1
- "Home"?
- Excuse me?
I'm calling from a mobile I found.
I didn't know the owner's name,
so I checked the contacts
and found one called "Home",
so I called you.
- You have my phone?
- Looks that way.
Thank you! That's great.
Where did you find it?
On the terrace at the Garibaldi.
Wow! It's crazy. I looked everywhere.
I don't know how I forgot it.
L can tell you that.
You were arguing with someone.
You hung up abruptly, paid the bill,
and walked off
leaving your phone on the table.
- You were sitting next to me?
- A few tables away.
And you heard?
- I think everyone heard.
- Oh, no.
I'm so ashamed.
I must've seemed half-hysterical.
As you noticed, I'm having
relationship problems with someone...
- Bruno?
- Excuse me?
The relationship problems are with Bruno?
- He's called seven times since you left.
- OK.
He texted too.
- Should I read you his messages?
- No, that's OK. Very kind, thank you.
- But I don't understand...
- Yes?
If you saw me leave without my phone,
why didn't you just give it back to me?
I could've, it's true.
But what would've happened?
I'd have given you your phone,
you'd have said thank you,
and walked off without even seeing me.
Whereas now, when I give it back to you...
HI have your attention.
- Shit! What an idiot!
- Pardon?
My bath is running over.
- Go on, I'll call you back.
- OK.
Shit!
It's everywhere!
- You didn't leave me much time.
- Who didn't?
No, Bruno, that's enough.
We've argued enough for one day.
Diane, it's a mess.
There won't be an agreement.
I told you what I think! I'm tired now.
I'd like to take a bath or go to bed.
To do something else.
t'll go to court.
I won't give in. If you don't agree,
we'll separate. That's it.
We are separated, darling.
I meant professionally.
And stop calling me darling. It's absurd.
Why don't you trust me'?
Try me one time.
I have to go, I have a call.
- Who?
- It's none of your business.
Think it over, we need this...
Bruno, I'm hanging up! Goodbye.
Hello.
- You really irritate me.
- Already?
- We barely know each other.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
I didn't think it was you.
I was talking to...
Bruno?
Yes. He's my ex.
- Has it been long?
- What?
That you've been separated.
Three years.
But I'm not sure anyone's told him.
Why am I telling you this?
I don't know you.
Me neither.
Do you have a name,
or do I keep calling you "Home"?
Home is a pretty name.
Diane. And you?
Alexandre.
Why does Bruno keep chasing after you?
He's not chasing after me. We're partners.
- I see.
- Yeah.
- You have a company?
- A law practice.
- Civil or corporate?
- A bit of both.
- Which do you prefer?
- It depends...
- What exactly are you doing?
- Nothing. Talking to you.
- It's pleasant, isn't it?
- Yes...
But it's kind of...
Kind of weird. You're right.
And I suggest we stop.
Now that we have
a fabulous opportunity...
- An opportunity?
- To have dinner together.
Oh, I see. And who exactly
is it an opportunity for?
For me, I admit.
- What's in it for me?
- A telephone!
But it's my telephone!
But I have it.
You're holding it hostage.
I don't know what to say, because...
I have one principle in life.
- Never have dinner with strangers.
- You're perfectly right.
Especially nowadays.
How about lunch?
A cup of coffee? Ice cream? A crpe?
A merry-go-round ride'?
Come on, I need some help!
You don't give up.
Never. Perseverance is
one of my foremost qualities.
- What about modesty?
- That too.
But I'm not sure it would get me
a yes tonight.
Am I right?
So, Home, what do you say?
Tomorrow, two pm?
I'm busy until three.
Then let's say 3:30.
- Do you know the Monte-Crista Caf?
- Yes.
Perfect. 3:30 at the Monte-Crista.
How will we recognise each other?
To start with, I know who you are.
Right. How silly of me.
And you'll see,
you won't be able to miss me...
- Then I'll see you tomorrow.
- OK.
- Goodbye.
- Goodbye.
UP FOR LOVE
Home?
I'm sorry, there was traffic.
- You OK?
- Yes, great.
It's always a bit strange,
meeting in the flesh.
You talk on the phone
and imagine something,
and it doesn't match.
- No, I didn't imagine
anything in particular. - Hello!
- What will it be today?
- Perrier for me.
- No ice and a lemon wedge.
- That's it.
- Anything else for you?
- No, thanks.
You come here often?
No. But as a rule, people remember me.
You have a pretty smile.
Oops, wrong move.
Before I forget the most important thing...
The battery needs charging.
- What's wrong?
- Nothing.
I'm 16 inches short?
Is it a big deal?
- Not at all.
- No?
- No. It's even... Not a big deal
at all. No. - It's no big deal. No.
It's different.
It's original, perhaps surprising.
But not a big deal.
War's a big deal.
Bad breath is a big deal.
But not that.
I was a bit surprised, I admit.
I understand. Me too, it surprises me.
You weren't expecting
such a small man. It's normal.
And now you need time to take it in.
Yes, people are looking. What can I say?
They wonder what we're doing together,
a gorgeous blonde and a gnome.
But it's simple.
A strong-willed woman sent her ex-husband,
who's a nuisance, packing.
She was upset and forgot her phone.
A man who measures four foot five...
I know, I look taller,
but I'm actually four foot five...
