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The Subject Was Roses (1968)
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Across the morning sky All the birds are leaving Oh, how can they know it's time for them to go? Before the winter fire We'll still be dreaming I do not count the time Who knows where the time goes? Who knows where the time goes? Sad, deserted shore Your fickle friends are leaving Ah, but then you know It's time for them to go But I will still be here I have no thought of leaving I do not count the time Who knows where the time goes? Who knows where the time goes? And I'm not alone While my love is near me And I know it will be so Till it's time to go So come the storms of winter And then the birds in spring again I do not fear the time Who knows how my love grows? Who knows where the time goes? Looks like a lovely day. Yeah. Timmy still asleep? I haven't heard him. Breakfast ready? I thought we'd all have breakfast together. No. I have to go downtown. Today? Ruskin wants to see me. I'll stop off at St. Francis, offer a prayer of thanks. All those casualties, he never got a scratch. We're very lucky. You think he enjoyed the party? He seemed to. You know, it's the first time I ever saw him take a drink. He drank too much. You don't get out of the army every day. He was sick during the night. Sure! It's probably the excitement. It was the whiskey. You should have stopped him. For three years, he's gotten along fine without anybody telling him what to do. I had to hold his head. Nobody held his head in the army. That's what he said. But that didn't stop you. He's not in the army anymore. It was a boy that walked out of this house three years ago. It's a man that's come back in. You sound like a recruiting poster. You're ready to repeat the old mistakes. Mistakes? Pardon me. You said mistakes. It was a slip of the tongue. I'd like to know what mistakes you're referring to. Can I have my coffee? I'd really like to know. He was 18 when he went away. Until that time, he showed no special skill at anything. You treated him like he was a protege. I think you mean prodigy. What I really mean is baby. For a baby, he certainly did well in the army. I didn't say he was a baby. You treated him like one. You were surprised he did well. You didn't think he'd last a week. "Bless us and save us," said Mrs. O'Davis. Know why you were surprised? "Joy, joy," said Mrs. Malloy. Because you never understood him. "Mercy, mercy," said old Mrs. Percy. I never doubted he'd do as well as anyone else. Where he's concerned you never doubted, period. If he came in and said he could fly, you'd help him out the window. If you're saying I have confidence in him, you're right. Why not? Who knows him better? Coffee's excellent. He's exceptional. Here we go again. Yes, exceptional. In what way? I refuse to discuss it. A person who's going to be famous usually drops a few clues by the time they're 21. I didn't say famous. I said exceptional. What's the difference? You wouldn't understand. Here's something you better understand. You can't treat him as though he'd never been away. He's not a kid. If you had stopped him from drinking too much, that would have been treating him like a kid? This is where I came in. He was trying to keep up with you, and you knew it. You sound like you're jealous. You two were so busy drinking, you hardly paid attention to anybody else. You are jealous. Don't be absurd. He and I got along better yesterday than we ever did before, and you're jealous. Well, well, well. Can't Ruskin wait till Monday? No. And don't pretend you're disappointed. What a charming little breakfast you and he will have together. You're welcome to stay. My ears are burning already. I've never said a word against you. And you know it. Don't forget my excursion to Montreal. It was always your own actions that turned him against you. And the convention. Don't leave that out. The curtains. The curtains for Timmy's room... they're coming today. I don't know anything about curtains. Yes, you do. I do not! They'll be $10. What's the matter with the old ones? They're worn out. They look all right to me. They aren't all right. $10 for curtains. Timmy will want to bring friends home. The old squeeze play. Are you going to give me the money? Here. I need $5.00 for the house. I gave you 15 yesterday. That went for the party. That party cost close to $100. It was worth it. Did I say it wasn't? Here. Morning. Champ. Morning, son. I thought you were going to sleep all day. I smelled the coffee. Your mother tells me you were sick during the night. I'm fine now. A little rocky myself. I wonder why. What time is your appointment? 11:15. It's 10:35. Mr. Ruskin wants to see me. Yeah, it's to bad. Why? I thought we'd ride up to the lake house. Why don't you? You know I can't. This thing with Ruskin means a sure sale. I understand. We'll go tomorrow. My mother expects us for dinner tomorrow. How about next Saturday? All right. Swell. I understand none of your old clothes fit. Yeah, that's right. I'll take you downtown on Monday. We'll get you some new ones. All right. Hey. I still think I can take you. I wouldn't be surprised. What did you say this one was for? That's a combat infantry badge. How about that! It's not as important as it sounds. The Freeman boy dead. The mullin boy crippled. We're very lucky. I know. I'm stopping off at St. Francis to offer a prayer of thanks. See you later. Right. How did you sleep? Fine. How's he feeling? All right. Looks a lot older. It's been three years. How's his business? Who knows? Coffee market's off. I hope you're hungry. Can't get over the change in him. Guess what we're having for breakfast. It's not just the way he looks. Guess what we are having for breakfast. What? Guess. I don't know. Yes, you do. No. Sure you do. What is it? What's your favorite? Bacon and eggs? Now I know you're teasing. No, I'm not. I forgot what a tease you were. No, I'm not teasing. Waffles. We're having waffles. Fine. You used to be crazy about waffles. I still am. I've got the waffle batter ready. Swell. Your first morning home, you're entitled to whatever you want. I want waffles. I used the last egg in the batter. I want waffles! Really? Cross my heart. All right. I see a new grocer. Quite a few new stores. Pop said the bremens moved. And the costellos. Remember old zimmer the tailor? Sure. A few weeks ago, a woman came into his shop with a coat she wanted altered. Zimmer started to fix it, then very politely excused himself, went up to the roof, and jumped. No one knows why. Who was the woman? Mrs. Levin. That explains it. That's not funny. I'm sorry. What a thing to say! I said I'm sorry. I'm surprised at you. Bless us and save us. What? Bless us and save us... as in, "bless us and save us," said Mrs. O'Davis. "Joy, joy," said Mrs. Malloy. What's the matter? I never expected to hear such nonsense from you. It beats swearing. You used to cover your ears when your father said it. I'll never