1
[]
Narrator [reading]:
[upbeat music playing]
all: Go, chewy. Go, chewy.
This is most frightful.
I really don't think
we should be celebrating
Quite so vociferously.
And so prematurely.
Threepio, stop worrying.
We won.
Yeah, relax, goldiepants.
Vader's nowhere within
a million sectors of us.
[record scratches]
Okay, I saw that.
And I can take care
of those pests.
This'll be no biggie.
Yes, biggie.
[]
You'll never escape me now.
I don't think
they can hear you, sir.
[growls]
Unless you've got
a radio transmitter
Inside your head thing,
which would be really cool.
I mean, super cool.
You're just so c-cool.
[yells]
Any bright ideas, genius?
As a matter of fact,
your worship...
No, we're cooked.
I have an idea.
Pulling the stick this way
makes it go backward, right?
Look, if you think we can
back out of this--
So this makes it go forward.
All:
Are you crazy?
Is he crazy?
After them.
Now. Match their every move.
[all groaning]
[yelling]
[engine sputtering]
Vader:
Ah, we lost them.
And you dented my head thing.
Han:
Well, I gotta hand it to you, kid.
It was a risky move,
but it worked like a charm.
You know, han,
Jedi can do some
pretty amazing things.
And now, if you'll allow me,
I'll quietly take us
into hyperspace.
[pop music playing]
Han:
Wrong button.
Admiral piett:
Funkadelic starship at nine o'clock.
Prepare my fighter ship.
So, what was that
about the jedi again?
Nothing.
[]
Vader:
You've escaped me for the last time.
Pilot:
I don't think they can hear you, sir.
Everybody, stop saying that.
Reckless,
young skywalker's move was.
Not ready to be
a jedi yet, he is.
I'm talking
to myself again, I am.
Obi-wan:
Master yoda. Are you here?
Obi-wan kenobi.
You, can it be?
Obi-wan:
Yes. I bring wonderful news.
And some not so great news.
Did you see the part
where I came to luke
As just a voice,
and I was all like,
"use the force, luke,"
And that's how he blew up
the death star?
Did you see it?
Yes. Thrilling it was.
So saw it again, I did.
But need more training,
luke does.
Unearth the holocrons,
we must now.
Teach luke the way
of the jedi, they will.
And to think we almost
didn't have them at all.
Remember our last mission?
Yes, remember it well.
I do.
I'll remind you anyway
because it was so exciting.
The empire had just risen.
Anakin became darth vader,
which was bad,
But he didn't know
he had two children now,
Which was good.
So we had to hide luke and leia
before we went into hiding.
It is done.
The boy is on tatooine,
Far from any other
living creature.
Can I help you?
[shrieks]
[chuckles]
They were easily startled.
I'm glad luke is safe.
My wife and I have little leia.
And into exile on dagobah,
I have gone.
Then we have done all we can.
Until we meet again,
my friends, we--
Wait.
Aved the holocrons
From the jedi temple
you did, right?
Me? You said
were going to do it.
Didn't, no I.
You to do it I told.
Why hard so to understand me
find it you?
The holo-what-nows?
The holocrons.
The sacred crystals
that hold all of jedi history.
We'll need to get those
out of the temple
If we're ever to train luke.
Bad this is.
Meet at the rendezvous point
on kashyyk we must at once.
I'll get there as soon as I can.
Even sooner I think.
Agh. They're back,
And in greater numbers.
Obi-wan:
Hey, stop. Jedi emergency.
[dramatic music playing]
So?
Do you like my new theme song?
Marvellous.
Boo. Boo.
You'll pay for your treachery.
But on my planet,
booing is cheering.
See? Boo. Boo.
Emperor:
Enough.
Thanks to order 66,
the jedi are no more,
And I rule the galaxy.
Disobey me
and you will feel the wrath
Of my new apprentice...
Rise, lord vader.
Never underestimate
the power of the--
[grunting]
Hang on, getting used
to these new legs.
Take your time.
Almost got it.
Here I go.
Never underestimate
the power of the--
Whoa!
[all chuckling then choking]
Vader:
I can still hurt you from down here.
[]
Unanswered our call
for help has gone.
We'll just have to go
to the jedi temple
And steal the holocrons
ourselves.
But the emperor
thinks you're dead.
Going there would be foolhardy.
C-3po:
Foolhardy, eh?
Count me in.
Both: Huh?
Now, who here's got
the guts to go with me?
Threepio?
That's my name, beardo,
don't wear it out.
Beardo?
What's gotten into you?
If you recall,
I had the protocol droid's
mind wiped.
