1
You're a fucking bitch.
Fuck, I hardly stopped it.
What was that?
Look what's going on.
Goddammit!
God saved us. Fuck.
- Look what's going on.
- Five cars.
I knew that, with this weather.
We shouldn't have rushed.
- Who rushed? Did we rush, Irina?
- Are they alive?
Turn off your music.
So what's there? Dead, goddamn.
Look there as well...
Fuck.
Fuck, I thought we were done.
The way I've driven,
God has protected me.
I hit the brakes, but it wouldn't stop.
It went on, you know.
What's flying there?
What's that?
It'll just crash now.
Go, go, go. Let's see. C'mon, go.
What was that, Volodija?
I don't know. An airplane?
What? Airplane?
C'mon, it was a comet.
The plane is burning, I guess.
Wow.
It's a red light.
Did we record?
On this? We must have.
I crossed on a red light.
I told you, right.
Hi.
Yes.
What?
Wait a sec. Look at this smoke.
No, it can't be from a comet.
It's not a comet, it's like a plane.
It looks like an airplane crashed
on the 67th.
What a smoke there. So bright.
We shot it on the dashcam,
I'll show you later.
I even crossed on a red light.
Wow, what a smoke.
We can't even figure out
what that was.
You can see it from the balcony.
No, you won't see it.
There is a nine-floor block there.
The tail is so bright.
Look, a guy's there.
Let's ask him if he saw it too.
What was that?
A comet or what, goddammit.
Look, at that smoke.
Looks like it's from a plane.
Fuck, it even blinded me.
The flame was so bright.
It fell somewhere there.
The contrail remained.
One second, Lena.
It probably landed in Ekaterinburg.
Wow.
Fuck! Goddammit!
Why are you sitting so calm?
Fuck me!
What the fuck!
Fucking shit!
Should we go out?
Fuck, sure.
I will park here then.
You are so calm. Motherfucker.
I saw that it wouldn't hit me.
Fuck...
For example,
an elephant has a trunk...
Along...
Yes, a trunk goes along.
And a rhino has it across.
Do you get it?
It's a rhino's bone.
I'm just describing.
And toes. And feet.
Do you pay attention to feet?
Not to mine.
- What about others' feet?
- Yes. Sometimes.
Above all,
they should have no cracks.
Then you need a fretsaw...
It's still smoldering...
You've run over and tumbled it.
You've done their job.
Puddles.
You're so good at it.
Shoot it, for fuck's sake.
Load more.
Look, he's laughing himself, fucker.
They are having fun, motherfuckers.
In Russia, we have
the foundation of society.
The backbone of society,
these hard-working men and women.
So, we tell him:
"C'mon, dude."
Zhenya, c'mon, reproduce.
You have 150 million bloody sperm cells
in each portion of your sperm.
150 millions sperm cells!
Zhenya, why do we
flush them down the toilet?
"Do it in the womb, in the womb.
Ejaculate into the womb."
And he says:
"I'm working so damn hard, guys."
"I have no money. How can I?"
What? He can't?
Well, he can't. Wait. Careful.
He brings her...
Wait. He shares a flat with a guy,
with his colleague, in Odintsovo.
35,000 for two rooms.
Got it? So, in Odintsovo...
I suppose, about 30 minutes.
Okay. Bye.
When these
bloody dash cams appeared...
there's so fucking many
funny things now on the internet,
Right.
All the shit is uploaded to the internet.
Car crashes, goddammit.
Fuck, the road police
is now afraid of these cams.
They see it
and just don't bother you.
They stay fucking away.
These cams fucking glow as well...
This one that I bought
is an improved one.
The fucking lens moves separately.
You don't have to move
the whole thing.
It turns to the left, to the cabin.
This is unnecessary.
Yeah, maybe.
These cams have been
popular abroad for a long time.
But they've just appeared here recently,
goddammit.
Stop, stop, stop!
Calm down, calm down.
Fuck, release the brake.
Are you fucking nuts? Why are you
braking so harshly? Drive to the side.
Don't brake harshly.
There is a fucking truck.
I don't brake harshly.
Shit. That car is gonna hit us.
Fucking shit. What's going on there?
It's fucked up.
Sunshine, relax.
Everything is okay with us.