- Sure.
- ... brought her phone back.
What's so extraordinary? Nothing.
Nothing worth
twisting your neck over, right?
- You're right.
- Good.
- What are you doing after?
- After?
After we're done here,
what are you going to do?
I have an appointment with a client nearby.
You know what? You're going
to call them and cancel.
Yes, you are. They'll be surprised,
maybe even annoyed,
but it's not a problem,
you'll make another appointment.
And I'll take you
on an unforgettable experience.
No, I'm serious. It'll change your life.
- I can't do that.
- Yes, you can.
It totally changed my life!
What exactly are you talking about?
- Adrenaline.
- Alexandre!
- Hey, Vanessa! How are you?
- What are you doing here?
I thought you were in New York.
Olivier's still at the Biennial.
He has time to play there for a week.
I work.
Hello.
Sorry. Diane, a friend. Vanessa, a friend.
- Pleased to meet you.
- And you.
- Going to Maurice's birthday on Saturday?
- I'm not sure I can.
- I hope you'll make it. Good to see you.
- Say hi to Olivier.
- OK. He's back tonight. Bye!
- Bye.
Where were we?
The adrenaline-filled experience
you are about to live in exactly...
one hour.
Sebastien, it's Alexandre.
Can I have a plane in one hour?
Two people.
OK, thanks. See you.
It's all settled.
Oh, my God.
We're at 10,000 feet!
10,000 feet! That's almost two miles!
That's right. How do you feel?
- Not well.
- That's only normal.
I want to go home.
You are. But you're taking another route.
No, I don't want to!
Don't worry, I'm used to it.
- Are you sure?
- Yeah.
- It's my second time!
- OK...
What?
That isn't funny!
- Stop this plane!
- OK.
Come on, Home!
- No way, no way!
- Diane.
Diane! Everything will be fine.
- I can't, I can't.
- Diane.
Listen to me.
You're with me. You're safe.
It'll be all right, OK?
At five, we jump.
One...
two... three...
That was...
- I've never felt that before.
- Yeah?
- Look, I have goosebumps!
- I believe you.
Oh, my God, Ijumped out of a plane.
I jumped out of a flying plane!
Thank you, thank you, thank you. I...
- I can't find the words.
- Give me a call when you do.
- I don't have your number.
- It's in your phone. "Alexandre. "
I see. OK.
You leave nothing to chance, do you?
When you like parachuting, it's wiser.
- Hello, sir.
- Hello, Monique.
No...
No...
Luchio, no.
Benji! Call your dog!
Down, boy!
- That dog drives me crazy!
- He loves you to death.
That's the problem.
- You have to talk to her, Dad.
- Why?
Life's been hard on her recently.
Try to understand.
You mean, it's hard on us. It's filthy here.
There's dust everywhere.
She never vacuums.
She lost her husband.
She's sad. It's normal.
- It was five years ago!
- She loved him a lot.
- What do I do with this?
- This?
You can give it to me. I love the colour.
God damn it!
I disagree.
Real estate is like a steamship.
Changes of direction are slow
and it stays on the same trajectory...
Sorry. Yes?
I said no.
Besides, the salary was too low.
- How much?
- Not enough.
- Meaning?
- Not enough!
Is it more than zero?
Because that's what you're earning now.
- I should've said yes?
- No.
Your heart wasn't in it.
The question is, what do you want to do?
I told you. I want to launch my app.
The idea is good. It could work.
But I need investors.
France is so petty.
You need to aim big! You taught me that.
Monique, can we turn the radio down?
What I need is backers. You see?
Guys who are ready to invest money
in talented young guys like me
who have ideas, that's all.
People like Timo Atanen.
- Who?
- The Finnish guy who started "Sparkle".
Oh, yeah.
- Then go see him.
- You can't get near guys like that.
Are you sure?
I'm an idiot. I should've taken the job.
I'm going out tonight. You got a 50?
Make it a hundred, that way I can treat.
- Thanks.
- Yeah.
That's 150.
- Oh, yeah.
- OK.
- I'll give you this one back.
- Yep.
Thanks.
My eye is twitching, it's weird.
Palpebral tremor.
That's what it's called.
What's the cause?
Fatigue, stress, emotional shock...
Have you had
an emotional shock recently?
- Excuse me?
- Yes?
- It's an email virus.
- Oh, no.
"L Dig You. "
"I Dig You. " It's the name of the virus.
Oh, sorry. I get it.
I thought you were telling me that...
How did we get that?
Someone must have
opened an infected mail.
Why are you looking at me like that?
It wasn't necessarily me.
I didn't open any mails called "I Dig You".
You think Bruno did?
Nonetheless, it wasn't necessarily me.
Can you get rid of it?
- There could be aftereffects.
- OK. Do your best.
- It wasn't me!
- Then who?
I don't know, but I'm not the only one
starved for love in this office!
- Hello?
- Ten am, Tuesday.
- What?
- Leforfs hearing with the judge.
Bruno, we agreed on a settlement.
No, you agreed on a settlement.
Our client wants to go to court.
- He's a jerk.
- He's defending his interests.
No, he's not.
He's making his wife pay for leaving.
He has money and we need funds, darling.
Stop calling me darling!
OK. How do we work it?
