1
Hey sis, it's me.
I got my plane ticket.
I will be getting in first
thing Saturday morning.
And I wish you would
have just let me pay
to ship your car up here.
Maybe you're right.
Maybe this drive is just
what you need right now.
I,
I saw that you deleted
your Facebook account.
I have no way of seeing
that sweet face of yours.
Raven,
I know this is hard.
I miss her too.
Raven, hey, it's me.
I'm so, so, so sorry,
but there's been
a change of plans.
I got called to do
ER duty this weekend
and there is absolutely no
one else that can do it.
It has to be me.
I'm so sorry.
So, my girlfriend Jessica,
she's gonna fly down there
and she's gonna make the
drive with you, okay.
Look, I know, I know,
I know what you're gonna say,
but please,
please give her a chance,
please for me.
Okay, I, I don't think
that you should be
doing this drive
alone right now, okay.
All right, I will see you soon.
I love you.
Stay strong, okay.
Bye.
Palm trees, bare skin,
Sunset in July
To still I laugh again
Sunscreen in hand
Sunset let me go to bed now
California's been
working me to death
And I've had not a lot
Who knew then
This would be forever
Who knew then
This would be forever
I should have known
better than this
I should have known
better than this
Tide's rolling out
Don't you wish you could too
So where too now
And this sunburns
gonna leave a scar
It's gonna give
me cancer one day
If I don't move to
somewhere with shade
This sunburn
gonna leave a scar
I'm gonna
Who knew then
This would be forever
Who knew then
This would be forever
And I should have
known better than this
I should have known
better than this
Tide's rolling out
Don't you wish you could too
So where to now
It's messed up, isn't it?
Tragic even.
What?
Relationships.
I feel like some of
the best ones end
before they even get a
chance to get started.
Oh man,
don't do that, okay.
Not now.
You're gonna make me lose it.
We already packed the tissue.
I'm just stating the obvious.
Okay, we were on the road
to becoming the
best roommates ever.
Ever in the history
of roommatedom.
I don't know, it's just
sad I guess.
It makes me feel bad.
I can't help feeling
bad about it.
No one should feel
bad about anything.
But thanks.
I think you're
pretty great, too.
I guess the saying is true.
Blood is thicker than water.
Or margaritas.
I am going miss our margaritas.
I'm gonna miss you too.
Life's so random, isn't it?
I mean people meet,
relationships start
and then just suddenly end.
Bad shit happens, out
of the fucking blue.
It's like life's
some cosmic joke.
I mean I'm telling you
God has got to be a woman
because only a real
bitch would do that shit
to people's lives.
Thank you.
My pleasure, young lady.
You enjoy that 900 mile
drive back to New York now.
Y'all be careful
going down the road.
Oh, we will.
Raven?
You must be Jessica.
Hey, it's really
nice to meet you.
Oh, hi.
Hi.
Wow, you're so much
prettier than Kyle said.
Oh gosh, thanks.
No, thank you.
I mean it's really
nice of you to do this.
It means a lot.
Yeah, it's okay,
it's no problem.
I know I'm a sorry substitute
for your own brother,
but everything was
so last minute.
No, not at all.
I'm actually really glad
that we're gonna get a
chance to know each other.
He's talked so much about you.
Oh, yeah, me too.
Well, there she is.
She's all gassed up,
packed up, ready to go.
Oh, okay.
Um, do you actually mind if
we go inside for a minute?
I was actually thinking
that we'd just hit the road,
you know?
I want to beat the traffic.
Well, of course.
It was just sort
of a long flight.
Uh, I, I would but the
house is already locked up
and my only set of keys is in
the kitchen for the landlord.
Really?
But you know we are
gonna be on a road trip.
I'm sure you can just pop
a squat out back, you know?
Oh, um, yeah, great.
It's pretty private back there.
I mean there is a neighbor
on the second floor
that I'm pretty
sure was jerking off
while I was sun bathing the
other day, but you know.
You serious?
No, I mean it's fine.
Like I'm sure he's
not there now.
Um, okay.
This is embarrassing, but...
It's fine, man, just you know,
I'll be here waiting.
Yeah.
You ready?
Yeah.
Okay.
Don't worry, we're gonna
have a great time, I promise.
Yeah, yes.
So it's kind of cool you
and Kyle are both in
the medical field.
You're a nurse, right?
Medical tech.
But I'm going for my RN,
maybe nurse practitioner,
I'm not really sure yet.
Yeah, Kyle said they had some
really good programs up by us.
Listen, Jessica, don't feel
like you have to make bullshit
small talk with me, okay.
You can relax.
It's gonna be a long trip
and I'm sure we'll get
to know each other.
Probably even more
than you and Kyle do
by the time we get to New York.
So, how long have you
been dating my brother?
Almost a month.
Get the fuck out.
I thought this was
way longer than that,
I mean the way he
talks about you.
Yeah, a month this
weekend actually.
But we were talking online
for a long time before that,
so we really felt like
we got to know each other
really well before we, you
know, actually met face to face.
No, I get it.
The whole love at
first sight thing.
It's so twentieth century.
Shakespearean even.
What century is that?
What, like 16th?
Yeah, something like that.
So 16th century.
It's cool though.
I mean, when you know you know.
When you meet the right person,
it just kind of
hits you in the guts, you know.
I mean I got worried
there for a minute.
You know he was just
banging bimbo after bimbo.
I mean you should have
seen some of these bitches
that were coming through.
Whoof.