It didn't quite work out
the way we expected.
Look, I don't know you jokers,
but if there's a mission,
Then I say we should stop
dilly-dallying
And get on with it.
Ooh.
Like this new threepio I do.
Thank you, little green boy.
Hmph.
Have you sold for parts,
I could.
Rako:
Did somebody call for backup?
My padawans.
We escaped to the outer rim,
But we came
as soon as we got your call.
And we brought a friend.
I am ready to fight...
...For the you guys.
14-jek. Came you did.
And not at the last second
this time.
Yeah, that was getting old.
Looks like we've got
a strike team.
[horn honking]
Room for one more?
Master yoda,
you can count on me.
Look. It's, um...
Our old friend.
You remember me, don't you?
Yes.
Happy to see you I am, um...
I'm nogata, but you guys
all call me rusty.
Yoda, you were my teacher.
I was in the academy
with obi-wan.
You remember me, don't you?
Of course. Rusty.
And we're back together again,
aren't we, old chum?
Just like at
the battle of muktuk?
Ha-ha, yes, muktuk.
Now that was a battle.
There was no battle of muktuk.
I'm sorry. You're just not that
memorable.
Rusty:
Not memorable? I was your lab partner.
And your roommate.
Yoda, we've reached
the staging area.
And we are ready to kick
imperial bottom.
Kick it, I hope you do.
Monitor the mission we will
from the command ship.
My ship is bigger, you know.
When the jedi master
you become,
Choose the ship you can.
D who gets to ride in it.
Request permission to engage
cool new superpower?
Yoda [over radio]:
Permission granted.
Padawans:
Cool.
[]
What? Huh?
Okay, n vault is...
Thanks.
This way.
Uh-oh.
Being bad...
Is not...
Good!
I don't mind watching this now
Because I know how it all ends.
[munching]
Unforeseen this is.
Get the emperor out of there
somehow you must.
Rusty, can you draw fire from--
Oh, sure, now you remember me.
How many times
can I say I'm sorry?
It's all being handled, people.
You've got some real heroes
on the job.
That's right, we're on this.
What's our plan again?
This!
Hello, boys.
This is not the droid
you're looking for.
What are you doing?
Not being a fraidy-cat.
How about you?
The five-oh-first legion
is under attack
By an unknown droid
and unknown coward.
I repeat.
We're under attack.
The five-oh-first?
That's my guys.
[men screaming]
sorry.
[in deep voice]
sorry.
What is going on out there?
Now my popcorn will go stale.
I hate when that happens.
The coast is clear.
Entering the holocron vault now.
Wonderful. And great work
creating a distraction, senator.
We're proud of you.
Don't mention it.
Emperor:
Ha-ha. A droid?
[laughing]
The odds of you beating
my troops are 750,000 to one.
Never tell me the odds.
Huh? Ahh!
Vaash ti:
There are the holocrons.
A whole lot of holocrons.
Let's get packing.
This is gonna be
a walk in the park.
[screeching]
Hey.
Give me those back.
Oh, for the love of bricks.
Now, it's your lot in life
to suffer.
Vader:
Throw your weapons down at once.
Why don't you make me,
Oh, great masked weirdo?
You're pretty cocky
for a protocol droid.
A protocol droid? Me?
Hah, so I am.
Then what am I doing
with a blaster?
Oh, dear. Oh, dear.
Senator, save me.
Senator organa?
I don't know him.
He's not with me.
I have nothing to do
with stealing the holocrons.
The holocrons.
Well, at least we're safe now.
[palpatine grunts]
Guess again.
[both screaming]
Just a few more seconds
and we're in the clear.
[grunting]
[clattering]
Vader:
A sith clone
Is no match for the original.
Well, well, well.
If it isn't my old
padawan friends.
And rusty.
Rusty:
Finally someone remembers me.
Thank you.
[yelling]
Still glad you remembered me.
We're not afraid of you, anakin.
My name is darth vader.
[]
The padawans are in trouble.
We have to go down
and help them.
No. Trust them we must.
Babies they are not.
[both screaming]
[all yelling]
The force is with you,
young one,
But you are not a jedi yet.
Well, duh. I'm only 12.
[grunts]
Rusty!
[groaning]
Got it. Catch.
Now I can fight.
Vaash ti:
Wait, I have a better idea.
Follow me.
C-3po:
We can hide in here.
You're stepping on my face.
Well, you're pulling
on my tummy wires.
[darth vader laughing]
[grunts]
Vader:
Well, kids,
School's out...
Forever.
Obi-wan:
Let her go, anakin. Let her go.
Can it be?
