|
Tikhiye stranitsy (Whispering Pages) (1994)
Young man!
- Eh, wait, wait! - What do you want? Money. I'm hungry. I have no money... ...and I'm hungry too. - You're lying. - No. Understand, me too... I can well see you're lying. You're not hungry. You're refusing. - No, no. - That's not good. - You are an avid man. - No, no. I just wanted to ask about the old woman that was killed... ...over there, in flat number 40. There was blood, a whole puddle. - What do you want? - Nothing. Who is he? - Certainly a spy. - I'm not a spy. What do you want? I just wanted to know about the old woman. - Did you go to her flat? - I didn't go anywhere. I just wanted something to eat. I'm hungry. - Let me! Let me go! - He's light, quite light! Light as a feather! To the right, more to the right! Excuse me. I've been sent to find you. But I wasn't looking for you. I was simply walking and thinking, and I heard your voice. We're asking you to come to the cemetery to assist the ceremony for the defunct. Why are you so strangely silent? Won't you come? Aren't you listening to me? Good morning. I will come, I'll certainly come! Then please, have a seat. I'm silent because your voice is so weak and quiet that it's a pleasure to listen to you. Mom, she is the daughter of that poor one who yesterday has been crushed by some horses. You would have thought it was done on purpose. I wanted to ask you this: haven't you been disturbed by the police? No. Only the neighbors are furious. And why? The body is in the flat. It smells old. Why are you looking at my room this way? Mom says it looks like a tomb. How did you find me? I haven't found you. I was thinking of you, and I heard your voice. My voice? Ah yes, your little sister. I gave her my address. Don't you remember me? Certainly not. You have to fill in the application, specifying that you wish to retrieve your things left with the deceased woman. Write down the details, rather briefly, on the administration papers. And correctly. Aren't you cold? You're letting your pen creek. You shouldn't. The pen is no good. Don't press so hard. Be concise. The more things that are in your list the less chance you'll have to reclaim them. It's like for the coachmen. The less you ask of them, the safer - you are. - I don't go traveling by coach. Note down about six objects. Or seven. Not more. How foolish. Oh, my God. Give me at last more paper. Sure, it doesn't fit on one sheet. It's really a pity. May V? That's it. Oh! So many things! And your handwriting is illegible. I'm not stingy about paper, but look. Did you read back what you wrote? - You know... - What more? You could not love... ...my hands, - my laces, my shoes, whatever you want. - God forbid! But I won't allow anyone to make fun of me. Not making fun of you is necessary, but saving you from these imaginary murdered old women. What are you saying? - Your handwriting is awful. - What are you talking about? - What handwriting? - Is it your signature? What signature? Your signature, yours. Yes. Well, that's it. - My Lord! - Are you hurt? There! You have five hours left and if you ever decide to end things in a fantastic way, then... Oh, but why crap right on the stairs? Be kind and leave a note of about 20 lines, not more. Well, good luck! Whats the matter with you? Nothing. Don't be afraid. It's nonsense. Why did I come to torment you? Why? - What happened? - What? What's the matter? Sit. Listen, last time I told you that we wouldn't see each other anymore. I decided to come back today and tell you who killed Lisaveta. That's why I've come. How could you know? Guess! See, I'm a great friend of that man. He didn't intend to kill. It was an accident. Can't you guess? Can you see it? Then, look harder. Look harder! Then? Could I have done it? Did you guess? Won't you leave me? No. What if after all it was me? Then... on your knees! Get down on your knees in the city square. Prostrate yourself and kiss the ground you desecrated. Then tell all the world: I have killed. Then God will give you a new life. Will you go? Will you? Are you talking about jail? Should I go and denounce myself? I will not go. They destroy millions of people, and think to be virtuous. Scoundrels! What should I say to them? I killed but I didn't dare take the money. They would mock me! What an imbecile not to take it! A coward and imbecile. They won't understand. And they don't deserve to understand. I will not go. You should eat something. Then don't go. I have to go. Have you eaten? Is it 11 o'clock already? Yes. Yes, the landlady's clock struck. I could hear it. I will never see you again. Are you cold? No, I'm fine. How thin you are! Your hands look like those of a dead one. I've always been this way. Why are you standing? Sit down. Your father told me all about you. How you went out at six o'clock and came back after nine o'clock. And how Katerina Ivanovna knelt in front of your bed. Katerina Ivanovna is sick with consumption. She'll die soon. No! It would be better if she dies. Not better, not at all better. Do you earn that way every day? No. Your sister will do the same. No! It's impossible. And why is it impossible? God will not allow such a tragedy. He allows far more. God will protect her. God may not even exist! I'm dishonorable I'm a great sinner. You're not a sinner at all. If you're a sinner, then what am I? Sin and shame so easily form an alliance in you with the sacred feelings. Let nobody lie and say that it's easier and more honest to dip one's head into the water and end it all. Let nobody lie. After all, it's nothing. You say you pray to God? What would become of me without God? And does God do something for you? Nothing. Because you're too poor and too insignificant for him. |
|