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The Secret of My Succe$s (1987)
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New York City. He wants to see what's there. I can tell him what's there. I don't know how when you've never been. Think of it, 'ey The world's in the palm of my hand Run a comb through my hair Headin' out for some new foreign land And all this could seem like a dream out the door With everyday people face down on the floor I always said I could make it and be who I am There's a new look in sight What a change for the new modern man Well, Toto, I guess we're not in Kansas anymore. I just can't figure out why he'd want to go off to New York when we got everything here. Somethin' I have to do, Dad. Did you pack an iron like I told you to? Mom. You're gonna walk around wrinkled in New York if you don't take an iron. Elmer Whitfield's cousin Carlton went off to New York a normal boy. Came back with his head shaved and an earring stuck in his cheek. With all this it seems like I'm dyin' for more The streets are on fire Never seen it before It's like the sound of electric guitars Worlds collide and hearts will be broken Over and over it's the same every day How can I say what has never concerned me The secret of my success ls I'm livin' Twenty-five hours a day Mom, there's a whole world out there. I mean, big, exciting. I got a nice, small apartment lined up. I got a great job. I wanna make lots of money. I want to have a meaningful experience with an incredibly beautiful woman. I can't even take a woman like that to a small apartment. I gotta get a penthouse. A penthouse? With a Jacuzzi in it. Doin' this for you as much for me, Mom. All those years of college, they're gonna start payin' off. Ooh, ooh, yeah Worlds collide and hearts will be broken Over and over it's the same every day How can I say what has never concerned me The secret of my success is I'm livin' Twenty-five hours a day It's amazing to me What a fool will believe to get by With a change of your mind, I can live, I can fly Back! The harder they come the harder they fall I never say maybe and I go for it all Just like the sound of electric guitars All right, listen up. If there are any bugs in here or rats or anything that has more legs than I do, you just stay on your side of the room, okay? I'll stay on mine. I should warn you. I'm packing an iron. You weren't listening. Twenty-five hours a day The secret of my success is I'm livin' Twenty-five hours a day Darling, please pack it as fast as you can. Mr. Forbush? Not me! He's two doors down the hall on your right. Into the shredder as fast as possible. Mr. Forbush. Yep. Hi, I'm Brantley Foster from Kansas. You hired me. I start work here today. You're fired, kid. Sorry. We all saw it coming, but we looked for some kind of miracle. Miracle never happened. What did happen? Hostile takeover. Ninety percent of the people in this building are out on the street. You are one of those 90%. Tough break. Mr. Forbush, I was counting on this job. I mean, what do I do now? Punt! Okay, New York, if this is the way you want it, okay. I'm sorry, Mister... Foster. I'm sorry, Mr. Foster. We need someone with experience. But how can I get any experience until I get a job that gives me experience? If we gave you a job just to give you experience, you'd take that experience and get a better job. Then that experience would benefit someone else. Yeah. But I was trained in college to handle a job like this. So in a sense, I already have experience. What you've got is college experience, not the practical, hard-nosed business experience we're locking for. If you'd joined our training program out of high school, you'd be qualified for this job now. Then Why'd I go to college? Had fun, didn't you? What impresses me most is the amount of experience you picked up while still attending college. Well, ma'am, I knew all those years of college would be worthless without practical, hard-nosed business experience. "Assistant personnel manager, J. Hall Communications. "Junior purchasing agent, Midland Furniture. "Vice President in Charge of Production, Central Manufacturing." Outstanding. Outstanding. You're not gonna tell me I have too much experience, are ya? Certainly not, you're perfect for the job. Great! Except... No. No exceptions. I want this job. I need it. I can do it. Everywhere I've been today there's always been something wrong. Too young, too old, too short, too tall. Whatever the exception is, I can fix it. I can be older. I can be taller. I can be anything. Can you be a minority woman? Mom, I'm doin' great. Is it dirty there? Are the people rude? No, this town is terrific. The people are really nice. That's good, dear. What about your job? Job? Hey! I got a fantastic office, got a gorgeous secretary. The works. Brantley, we don't care if she's gorgeous. Is she any good? What? You heard me. Can she type? Ma, of course she can type. Some can't, you know. Now, is it safe there? You haven't been robbed or anything, have you? Ma, will you quit worryin'? There is no danger. But New York is... New York is just like Kansas intensified. Policia! Policia! What? What's that noise? ls something the matter? Oh, no, Mom, that's just the TV. It sounds so real. It's Miami Vice. Well, can you turn the sound down? It's too loud. Uh, Ma, it's broken. The knob came off in my hand. Goodness. Well, what about Uncle Howard? Did you call him? Uncle Howard! Uh,yeah, the phone number. Well, you still have the number, don't you, Brantley? Oh, yeah. I still got it right here. Are you all right? You seem distracted? Yeah. Well, they just totaled a Ferrari. But Uncle Howard? Did you call him? No, I haven't had a chance to call Uncle Howard yet. Will you try to see him? I'll probably bump into him at the country club. Get the TV fixed, dear. Yeah. Listen, I gotta go. Okay, Mom? Okay- Give Dad my love. I will, dear. I love you, Brantley. I love you too, Mom. Bye-bye. Bye! They got 'em. The light is in my eyes How can I see through What do I hold on to Well, at least let me buy you an airline ticket. Dad, I'm gonna do this on my own. But you did make it a round-trip ticket? Yeah. I'm not gonna need it. No, when I come back to Kansas, I'm comin' back in my own jet. It seems like the world is upside down Don't know where I'm goin' to But you know I'd turn it all around It's just something I've got to do Take this. It's Uncle Howard's phone number in New York. I got an uncle in New York? My cousin Ellen married his half-sister's nephew before she got bit by that dog and died. But he's still kin, and kin is kin. Hi. I'd like to see Mr. Prescott, please. Do you have an appointment? Well, you know, I tried to get one, but I couldn't, so I just thought I'd surprise him. Mr. Prescott doesn't like surprises. Everybody likes surprises. Not Mr. Prescott. You can leave your name. Uh, Brantley Foster. Of? S-T-E-R. Of, uh, Kansas. Of what company? What do you wanna see Mr. Prescott about? About being his nephew. Oh. Well, why don't you have a seat? I'll see if I can work you into Mr. Prescott's schedule. Thank you. Give Uncle Howard my card. Are you really Mr. Prescott's nephew? In a roundabout sort of way. You sons of bitches don't have a half a brain between you! I'm looking at a $300 million deficit here because you idiots didn't anticipate the needs of a changing market! Uncle Howard? Now, get out of here, all of you! And bring me back some new ideas that'll work! Or I'll have your heads mounted on my wall! Geez, he's gonna burst a blood vessel. Yeah, wishful thinking. I'll see if I can get you in now. Thank you. It can't be good for his heart to shout that way. He doesn't have a heart. What, Maureen, what? Brantley Foster is here to see you. I don't know any Brantley Foster. Your nephew from Kansas. Who? He