- Work what?
- The lease, the clients, our shares.
- You said you wanted to separate.
- I didn't say that.
You said,
"If you don't agree, we'll separate. "
I don't agree, so we'll separate.
Coralie, do you want
to stay with Diane or me?
- You can't ask me that.
- No, Bruno.
Don't put her in that position.
It's not me doing that, it's you.
Look, maybe I overreacted a bit.
We have until Tuesday to decide?
- I'll give it some more thought.
- OK, good.
Coralie, call Lefort
and confirm the hearing for Thursday.
Magnesium.
Excuse me?
You should take magnesium
for your palpebral tremor.
OK.
Don't you have any work to do?
Oh, yes! The Marconi file.
Yes?
- Alexandre, it's Diane.
- Diane!
- Shit.
- Are you OK?
Yes. I hit my head on the ceiling.
Hang on. I'll get out of here.
Sorry.
That's better.
- Where are you?
- In Lige.
The Lige Opera, really.
The Lige Opera?
- We're working on an extension.
- Gosh.
It's a big project. It'll be fabulous.
And how are you?
I'm fine, thank you.
We said we'd call each other...
but maybe this is bad timing?
Not at all. I wanted to call you,
I just didn't find the time.
I understand.
Me too... things are pretty intense.
I have a million things to do.
L won't bother you any longer.
Hang on. What are you doing tonight?
L don't know.
My plane is at five pm.
We could meet at nine if you like?
There's a place I'd like to show you.
It's rather... unusual.
On solid ground?
- It's definitely on solid ground.
- OK, then.
See you tonight, Alexandre.
Thanks. Have a good flight.
- Thanks. See you later.
- OK.
- What?
- Nothing. Here's the Marconi file.
Good.
And for Lefort... postpone the hearing.
- But...
- No buts.
Until Bruno and I reach an agreement,
we're not going.
- Alexandre?
- Over here.
Alexandre?
Right here.
- You scared me.
- It's this way.
Where are we going?
Hey, there.
- Hello, Simone.
- Hey, handsome.
You have a table for two?
- She doesn't say hello?
- Excuse me.
I'm teasing, hon.
Mario! You have a table for Alexandre?
For two.
Have a seat at the bar.
I'll see what we can do.
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
- This place is amazing.
- Isn't it?
It's 100 per cent clandestine.
Cooks from freighters
take turns in the kitchen.
Simone, who's cooking tonight?
Andreas. A Cypriot.
He made squid in black ink sauce.
I want no leftovers!
She's a great gal. But don't cross her.
I'm lucky, she likes me.
From what I see, everyone likes you.
Yeah.
What?
"Everyone" is sort of the same
as "no one".
- Your table is ready.
- Great.
- I can take...
- No, I've got it.
- I'm glad to be here, really.
- It shows.
- Tell me a joke.
- Excuse me?
Tell me a joke.
It'll loosen up the atmosphere.
I'm terrible at jokes.
I never tell them right.
I always think about
the punchline while I'm telling them,
and then I forget the story.
Also, I don't get jokes, because...
- You don't get jokes?
- Never.
I concentrate hard,
but I never know when to laugh...
- You feel embarrassed?
- Very.
And since I'm concentrating,
I don't get them.
So no jokes, sorry.
- OK, I'll go.
- OK.
An Eskimo is waiting for his girlfriend
on the ice field.
He takes a thermometer and says,
"If she's not here by eight, I'm gone. "
I got it.
- That was awful.
- Wasn't it?
OK, your turn.
A female one-humped camel
sees a male two-humped camel
in her path and says,
- "Pity he's a hunchback. "
- I know that one.
- A funny face.
- Yes. Make a funny face for me.
- OK. You sure it'll relax us?
- Sure.
OK. A funny face...
- This is the "plastic surgery" face.
- OK.
- You ready?
- Yes.
I didn't do a thing.
It's 100 per cent natural.
You're ling!
Put your napkin on.
Our Cypriot went to town.
You see, we had a good laugh.
Now, there's someone
who doesn't like me.
- What?
- You said everyone liked me.
- Yes.
- Yes. But not him. Karl Willems.
- Who's that?
- The architect of this building.
I see. Why not?
We were competitors
for a project ages ago, and I won.
He's very tall, so the poor man felt...
humiliated.
You're very beautiful.
What can I say?
"Goodnight, Alexandre"?
I had a fabulous time.
Me too.
Benji!
- You had the hearing postponed?
- Yes.
- But we'd agreed.
- That I needed to think.
If his divorce goes well,
Lefort will let us manage his estate.
The millions he's laundered
in offshore accounts?
- He can save us.
- He can ruin our reputation.
An insolvent law practice
is good for our image?
Money isn't everything.
In the long term, ethics pay off.
Come on, you can trust me.
No. Our five years of marriage taught me,
for one, that I don't know you
and also that you are very far
from what I imagined you to be.
So ask me anything you like,
but not to trust you.
Something's different.
What's changed? You're not the same.
You met someone?
No.
Diane? I have Bergeron on line one.
Alexandre.
His name is Alexandre.
- How do you know?
- I overheard her on the phone.
A cup of coffee?
- Alexandre what?
- I don't know.
Of course, I'll get your coffee right away!
That was borderline.
You're not going to cry?