Head East on
Mulberry Road Northwest.
In two miles turn
left onto Highway 53.
In one mile turn
left onto Highway 53.
Shut the fuck up.
Highway 53.
You know in fact,
We don't need that
fucking thing.
I mean I have this whole
trip planned out anyway.
We're gonna take back
roads the whole way.
I mean who wants to look at
the fucking interstate anyway.
Uh, what, what happens
if we get lost though?
I, don't you think it'd
be better if we had that
as a backup plan?
Backup plan?
A backup plan is
for little bitches
that need to call their daddy
for every little
thing that happens.
I mean come on, where's
your sense of adventure?
I want to get lost
a couple times.
Hell, I mean the whole
point of this thing
is to have an experience, right.
Don't worry, you'll be fine.
I'll protect you.
Like you're my own
little baby sister.
What?
You.
Me what?
You're just not quite
what I expected, that's all.
What were you expecting?
Uh, I don't know.
Kyle said you were like, uh...
What?
Kyle said I was what?
Well, not exactly
the spontaneous type.
Kind of like super
organized and together.
A little overly so.
I think anal is
the word he used.
Anal, hmm.
So what, you think I don't
have my shit together.
Is that what you're saying?
Uh, no, I didn't,
I didn't mean that.
What, you think
something's wrong with me?
I'm surprised,
I didn't realize you're
so judgmental, Jessica.
I don't.
I'm not judging you.
No, no, no, no,
it's cool, it's cool.
You think I'm
fucking crazy, right?
I'm crazy, whoo!
Listen, I'm crazy, you're crazy,
we're all gonna go fucking
crazy on this trip,
cause guess what, this
is the crazy train
and you can't get off now.
I think I might've
changed my mind.
Take me back to the airport.
I'm gonna run in and grab a tea.
You want something?
Grab me a few
more energy drinks.
Seriously?
Better take it easy
with those things.
You going for some kind
of record or something?
Hey, gotta feed the
monster in this bitch.
Oh, sorry, double
security locks.
The previous owner
had them installed.
I think her mom had Alzheimer's
or epilepsy or something.
What's up?
My phone.
I thought I left it in here.
Did you see it?
No.
Did you check your purse?
Yes, I checked my fucking purse.
What do you think,
it's not in there.
Okay, just chill.
I'm sure it's in here somewhere.
Did you check under the seat?
Yeah, and it's not in
between the seats either.
Maybe I left it inside.
Hey asshole, watch
where you're going.
Oh my god.
Are you okay?
Yeah, I think so.
Hey look, there are worse things
than losing your phone, right.
Come on, let's go.
I can't believe I lost my phone.
I've never done that before.
You've never lost your phone?
Man, I've broken or lost at
least like six of them by now.
You seriously have never
lost your phone before?
Well, once, at a
party in high school.
Or it was stolen.
I mean I was so wasted I
wouldn't have known either way.
The lightweight that I am.
You're a lightweight?
Man, I would have pegged you
for a hardcore
party girl for sure.
Gosh, I haven't even talked
to Kyle since I landed.
Oh, seriously?
Here let me fix that, hold on.
Voicemail.
Hey big bro, this is your
adorable little sister
and possibly even more
adorable girlfriend
just calling you from the road.
I can see why you fell
for her, she's delicious.
Anyway, I'm sure
you're stitching up
some drunk's lacerated ass
or calming down some
overprotective parents
whose kid has a head cold.
But uh, we just
wanted to let you know
that everything's cool.
Other than the fact that
your airhead girlfriend
lost her phone.
I mean, I'm sure we'll find it.
Don't worry about it.
But anyway, until then just, uh,
give me a call back on my phone
and we will see
you in a few days.
All right, bye bro, we love you.
Bye.
I hope it wasn't
presumptuous of me
to say that you love him.
No, I tell him
that all the time.
I'm his girlfriend.
I mean it wasn't so cool
calling me an airhead though.
I was kidding.
I mean obviously
you're not an airhead.
You're like some smart
college girl, right?
Come on, you are.
What's your major?
Well, I haven't declared,
but I'm leaning
toward psychology.
Psychology, see.
How smart do you have to
be to study Freud and shit?
I didn't mean it.
You don't have to
be so sensitive.
Look, I'm really sorry, okay?
I am.
We friends?
Are you gonna sit and
sulk the whole time
or you gonna like
give me a smile?
Come on.
I thought we already figured
this whole thing out.
Yeah, okay.
Great, good, I thought I
lost you there for a minute.
Sorry.
Geez.
Hey boys, how's it hanging?
Called out
King me asshole.
Crumble
In your wake
I might need you to take over
for me in a little bit here.
Oh, no problem.
Just let me know when.
Why don't you see if you
can get something
on that shitbox.
Y'all don't forget the swap meet
and antique auction is
goin' on this Saturday.
It's the event of the season,
so don't snooze and lose on it.
Go out and get yourself some.
Here's a little number
from Flappy Mitchell's
Flatbed Rangers,
right here for you.
Aw, fuck me.
Were were going sixty, right?
I mean how fast is
the speed limit here?
Look, it's no big deal.
It's okay.
License, registration
and insurance please.
Sure.
Why did you
not immediately pull over
at the sound of my siren?
I was just a bit confused.
I'm not from here.
Did I have a tail
light out or something?
I'll ask the questions
if you don't mind, miss.
Can you provide your license,
registration and
insurance, please?
Sure.
It was a long time ago.
I used to experiment with
different hair colors.
