To Write Love on Her Arms (2012)

1
I wrote this story for Renee because
I wanted to believe in
the happily ever after.
Now, her story isn't unique,
but she is.
The way she speaks the truth.
The way she sees the world.
Once upon a time there was a girl
who loved fairy tales.
Her mind painted the brightest day.
And the darkest night.
But her imagination turned on her
and found her wherever she would hide.
It's okay, it's okay now.
There, there, sweetheart.
Good night.
Now, where are we going to go
in our dreams tonight?
My garden.
Good, good.
Now you draw your beautiful garden.
So she imagined the most beautiful garden.
But even the sun
could not outshine the gray.
When her best friend, Jessie, lost her mom,
she realized not every story has
a happy ending.
So the girl grew up
and left fairy tales behind,
but her music, art and friends
made her feel something...
...even if it wasn't happily ever after.
- Yep?
- Hello?
You left this on the counter last night.
Crazy pills.
No, no, bipolar is not crazy.
What were you doing when the memory part
of my brain was forming?
- I forget.
- You what?
- Take them.
- Okay.
Only in Orlando.
Monday play list. Track four.
One, two, three...
- What?
- Sean sighting.
You ladies coming tonight?
I'm not a lady.
- Thanks.
- See you there.
He smells like leather.
He smells so good.
- No. It starts at midnight?
- So?
- We can be there for 10 minutes.
- It's Halloween.
- Are you kidding me?
- Who cares? My dad will kill me, Renee.
- You know that.
- He will not.
It says dancing on here.
Is it, you know, like sexy dancing?
Or, you know, girls getting
really close and...
We're going.
I don't want to get shanked
in strobe light hell,
so can we, you know,
please get out of here?
- Yeah, let's bounce.
- Let's explore a little bit.
- No.
- Let's explore.
There's nothing over there.
- Renee!
- Jessie!
We need to go home.
No. Where'd she go?
Where did... Are you drunk now?
- It was so beautiful.
- Hey, hey, come on.
You know what, this place sucks
and you're trashed and I wanna go home.
No, no, no. I like how this place is.
- No, well, I don't care, we're going home.
- You're not my mom, Jess!
- Walk your ass home then.
- Why don't you just...
Nice one. Way to go.
Don't leave like that.
Don't worry, I got you.
That was bad.
I'll take you home.
I think these swings are broken.
- Need me to push you?
- I think I do.
You're Superman!
Michael, come on. Dinner time.
- You wanna get higher?
- Shit, Mackey!
And, yes, I do have the shit.
Come on.
Got it? There you go.
Unbelievable.
Damn kids.
You know what I thought about
the first time I got high?
What?
That Adam and Eve must have been cavemen.
What?
Think about it, we grow up
and they tell us about Adam and Eve,
and then we go to school
and they teach us about cavemen.
The whole point of our education
is to get rid of those fairy tales.
I think Adam and Eve is
the truest story I've ever heard.
'Cause things are perfect
and then you ruin them.
Man's gonna cope.
Speaking of which,
word is it's snowing in Daytona.
- At Echo's?
- Yes.
Yes!
- Ready? One, two...
- Go!
Man, leave that poor fish alone.
Children's stories are sick, man.
You got Humpty Dumpty
chillin' on the wall, right?
I wouldn't be on the wall if I was an egg.
That's suicidal, man. You know, for real.
Maybe he was a crackhead.
He was just a dumb egg.
He's not an egg.
- Yeah, he was.
- No.
The nursery rhyme never says he's an egg.
The artist drew him like that.
Whatever, man.
The shit's set. Who's in?
This ain't free.
If you wanna hang out
You gotta take her out
Cocaine
If you wanna get down
Down on the ground
Cocaine
If you got bad news
Gonna kick them blues
Cocaine
When your day is done
And you wanna run
Cocaine
Cocaine!
Yeah, yeah
Don't forget this fact
You can't get it back
Cocaine
Cocaine!
She don't lie, she don't lie, she don't lie...
Everybody!
- Cocaine!
- Cocaine!
- One more time, come on.
- One more time!
She don't lie, she don't lie, she don't lie
Cocaine
Cocaine
Cocaine
Cocaine
No!
No!
Cocaine
No.
Cocaine
No!
Cocaine
She don't lie, she don't lie, she don't lie
Cocaine
She don't lie, baby!
- Yeah!
- Love cocaine!
Hey, where you goin'?
Leave me alone.
I do believe you've got something of mine.
Come on, baby, get in the... Shit.
Cut her off.
Hey.
Hey, it's Renee.
I'm sorry to call so late.
I kind of need you.
- Hey!
- Hi.
Look at this ride.
No, it's not mine. It's my boss's.
- How you doin'? You look so good.
- Good.
You look... You look so different.
Can we go?
Hi, Jess.
Old friends, huh?
So, I'm working
for a big music manager now.
By working for him,
I mean I'm just interning,
you know, for free.
He still hasn't heard me sing yet.
So why were you in Daytona?
Thanks for getting me.
So where are we taking you,
your parents' house?
