aaron"?
"Aaron" as in
Elvis Aaron Presley?
No, you stupid moron.
"Erin" as in Ireland.
Exactly.
"Elvis Aaron Presley"...
[Lighter clicks]
Ireland is his middle name.
That's "Aaron."
- [Lighter clicks]
- Spelled completely different.
A-a-r-o-n.
So what?
It's an omen.
I knew it.
He's going to come.
[Chuckling]
- Elvis Aaron Presley.
- [Laughs]
Elvis "Ireland" Presley.
I tell you who else
is coming... your ma.
Oy, you! You're not
looking after that girl.
Aw, Ma.
Ah, what's wrong with her?
She's a lovely girl.
Not exactly royal blood,
but...
Anyway,
she's leaving tomorrow.
Ma, I'm busy.
Yeah. I don't care
how busy you are.
You've got a job to do
and you better do it.
Here. Take this
and take her out.
I've been telling him we should
do this, Mrs. Griffin.
You pair aren't invited.
I'm not having
the three of you
getting drunk and
ignoring the poor girl.
And take her
to the pictures.
And try not to look
so miserable.
[Introduction to Mink Deville's
"Spanish Stroll" plays]
By the way,
you haven't said which beach.
[Sea gulls crying]
[Chuckling]
Well, my friend saw it.
She said it was great.
- # Ooh-ooh ooh #
- Or we could see
"The Goodbye Girl."
- # Ooh-ooh-ooh #
- Yeah, if we have to.
# Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh ooh #
# Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh ooh #
# Hey, Mr. Jim #
# I can see
the shape you're in #
# Ooh, your finger
on your eyebrow #
- # And left hand on your hip #
- Let's sit downstairs.
- Full downstairs.
- We'll stand.
No, Frankie, here.
Sit down or get off, pal.
Romy: Hey, look who it is.
- # Think you're so slick #
- Hey, Frankie.
Glad to see
you've got a girlfriend.
We were starting to worry
about you.
- # Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh ooh #
- No, this is...
Go on. Introduce us.
- # Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh ooh #
- Um... Erin, Jayne.
- # Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh ooh #
- Jayne... Erin.
Romy, Erin.
Erin, Romy.
It's nice to meet you.
Where are you guys off to?
Frankie's taking me
to see a movie.
What are we going to see?
Uh...
Why don't you go and see
"Rocky"? It's great.
Oh, come on.
What about
"For Whom The Bell Tolls"
at the I.F. T?
You and your Hemingway.
I love Hemingway.
Let's go and see that.
Sure. Okay.
[Man talking indistinctly]
Hey, cool charm.
What is it?
Oh, that's my gold megaphone.
I'm gonna be head cheerleader
next year.
Is that when
you all dance around
before a football match?
Oh, yeah. I saw that
on "Wicker's World."
It looks great.
Yeah, it's a lot of fun.
How do you do it?
Why don't you give us
a demonstration?
What, here?
Why not? It looks like
they could do
with a bit of cheering up.
Don't be such a mope.
Come on, we'd love to see it.
Just make something up.
[Chuckles]
Frankie, Frankie,
he's our man!
If he can't do it,
no one can!
Frankie, Frankie,
he's the King!
He's the one
that makes me sing!
Go-o-o-o, Frankie!
Go-o-o-o, Frankie!
Go-o-o-o, Frankie!
Go! Go! Go!
That's brilliant.
[Cheering, whistling]
Frankie.
Frankie, it's me.
I've gotta talk to you.
I'm leaving tomorrow,
and we've gotta talk.
[Groans]
[Sighs]
Frankie,
it's important, okay?
[Grunts]
[Sighs]
Please listen to me.
Why are you being
like this?
[Dog barking in distance]
Frankie...
Frankie,
you're a really cool guy.
You're gentle, emotional,
and intuitive.
[Sighs]
You're a real poet warrior.
I don't want to freak you.
But...
You're making me feel like
I did something wrong.
Where I come from,
if you like someone,
you come out and say it.
And if
they don't like you back,
they don't treat you like
you're some kind of moron.
I know
I come on strong sometimes,
but I just have to know
how you feel about me.
So how about it, Frankie?
Erin...
You're a very nice person.
[Scoffs] Great.
[Sniffles]
All right.
It's just that...
I don't...
really...
[Sighs]
...fancy you.
Frankie...
[Sighs]
Was that really
that difficult?