Don't you?
Registration?
I think it's in the
glove compartment.
Can you check?
Slowly.
Hands where I can see them.
I don't see it.
Are you sure it's in here?
Yeah, I think so.
Officer, are you gonna tell
us why you pulled us over?
You were traveling
at an excessive speed.
This is a 45 mile per hour zone.
You were going 70.
71 to be exact.
45?
It's 60 down this whole highway.
I didn't see a sign.
There is a sign clearly marked
three quarters of a mile back.
What, tucked behind a
rock or painted on a pig?
Miss, shut the glove compartment
and step out of the vehicle.
What?
Step out of the
vehicle, both of you, now.
Take a seat right down
there between the cars.
You trying to look up
our shorts or something?
Miss, if you don't shut up,
I will place you under arrest.
Am I gonna have to
go to court for this?
You were traveling
at 26 miles per hour
over the speed limit.
You'll be expected back here
for court on the assigned date.
No, no, please no.
I'm on my way to New York,
I'm moving there to
be with my brother.
Our mom died just very recently.
And this is his girlfriend,
and she's helping
me make the drive.
And please, officer, please,
you can't make me come
back here, I can't.
You have to understand,
I can't come back here.
Miss, there's no
need to get upset.
Please, officer, please.
I can't come back here.
Shit heel.
What?
He did let us go,
he didn't have to.
Yeah, but he's
just gonna unleash
on the next unsuspecting
motherfucker.
He'll just climb right back up
in his little deer blind and
just pick them off one by one.
No, I think he
really felt for you.
Yeah, and I think he really
felt something for
you in his pants.
No, I mean it.
When you started crying,
I could see it in his eyes.
His face just turned.
You really got to the poor guy.
You just wanna believe
the best about everybody,
don't you?
Everything's just fucking
unicorns and rainbows for you.
Hey, Raven?
What?
I can't imagine what
you're going through, I know.
But I'm really sorry
about your mom.
Thanks.
Look, I'm sorry about,
about what I said about the
unicorns and rainbows thing.
I don't know that about you.
That's okay.
But I bet you did have
them on your lunch box
or your backpack.
My book bag, yeah.
And sunflowers.
Oh, the sunflowers,
how could I forget
the sunflowers?
You feel better?
You slept pretty hard.
Yeah, thanks for
uh, taking over.
You like the car?
She drives nice, huh?
Yeah, it does.
Real smooth for a
small sedan, I like it.
Done so much in
this car, I feel like,
I don't know,
it's just like it becomes
part of you, you know?
Just did a lot of crazy shit.
That wouldn't have anything
to do with boys, would it?
It does kind of have
a small backseat.
I can't lie and say
that I haven't utilized it
from time to time.
But no, I wasn't
talking about boys.
But you seem to know quite a bit
about spending some time in
the backseat with a few boys.
What?
No.
I'm a one guy kind of girl.
I don't give it up easy.
Kyle is quit the
catch, isn't he?
Yeah, he is.
Kyle's the best.
Yeah, my brother's great.
He's one in a million.
You bored, you look bored.
No, no, I'm good.
I'm just taking it all in.
It's really pretty down here.
You know I thought I would
be bored but I'm really not.
Okay, so you're bored shitless.
Why don't we play an old
fashioned driving game?
A driving game?
What, you mean like the ones
you play with your family
on long trips as a kid?
Fighting with your brother
and sister the whole way
and bad body odor all around.
Those kind of games?
Yeah, those kind of games.
It could be fun.
A good way to kill the time.
I didn't think you were
the driving game type.
I'm just full of
surprises, just wait and see.
Come on, pick one.
Um, oh God, okay,
how about I spy?
I spy?
Yeah, I spy.
You know, I spy
with my little eye,
and then you have to give a hint
about something that you see
and the other person
guesses what it is.
What, really?
I spy is like the oldest
driving game ever.
I'm pretty sure the
settlers used to play it.
I spy with my little eye,
hmm, something tall
and brown and leafy.
Oh no, here, I've got
another one for you.
I spy with my little eye,
something dead, bloody
and covered in maggots
and splattered
all over the road.
Okay, I don't know.
Look, we can't play
license plates.
That would kind of be hard.
You ever play hot seat?
Hot seat?
Yeah, it's fun.
It's like, uh,
truth or dare, but
more intense, more rapid fire.
I don't know, we're not 13.
Come on, it's a great way
to get to know each other.
Get a glimpse into
each other's character.
I mean, come on, you're
studying psychology.
This should be
right up your alley.
I mean unless, you know,
you have something to hide.
I mean I thought that, you
know, we're friends here.
Didn't have anything to
hide from each other.
Okay, how do we play?
All right, one person
is in the hot seat
and the other person gets
to ask five questions.
Anything you want.
It can be as mundane as,
I don't know, what
was your first pet?
To
Something really,
really personal.
And the only thing
that you have to
answer the question
or you get a little smack.
What do you mean a smack?
Just like a little smack.
No.
Oh come on, it's
like a love tap.
I'll even go first.
Ask me anything you want.
What's your heart's desire?
Shoot.
Hmm, I don't know,
give me an example.
Uh, did you ever cheat
on a test in high school?
Oh, okay, so we're doing
like gloves off kind of stuff.
Well yeah, obviously gloves off.
Especially when it
comes to the smacking.
Haha.
Okay, let's do it.
You're in the hot seat?
Yes, question one.
Shoot.
Okay.
What was your first pet?
Very imaginative.