say it again. Don't talk to me like that! I'm sorry. I don't know what's wrong with me this morning. I don't think I slept well. Too much excitement, the party and all. Will you have bacon with it? Just the waffles will be fine. Did you like the party? Yes. I still can't believe you're here. I find it a little hard to believe myself. You are here. Want to pinch me? Go ahead. Go on. There. You believe it now? What are you doing? Cut it out. Cut it out! One pinch to a customer. House rule. The waffles must be ready. The light on the iron went out. Isn't that what that means when that little light goes out? What's the matter? What's the matter? What's wrong? What is it? What is it? They stuck. What? Why did they have to stick today? What, the waffles? I can't remember the last time they stuck. What is that to cry about? I've been looking forward to this morning for three years, and nothing's right. Why do you say that? Not one thing. What isn't right? Not one single thing. Will you please stop? The things you've been saying... Your attitude. What things? What attitude? You haven't even asked about Willis. How is he? Every time I look at you, you avoid me. That's ridiculous. You're doing it now. I am not! How could you forget waffles were your favorite? I just forgot. Then you must have forgotten a lot of things. I'll tell you one thing I didn't forget... the dance... The one we were going to have the first morning I was home. What made you think of that? It's been on my mind all along! I'll bet. I was about to turn on the radio when you started crying. I'll bet. If you're through, I'll do it now. Are you through? I haven't danced for so long, I've probably forgotten how. I can't remember the last time I danced. Come on. You really want to? Yes! Well, you asked for it. That-a girl. Here we go. Forgot how to dance. Who are you kidding? I guess it's one of those things you never forget. Remember this? Have you been taking lessons? Of course. Come here often? First time. Me likewise. By yourself? With a girl friend. That's all the time we have on dance parade... Don't move. Tomorrow for more music for your dancing pleasure. What do you say? The spirit's willing. Let's go! 1, 2, 3, go! Not bad, not bad. What will the neighbors think? The worst! Hang on! We're doing fine now! I can't do anymore. We're going into the homestretch! Doing fine! I'm getting dizzy! Once more! Let's go! Hang on! Hang on, mom! I can't! Are you all right? I think so. I'm dead. So am I. Know something? What? I really believe you're here now. So do I. What are you going to do today? I don't know. Why don't you come to mamma's with me? We're going there tomorrow for dinner. Willis would love to see you. I'll see him tomorrow. When we told him you were coming home, he began to sing. First time he's done that in months. All right, I'll go. We won't stay long. All right. Well, hello. Don't get up on my account. We were dancing and fell down. What did you forget? Nothing. Why'd you come back? I changed my mind. Still want to take a ride to the lake? It's a date. What about Ruskin? The hell with him. Still want to go? Yes. What about Willis? What about Willis? Timmy was going to see him this afternoon. I'll see him tomorrow. I told him you'd be over today. Before you even asked me? I felt sure you'd want to. You had no right to do that. Well, what will I tell him? Tell him I'll be there tomorrow. He'll be disappointed. That's not my fault. If we're going to the lake, we better get started. I just have to get my tie. You haven't eaten. We'll grab something on the way. I came out of St. Francis, started for the subway. I was halfway there when I thought of Mr. Freeman. What wouldn't he give to spend a day with his son? Made me turn around and come back. You're mad. Well, you told me to take him to the lake. And you always do what I tell you. Bless us and save us. Corporal Cleary reporting for duty, sir! Kiss your mother good-bye. That's not a duty. So long, mom. Come on. We won't be late. I haven't told that one in years. I was considered a very funny fellow, thanks to you. I guess you must have seen some pretty bad things. Not as much as a lot of others. Maybe you'd rather not talk about it. I don't mind. I'd like to hear what you have to say. I don't know where to begin. Anything that comes to mind. You want to hear the bravest thing I ever did? Sure. The first night we were in combat, I slept with my boots off. Go on. That's it. Doesn't sound like much, does it? Not offhand. The fellows who eventually cracked up were all guys who couldn't sleep. If I hadn't decided to take my boots off, I'd have been one of them. I see. Want to hear the smartest thing I did? Yes. I never volunteered. The fact is, I wasn't a very good soldier, pop. You did everything they asked you. Good ones do more. You'd have been a good one. What makes you say that? I can tell. Thanks. Cheers. Cheers. So they really went for the old man's jokes? Yes. You know, it's one of the big regrets of my life I was never in the service. I know. The day world war I was declared, I went to the recruiting office. I supported my family. They turned me down. I know. It's always bothered me, missing out on the whole thing. I keep wondering what difference it might have made in my life, but then I wonder how I'd have made out. I wouldn't have settled for a desk job. I'd have gotten to the front. I'm sure of that. But once there, how would I have done? Fine. How do you know? You're a born fighter. They say some guys who are terrors as civilians turned to jelly when they heard those bullets. Not you. Well, doesn't seem so. You can't be sure. See, that's always bothered me. Can I say something to you? Sure. You won't take it the wrong way? No. I owe you an apology. For what? You were always sick, always home from school with one thing or another, I never thought you'd last in the army. Neither did I. When Dr. Grossburg heard they took you. He said it was ridiculous. They put you in the infantry, he said it was inhuman. And when I survived? Said it was a miracle. I don't think it was a miracle. I think we just underestimated you... Especially me. Hey, speaking of college, if you get into one of those big places and it's more than the G.I. Bill pays for, I'll help you out. Thanks. Of course, that's just between you and me. Why? I don't want people getting wrong notions. About what? That I'm loaded. Are you loaded? Don't be ridiculous. That doesn't answer my question. The question's ridiculous. That's still no answer. No, I am not loaded. How much do you have? What? How much money do you have? What is this, your idea of a joke? I don't want to take any money from you if you can't afford it. I can afford it. Some places I applied at are expensive. I can afford it. You must be loaded. I am not loaded! You have a summer home, a car. Now you're telling me you can afford any school in the country. You must be fairly loaded. If I hear that word once more, I'll march out the door. You