says he's your nephew from Kansas. Kansas? I... But, Maureen... Mr. Prescott will see you now. Clever. So you're one of the Kansas Fosters, huh? Shirttail relative, to say the least. Listen, I know you probably told your secretary to get me out of here in five minutes. Two. Right. So, I'll get right to the point. I need a job, Uncle Howard. Around here, I'm Mr. Prescott. Do you have any idea what we do here? Yes, sir. Pemrose is a multinational conglomerate with 27 different divisions. Products ranging from dog food to guided missile systems. There are 30,000 people working in this building alone. Their accumulated salary is higher than the gross national product of half the nations on the Common Market. Last year we borrowed more money from banks than Mexico did. It's a great company, Uncle... Mr. Prescott. That's why I'm here. What can you do for us, Brantley? What experience have you had? Practically none. But I believe in myself. Doesn't that count for something? Deep inside, I know I can do anything if I just get a chance. Think back to when you were my age. Remember how you felt when you went after that first job. Remember how you wanted it so badly you couldn't sleep the night before the interview. Remember how crushed you were when the guy said, "What kind of experience have you got?" You wanted to shake your fists and say, "I can do anything if I can just get a chance." They're ready for you in the boardroom, Mr. Presoott. Call Bates in Personnel. Tell him I'm sending somebody up. Well, you're in the front door, kid. What you do on this side of it is up to you. Congratulations. He really must have taken a shine to you. Thanks. Warm guy. May I? You can't come in here, bozo. Take your crap to the mail slot. I work here. Just started. What do you want, an engraved invitation? Come on, come on. Brantley, huh? Yeah. Somebody gave you that name? Aw, Jesus, a college puke. This really makes my day. Well, you're welcome. Melrose, get over here! Listen to what he says, then do what he does. Right. Stay out of my way. Don't use the stamp machine for personal letters. Take off that stupid-looking tie. Looks like you shot your couch. You got any questions? Yeah. What do I call you? You call me God. Got a problem, boss? I'm your man. Show the college puke the ropes and keep him out of my face. His name is Brantley. All right, kid. Follow me. All right, Brantley, you stick with me and everything's gonna be copacetic. Twice a day you deliver. Like a mailman, you pick up whatever's goin' out. I can do it in 30 minutes. Rattigan thinks it takes me two hours. Okay. What's this department? What do they do here? Who knows, man? This place is a zoo. Nobody knows what anybody else is doin'. Can you get promoted out of the mail room? You can't even get paroled out of the mail room. Excuse me, dear. Good morning. Nix. What? Good morning. Look, not the suits. - What do you mean? - Excuse me, sir. Good morning. Look, not the suits, man. You never consort with the suits, unless they consort with you first. Wait a minute. That's ridiculous. He's a person. I'm a person. I can't say hello to him? He's not a person, he's a suit. You're mail room. No consorting. Come on. We're entering a sensitive zone. This guy in that office, he just got canned. Mail room knew about it on Friday. He just found out today. No kidding. ls his job still open? No,man, an economic cutback. His job was dissolved. About two dozen suits got the ax. Will you quit trying to consort? Come on. All right, the yellow ones go to Purchasing. All the white ones are a bunch of suits talkin' to themselves. You're supposed to deliver 'em, not read 'em. Some of this stuff doesn't make any sense. They send requisitions through two departments to get procurements for a third. What kind of thinking is that? That's suit thinking. Something happens to a man when he puts on a necktie. Cuts off all the oxygen to his brain. Hey. What, are you crazy? You're not supposed to take the memos out of the mail room. I can't follow a chain of command in this company, man. They got the right title, but their job assignments and objectives are screwed... Look at this. Jesus. Purchasing. What? It's a joke. They've got two people doin' basically the same job. Neither one of them is doin' it right. I'll bring it up at the next stockholders meeting. Would you put these things away, huh? Hey, hey, hey... Whoa, Melrose. Hey, how ya doin'? Listen, we've been gettin' a lot of requests down in the mail room for stockholder information, company assets, expenditures. Anything you can give us. You're kidding? Any of this research you want, you can have. Take it all. Thanks very much. Feelin' all right It's the same with me too The season that's taken a hold of us all And we're sayin' we do Just look at our lives We run through the day We stare at the night As you head for the noises For me, well, it's just like the Fourth of July Maybe it's change or the time of the year Or is it the way that you hold me so near Oh, I swear it's the price of love I swear it's the price of love Now I gaze at the lights Our hearts show the way For a moment I swear it was heaven right there I'm at war on this day She's the most incredible-looking woman I've ever seen in my life. Man, she's a Rolls-Royce, but she's also a suit. What's she like? What do you know about her? I know enough never to consort with the suits, pal. Even when they do have legs like hers. Come on. You know more than that. Her name is Christy Wills. She's supposed to be some sort of financial wizard. Harvard, all that crap. And forget it. I swear it's the price of love Price of love I swear it's the price of love No,no,no,no. That's Transportation's problem. No, we do not supply drivers for executives' wives. We are a messenger service. I don't care if the other drivers are all busy. Yeah, well, the same to you, sweetheart. Hey, Dartmouth, get over here. Executive's wife wants a ride up to Litchfield. Check out a car and drive her. Oh, where's Litchfield? You'll find it. Just follow the smell of money. Excuse me, ma'am. I'm not quite sure which way... Turn the key, start the car, put it in drive and step on the gas. Any idiot can do that, even my husband. Excuse me, ma'am. I know I'm not supposed to consort... Then don't. It's just that you seem kind of upset. I was wonderin' if there was anything I can do. I don't know. My cook quit this morning. My analyst is away on vacation. My Mercedes broke down. I split my nail, and my husband is screwing somebody at the office. What did you have in mind? Stick of gum? Ha,ha,ha! This is the third weekend in a row he's found an excuse not to come to the country. No, I don't know. But knowing him it's probably some teenage airhead from the steno pool. The last one I caught him with was so dumb she thought dictation was some kind of S and M trip. Do you know my husband? I'm sorry. I can't hear you. Never mind. Didn't hear a thing. I'm gonna have to call you back. I'm so mad, I could spit. He looks twice as good today as the day we were married. I just look twice as old. Are you kiddin'? You look... Well, I just hope that when I'm his age, I can wake up every morning and find a woman as beautiful as you are lying next to me. Thank you. Oh, yeah Oh, yeah Oh, yeah Oh, yeah Oh, yeah Oh, yeah Beautiful Oh, yeah Oh, yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Turn in here. Please. Bring those inside. Charles. - May I help you with those, sir'? - Yeah. Thanks. What are you drinking? I can't really. I have to get back. God, I hate the country. Yeah, I can see how you'd be real miserable here. Who can live with so many trees? They suck up all the oxygen. No, actually, trees produce oxygen. Who are you? Mr. Wizard? What did you say your name was? Brantley. No,no,no. I mean your first name. That's