[Exhales sharply]
I meant what I said.
So did you.
Erin.
[Hinges creak]
[Rustling]
[Sea gulls crying]
Go get Frankie.
No, don't wake him.
[Camera shutter clicks]
Okay, that's done.
[Parnell barks]
[Chuckles]
[Parnell barking]
How come by the time I catch
on, it's always too late?
Screwing up is the only thing
I'm getting better at.
Two weeks left
till my exam results.
[Sighs]
I'm doomed.
Come and vote today
for Jim Davern.
Come and vote today
for Jim Davern.
[Speaking indistinctly]
Frankie:
Ma, we're too young.
So, what do you want,
a medal?
This is a historic day...
your first vote
in a general election.
- You excited?
- [Laughs]
Frankie: You're crazy.
We can't vote.
Oh, yes, you can.
It's illegal, not to mention
completely insane.
Hmm?
Not a tie.
This is a chance to partake
in your nation's history.
I falsified documents
so you could do this.
I don't want to vote.
You listen to me.
Better men than you
have given their lives
- for the right
to choose their leaders.
- Yeah.
You're gonna come with me,
you're gonna vote for
Jim Davern, and you're
gonna like it.
I think it's a great idea.
[Chuckles]
Jayne and Romy.
[Horn honks]
One of us, huh?
Hi.
Thanks.
Hey. I hear you guys have been
talking about a beach party.
- No.
- Yeah.
[Laughs]
Well, if you do get it
together, we're on, okay?
Cool.
All right, all right,
we haven't got all day.
Right.
You were so obvious.
Yeah.
[Chuckles]
[Intro to Elvis Costello's
"Watching The Detectives"
plays]
Frankie Griffin, 4-4-9.
You know
what you have to do.
This is great, isn't it?
[Chuckles]
# Nice girls,
not one with a defect #
# Cellophane shrink-wrapped,
so correct #
# Red dogs
under illegal legs #
# She looks so good that
he gets down and begs #
Here are the results
of the fifth count
from the Dublin
home constituency.
Martin Tully, Fine Gael...
- [Hissing]
- 9, 543 votes.
Brian Doerr, Labour,
8, 500 votes.
- James Davern, Fianna Fail...
- [Indistinct conversations]
- 13, 840 votes.
- [All cheering]
It's announced!
Jim Davern!
It's announced!
[Cheering]
It's a landslide.
Oh, look.
Doesn't Monica look lovely,
Father?
That's our Jim.
That's our Jim.
Whooooooooooo-oo!
[Indistinct conversations]
Since when
were you a smoker?
10 or 15 years.
Give us a light.
Haven't got one.
You think you're cool,
don't you?
Cathleen: Oy, you two!
Get inside.
[Vehicle approaching]
I don't believe it.
I don't believe it.
Mrs. Griffin!
[Chuckles]
[Breathes sharply]
Jim's here.
Jim's here.
Everyone come out!
Come out now!
Who is it?
- Come out here!
- Look who it is!
[Indistinct talking]
I give you our man in
Parliament, Deputy Jim Davern!
[Cheering]
Thank you. Thanks.
Thank you. Thanks.
[Applause fades]
I just want to say
what an honor it is
to be invited to the house
of such a great lady.
Oh, yes.
And how pleased I am to see
the next generation of Griffins
being raised up to be
our future soldiers of destiny.
[Cheers and applause]
All right!
[Whistles]
Oh!
Makes you want to puke.
I already did.
This is a great honor, sir,
a great honor.
Oh, I-I'm sorry.
Jim, this is Nelson Fitzgerald,
an old friend of the family.
Ah, how are you?
It's a great honor.
[Chuckling]
Victory is ours!
Hear, hear!
Frankie, Ray,
drinks for everyone.
Come on. Drinks.
Jim, come
and meet everyone.
Thanks.
It's really Jim.
[Cheering]
[Indistinct talking]
Here we are.
Ah.
For you.
Irish mist...
'bout an inch.
Malibu... just a tiny bit
at bottom.
Uh-oh.
We've struck gold.
There's a couple of
full ones here.
Ugh!
Hooo!
Poteen.
[American cowboy accent]
Firewater. Moonshine. Hooch.
That stuff can drive a man
crazy as a cactus.
Exactly.
Ah.
I don't think it's quite
what Ma had in mind.
Da said it's for
rubbing on the greyhound.