Because if you do, it'll spoil my victory.
You're OK?
- I'm fine. Can we play?
- Go on.
You OK?
You're not going to cry?
- It'll spoil my victory.
- Go on, wise guy.
Ready?
You know what?
I think your arms are too short.
Let's go.
What exactly are you doing?
Who are you smiling at?
- I'm not smiling.
- Yes, you are. Like this.
Don't be silly.
Are you going home?
I told you, I'm going to the game.
You got a 50?
Hey...
- I've only got a hundred.
- That'll do.
What are you doing?
We're going to Fernand's
for a disco party.
Cool, dancing.
I don't dance.
Who's we?
You said, "We're going. " Who's we?
I'm going with Stephanie and Arnaud
and a girlfriend.
- Do I know her?
- No.
Is she hot?
You gonna bang her?
You're all shy. You're in love!
- What does she do?
- She's a lawyer.
Not bad.
- You going like that?
- Yes. Why, is something wrong?
- What?
- A full-on fashion show?
I'm showing you. Do I look OK?
- You have your heelpieces?
- Of course.
- Awesome.
- Great. OK, I'm going.
Be careful at the stadium.
Crowds are my phobia.
Don't worry. What's her name?
- Diane.
- Blonde or brunette?
Blonde!
Yes?
Coralie's already gone?
- She had her shrink appointment.
- Oh, yeah. I forgot.
Do you have plans tonight?
- I thought we could...
- I have plans.
- See you tomorrow.
- Yes. Sure thing.
This crossroads
might not look like much...
yet a major decision
is about to be made here.
If I turn right...
I take you home...
we kiss goodnight...
and that's the end of that.
But if I turn left...
we go to my place and...
Look at me.
- Good morning.
- Good morning. Sorry...
My name is Diane. I'm...
- I'm Benji. Alexandre's son.
- Yes. Of course.
Of course...
The resemblance is striking.
That's what people say.
Only I'm not as... mature.
- Is he already gone?
- Yes.
I think he went to Lige.
When I woke up,
all this was waiting for me.
That's my dad for you.
Always making sure everyone's happy.
- He's a great guy.
- Yeah.
Do you have kids?
No. I was married, but no children.
Why not?
In the beginning, he didn't want any.
Then I didn't want them any more.
Have you been separated for long?
Three years.
- My parents broke up... ten years ago.
- Oh, yes?
- But it's cool, they get along great.
- Yes.
Yes. It's always better when people
manage to separate intelligently,
- instead of fighting like morons.
- Yes. That's for sure.
You're lucky.
What about you?
Do you get on well with your ex?
Yes.
We did it...
intelligently, so...
we have a good relationship.
- It's cool.
- Yes.
Yes. Cool.
Goodbye.
- See you soon?
- See you soon.
- Good morning.
- Good morning.
What are you doing?
- I'll do that.
- You will?
There we go.
First things first, the news.
Stretch, point, piqu...
OK, let's go, girls.
- Are you sure?
- As sure as I see you.
He was barely higher than the car door.
Maybe the car seat is caved in?
- It's not that kind of car. He's a midget.
- Really?
She found herself a rich midget.
- Hello.
- Hello!
- A little cup of coffee?
- Thank you.
- Bruno wants to see you.
- He can come in here.
I think you'd better go.
OK, I'll go.
- What's wrong?
- Nothing. Are you still twitching?
Yeah. It's really annoying.
- Are you upset?
- Not particularly.
Is it because of your boyfriend?
- My boyfriend? What boyfriend?
- Alexandre.
The one you spoke to
on the phone the other evening.
Oh, yes. Yes.
Yes, his name is Alexandre, but he's not...
You know...
He's not my boyfriend, we're not...
We're just dating.
- Don't have a tizzy.
- I'm not.
- You're ashamed?
- Of what?
That he's a midget.
- Excuse me?
- Yes.
Bruno saw you together
yesterday evening.
I heard he's no higher than the car door.
On, shit.
I don't know what's wrong with me.
- What do you mean?
- I don't know.
You're in love.
That's what's happened to you.
- I don't know.
- Are you kidding?
Do you love him or not?
When we're together, yes.
I feel in love.
But when we're no longer together...
I see me... or us... and it's grotesque.
Why?
Why? Because, like any little girl,
I dreamed of a strong, tall Prince Charming
who'd carry me off to his castle.
I see. Tell me,
about Santa Claus, is it cool?
You know he doesn't exist?
Bruno must've had a good laugh.
No, I thought he was more...
- Troubled?
- No, more like...
- Destabilised?
- No, more like...
Appalled. That's it, appalled.
- You wanted to see me?
- Come in. Have a seat.
- Well?
- Well what?
What do we do?
- About?
- Lefort.
On, that!
- Is there anything else?
- No.
I stand my ground.
I won't defend him.
I don't want my reputation tainted.
OK, Snow White.
Excuse me? What did you say?
I said, "OK, Snow White. "
Why did you call me that?
You're as pure as the driven snow.
Watch your step, Bruno.
You can't do this.
- What?
- This.
This what?
Mock me by calling me Snow White.
- Why not?
- I know you know.
- Know what?
- You know very well.
- That you're dating a dwarf?
- Don't you dare call him that!
It's hurtful and humiliating.