Crashed in the bum. Again. And again.
Fuck. Shit.
Sunshine, calm down. Everything is okay.
We're fine. I've steered out.
What's this? What the fuck?
Fire.
The bus is on fire.
Fucking hell.
Why are they not getting out?
You can't see anything.
Not a bloody thing.
Do not hurry, Andrey.
I can't see anything.
Turn on the tail lights.
Everything is turned on.
So nobody will crash into us
from the back.
Shit. Why is there so much smoke?
Hell, who knows what's on fire there.
Maybe the brake pads are on fire.
Fucking smoke.
Motherfuck.
Look, horses are coming.
Are they going this way?
Where the fuck are you going?
Fuck.
Motherfucker.
Fuck a duck, bitch.
A fisherman.
Why is he here?
Oh boy!
Oh my God! Mum, are you ok? Are you calm?
My heart almost stopped.
It was a chick driving.
Damn her.
Damn girl.
Bastards.
Oh my God!
Phew, God, mother dear!
And who crashed whom? That guy?
You know...
It was so fast that I didn't notice.
Oh, my God!
There must be somebody...
Somebody at the front must be killed.
I don't know if anyone is alive
in the first car. In that one.
Right.
Oh my God!
Virgin Mary!
See, Tolik broke just in front of the car.
Fucking bitch! This teen was driving.
Oh. Look, they pulled an old man
out of her car.
A very old man... It's a nightmare.
Look, we stopped three meters from them.
Well done, Tolik.
Oh my God!
I didn't even notice, daughter.
- Me too.
- Good god!
Oh my God!
How did it all happen?
Oh merciful Lord!
What's wrong with all these cars?
See, they covered him.
They covered him with a cloth.
Is he dead?
- No, he is alive.
- Alive?
He is alive.
They laid something under him.
Snotty bitch!
Oh my God!
Mum, it's not clear
who crashed whom.
Well, we will stay here
until the police come...
Tolik, is everybody alive?
Everybody's alive... still.
There is a roundabout
in 400 meters.
Take the second ramp.
Holy shit.
Fuck.
What the fuck?
Fucking asshole.
Oh God. Is he alive?
I don't know.
Lady, what's up...
We have a wedding there...
How much?
Are you interested in something?
Sure, we are interested in sex.
Well, a blow job costs 1000 rubles,
20 minutes of sex costs 2000 rubles,
and one hour is 3000.
3000 for an hour?
Yes, but with one partner.
Holy shit! That's expensive.
Anal is forbidden, right?
- What?
- Is anal forbidden?
It is not forbidden,
but it alone costs 3000.
So, it'll cost 3000 to have fun for
an hour and 3000 more to ride an ass.
Nope. Well, if we have fun for one hour,
I'll make you a discount of 1500 for anal.
Ah, so it will be 3000 for pussy and
1500 for ass. Four, 5 per hour, right?
Yes.
Well... Will you? On the way back.
Well, I don't know. We'll see.
And a blow job? How much?
1000 rubles.
- How long will you be staying here?
- I don't know. Probably one or two hours.
Then we have time.
We'll go to Kaganyk now
and come back in one hour.
What is your name?
- Uliana.
- All right, Uliana, see you.
Fuck me!
Up the wazoo.
It's cheaper in Rostov.
Signal.
Shit! Are you crazy?
Fuck you! Go away!
Help me!
What should I do? Help me!
Go fuck yourself!
Go away, I said! Fuck!
Motherfucker!
Fuck, what to do? Shit!
Go fuck yourself, I told you! Fuck!
Leave me alone, please.
What do you want, for fuck's sake?
Help me, help me, please!
Help me! Call the police!
Oh, my Lord! Somebody help me!
Police!
What is so noisy?
Alright.
Are they going to wash it?
It won't fit, look.
Is it ours?
Whose else?
I'll ask them what the fuck.
What have we come to...
Wow...
Are they making a movie?
No. Really, they drove a tank here
to wash.
Super, I also need such stuff at home.
Are you going to pass him?
Look, it's forbidden.
He's going to play a trick on me.
He's going to play a trick on you?
What? Fuck off! Bugger off!
Wait. Wait.
What the fuck? Open the door! Blow me!
Calm down!