Ray, my brother,
we don't have a greyhound.
[Cap pops]
It's time
for victory punch.
Don't forget the wine.
- That's why we're here.
- Please.
No, please, I can't.
Please, don't.
It's been too long, Jim.
Father, I...
It's what we came
tonight for.
- Go on.
- Look, we're not leaving
till you sing.
- Father, I can't.
- Go on.
"A Nation Once Again."
This one's for Jim.
- [Introduction to
"A Nation Once Again" plays]
- [Crowd cheers]
# When boyhood fire
was in my blood #
# I read of ancient freemen #
# For Greece and Rome
who bravely stood #
# 300 men and 3 men #
- # And then I prayed
I yet might see #
- [Chuckling]
# Our fetters rent in twain #
# And Ireland, long a province,
be a nation once again! #
- Victory punch.
Victory punch.
- # A nation once again #
- Excuse me, Deputy,
a drink for you?
- # A nation once again #
Would you like
some victory punch?
- # And Ireland,
long a province #
- To victory.
- # Be a nation once again #
- You'll never catch us
in coalition, huh?
- # And from that time,
through wildest woe #
- This is just the best,
you know?
# That hope has shone
a far light #
# Nor could love's brightest
summer glow outshine... #
- [Laughs]
- Hold on, hold on.
[People singing drunkenly]
When Elvis comes to Ireland,
it'll just make the place.
We'll never look back.
It's gonna be amazing.
Our fellas
went falling like flies.
Have you ever smelt death
in the afternoon?
[Drunken singing continues]
Colonel Tom Parker.
That's where
your problem's going to be.
I'm sure he doesn't
give a damn about Elvis.
You're absolutely right.
Do you know what he needs?
A real manager.
Will you have another?
I know. There have been various
allegations made about meself.
And I know the names
of all the allegators.
[Drunken singing continues]
We had only three rounds
and a wee petrol bomb
between us.
I'm telling you...
until you've had a gun
in your hand,
you're still a virgin.
[Chuckles]
You wouldn't be so smart, sonny,
if your mother wasn't here.
If my mother wasn't here,
you wouldn't be
on top of our fridge.
[Drunken singing continues]
# Da-da da-da-da
da-da-da da-da-da #
[Laughs]
# A nation once again #
# When my dear country
shall be made #
# A nation once again #
# A nation once again #
# A nation once again #
# A nation once again #
[High-pitched]
# Uh uh uh uh #
# A nation once again #
- Oh, my goodness.
- [Cheering]
- Oh, it's awful.
- Oh, my goodness.
What a shame
Monica can't be here.
Ah, well, she's not
a great one for parties.
There's only one thing
I want to know about you, sir.
Did you ever have a gun
in your hand?
No.
Why don't you
come with me, pal?
Excuse me, have you
ever had a gun in your hand?
You know, you could be
of great importance
to the government.
[Indistinct conversations]
You're a very beautiful woman,
Cathleen, do you know that?
Oh, now, Jim,
you've a silver tongue.
Oh, if you were my wife,
I wouldn't leave you
abandoned and lonely...
a woman with
your fiery passions.
Did I ever tell you
how much I loved you
on the stage?
You signed my program once.
Oh, Jim.
Yeah.
[Both moaning]
[People singing drunkenly]
Come with me.
I need you tonight,
of all nights.
God, you're magnificent!
Jim, you have
a lovely wife.
We have
an open marriage!
Lord God, there must be
somewhere cozier
where we could...
Jim, I don't think
you're doing yourself justice.
Well, you should
try it sometime.
Take a walk
on the wild side.
[Chuckles]
I know you want me.
Oh, Jim.
[Drunken singing continues]
Do you... do you mind...
What?
I'm feeling...
Ji...
Jim!
[Light applause]
# Oh, Danny boy #
# The pipes,
the pipes are calling #
# From Glen to Glen #
Poteen? Why?
How could you?!
Poisoning my guests!
Why, are you mad?!
I'm sorry.
Sorry?
This was the happiest night
of my life.
My night,
and you've ruined it.
I'll never be able to speak to
these people again.
It was my idea.
I could have guessed your hand
was at the back of this.
How could sons do this
to a mother?
How could you,
Frankie Griffin?!
Poor Jim.
"Poor Jim."
At least it stopped him from
getting his paws all over you.
How dare you?