Obi-wan kenobi.
How foolish of you
to come back.
I will not let you destroy
everything I have worked for.
Your anger and your lust
for power
Have already done that.
You thought I was
too distracted by anger
To achieve ultimate power.
Well, who's distracted now?
What the...?
You will learn your place,
young one.
Ha!
Jek:
Gotcha.
[all cheering]
The holocrons.
[bobby whimpering]
All available youths
to the jedi temple.
Now.
Yes, lord vader.
I'm getting out of this.
Me first.
[both grunting]
C-3po:
You pushed me.
Man:
Rebel, fire!
Vader:
Hurry. They can't have gotten far.
Bobby:
See you later, angry vader.
What?
C-3po:
Let me steer.
[bail organa speaks
indistinctly]
Uh-oh.
Now look what you've done,
you twit.
Bail organa:
Stop being so mean.
I will hunt you to
the end of the galaxy.
I don't think
they can hear you, sir.
I've never thought
of that before,
Thanks for pointing it out.
Now, after them.
Yoda:
Worried I am.
Too quiet it is. Ah!
[all yelling]
Obi-wan:
Busy enough for you now?
[]
Oh, no, I'm hit.
Jek!
Oh, no!
Vaash ti:
The holocrons!
[grunts]
[all singing indistinctly]
Hang on to those holocrons,
rusty.
Rusty:
They'll never forget me now.
Now I have them.
Bail organa:
I don't want to die.
Turn us around.
C-3po:
I'm trying.
Hm?
Oh, no. Look what they've
done to my ship.
Actually, I kind of like it.
[all cheering]
Yoda, the holocrons are safe.
All thanks to threepio
and senator organa.
Bail organa:
That was almost a terrible fiasco.
And I'm not proud
of how I acted.
You're going to have
my mind wiped again,
Aren't you?
Yeah.
There.
The holocrons are buried
Where vader
will never find them.
Better mark the spot
so I'll know where they are
When the time is right.
That should do it.
That was thrilling.
Yes. Forgot how good
I used to look I did.
Yes. And we learned
a valuable lesson that day.
Sometimes the best way
to help a young jedi
Is to stay out of the way.
Yes. Quick, rush to luke.
Tell him of the holocrons now.
Yes, master.
Ghost obi-wan away.
It's only a matter of time now.
Ugh. Can't you fly this thing
any better?
Hey, I'm not the one
who got us into this mess.
Your boyfriend did.
He's not my boyfriend,
you jerk.
[groaning]
Oh, man. I tried to be a hero
and I blew it.
There, there, master luke.
You'll always be a hero to me.
And r2.
I thought this jedi stuff
would be easy,
But it's really hard.
I wish ben was here.
[blows nose]
He'd know what to do.
[sighs]
Ghost obi-wan:
Luke. Trust your feelings.
Ben? Is that you?
Ghost obi-wan:
You need more training.
I have news
that will help you become
The greatest jedi of all time.
Ah! A ghost!
Luke, no. No, no.
Listen to me.
The jedi holo--
Don't touch me.
Get away.
[alarm blaring]
Nice going, kid.
That was
the hyperdrive control.
You can't get rid of me
that easily.
[grunting]
Tell me about it.
I don't know where we're gonna
come out of hyperspace.
Well, I do! We'll be heading
right into a planet.
I'm sorry, luke.
I was only trying to help.
I guess I just don't know
when to stop.
Well, next time,
scare somebody else.
Scare somebody else.
Know when to stop.
Both: That's it.
Han: We're coming out in three,
Two...
I hope this button
makes us stop.
[all yelling]
[brakes screech]
Are you trying to kill us?
Not us. Look.
Huh?
Vader:
Holy mos eisley. Reverse!
Hello, darth.
A g-g-ghost!
[vader yelling]
[grunts]
Jar jar:
Ani.
It's meesa. Jar jar.
My name is dar--
Jar jar:
These are my kids-a.
Jo jo, jay jay, and jee jee.
Meetsa your uncle ani.
[all clamouring]
This day is not
going in my diary.
Ha, ha, ha.
You did it, kid.
No. I got lucky.
That won't be enough
to defeat vader next time.
I'm gonna need
a whole lot of help.
Humble luke is now.
Guidance he will accept.
Ready for the holocrons he is.
How can you be sure?
Told me themselves they have.
Call to him, they will.
And hear their call he will.
Holocrons?
Yoda:
For strong in him, the force is.
But others strong
with the force there are.
The holocrons.
Yoda:
But the question there is.
Who will get to
the holocrons first?
Jawa:
Utinni.
Utinni!
[]