it. Brantley. Well, Brantley, I don't know what you want out of Pemrose Corporation, but I'll tell you what you do not want. You don't ever, ever wanna become a corporate wife. I'll watch my step. Have another. Mmm. Thanks. I've run 8,000 miles on that tennis court chasing a fuzzy, little yellow ball with an oversized racket. Do my legs look heavy to you? No. I've swum laps from here to the moon in that pool. Do you see anything in this body that isn't firm? Tennis, swimming, aerobics, jogging, massage. Anything and everything to stay in shape, not that he'd ever notice. So, Brantley, do you know why I stay in shape? How 'bout a dip in the pool? No, wait! Are you serious? Listen, uh... Look,I have to get back. Listen, this is a tempting diversion, but I got a job. I don't know if this is such a good idea. Transportation, please. Yes. The young man from the mail room who drove me home? He's going to stay here and do a little work in my garden. See that he gets full credit on his time card. Thank you. Help me out of this, will you, dear? Whew! That was great. Thanks. I swim five miles a day. Supposed to tone my ass. Yeah, it works. Oh! Just when I thought it was safe to go back in the water. Ha! Ohh! Whoa! You sure this is a good idea? It's okay. I know the owner. Last one out of the... You sure your husband's not coming home? Who knows? He could be home any minute or several hours from now. Oh, my God. Oh! I'm going to see that my husband gives you a leg up. I think we've done pretty well so far by ourselves. I mean Pemrose. Uh... No. No, thanks. No, I'm gonna make it to the top by myself. Oh. God, you're adorable. Mmm! I could spend a week inside those sweet, unwrinkled eyes. Can I make a personal observation? Anything but the thighs. Somebody sold you a bill of goods and convinced you you had to be 21 forever. That's bullshit! I think you're terrific. I think the only thing wrong with you is your husband is a jerk. You're beautiful. You're intelligent. You're sensuous. Say that again! Which part? All Of it! Oh, no! What? What is it? It's the jerk. My husband. My uncle. Your what? Oh, God! That makes you... Auntie Vera? Oh... Oh! Oh, God! Ow! God! Oh, God. What's my mother going to say? I've disgraced my whole family. Oh, the hell you did! Not funny! Okay? This is not a funny moment in my life. Oh, relax, Brantley. Who's going to find out? I'm home! He's gonna find out. That's who's gonna find out. Don't worry! He won't fire you. There's no way I'm gonna get a raise out of this. Vera, what's the company car doing in the driveway? It broke down, darling. The driver had to take the train back to town. No, he didn't, darling. He's in here having trouble with his fly. Get back! Do you ever stop? No! How am I gonna get home now, huh? You wanna tell me that? Maybe we'll just have to keep you here and adopt you. You're a riot, Vera. Shit. Please, Lord, get me out of this. I'll go all over the world telling people not to screw the boss's wife. What are you doing in here? Feeling romantic. Oh. What's for dinner? Oh, Howard! You really know how to sweep a girl back onto her feet. Go back! Sit! Sit down! You look like death on a cracker, man. What happened to you? I was chased by a 200-pound dog with a mouth as big as my head. And that was the best thing that happened last night. What was the worst thing? I got laid. I'm not sure you got your priorities straight, Brantley. Oh! Hold the elevator. Good morning. Hi. The light ls in my eyes How can I see through What do I hold on to This time I've got to find Everything and more 'Cause that's what I'm fighting for We're entering a sensitive zone. The guy in that office, he just got canned. The mail room knew about it on Friday. He just found out today. Seems like the world is upside down Don't know where I'm going to But you know I'm turning it all around It's just something I've got to do No one knows what I feel inside Don't you know that I just can't hide I'm going to see that my husband gives you a leg up. No, thanks. No. No, I'm gonna make it to the top on my own. And if rules have to break Whatever it takes I know that it's my time It seems like the world is upside down I might have to break some rules You know you've got to try You know I'll turn it all around It's just something I've got to do It's something I've got to do Um... Hello. Tucker, where the hell have you been, huh? We got a problem in Midwest Distribution. What are you gonna do about it? What's,uh. What's the problem? Our stock is down another quarter-point this morning. Whose fault is that, Thomas? Nobody's fault, sir. It's a momentary lapse in the market. Whose fault is it, Thomas? Uh, it's Davis's fault, sir. His department hasn't been pulling its weight. What do you have to say for yourself, Davis? Uh, I've been having troubles at home, sir. My wife ran over the children's dog with her car, then we had to buy a new dog. Then the new dog chewed up this entire report that I'd been working on. Are you suggesting that your dog ate your homework, Davis? Well, in a way, yes, sir. This is not grade school, Davis! Run at the back of the line. Consider yourself on warning. Uh,yes,sir. Okay, everybody, check your pulse. Make sure you're exercising at the optimum level. I'm a bit above my level. I better stop running now. Maybe I'm above, too. I really don't care. Okay, everybody, run! I can't get anybody's approval for the extra two trucks! Tucker, what're you gonna do about it? All right, look. What does a boxcar cost? The transfer sheet shows that somebody is accumulating an enormous block of our stock. What do you think about that, Thomas? I think it's very encouraging, sir. Oh, you do, do you? Yes, sir. When a stock takes a dive and somebody buys a ton of it... It means that stock is on its way to a quick rebound. It means that the company is ripe for a hostile takeover! That's what I meant! A hostile takeover, sir? Yes. I'm afraid that's what we're looking at. I want each of you to examine your department and see where you can cut costs. Cut! Cut them to the core! We need to raise capital quickly so we can boost stock support. Right. Boost it! Boost it to the moon! You gonna put that in writin'? Yeah. Yeah! Look, you tell the trucking company that we have to service our customers. Now, if they're not going to help us, we're going to find somebody who will. Well, all right! That's what we need, some gutsy decisions around here! I'll get back to you. Okay. Bye. Yes! I have got to get that report by the end of the day, Art, or you're in the doghouse! I don't know. Mr. Prescott? I'm sorry this came in so late, sir, but it just arrived. It's about time! Uh... No. This isn't the men's room. They took the urinals out last week. I didn't like them. How about a paper cup? What? I'm sorry. I'm just about the only woman executive at Pemrose. Some days, I have a chip about the men's room. Sorry. Hey, nice office. Nice furniture. It goes with your hair. Thank you. I like your suit. it goes nicely with your nose. Well. This conversation isn't going very well. Thank you. There's enough talk in the world already. Good morning. That meant goodbye. I have work. Oh, yeah. Sorry. I have, uh, a lot of work myself. Good morning. I really swept her off her feet. All right, Foster. Let's do it! Hello. This is Carlton Whitfield, 4319. That's right. I'm still waiting for that secretary I requested last week. Well, I realize you're busy down there, but I'm typing my own letters and answering my own calls, and it's getting to be a pain. Empty? Well, I've been here a week, got my name on the door, got a desk full of supplies and got a geranium on my window ledge. What I don't have is a secretary. Okay, I'll tell you what. I'll have Personnel send a boy up from the mail room with the requisitions you need. Just