[People laughing in distance]
What did you do that for?
[Indistinct conversations,
drunken singing]
Ma?
Yes, love?
I'm very concerned.
What are you
concerned about?
What's going to happen
to Noelie
when I'm not around
to look a-after him?
Oh.
Oh, sweetheart.
Don't worry.
Two days left.
What is it about time?
Whenever you want it to move
quick, it goes slow,
whenever you want it to go
slow, it gallops.
I'm gonna
get this party together.
At least I'll go out
with a bang.
[Waves crashing,
sea gulls crying]
It's just gonna be great.
Yeah,
but what if it rains?
Screw the rain.
We'll get wet.
Okay, you guys do the music
and the lights,
then all we gotta do is round up
all the women we've ever met.
- [Chuckles]
- [Chuckling] Yeah.
Where have you been?
An interview.
For what?
A job.
- Did you get it?
- I don't know.
We thought you were going
to be a concert promoter.
Get lost.
Well, now he's here.
Hey, what are you gonna do
about the party?
I don't know
about this party.
I mean, no one is going to come
to a party on a beach.
Where do you think this is,
California?
Could be.
Well, it's not.
Hey, the thing is, I really
want to organize this.
So, are you gonna
help me, or not?
Frankie, you couldn't organize
a piss-up in a brewery.
Oh, yeah?
That's pretty good
coming from you.
How's the Elvis gig
coming along?
Bringing Elvis to Ireland
is a better idea
than a stupid beach party.
Hey, guys, relax.
The only reason why
you want to have this party
is because you
have not got the bottle
to ask out Jayne Wayne
or Romy Thomas.
You can't even
make up your mind
which one you fancy!
- Bullshit.
- No, it's not bullshit!
We're all supposed to
hang around on a freezing beach
in case
one of them shows up.
Do you want one of us
to help you stick it in?
At least I like girls.
At least I don't
fancy your mother.
[Scoffs]
Are you saying
I fancy your mother?
Come here.
Your ma is a fruitcake...
like the rest of
your freaking family.
[Sea gulls crying]
[Exhales slowly]
Fuck you, Nelson.
Nice one.
Jesus Christ.
Hey, Frankie, come back.
He doesn't mean it.
[Air horn blows]
Tell him you're sorry.
I am not sorry!
He has been a mopey
pain in the prick all summer,
and you know he has.
Frankie, I ain't
coming to your party!
He's not gonna go into it,
is he?
Who gives a shit?
They must be burning
gorse or something.
You don't say.
I'm not going in there.
You don't want to be nuts.
- [Fire crackling]
- Frankie!
Frankie!
Frankie!
[Air brakes hiss]
[Indistinct conversation]
Well, ya big trout,
you're all right.
Deep breath.
Does anyone know
where this fellow lives?
I'll take him.
I won't even ask
what you were doing.
[Muffled] Okay.
[Chuckling] Come on.
You're an eejit,
do you know that?
Yeah. I know.
Thanks.
Thanks?
Is that all I get after saving
you from those big firemen?
[Sighs deeply]
"Are you doing anything
later, Jayne?"
Uh, yeah.
Did I not say that?
No.
That's what I thought
I said.
Really?
It's the smoke.
Yeah, I know.
[Birds chirping]
So,
can you play pool?
[Intro to Thin Lizzy's "Dancing
in the Moonlight" plays]
[Laughter]
# When I passed you
in the doorway #
- # Well, you took me
with a glance #
- [Laughing]
- # I should have took
that last bus home #
- Hey!
- # But I asked you
for a dance #
- Don't worry.
- # Now we go steady #
- She's always late.
- # To the pictures #
- Yeah.
# I always get chocolate stains
on my pants #
# And my father,
he's going crazy #
- # He says I'm living
in a trance #
- I'm sorry. I got held up.
- # But I'm dancing
in the moonlight #
- You been here long?
No, I just got here.
- # It's caught me
in its spotlight #
- Fine. Hi.
- Mind if I break?
- Go ahead.
# On this long,
hot summer night #
[Guitar solo]
Just thought I'd
give you a chance.
Sorry.
- It's okay.
- You first.
# It's caught me
in its spotlight #
- # It's all right,
dancing in the moonlight #
- [Balls clacking]
- # On this long,
hot summer night #
- Nice shot.
Please.
[Balls clacking]
# And I'm walking home #
Enough is enough.