What about me?
My ex-wife is in a couple with a midget.
- I'm not in a couple.
- So it's about sex?
I owe you no explanations. Is that clear?
I'm curious, is it an experiment?
A journey to the outer limits?
Diane!
That's the third time, Mathilde. I said yes.
- You'll pay me back when you can.
- Thanks.
You're welcome.
Still with your dentist?
- More or less.
- "More" or "less"?
Are you crazy?
Shit, I knocked over a kid.
No, it's not a kid.
Sorry, I didn't see you!
- What?
- I said I didn't see you.
- You didn't see me?
- No, I didn't.
- You didn't see me?
- No.
Wait a second.
- Do you see me now?
- Yes.
But over there, I didn't see you.
Hello?
- You see me, right?
- Of course I see you. Come on.
- Excuse me, do you have this in an XS?
- No, sorry.
What's he like?
- What?
- What's he like for his age?
- Is he tall?
- No.
He's not very tall for his age.
Take the ten-year-old.
I got it for my 11-year-old
and it's perfect.
How old is yours?
A little bit older.
OK. I'll take the ten-year-old.
Great. Shall I gift-wrap it?
- No, thank you.
- OK.
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to
all passengers travelling to Los Angeles.
The Air France flight 6710...
Hey, there.
I hope we're going south.
I packed beach stuff.
We're going north?
Who said we're going anywhere?
It's my birthday and you tell me
to meet you at the airport, so...
Sit down.
Did I ever tell you my tractor story?
- No?
- No.
When I was little...
I mean, when I was a kid...
we lived next to a farm.
- You know, next to Grandpa Leon's place.
- Sure.
On the farm, there was a tractor.
And I dreamt of driving it.
My dad would say, "Go and ask the farmer. "
But I was too scared.
One day, on my birthday...
my dad said, "Look, I talked
to the farmer and he agreed. "
I was out of my mind.
I ran over to the farm...
and I realised that the guy had no idea.
But it was too late, I was standing
there in front of him like a fool.
I had to go through with it.
So I explained
that I dreamed of driving his tractor...
and he said yes.
When I returned home...
my dad said
I had two reasons to be happy.
One, I had driven the tractor.
Two, I'd done it on my own.
See that guy over there?
Timo Atanen.
The inaccessible.
He has a flight to Los Angeles at three.
That leaves you...
20 minutes to sell him your project.
I talked to him. He knows about you.
He'll be happy to hear you out.
He was right there.
I hadn't seen him.
Dad says, "Look over there. "
So I go over and tell him
about my project and myself.
He doesn't say a word.
He just sits there looking at me.
Then he says...
"Interesting project.
Call me, we discuss more. "
I was standing there like this, frozen...
and he gives me his card
with his phone number.
I have Timo Atanen's phone number!
Isn't that cool?
Hang on!
Maybe that's him calling!
- It's Max. I have to tell him.
- Sure.
Don't forget your dessert!
I have Timo Atanen's phone number!
What you did was wonderful.
- I didn't do much.
- Yes, you did.
He did it alone, with his little arguments.
I'm proud.
Present.
- What do you mean, "present"?
- Yeah.
- You don't like it?
- I didn't say that.
I think... It's very... original.
- No! You don't like it.
- I'm kidding, I love it.
- I'm joking. I love it.
- Yeah? OK.
- Really?
- Yes.
I'll love it more each day.
It'll get better and better.
I'm... I'm sorry, I'm no good at...
receiving gifts.
Why?
Because I'm not used to receiving gifts.
It's been a long time.
It makes me very happy.
A transparent glass floor...
No, no.
It'll be too classical, too dull.
Let's be daring.
We need to aim big...
What?
What's wrong?
Why are you smiling?
I'm not credible
when I say we need to aim big?
If I say it like this, is that better?
Help me down, I'm dizzy.
OK, then...
- Really?
- No one ever stole my snack again.
You laugh, but it's important.
You have to be tough.
Can I ask you something?
How long do you plan on hiding me?
I'm not hiding you.
What do you mean?
We just haven't had the occasion to...
Stop it.
I have no problem with our relationship.
Honestly.
- OK.
- Thank you.
It's always the same old story.
What?
The women I date refuse
to introduce me to their girlfriends.
They're afraid they'll be jealous.
It's a problem.
- Honestly, it has nothing to do with you.
- Yeah.
I see my friends less often
since my break-up with Bruno.
That's why.
I see them less, because I feel like...
I don't know, like they're uncomfortable
with me now that I'm single.
- And your parents?
- What about my parents?
Are they uncomfortable too?
- You want to meet my parents?
- Why not?
OK. Sure, yes.
No...
I'm seeing my mom and stepdad
at an opening tomorrow.
- Come, if you want.
- OK.
OK?
I'll be there.
I hope so.
It's great.
I can't explain it.
These photos make me feel...
Me too.
It's rare to feel so in tune with an artist.
Do you like them too?
- You haven't said a word.
- No, I think it's great.
Look at this one over here.
Oh, yes. It's...
My feelings exactly.
I'm not sure Philippe
would be happy if I brought one home.
He doesn't seem to dislike them.
He's only interested in what they cost.
He brings home
such awful pieces sometimes!
Oh look, a midget.
Do you know him?