send me my secretary, okay? Thank you very much. Whew! Got a memo here. Big cheese in 4319 wants his new secretary pronto. I got a memo here that's burning up my fingers. New suit in 4319 wants his personalized memos and stationery immediately. This guy is hot. Who? I don't know. Name's on the memo. Also, he wants nameplates for his door, and he wants it by noon. Okay? Mmm-hmm. Smile. You're late. I already done my rounds. You didn't punch in. Well, I couldn't wait to get to it. Boy, I love my work. Punch in, then run this up to Personnel and wait for an answer. Right. I... I'm Jean, your secretary. I'm not wearing anything. I see that. It was warm. Seems cooler now. I'll get dressed. Yes, sir. I'll move my stuff in. Great, Jean. Good idea. Ow Jean? Listen, I have some notes here. I also have some charts, some graphs, some tapes. They're all sorted into different departments. Can you read my handwriting? Sort of. Do your best. Oh, I need some poster boards, some colored pencils, some colored push pins, T-square, drawing table, lots of pencils, and my lunch. Chinese? I just can't wait 'til the day When you knock on my door Hey,4319? Uh,yeah. Now every time I go for the mailbox Great. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. You're coming around Good morning. Hi. Now I'm walking on sunshine, whoa-oh I'm walking on sunshine Whoa-oh I'm walking on sunshine Whoa-oh And don't it feel good Hey, all right now And don't it feel good Hey, yeah I used to think maybe you loved me Now I know that it's true And I don't want to spend my whole life Just a-waiting for you Now, I don't want you back for the weekend Not back for a day No, no, no I said, "Baby, I just want you back "And I want you to stay" Oh, yeah, I'm walking on sunshine Whoa-oh I'm walking on sunshine Whoa-oh I'm walking on sunshine Whoa-oh And don't it feel good Hey All right now And don't it feel good Yeah Oh, yeah And don't it feel good Hello again. Small world. Hello. Walking on sunshine Are you standing still for some purpose? Hey, I'm just soaking up the atmosphere. Whoa! Executive Lounge, huh? Care to do a little lounging? No, I'm busy. Ron, did you get those figures on transfer costs and insurance? Not yet. Big delay in Chicago. Damn! I really need them! Blame Chicago. Maybe I can help. I'm sorry? Transfer costs and insurance for what? By the time I explained it, I could find out myself. Ron! Big weenie. Hey, listen. Why don't you explain it to me over lunch, okay? I'll have the answer by dessert. I don't eat lunch. Why don't we start this again? Carlton Whitfield. And you're? Annoyed. Shit. You know, I'm just trying to be friendly. You picked a bad time. I was counting on those figures from Ron. Christy Wills. How do you do? Good. Terrible news. Just awful! Conference room, everybody. Come on, on the double. All right. So you don't eat lunch. Do you eat dinner? Occasionally. Tonight? Booked. Tomorrow night? Booked. All right, but don't beg, okay? It's embarrassing. Do you know what this is about? Who are you? Carlton Whitfield. New employee. I didn't get a memo on that. Oh, you will. All right. As long as I get the memo. The absolute worst has happened. We are the target of a corporate raid. Donald Davenport has filed a 13-D. A 13-D? He's acquired 5% of the stock, and this is definitely the beginning of a hostile takeover of our corporation. I think we all know what happened the last time Davenport took over a company. Everyone was canned! Mr. Prescott has sent down word of what he wants us to do. We are to recommend cuts in every department. Our job is to slash the red ink in every nook and cranny, because our company needs the cash for its defense. Anybody wanna fire the first shot? Kill Toledo. That's a good idea. If we close down our distribution centers in Toledo, Joplin, Jacksonville, we'll slash the red ink completely off the books. Whitfield, you don't have to raise your hand. Just speak. Thank you. Well... I know I'm new here and everything. And on the surface, these cuts seem like a good idea... "Seem like a good idea"? But closing down those distribution centers would be a big mistake. It so happens that those closings are exactly what Mr. Prescott wants. Well, then Mr. Prescott hasn't thought things through very well. I'm going to tell him you said that. Good. Look, olosing down those centers will put a strain on this company's cash position. In the long run, those cuts are going to hurt this company's innate value. Innate value? What is he talking about? Look, Davidson here will back me up on this. Davidson? I'm Proctor. He's Davidson. Well, damn it, Davidson, tell him! You wrote a memo to Mr. Thomas here explaining exactly what I'm talking about. Well, how did you know I wrote that memo? How did I know you wrote that memo? Who else could write that memo, Davidson? That memo was famous. That memo was a masterpiece. Clear, concise, to the point. That was the best damn memo I ever read! In fact, that memo wasn't even a memo. That memo was literature. You're welcome. Well, thank you. If you have finished your book report, I wonder, could you explain what your point is? All right. Look, the point is, we gotta be bold. That's my point. - We gotta build. We gotta expand. - Build? Expanding is the only way to help the situation. We gotta make this company so damn strong, Davenport won't be able to find anyone willing to give up Pemrose stock. It'll be too damn valuable. Then we'll buy his ass out! Absolutely! How old are you, Mister, uh, Mister... Whitfield. Yes. Twenty-four. Well, I think that you should keep quiet until you're at least 25. If I may, I don't think Mr. Whitfield's age should be an issue here. No one is interested in your opinion, Davis. We gotta block that takeover. I'm too old to look for another job. Nobody in their right mind would hire me. This meeting is going nowhere! Mr. Prescott's command stands! We are to find those cuts! Meeting adjourned. You'll pick up the coats. That looks like one only a lot smaller. Hey! Harvard! Where the hell've you been? Personnel, chief. You said to wait for an answer. They are real slow up there. There's something going on around here, Foster. I'm gonna be on you like a rash from now on. You got that? Like a rash. Ooh, won't the other guys get jealous? Whoa, heads! Down, boy. Come on. Ah, hold it. Right there. No! No! No! Ah, baby! You guys were good tonight. Oh, God! What are you doin' here? Brantley, darling, I heard you calling me telepathically, I'm very psychic. So, of course, I rushed right over. I would've used the phone. Mental telepathy's much more reliable. Aren't you gonna ask me in? Yeah. Sorry. Just a minute. Hmm. Father used to live like this before he founded Pemrose. Aunt Vera, I had a hell of a day, and I really have to get some sleep. Brantley, you're a young man. Young men have lots of energy. Look. We have a problem. What? Your husband is my boss. Oh, him. We won't tell him. Besides, Howard's working late tonight. On whom I have no idea. You look very beautiful tonight, Christy. Thank you. Now, there are some business things we should discuss. Do you think that this restaurant has an upstairs with beds in it? Howard, please! I don't feel altogether good about what's happened between us. Hmm. You are married. I'm not married. You are married! Well, yeah, lam married, but, um, she and I have an understanding. I love you. I don't really think so. Well, then I lust after you. That oughta be worth something. To you, perhaps. Now, let's talk business. I pitched the need for cutbacks at the meeting today, but a dissenting opinion was offered by Carlton Whitfield. Who's Carlton Whitfield? I didn't hire any Carlton Whitfield. Well, somebody did. Oh, my God. Donald Davenport. What? He may be a plant for Davenport gathering information on the takeover it's