Or you wanna go to a crack house
or where do you wanna go?
I don't know yet.
It doesn't matter. Wherever it is,
I have to get the car
back to my manager first
and then wherever.
He's your boss.
You have got to be shitting me.
Relax. Okay? This is where my boss is.
It's just... It's kind of crazy that
there's a thing on addiction and stuff.
Wow. What a coincidence.
The way I see it, you kind of owe me one.
All right?
So just think about going in there
and listening to an ex-drug addict
who happens to be my manager.
He's your boss.
My boss slash future manager
is in there talking about
how he used to be a crack whore,
and I would say this is really good timing.
He was a crack whore.
You're calling me a crack whore then?
No, you're not a crack... It's the first...
It's the only drug slang thing I know.
I don't...
What else would I call you?
I mean, I'm not calling you that.
Just, whatever you do,
if you don't wanna go in there,
stay here, I'll be back in 10 minutes.
- Okay?
- Fine.
Excuse me.
Can I have a cigarette, please?
If you have an extra one?
Thank you.
Rough night?
- Rough life.
- Cheers.
So are you addicted to Jesus?
Doing a favor for a friend. You?
Here for the communion wine.
I think it's probably watered down.
I'll see you in there?
- Nope.
- Okay.
Here you go. Not a scratch on it.
You rescue your princess?
Yeah. This is her, I mean, this is Renee.
Pleasure to meet you, I'm McKenna.
Princess Renee.
So, you're Dylan's manager?
Manager? You a rock star now?
Well, if you'll excuse me, rock star.
That's the crack whore?
Don't call him... Between us, all right?
All right, are you gonna come in?
The very first line of
cocaine that I ever took,
the first bump, if you like,
man, I was in love, okay?
It was the love of my life.
Any doubt, any insecurity that I had, gone.
It was bigger than my job,
bigger than my family,
my friends, you know, bigger than me,
and I was a god, remember?
I think rock bottom for me
was a three-day cocaine binge.
I was a mess. I was, you know, bloody nose
and I wasn't sleeping obviously
and I'd run out, I couldn't get anymore.
So I was scrabbling around on the floor
looking for crumbs in the carpet.
And I drank a bottle of vodka
and my heart stopped and I flatlined.
I actually ended up withdrawing on my own
at my parents' house,
I was
lying on my... My parent's couch
and my father just sitting there
holding my hand and...
He had his other hand on my head
the way that...
I don't have any conclusions for you guys.
I'm very much a work in progress myself.
But if you take anything from today,
let it be that addiction is real.
It's bigger than you are.
Shit, shit!
I know a place.
- You want me to make a...
- Yes, yes.
You know, down there
there's a trampoline, somewhere.
Renee Yohe?
So I'll take it. When can I move in?
So do you have drugs in your system?
Yeah. Don't most people who come here?
So what drugs have you taken
in the last 72 hours?
Some uppers, mostly just coke.
That it?
Alcohol.
Ecstasy, but not that much.
What about legal drugs, prescriptions?
You know, for conditions.
I'm here because I have a drug problem.
Not prescription drug problem.
You ever been diagnosed
with any mood disorders?
Miss Yohe?
I don't see how that has
anything to do with anything. Sorry.
How long have you
been off your medication?
Are you gonna let me in or no?
Is my audition finished?
You need a dance
or a little song or something?
No, but I do need to see your arm.
Congratulations, guys.
You brought me to the only rehab
that doesn't take drug addicts.
I didn't make the cut, let's go.
- This isn't a detox center, you know that.
- Yeah, but...
You need to bring her
back when she's clean.
- Are you kidding me?
- Like... Is that a joke?
- Guys...
- Guys, just give me a second.
Conrad, let her detox here.
What's the problem?
We're not equipped, we're not insured
to deal with detoxing.
You can't take drug addicts?
Then who gets rehabbed here?
Bring her back in five days.
She can't sit in a room
without drugs for five days.
That's why we came here.
That's why she's here.
Okay, everybody just needs to calm down.
No, you don't understand how hard it was
to get her here.
Stop! Stop! This is why I can't.
Let's just go, please.
My God. Who does that?
So how do you know this girl?
We just met.
Come on, let her in.
Look, you saw her arm.
She could trigger the other girls. I can't...
I can't risk a fresh cut.
You know the deal, David.
Just bring her back.
Hey.
Where you been,
why haven't I seen you at meetings lately?
You know, business.
Yeah. I know bullshit.
This might be a very good thing
to happen for you, you know.
- Nothing is happening to me.
- Five days, no drugs, no new cuts.
I can't commit to that!
Well, I remember somebody
committing to that for you.
- You're an asshole.
- Bring her back.
I can't do that.
Wow, I haven't seen your parents
in, like, forever.
Yeah, me neither.
- Renee!
- Hey, baby!
Oh, my God, I haven't seen you in forever.
Think you can stay?
April, honey, go inside, please.
Can Renee come in?
Honey, inside, please.
- Hey, Dad.
- Hello, Renee.
I...