What the fuck?
Guys, I wanted...
What the fuck did you want?
I wanted to pass, and you too.
Open the door.
What for?
Open the fucking door!
Hands off!
I was going to pass...
Shut up!
I was going to pass...
Ok. Stay here.
Here everything is recorded...
Call the police.
Where is my phone?
Take this one.
You saw I had turned on the blinker...
I didn't.. No, I...
Serezha, don't argue. Don't argue.
No, wait.
Serezha, don't argue.
I was passing correctly, you saw...
I did it in advance...
The sign...
Wait, I was already passing...
The blinker doesn't give you the right
to drive ahead of me.
Fuck, what is the number? 211, right?
Did you crash him in the back?
My back hurts. Oh, fuck!
Uneven road in 200 meters.
Danger in 200 meters.
An accident in 200 meters.
Shit.
Fuck. It's over.
What a great ride.
Andrey, don't do it. Don't.
I'm scared.
Don't do it. Please.
What if he tries to pass us?
The truck will turn on the blinker.
If yes... what if the truck...
Oh God, no. Stop it.
Move into the lane, move.
Please, stop it.
Please. I'm scared.
That's enough, Andrey.
I beg you, stop it.
I'm scared, stop it.
I'm scared, stop it.
Stop it. Don't speed up. Brake.
Brake. It's moving slower than we are.
I'm scared.
Stop it.
Reduce your speed.
Man, it's not even stylish...
to wear a sombrero in the car.
Fuck!
We're lucky. We're fine. We're lucky.
- Stop, stop, stop.
- We're lucky.
- We're lucky.
- Fuck.
Stay in the car. Everything is okay.
Just some scratches.
Oh my God. What the hell is happening?
Are they alive?
Stas, Nad'ka told you yesterday
not to go to the toilet
till morning. And that's it. Stas.
No. Stas went twice.
No. You did not after she said that.
No. Why?
I went once again when you woke up.
Do you remember,
I woke you up by accident?
- I didn't sleep.
- You did.
You fucking snored.
I passed by and you turned to me.
And I said: "Sleep, Mom, sleep".
Fuck.
- Shit.
- Brake.
Don't go to the roadside.
They'll say it was you.
He drove away, fuck.
We recorded that.
Open the door.
It's opened.
Bitches, fuck.
Oh, God.
What?
Oh, the dashcam.
Did it record?
I'll kill you, asshole.
This awful week is over.
Shit. How...?
I hate you, bitch.
Let me try.
If you break it, Dima will break me.
You got to be the wise one?
Maybe the other way around.
It's recording already.
And what is it recording now?
- Everything, of course. What do you mean?
- Yeah?
I think it should be like that, right?
How did Dima do that I wonder?
I'll tell you.
These sticks hold it.
That's how it's supposed to be.
It's not right.
He took it off yesterday.
Maybe put it in there...
Not spinning, fuck. The roller, probably?
No.
Yes. And do something with it.
No.
Wait. Do it like that.
Dima didn't touch anything.
It was just hanging here.
Just right. How did he do that?
Well, I don't give a shit.
We'll drive without the dashcam.
I'll kill you, bitch.
122. Fuck.
Him again... Here he is.
Serezha, go away, please.
Go fuck yourself!
Hop off my balls, bitch!
C'mon, Serezha. Serezha! Serezha!
I'll beat the shit out of you, bitch!
Understand?
Serezha, drive away, please.
Why stay?
Got him.
Serezha, I'm scared.
He can shoot.
He won't.
Zakhar, bend down, please.
Serezha, you too.
Calm down...
Break the fucking window.
Break it, fuck.
Why the fuck are you standing,
motherfucker?
Pull out the fucking keys!
There is a huge dog.
Kill the engine.
Shoot the fucking dog and that's it.
Serezha, bend down. Zakhar, bend down.
Shoot the dog.
Drive away, Serezha, please.
The second police car...!
There is another one. Drive away, Serezha.
Ok, get out.
Why did you get out?
Should we block...
Guys, I have a kid in the car.
Could you please let me pass?
Shoot the dog and that's it.
Let us drive away. The kid.
Shoot the dog and that's it.
And now they can block him.
Thank goodness!
Look, fucking cows are running.