haven't changed a bit. A I really had you going. Yeah. Some joke. Say, pop. What is it? How much do you have? Enough's enough, now! And I think we better change the subject. How did you meet mother? You said change the subject. You know all about that. Just that you picked her up on a subway. It wasn't like that. Now you see, I don't know all about it. "Pick her up" makes it sound cheap. I'm sorry. The first time I spoke to her was on the subway, but there's more to it. Tell me. Why? I might become a writer and want to do a story about it someday. A writer? Maybe... The first I heard about that. Me, too. Must be the beer. One evening, I happened to be leaving same time she did. Turned out we took the same subway. To make a long story short, I got the seat next to her, and we started talking. That's it? That's it. Sounds like an ordinary pickup to me. Well, it wasn't. I left some things out. Such as? I don't remember. That was 25 years ago. I heard you followed her for a month before you got nerve enough to speak. I thought you didn't know the story? To convince her your intentions were honorable, you asked to call at her home. True or false? True. And you'll never believe how nervous I was. And she didn't make it any easier. Pretended the whole thing was a complete surprise. Bernhardt couldn't have done it nicer. Or looked nicer. She was all in blue... blue dress, blue hat, blue shoes. Everything blue. Light blue. And dignified. One look at her, and you knew she was a lady. That's what my family called her... "the lady." To their minds, it was an insult. Hey, not so fast. And keep your eyes on the road. Anybody home? Still at her mother's. I better put these in water. Stand another beer? Sure. Maybe we shouldn't. Why? Your mother blames me for your getting sick last night. Says I encourage you to drink too much. It wasn't what I drank. It was the excitement. That's what I told her. I'll open two more. O.k. Her father used to send her roses every birthday... a dozen red ones. Never missed, even at the end. Tell her they were your idea. Tell her the roses were your idea. Why? She'd get a kick out of it. All right? All right, if you like. Here you go. You call it this time. To the two nicest fellas in the house. I'll buy that. Well, join the party. How was the lake? Still there. I finally got the lowdown on how you and pop first met. He asked me. His version is a little different than yours. What do you mean? Well, he says you chased him. That'll be the day. Says you did everything but stand on your head to attract his attention. How about a beer? No, thanks. Come on. Be a sport. Just a glass. That-a girl. What did he tell you? He said that you were dressed in blue... And that nobody ever looked nicer. I'll bet. Didn't you say that? I'm a stranger here. Did he tell you about how he used his friend Eddie Barnes? Bless us and save us. Every night, they'd get on the subway, stand right in front of me, and have a loud conversation about how well they were doing in business. It wasn't every night. Poor Eddie. Went an hour out of his way. That's what I call a friend. Best I ever had. Well, here you go. Here's your beer. Where did they come from? Pop got them. For you. You did? Yeah. They're beautiful. Thank you. You're welcome. What made you think of it? We just happened to pass a place. I know you like them. I haven't had red roses since papa died. I'm going to cry. You don't bring them flowers, they cry. You do, they cry. I'm sorry. What's to be sorry? Here. Here's what you need. Maybe so. To happy days. To happy days. Happy days. They're just beautiful. Speaking of Eddie Barnes, god rest his soul, it reminds me of the time he took us to that place in Connecticut. Big, fat red-headed dame ran it. Mrs. Hanlon. Yeah. "My friends all call me Daisy." I dubbed her the will Rogers of Connecticut. She never met a man she didn't like. Remember the night you, Eddie, and a couple of others picked her up, bed and all, and left her sleeping in the middle of the baseball field? We went to play in the morning, she was still there. What did you do? Any ball hitting her on the fly was a ground-rule double. We had a lot of fun at that place. I wonder if it's still there. Let's take a ride someday and see. All right. Where you going? I have to cook supper. Forget it. We're eating out. Where would you like to go, champ? Maybe he has a date. Well bring her along. I don't have a date. I thought you'd be seeing that Davis girl. It's finished. She was a nice girl. She was a dunce. John. Pop's right. You men are terrible. You're too kind. Come on. Where will we go? You settle it while I see a man about a dog. Had a nice time today. So did I. We talked about things... Really talked. The way Eddie and I used to. The hell with eating around here. Let's go downtown. You are in a good mood. Because I want to go downtown? That and the roses. Are you going to talk about those roses all night? I just wanted to thank you for them. You already have. You sound as though you're sorry you got them. Don't be ridiculous. Then what are you angry about? I'm just tired of hearing about them. Guy gets some roses... big deal. You're embarrassed. I am not. You did something nice, and you're embarrassed. You don't know what you're talking about. Don't worry. I won't tell anyone. Nettie, please. All right. But I just want to let you know how much I appreciate it. Good. I'm glad. I do. I really do. Do we have reservations? I don't think we can get in anywhere on a Saturday night. What did you decide? We're going downtown. Well, digga, digga, doo! Hit some high spots and some low ones. Sounds like our night to howl. That's what it is. Aroo! You call that a howl? Aroo! Aroo! Where do we go from here? I know just the place. No cover. No minimum. It's called home. No. One more spot we have to hit. Ladies and gentlemen, I see a very dear friend of mine and a faithful patron in our audience this evening. With your encouragement, folks, I'm sure Mr. John Cleary can be persuaded to come up here and do a number that he performed for the crown heads of Europe. No. I don't want to. No, no. Come on, John! All right. Come on. Come on up and sing. Come on up, John. Let's hear it, folks. Good to see you. Good to see you. What do you want me to sing? What do I want him to sing? He only knows one song. You... Folks, I have to apologize for my voice. It's small and terribly nauseating. Herb, anytime you're ready. So that is your new Sunday bonnet Well, sue, it's becoming to you With those wonderful things you have on it You'll make them so jealous, dear sue But somehow it sets me to dreaming On the day we first met long ago And I see you once more In the bonnet you wore When I nicknamed you sunbonnet sue Sunbonnet sue, sunbonnet sue Sunshine and roses ran second to you You looked so nice... He never looks happier than when he has an audience. ...Under your sunbonnet blue Is that my fault? It was only a kind... I would have gone along with anything he wanted