I'm gonna go to rehab in a few days.
Good, good, that's really good.
And I just need to...
Actually, I was wondering if I could
stay here for, like, just until I go.
I'm sorry, I can't do that.
Crap.
He's not gonna let her stay.
Can she stay at your place?
No. My dad's not into sleepovers.
Not since my mom died.
She can stay with me.
Yeah, that's a great idea, Dylan.
What's wrong with his?
I don't know.
Just his mother being a raging alcoholic
might get in the way. No big deal.
Dad, I literally don't have anywhere else
I can go.
I'm sorry. I promised myself
it wasn't going to happen again, okay?
And the last time you stayed here,
- it was your... Please just listen to me.
- I know... No, don't...
It was your sister who found your blood.
Okay, I am aware of that.
It's not going to happen ever again.
You don't understand, Dad.
If you don't let me stay here...
- No, I do understand.
- ...I have nowhere else to go.
Five minutes.
Thank you, thank you very much.
- David?
- Yes?
- Can she stay with you?
- No, she can't.
I can't let it happen to your sister
and I can't...
Dad, you can't!
You have to let me stay here.
- Please.
- No. She's your friend, mate.
But you just stood up in church and said
how important it is for people
to have strong support.
I know what I just did and I am having
a tough time at the moment, Dylan.
- I've got a lot on my...
- Please. I know. So is she!
- You love me so much?
- I would do anything for you, but...
You don't want me to sleep in my room
so I can get better?
- Dylan, please.
- ...go home to something like this.
- Can I just have five seconds to try...
- She trusts you.
- And you have a huge house.
- You have a huge house?
- Well, it's big!
- Fine!
You shut up, and you stop sulking,
and you're all staying at my place.
...one of the things I can't do...
You would not do anything
because you're not letting me sleep
where I need to sleep!
Mr. Yohe, my name's David McKenna.
Do you mind if Renee stays with me
for a couple of days?
She's gonna need to get some things.
Lovely.
You moving out or you moving in?
Not sure yet.
This is fancy.
- Hey, Renee.
- Yep.
In this house
there's no booze and no drugs. Okay?
Just sleep, coffee and cigarettes.
My number one rule, we don't get tired
and we don't get hungry.
Okay.
- You in?
- I'm in.
Let's do it.
Okay, kitchen, my quarters, hot tub,
you lot can park it upstairs,
middle room's my office, no kids allowed.
We clear?
And you got first dibs. You two...
Addiction is a very
complicated relationship.
We've been friends with Renee
for, like, 12 years.
- Trust me, we know.
- Okay, all right.
This is not Renee.
You have to think invasion of
the Body Snatchersor something, okay?
Every single thing in her,
every fiber of her being
wants one thing,
is thinking about one thing,
cares about one thing and it's not you,
and it's not me.
It's drugs, okay?
So what do we do?
What we do is...
Okay, the game plan is distractions,
distractions, distractions. Okay?
Dylan, you're on snack duty, okay?
Take Renee, don't let her out of
your sight. Come straight back.
She'll ask you to go someplace else,
you don't go, you don't deviate,
you come back here.
Half an hour, 30 minutes. All right?
Or I'm coming after you. Jessie?
Jessie, take all the knives and anything
sharp in the house and hide them.
You want me to
hide all the knives in the house?
Did you see her arm?
Look, all the ways you want to punish Renee
for being a shit friend
will pale in comparison to the ways
Renee will punish herself.
Now get on with it.
All right, let's go.
Dylan? Don't forget my Lucky Charms.
Animal crackers! Oh, yes!
I missed you.
Yeah, I mean, why did we stop hanging out
in the first place?
What is this? What are we doing?
We're hanging out.
We used to hang out,
like, every day together
and now you're a completely
different person
doing different things and I don't know...
Different things?
You know what I'm talking about.
- I know what you're talking about.
- You know.
Why did you do that to your arm?
It just looked right.
Well, I like the way you look without it.
'Cause it's not true.
Crap, sorry. I didn't know this was...
No, no, no. I got this. I got this.
Okay.
Whoa, McKenna, whoa!
Jamie!
You nearly gave me a heart attack,
you wanker.
When did we start sounding the alarm?
Today.
And when did we get new friends?
Keeping her safe.
- Obvious enough.
- Renee,
meet Jamie, my sometimes housemate,
who I'm guessing missed his flight.
Jessie. Good night.
Dylan took your room,
so you can bunk with him.
All right! Bunk buddies. See you up there.
This is David McKenna.
Everything's fine, false alarm.
Want some Lucky Charms?
I know this isn't any of my business,
but you all right, Renee?
I'm a coozer.
- A coozer?
- It's coke and booze together.
I made it up, do you like it?
Yeah. I don't think McKenna coozes much.
He's such a quitter.
So what's you're... Who do you...
What's your deal?
I'm actually a lot more
interested in you right now.
I'll bet.
I need a place to detox for a few days
till I go to rehab
and McKenna is donating to my charity.
Nosy.
I didn't mean to be nosy.
I'm just really...