Uh, it was a parakeet,
named Jemima.
Next question.
What was the worst
job you ever had?
You're really cutting
me deep here, Jessica.
Oh, okay, hold on.
I'm building up.
Alright, um, the
worst job I ever had.
Picking up trash on
the side of the road.
That was a job?
Think about it more like
a volunteer opportunity.
It was only one afternoon
but it felt like forever.
You wouldn't believe
some of the shit
that people throw out
of their car windows.
I mean, half eaten
bags of fast food,
used condoms.
It's disgusting, I
even found a dead bird.
Okay, ew, I've
heard enough, no more.
Wait, was it Jemima?
No, it wasn't Jemima.
Now ask the next goddamn
question, come on.
Okay.
Mmm, how old were you
when you had your first kiss?
Nine.
Nine?
Yeah, nine.
Okay.
Next question.
Have you ever wished you
could be somebody else?
Why would I want
to be somebody else?
What, seriously,
you've never wished you
could ever be anybody else,
even for a day?
No, why would I?
What, okay, that's it,
I'm giving you a smack.
I thought you had
to answer honestly
or else you get a smack.
You're getting one.
Come on, every little girl
dreams of being somebody else.
Fine, fine.
Oprah.
You are full of it!
Oh my gosh, Oprah?
What?
Okay, I'll let it
slide, this time.
Last question, let's go.
Okay, okay, last question.
Last question in the hot seat.
The big one.
You ready?
I'm just dying of anticipation.
Okay.
Who was the greatest
love of your life?
Nah.
I'm not gonna answer that.
No, actually rather I
choose not to answer that.
It's my prerogative.
Okay, come on, spill it.
What do I care.
No, just give me
a smack, come on.
I don't want to smack you.
Jessica, those are the rules.
Smack me.
I said I'm not gonna smack you.
Jessica, just shut up and
fucking smack me, come on.
Okay.
You're kidding, right?
What?
No, what do you want?
Are you gonna slap me for real
or you just gonna give me
like that little
pussy bullshit again?
Come on.
Fine.
Ooh, she's got a
little fire in her.
Thank God, I was
starting to worry.
Sorry, you asked for it.
There you go, that's the game.
You ready?
Your turn.
Okay.
All right, ladies and gentlemen,
we're asking Jessica
her first question here.
Did you vote in
the last election?
Uh, sorry couldn't
quite hear ya, uh,
we're gonna need
a verbal answer.
No, okay.
No, I didn't.
Not the last one.
Wow.
All right.
I'm, I feel so enlightened now.
I mean now I know why the
world has gone to shit.
You know, you're
not participating...
Stop.
Listen, I get it.
I respect that you are
a woman of conviction.
But you know,
just don't really care
what happens to the world.
I do, too.
All right, fine.
Um, what was the most
embarrassing thing
that ever happened
to you as a kid?
I tooted.
I'm sorry, did you
just say you tooted?
Yeah, I tooted.
I farted, in class.
That's it?
What, no this was
no ordinary fart.
I was in the third grade
and I was leaning
up against my desk
with my butt in
the air, you know.
And somebody said
something funny
and it just bursted out of me.
It sounded like a popgun.
And then all the
kids stared at me
and started laughing,
including the
teacher, Mrs. Folk.
I must have turned a
hundred shades of red.
I mean, I guess that's
pretty bad for a third grader.
Okay, third question.
Are you gonna ask or what?
Umm,
how many guys have you slept
with, more or less than six?
Less!
Definitely less.
All right, we've got
a virtuous one here.
I mean, albeit politically
lazy but virtuous.
All right, what's
your favorite position
with my brother Kyle?
What, what, what?
No, no I'm not telling you that.
You have to answer.
No.
Those are the rules, Jessica.
Give me your arm.
Ow!
What the fuck?
Sorry, I didn't realize
that I hit you that hard.
You okay?
Fine, I have one more
question and then you're done.
Have you ever wanted
to kill somebody?
Yeah.
You right about now.
See, I told you
you'd love this game.
No, I definitely did not.
I never want to play it again.
Come on, you love it.
No, it was terrible.
The worst.
Did I win?
It's not about winning.
Jesus, such an overachiever.
Give me the key
So I can drive
So I can drive
So I can drive
So I can drive
Give me a light
So I can see
So I can see
So I can see
So I can see
This one's on me.
Oh, you don't have to do that.
No, no, no, come on I got this.
Okay, thanks.
Have a nice day.
Hey there.
Oh, hi, can I help you?
I sure as hell hope you can.
Do you guys have
slaw on your burgers?
Slaw?
Yeah, sure.
Slaw, onions, chili,
cheese, if you want it.
All right, well what
do you call a burger
with everything on it?
Oh, uh, all the way.
All they way, huh?
Yeah.
All right, well we will
have two Jimbo Burgers,
all the way.
How do you want yours cooked?
Medium.
Not undercooked, please.
And I would like mine rare.
Bloody and all the way.
Will that,
Will that be all?
No, we would also like
two Jimbo fries, jumbo size.
Okay, that's, uh,
two Jimbo burgers,
all the way.
And, uh, two Jumbo Jimbo Fries?
Yep.
And we're in a hurry.
You having fun
with this poor kid?
Yeah, come on, it's fun.
Hmm.
So Kyle hasn't called back yet?
Did you check your messages?
Yeah, nothin', sorry.
But we can try him again later.
Okay.
I don't think I've ever
felt heat like this.
Uh, here, here you go.