to do. ...Tasted much nicer than pie And the first thing I knew I was dead stuck... Pardon me. ...On you When I was a kid so high That's it, folks. Let's hear it. John, that was great! Great! Didn't I tell you? And now, folks, the time has come to get down to some real serious drinking. Where did she go? Ladies room. How was I? Great. Well, for crying out loud. Where the hell have you been? I shouldn't even talk to you. Two months, not a peep. This is my son. How do you do? Hello. I got to go. People waiting. Nice meeting you. Bye. Some stupid dame I used to see in here. Friend of Ruskin's. I would have introduced you, but I couldn't remember her name. No need to explain. Explain what? Pop, look. What are you talking about? Forget it. What happened to our party? It needs watering. Waiter! And make them doubles. It's a long way to tipperary To the sweetest girl I know Good-bye, piccadilly Hello, Leicester square It's a long, long way to tipperary And a lot of guys made cracks, too. Especially guys like Clayton and Harper, who waited to be drafted and then wangled safe jobs at governor's island and the Navy yard. I fixed their wagons. I sent the army flying one way and the Navy the other. That was the last about slacking I heard from them. Still it bothers me, though. Missing out on the whole thing. I'd like to have a nickel for every time I climbed these stairs. And when it's twelve o'clock We climb the stairs We never knock You'll wake the leaveys. Nothing could wake the leaveys. I can't find my keys. I can't find the door. Here, I'll do it. Where would you be if you were my keys? Did you ever see such pretty hair? Please let me open this door. Home to the wife and mother. Someday, we're going to break our necks because you refuse to leave a light on. By the light By the light Of the silvery moon I want to croon To my honey I'll croon That's just enough. Whatever you say, antoinette. I say to bed. The shank of the evening. John. Whoops. You can't beat a law degree. Springboard to anything. So they say. Anyone can become a lawyer. How many people become writers? That's my point. You should be proud to have a son who wants to try something different. Did I say I wasn't proud of him? Abracadabra ca deedra slideherin. The fellow in the red jacket who leads the horses to the post at Jamaica always says that when they reach the starting gate... abracadabra ca deedra slideherin. As long as you can say it, you're not drunk. Abracadabra... Ca deedra slideherin. Zebra slideherin. Not zebra... deedra. Abracadabra ca deedra slideherin. Abracadabra ca deedra slideherin. Very good. Faster. Abracadabra... much faster. Abracadabra ca deedra slideherin Much faster. Abracadabra ca deedra slideherin Have you both lost your minds? Nothing wrong with us a nightcap wouldn't cure. I'll nightcap you. I can't bear to hear married people fight. We ought to go dancing more. Now I know you're drunk. Who was it used to call us the four mortons? Harold Bowen. I wish we were. Remember the first dance I took you to? Of course. I'll bet you don't. Of course I do. Where was it, then? The crystal terrace. And what was the first song? It's too late for quiz games. I have this magical feeling about vaudeville. No matter how cheap or tinny the show is, when the houselights come down, the band starts up... I could cry. Pretty baby. That was the first song we ever danced to. A blond guy crooned it. Through a gold megaphone. Hey, you do remember. Of course. "I've got snew in my blood." "What's snew?" "Nothing. What's snew with you?" He's playing the palace. "Take off the coat. Take off. Take off. Take off the coat." the coat is off Will you please go to bed? In closing we should like to do a dance made famous by the inimitable pat Rooney. Maestro, if you please. John, Timmy, mamma expects us at 12:00. We're running a bit long. No dance tonight, folks. My mother thanks you. My father thanks you. My sister thanks you, and I thank you. Good night. Good night. Good night. Good night. Good night, Mrs. Cleary, whoever you are. Good night, dear. It's a tough house, but I warmed them up for you. Well, thanks. Don't look now but your leg's broken. The show must go on. Plucky lad. Honored to share the bill with you, sir. Likewise. Good night, champ. Sure you don't want a bromo? Abracadabra ca deedra slideherin. See you in the morning. With the help of god. Abracadabra ca deedra slideherin. Home two days, and both nights to bed like that. He's entitled. You should hear what he's been through. They overran a concentration camp. I don't want to hear about it now. You're right. That's no way to end a happy evening. I think we have some aspirin in the kitchen. You never said anything before about a headache. I don't have a headache. Then what? I read that if you put aspirin in cut flowers, they keep longer. I wonder what made you get them. I don't know. There must have been some reason. I just thought it would be nice to do. It was. I like your dress. You've seen it before. But it looks different. Everything about you looks different. What mass are you going to? Ten o'clock. I better set the alarm. Nettie. I had a good time tonight. So did I. Did you really? Or were you just putting it on for his sake? No. I really did. So did I. I'll set the alarm for 9:15. Now that he's back, we'll have lots of good times. What's wrong between you and I has nothing to do with him. I didn't say it did. We have to solve our own problems. Of course. They can't be solved in one night. I know. One nice evening doesn't make everything different. Did I say it did? I guess you don't understand. I'd forgotten how nice you smell. You'll spoil everything. I want things right between us. You think this is going to make them right? We have to start someplace. Start? That's not my idea of a start. Nettie, I want you. I want you like I never wanted anything in my life. Stop! Please. You're drunk. You think I could ask again if I wasn't? I'm not one of your hotel lobby whores. If you were, I wouldn't have to ask. A couple of drinks, a couple of jokes, and let's jump in bed. Maybe that's my mistake. How do you suppose Ruskin managed without you today? Maybe you don't want to be asked! You've had the drinks! You've had the jokes! Leave me alone!! Stop! Leave me... Stop it! What happened? The roses. I knocked them over. It sounded like a bomb. I'm sorry I woke you. Don't. I'll clean up. You go back to bed. Please. All right. Good night. Good night. Good night, pop. You moved me this afternoon. When you brought the roses, I felt something stir in me I thought was dead forever. And now this. I don't understand. I had nothing to do with the roses. They were his idea. Coffee's weak. Add water. I said weak. It's a waste of time bringing good coffee into this house. I'm thinking of renting the lake house this summer. Business is off. Well, what do you say? About what? Renting the lake house. Timmy will be disappointed. How about you? I'm in favor of it. Of course you are. I wonder