- How are you?
- And you?
- Shall I introduce you?
- Yes.
This is Alexandre, a friend.
Nicole, my mother.
- Pleased to meet you.
- Good evening.
Christine, a long-standing friend.
- It's a pleasure.
- Likewise.
- Would you like something to drink?
- OK.
- Shall I get you a glass of champagne?
- Yes.
Do you like it?
Very much.
I love the bermensch aspect.
- The what?
- bermensch.
Superhuman. I can identify.
You're interested in architecture too?
My father...
was aimed at the Beaux-Arts
by Hang-us Per-rot.
- By whom'?
- Hang-us Per-rot. The architect oi La-va.
- Auguste Perret. Le Havre.
- Of course, yes.
He loved too-teat.
No!
He loved concrete!
- Yes!
- I see, concrete.
Concrete is a fabulous material.
You can do anything with it.
My father was a pioneer.
- He was hard of hearing, like me.
- I see.
- It's hereditary?
- Deaf.
- He was deaf.
- No, no.
- He's asking if it's hereditary.
- Oh, I see.
- What about you?
- No, not at all.
- Your family is normal-sized?
- Yes. I'm the only one.
- How about another bottle of wine?
- I'm the only one.
- It was a growth problem.
- Waiter?
- I see.
- Waiter!
And what do you do, Nicole?
I tend to my garden now.
But I worked for many years
with my first husband, Diane's father.
He had a textile business.
- Remember?
- Yes.
It was something else.
- And you've moved on to gardening?
- That's right.
We discovered a common passion.
Excuse me, I'll be right back.
We tried growing vegetables,
but it didn't work.
How's it going?
Your necks aren't getting stiff?
Maybe we could move closer?
Or talk more loudly?
I wouldn't want you to miss the show.
- Here's your coffee.
- Thank you.
- Did Alexandre leave?
- It was no good.
- What was no good?
- No!
His mobile signal was bad.
He got a call and stepped out to answer it.
- OK.
- Why are you so agitated?
I'm not agitated. Not at all.
Did you know he was building
an opera house in Lige?
Actually, it's an extension.
Nonetheless... The little gentleman
must be a big architect.
- Mother...
- What?
Come on.
He's knee-high to a grasshopper
and handles huge projects.
Do you hear yourself?
What's wrong with you tonight?
I think he's fantastic.
How did you meet him? Is he a client?
Yes.
You're like your father. No sacrifice
is too great for success in business!
- I don't get it.
- He's completely smitten.
It's written all over his face.
- Not at all.
- He looks hot to trot to me!
He reminds me
of Mrs Lemaire's teeny dog.
He wanted to mount Mrs Fran;u's bitch.
Remember, Philippe?
Of course you do.
- Is this really necessary?
- Oh, sorry.
I'm sorry!
Can't we even have fun any more?
Look, he's paying our bill.
Stop him!
Come on, if it makes him happy.
It'll make him feel important.
It can't be easy.
Well, that's done.
What's wrong?
Can I go on?
Go on what?
Believing in us.
What do you mean? I just introduced you
to my mother and stepfather.
Look...
It's not that simple.
I don't see what's complicated.
- You take up lots of space.
- Me?
Yes, you.
I'm always worried
about whether I'm thoughtful enough,
or if I'm hurting your feelings.
It's all about you.
- That's not true.
- Well, that's how I feel.
I wasn't expecting to meet
someone like you, it just happened.
It's great. But I'm supposed
to accept everything unconditionally?
Even with a normal man, it's not like that.
That's not what I meant.
Oh, damn! It's exactly what I meant.
It's not easy.
I'm sure there were other women
who left because of that.
Because it's not easy.
Am I wrong?
No.
Can I go on or not?
Go on driving me nuts? No.
No, Luchio. Not tonight.
I did warn you.
Be careful what you say, counsellor.
I could sue you for slander.
Listen...
Where did you hear that?
Bruno slept with the judge?
I'm sorry, Carsoni's ethics
are beyond reproach.
- What?
- You have a visitor!
Who?
- Alexandre?
- Yes!
OK, we'll change judges.
I said all right. Goodbye.
He so cute, you want to just...
- Is Bruno in his office?
- Yes.
Don't let him see him.
I don't want them to meet.
- Hi, there.
- Hi.
I was in the neighbourhood,
so I popped in to see where you work.
- Good idea.
- It was a great idea!
This is Coralie, our assistant.
- We already met.
- We already met.
We said it at the same time!
I still have work to do.
Do you want to come into my office?
- Yes.
- OK.
Fabulous sculpture.
It was a present from her ex-father-in-law,
the daddy of Bruno, her partner.
A little cup of coffee? A little cup of tea?
A little something?
A little glass of water?
- You coming?
- Yes.
- I have two little things to finish.
- Go ahead.
I didn't know you had curly hair.
- You like it better?
- No.
- Have you lost your mind?
- What?
- We can't change judges!
- This isn't the moment.
- I don't care!
- Bruno!
- This isn't the moment.
- It's ridiculous!
- I don't give a shit! Answer me!
- Stop it!
I want an answer. I won't go until...
It's taken.
- No need to get down.
- But of course.
- Alexandre, Bruno. Bruno, Alexandre.
- My pleasure.
Sorry, I didn't know you were...