Be careful.
Oh fuck.
What the fuck. He saw cows.
Why was he riding so fast?
- He was flying.
- Why was he?
Let's go. I don't give a shit about him.
The cow is alive.
This guy also drove too fast.
They're from the 16th district. Shit.
Fuck, they feel freedom here, bastards.
They have too many speed limits
in their district.
But walking cows is fine?
Yes.
Oh, fuck, bacon, bread...
Oh, fuck me!
Well, Leha, you said that, fuck...
Holy fuck, you have it up the wazoo...
Let's cut it...
We cut it and shitfaced...
And finally we brought him home...
Completely shitfaced...
We drank a lot...
We brought him to Popova 14...
This fucking address...
To Raisa Viacheslavovna, fuck...
Fuck, we've arrived...
Holy shit balls!
- We are sailing.
- Fuck me.
Where are we sailing to?
Fuck, to the shore.
Straight ahead.
Don't twist the wheel!
Here he is.
Shit. Is he stoned?
Insane.
Is he going to fall on the road?
Right.
Oh, fuck, oh, motherfucker.
He's alive.
It's so scary.
I want to ask him,
was it your first attempt?
Oh, God.
Do you have a mobile phone?
- Yes.
- I broke my leg.
I broke my leg.
Oh it hurts.
How are you?
Call someone.
Whom?
I don't know.
Call Yashka, he'll call some service.
- So much smoke.
- Move to the center.
Where are we? Oh, fuck!
Oh, you've driven to the side.
Go this way. To the left, to the left.
Move on. The center is here, near me.
To the left.
Stop.
We are driving in the center now.
What a nightmare!
There is a car ahead.
Motherfucker! Oh, Lord!
Oh, dear! Oh, Lord!
Oh, fuck! It's so hot!
Go ahead! Go!
Follow him, faster.
Oh, Lord, what a nightmare.
We got away. Oh, such a hell.
Yeah, it was really scary.
My eyes hurt so badly.
You can show the dashcam video
to your wife later.
I shot a lot
with the mobile phone already.
Oh, Lord, there is a clear road.
He had only one headlight.
I have no idea how he drove.
Nothing was fucking visible.
There is another car following us.
I told you about this road turn.
Oh, finally! The fire squad.
It will spit out its 4 tons of water
and that's it.
Where is he going? Turn away.
He doesn't know yet.
Oh fucking hell, a bear.
Fucking great.
That's just what I needed.
Fuck. It shitted on the road.
Fuck you, bitch!
Fuck, it's the 75th radio.
There is somebody darting there.
Yeah, I see. Stop him.
Don't. Sit down.
It's disconnected, right?
Easy-easy-easy.
Stop the car!
Transmit.
Attention mobile patrols
and special patrols!
We are chasing the red car 839
along Staraya Zareka.
It's driving away at high speed
violating the traffic rules.
I'll kill the bastard.
Has the car stopped?
No. He is driving on Lenin Avenue.
To the Kremlin along Lenin Avenue.
Watch out, he is driving
in the oncoming traffic lane.
I'll kill you, bitch.
Careful, he can brake suddenly.
Don't be so close.
Don't turn off.
We are coming to the hill.
We are coming out to the Kremlin
from the one-way road.
Stop the car, I said.
Ok, we are going up now.
Tell them he'll go either
to the right or uphill.
He'll go to the right or uphill;
we don't know.
C'mon, c'mon, c'mon.
He is going uphill.
Guys, be careful. He is driving
in the oncoming traffic lane.
Guys, throw something at him.
He doesn't stop.
Do you have something to throw?
Tell them he is coming.
According to the director of
the National Energy Security Fund,
Konstantin Simonov,
it will be very difficult
to switch to payments in rubles
with Western partners.
Oh, there is a duck. We'll take it.
It's probably alive.
Daddy, please, don't...
What? It's almost dead.
Don't...
Well, it won't survive.
We need a bag.
Don't hit it.
I won't.
Daddy, will you show it to us?
Why did it fly so low?
Yes. Alright. Or the powder.
And more vitamins and minerals.
It's worth it.
And proper feeding.
More milk means more health.
That's it. I mean, it can be cured.
Look, they have guns.
So, good luck. Goodbye.