why. Morning. Good morning. Morning. Nice of you to join us. My pleasure. This isn't a hotel. We have our meals at certain times. You should have woke me. It's all right. Of course it is. What do you want? Coffee. Just coffee? My stomach's a bit shaky. Two days, two hangovers. Is that what they taught you in the army? Cream, please. Thank you. I'm thinking of renting the lake house. How come? I can use the money. That's all you're going to say? What do you expect me to say? I thought that house meant something to you. Yes, but if you need the money... strangers sleeping in our beds doesn't bother you at all? If it has to be, it has to be. Of course. I forgot. What's a little summer cottage after the earth... shattering things you've been through? Do you have more cream? What do you want more cream for? The coffee's strong. It's weak. It's too strong for me. A few months in the army, they're experts on everything, even coffee. Who said that? When I was your age, I was in the coffee business nine years. When I was 17, they sent me to Brazil for 3 months. I know. I'd never been out of New York before, but I went down and did my job. For Emerson, wasn't it? No uniforms, no uncle Sam to lean on, just myself. All alone in a strange place. That's when you grew the mustache to look older. Who's telling the story? I'm sorry. 35 years in the business. He's going to tell me about coffee. I wasn't telling you anything about anything, pop. For me, it's too strong. It isn't strong! What time is dinner? Mamma expects us at 12:00. I suppose you'll wear your uniform? That's the only thing I have that fits. Are you sure? Maybe you haven't grown as much as you think. Ravioli? And meatballs. G.i. Bills, home loans, discharge bonus, unemployment insurance... you boys did pretty well for yourselves. They did pretty well for us, too. Oh! Say can you see... What's your point, pop? The war is over. I'll buy that. The world doesn't owe anybody a living including veterans. I'll buy that too. Let the Jews support you. What? Wasn't for them, we wouldn't have gotten in. I thought you broke that lousy record. Kikes! John! I-I've changed my mind. I'll have some toast. Don't tell me you've lost your great love for the Jews? Stop it. No, it's all right. Well, nice of you to let me talk in my own house, and me, not even a veteran. Pop, what are you mad about? Who's mad? Anything on the toast? Honey, if you've got it. A man states a few facts, right away he's mad. How about strawberry jam? No. If I get a decent offer, I might sell the lake house. Peach? All right. Hurry up with your breakfast. What for? Mass starts in 20 minutes. You're not even dressed. Mass? Mass. I haven't been to mass in over three years. Bad habits you boys picked up you'll have to get over. Not going to mass isn't a habit I picked up. It's a decision I came to after a lot of thought. What way is that for a catholic to talk? I haven't considered myself a catholic for quite a while. There must be something wrong with my ears. You knew this was coming. Why pretend it's such a shock? Now there's a familiar alliance. So you've outgrown the faith? It doesn't answer my needs. Outgrown your old clothes and outgrown the faith. Pop, will you listen to me, please? Millions have believed, since the beginning of time but it's not good enough for you. It's not a question of good enough. What do you say when people ask what religion you are? Nothing. You say you're nothing. Yes. The clearys have been catholics since... since the beginning of time. Now you, a Cleary, tell people you're a nothing? Yes. You're an atheist! John. I'm not an atheist. What are you? I don't know but I'd like a chance to find out. You don't know what you believe in? Do you? Yes. Tell me. Go on... I believe in the father, the son, the holy ghost. God created man in his own image. Pop... if your faith works, I'm glad. Really, I'm very glad. I wish it worked for me, but it doesn't. Do you believe in god? Yes or no? I don't believe in heaven or hell or purgatory. Yes or no! I believe there's something bigger than myself. What you call it or what it is, I don't know. Well, this is a fine how-do-you-do. Yesterday you said he was a man. A man has a right to decide such things for himself. "Good morning, father Riley." "Good morning, Mr. Cleary. I understand your son is home from the service." "Yes, father." "Well, where is he this fine Sunday morning, Mr. Cleary?" "He's home, father." "Is he sick, Mr. Cleary?" "No, father." "Then why isn't he here in church, Mr. Cleary?" "He's become an atheist, father." I am not an atheist. Well, whatever you are, I won't have it. I'm the boss in this house. If you want to live here, do as I say. And I say you're going to church with me this morning. Don't pay any attention to him. Keep out of this! Well? All right, pop. I'll go to mass with you. Be out in a minute. Forget it. What? I said forget it. The lord doesn't want anybody in his house who has to be dragged there. And score another one for your side. It has nothing to do with her. Just wait till you're down on all fours someday. You'll be glad enough to see a priest. We'll meet you at mamma's. I won't be there. She expects us. We all have our disappointments. I said I'd go with you. Pop? Now what was that all about? Why didn't I just go? Why did I have to make an issue? It wasn't your fault. It never is. When he's in one of those moods, there's nothing anyone can do. "The alliance," he called us. That's what we must seem like to him... an alliance. Always two against one, always us against him. Why? If you're through eating, I'll clear the table. Didn't you hear me? Your father's not the only one who got up on the wrong side of bed this morning. I'm not talking about this morning! There's no need to shout. You and him and me and what's been going on around here for 20 years, it's got to stop. What's got to stop? We've got to stop ganging up on him. Is that what we've been doing? You said you never understood him. And never will. Have you ever really tried? Go on. Have you ever really tried seeing things his way? What things? The lake house, for instance. It's the pride and joy of his life, and you're always knocking it. Do you know why? Because he bought it without consulting you. Drove me out to this godforsaken lake, pointed to a bungalow with no heat or hot water and said, "that's where we'll be spending our summers from now on." An hour's ride from New York City isn't exactly godforsaken. It wasn't an hour's ride 20 years ago. The point is would he have gotten it any other way? If he'd said he wanted to buy this cottage on a lake in New Jersey, would you have said yes? I might have. No. Not if it had been a palace with 50 servants. I don't like the country. We'd have spent every summer right here. My idea of a vacation is to travel, see something new. You had a chance to see Brazil. That was different. The fellow who took that job is a millionaire today. And still living in Brazil. Which is not to