Black in the corner pocket.
#... But I'm dancing
in the moonlight #
Looks like
you were snookered.
How about tomorrow?
Yeah. Let's.
Yeah. Let's.
[Door unlocks]
[Kissing]
[Sniffing, licking]
How did you do that?
You better come in.
What?
Have you done this
with Bobby?
Bobby doesn't matter.
Well, how come?
He's a friend.
Is that it?
[Clicks tongue]
Bobby doesn't really
like girls.
Not like this, anyway.
Y-Y-You're serious?
[Sighs]
It's at the front.
[Sighs]
[Exhales deeply]
- [Grunts]
- [Clears throat]
Oh, God.
Romy's gonna kill me.
Why?
[Door opens, closes]
What's that?
Quick! Under the bed!
You're kidding.
Yeah.
[Breathing deeply]
You really had me
there.
[Tinkling]
Come on.
[Bedsprings squeaking]
[Exhaling deeply]
[Thin Lizzy's
"Parisienne Walkways" plays]
[Exhales deeply]
[Breathing heavily]
[Bedsprings squeaking]
[Headboard banging]
[Squeaking and
banging intensify]
Shh!
Shh, Frankie!
You'll wake everyone.
[Breathing heavily]
[Moans pleasurably]
[Clattering]
[Panting]
[Gasps]
[Groans]
[Panting]
[Exhales deeply]
Are you okay?
[Breathing deeply]
Wow.
Don't.
Just lie here for a bit.
Wow.
[Exhales deeply]
So, what do you
want to do?
Kiss occasionally.
Have a cuddle.
I mean... from now on?
Relax.
Wouldn't it be great
to do this all the time?
You know, to have a place,
so... so every night, we could
do whatever we felt like.
No parents,
no one to take shit from.
Frankie...
I could get a job, and
I'm good around the house.
I could fix things.
Wasn't it fantastic?!
It was fabulous. Now come on
back here and shut up.
I just feel...
[Sighs]... amazing.
Uh-oh.
Don't you?
My head's gonna explode.
Am I in love with you?
Stop.
[Sighing] God.
So, how do you explain
any of this?
I mean... tell me.
Really, tell me.
Jayne...
Before you go down
on one knee,
the answer is,
"Gimme a break."
Jayne...
Go home.
What did I do?!
# Well, Billy rapped all night
about his suicide #
# How he'd kick it in the head
when he was 25 #
# Speed jive,
don't want to stay alive #
# When you're 25 #
# And Wendy's stealing clothes
from Marks and Sparks #
# And Freddie's got spots
from ripping off the stars #
# From his face,
funky little boat race #
# The television man
is crazy #
# Saying we're juvenile
delinquent wrecks #
# Oh, man, I need TV
when I got T-Rex #
# Oh, brother, you guessed
I'm a dude now #
# All the young dudes #
# Hey, dudes #
# Carry the news #
# Where are ya? #
# Boogaloo dudes #
You scared the life
out of me.
Frankie,
where have you been?
Why?
He's dead.
The King.
Elvis Presley.
[Sighs deeply]
[Exhales deeply]
I-I'm sorry.
Thanks.
What happened?
I don't know.
I don't know.
Frankie, I said some stuff
that I didn't mean.
Aw.
[Sighs]
Listen, um...
[Sniffs]
There's, uh...
something important
I've got to ask you.
It's the beach party.
It wouldn't be right.
Yeah, no beach party.
I mean, I know it means
a lot to you.
[Exhales deeply]
Forget it. It's over.
Thanks.
I knew you'd understand.
- [Exhales deeply]
- You know...
I just had to
tell my friends.
You especially.
I'd better go home.
I'll see ya tomorrow.
You know something?
Nothing's ever
gonna be the same.
[Door opens]
[Door closes,
floorboards creak]
[Footsteps approaching]
You.
Where have you been?
With a friend.
Who, exactly?
Jayne Wayne.
Uh-huh.
I might have known.
Not now, Ma.
What do you mean,
"Not now"?
When I think of
all the noble Irishmen
who gave
their lives for Ireland,
and my son takes up with
a devious little Proddy bitch!
She's not... a bitch.
Bitch.
Bitch! Bitch!
Ma...
You are raving.
Oh, am I?! Well, let me
tell you something, mister!
You are not running around
with a Protestant
as long as you're
living under my roof!
I forbid it!