Where's the sweet tea?
Uh, pardon?
I mean how do you expect me
to eat all of this delicious
food without sweet tea?
Well, you, you, you, you
didn't order no sweet tea.
You really think that I
would order all this food
and not order something
to wash it down with?
Well, well,
I don't, I don't know, miss.
Its okay.
Well go run back and
get me my sweet tea.
Yes, ma'am, miss,
uh, right away.
Let's go.
What?
Come on.
Oh shit.
Oh my God!
Go back!
No fucking way.
Oh, come on, just
shut the fuck up.
Eat your Jimbo fries.
You're out of your goddamn mind.
What's wrong with you?
You sure you're related to Kyle?
This is why I never
could have done this alone.
White line fever.
That's what truckers call it.
Road hypnosis.
Just kind of get,
get lost in the road.
Your mind just
wanders, you know.
The next thing you
know you're just
wrapped around a tree
or a power line and
they're toe tagging you
and sending you
off to the morgue.
Anyway, thanks for coming.
It really means a lot.
That's okay.
I mean I had the time and
I know you'd do the
same thing for me.
Yeah, you know I would.
I owe you a big one, sis.
Bingo, motel.
Thank God, what I wouldn't
give for a warm bath right now.
Ooh look, right
across the street.
Looks like some place
we can get a drink at.
Do you think they
have anything edible?
Probably not, but
definitely drinkable.
Think he's available?
He looks experienced.
Stop it.
Stop it.
You know I never thought
I'd be caught dead
in a dive like this.
Oh, no?
No, like honestly,
I don't even know the
name of this place,
or this town.
Where are we?
What is it called?
We are, um,
we are in a place with
they serve drinks.
In, in, in the town,
in the town of the drinks.
Oh my God, this beer
tastes so good, I can't even.
I know.
Speaking of that.
Excuse me, sir,
can we please, um,
I need another round of shots.
Thank you.
Sure thing ladies.
Wait, no, no, no,
no, I better not.
Yeah, come on, last one, or two.
Rave, I can't
Yeah, yes, you can.
You're not a
lightweight anymore,
that's what you said, come on.
You're gonna hang with
the, the big dogs.
The big.
Thank you.
Okay.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Oh my gosh.
Wait, wait, you promise
we have to call Kyle, Kyle.
Who, what was that?
We have to...
Who are we calling?
We have to call Kyle when
we get back to the room, okay?
Okay, promise.
We will call Kyle.
Do you promise?
I miss him so much.
I promise, I swear,
I swear, I promise.
Don't you miss him?
I'm sick of him.
You're such a b-word.
Okay, we're gonna take,
get your, no wait, hold on.
This?
Yep, finish your beer.
You already finished?
I did because I know,
I know how to drink.
You need to show me that
you know how to drink.
I told you I'm a lightweight.
Okay, drink it, don't spill it.
You gotta get it in your mouth.
Okay, ready?
Begin.
Ready.
Ready, go.
You're a fuckin' champion, dude.
I did it.
Okay, ready.
Okay.
Shots.
Oh, uh uh.
What is this?
Okay.
Um, to Kyle.
Best brother in the whole world.
Best boyfriend, future husband!
Oh my God, okay.
Ready?
Okay.
Cheers to you.
You can do it.
Yeah.
Okay, one more.
Come on, you're not a
little girl anymore.
Okay.
What are we, what
are we toasting to?
Rave, I can't.
Yes, you can.
Be brave.
Okay.
Ready?
Okay, ready?
To, what are we, what
are we cheersing to?
Don't, don't laugh at me.
Okay.
Okay, to best friends.
Wait.
And future sisters in laws.
Oh my God, okay.
Right though?
Yeah.
Let's do it.
Okay.
Yay!
Shots!
See, you are all
woman now, my friend.
Oh yeah.
All woman.
Yeah, fuck yeah I am.
I'm like a really
fucked up woman.
Oh my God.
Oh my God.
I'm dancing.
I love this song.
Wait, don't leave me here.
So psychic operator
Come on over
My body temperature
is growing colder
I need a favor
If it isn't skin
Off your shoulders
I need a girl
I need a true romance
Lorena Bobbit she
can get me to dance
A pair of scissors
To cut the pants
right off of me
This is murder
Bloody murder
If this is murder
Why am I not dying
Check them out over there.
What?
I think the one on
the right likes you.
Stop.
Come on, he's kind of cute
in like a dipstick
backwoods kind of way.
Oh my god.
You're kidding me.
Come on, looks can be deceiving.
I bet you his dad owns some,
I don't know, local
textile company.
I'm sure he's worth a fortune.
What are you talking about?
Jesus.
I'll prove it to you.
What?
Hi boys.
My friend over there,
she thinks you're real cute.
It's my birthday.
Hey there.
So, what you think?
Excuse me?
About how the other half lives.
Uh, sorry, I don't, I
don't know what you mean.
You're a New York girl, right?
That's what your friend
was just telling us.
Said you're a New York City girl
who wanted to come down here
and see how the
other half lives.
That's why you came down.
You mind if I sit down?
No.
I mean yes, yes.
Thanks.
Ricky, get me another beer.
Please.
So you're Jessica?
Right?
I'm Buddy.
That's Levi.
Pleased to meet you.
You need you another beer?
No, no, I, thanks, I'm good.
Is that really why you
came all the way down here?
I don't know if I buy that.
Uh, actually, I'm
helping my friend,
my boyfriend's sister move.