be compared with the Bronx. So it's my fault we're not millionaires? Who knows? Your mother might have loved Brazil. You violently objected to moving from Yorkville to the Bronx. Why? I hate the Bronx. But you insisted your mother move up here. They tore down her building. She had to move somewhere. Except for summers at the lake, have you ever gone two days without seeing her? Only because of Willis. Where are you going? To get dress. I'm going to church and apologize to him for acting like a fool. You'll be at mamma's for dinner. Only if he'll come with me. You disappointed Willis yesterday. You can't do it again. Yes, I can. How cruel. Not as cruel as your dragging me over there every day when I was little, and when I was bigger and couldn't go every day, concentrating on Sunday... "is it too much to give your crippled cousin one day a week?" When I didn't go on Sunday, I felt guilty. I couldn't enjoy myself anyway. I hate Sunday. I don't think I'll ever get over that, but I'm going to try. How fortunate for the cripples in this world that everyone isn't as selfish as you. Why do you keep calling him a cripple? That is not the worst thing wrong with Willis. It's his mind. He's like a 4-year-old. Can a 4-year-old read a book? He reads after your drilling away at him for 20 years. Does he have any idea what he's reading about? If you and them want to throw your lives away on Willis, go ahead, but don't sacrifice me to the cause. Look, I'm sorry. I didn't mean that. Can I come in? Where are you going? Your mother doesn't expect us till 12:00. Give me a minute to get dressed. I'll go with you. Now, look. This thing is like lead. You've got all your coins in here. You taking your coins? What for? Will you please say something? Thank you for the roses. The lady comes to the gate Dressed in lavender and leather Looking north to the sea She finds the weather fine She hears the steeple bells Ringing through the orchard all the way from town She watches sea gulls fly Silver on the ocean, stitching through the waves The edges of the sky Many people wander up the hills From all around you Making up your memories And thinking they have found you They cover you with veils of wonder As if you were a bride Young men holding violets Are curious to know if you have cried And tell you why and ask you why And hear the way you answer lace around the collars of the blouses of the ladies Flowers from a Spanish friend of the family The embroidery of your life Holds you in and keeps you out But you survive Imprisoned in your bones Behind the isinglass windows of your homes And in the night The iron wheels rolling through the rain Down the hill through the long grass To the sea And in the dark The heart bells ringing with pain Come away alone Even now by the gate With your long hair blowing And the colors of the day that lie along your arms You must barter your life to make sure you are living And the crowd that has come You give them the colors And the bells and the wind and the dream Will there never be A prince who rides along the sea and the mountains? Scattering the sand and the foam Into amethyst fountains Riding up the hills from the beach In the long summer grass Holding the sun in his hands and shattering the isinglass Day and night and day again And people come and go away forever While the shining summer sea Dances in the glass of your mirror While you search the waves for love And your visions for a sign The knot of tears around your throat Is crystallizing into your design And in the night The iron wheels rolling through the rain Down the hills through the long grass To the sea And in the dark The heart bells ringing with pain Come away alone Come away alone I remember sitting here like this that night she went to have John. Why would she just walk out without telling anyone where she was going? I was 6. Without any reason? Dr. Grossburg came at midnight and took her to the hospital. It doesn't make sense. After they left, I started to cry. You did, too. It's not like her. I asked you if you loved her. You nodded. I asked you to say it. You hesitated. I got hysterical. To quiet me, you finally said, "I love her." Maybe she's at Sophie's. No. I called Sophie. It's after 10:00. I called everybody. She's been gone 12 hours. They all said they'd call back if they heard from her. If she's not here by 11:00, I'm calling the police. I wonder what difference it would have made if John lived. I wonder what department you call. I remember you and I going to visit her at the hospital on a Sunday afternoon. I had to wait downstairs. I guess you call missing persons. The first time I ever heard the word "Incubator." In-cu-ba-Tor. As we left the hospital and started down the concourse, we ran into an exotic Spanish-looking woman whom you met on one of your trips to Brazil. She was a dancer, very beautiful. You and she spoke awhile, then you and I went to a movie... Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers in flying down to rio. What are you talking about? I always thought that was a coincidence, meeting a south American woman and then seeing a picture about rio. Was it a coincidence? What? Hey, rio Rio by the sea-o Got to get to rio, and I've got to make time You're drunk. Abracadabra ca deedra slideherin. Fine time you picked for it. A bunch of chorus girls stood on the wings of a silver plane singing that song... hey, rio, rio by the sea-o Got to get to rio, and I've got to make time Ia da dum You were the last one to see her. The police will want to question you. She left the house about 10 A.M., your honor. Didn't say boo, but I assumed she was going to her mother's. Brown hat, brown coat. I went to her mother's, but she wasn't there. They hadn't heard from her. I had two helpings of ravioli and meatballs. Then I came back here to wait. When she didn't call by 3:00, I started to worry. And drink. When she didn't call by 3:00, I started to worry. I tried getting in touch with my father, called all the bars I could think of. "Is Mr. Cleary there? "If he comes in, would you please tell him to call his house?" It was like old times. I told you, I had dinner and went to a movie. "Is Mr. Cleary there?" Well that shows how long I've been away. You never say, "is Mr. Cleary there?" You say, "let me speak to Mr. Cleary" as though you knew he was there. I went to a movie. Did it have a happy ending? Gilda. Rita Hayworth, Glenn Ford. I didn't ask you what it was. Loew's paradise. I didn't ask you what it was. What's the matter with you? Join me. No. And I think you've had enough. Well, that's the first time I've ever seen you refuse a drink. I want you to stop. But you're powerless to stop me. It's a lousy position to be in. I know. That's your last one. Take it, and I leave. "Joy, joy," said Mrs. Malloy. Hello? No. Nothing. I said we haven't heard anything. Well, of course I'm concerned. I don't care how I sound. I'm concerned! Well, if she's not here by 11:00, that's what we'll do. That's a comforting