That's really brave.
I'm happy for you.
Why doesn't he have knives?
So what do you do?
I am a rep for a surf company.
McKenna's nice enough to let me crash here
when I'm in town.
- You're like a traveling salesman?
- Yeah.
Legit job.
Office. Grown-up stuff.
But what I really wanna do is write.
You like Paper Route?
They're playing at
the Florida Music Fest tomorrow.
Yeah. We should go.
You think the warden will let you out?
I will dig my way out.
Right on.
So you out tomorrow morning or...
Actually the day after,
if that's okay with you.
Yeah, the more the merrier.
All right, thank you.
No problem.
Appreciate it.
And congratulations on
your new life, Renee.
- Good night.
- Bye!
Pretty good.
How are you feeling?
Like my soul got kicked in the nuts.
Good.
Well, not good that you feel
like your soul's been kicked in the balls,
but it's good you're being honest.
Secrets make you sick.
I like that, McKenna.
- Remember it.
- Yes, sir.
Thank you
for all of this.
Somebody did it for me,
you'll do it for someone else.
All right, thanks for the sandwich.
Sleep tight.
This is slave labor.
I prefer the term internship.
It's all gonna be back next week.
So will you. It's a test of wills, mate.
- Hey.
- There she is!
You all right, sleeping beauty?
You have an extra one of those...
Thank you.
Hey, boss?
I have three...
No, I have four questions for you.
- I'll answer two. Maybe.
- Okay.
One, why don't you have any furniture?
Two, where'd you get your tattoo,
three, how come you left England,
and four, I'll ask you later.
One, I just haven't found
the right sofa yet,
I wish people would stop pressuring me,
and two, I got that bad boy in prison.
Prison? What did you do?
Only answering two questions.
- Hey! Right on.
- Hey, Jamie!
Looking great, guys.
So what are you doing
your last night in Orlando?
I was thinking Florida Music Fest.
I mean, your band's playing, right?
We'll all go together.
You have bands? McKenna, I wanna go.
One band, and, no, you can't go,
you're staying with the babysitters.
I thought she needed distractions.
Yeah, if there's music,
I'm not thinking about drugs.
No, there's no drugs at a music festival.
It's a great idea.
Exactly. I don't have extra tickets anyway,
so it's settled.
Turns out Hurley's sponsoring the event.
Made a call, got us VIP treatment
and Paper Route's playing.
And we'll be there
to support your band, Between the Trees.
Why thank you, Jamie.
What would you say if I told you
that I'm not giving up?
However long it takes
It's clear that things have changed
Since when we started
But we can't just walk away, babe
So I am telling you that
I know things aren't quite
like what they used to be
Different faces,
different places
I needed this. Thank you.
You're welcome.
Boys, nice one, well done, more of
the same please. That was the bollocks.
So when are we gonna meet Stevo?
Just let me handle the business.
You're going to meet him
right after the second set.
Go make daddy proud.
Where have I landed
I don't quite remember
I fell to pieces
one night in December
The memories of losing you
You're like a ghost
Tracing where I said to you
I wish you would listen
- Lift me up!
- Oh, no!
Yes, Dylan, lift me up!
Lift me up! Come on!
Please, you guys, if anyone
is doing drugs up there,
I will come right down immediately.
They might be.
No, no, no. McKenna will kill me.
- Please, please, Dylan.
- Just watch from right here.
Come on, one...
Be right back?
Girl scout's honor. One, two, three!
Looking for love like
a bride looks for dresses
The memories of losing you
You're like a ghost
Tracing where I said to you
I wish you would listen
I wish you would listen
I wish you would listen
To get through it
I wish you would listen
McKenna?
- Stevo.
- What's up?
- How you doing?
- Good.
- Safe trip?
- All good.
Okay, good. Anyway, listen,
are you a Between the Trees fan yet?
- We'll see.
- Okay.
When can I meet the band?
I'll introduce you right after the second set.
Listen, would you excuse me a minute, yeah?
Hey, where's Renee?
She's up there, we just put her up there.
Tell me you are joking.
You put her up there?
We're at a music festival!
It's fine, McKenna!
Well, she's not there now!
I told you this was a bad idea!
Okay, Jessie, you go that way,
you get back in the crowd
and you come with me!
- Yohe! Yohe!
- Hey!
Where you been?
What happened to you back in Daytona?
What, you get saved or kidnapped
or something?
A little bit of both.
I lost my group I came with.
Why don't you get in,
I'll take you around the
front by the stage.
Hey, wanna go downtown?
I got some mad snow not far from here.
No, no more snow. I'm done with that.
Two days sober, man, three days to rehab.
How Hollywood of you.
Come on, you sure you don't want to go out
with a bang?
No. Take me back.
All right.
- Renee!
- Hey, hey, hold on.
Hey, all right. Thanks.
Sure thing. Stay safe.
Yeah, you too. Hey.
Is that one of your boyfriends?
What's your problem? No, no.
What's your problem?
Did you just go use with that guy?
- Did I just use with that guy?
- Did you just go use with that guy?