I mean, move her car up there.
She's moving.
Ooh, I don't know why
I'm telling you this,
you don't need to know this.
I don't even know you.
Well, uh, there's no
call to be rude about it.
I was just trying
to be welcoming.
Maybe you think you're
too good to talk to me.
Your friend said otherwise,
but maybe you do.
I never said I was
too good to talk to you.
I, I never said that.
Well, good.
That's more like it.
Uh, no, I didn't, I didn't,
I didn't mean that either.
Um, excuse me, I have to go,
I have to use the, uh...
Ladies room?
Powder your nose?
You're a New York
City girl, aren't you?
Ricky, where's my goddamn beer?
Lazy son of a bitch.
What the fuck?
Let's go.
Oh God.
I think they're following us.
Who?
Them.
Where you taking
those asses, ladies?
The party ain't over yet.
Is it?
It doesn't have to be.
Do you want it to be?
Oh, hell no.
Well you two gentlemen,
you just wait right here.
I have something real
special I want to show you.
Yeah.
No peeking now.
What you got in there?
I was thinking we could
all just have a little fun.
Hold on.
Fuck, you crazy bitch.
That shit ain't even loaded.
You want to test that theory?
Oh, no, it's cool.
We just had the wrong idea.
Yeah, you bet your
chicken lickin' ass you did.
What are you gonna
do, you gonna stab me?
I guarantee you I'll
shoot your dick off
before you get close.
Put it away.
Put that shit away.
Yeah, listen to your friend.
Now you assholes listen up.
I got the night manager
watching my car all night.
If either of you show
your faces here again,
I will shoot your
dicks off so fast
you won't even be able to blink.
Am I clear?
Yeah.
Yeah, listen.
Fuck it.
Yeah, that's right, fuck it.
We gone.
Yeah.
Go on.
Get the fuck out?
Yeah, fuck you,
too, motherfucker.
You see him with that
little pussy ass knife?
Fuckin' hell.
You comin'?
Yeah.
Feel better?
Did that scare you?
Did it scare me?
I think I left a huge puddle
back in that parking lot.
I'm sorry man,
sometimes you gotta do what
you gotta do, you know?
What if those guys come back?
I mean you really didn't say
anything to the motel manager.
Yeah, but they don't know that.
Plus if they do,
they'll be sorry.
Let's call Kyle, remember.
I already tried him, no answer.
Hmm, when I was in the
shower, why would you do that?
Well call him back.
No answer.
Sorry.
Well let me try.
I just told you
there was no answer.
Well just let me.
No.
Give it.
Come on, what's the point?
Raven, stop.
I told you that
there was no answer -
I want to talk to Kyle, please.
Just give it to me.
Are you kidding here?
No.
Just please let me call him.
No.
Please.
Okay, go for it.
Uh, that's weird.
It's not going to his voicemail.
Well, maybe you hit a
different number on the keypad.
It happens.
This is Kyle Richards.
Sorry I can't take
your call right now.
If you know me,
you know I'm busy saving
and preserving life.
Please leave a message
and I'll get back to you
just as soon as I can.
Hi, baby, it's me.
I guess you're working.
Or I know you're working or
else you would have picked up.
Or I would be waking you up
which would be so rude
with you working so hard.
Anyway, everything's going fine.
For the most part.
Nothing to worry about.
I just wanted to
hear your voice.
I miss you.
I love you.
Bye.
Like I said, no answer.
So I got his voicemail.
Do you have his
number in there twice?
Is one of them old?
I don't know, maybe you
just hit the wrong button.
It's bad.
I'm sorry.
We need to notify a supervisor
and get detectives out here.
Why did you do that last night?
What?
You know what.
Save our asses?
Get that guy to hit on me.
Who does something like that?
We were drunk, I was
just having a little fun.
Is that what it was,
you were having fun?
No, it, you want
me to be honest?
Yeah, I do, I do, I
want you to be honest.
I was testing you.
Testing me, testing what?
I wanted to see if you
were worthy of my brother.
To see if you
really deserved him.
I wanted to see
what you would do
when some guy really wants you.
I mean really wants you.
I'm gonna have to make sure
you're not some dumb slut
who gets drunk and gives
it up to the first guy
that tells her she's pretty.
Who's living in some
bullshit delusion
that if she fucks some guy that
he actually cares about her.
If you want me to be honest,
that's what I wanted to know.
Don't worry, you passed.
Now let's get the fuck out
of here because I'm famished.
Want to get some
biscuits and gravy.
You know, the kind of food that
really sticks to your ribs.
Pretty good, huh?
These out of the
way Podunk towns
have the best fucking food.
Better than sex.
And it definitely
lasts longer at least.
Is it good enough to pay for
or are we gonna
dine and dash again?
Oh, look at you, so funny.
Well your sense of humor's
definitely improving,
I gotta give you that one.
I gotta piss, I'll
be right back.
Just a little game we play.
Stupid girl stuff, you know?
Not eating off the
floor now, are you?
I mean this place is good
and everything, but...
Uh, no.
Good luck.
Thought we could use it.
You ready to go?
Yeah, sure.
Whenever you are.
I got this.
Oh, thanks, how sweet.
I'll meet you in the car.
You got any ID?
I think I'm gonna go
lie down in the back.
Why don't you just
put your seat back?
No, it's too bright
up here, I can't sleep.
You wanna watch
my stuff back there?
What the fuck?
Excuse me,
do you know where
highway 301 is?