just like him. Look, I want you to get close to this guy Whitfield, find out what he's up to. You want me to spy on him? No, I don't want you to spy on him. I want you to get to be friends with him, and then rifle through his papers and tell me what you find. That's spying, Howard. Look, you have got to drop this incessant innocence. Life is harsh and ugly, and only the strong survive. Or didn't they teach you that at Harvard? What you got in there? My lunch. Your lunch? In a briefcase? Yeah. Ran out of brown bags. Hey, one of you guys got a spare pair of laces? Hey, man, I had a babe last night you wouldn't believe. Ta-nas out to here, man. She was fine. Where'd he go? Coming through. Excuse me. Take it easy. Come on. Sorry. Oh, what a nightmare. I'm all right though. Stuck again? I'm fine. I'm good. You okay? MANI You all right? Don't worry about me. Whoa.Thanks. Jean, transcribe these notes, will ya? There's some things on there I need right away. Oh. Make copies of this, copies of this. Did you get those supplies I needed? Yes, sir. Good. I'll be back later. Whoa! Good morning. Gentlemen. Good morning. Oh, God damn that thing! This thing stuck again? These elevators are stuck again? I'm sick and tired of these elevators always gettin' stuck. Hi, Jean. Will you take those to the cleaners? These are some of the notes I found in Whitfield's office. If you want anything more, you can go after it yourself. Do you think he's working for Davenport? I have no idea. I'm out of the spy business. We can't wait for Whitfield any longer. Let's get started. Davis here has prepared what I'm sure is a thoroughly incompetent analysis, but let's listen to him read it before we start criticizing it. Fine. I won't read it at all. Is that all right? You have a bad attitude. I'm gonna tell Mr. Prescott about it. Now, does anybody else have anything to say? Hi. Sorry, I'm late. Sorry. Hi, everybody. Uh, casual attire today, Whitfield? Huh? Yeah, uh, trousers, yeah. New product line. Testing 'em out. Pretty good. Good fabric. Good idea. Christy, you have something to say on this report I hope. Yes. I came up with some more cuts in the Middle States area. Let me pass these out. Why can't you be more like her, Davis? Mr. Prescott! Well, what a surprise! Art, I haven't received the full report on the cutbacks yet, so I thought I'd drop in and see what the problem is. Oh, no problem. No, sir. Everything is tip-top. Uh, Whitfield has pointed out a few wrinkles and we are going to iron those wrinkles out. Hmm. You don't mind if I stay for a few minutes, now, do you? Yes, sir. Which one of you is Whitfield? Oh, my God! Nose bleed! Dry heat! Get 'em all the time! Oh, God! Such a disappointment! Who was that? Well, that's the new boy, Whitfield. Sorry. Needed some supplies. Well, back to business. Oh, a few of these, and... Oh, God! You're from Receiving, aren't you? I see you're a workaholic. Yeah, well... I got a lot of work to do. What are you doing here so late? Oh, I'm a workaholic, too. Wow. You mean we have somethin' in common? So, what's all this supposed to be? On, it's the... It's the heart and soul of an idea you hated, Expansion in the Midwest. I don't hate it. I just think it's risky. Furthermore, Mr. Prescott doesn't want it. It's a waste of time to pursue it. But if something's right, how can it be a waste of time? There is no right or wrong, there is only opinion. You know, in some states, you can get arrested for saying that. All right, convince me. Convince me then that your opinion is the right one. All right. Take a look at this. And this. And, uh... Yeah. Peruse that. Oh! Why do you keep saying the exact opposite of what I say? 'Cause you keep saying such stupid things. Will you take a look at these figures? They prove that the elimination of salaries would create a war chest for the defense of the Pemrose Corporation. Can't you see that? No,I can%. I'll tell you why. Closing those factories and laying up people is just gonna send a panic through the market. That might happen or that might not happen. No, it will happen. Look. All right, close the centers, put thousands of people out of work. You're gonna waste all your profits on unemployment contributions, severance pay, union lawsuits. Are you all right? My blood sugar's dropping. What? It's just my mind wandered in the middle of what you were saying. It means I need food. Do you wanna get a bite? Yeah, yeah, come on. I'll buy you dinner. No, no, no. Dutch. Just tell me one more time what your solution is to this crisis. We don't cut. We expand. I agree. Expansion is a positive reaction to the universe. While retraction or cutting back or pulling off, those are all negative forces. I used to be very negative, and then I took this personality workshop, my whole life turned around. Hiya. My name's Sheila. You make a good-lookin' couple. How long you been goin' together? About 20 minutes. Oh, first date, huh? Good luck. No, we're business colleagues. Colleagues. Who needs that? You should go together. You look good together. Oh, oh, did you wanna order? Yeah, we need to see some menus, Sheila. Menus! I'm sorry. I'm studying to be an actress. I'm a much better actress than I am a waitress. Concentration, that's my big problem. I'll be right back. Well, Sheila's in favor of expansion. We should bring her to our next executive meeting. I think Art Thomas would like her a lot. Sheila is also in favor of us seeing each other. Yes, well, Sheila is clearly a nut. I heard that. You should try to be more positive with your life, or you're gonna wind up miserable. She heard me. I'm having a nice time. How about you? Yes, very nice. Well, it's pleasant walking. I mean, I don't want to imply anything. About your expansion plan, I did some checking and it turns out we can get some tax breaks if we put up a facility in the Midwest region. You checked? Earlier today? That's great. But the powers that be seem to want the cutting, but I... I've been trying to stay open to your ideas, your business ideas. That's great. Okay, so you're open to my business ideas. Now, how about my after-work ideas? Don't push. Yesterday, I thought you were obnoxious. You know, a lot of people start out that way. They usually end up gettin' married. Don't hold your breath. Come on. Look, I think you're secretly crazy about me. And I think you'd feel a lot better if you'd just admit it. Come on, you'll like me. I'm an acquired taste. My dad insisted on buying me this. A round trip ticket back to Kansas. You know, I almost traded it in a couple of times. But now, it's kind of a symbol. The day I use this ticket is the day New York has beaten me. You know, I just noticed something. You're kind of a mess. Thank you. Did anybody ever tell you that? You're the first. So what I was wonderin' was... how you can be so incredibly beautiful and be such a mess? When two people get involved on a project together, there's a danger of getting emotionally involved. That would be bad. They confuse the intensity of their involvement on the project and mistake it as a relationship. What are you, a shrink? It's happened to me. It's actually still happening to me, I guess. And then... The project ends and they find they don't have anything to talk about. Okay, it's settled then. We won't get involved while we're working on this project. Right. Right. So who is he? Who? Who? My competition. Just a guy. All right. So why don't we call this guy? Tell him you met a new guy, the whole thing is off. I can't call him. Why not? His wife might answer the phone. Big mistake. Yeah, well, let's not talk about it. I have done a lot of stupid things, but I have never... I bet you have. Ever? Even Been involved with a married man. Well, he was sort of separated when we started. Yeah, well, it turned out to be a lie. The