No, I didn't go use with that guy, Jess!
Just go home, dude, if you don't want
to be here, you don't have to be here.
I'm sure you'd love that, wouldn't you,
so you could have a house full of men
all to yourself, right?
What are you talking about?
We used to be a family.
- Do you know how much that means to me?
- Yes.
You gave up everything for some prick
at a bullshit rave.
Whoa, you don't know
what happened with Sean. Okay?
I don't care what happened, Renee,
'cause it's not about Sean,
it's about you giving up everything
for the slightest bit of attention.
Listen to me right now.
I will tell you everything right now. He...
Stop right there. Just stop right there.
I don't care and I don't want to hear it.
I'm so sick of
hearing your stories and your sadness
and seeing your pity scars
all over your body.
I'm so sick of it. I'm done.
I want to see what I dream
I want the inconvenience
I hope you see that
when you fall in love...
Stevo, no, no, Stevo's fine,
yeah, yeah, yeah,
he loved it.
Yeah, he really did, yeah.
Yeah, something came up.
Just let me deal with the
contracts, all right?
No, no, no, no, I'll be there. Yeah.
No, I wouldn't miss it for the world.
Yeah, okay.
You going out for a smoke?
Don't you have a plane to catch?
It's delayed till we get you to rehab.
When I was a little kid I used to say that
planes were like these big friendly giants
and if I had, like, a bad dream, bad idea,
a plane would just fly them away.
Sounds beautiful.
Just wanna escape all this shit.
Yeah, you know, you remind me
of my friend, Zeke.
Zeke.
He'd say the worst part of his day
was the paddling back to shore.
- Surfing?
- Yeah. He was a surf buddy.
He died two months ago.
Took his own life. Now, I don't know
if I could have said something.
But I wanna be the guy
who can say the right thing.
You know?
I think people might need more than words.
Maybe.
- You all right?
- Yeah, I think I... I think.
Is she okay? Is she all right?
- No.
- Need some water?
- A blanket?
- She needs a bed.
Here's a bucket, in case you need to...
- I'm so cold.
- It's all right, I got it.
My dad put this by my bed
every time I was ill.
Let me get you some water.
Is this normal?
This is the worst part.
Great.
I'll be next door, okay?
Yeah, hang in there.
I missed you.
You wanna go for a ride?
No.
Am I ever going to be okay?
Why did you make me like this?
No, ma'am. What are you thinking...
She's hurting herself.
She's cutting herself,
and I don't understand.
What is wrong with her?
Those pills are nothing. I don't want her...
I don't want her taking all those pills,
do you understand?
Why does she keep doing these things?
It doesn't help to ask why.
Why can't we help it? Why is she doing
these things? She's hurting herself.
What did I say?
All business comes and goes through me.
No, that's... No, I...
No, you... No, you...
Will you let me speak? Please?
You really wanna have this conversation?
Three months ago you were performing
for a bunch of drunks in a bloody toilet.
Don't you ever speak to me like that!
Shit!
Patio.
It's nice, huh?
- Bombay Bitches.
- What?
Your third question.
The reason I left England.
For a band.
I got stuck here in Orlando for a few more.
Bombay Bitches.
Yeah, yeah, all right, I do know it,
you can stop, thank you.
They were also the reason
I hit rock bottom fairly predictably.
So is that how you did it?
You started over somewhere new and...
No. That didn't work for me.
The problem was always me.
Wherever I went, there I was.
A friend once said to me
that I should never be left unattended
because what I get back to is me.
And me is the problem.
You need other people.
What's today's date?
The 15th.
- I have to go somewhere. Please.
- Not a chance.
Please, please.
I'll take Dylan. It'll be fine.
Please. It's important.
Take Dylan. One hour.
I'm trusting you, all right?
Thank you.
Your dad said you were here.
I'm really sorry we forgot.
I miss you.
It was like you died too, you know.
I didn't.
I miss her so much and
I can't lose you, too.
Why did you stop calling us?
It was just overnight,
you just stopped calling us.
I just...
Something happened
and I just didn't want to talk about it.
I wanted to be alone and it just got...
It got out of hand.
What are you talking about?
Halloween party.
Sean pulled over in a parking lot
so I could throw up.
And he raped me.
I mean, we had no idea.
I'm so sorry.
I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
I'm sorry about everything I said at
the concert. I'm sorry about everything.
I'm sorry.
Will you please come back to McKenna's?
I'll come back. I promise.
All right, everyone, pay attention.
She is never alone. Got it?
And no crowd surfing
in the record shop, please,
thank you very much, if you don't mind.
Daja Grace.
- I think it's Dasia, isn't it?
- Man.
- What?
- Look.
- You don't need that.
- I know.
It's just the idea of eternal sobriety
scares me very much.
- One day at a time.
- Right.
Yeah.
At least that's what my mom said
right before she relapsed.
Good.
Now that is impressive.
- Coffee?
- Thank you.
- That's cool.
- Yeah.
The metalmark is the most
beautiful butterfly.
And it's the most fragile,
as it only lives a week.