Oh, no! Oh, I see.
I see what it is.
You're possessed.
She's taken possession of you.
How dare you walk away
from me?!
Look at you,
you filthy thing!
Did you use contraceptives
to violate the holy tabernacle
of a woman's body?!
Did you commit sex
with a Protestant?
Are you finished?
[Door opens, closes]
Go and stay with your Proddy
slut, if she'll have you!
You're no son of mine!
[Brakes squealing]
[Smooches]
Thanks.
[Keys jingling]
[Footsteps approaching]
[Door opens]
Frankie, I want you
to come downstairs.
I'm sorry about last night.
Come on, will ya?
[Door opens]
Ah, Frankie.
Your mother asked me
to have a chat with you.
How are ya?
Don't mind this thing.
I'm off-duty.
[Both laugh]
I believe you're a big fan
of the Thin Lizzy's?
Huh?
Please, Frankie.
Just have a quick word with
Father Michael. For me?
Please sit down.
Your mother was telling me
you're feeling a bit off lately.
Can you tell me
about it?
I bet you can if you try.
Mrs. G?
If you wouldn't mind?
[Cups clinking]
Go on, Frankie.
Girls. Is that what
it's all about?
I don't know.
Some very strange things
seem to happen at night.
W-Would these things
tend to happen when you're...
having thoughts?
W-When, you know...
Sometimes...
I think...
I'm completely possessed.
I-l just...
I-l just... can't...
stop myself.
Thinking of devious little
Protestant bitches...
with erect nipples,
begging me to violate
the holy tabernacle
of their bodies...
And I can't see any reason
not to.
And then
the bed starts to shake
and whirl around the room,
and I get dizzy,
and I start going,
"Uhh! Uhh! Uhh!"
And the dirty Protestant bitch,
s-she's stroking me,
licking me,
grabbing me by...
Stop right there,
mister!
Is this meant
to be funny, Frankie?!
You will apologize
this instant.
I'm not apologizing
to anyone.
Father, this is
not my son talking.
The Protestants
have bewitched him.
Hey, you know something?
You're right.
But the funny thing is,
I'm okay,
all of my friends are okay,
even Jayne Wayne's okay.
There's nothing wrong
with the Labour Party,
or the British,
or contraceptives,
o-or even Protestants!
They're no better or worse
than anyone else.
You don't like it?
I'm sorry for you.
Cathleen: Have you forgotten
about the famine?!
- Frankie...
- How the Brits starved
millions of our innocent people
just so they could make cakes
for that fat bitch of a queen
across the water?
What about 1916?
They shot down thousands of
innocent Irish revolutionaries!
Think of Parnell
and Wolfe Tone
and poor, old Robert Emmet.
And now, you...
you've become a Proddy lover!
Frankie...
Most of the
Irish revolutionaries
were Protestant...
Emmet, Parnell,
Wolfe Tone... all Protestant.
Half of
the so-called heroes
who you think of as
having noble blood
were Protestant.
I suppose Pearse was a Prod,
and De Valera.
No,
De Valera was American.
That's how he missed
getting shot in 1916.
But do you want to know
what this is really about?
The fact is, I'm gonna go out
with whoever I want to,
and you're not
gonna stop me.
Protestant,
Catholic, Baptist,
Methodist, Lutheran,
Calvinist,
or Seventh-Day Adventist!
And you know what?
I hope I get bewitched
by 'em all.
Frankie... I think your
exam results have just arrived.
Well, open it.
They're early.
Man: Your time is up...
now...
[Thud]
Come on, get up.
Come on.
Frankie?
You all right?
Oh, he's okay.
Frankie, you passed.
You got three honors...
English, French, and History.
Well done.
Congratulations,
you dope.
It's probably a mistake,
you know.
Don't be so rotten.
Just kidding.
Looks like he passed exams.
He did really well.
[Laughs]
I knew you could do it.
You're a genius and a high King!
Thanks.
[Paper rustling]
Ma,
I meant what I said.
- Huh?
- I'm not gonna put up
with that stuff anymore.
I know, I know. There are
plenty of good Protestants.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's a shame
they're all dead.
[Chuckling]
What happened
to the priest?
Had to run.
Urgent exorcism or something.
Actors.
Sure, I've had 'em all
in this car.
Laurence Olivier himself,
no less,
having a right barney
with Vivien Leigh,
right where you're sitting.