bit of information. It's her mother again. Her mother wanted to let me know how many muggings there's been lately. It's 10:10. The trouble with you is you haven't had enough experience in these matters. Where the devil can she be? I'm an old hand. Never did anything like this before in her life. All those nights I lay in bed waiting for your key to turn in the door, part of me praying you'd come home safe, part of me dreading the sound of that key, because I knew there'd be a fight. I'll give her a few minutes more. All those mornings I woke up sick... Had to miss school. "The boy's delicate," everyone said. "Has a weak constitution." I'll give her till half past. From the day I left this house, I was never sick. Not once. It took me a long time to see the connection. Where could she go? She has no money. Wrong. What? Nothing. You said, "wrong." hey, rio Flying down... I want to know what you meant. She took her coins. Got to get to rio And I've got to make time Hey, rio Rio by the sea-o Gotta get to rio... Why didn't you mention this before? Slipped my mind. $50 in halves, quarters, and dimes? She took them all? A person can go quite a ways on $50. You saw her take them? Yes. Didn't it strike you as peculiar? Everything strikes me as peculiar. There's something you're not telling me. We all have our little secrets. There is something. Take you and your money. What is it? For all I know, we're millionaires. I want to know why she walked out. How much do you have? Answer me! If you don't put that bottle down, I'm leaving. I want an answer. See you around the pool hall. I want an answer! A hell of a way to treat a veteran! I've taken all the crap from you I'm going to. You want an answer? I want a drink. It's a deal? First, the answer. I forget the question. Why did your mother leave this house? Well? We had an argument. About what? I don't remember. Probably had something to do with your drinking. Yes. That's what it was. She said I drank too much. Well, she's right. Yes. Never thought I'd see you and she argue. Neither did I. Didn't say where she was going? Just took the coins and left? That's right. Beats me. Where are you going? To get something to eat. Eat? I didn't have any supper. You were so worried, you couldn't even sit down! I'm just going to have a sandwich. Have a banquet. Why are you mad at me for? You're the one who argued with her. Which absolves you completely. She might jump off a bridge, but your conscience is clear. A person planning to do something like that doesn't take a bunch of change along. She thanked me for the roses. Don't you have any consideration for other people's feelings? You talk about consideration. How could you do it, pop? I looked forward to this morning... to mass and dropping in at Rafferty's afterwards, with you in your uniform. Always the injured party. You'll be the injured party in about two minutes. I already am. Real rough you had it... good food, good clothes, always a roof over your head. Heigh-ho, everybody. It's "count your blessings" time. Well, I'll tell you what rough is. Being so hungry, you begged. Being thrown out on the street with your few sticks of furniture for the neighbors to enjoy. Always hiding from bill collectors and having to leave school at the age of 10 because your father was crippled for life, and it was your job to support the house. You had it rough, all right. The subject was roses. Where I couldn't have gone with your advantages. What I couldn't have been. Why did you tell her about the roses? We were having words, and it slipped out. Words about what? Well? Stop pushing, or I'll tell you. Well, go on. Go on! The humping I'm getting is not worth the humping I'm getting. You pig! I'm warning you. You pig! Bonsoir! Where have you been? I was just about to call the police. Are you going to tell me where you've been? You wouldn't believe me. Of course, I believe you. You don't look well. Appearances are deceiving. I feel terrible. Why wouldn't I believe you? You just wouldn't. Well, tell me and see. I went to the movies. Go on. That's it. You just went to the movies? That's right. Are you trying to tell me you were at a movie for 12 hours? I knew you wouldn't believe me. I believe you. Thank you. What did you see? That means you don't believe me. No, I guess not. I demand to know where you were. I went to the hotel astor, picked up a man, had a few drinks, a few jokes, went up to his room... stop it! I was just getting to the best part. You're making a fool of yourself. Is there anything I could say that you would believe? Say you took a bus downtown, walked around, visited a museum, had dinner, went to radio city, and came home. Took a bus downtown... Walked around... Visited a museum... Had dinner... Went to radio city, and came home. Went to radio city and came home. I'll buy that. If you had any sense, you'd buy it, too. Well, I don't have any sense. I'm just a poor, ignorant slob whose wife has been missing for 12 hours, and I want to know where she's been. What difference does it make? Keep out of this! How? What are you going to tell your mother? Nothing. The poor woman is almost out of her mind. There's a joke there someplace. The least you can do is call her and tell her you're home. She'll want an explanation. When I tell her, she won't believe me any more than you did. I'll believe you when you tell the truth. What is truth? Sorry. I'll tell you this. In all my life, the past 12 hours are the only real freedom I've ever known. Did you enjoy it? Every moment. Why did you come back? I'm a coward. Will somebody tell me what's going on? You heard the question. The gentleman in the balcony... the bearded... I'm sorry, folks. I'm about to be ill. He wouldn't let me hold his head. What happened to your coins? I spent them. How? I took a bus downtown, walked around, visited a museum... if it wasn't for his drinking, none of this would have happened. Why do you say that? If he didn't drink, you and he wouldn't have argued. Well, isn't that why you left... you had an argument about his drinking? We had an argument, but it wasn't about drinking. What was it about? You, mostly. Go on. He thinks I don't give you enough credit. Feels you're quite a guy. Said we have to stop ganging up on you. I couldn't sleep. Neither could I. I think you've decided to leave us. Yes. When? It's not a sudden decision. When are you leaving? In the morning. This fellow I went to high school with has a flat on 22nd street. His roommate just got married, so he's looking for a replacement. I figured... Hey! Hey! I'll give you a penny for them. An apple core. What? An apple core. I was due to start working for a law firm... passed all the interviews and had been notified to report for work the following Monday. On Sunday, my sister and I were walking in the park when a blond boy... Who had a crush on me but was too bashful to speak, demonstrated his affection by throwing an apple core. Struck me here. When I woke up Monday morning, I had the most beautiful black eye you ever saw. Too embarrassed to start a new job looking like that. I called in sick. They called back to say the position had been filled by someone else. The next job I found was the one that brought your father and I together. But you had others to choose from. Yes. All gentle, considerate men. All very much like my father. One of them was a baker from Paterson, New Jersey, that we always joke about. The fellow who brought a hatbox full of pastries whenever he called on you? Yes. What a sweet man. How he begged me to marry. What was it that drew you to pop? I think it was his energy... a certain wildness. He was not like my father at all. I was attracted, and I was afraid. I've always been a little afraid of him. And then he was clearly a young man who was going places. 