Isn't that sad?
I wanted to ask you something.
- Yeah?
- Don't get angry. It's kind of crazy.
I love crazy. I'm insane.
I want to write. I want to tell your story.
- You want to write my story?
- Yeah, I do.
It's powerful and because nobody says...
Nobody talks about all the things
that happen to you.
- You know?
- I know.
And I just...
I think it will help somebody.
- Oh, God.
- You think it'll help...
- I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
- No, no, no, no, no!
Jamie, I'm just...
You think it could help people, like...
Yeah, I do.
Okay, then do it. Sure.
Thanks for coming out to open mic night.
- First up is Dylan Landers. Dylan?
- What?
Shit! Did you hear that?
Get your stuff. We're going to the front.
Hello.
My name is Dylan.
Sorry.
So this is a...
I've never really done this before.
This is my first time.
So today, tomorrow, actually,
my best friend, Renee, is going to rehab.
For drugs. And...
Not, like, to get drugs, but...
'Cause they don't...
I don't think they have drugs there.
So I want to sing a song for her.
It's sort of like...
It's kind of like a prayer in reverse.
No, it's like, it's good. Here it goes.
Come up to meet you
Tell you I'm sorry
You don't know how lovely you are
I had to find you
Tell you I need you
Tell you I set you apart
Tell me your secrets
Ask me your questions
Oh, let's go back to the start
Nobody said it was easy
It's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said
It would be this hard
I'm going back to the start
- Hey.
- Hey, hey, hey.
That was a fun day, right?
Yeah, fun, fun.
Flying out?
Yeah, I'm taking
the big friendly giant tomorrow.
No, don't steal my line.
I have a little... I have a little...
I just wanna give you something.
- But it's weird.
- All right.
Okay. Ready?
Here, hold it like...
Okay.
I don't trust myself with it and I...
I would like to throw it away.
But maybe you can do that instead.
- Okay.
- Thank you.
- Let's take a ride.
- Okay.
Come on.
Can you believe
he still drives the same stupid truck?
Sean is a janitor now. He's a real winner.
- Take the first one?
- No.
Take it.
Come on, we're not doing this.
- Take it!
- This is stupid. No.
- I'm not doing this. I wanna go back, please.
- Hey, Renee.
You need this. You don't even understand
how bad you need this.
I don't need this. I don't need this.
I don't need this.
He took you from us.
He took you from everything.
Stop!
Please, I can't. I can't right now.
Please. Just forget it.
It was a long time ago.
You don't have to...
Thank you.
I've got something for you.
I got this at three months sober.
It's your watch thingy.
Here, look.
No way.
"God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
"the courage to change the things I can
and the wisdom to know the difference."
You have to wind it every day.
It's a little reminder
to take it one day at a time.
You're like my fairy godmother.
Did you just call me a fairy?
Yes.
Don't say it. Don't say a word.
- Love you.
- Love you too.
- How you doing?
- Better.
Good. Welcome back.
In our local hero report,
one young man is making a difference
in the lives of young people in crisis.
Jamie Tworkowski wrote a story
about a local girl, Renee Yohe,
who was suffering from addiction,
depression and bipolar disorder
and got clean with the help of her friends.
He posted her story on Myspace titled
"To Write Love On Her Arms"
and it quickly went viral.
Remembering her scars,
he printed the unusual logo on T-shirts
to raise money for her treatment.
Friends in bands
started to wear our T-shirts.
You know, they were really
generous with their platform.
Then something crazy
and unexpected happened.
Thousands of young adults found the page
and wrote about their own struggles
of depression, addiction and isolation,
and an online community was born
and became a legitimate social movement.
Jamie now runs the nonprofit organization
that is committed to helping others
with similar issues worldwide.
Renee Yohe has become a role model
for many young people
and will be speaking at an event
this Friday in Orlando.
You know, most people are celebrities
before they go into rehab.
Next week no one will care. Don't worry.
Well, if this is McKenna's doing,
I'll skin him alive.
Did you give him this?
No, no. That's a story
he'll have to tell you.
Oh, boy.
Yeah? You ready for this?
I don't know.
Six months is not a long time.
Thanks, Doc.
Hello.
Renee...
Sorry, we didn't know if the surprise
was appropriate or anything.
What's going on?
- It's like so intense.
- I know.
I have a manager now
and we're playing some shows
- and I really want you to come because...
- Shut up. Oh, my God!
Dylan's a pro.
Where's McKenna?
He's taking a break sort
of from everything.
What do you mean?
His band fired him.
- No way.
- Yes.
But he'll be back in a few days.
- He's just sorting things out.
- Okay.
Is it my fault?
- No, no, no.
- 'Cause he was babysitting me?
- No.
- Yeah, it is.
- No. I would seriously tell you...
- Hi.
I'm going to go make out with your dad.
You want some sobriety cake?
- It's so good.
- Is it?
This is my second piece,
but I ate the first one in hiding.
Are you okay?
Yeah.
I'm good. It's just a little weird.
- I know.
- You know what I mean?