whole thing was a mistake. But we live and we learn and we move on... That wasn't bad. Thank you. Can you do it again just as good? I could try. Where were you all weekend? You can at least begin with good morning. I'm madder than hell! I want to know why you weren't answering your phone. I owe a lot to you, Howard. I'll always be grateful to you for the chance you gave me in this company and the things I've learned. What is this? What... What are you leading up to? I wanna work with you. I respect you more than you know, but... I can't be involved with you outside the office anymore. Hello? Yes, June, I'm looking for the transportation costs from Toledo dating September... I'll call you back. Look, I'm not gonna pressure you on this. I want you to take your own time and decide what's best for you. Thank you. I do think the timing's a little ironic, though. I was gonna tell you last night that Vera and I have agreed on terms for a divorce. I only wish that Vera and I could have worked things out sooner. That way, you and I might have had a chance. This arrived this morning by messenger. Davenport has called an emergency meeting of the Board of Directors for Monday morning, and, uh, he's offering to take over the company. I'm inviting all key personnel to spend the weekend at my house in Litchfield. I'd like you to be there, too. Of course I'll be there. Uh, one more question. Yes? Personal. Just out of curiosity, who were you with last night? Whitfield. Carlton Whitfield. It was all business. Some of his ideas are brilliant. Well, I'm looking forward to hearing 'em. I have to talk to him today. Howard, those notes that I took from Whitfield's office, I'd like them back, please. Of course. I'll get them to you. Heads up. Thanks. What's your hurry? What's goin' on? I got a special delivery here marked urgent. I'm watching you, Foster. Just remember, every minute, God is watching you. Excuse me, miss, I'm a reporter for the The New York Times. I couldn't help noticing. You look like a woman who's recently been made love to. Not here. Oh, you weren't made love to here. Was it anywhere within the New York State lines, because we usually let The Philadelphia Gazette handle Pennsylvania. What's up? You seem kind of upset? I hate men. Well, I'm glad I'm not one of 'em. Listen. There's something I gotta explain to you. I have something to tell you, too. I did something I wished I hadn't done and... All right, look. This weekend? Can't. I have some loose ends I have to tie up. Good! I'll take care of it. Uh, have a nice weekend. I'll see you Monday. Ho! Excuse me, miss. I'm sorry. Excuse me! Ooh! You didn't see me. I wasn't here. Ow! Ooh! Where is he? Where'd he go? I didn't see him. He wasn't here. Hey. You still here? You look great. Whoa! The end of the second lap, you still got a comfortable lead. Yo. Excuse me again. Hi, boss. Aw, shit! Bye, boss. Brantley? Hi. What are you doing here? Looking for Whitfield. Got a delivery for him. Why are you wearing a suit? Because of the funeral. Whose funeral? A friend. He died. We buried him. What is all this stuff? Uh, production performance charts from the Midwest region, l guess. Where is Whitfield? He's not here? Have you ever seen Whitfield, Brantley? Yes, sir. Well, lots of times. I deliver here every day. Great guy. How does he get all this information? Well, it's available in most quarterly stock reports... Probably. Take this up to my office. Yes, sir. You're not comin'? I'll be there in a minute. Right. One question. What the hell are you doin'? Having a nervous breakdown. No wonder. Look, nothin' good can come from this, Brantley. If you get caught, you get canned. If you don't get caught, you become one of them, a suit. It's a no-win situation. I'm still a half a step ahead of them, pal. I hear music when I look at you Aunt Vera, hi. How are you? I'm in the mood for love Simply because you're near me A medley. Gee, that's nice. Why you singing a medley, Aunt Vera? I get no kick from champagne Mere alcohol doesn't thrill me at all Please, don't sing anymore, Aunt Vera. OW! Oh, God! I haven't sung in years, Brantley. You see what you do to me? I'm wild again He's on his way up. He's gonna be here any minute. Beguiled again Why are you doing this? Ow. I'm going to have you for lunch. Can't I get you a ham and cheese? Look at that cute little Adam's apple. Aunt Vera! Listen. Oh, shit. Since the last time we met, there's been a change. Yes, nice suit, Brantley. OW! Look, what I mean to say is... Oh, Christ! I'm not free anymore. What, you're gonna charge me? You're getting awfully cynical. Does your mother know about this? I'm not available! Oof! Oh, good, you're not gonna charge me. Oh! Don't worry, Brantley. I don't wanna marry you. I'm already married. I just wanna love you. Love. I don't mean love as in two star-crossed virginettes running through the clover. Nothing icky like that. I'm a practical woman. You should be a practical young man. If you would just relax and let me, I could steer you through these shark-infested waters of this stupid company just like I steered Howard. Look, I like you. I really like you. But I gotta tell you. I've become seriously and emotionally involved with someone who isn't my aunt. I forgive you, Brantley. Listen! There is someone else in my life! I got it. I got it. I don't care. There's someone else in my life, too. Maybe we should introduce your girlfriend to my husband. Then we both have the same people in our lives. Look, I don't wanna get rough with you, but I'll belt you around if I have to. Ooh. Jesus Christ, Vera! I'm gonna get fired. Give me a break. Don't whine, Brantley. Life is too short. Before you know it, you'll be 25, wondering where it all went. What the hell is this? He fainted. Fainted? Dead away. Actually, he, um, hit his head. Yeah, it was a light fainting. Uh, knocked out. Hit his head on what? The floor. The ceiling. Which one? Both. Neither. What the hell happened? Uh... Uh, Uncle Howard, it was like this. Uh, I walked into your office, and, um...and I saw this beautiful woman who I had never seen before in my life. And imagine my surprise when I found out it was my Aunt Vera. Uh, well, he was so excited, his blood pressure shot up, and then he fell and hit his head on the floor. Out like a light. So I crawled deliriously to the sofa. Oh, and I rushed to his aid. And you walked in. And shame on you for not telling me our nephew's working for the company. Our nephew works for the company. Now, I've got a million things to take care of today. - Why are you here? - Lunch. We were supposed to have lunch. I've had my lunch. You don't seem to realize... Oh, I do realize, Howard. So, you won't mind if Brantley and I go out to lunch to get better acquainted? Fine. No. No, I can't. I gotta go to a funeral. You said you already went. You know, in my grief, I forgot. Howard, why don't we bring Brantley out to the house this weekend for the party? I mean, he is family. Yes, you know, that might be a very good idea. No, you see, I don't think I'd fit in, Aunt Vera. Oh, but you do fit in, Brantley. Oh, God. I'll make sure he has a wonderful time. All right. It's settled. Now, can I get back to work here? Be nice to have a playmate for the weekend. You wanted to see me, sir? Oh, yeah, Brantley. I want you to know I've been watching you very closely lately. You have? I know everything you've been up to. You do? Everything. Sir, I can explain this. See, I didn't know who that was... I know, for example, that you've been working hard in the mail room. You've kept your eyes open and your nose clean. You stayed out of trouble. I'm gonna reward you for that one of these days. But first, I'd like to ask a favor of you. You name it, sir. We'll talk about it while we work out. You like to sweat, don't you, Brantley? Your