Could you people knock on that door?
Sorry! I have his little cup of water.
- Thanks. - I didn't fill it
to the top, so it won't spill.
And ta-da!
Surprise! I brought you a straw.
We'll continue
this conversation in your office.
- Give me five minutes.
- Sure.
- Shall I keep you company?
- Sure.
You slept with the judge?
- He's not a real midget.
- Tell me. Did you sleep with her?
More like a Lilliputian.
He's small, that's all. It's a problem
with the pitulary gland... the putilary...
- Pituitary gland.
- Yes.
- Did you sleep with her?
- What's it to you?
Are you jealous?
What's going on?
In the past, you'd do anything to win.
- I've changed.
- No, you've given up.
There's a theory
about over-successful people and guilt.
One day it's too much
and they screw everything up.
- Don't be silly.
- Look at you.
You dump me, ruin your firm,
and fall for a dwarf.
Talk about being a loser.
That dwarf, as you put it,
is far above average. He's exceptional.
Next to him, you're...
you're not even this high.
You're nothing.
Leave her alone.
I've stayed cool until now,
but that could change.
- Did you follow me?
- No, I didn't follow you.
Your story with Diane is over.
She's with me now, so move on.
Are you threatening me?
I'm just saying that my patience
has limits, that's all.
I don't believe it.
Come on, get out.
You think your three feet two scare me?
I'm merely setting limits.
Diane made her choice and it's not you.
I think you don't get it.
- I'll smash your face, arsehole.
- Arsehole?
- Yes, arsehole.
- You can't call me an arsehole..
- Come on.
- Hey, big guy!
- Pick on someone your own size!
- Come on, come on!
Hey, midget, go for the jugular!
Come on, come on.
OK. Now that you've got the message,
I suggest we act like adults.
I'm having a party on Saturday.
You should come.
It would make Diane happy.
It'll show her that you're friends,
that you accept her new life.
Be a sport. See you Saturday.
I'm glad you suggested an outing.
It's been ages.
It'll give us a chance to talk.
Did you meet someone?
- You're unbelievable.
- You're my girl.
Is it serious?
Is he married? Divorced?
Not a client whose ex-wife ruined him!
- Of course not.
- So who is it? Do I know him?
- Yes, you do.
- Tell me!
- It's Alexandre.
- Alexandre...
- The Berthot boy?
- No, not him.
It's Alexandre...
We had dinner together last week.
- What are you doing?
- Nothing, sweetie. You were saying?
- I love Alexandre and want to marry him.
- Of course.
Mother! Watch out!
- He's a man like any other!
- Of course, sweetie.
Oh, my God! Mother!
No, not like any other.
He's head and shoulders above them.
Absolutely.
- Hey, watch it, lady!
- Look out!
The only thing that should matter to you...
I'm listening, sweetie.
The only thing that should matter
is my happiness.
Yes, your happiness, darling.
Nothing else.
What's he doing there? Go on, back up.
Unbelievable.
Big place here.
Must seem even bigger to you.
You see?
Being small has its advantages.
- Are there toilets too?
- They're first on the right over there.
Thanks.
- You OK?
- Yes.
I haven't seen your mother.
No, me neither. It's strange.
Where's Monique?
She should be serving guests.
- Will you excuse me?
- Sure.
Monique?
Napkins...
Shit! Shit!
Shit!
What are you doing? Pull-ups?
I'm going to fall.
Let me call Diane
so she can admire her hero in action.
No, don't do that!
Just watch me... Diane!
You're being small.
And you're proud
of stealing someone's wife?
- She's not your wife.
- Nor yours for much longer. Diane!
Excuse me.
This is a lose-lose situation.
Beat me like a man if you must.
You mean, like a duel?
- Yes.
- With swords? Pistols?
- I was thinking more of table football.
- Table football?
I'm not playing table football for Diane.
Ping-pong?
- Alexandre?
- Yes?
- You called me?
- Yes.
Can you help us with the petits fours?
Yes.
Aren't there any napkins?
The... Could you grab the napkins
from up there, please, Bruno?
- Thanks.
- But of course.
- I'll kick your arse.
- Yeah, right.
Stupid dog.
Who are you writing to like that?
Was I talking to you?
Diane. I'm worried about her.
She said she has a new beau.
- The little man?
- How did you know?
It wasn't hard to guess.
And you don't care?
You think it's normal?
Philippe...
She's dating an invalid.
You live with an invalid too.
What are you talking about?
There's no comparison.
You're hard of hearing.
That's not the same. It's not physical.
What I mean is... it doesn't show!
Damn it! You know what I mean!
You're right.
I'm the one who lives with an invalid.
Philippe!
God damn it.
Want an ice cream?
- No, thanks.
- No? Will you wait for me?
- Hello.
- Hello!
My son, Auguste.
- Hello.
- Hello.
How about yours? Was the size all right?
- Yes, just fine.
- Great.
Hello.
Hello.
It's perfect.
It's no big deal.
Diane, it's no big deal.
- You OK?
- Just fine.
Come and sit down.
Are you mad?
- Aren't you?
- At what?
At life for making you this way.
I've never known anything else.
If I'd been tall before being short,
maybe I'd be mad, but...
Are you mad you're blonde?
- Do you hate me for being small?