'Cause what are we celebrating, that I'm...
It's like, "You're normal, yay, party!"
Well, if you don't want anybody
to be here right now,
- we can get them out.
- Oh, my God, Jess. Jess.
Renee!
Hey!
Hi!
I'm so proud of you.
- Thank you.
- How are you feeling?
- Much better.
- You look amazing.
Thanks for all your notes
and sending me letters and all that stuff.
Of course, of course, of course.
We have so much to catch up on.
- It has been a whirlwind!
- I know.
I want you to come down to the office,
I want you to see everything that
you've created and what's happened.
It's beautiful.
That'd be great, yeah, I'd love to.
Maybe respond to a few e-mails, yeah?
Sounds good.
- Okay?
- Yeah.
Babe, come meet Renee!
Hi.
It's so nice to finally meet you!
Renee, this is Amanda. She's my girlfriend.
She's down from New York
for the show on Friday.
Yeah. Jamie talks about you all the time.
He's so proud of you.
And I can't wait for the event on Friday.
It's going to be amazing.
Are you looking forward to it? Are...
Well, anyway,
it's nice to finally meet you,
and I can't wait for Friday, and...
And we've got to catch up.
- It's like it happened overnight, you know?
- Yeah, yeah.
We've had this office
for a couple months now.
In this room we put some of the letters
from, you know, our followers.
Hey, Renee.
- Hey.
- Hey, babe.
That's cool.
They write to us, you know.
They just want to have a voice.
Yeah.
Come on in.
These people just want someone to talk to,
someone to hear them.
Yeah.
And they feel safe with you.
So just click on the messages.
- Andvoil.
- Yeah.
- You okay?
- Yeah, yeah.
- Be right across the hall.
- All right.
I can't do life anymore.
I just want to die.
Everything's so messed up.
I don't have friends like you.
Why are you so special?
I'm writing this 'cause
nobody knows about the scars on my chest.
Who am I supposed to tell?
Hi. My...
When I was 12, my dad molested me.
Okay.
It's the only time that I agree.
I know. It was so embarrassing.
You know what,
would you at least put on your robe
before you run for the paper every Tuesday?
- Yes. Yes.
- Yes?
Then the band will play
and I'll introduce you.
And then you speak.
Have you written something up?
- About what?
- Your story.
It's kind of a personal story.
Don't you think?
Hey, guys, would you mind helping me
put the T-shirts in the van?
You got a sec?
What's going on?
What... Why did you write this?
For you.
For me? Really? How... All this is for me?
Yeah.
I'm sitting at the airport
and I can't stop thinking about you.
You and these five days.
I just started writing and writing,
and my heart poured out and it was beautiful.
And it was about you.
So then why didn't you just send it to me?
Because I thought about Zeke,
and I thought about all the people,
all the people
who were in similar circumstances
and I wanted people to know
that recovery is possible.
What if I'm not recovered?
What are you talking about?
Talk to me. This is...
This is me, all right, you know?
Put all this aside.
Do you need to go back to rehab?
No. I'm fine.
Renee, we can pay for it.
I'm fine.
- I just am nervous. Just nervous.
- Yeah.
All right. I'm here if you need me.
- Hey! Hey.
- Hey!
How are you feeling?
I just wanted to see you
and talk about some...
It's a bit of a mess. Just hang on a sec.
I'm just going to clean up.
I've been... Had the... Find some...
So you got fired, huh?
- What's that, sorry?
- You just got fired
and now you have to sell your loft
because of me.
No, no. It's just... It's...
It's too big anyway for me.
I'm just... No, I've got, you know,
irons in the fire...
What's wrong with you?
I'm just excited, you know?
I've got a lot of stuff
going on at the moment.
It's really a busy time for me.
Yeah.
Look what I got.
Your watch.
- And it... Yeah?
- Yeah.
All right.
Well, listen, I'm so sorry I couldn't come,
and, you know, have a chance to...
To come get you out, meet you out of there.
Listen, I'm sick.
So maybe don't catch germs from that.
So what did you want to talk to me about?
What's the trouble?
I wanted to know how you stayed sober
for so... Such a long time.
- You just take it one day at a time, you know?
- Yeah?
Easy, easy does it is what we...
You know, you have to wind this or else...
I told you, you have to wind it.
You forgot to hide a
bottle over there, buddy.
I lost the band.
I'm eating crap. I lost the band.
I'm not doing great, okay?
It's been a tough time.
Okay.
I don't have anybody, okay?
I don't either.
Renee, come on!
Renee!
- Hey! Have you guys seen Renee?
- Hey!
- No.
- No.
I've been trying to get
a hold of her all day.
Why, did something happen?
You know, it's nothing.
She just wasn't herself yesterday.
- Did she say anything?
- No.
I'm going to call her.
I'm sure it's fine. I'm going to call her.
Hey! My truck! What the hell?
You have a kid?
Boy or girl?
- Boy or girl?
- A little girl. A girl.
Oh, God!
Look who it is! Yohe!
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
Check this out, check this out!