Aunt Vera seems to have taken an instant liking to you. I hadn't noticed. Oh, it's obvious. I think she'd like to get to know you a lot better. I wanna encourage that. I'd like you to spend lots of time with Aunt Vera at the party this weekend. Men like us can't be locked into one woman, Brantley. We need variety. Keeps us young, energetic, competitive. You get my meaning? Of course you do. We're men of the world here, right? Now, a problem has developed. I have a friend, a companion... A girl. She's been getting a little antsy lately. Mmm, wants me to leave my wife. Well, I'm not about to leave my wife, not for her, not for anyone. I just need a little time to get the situation under control again. Understand? Not altogether. Well, I'm inviting her out to the party this weekend, and we're gonna spend a little time together, which is why I need you to keep your Aunt Vera occupied as much as possible. Get the picture? Yeah, widescreen. But I got some big plans this weekend. Fine. I won't forget this favor, believe me. No, you don't understand. See, I can't... Great. It's all settled then. I've got my eye out for some rapid advancement for you, Brantley. You seem to be a young man with a lot on the ball. Keep it up. Schmuck. Ooh, that's nice. Oh, excuse me. Brantley, darling. I was afraid you wouldn't come. Vera. I'm going to introduce you to the most powerful money men in New York. And if you can do to them what you've done to me... I can't do that. I mean bowl them over, darling. You're irresistible when you turn on that boyish charm. Hi, Whitfield. Whitfield? Yeah, it's my middle name. Brantley Whitfield... Hi, Carlton. Carlton Foster. You go by all those names? Yeah, I got a lot of 'em. My parents couldn't make up their mind. My monogram looks like an eye chart. You're always surprising me, Brantley. That's your most attractive quality. Promise me you'll never stop. Ah. I promise. Oh, good. Now. Roland Owens, First Federal. Very rich. We start with him. He made his money the really old-fashioned way. He inherited it. And see the man playing tennis with the elbow brace, the knee strap and the glove? Vernon S. Fletcher, Wall Street's iron man. If he likes you, you can write your own ticket, and he'll like you. Who's the tall guy over there with all the girls? Good eye, Brantley. Harley McMasters, First Multinational. Recently divorced. They're all dying to be the second Mrs. First Multinational. Listen, Vera, you're not gonna tell anybody I work in the mail room, are ya? Trust me, Brantley. I got Howard his key to the executive washroom. I can do the same thing for you. Christy? Here are Whitfield's notes. Impressive. Thank you. This is supposed to be a business trip, remember? Oh, baby, how can I concentrate on business? Howard, let me go! Ha! Ah! Oh, Carlton! What are you doing here? Hey. Would Carlton Whitfield miss a party? I'm so glad you're here. So am l. Quick! Stop! Not here! You ought to be ashamed of yourself. No, I don't. Wait. I gotta tuck. You go first. Go first. Okay. How do I look? Come on. Come on. Well, I've had a look at that preliminary report, and I'm satisfied that the proposed cutbacks are our best line of defense. Thank you, sir. We have tried to cut hard and to cut deep. Yes. Well, the job was adequately done. Well, thank you, sir. I think Whitfield is right, and this report is wrong. Hello, sir. Have you seen Christy? No, I haven't, sir. Not for a while. Have you seen Christy? Uh, sorry. No, I haven't. Oh, Jack. Yes, Howard. Uh, have you seen Christy Wills? She's talking to Whitfield. No? Aw, come on. It's my best, Christy. It's my best one. Would you excuse us for a minute, Christy? Brantley, did you know that Whitfield is here? Yeah, I think he was here earlier, but he left. No. Somebody saw him a few minutes ago talking to Christy. Now, I've got my reasons. I want you to stay close to Christy, and keep Whitfield away from her. Can you do that for me? Hey, I'm your man. Good. I knew I could count on you. What was that all about? Well, he wants me to stay as close to you as possible. He told you that? Yeah. I don't know. I guess he thinks we make a good couple. Vera? Are you awake? Oh, yeah Oh, yeah Oh, yeah Beautiful Even more beautiful Oh, yeah Oh, yeah Oh, yeah Christy? Uh!Ah! Beautiful Oh, yeah Oh, yeah Beautiful Oh, yeah Oh, yeah Darling? Sweetheart, it's Howard. Go away! Let's make this a night to remember. Oh, darling, I know you're angry with me, but think of all the things that we've meant to each other. I want to marry you, Christy. Oh, don't be that way, baby. What do you say? Will you marry me? No, but I'd like to beat the shit out of you! Wait 'til I get my... Brantley, who is that? Oh, my God! Oh, my God! The sexual revolution is over. Everybody, out of bed. What are you doing in Christy's bed, Brantley? I'm talking to you, Howard. Who's Brantley? Brantley is the guy who just found his stolen notes in your bag. Those are Whitfield's notes, and they are not stolen. He gave them to me himself. You were so grateful to him, you climbed into bed and asked him to marry you. What are you talking about? I climbed into bed with you. Baloney! You thought you were climbing into bed with her. Wait. Now, when I came in, he was in bed with Whitfield. Whitfield? He wasn't even here. Are you blind? Who's that? That's Brantley. Brantley? So this is the bimbo you've been screwing around with at the office? Who are you calling a bimbo? If the shoe fits... What's that supposed to mean? Why didn't you just ask me for those? I would have given 'em to you. I was gonna tell you about that. It just happened before I really knew you. So when we were in bed, that whole thing was James Bond time, right? No! You went to bed with Brantley? Don't worry about it, Howard. She's probably got microfilm pictures of the whole thing. What were you doing in bed with my nephew? Whitfield's your nephew? This is Brantley Foster. He works in the mail room. The mail room? You mean you're not an executive? Let me get this straight. Brantley is Whitfield? That's right. Brantley is Whitfield. Whitfield is Brantley. And Christy is the bimbo. Well, now that we've all had Mouseketeer roll call, I'm just going to go call my lawyer. Now wait a minute. Christy is not the bimbo I was screwing around with at the office. People better stop calling me "bimbo." It was an entirely different bimbo, altogether. That's fine. How many bimbos would you say there were? I misspoke myself. There weren't any bimbos at all. Except Christy. - Right. No! - Ha! Vera! Vera! The question is, how many people did you sleep with to get to the top? That was a very expensive vase, you bitch. Shut up! Now listen. Whatever I did was my business, not yours. No, you mean it was company business. That's right, and that's all it was, business. Wow. Let me tell you somethin', sweetheart. You're very good at your job. You mean I was workin' for a guy from the mail room? You're not an executive? He's too good to be an executive. Disappointed? Yes! I was having fun on this job. You had all this energy and all these crazy ideas. And you kept takin' your pants off. I don't want you to go. Here. Here's a little somethin' to remember me by. Thank you. Brantley, why you lookin' so sad? I don't know. I just thought it'd work out better, you know? The job or the girl? The job. To hell with the girl. Yeah. You sound real convincing. Well, look at it this way, pal. For a few weeks, you sat up here in the lofty atmosphere of the big cheeses. You had a nice view of Manhattan and a clean lunchroom to eat in. Hell, you did more in two months than most people do in a lifetime. Yeah, I'm gonna miss it. The job or the girl? Goin' back to Kansas? No, I'm not goin' back to Kansas. I came to New York to succeed. Oh, yeah? I hear there's an opening in