- Come on.
How could I hate you? It's...
It's painful.
Now, pain is something I know about.
What's most painful?
My neck.
You never fell in love
with someone your size?
Yes, when I was five.
But she kept growing.
You're an extraordinary man.
You know that?
With you, I feel... loved.
Understood too. That's rare.
I miss you when you're not there.
I learn more every day.
You make the world a bigger place.
It's funny to say that, but it's true.
I want to live with you...
I really want to...
But you can't do it.
I asked you, Diane.
- "Can I go on?" Remember?
- Yes.
"Can I go on believing in us?"
I'm not six feet tall, I'm four foot five.
I never hid it from you.
You didn't only just find out. Right?
I know. You're right.
And I know
that what's most important is us...
that others don't count, but I can't let go.
It's all those images in your head
of what love is supposed to look like.
It's you who has
these images in your head.
Go home now.
Go home.
No. We need a green light from City Hall
before the Ministry of Culture's
authorisation.
Of course.
Monique! You've been dusting that
for ten minutes. I think that'll do.
Move on to something else.
We'll find ourselves in a deadlock,
like in Stockholm.
Hang on, please.
Monique. Finish the dusting.
Do that afterwards.
That's right...
Of course it matters.
The green roof is what they liked.
We can't start all over again.
I don't believe it.
Monique!
- I'm on the phone!
- And I'm vacuuming.
Make up your mind.
If that's how it is, I'm leaving!
Call me when you've calmed down.
- How's it going?
- Fine, thanks.
Forget about her, Dad.
She's not worth it.
Yes, she is worth it.
She did what she could.
How do you see me?
What do you mean?
How do you see me?
I don't know.
I see you in lots of different ways.
As a father.
As a talented architect.
As a friend, sometimes.
What about my size?
It's never bothered you?
When I was a kid, I didn't realise.
I started noticing how people looked at you
when I was a teenager.
My friends, their parents,
the other kids at school...
But I didn't give a shit.
Because you didn't give a shit.
Has being small always been painful?
Of course it has.
People either stare too much
or don't even see me.
I pretend not to care, but I'm lying.
I lie to myself, to others, even to you.
It's not lies. You're strong.
And you have dignity.
That's what I see in you.
Dignity.
I'm a bit tired of being small.
Your Honour.
- I'm Counsellor Berthier. Hello.
- Pleased to meet you.
- You represent my client's husband?
- That's right.
- You must be...
- Galle Lefort.
Your client's wife. Or rather ex-wife.
- Pleased to meet you.
- And you.
- Am I disturbing you?
- Not at all. Come in.
- What are you doing?
- Pretending to work as usual.
It's good to see you smile.
It's been a long time.
Since you're in a good mood...
I told Lefort
we're no longer representing him.
No way. You did that?
You're right,
there's no compromising with ethics.
- Wow, I'm surprised. You impress me.
- No, I wouldn't face facts.
The guy's a sleazebag
who treats his ex-wife like dirt.
Absolutely! It's scandalous.
I'm glad you see it.
That's why we're going to defend her.
Excuse me?
Yes, his ex-wife, Galle.
We're defending her.
You slept with her.
That's not the point.
- You're incorrigible.
- So what?
His dough is stashed in Luxembourg.
She has tons of proof.
- We'll ruin him.
- You're sick.
- We'll be rich! Diane!
- Good Lord.
Diane! Diane, listen to me!
Why don't you trust me?
Is Alexandre here?
No.
- He's in Lige?
- Maybe.
Do you know when he'll be back?
Please, don't treat me like this.
I'm not your enemy.
How am I treating you?
It's complicated for me too.
It's complicated?
You've hurt him enough.
Stop messing with him.
He's my father and I love him.
Leave him alone.
In fact, you're the midget.
You're an emotional midget.
Your body's normal,
but you're tiny on the inside.
A tiny little heart with
tiny little feelings.
But it's normal.
It all goes back to childhood.
They filled our heads with stereotypes.
We're completely formatted.
And when anyone's slightly different,
we can't accept it.
- You're right.
- We can't stand it.
We want everybody to be the same.
Want me to tell you?
We're Nazis, that's what we are.
A bunch of frigging Nazis!
Oh, sweetheart.
I'm so sorry, sweetie.
- This is very touching,
but it's a bit late. - Why?
- He refuses to talk to her.
- No!
It's never too late.
Find him and show him
how you really feel. Where is he?
- In Lige, I think.
- Then go right away.
- But what will I say?
- Who cares? He doesn't need words.
He only needs to see you.
Alexandre!
Alexandre, it's Diane!
Alexandre, it's me!
The parachute was a dumb idea.
But I wanted to show you
I wasn't afraid any more.
That I was ready to take the leap.
You know, like a metaphor.
But who cares about metaphors?
I wanted to say that I love you.
And that I'm ready to live with you.
I'm not saying it'll be easy every day.
That I won't want to...
slug people who stare at us, but...
I swear I've understood one thing.
I know.
I know that other people don't matter.
I know I'm the one who decides.
I know I'm the one who loves you.
And everyone else will get used to it.
I know that.
I'm free.
It took me a while, but I'm free.
I love you, little man.
Your neck will hurt. My back will hurt.
We'll suffer together. Who cares?