This is my new favorite shirt.
I love wearing this thing.
So does that mean that you're...
'Cause you're wearing the shirt,
you're sober 'cause...
Me? No, I mean,
I don't like getting high in your shirt.
So there's some internal conflict going on.
Man. You! You sobriety celebrity you!
Dude, I don't want to talk about this.
Aren't you supposed to be
at that party right now?
I'm the last person who should be
telling anyone how to live their lives.
I was in rehab for six months.
I am exactly the... I'm exactly the same.
The thing that people love about you
and your story is that it's honest.
You're sad. Shit happens.
You're trying, okay?
Even if it's just a little bit.
Where else you got to go tonight?
I wrote this story for Renee because
I wanted to believe in
the happily ever after.
Now, her story isn't unique,
but she is.
The way she speaks the truth.
The way she sees the world.
And I pray that never changes.
Now, Renee was
supposed to be here tonight.
But she couldn't make it.
But in the spirit of Renee,
we should open it up to you out there.
Now, we've got some friends who are
going to be bringing microphones around.
They're going to bring
them down the aisles.
Let's stand up and tell our story.
Go ahead.
The first time I ever thought about suicide
was around the same time
I started pulling my hair.
Two weeks ago,
I did a search for ways to end it
and I found the To Write Love site.
I read Renee's story.
I wasn't used to hearing
other people hurting.
Her story helped me find hope.
Thank you.
Anybody else?
Hi.
Hello.
That was...
Thank you.
I'm not sure what to say,
but my friends are here
and I know they're worried about me.
They think I'm better, and I'm not.
But I think that's okay,
'cause I have them.
Secrets make you sick.
Somebody that I love told me that
and it's true.
'Cause when I finally
asked for help, I got it.
And when my friend asked me for help,
I just...
I didn't give it to him.
I think what this whole thing is about
is what I'm going to go do
right now. So thanks.
Thank you.
Anybody else?
McKenna?
Clever. Clever.
Conrad said I should ask you about that.
My father put me in prison.
Well, selling a shitload of cocaine
put me in prison,
but my father turned me in.
I think he knew
it was the only way I'd get clean.
And I hated him for it, I hated him for it.
And I told him in a letter.
And in return, he sends me this.
I never knew why he didn't drink,
and, well, it turns out,
"Like father, like son."
He died while I was in there.
So "James Terrance McKenna."
So I guess
that's all your questions answered.
I'm sorry.
- It's all right. It was a while ago.
- No.
I'm sorry I left you.
I called Conrad.
You did?
Yep. Asked him if he had
any room at the inn.
I told him I'd prefer to get sober
in an all-girls facility.
We all wake to the human condition.
We wake to mystery and beauty,
but also to tragedy and loss.
Millions of people know
that pain is very real.
We also know that hope is real.
When Renee came to us,
we became her hospital, her church.
Coming alive to meet her needs,
to write love on her arms.
Rescue is possible.
God is still in the business of redemption.
The first step to recovery
is the hardest to take.
But it's worth it.
Life is worth fighting for.
Hi, I'm Jamie Tworkowski,
founder of To Write Love on Her Arms.
Millions of people around the world
struggle with depression, addiction,
self-injury and suicide.
There's a stigma that
if you struggle with these things,
you're not supposed to talk about it.
But I'm here on behalf of people
literally choosing to stay alive
and choosing to believe
that life can change.
If you're struggling, or if there's
someone you're concerned about,
please know you're not alone.
It's okay to be honest
and it's okay to ask for help.
You are living a story, and it's our hope that
you will never give up on that story.
To Write Love on Her
Arms still exists today.
We respond to every single message
that comes in,
and there are more ways than ever
to get involved.
I called you from the hospital
You didn't pick up the phone
I was left alone
with the crazy fishes
Swimmin' in their senseless circle
All of us together
Smashing our faces in the glass
This repetition's definition
could be insanity
But flip a switch
and check the sky as I go
Just gotta keep trying
Had to keep trying
I had said that I'd be better
Told you I'd never fall again
Countless times
and you believed me
But I let you down again
I'm not asking you to answer
I can tell this is the end
So I'm goin' to leave you at the tone
I know that I won't spend
my whole life in a cell
I will keep fighting
and so be righting myself
One foot right in front
of the other as they say
Even when it's dismal
I'm guaranteed change
I had said that I'd be better
Told you I'd never fall again
Countless times
and you believed me
But I let you down again
I'm not asking you to answer
I can tell this is the end
So I'm goin' to leave you at the tone
Goin' to leave you
Got to leave you at the tone
Goin' to leave you
Got to leave you at the tone
Goin' to leave you
Got to leave you at the tone
Goin' to leave you
I had said that I'd be better
I told you I'd never fall again
Countless times
and you believed me
But I let you down again
I'm not asking you to answer
I can tell this is the end
So I'm goin' to leave you at the tone
Goin' to leave you
Got to leave you at the tone
Goin' to leave you
Got to leave you at the tone
Goin' to leave you
Got to leave you at the tone
Goin' to leave you