Robert Redford, Paul Newman
in the same week.
Of course, I do a bit
of acting meself.
You know?
[Shouting indistinctly]
Parnell.
Hey, hey!
There he is!
Ma!
[Vehicle approaching]
Go on.
Come on, Da!
Straight through.
Do it!
Frankie: Do it, Da!
[All cheering]
[Cheers and applause]
Yay!
[Emergency brake engages,
engine turns off]
It's only a gate.
Kids...
[Grunts]
[Smooches]
[Smooches]
How are you?
I missed you.
[American cowboy accent]
Welcome home, sheriff.
[American cowboy accent]
Thank you, pardner.
Hey, Noelie.
Congratulations.
Thanks, Da.
I knew you'd do it.
[Birds chirping]
We missed you.
And I missed you.
Hmm.
So, are you excited
about going to college?
Well...
[Sea gulls crying]
I still want to see
the world, you know?
It's all there for you,
Frankie.
I'm not sure
where to start.
Everything's
turned on its head.
Yeah, I know
what you mean.
Poor ol' Elvis, eh?
End of an era.
Tsk.
I had this party planned,
but... we had to cancel it.
Nelson's in mourning.
Hmm.
Well, maybe...
You mightn't have a party,
but you could have...
you could have a wake.
- [Laughs]
- Hey.
That's not a bad idea.
Nelson: To Elvis Aaron Presley,
the greatest singer
that ever lived.
Born January 8, 1935,
in Tupelo, Mississippi.
Died August 16, 1977,
in Graceland,
Memphis, Tennessee.
The King is dead.
- [Squeaking]
- Long live The King.
All: Long live The King.
[Cheers and applause]
# Well, it's one for the money,
two for the show #
# Three to get ready,
now go, cat, go #
# But don't you
step on my blue suede shoes #
# Well, you can do
anything, but lay off
of my blue suede shoes #
Rock it.
[Guitar solo]
Yeah!
# Well, it's blue, blue,
blue suede shoes #
# Blue, blue,
blue suede shoes #
# Yeah, blue, blue,
blue suede shoes, baby #
# Blue, blue,
blue suede shoes #
# Well, you can do
anything, but lay off
of my blue suede shoes #
[Cheers and applause]
[Whistling]
[Cheering fades]
[Waves crashing]
- Hi.
- Hi.
[Inhales sharply]
So...
What are you gonna do
with the rest of your life?
Haven't decided.
Go to college, travel...
both.
How about you?
I'm going to Paris
for six months.
Work part-time,
study part-time.
Live out
all those fantasies
of sitting in cafes
and reading books.
Sounds great.
Listen...
[Clicks tongue]
Do you want to dance?
No.
[Sighs]
Okay.
[Inhales sharply]
I'll see ya.
Take it easy.
Bye.
[Waves crashing]
Look... I just want to
tell you something.
Where I come from,
if you like someone...
you just... tell 'em.
You don't hide it, like
you're afraid or something.
You make absolutely sure
that person knows exactly
how you feel about them.
I like that.
And I like you...
a lot.
So,
you don't want to dance?
Do you want to...
go for a walk?
You sure about this?
Yeah. I'm sure.
Okay, then.
Let's walk.
Paris...
that's a great idea.
Why didn't I
think of that?
Hmm.
Sweetheart...
# I am just a cowboy #
# Lonesome on the trail #
# A starry night #
# A campfire light #
# The coyote call #
# And the howlin' winds wail #
# So I'll ride out #
# To the old sundown #
# I am just a cowboy #
# Lonesome on the trail #
# Lord, I'm just thinkin'
'bout a certain female #
# The nights
we spent together #
# Ridin' on the range #
# Lookin' back #
# It seems so strange #
# Roll me over
and turn me around #
# Let me keep spinnin'
till I hit the ground #
# Roll me over
and let me go #
# Ridin' in the rodeo #
# I was took in Texas #
# I did not know her name #
# Lord, all these southern
girls, they seem the same #
# Down below the border #
# In a town in Mexico #
# I got my job bustin' broncs
for the rodeo #
# Roll me over
and turn me around #
# Let me keep spinnin'
till I hit the ground #
# Roll me over
and let me go #
# Runnin' free
with the buffalo #
# Here I go #
[Guitar solo plays]
# Roll me over
and turn me around #
Recovered by (c) dCd / June 2018