24 when I met him, and making well over 100 a week... great money in those days... and his prospects were unlimited. Money was never plentiful in our house. We weren't poor like his people, you understand. Never without rent or food or... Tickets to the opera or nice clothes... But still, we weren't well-to-do. Yes... I like good things... things that the baker from paterson could never give me, but your father surely would. The way he was going, he would be a millionaire by the time he was 40. That was his dream. 1929 took care of that. He was never quite the same afterwards. But when I met him, he was cock of the walk. Good-looking... Witty young irishman. Everyone liked him. He was immediately at home on a ship, a... a train, in any bar. Strangers thought he was magnificent. And he was, as long as the situation was impersonal. At his best in an impersonal situation. But that doesn't include the family, the home. The baker from Paterson was all tongue-tied outside... But in the home... He would have been beautiful. Go to bed. I'll be down in a little while. When I left this house three years ago, I blamed him for everything that was wrong here. When I came back, I blamed you. Now I suspect no one's to blame... not even me. Good night. Good night. You won't speak to him. I can't. You're the one who'll miss him most. With me it's different. I've got my business. I envy you. Just ask him to wait a couple of days. He has to leave sometime. But not now... not like this. 22nd street isn't the end of the world. If he leaves this house today, I don't want to see him ever again. If you say that to him, make it clear you're speaking for yourself. Home two days and gone again. The neighbors will have a field day. I'm going in to call him now. I want to see him alone. If you're wise, you won't start a row. I want to see him alone. Your mother tells me you're moving out. I'd like to know why. I demand to know why. Would you be so good as to tell me why? Why, damn it? Good morning. Good morning. Mother said you wanted to see me. Did you sleep well? Yes. Good. You wanted to see me? Mother says you're leaving. Yes. That's rather sudden, isn't it? No, not really. Do you mind telling me why? I just think it's best. For who? Everyone. Crap! No, wait a minute. I didn't mean that. The fact is, I don't blame you for wanting to leave. I had no business hitting you. That's not why I'm going. Any way I can undo last night, I would. It's not a question of last night. If I had it to do over again, I'd cut my arm off. Pop, listen... I don't know what gets into me sometimes. Pop, I'm not leaving because of what happened last night. I've always intended to leave. You never mentioned it. I planned to stay a couple of weeks, then go. Why two days instead of two weeks? I know now if I stay two weeks, I'll never leave. What I said yesterday about me being the boss in the house, I was just letting off steam. It's not that. As far as I'm concerned, you're a man. You can come and go as you please, do as you please, and that goes for religion, drinking... anything. How can I make you understand? Even girls. Sure, I know how it is to be your age. Just give me a little advance notice, I'll see to it you have the house to yourself anytime you want. For Christ's sake! What kind of language is that? I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. Talk any way you want. I don't know what to say to you. What I said about the Jews, I was just trying to get a rise out of you. I know. The time those bums from St. Edward's jumped the "I cash clothesman," I was the one who saved him. Whole crowd of people standing around, I was the only one who did anything. Do you think I could forget that? Stay another week? Just a week? I can't. You any idea of how your mother looked forward to your coming home? Yes. How can you do it? We're going around in circles. What about the lake house? What do you mean? Without you, what's the good of it? I'll spend time there. I thought we'd have a real summer together. You're making this a lot tougher than it has to be. You expect me to say nothing, like her? Are you through? I know what the trouble is. You know what the trouble is? You're like me... stubborn. All the clearys are stubborn. Rather die than admit they made a mistake. Is that a fact, yes or no? I don't know. Here's one donkey who's seen the light. I've been wrong in my dealings with you, and I admit it. Pop... those days are gone forever. And I'll prove it. You know how much money I have? I don't want to know! $14,357, plus a bit more in stocks. Admit you made a mistake. Admit you don't want to leave. We'll forget the whole thing. I don't want to leave. There. You see? But I'm leaving. Then go, and good riddance! The sooner the better! Listen to me! There was a dream I used to have about you and I. It was always the same. I'd be told that you were dead, and I would run crying into the street. Someone would stop me and ask, "why are you crying?" I would say, "because my father is dead..." And he never said he loved me." I only tried to make you stay for her sake. I had that dream again last night. I was thinking about it this morning when something occurred to me I never thought of before. She's the one who'll miss you. It's true. You never said you loved me... But it's also true that I never said those words to you. I don't know what you're talking about. I say them now. I don't know what you're talking about. I love you, pop. I love you. What I said about the money, that's strictly between us. Ready for breakfast? Sit down. Your bags are packed and ready to go. I've changed my mind. What? I've changed my mind. I'm going to stay a few more days. I'm afraid that's out of the question. When you said you were going, I called the painters. They'll be coming in tomorrow to do your room. Well, you know how hard it is to get the painters. It'll be months before they're free again. Then I guess I'd better leave as scheduled. I think so. Don't you? Yes. I don't know why I bother bringing good coffee into this house. If it isn't too weak, it's too strong. If it isn't too strong, it's too cold. |
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