the mail room. Hey, you should talk. You're just as unemployed as I am. Yeah, but not for long. I have contacts all over town. Oh, yeah, there's always another Prescott around. Low blow, Foster. Dirty pool. I call 'em like I see 'em. Yeah, you're perfect, right? I never slept with the boss. No, you slept with the boss's wife. Hey, she seduced me. He seduced me. What's the difference? I couldn't help it. You went willingly. Oh, I see. You were tied up in chains. Is that it? All right, I'll tell you what the difference is. I'm the one who thought you were a nice guy. I am a nice guy! You're a rat! You lied to me, deceived me, then acted as judge and jury in a situation you knew nothing about. I know enough to know you were spying on me. I wasn't spying on you! You lied to me! And I won't be spying on you anymore! No, you won't, 'cause if I see you... Sorry. This car is full. We could never pull that off. How do you know? You're lookin' at a kid from the mail room who moved into a top executive position. Are you gonna tell me I can't pull it off? But you didn't. I almost did. We could pull this off. Whoa, whoa! Listen. I'm gonna need your help, both of you. Is it somethin' I could get fired for? Absolutely. I like it. Listen, Jean, see if you can find Harley McMasters' phone number. And get some food up here. Some Chinese. Chinese sound good to you? Of course, Mr. Davenport, we realize that you'll want to move some of your own people into the, uh, medium control positions here at Pemrose. Naturally. What we're concerned about, quite frankly, is the upper management positions. Most of 'em will have to go. Oh, no. I see. But a handful of 'em, who have been so helpful, like yourselves, of course, will be stayin' as long as you like. Well, then I see nothing to stand in the way of the immediate merger of our two companies. I don't know. Is this the place? It is! Hey, good. Sorry we're late. Get them out of here. I'm sorry. This is a private meeting. I have to ask you to leave. Hold these, will you? Thanks a lot. Call building security. Whoa, whoa, Howard, relax. Listen. On behalf of the personnel in the mail room, the girls in the secretarial pool, the female executives here at Pemrose, we wanted to give our blessing to this little merger. Who in hell are these people? Is it Don? Donny! How ya doin'? Listen, Don, you mind if I stand up? I think better when I'm movin' around. I gotta tell you, Don. At first, the idea of this merger made me as nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs. But then I realized I was wrong. The combination of our products and your distribution capabilities could vault Pemrose right to the top of the market. So glad you approve, whoever you are. Now if you get the hell out of here, we'll finish the job. I can't do that for you, Don. See, the problem here is management. Things were bad enough when Howard was running the company. But now we got a guy like you to deal with, too. Get them out of here, Prescott, now! He can't, Don. You see, Brantley made arrangements to buy 5% of the stock in your company, Davenport Enterprises, this morning. We're buying you out. What? Get in there. That's right! We've initiated a takeover of Davenport Enterprises in a proxy fight for the Pemrose Corporation. This way, Mr. McMasters. Gentlemen, good afternoon. Oh. These are my financial advisers. They agreed to lend me the money to finance this takeover. How are you? Brantley. Surely you're not going to invest in some crackpot scheme cooked up by a kid who used to work in our mail room. Not at first, Howie. But see, I had an ace in the hole, a major stockholder in the company with the clout and support I needed. Don, I want you to meet the new chairperson of the Pemrose Corporation and the daughter of the founder, Vera Prescott. Afternoon, ladies and gentlemen. Brantley and I are very old friends. And when he told me his wonderful ideas for running the company, I knew he was the man for the job. I think we all understand your real motivation here, Vera. Oh, I admit I felt some attraction towards Brantley at the beginning, but as you've always told me, Howard, love isl ove, but business is business. You've run Daddy's company into the ground, Howard. And I believe these people here can bring it back to where it belongs again. Now, up, Howard, out of that chair. Don't be ridiculous. I'm not about to resign my position. Oh, you don't have to, Howard. You're fired. What? Vera, you can't! Oh, yes, I can. You see, Mr. Davenport, as of this afternoon, I control 50.1% of the voting stock. You, too, Art. You're history. Brantley, Christy, Jean, Melrose. Ah, gentlemen, just in time. Mr. Prescott and his aide have disrupted a very important meeting. Would you please escort them out of the building? Vera! Why this open hostility? I don't understand it. How did you get so... Would you take charge of the meeting now, Brantley? I do not deserve this. Excuse me. S-U-C-C-E-S-S That's the way we spell success S-U-C-C-E-S-S Feel free to do it amongst yourselves if you like. So have you been to Kansas? No. What's in Kansas? Well, I figured we'd take the private Pemrose jet, drop in on the folks. They're gonna want to meet you. Why haven't I met you before? Baby, you ain't been hangin' out in the mail room. Ooh, the mail room. l like that sound. Charlie, we got that same problem with elevator three again. I don't believe this. This elevator's stuck again. Small-town boy So clean and sweet Dressed and polished for the big-time dreams Got a letter from his mama and a boyish grin Close his eyes for women and a real gentleman, yeah You know there's nothin' like havin' that wall against your back To put your ass in gear and your mind on track When wheels start turnin' things start fallin' into place You'd be surprised what you can do It's all intelligence and taste, yeah Sometimes the good guys finish first Sometimes your best is all it takes You know that sometimes the good guys finish first Sometimes the good guys Finish first Finish first Where to, sir? The opera, Rattigan. Yes, sir. Back-door logic Turn your head around Use the front door and avoid the crowds They'll try to tell you that it can't be done Beatin' big boys at their own game is half the fun Hey, he)' Sometimes the good guys finish first Sometimes your best is all it takes You know that sometimes the good guys finish first Sometimes the good guys Whoa Sometimes the good guys finish first Walking a straight line in reverse You know that sometimes the good guys finish first Sometimes the good guys Sometimes the good guys finish first Sometimes your best is all it takes You know that sometimes the good guys finish first Sometimes the good guys Finish first Think of it, ey The world's in the palm of my hand Run a comb through my hair Headin' out for some new foreign land And all this could seem like a dream out the door With everyday people face down on the floor I always said I could make it and be who I am There's a new look in sight What a change for the new modern man With all this it seems like I'm dyin' for more The streets are on fire Never seen it before It's like the sound of electric guitars Worlds collide and hearts will be broken Over and over It's the same every day Why can't I say what has never concerned me The secret of my success ls I'm liivin' Twenty-five hours a day It's amazing to me What a fool will believe to get by With a big change of your mind I can live I could fly The harder they come the harder they fall I never say maybe and I go for it all Just like the sound of electric guitars Worlds collide and hearts will be broken Over and over It's the same every day Why can't I say what has never concerned me The secret of my success ls I'm liivin' Twenty-five hours a day |
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