The 301 north, I, I think
it's around here someplace.
Do you know where that is?
I'm sorry, I don't know
where no highway 301 is.
So you live around here
and you have no idea
where highway 301 is?
I don't know
what you want me to say.
I don't want you
to say anything.
You know what I want you to do?
I want you to go home and
fuck your mother some more,
you fucking hick.
Jessica.
Jessica, where in
the hell are you?
Please call me back.
My God, they found
her in her house.
She's dead.
She's dead.
My sister is dead.
Please, please call me.
I don't know who in
the hell you're with,
but please call me.
Sir!
Open the door!
Hello!
Hello!
Help me!
You done sleeping?
Can you take over for a while?
Sure.
All right, scoot.
Go on.
Okay.
You okay, you seem tense?
Yeah, um, I, I, I think
I got a kink in my neck
or something from lying in back.
See, I told you not to do that.
Just relax.
Man, I can feel it.
See, we can just get all of
that tension right out of there.
You know I forgot to tell you,
I have great news,
I found your phone.
You must have been in the
restroom or something,
I don't know where
I found it, but.
The funny thing is that
I put it in my purse.
And when I went
to give it to you,
it wasn't there.
Isn't that funny?
I thought it was really funny.
You want to know what I think
is really fucking
hilarious though?
That you are supposed
to be the smart girl,
psychology major.
But it seems like I can
read you a whole lot better
than you can read me.
You know your poker
face is for shit, right?
Oh no, no, don't
even think about it.
See then,
you'd fuck up that pretty
little face of yours,
and then you'd fuck up my car.
And then where
would we be, right?
So what now?
Well, we have two options.
You want to go and
see Kyle, right?
Make it back to New York?
I was thinking
that we could all get together
and have a nice little chat.
You know, like mature adults.
Like how grown-ups do.
So there's that or
there's the other option,
but I really don't think that
you're gonna like that one.
We still have a long ways to go.
What, are we gonna play
hot seat some more?
Wow.
You got a set of
balls on you, girl.
Okay, fine, how about this?
You can ask me any
question you like.
Go ahead, shoot.
What did you do?
What did you do
to Kyle's sister?
Oh, I don't think that
you want to know about that.
All the gory details.
I wouldn't want to offend
your delicate sensibilities.
Trust me.
Who are you then?
Who are you really, Jade?
How do you know my name?
I asked you a fucking question!
How the fuck do
you know my name?
Where did you get this?
In between the seats.
You must have dropped it.
I must have.
Silly me.
I'm always losing things.
You know I, I always
hated this picture.
But Kyle loved it.
He said I was the most beautiful
woman in the entire world.
He'd tell me all the time
while he was fucking me.
How much he loved me.
I knew him long before
you did, sweetie pie.
I mean, how do you think we met?
Do you like to
shoot guns, Jessica?
I, I never really
liked them before.
But I went to the firing range
and popped off a couple shots,
and I have to say,
it's pretty easy.
Not my favorite way
to kill people though.
It's just too fast, you know,
it's just bang and
then you're dead.
I'd much prefer
to really
get to know somebody, you know.
Find out
every little thing
about them, you know.
Just really get to know
them, from the inside out.
So Jess,
big question.
Do you like our little game?
I feel like we're really
getting to know each other now.
Don't you think?
You know all about me.
I already know everything
about you to know.
I've known girls like
you my entire life.
The pretty girls,
the smart ones who, you know,
everything was
just handed to you.
Adored by daddy.
And all the boys
just come running
as soon as you bat your
little fucking eyelashes.
I mean basically like
they're handing you
their dicks on a platter.
It's incredible though really.
Ooh, what do you need, honey?
Can we do anything for you?
Oh no, no, don't bother
yourself, I'll get it.
Oh, here, honey, let me
wipe your ass for you.
Sound familiar?
Am I on the right track?
No.
What was that, I couldn't hear.
No, you're fucking not!
You don't know me.
You don't know
anything about me.
Adored by daddy?
Yeah, until he died
when I was ten.
And let's just say mom couldn't
find a suitable replacement.
But there were men around,
there were plenty of men.
So don't sit there and
tell me I had it easy.
I mean you can do
anything you want,
you have the fucking gun,
but don't think for a minute
you know anything about me.
You're right, Jess.
I do have the gun,
which means
that we're gonna play
by my rules, okay.
So you can sit
there all you want
and tell me about
your sad stories
about how mommy was a
whore and daddy died,
but the truth is I don't
really give a shit.
Don't think about getting
brave on me, sweetie.
As much as I'd like
to tear you open,
I'll shoot you so fast you
won't know what hit you.
Then you can't go home to Kyle.
Can't have that little chat
like grown-ups now, can we?
So you're gonna be a good girl
and listen to everything
I have to say.
Got it?
I want to hear you say
that you understand.
I understand.
That's a good girl.
Stop the car.
I said stop the fucking car.
Now this is what we're gonna do.
I'm gonna let him in.
And if you try anything
or I hear a word out of you,
I'll shoot that tight little
pussy of yours off, okay.
Get in!
Let's go.
Oh, thank you, thank
you, thank you, thank you.
Oh, you are angels, both of you.
You wouldn't believe the
luck I'm having today.
You wouldn't believe it.
It's like somebody put a voodoo
curse on me or something.
That bad?
It couldn't be worse.
What are you late for the prom?
My buddy's wedding.
I'm the best man.
Well it looks like you
don't have the best car.
Tell me about it.
Anyway, two days ago my buddy
tells me he's getting married.