What are these niggers doing?
Hooligans! And Russians sit still.
Whom should we call?
Did they rob them
or just beat them up?
- She came to Ekaterinburg...
- And what?
And we should show her our city.
Three days is not too much.
I don't know.
We could just take a walk.
Look. What the fuck?
The guy has stolen sausages.
Fucking unbelievable.
All the sausages fell out. Shit.
What the fuck?
Should we help catch him?
Hello, good morning.
Good morning.
What the fuck are you doing?
Why are you blinking?
What the fuck are you doing?
Fuck you, asshole.
...classical psychology...
...gave up on her... and the unconscious
dominates in sublimation...
...His are not clear... He proclaimed it.
...we never speak about it.
There are a lot of cannibals.
Remember Kurmangaliev? He escaped
from prison, they never caught him...
Yes. And don't forget
the president of Uganda.
Of course. Either we speak, and it's what
democracy, liberalism is for,
or we start to tell crazy wild stories.
Everyone will discuss them. We need
more education in our country.
We're a very ignorant nation.
The things you're saying are awful.
Let's get back to cannibals.
Listen, Michael,
I need a psychologist who can explain
why there were 400 candidates...
And why one of them
fought hard to be eaten?
It was his decision.
He made a great effort.
Hello.
Hello, Nikolay.
I want to add that in 1932-33
whole cities were in that situation.
And Lenin said: "When people start to eat
their children by the Volga",
then we'll finally win in Russia."
Wait. It's absolutely different.
We're discussing healthy,
self-sufficient people who argue...
...have serious disputes...
It's done for pleasure and not because
people have turned into beasts.
That's why I'm looking for a psychologist.
Our phone number is 7373948.
I need a psychologist who can say
it's a common thing.
You just don't know.
But it is in our textbooks.
I've already managed to fight.
With a skibby. On the bridge.
I beat the shit out of him.
Fucking asshole.
He cut me off on the road.
I blinked to him.
He stopped and started to
get on my nerves.
He started to push me.
I hit him 3 times.
Guys came to stop us.
This asshole was not fighting,
just pushing.
Fuck him.
What the fuck?
Look, look.
There are cars behind.
Fuck. I hope it doesn't turn over.
Motherfucker.
Keep right, to the curb.
Turn on the blinker.
Brake.
Ok.
Brake, motherfucker!
Dumb ass.
Brake!
Congratulations...
I messed up.
...will work in the stores of Moscow,
Podmoskovje, Petersburg and Sochi...
British doctors have cured
an HIV positive patient.
The Independent says,
it's only a single case.
But the doctors are optimistic.
It's a combination
of anti-retro viral therapy
that inhibits the disease,
and the medicine,
killing the virus in inactive cells.
Now there are 50 people
under this treatment.
What the fuck was that?
Can you follow him please?
I left my bags there. It's a taxi.
I beg you. Fucking faggot.
All my money, documents are there.
Fuck.
It's okay.
Thanks a lot. You just can't imagine...
Don't cry. Don't worry.
I'm not worrying. Just...
Relax. What happened?
Where're you from? Where're you going?
Is it cold? Are you freezing?
No.
Your voice is trembling. Don't worry.
It's awful. I can't imagine
what would happen without your help...
- I'm Pasha.
- I'm Dasha.
Nice to meet you.
Well...
It's an amazing meeting.
We're at the gas station.
We'll start in a moment, we're the last.
Yes. I'm with Nikita...
Stupid bitch.
She's crazy.
No means fucking no. Okay.
Why don't you say "Roma, I need it.
For such a price, it will do no harm..."
Attention. There may be
a police patrol ahead.
I hate these kind of assholes.
When I try passing him,
he starts to bitch around.
Are you on the fifth gear?
Fucking bitch.
I told you.
Fuck. Why are there such assholes?
And now he'll slow down.
He wants you to start passing again.
Fucking bitch. Asshole.
Talking shit...
External power is off.
It's okay. It's okay.
Guys, can you help us to turn it?
We are fucking done.
Fucking awful!
Have you caught the curb?
Yeah, we have.
Alright guys, good luck.
Fucking good luck. Motherfucker.
Oh, fuck, Zhen'ka-Zhen'ka. Oh, boy!