Two days and he wants
me to be his best man.
So where is the
blessed occasion?
Hartford.
I knew my transmission
was on the fritz.
One wrong turn and then boom
I'm stuck out in the
middle of nowhere.
On top of that,
I'm in such a hurry I forget
my freaking phone charger.
Now my car is dead,
my phone is dead,
and I am stuck in
the middle of nowhere
with people zooming by me,
laughing their asses off at me.
Can you believe that?
It definitely
hasn't been your day.
Listen, I just need to get
to the next town, all right.
Somewhere where
I can rent a car.
Or somewhere where I
can at least get a cab
to a place where I can rent one.
Thank God there are
still two decent people
in the world like you two.
This is all pretty out of
the, all of a sudden, huh?
Just caught in the
middle of everything.
Yeah, yeah, I'm caught
in the middle all right.
Or the ass end.
I don't even know which.
So how long did this friend
of yours know this girl?
Not long.
A few months, maybe.
He met her on a cruise.
You know it's so funny,
we were just talking
about a friend of ours
who just shacked up with
this guy out of nowhere.
Weren't we?
Yeah, apparently he's
all goo goo gaga for her.
You know, madly in love.
The whole deal.
And we just kept telling her,
what a stupid bitch you
are to fall for a guy.
I mean, she doesn't
even know the guy.
Right, how can you
get to know somebody
like that so quickly?
You can't.
Yeah, yeah, I don't know, I, uh.
So we're like, you
stupid little cunt.
You're gonna get hurt.
Like I'm talking
full-on devastated,
your ass will never be
the same again hurt.
And you're gonna deserve it.
I mean whatever happens to you,
you're gonna deserve it.
Right?
Yeah, I don't know,
maybe you're being a
little hard on your friend.
So you guys from Georgia?
Saw the plates when
I was getting in.
You guys moving?
Where you headed to?
Stop the car.
What?
I said stop the car!
Get out.
Don't move.
Get out.
Did you see what you made me do?
You made me kill the best man.
Oh, come on, not in the car.
I can't tell you where we
are, Kyle, okay, I can't.
You have to understand
what I'm doing.
I'm doing this for us,
I'm doing it so it can go
back to the way it was.
No, you don't understand.
She's the one that did this.
She poisoned your mind
against me, I know it was her.
She did all of this.
To us, to me, and
I have to fix it.
I'm just trying to fix
it, don't you understand?
No, Kyle, no, you
can't say that to me!
No, no.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I
didn't mean it, I'm sorry.
Listen, I'm gonna fix it and
everything's gonna be okay.
She is the one that
came between us.
She is the one that
did all of this.
She is the one
that killed Raven.
It's her fault.
I didn't want it to happen,
I didn't want to have to
do that, but she made me.
She did all of this.
No.
No, don't say that.
Now listen,
you don't understand, it's okay.
I know that you don't
right now, but you will.
I love you.
Pretty little Jessica.
You knew this had to happen.
You poisoned him against me.
And he just doesn't understand
right now, but he will.
He's gonna see that
pretty little face
and that pretty little
bod of yours sliced open.
I'm not usually one for
vengeance, Jess, but
when you take something
that isn't yours
you need to be punished.
So I was thinking that we
could play your favorite game.
Hot seat.
Except this time,
if you don't answer
one of my questions,
I get to slice open a
different body part.
What do you think?
First I'll cut over here,
and watch you bleed
out a little bit.
And then all across your
stomach and your sides.
I'll cut out your heart,
so you know what it feels
like to have it ripped out,
and taken away from you.
I bet your insides are pretty.
Just like you.
Now you stay here,
I'll be right back.
Aw Jess,
you're making this way too easy.
You know I like to play with
my food before I eat it.
No, stop.
Stop.
No.
Oh, oh.
What, are you gonna shoot me?
Fucking bitch!
Who do you think you are?
Who the fuck do
you think you are?
You think no one
else has felt pain?
You think you're
fucking special?
What gives you the right?
Come in.
Hey, how are you?
I'm fine, um,
just a little tired.
Made some tea, do you want any?
Oh no, I'm good.
Just catching up
on some reading.
I'm probably going to bed soon.
Well let us know if
you need anything, okay?
Hey, Jen,
thanks for letting
me stay here a while.
I really appreciate it.
Do you want us to shut the door?
Oh no, I'm good.
Life's so random, isn't it?
I mean people meet,
relationships start and
then just suddenly end.
Bad shit happens, out
of the fucking blue.
It's like life's
some cosmic joke.
I mean I'm telling you
God has got to be a woman
because only a real
bitch would do that shit
to people's lives.
Well, this isn't random.
It's necessary.
And you know that,
and I know it.
We both know it.
Well listen, maybe, you know,
we'll get a chance to be
best friends in another life.
You never know.
Cheers to that.
Here's to another life.
To another life.
Can I leave it up to you
Is there nothing I can do
But I keep it to myself
I'm in love with
someone else
Wonder which way will it go
I'll probably be
the last to know
I've been stranded
here for days
And I'm thirsty
for some shade
So you better run and hide
I've got the
devil on my side
Waiting for me
Like a beggar on the street
As I close in on my prey
Will it keep
still or run away
I seek shelter
from the light
Like a thief into the night
Even in the cons we see
To let you go
Cause I believe
and I don't know
The more I think
Therefore the less I know
And even if we fail to flee
Let you in
Cause deep within
my skeleton
I just want to shed my skin